OMTimes Magazine December B 2019 Edition

December B Issue

RIANE EISLER

Nurturing our Humanty Log On Our Website and Learn more in how to Live a Conscious Lifestyle: OMTimes.com

CONTENTS HEALTH & HEALING

48

BATTLING INFERTILITY AND INCREASING YOUR CHANCES TO CONCEIVE NATURALLY IN YOUR 40’S

SPIRITUALITY

56

WITNESS THE NEW YEAR WITH A HEART-FILLED MIND

60

MESSAGES THAT ARE HEAVEN SCENT

SPOTLIGHT RIANE EISLER: NURTURING OUR HUMANITY

TRENDS ARE WE BEING REACTIVE OR PROACTIVE?

METAPHYSICS

110

5 WAYS TO FEEL CONNECTED TO THOSE WHO HAVE PASSED ON

OMLIVING

68

HOW TO QUIET THE MIND THROUGH YOGA

72

BENEFITS OF THE SUDARSHAN KRIYA BREATHING

80

12 WAYS TO BOOST MIND, BODY, SPIRIT IN 2020

98

HOST INTERVIEW PERSONAL GROWTH

RELATIONSHIPS YOUR ABUSIVE BOSS WILL NEVER CHANGE

WISE EMOTIONS VERSUS BLIND EMOTIONS

104 6 SECRETS TO EMOTIONAL INTIMACY WORLD VISION

140 THE NEED FOR A GLOBAL PATRIOTISM

WHAT IS DANGEROUS ABOUT BEING BORED? 10 INSIGHTS ABOUT EGO, YOU HAD NO IDEA ABOUT TAMING AND TRAINING THE MONKEY MIND

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DECEMBER 2019|Â OMTIMES

RIANE EISLER EXCLUSIVE

NURTURING OUR HUMANITY

By Sandie Sedgbeer

EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW | OMTIMES

"In sum, the struggle for our future is . . . the struggle between those who cling to patterns of domination and those working for a more equitable partnership world."

Riane Eisler

Everywhere we turn from news to books and movies, we are bombarded with the same hackneyed message: human nature is inherently bad. Looking at the senseless violence, the greed, murder, rape, and war around us, we humans, it seems, are genetically wired for selfish, cruel behavior.

Or are we? Are violence, greed, domination, and control really a fundamental and ineradicable part of human nature?

Absolutely not, says cultural historian, social systems scientist, and author, Riane Eisler, whose international bestseller, The Chalice, and the Blade has been hailed as the most important book since Darwin's Origin of Species.

In this interview with Sandie Sedgbeer, Riane Eisler discusses her latest book, Nurturing Our Humanity: How Domination and Partnership Shape our Brains, Lives, and Future, coauthored with anthropologist Douglas P. Fry, in which they both upend age-old assumptions about human nature and provide irrefutable evidence that not only is caring behavior humanity's default tendency but also that we can build more humane and sustainable societies.

Nurturing Our Humanity Sandie Sedgbeer: Your book, Nurturing Our Humanity: How Domination and Partnership Shape our Brains, Lives, and Future makes sobering reading. Â The statistics are pretty darn, horrifying. I didn't know whether to be elated or depressed. And yet, you also paint a picture of how we can be, and about what sort of society we can create if we pay attention to what is needed. Your book, The Chalice and the Blade sold more than half a million copies worldwide, and LA weekly said that it may be the most significant work published in all our lifetimes. The well-known Chilean author, Isabel Allende, said that it's one of those magnificent key books that can transform us and initiate fundamental changes in the world. That was published in 1988. Â What inspired you to write this new book 31 years later? Is it because those fundamental changes are not being initiated?

Riane Eisler:

Well, that is certainly part of it.

Another part of it is simply that as the years have gone by, my research has deepened and broadened. And so, in Nurturing our Humanity, I combined my research and my new approach to understanding human societies with two new, very important areas. One is neuroscience because what we're learning in terms of the conceptual framework introduced in my work is what the subtitle says - that our brains develop differently, in the coaches that orient more to the partnership or the domination side of the social continuum. The second area, I've been working on this book for 10 years, and three years ago, I invited Doug Fry to be my co-author because he is one of the world's authorities on foraging societies.

And we're all familiar with that old story, aren't

They looked a lot like the Taliban, the Inquisition,

we? About “the selfish genes, evolutionary

the Crusades, the witch burnings. Women had no

imperatives, too bad, you know, that's just how

rights. Children have no rights. But we've had one

we developed? So, rape and killing and injustice,

progression after another. I was born into one,

they're just human nature.” And what he calls

the rise of Hitler, in Europe, first in Germany, and

‘foraging societies,’ show how humans lived for millennia, the original partnership societies. So, this book ends with some very practical and very important cornerstones that my research shows are essential if we're to move to a more equitable and sustainable future.

Sandie Sedgbeer: It seems that over the past few decades, we are devolving rather than evolving. We're seeing a move away from globalism to tribalism, a resurgence in fundamentalism, displacement of people, and abuse of humans by other humans. Are we hearing about it more? Has it always been like this in our recent history? Or is something happening to create this division?

Riane Eisler:

It's a combination. Certainly, we're

hearing about it more. I mean, it used to be that violence against women and children was ignored frankly, even here in the United States. If there was what they like to call domestic violence - I call it intimate violence - all the police did, if they were called, was just walk the guy around the block so he could go back home and do it again. Right. So that is part of the forward movement. We are also in the midst of what I call a massive regression to the domination side of the partnership domination social scale. And all of the things that you mentioned are part of that

then my native Austria. So, this new book addresses this, very front of the end, and the four cornerstones that it ends with are essential if we are to have the foundations that will avoid these regressions.

