Matooke Republic September 28 -October 4 2017 by Matooke Republic

2 MATOOKE REPUBLIC/ Thursday,

September 28 - 4 October, 2017

Seven Days

Social Media I Trending I Vibe

NEWS DIGEST Speaker Rebecca Kadaga has supended State minister for Water Ronald Kibuule over possession of a gun Katende Yunusu Jamil Kadaga order for any halali drink on my bill i will pay. Now others look here have you already sensed it like me that some of our opposition members are the next to be punished mbu balancing sides. Ocaya Thomas Oroma Pen-Mogi Where were the police with their much hype intelligence of only detecting Lukwago and so plan demo. Honestly this regime has lost the correct line, like it was quite correctly write Dr Warrant sister. Daniel Zziwa How did he get passed the 3 security checks at the main gate and then at the main doors into Parliament? Security team should be put to task, they are busy checking for red ribbons and caps while people are getting guns through on their watch!with tempers flaring in parliament someone could have been shot within the plenary. Inno Tumwebaze I hv started doubting the competance of security officers, how could they fail to detect a gun? . what they know is to pose with dogs and run after people with badanas.A gun and bandana which is more dangerous Mpoza Abubaker For kibule no wonder even he was announced for victory on gun point because he was defeated by mulima mayuni bt he put Mis sarah on gun point to declear him Iraneaus Wafula I am reading Kadaga like a poem. I can easily tell the denotative structure of Kadaga. By today,I will have analysed her connotative attitude toward the The Age Limit Bill

UCC stops live coverage of events that incite the public”

age limit motion tabled after fight in parliament The motion to table a bill to lift the President Age Limit was finally tabled in Parliament on Wednesday after two unsuccessful attempts that were foiled by rowdy opposition MPs. Speaker Kadaga suspended 25 MPs and it took fist and chair fights to throw them out of Parliament. The remaining opposition MPs walked out in protest over the way their colleagues were manhandled by security forces, leaving NRM MPs to have their will.

Lukwago demands Shs700m in compensation after police brutality

Uganda Communications Commission (UCC) yesterday stopped all radios and TVs from broadcasting events as they happen or what many term as live coverage saying they incite the public. According to UCC any media house that does this is breaching minimum broadcasting standards. The government body immediately ordered TVs and radios to refrain from broadcasting live feeds, warning that failure to comply may result in suspension and cancellation of their licences.

NRM's Abiriga admits to urinating on wall fence Arua Municipality Col. Ibrahim Abiriga added to his growing list of embarrassments when he was captured on camera this week while urinating on the wall fence of Ministry of Finance building and was unapologetic for his action. The legislator confessed to have eased himself along the street. “I was badly off”, Abiriga told media, as the MP instead blamed WhasApp for spreading the picture of him urinating in public.

Vipers’ Lawrence Mulindwa to track down Villa ‘hooligans

Lord Mayor Erias Lukwago, who was brutally manhandled by police outside his home last week, has filed a complaint against the Police Force and demanded Shs700m in compensation. While at the Uganda Human Rights Commission offices, Lukwago stated that the Police dehumanised him during the arrest and squeezed his private parts. He urged UHRC to take action this time because this does not only happen to him but the entire public.

Vipers SC owner Lawrence Mulindwa has vowed to go after a section of SC Villa fans for their “acts of hooliganism” and has described them as a disgrace to principles of sportsmanship after they vandalised his St. Mary’s stadium in Kitende last weekend. The chaos happened during a Vipers-Villa game where Villa fans turned unruly at halftime because referee Alex Muhabi’s had denied them a penalty.

Just for laughs

Milo Faisal This old pig is just mocking opposition MPs, now she is suspending this other nrm piglet after suspending 25 opposition MPs!!!!!!!!!!!!! To hell with nrm. Kwame MK Nziza Why come with agun to parliament with a deadly weapon ?His reckless and outrageous action in the less few years reminds me of a much young Odongo Otto.