Sandie Sedgbeer: When I finished reading your book, I went to Wikipedia and started looking at the statistics for school shootings. I was shocked to see that records existed back to 1840, and I counted all of the school shootings in this century, the 21st century.

Your research demonstrates that the tragic shootings of the past several years may very well stem from the impact of growing up in a dominate domination culture or family that supports these rigid top-down rankings and is held together by fear and force. Would you tell us a little bit about the differences between the domination culture and a partnership culture?

Riane Eisler:

When I embarked on my

research, which was really to understand why there are so much violence and so much injustice, it became very clear that using the conventional social categories, like right versus left, religious versus secular, eastern versus western, northern versus southern, and so on, are useless in terms of answering that question. If you think about it, there have been violent, repressive regimes in all these

regression. They're not isolated. They're not

categories. But one thing that’s very different

random. They are part of a pattern. Real history is

about the new categories between the

not linear. You know, this whole notion of the

partnership and domination systems and these

linear movement from quote “barbarism” to quote

old categories is that the old categories

“civilization,” is nonsense. Yes; if you look at the

either ignore or marginalize the status

European Middle Ages and you look at today,

of the majority of humanity, women, and

there's been tremendous forward movement.

children. And they focus primarily on what I

Sometimes I say it as a joke, that when I get

call the top of the domination, pyramid

depressed about what's happening, I think of the European Middle Ages.

politics and economics as conventionally defined.

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But it's in families, as you said, Sandie, that children first learn what is normal or abnormal, possible or impossible, a moral, they're taught, right? And in domination families, children are taught that using violence, physical discipline against children is all right. Or they observe violence against their mothers and think that's okay, that's moral. So, what do they learn? That it's okay to use violence to impose your will. And this is a basic list for maintaining domination systems and it’s also a basic lesson for what it means to be a man. I mean, notice that these shootings are

But after reading your book, I now under what a domination culture and environment do to a child's brain and to its chemistry. Tell us about some of the science that backs up what you're saying?

Riane Eisler:

The science is very clear, and

unfortunately, the way these studies are usually reported is just concerning a particular individual or family. But, looking at them from a larger social perspective is eye-opening.

Because I’ll back up for a second.

almost exclusively men and young men, and they have been socialized to not be like a woman,

It's really not coincidental that the

right? Which means soft, caring, nonviolence care,

subordination of women is key to all these

and caregiving. They're not supposed to be that

repressive violence societies. Â Whether it's

way. And the gun in the United States, of course,

religious fundamentalists like Isis or religious

is a symbol of manhood, isn't it?

fundamentalists right here in the United States, whether it's secular

So, put all of that together. But I think that if we

societies like Hitler's Germany or Stalin's former

really were to look at these shootings, and at the

Soviet Union, or Kim Jong-un from North Korea.

shooters, there was a lot of pain in every one of

They're made of the same cloth. You know

their backgrounds. And it's the deflection of that anger, which they can't express against the adults who cause it, right? And that is characteristic of domination in a group versus other group-thinking.

Whether it's Sunni versus Shia, or Shia versus Sunni, in the Middle East, or white against dark skin, racist, in the United States, doesn't matter. It's part of the domination system, and it has its roots in the family, but the family does not arise in isolation. It's interactive, with other social institutions, religion, politics, economics, education. So, you have to look at societies, not in

linguistic psychologists tell us that the categories provided by a culture really channel our thinking. And this is why I cannot emphasize enough the importance of looking at the whole picture and starting to use these new categories which identify configurations and connections. Still, to get to your question about the neuroscience, one thing that we are learning is that it's not only our feelings and our beliefs but actually what children experience and observe early on, that leaves an imprint on the brain itself. And what we're learning is domination systems.

terms of simple linear causes and effects. Still, in

foundational parent-child and gender relations as

I think of them as real trauma factories, stress factories; children learn to either fight

most studies and sociology courses still do, you

or flight, or go into addiction, which is a form

can't see the whole picture, can you? And you

of flight. And the thing that really happens is

can't see the connections. You cannot connect

denial - whether it's a denial of climate change

the dots.

or denial of the parents, on whom you are

terms of interactions and if you leave out the

dependent for life, that is causing you pain, and

Sandie Sedgbeer: A few years ago, when Isis was at its height and on the news all the time, I heard a story about a member of Isis who killed his mother. I don't remember why he killed her, but I was shocked, and I could not believe how somebody could kill their mother.

learning to deflect instead that pain and rage and anger to outgroups. What we are learning from neuroscience is the importance of the environment, which for humans, of course, is our cultural environments.

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To heal ourselves we also have to heal society Riane Eisler

Riane Eisler: This whole notion of nature or nurture is a

I'm so glad you brought that up because

for one thing, I have a great passion for this work, and I

non-issue. The issue is gene expression.

a great deal of that is, of course, rooted in my

For example, one study showed that

experience as a refugee child, as an immigrant with my

there's a certain gene that some men have

parents from the Nazi era. I grew up in the industrial

which predisposes them to be violent.

slums of Havana because, of course, the Nazis

However, only those men who in their

confiscated everything - that's an official word for

childhood had what we call adverse

armed robbery. They took everything my parents had. So,

childhood experiences turned out to be

until my parents got on their feet.

violent. So, there is no such thing really as

and other traumatic stuff, really unjust. I mean, in Cuba

genetic determinism. It's always the

at that time under Batista, the gaps between the haves

interaction with the culture. Â

Sandie Sedgbeer: You are the president of the Center for Partnership Studies, and you've addressed the United Nations General Assembly, the US Department of State, and have conducted congressional briefings.