CONTACT US Matooke Republic Media Ltd. Kiwatule -Naalya Road. P.o. Box 11393 Kampala, Uganda Phone: 0392 000124 Email: info@matookerepublic.com website: www.matookerepublic. com Facebook: www.facebook.com/ matookerepublic Twitter: @matookerepublic

#Tojikwatako‫@ ‏‬nasawali_phame “We should defend our constitution before it’s too weak to defend us”-@HEBobiwine #AgeLimit #Togikwatako #Tojikwatako #TogetherWeSpeak BOBI WINE‫‏‬V @HEBobiwine BOBI WINE Retweeted Mujuni Raymond Ugandans except “Traitors” are against the amendment. Silent ones fear apprehension thus speak through us that represent them #Tojikwatako Mujuni Raymond‫@ ‏‬qataharraymond Spoken to four of the five MPs that represent me and they are all against the amendment of the age limit clause

Thursday September 28-October 4, 2017, MATOOKE REPUBLIC 3

Murders I Insecurity

News

What happened to crime preventers? By OUR REPORTER

The coordinator of the National Crime Preventers put the number at 5m, which means that for every eight people, there is a crime preventer. That would make crime as good as solved, but Entebbe murders alone show it’s a different story

ecurity chiefs have reportedly told President Yoweri Museveni who is currently in the United States, to first halt the contentious move to amend the presidential age limit. According to Chimpreports, over the weekend, the intelligence community led by Security Minister, Lt. Gen. Henry Tumukunde made phone calls to dozens of selected Members of Parliament to get their “honest” views on the blistering plans to change Article 102 of the Constitution. Security was shocked to learn that the numbers that the architects of the amendment are boasting of may not be real, and that there is a likeliness of violence breaking out in the house, with a potential overactive spillover to the streets in Kampala and different urban centers. Two weeks ago, the Inspector General of Police, General Kale Kayihura, was chest-thumping after a dozen people were arraigned in court for the murder of over 20 women in different parts of Wakiso District. General Kayihura assured the country that the killers’ group that had been nipped in the bud. In the meeting with the residents at Nansana, Wakiso District, he attributed the success to his crime prevention system that comprises of crime preventers, who gathered intelligence on the criminals and shared it with the police. He packed up his belongings and tent at Nansana, where he had pitch-camped for more than Women mourn the a month, and returned to Kamloss of their loved one. pala City with a sense of victory. Barely a week after he had left Wakiso District, two more women were found killed in Katabi Sub-county in Wakiso District. It brought the number of trained in police work and some of murdered women in Wakiso District them were given firearms to help to 22 since May this year. police carry out patrols. The latest victim was Sarah The Coordinator of the National Neriima. Her body was dumped in Crime Preventers Forum, Blaise KaMpala Police Post backyard. mugisha, said their numbers around Katabi residents wondered how the country had swelled to five milsuch a crime could be committed in lion crime preventers. This means an area with heavy security. that every eight citizens, there is a It also raises questions on crime preventer. whether the highly billed crime The mathematics seems not to prevention system is working. tally as the Internal Affairs Ministry Before the 2016 Presidential elecpolicy statement for this financial tions, police spent all its energies year talks about 30 crime prevenon recruiting crime preventers all ters (30 per cent females) per each over the country. of the 54,000 villages in the country. General Kayihura said they This is around 1.6m crime preventargeted to have at least 30 crime ters. preventers per village. And by Uganda Police Force budgeted January 2016, he was talked about more than Shs37.4bn for the crime a million crime preventers in the preventers. country. This meant that every 35 The crime preventers were given people, there was a crime preventer. motorcycles, which they were to use The crime preventers were

Crime preventers being passed out before the 2016 electifons.

Kayihura gives locals assurance that the murders would be no more.

“

Murders and violent robberies are up. Have the crime preventers now turned into crime presenters? in intelligence gathering.

Neighbourhood watch Again, police narrowed the scope. They introduced Neighbourhood Watch (dubbed Mayumba Kumi) where 10 households are clustered into one group. Each member of the group shares contacts with the area police so that they can tip detec-

tives about crime. Despite the two systems of community police crime preventions, the crime rate in the country continues to rise.

Crime preventers are nowhere to be seen Going by the police statistical ratios, areas of Katabi and Nansana where the population is close 700,000 people, there would be at least 60,000 crime preventers in there. Unfortunately, many of the women are picked from entertainment places at busy periods, but none in the hyped crime preventers numbers has been able to give a clue about the suspected criminals. This has even prompted President Yoweri Museveni to personally carry out investigations in a bid to try to stop the murders. Gen Kayihura too concedes about gaps in the crime prevention system while he was at Nansana.