You've authored over 500 articles, you grew up, as you mentioned earlier, in Nazi Europe, during the war. What was it like for you to escape the horrors and the humiliations of Nazi Europe only to find that the promised land of American Liberty and Equality had its own problems with prejudice & persecution?

I experienced poverty

and have nots were simply enormous. But when we came to the United States, the promised land, one of the things we found, was, of course, racism. In Florida, at that time, there still was strict segregation.

I don't know

whether my father was the first one to decide to do a sit-in or whether he just didn't understand English well enough. Still, he sat in the colored section of a drugstore, and he was told to leave. And he said, ‘No, I'm sitting here, this is a good place to sit.’ But it was really rather horrifying to see extreme poverty, again, the gaps between the haves and have not, and this time based on race. Now I understand that this is part of what I call the domination system. And we had come by this because we inherited it. In The Chalice the Blade and again in Nurturing our Humanity, there is data - and by now it's really such incredibly incontrovertible data that for millennia we lived in societies that were more egalitarian, more gender-balanced.

OMTIMES.COM

Archaeologists, who excavated one of the

Our politics and economics are conventionally

largest early farming societies found no signs in

defined, but it's the foundational parent and child

the DNA of evidence that being born male or

contender relations that these regressions keep

female made any difference in terms of status or life options. But then there was a shift. What I called in The Chalice and the Blade a 5,000year domination detour. And we've inherited a lot of traditions of domination. In fact, if you look at the modern, progressive social

rebuilding - the domination system. Why was it a top priority for Hitler to return to a “traditional family," which is a code for an authoritarian, rigidly male-dominated, highly punitive family? Why is that a top priority for say, ISIS, or for the Taliban?

movements, every last one of them, they're not

Why historically, do we see this connection?

random and disconnected. They've all

Because we need to look at it. But our problem is

challenged traditions of domination, whether it

this - out of 1600 years of so-called modern

was challenging the so-called divinely ordained

western science, only 50 years ago did women's

right of kings to rule over their subjects, or the

studies, men's studies, gender studies, queer

so-called divinely ordained right of men to rule over the women and children in their homes; or again, the so-called divinely ordained right of a "superior race" to rule over an "Inferior one," all the way to the environmental movements.

studies even enter the university, and it's still marginalized, right? Our social categories leave this out. Most studies leave it out. Our educational and child development studies leave it out. It's still taught, when it's taught at all, as sort of siloed in

Nurturing our Humanity has all of the hard data

with families or with child development rather than

to really document that most of these

as part of sociology, political science, and

movements have only focused on dismantling of

economics. And that's what this book does.

what I call the top of the domination pyramid.

Sandie Sedgbeer: Yes, it does. It is such a thought-provoking book. I have lived in America for 20 years, just recently returned to live in England. And, over the last few years, since Trump was elected, I've watched people that I never thought would behave in an authoritarian manner, do exactly that. And I've been shocked and surprised by that. It always confuses me why people are so easily subjugated; why they conform so readily to authority. And as I was reading your book, I happened to receive something by an astrologer who was commenting on the same thing and referenced how, in his book The Function of the Orgasm, Wilhelm Reich explained how authoritarian government structures take over, and how it usually starts with suppressing sexuality.

Riane Eisler: I think Wilhelm Reich was amazingly

where I again referred to the issue – it’s domination economics versus an economic system that gives visibility and value to the work of caring for people starting in early childhood and caring for our Mother Earth, which neither capitalism nor socialism does, by the way. It's really within the struggle of all these types of societies as we think of them, between the domination elements, and the partnership elements. And once we understand that, we can be far, far more effective.

Sandie Sedgbeer: You've already talked about how we need to promote the partnership configuration to build a more equitable, caring, and sustainable future.

And the first step in constructing the foundations for this partnership future starts with four interactive, mutually-supporting cornerstones. Tell us about those.

ahead of his time. My book, Sacred Pleasure,

Riane Eisler:

which re-examined sexuality and spirituality,

one is childhood. We need to really take note of

explored how they were once really connected.

what we know from neuroscience that nothing

But what Reich got wrong was that in men,

less than how people's brains develop. So, we

sexuality is not suppressed. It is distorted. It is women's sexuality that is suppressed. That's a big difference. In Nurturing our Humanity, I go back to one of the points I made in Sacred Pleasure, which is that in domination systems, we have the eroticization of domination and violence. It is really like Pavlov's dogs, it’s part of our socialization, and it's very, very harmful. But, none

We've touched on them, the first

know that what children first experience and observe is very different in domination or partnership environments. In a domination environment, children learn early on to equate differences. Beginning with the difference in form between the male and female form of our species with superiority or inferiority, with dominating or being dominated, with being served or serving.

of this is inevitable. Whether it's “original sin” or “selfish genes,” religion and secular theories are at odds, but really, they're telling the same story -

That's a template that's implanted in a child's brain before the brain is developed, much less

We're bad. We have to be controlled from the top,

our cognitive and critical faculties. Right? And

right?

then it can be applied to every difference:

One of the chapters in Nurturing our Humanity

racial, religious, it doesn't really matter. It's the

explains that it's not between right and

ingroup versus the outer group. And it's really

left, or between religious and secular, or between

rooted in that agenda, but we have a gender

socialism and capitalism. I wrote a whole book

system of values, and that's something that

about that, called The Real Wealth of Nations,

we've got to unpack and understand. I mean, why is there always money for prisons?

OMTIMES.COM

So, we need, but we haven't had economics that

I can tell you why, it's the stereotype of the

really supports caring for people starting in

punitive father, right? The punitive head of household. Or there's always money for weapons and wars. So that's another domination, masculine stereotype, the hero as a killer. But somehow there isn't enough money for caring for people's health, for caring for children, for keeping a clean and healthy environment. You know, for both Adam Smith, the father of capitalism and Karl Marx, the father of socialist theory, that was just

childhood, caring for our mother earth. And you know, there are trends in this direction, which is very exciting. But there are, of course, oppositions.

The nations that have moved most to the partnership side, modern nations like Sweden, Finland, and Norway, they're not perfect, but at the beginning of the 20th century, they were poor, there were famines. And today they're invariably in the highest ranks of the World Economic Forum's

reproductive women's work, right? So, it's devalued. And once we understand that, we can really stop devaluing it because it's what really makes for better lives. And at this point, if we don't take care of nature, our children have no future.

Global competitiveness reports. They have a generally high standard of living, far less poverty, far less crime, and they also have more gender equity. They have policies where caring is voted

Sandie Sedgbeer: Absolutely. Let's talk about some of those other cornerstones. I mean, you've got gender relations, economic relations, and narratives and language

for by both men and women because the status of

Riane Eisler:

need for our post-industrial age. This country, the

Well, I already started a little

talking about economics, because whether it's neoliberal capitalism, you know, so-called

women, of the feminine, has risen. So, they have universal health care, and very generous paid parental leave for both mothers and fathers.

Parenting education, elder care with dignity, very high-quality early childhood education, which we

United States, is going to pay very dearly if we don't change rapidly and start investing in highquality human capital. You know, that economists

trickle-down economics, which is really, domination economics is what’s really going on. You can see it in feudal times when people were supposed to content themselves with scraps dropping from the opulent tables of

tell us is essential for our knowledge, service age, flexible people who are resilient, who can work in teams, who can adjust to change, including a rapid technological change that largely hinges on the quality of care and education children receive

those on top. Whether it was an ancient Chinese emperor or an Arab sheik, there with

early on.

this feudalism.It's all domination economics.

And you can have it in socialism too. You know, the two mass applications of socialism in the former Soviet Union and China, very violent

We have introduced a new metric, a new, it’s in my books, but the social wealth, an index is something that we are developing now; that we can show policymakers - what the state of human capacity

regimes with terrible environmental problems. You see it today, even in China.

But the point of it is we need to move forward and leave behind that gender system of values to an economic system that recognizes that the real wealth of a nation, of our world, is not financial. You know, like the stock market going up and down. Uh, it consists of the

development is and what investments make for a better or a worse state. You know, the United States, not coincidentally, has the highest child poverty, the highest maternal mortality, and the highest infant mortality rate of any developed nation. Yeah, it does less than half of what other developed nations do in terms of family support.

contributions of people and of nature.

OMTIMES.COM

We urgently need an integrated progressive political agenda if we are to have foundations for a more equitable, sustainable, caring world.

Riane Eisler Sandie Sedgbeer: You were talking about some of the cultures that have turned themselves around and created a partnership system, and it's working pretty well for the most part. There are other cultures that you write about in the book that have had these peace systems, just as a way of being and living, and they haven't changed, and even though they're not perfect, they give us great hope. Ultimately, it's governments that are going to make these changes, but what can we do as individuals. To spur these changes along.

Riane Eisler: Well, I think that joining the partnership movement, and the first step in that is changing our consciousness. For example, Nurturing our Humanity provides evidence that the evolution of love played a major role in the

I mean, it's really all about the last cornerstone: story and language. Because what, again, and again comes through when you read my work is that we've been told the wrong story and us humans live by stories. So, starting to tell the story that's backed up by the fact of what really is a partnership configuration. It's not coincidental that in Sweden, Finland, and Norway, half of the national legislature is female. And as the status of women rises, men no longer feel it's such a threat to their status, to their “masculinity” to also embrace and vote for more caring policies. So, understanding is changing our consciousness. Then also educating ourselves so that we can each be a leader in the partnership movement. And we, at the Center for Partnership Studies, have webinars and courses online. You can go to the centerforpartnership.org and find out about them,

emergence of humanity. This is just simply not part

and about our social wealth economic indicators. If

of what we're being taught. We have evidence

you are particularly interested in changing

that the default for humans – and we know this

economics, join one of our courses. Talk to your

from biological and social science - is not

legislature about it. Talk to the organizations you

domination and violence, but caring, sharing, and

belong to about what we need, and how what we

nonviolence. Becoming aware of this, and helping

do or do not measure makes a difference.

to change the consciousness of other people is a very important step.

2019 | DECEMBER ISSUE OMTIMES

OMTIMES Magazine And these metrics show the enormous economic value of the work of caring for people starting in childhood and caring for our planet. So, these are the first steps. If you are in a position of authority, introduce a bill to have your state legislature help to develop and adopt the social wealth index, support bills that are so often marginalized as just women's issues, like paid parental leave. We only have about four states now that have them. This is ridiculous. We have to have them nationally. People need to understand the reality, like the studies on adverse childhood experiences. We can do something about it. We can have parenting classes in high schools.

There's so much that you can do depending on just where you are, but it really starts with leaving behind the old categories and starting to connect the dots.