“If we had crime preventers on ground, these killers could have been easy identified by the community and dealt with before they committed the crimes,” General Kayihura said. After the 2016 general elections, the Police Director of Logistics and Engineering, Mr Geoffrey Bangirana, ordered every crime preventer to return police equipment, including uniforms and batons, which had been given to them. Later, General Kayihura ordered police commanders to chase crime preventers from the police stations and posts. “What are people who aren’t paid doing at police stations? I don’t want to see these crime preventers at stations. Crime preventers must be in the villages not at the police station,” General Kayihura told police commanders at Kigo Marine Base. The shadow Internal Affairs Minister, Muwanga Kivumbi (Member of Parliament for Butambala), who was against the training and mobilisation of crime preventers, said the group was just a political tool to be used in the elections to canvas votes from President Yoweri Museveni using government money. Indeed, after the general elections, the group has disappeared. Robert Asiimwe, the councillor for Naguru II in Nakawa Division and the area defence secretary, said the crime preventers they used to hire to carry out foot patrols gave up after they failed to facilitate them. “As residents, we used to contribute money to facilitate them. When residents failed meet the promises, the crime preventers gave up with their work and left. We lost more than 40 crime preventers which is a big gap in security,” Asiimwe said. One of the major mobilisers in the National Crime Preventers Forum, who doesn’t want to be named, said the numbers were exaggerated or got through giving the youth false promises. “Some youth came because they were told that if they participated, they were either going to get jobs or funding from the government,” the former crime preventer said. He said the leaders of the forum even started a savings cooperative called Mwangaza Sacco, in which the government was to inject funds for their development. “Many youth were told to save money in the Sacco and later get loans. After they had saved their money, a minimum of Shs15,000 per month, they neither got the loans nor give back their savings. Many got annoyed and abandoned the project,” he said. Some sections of the public believe that some disoriented crime preventers have now become crime presenters behind the spate of crime that includes the escalating violent robberies and murders.

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14 MATOOKE REPUBLIC / Thursday, September 28 -

Body & Soul

4 October, 2017

Living I Relating

SCI-FACT

Orgasm is overrated, says this study

WHY WE STAY

FRIENDS WITH THE EX

Why this is important: Because the female orgasm just got a little less mysterious.

How do we even start? Perhaps by letting you know a new study suggests that there is no such thing as a vaginal orgasm.

relate

Let’s get in really deep

Unlocking the matters of the heart

Science says that you’ve been having sex all wrong, as a new study suggests that when it comes to female sexual pleasure, there is no such thing as a vaginal orgasm, and that clitoral stimulation is key in actually getting a woman off during sex. While we’ve always known that paying a little extra attention to the clitoris heightens a woman’s orgasm odds, these new findings could completely change the game when it comes to how we do the deed, and influence what women expect from their partners in bed. The study, co-conducted by Italian sexologist Dr. Vincenzo Puppo, surveyed women worldwide and found that the majority of them could not achieve orgasm through penetrative sex. While society has long believed that different types of female orgasm exist (vaginal, clitoral and G-spot), Dr. Puppo and his team claim that the female orgasm, just like the male orgasm, shouldn’t be dissected in a way that suggests stimulating different parts of the anatomy yields different, yet equally satisfying results — instead, the umbrella term “female orgasm” should be used, and a focus on clitoral stimulation, accompanied by a combination of pleasurable sexual sensations, will most likely to lead to one. What’s definitely not going to get your girlfriend off? Straight-up penetration.

f you are desperately looking for one thing to mess up your relationship that is not cheating, you might want to try being friends with your ex—and letting your partner know about it. It does not matter how much trust you have for each other, the mere knowledge that your man sent his ex-girlfriend a Happy Birthday message, or that she is chatting ‘innocent’ chats with her ex-boyfriend on WhatsApp is certain to make people break things in the house. No one will care about your explanations about you just being friends or never really being each other other’s type. All that bae sees in your exchanges is the potential for this to end in a bed somewhere. But why would people really stay friends with their exes?

Ask the big question: How will this information affect how I

It’s about the money

approach sexual situations from now on?

Michael Nsubuga

is just too violent or he is not about to give up his cheating ways. But what if he is the kind who had no qualms blowing Shs5m in one weekend on a shopping spree for you? If his money can solve half your problems, or her dimes can keep the landlord away for a while longer, you are not going to let that friendship die easily.

Social relationships It’s about the kids

If there are children involved, it is going to be much harder for bae to disconnect from his or her past. It might be music to your ears, but it really might serve the child or children they had with their ex much better if the parents enjoy a civil relationship. And the fact they are not fighting anymore might actually allow them to become the friends they failed to become when they were together.