Sandra Sedgbeer: You have provided a beautiful blueprint in nurturing humanity, but how confident are you that humanity will reach that place within itself where it elects to follow your blueprint?

Riane Eisler: Well, it's an existential commitment, isn't it? We just simply make the commitment, because if we don't do anything, there's no chance, is there? So, we have to. Am I confident? No, I don't have a crystal ball. I don't know what's going to happen, but I do know that the domination system is really toxic. It's toxic to our species, it's toxic to individuals, it's toxic to men, to women, to children, and it doesn't have to be this way.

And once we understand that there is a partnership alternative and that we do have the blueprint for building it, starting with these four cornerstones, then we can really make it happen. And it won't be easy, but it can be done. You know, human cultures are human creations for goodness sakes. We can recreate them. Not to go back to any so-called good

I pray for a world where we live in partnership rather than domination;

old days but using the best of technology that we have. Because it isn't the technology, it's what kind of values guide it, right?

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Riane Eisler: I'm so glad you brought this up because one of the things people can do by going to the In moving towards the partnership side, it’ll never be ideal, but our default, as I said, is not domination and violence, but carrying, sharing, and non-violence. There is a study I can tell you about where people's pleasure centers in the brain light up more when they share rather than when they win.

centerforpartnership.org is to listen to some of our old videos. But, to get back to that particular video, in The Chalice and the Blade, the title really is symbolic of two ways of looking at power, isn't it?

The Blade is power over, right? Appropriate for the domination system, the power to control, to dominate, to take life. But there's also another power. It's power with and power to, or the Chalice as a power to not only give life but to nurture and to

Sandie Sedgbeer: Yes. We're much happier when we are helping others and engage in selfless acts.

illuminate life. So, just being a woman doesn't make

Riane Eisler: And, now finally, science is

Nurturing our Humanity, How Domination,

beginning to look not just at pathology and violence, which I was obsessed with because that's what’s “important” in domination systems. But looking at love, looking at helpfulness, the studies are very clear as you said, people are happier, and it's reflected in their brain. Neurochemistry.

Sandra Sedgbeer: I noticed a video on your website. You took part in an interactive Webinar in 2018, "Power with and Power through - How women Lead Differently for a Just and Caring World.” Tell us about that. What does it really look like to do power differently?

you a partnership leader; men can be partnership leaders, too.

Partnerships Shape our Brains, Lives, and Future by Riane Eisler and Douglas P. Fry is published by Oxford University Press.

Riane Eisler is a social systems scientist, cultural historian, and attorney whose research, writing, and speaking has transformed the lives of people worldwide. She is President of the Center for Partnership Studies (CPS) and Editor-in-Chief of the Interdisciplinary Journal of Partnership Studies. A refugee from Nazi Europe as a child, she has addressed the UN General Assembly, the US Department of State and Congressional Briefings, and authored over 500 articles published in outlets including The Christian Science Monitor, Human Rights Quarterly, and International Journal of Women's Studies. Her book The Chalice and The Blade: Our History, Our Future, is an international bestseller.

www.rianeeisler.com and www.centerforpartnership.org

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Health & Wellness Innovative new approaches to Healing as well as holistic methods for dealing with health issues and personal growth

Battling Infertility and Increasing Your Chances to Conceive Naturally In your 40’s

By Carrie Rutledge

There is nothing more painful than to want a baby and to be told you can’t have one.

There are or course, very rare circumstances in which there is a genetic or immune malfunction that may need doctor intervention; however, most infertility diagnoses are “unexplained.” If you fall into the “unexplained” category, I’m here to tell you that you can have a baby without doctor intervention, naturally, on your terms. Whether it’s your age or your partner’s sperm that is playing a role in your inability to conceive, we are given everything we need in nature to reverse infertility and give birth to a healthy baby, until menopause.

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One of the best books on the market discussing infertility is called “It Starts With The Egg,” written by Rebecca Fett.

She will tell you to start by throwing the traditional American food pyramid away because not everybody needs two servings of dairy a day or six servings grain.

In fact, by eliminating sugar in all forms from your diet, you will see a drastic change in your health. A low glycemic diet is key to lowering inflammation and increasing egg quality.

The optimal fertility diet should include high amounts of organic, grass-fed meats, eggs, nuts, seeds, and vegetables.

Carbohydrates from sweet potatoes and squash instead of rice or grains will supply you with loads of energy without spiking your blood sugar.

The fruit is healthy and delicious but still loaded with fructose, and unfortunately our bodies don’t understand the difference between a piece of fruit or a candy bar.

The sugar is processed the same way in our bodies. The goal is to

keep blood sugar from spiking; therefore, if you must eat fruit, stick to organic berries, apples, and pears. Paying attention to eating fruit in combination with quality fat and protein. A wonderful option to zap those sugar and chocolate cravings is through smoothies. A cup of organic berries, a whole avocado, almond butter, and raw cacao is an excellent dessert that you can eat every day for a quick boost.

Supplements, in addition to a healthy diet, are crucial to egg and sperm health as well as building your own reserve of nutrients for when you do conceive.

During the first few months of pregnancy, the baby will feed on the yolk sack.

What you eat before conception is critical for preventing miscarriage and ensuring healthy fetal development. A quality prenatal vitamin containing folate (instead of folic acid) is essential. Thorne is a brand of supplements that come highly recommended by most Naturopathic Doctors and are highly absorbable by the body. Thorne Methyl-Guard is a combination of folate, B-12, and Omtimes.com

B-6, all crucial for preventing miscarriage especially in women who have the MTHFR gene and are unable to absorb folic acid.

Vitamin D is not a vitamin; it is actually a hormone and is extremely important in trying to conceive. In fact, all IVF doctors will check your levels before moving forward with treatment.

Most of us are deficient because we are told to wear sunscreen on virtually every part of our bodies. This is one of the worst things we can do for our infertility, our immune system, and our mental health.

Dr. Mercola is one of my favorite health column writers, and he will tell you that he lives in a climate in which he can soak up vitamin D all year round.

Exposing large portions of the body to the sun for twenty minutes a day (depending on skin tone) is one of the best things you can do to maximize Vitamin D levels.

Other supplements that are extremely helpful in the conception process are: 200400 mg of CoQ10 (Ubiquinol for absorption) for egg quality; Omtimes.com

nascent Iodine which aids in removing toxins; Black Cohosh on days 1-14 of your cycle will ensure a strong uterine lining; calcium and magnesium to prevent morning sickness once you are pregnant; a natural progesterone cream from days 14-28. Sometimes just adding progesterone cream is enough!

In fact, the only pregnancy that stuck for me was the one in which my NP doctor prescribed a natural progesterone cream tailored to my body.

Lastly, in terms of supplements, I strongly recommend Juice Plus.

For some reason these little capsules reduce inflammation in the body and the only times I conceived, both my husband and I were taking them. Likewise, Dr. Odom completed a study in Mississippi comparing mothers who took Juice Plus during pregnancy and those who didn’t.

He found that delivery before 37 weeks was 0% versus 20%, preeclampsia was 0% versus 21%, and admission to NICU was 0% versus 10%. You can’t go wrong with these little capsules before and during pregnancy.

Toxins are everywhere and are a big contributor to fertility issues.

All forms of toxins are to be avoided as much as possible. This means pharmaceutical drugs and vaccines (especially during pregnancy), pain medications, fluoridated water, plastic containers, cleaners, detergents, bleach, perfume, nail salons and polish, receipt paper, and makeup.

The list goes on and on. If you take steps to reduce these body pollutants in your life, you will drastically increase your health and hormone balance. Invest in a water filter for your household that filters out fluoride. We recently hear more about the dangers of fluoride from the mainstream media; however, holistic practitioners have been warning us for years. Replace all makeup with brands such as Juice Beauty or Tarte or any brand that doesn’t use phthalates (artificial fragrance) or parabens. Nail polish and unventilated salons are very toxic, and it is recommended to avoid them completely or find well-ventilated organic salons.

Finally, working with an NP doctor who can monitor your hormones and nutrient levels as well as a reputable acupuncturist can do wonders for you physically and spiritually. Taking your physical wellbeing into your own hands is

incredibly empowering and lifechanging. Treating root causes instead of masking problematic symptoms will leave you with a greater sense of self.

In today’s society, we are bombarded with marketing firms, pharmaceutical companies, and physicians who make more money when we are sick or infertile. It makes sense that they want to keep society at their disposal.

Even if you choose to go the IVF route, making these changes in your life will ensure you a more successful outcome, a healthier pregnancy, and a healthy baby at the end of a life-changing journey.

Carrie is a full-time working mother who spent five years struggling with infertility and miscarriages. She finally decided to take her own health into her hands. Through hours of endless research and lifestyle changes, she was able to put an end to frustrating doctor’s visits and expensive pharmaceutical drugs that worsened her condition.

At forty she was able to give birth to a healthy baby girl and is now devoting her time to helping other women take back their health and conceive on their own terms.

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Simply Spiritual To perceive reality from a different perspective is to open oneself to the wonders and unlimited wealth of creation. Simply Spiritual offers the opportunity to visit new places, new methods, and different ways to perceive the vast human knowledge of our Universe.

As the year comes to a close, we all scurry to welcome the New Year carrying with us the baggage of our past.

What if instead we hugged our past goodbye and

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tried something different to find peace in our lives?

Witnessing, or Sakshibhav Meditation works with believers and nonbelievers alike. The daily practice of this meditation has empowered many from around the world to step back from an external event, a thought attack from inside, any physical ailment, or psychological imbalance to enter a state of equilibrium; being aware of it all and not getting engaged or identified with it.

All our suffering begins the moment we get unconsciously involved with the thought process and emotional patterns and take it personally. This meditation gives us the scope to just witness it happening in the biological or mental screen while not participating. We see it all as if it were colored clouds passing over the inner space of our mind-body, where we are the clear blue sky that remains ever unscathed.

“Yesterday is but today’s memory, and tomorrow is today’s dream” –Kahlil Gibran As we approach the New Year 2020, let’s give a big hug goodbye to all the memories of our yesterdays that taught us the transitory nature of our peripheral life and the benefits of our abiding in a soulful life. Let’s live today as if today is the first and the last day of our life so that it releases us from the dream state so we can enter the awakened state, where we witness life in its fullness, in its totality.

Witnessing, as an art and practice of awareness, helps us release all that binds and minces us in the very grinder of our own mind, stuck with unresolved problems or hurtful memories of the past.

Whatever we resist or react to, that very situation or person keeps robbing us of our inner peace. Even if a million other things go right in our life, time, and again we are drawn into that piercing thought

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pattern that only makes us feel so vulnerable and helpless!

These certain relationships or other patterns of external life are so stubborn that however much we fight and invest our emotions, we feel more and more tired and depressed.

How do we get out of these challenging situations of our inner and outer environment?

Witnessing, or Sakshibhav Meditation works with believers and nonbelievers alike.