Sentimentality

Sometimes you accept that a relationship cannot continue because your man

Have you ever found yourself somewhat entangled in a friendship with an ex because you realise they had this unique

HEALTH

What you can do to manage jet lag

ver stepped off a plane and felt unwell as you try to settle into your new surroundings? The most likely condition you might be experiencing is something known as jet lag. Jet lag, which is also known as time zone change syndrome, is a temporary sleep problem that can affect anyone who quickly travels across multiple time zones. It will last one or two days most times, with a feeling of daytime fatigue as well as difficulty staying alert, stomach problems, insomnia and mood changes being some of the prime symptoms. Fortunately, there are steps you can take to help prevent or minimise jet lag.

Preventing jet lag

You can help prevent or reduce jet lag by following these six tips and strategies:

Snooze on the plane

Try to sleep on the plane if you are traveling eastward and into a new day. Bring earplugs and eye masks to help dampen noise and light.

destination a few days early so you can acclimate before any big event or meeting you plan to attend.

Stay off the booze Pick a flight that allows you to arrive in the early evening. This way, staying up until it is time for bed in your new time zone isn’t as hard.

Avoid alcohol and caffeine the day before and the day of your flight. These drinks can interfere with your natural clock and prevent sleep. They may ultimately make the symptoms of jet lag worse.

Take a power nap

Treating jet lag

Select flight times strategically

If bedtime is too far out and you need a nap, take a power nap of no more than 20 to 30 minutes. Don’t sleep longer than that as this may prevent sleep later in the night.

Plan extra days

Take a cue from athletes, and arrive to your

trait that your partner doesn’t have enough of? Like the fact that your ex was a great listener and your new man is not so much? You could also be hooked for sentimental reasons if you still can’t get over his looks, even if you accept that that was the only thing he had to offer.

Jet lag doesn’t always require treatment, but a few options are available if the symptoms persist. Some of the remedies available are taking in a bit of sunshine, using artificial light (both ‘restart’ your system) as well as resting well before travel and observing standard mealtimes.

Sometimes you are forced to stay friends with the ex because all his or her friends are your friends. You end up at the same parties, still call the in-laws and your social networks are so intertwined, even your professional contacts are the same.

Free sex

But of course! Exes are the best possible source of no strings attached sex. First, there are no inhibitions involved because each one knows the other’s needs too well, and perhaps just as importantly, they also accept other’s limitations. Now you see why bae really, really wants you out of the reach of your ex?

LAUGH & LOVE Meet my little brother A guy takes his girlfriend to his bedroom, drops his pants, and says, “Meet my little brother.” The girlfriend picks up her purse on the way out and says, “Yea, call me when he grows up.”

SWEETEST TABOO Use his nipples

His nipples like a little TLC too, for your information... Surveys show men have admitted that the nipples are one of their top hot spots. Bite on them and you will have him screaming in joy.

Thursday, September 28 - 4 October, /MATOOKE REPUBLIC 15

Kids I Mums I Dads

Parenting

Celebrating all great dads

mama sandy

“

I for one was raised by a man of valour for a father. As if that was not a blessing enough, I have gone on to watch my husband be the best father to our three beautiful children.

ast week I visited the dentist and while there, I watched different fathers come in with their children for moral support. This gave me a feeling of joy because I am always saddened watching stories of men raping girls, killing wives, cheating on their partners and so forth. No one ever applauds this category of men who escort their wives for antenatal checks, who do the house chores in turns with wifey, who make time to pick and drop their children to school, who support their families at every given time. So today, I will write about the father. Yes, the head of the family, the bread winner, the hard worker, the one who toils to give his children a comfortable life. A good father makes all the difference in a child’s life. He is a pillar of strength, support and disci-

pline. His work is endless and, oftentimes, thankless. But in the end, it shows in the sound, well-adjusted children he raises. I for one was raised by a man of valour for a father. As if that was not a blessing enough, I have gone on to watch my husband be the best father to our three beautiful children. Oftentimes we have listened to so many songs of mothers being “heroes” and we give little or no attention to the fathers. One may ask, “Aren’t these their responsibilities?” Sure, they are but no one signs a contract to do all the above and there is no guarantee that every father fulfills their responsibility. Some run away and opt for less demanding lives. This is why we should never take it for granted that there are some fathers out there that are really doing an amazing job. As for the single fathers, words fail me but I pray for blessings unto you. You make life worth living and you give family a new meaning despite of the daily struggles. It is from you that our sons strive to be better men in future. For they have been raised by the best...

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Thursday: September 28, 2017 EUROPE: Europa League - Group Stage 18:00

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