The daily practice of this meditation has empowered many from around the world to step back from an external event, a thought attack from inside, any physical ailment, or psychological imbalance to enter a state of equilibrium; being aware of it all and not getting engaged or identified with it. All our suffering begins the moment we get unconsciously involved with the thought process and emotional patterns and take it personally. That is the agony part! This meditation gives us the scope to just witness it happening in the biological Omtimes.com

or mental screen while not participating. We see it all as if it were colored clouds passing over the inner space of our mind-body, where we are the clear blue sky that remains ever unscathed.

When we move inward, quietly witnessing our mind, surfing our breaths, and surrendering to the moment, we are the Sakshi, the witness, of the magic of life in its natural state!

But when we get obsessed with thoughts of some golden time in the future while losing the opportunities that the present moment gifts us, we forget that our Self is not out there, but in the stillness of our witnessing mind.

Therefore, we need to be mindful to be here and now.

To be Sakshi, the Witness. To be that love and compassion that we are. Mindfulness is to be here and now, not in some past memories or future worries. Mindfulness is to do one thing at a time with loving attention, enjoying the doing as if it is done through

us, and as the non-doer, witnessing it being done!

As we practice Sakshibhav meditation, our brain learns to handle one thing at a time. Many times situations arise, and we are stuck with a problem of indecisiveness.

Often decisions taken in haste create unpleasant consequences. All these situations remind us of the deep need for a culture of concentration and attention.

From the crowd state we come to a calm state of mind. From an unconscious life of default we move to awakened consciousness.

Thus Sakshibhav meditation is awakening to a divine life on earth. The peaceful life of love and harmony for all.

The daily practice of this meditation gives us mastery over our uncontrolled behavior. Yes, old habits do persist, but they do not consume us. The practice of awareness keeps us rooted in the present and not imprisoned in the past.

We gradually grow out of the need for judgment and

reactivity. A calm, witnessing mind is always loving and compassionate. And only a calm, witnessing mind can grant us the boon of happiness and peace.

Let 2020 be a year of our commitment to live a higher life, not repeating the past, but learning from it.

Through Sakshibhav meditation practice, let us live life to the fullest and create a happy future for ourselves and all others on this beautiful planet Mother Earth.

Bodhi Shuddhaanandaa (formerly Shuddhaanandaa Brahmachari, India): Globally acclaimed spiritual teacher with 40 years of meditation experience, author, and visionary social advocate; founded Lokenath Divine Life Mission, 1985, which serves thousands of poverty-stricken individuals. Received Lifetime Achievement Award, House of Lords, UK, 2015. www.courseinmindfulness.com

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Messages That Are Heaven Scent

By John Holland

There are many different types of symbols and messages that those in Spirit can send us. One of the more common ways our loved ones

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can communicate with us is through our sense of smell.

Scents have an amazing power to vividly bring back memories that we may have long forgotten. When we smell a freshly baked apple pie, it may bring up loving memories of a grandmother, or the smell of the ocean could conjure up memories of happy days spent on your dad’s boat.

Stop and think for a minute right now what scents bring back special memories for you. Mine would have to be the aroma of my mom’s Italian cooking, which brings back memories of Mom, giving us samples as she cooked.

All too often, these signs are quite subtle. For example, if your dad used to smoke cigars in his lifetime and one day for no reason, you smell cigar smoke, don’t be alarmed.

Obviously, check that there’s no one in the house actually smoking a cigar. If

not, then it might be your dad’s way of saying, “I just wanted to let you know that I’m here with you.”

During one of my winter lectures about recognizing communications from the Other-Side, a young woman in the audience raised her hand. “My mom passed away a few years ago. She was always working in her garden, and her neighbors all admired her spectacular flowers. In fact, she won several ribbons for her roses.”

Then this young woman told us that on the anniversary of her mom’s passing a few days before this event, she woke up to find her entire house filled with the sweet smell of roses.

I asked her to come up on stage. As I placed her face in my hands and looked into her tearful eyes, I asked her, “Darling, so what do you think that was?”

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I thought the answer was almost a given, but what she said next surprised me.

“I just thought it was the Glade Air Freshener coming in from one of my neighbors!”

Trying not to embarrass her, I replied: “You mean to tell me that on the anniversary of your mom’s passing—a woman known for her prize roses—your whole house fills with the scent of roses during a snowstorm! You honestly think that an air freshener could travel from one house to another, through two sets of doubleglazed storm windows and fill your house with that smell?”

“Well, John, I didn’t know what else to think,” she said, still struggling with her belief in communications from the Other-Side. I just gave her a huge hug.

“That was most likely your mom saying, I’m here with

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you today, and I love you so very much,” I said. She walked off stage with a smile that radiated through the entire auditorium, clearly beginning to believe that this was a clear gift from her mom.

JOHN’S MESSAGE It’s fascinating to me how often we try to rationalize every experience. Not everything is explainable, especially when we’re talking about the ways our loved ones send us validations. I genuinely believe that those on the Other-Side, given a chance, will never miss a good party!

So, remember, just because their soul is no longer in a physical body, doesn’t mean they’re not stopping by occasionally to let you know that they still care. Have you received a message through a familiar scent from a loved one who passed? If so, please share your story on my Facebook page

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Relax…

Let your worries drift away into the moment…

OMTimes is a free publication and can be delivered right to your inbox…

Subscribe at: Free OMTimes Subscription Visit our website at: www.omtimes.com

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OM Living For those living a more Conscious Lifestyle

How to Quiet the Mind Through Yoga

by Rachelle Wilber

If you are coping with troubling thoughts each day, then begin using yoga methodologies to quiet your mind. Yoga is one of the oldest forms of exercise, but it

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is also used for improving the condition of the mind. Here is how yoga can help you to feel calmer.

Centering the Mind Centering the mind is necessary to quiet the mind, and this requires having a special place for your yoga practice. Choose a space that doesn’t have any distractions that can keep you from focusing. You may need to close the windows in the room to avoid hearing the noises from outside. Some experts suggest that you perform yoga in a dimly lit room. Have a soft rug or blanket to sit and recline on while you are performing your yoga postures.

Deep Breathing Techniques During yoga, controlling your breathing is essential so that you can quiet your mind. By expelling the air that is in your lungs, you are eliminating the toxins from this organ. This process can involve deep or shallow breathing techniques to help you clear the stressful thoughts from your mind.

Focus Your Thoughts Yoga teacher training will help you learn more about focusing your thoughts. You can enroll in a class with a knowledgeable yoga practitioner who will begin by helping you to choose a mantra. By saying a mantra to yourself repetitively, you can clear the troubling thoughts from your mind. Beginners can often only clear the mind for a few seconds, but with practice, it is possible to empty the mind for several minutes.

Quiet Music Meditation For many individuals, listening to quiet music while performing a yoga routine is essential. This is often instrumental music that has no words so that you can overcome the difficult thoughts that are in your mind.

Having a CD player in your yoga exercise area is vital so that you can turn on the music quickly to listen to it.

Special Yoga Postures There are certain yoga postures that are recommended for

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clearing the mind. These poses often require saluting the sun or sitting quietly with the eyes closed. During these postures, you may focus on looking at the sky, or alternatively, you might close your eyes to center your thoughts.

You might not think that quieting the mind is helpful, but research reveals that it can eliminate stress along with improving your emotional stability. Additional benefits include improving your memory and increasing your self-awareness.

Rachelle Wilber is a freelance writer living in the San Diego, California area. She graduated from San Diego State University with her Bachelor’s Degree in Journalism and Media Studies. She tries to find an interest in all topics and themes, which prompts her writing. When she isn’t on her porch writing in the sun, you can find her shopping, at the beach, or at the gym. Follow her on Twitter and Facebook: @RachelleWilber; https://www. facebook.com/profile. php?id=100009221637700 Omtimes.com

Benefits of the Sudarshan Kriya Breathing Technique

by Patti Montella

Have you ever noticed that every emotion has a corresponding rhythm of breath? When you’re nervous or anxious, you tend to hold your breath. When you’re stressed, you might let out a long exhale or sigh.

The rhythm of our breath indicates what’s going on in our nervous system. A smooth, light, and fine rhythm of breath means the mind is more at peace. Amid your workday, sometimes stop, Omtimes.com

close your eyes, and notice the rhythm of your breath.

A few minutes spent like this can-do wonder for your nervous system.

I come from a corporate background that was very demanding. It wasn’t until I started studying the Sudarshan Kriya breathing technique that I noticed how often I was holding my breath. What I learned is that when our negative

emotions—fear, loneliness, anxiety, anger, or shame— don’t have a release valve, it’s like having a kink in the hose.

Water can’t flow right, and things can get backed up in a hurry.

Daily breathwork, whether it’s Sudarshan Kriya (SKY) or some other practice, has many positive benefits. I’ll share those benefits, along with my story of approaching this practice as a slight skeptic, but let’s first dig deeper into the SKY technique.

What is the Sudarshan Kriya breathing technique?

Quite simply, the SKY breathing technique involves rhythmic circles of breath that have a positive impact on the body, mind, and spirit. In fact, the translation from Sanskrit makes it obvious the impact of this technique. “Su” means proper, “darshan” means vision, and “Kriya” means purifying action. To put it all together, Sudarshan Kriya provides “a proper vision of one’s self through a purifying action,” which is the breath.

This breathing technique brings harmony and balance between our body, mind, and spirit, while safely releasing those negative emotions discussed earlier.

The physical benefits alone are numerous: it lowers the cortisol levels in our brain (the stress hormone), enhances brain activity, lowers blood pressure, and strengthens the immune system.

Our breath is our main source of energy. A breathing technique like SKY is designed to increase our prana, or life energy, which can become depleted with chronic stress, too much thinking, unhealthy food, and a lack of sleep. Increasing the prana in our system makes us feel more alive, more energized, healthier, more self-aware, and more connected with ourselves and others. It flushes out the stress and toxins that accumulate and returns us to the natural rhythm of our body, mind, and spirit.

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Learning SKY as a skeptic Before learning the SKY technique, I had a long career in corporate America. After several years, I was feeling burned out and disillusioned.

When a close friend died, and I went through a tough divorce, the time had come for me to make a change.

I was tired of spending so much time working just so I could pay the bills and have a vacation now and then. I felt strongly that there had to be much more to life than such a mundane level of existence.

As I later told people, I took a downgrade in my career to upgrade my quality of life and moved to Colorado. I was meeting with a client one day when she handed me a flyer for a workshop that would be teaching the SKY breathing technique. I’ll be the first to admit that I looked at a weekend workshop with some skepticism. After hundreds of training workshops during my years in corporate America, that was

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not my idea of fun.

What convinced me to sign up was the work I’d been doing on my own to manage my migraines through long, slow, and deep circles of breath.

The migraines had been running my life for years and seeing how breathing in a specific rhythm had helped to minimize that pain, I thought I’d give the workshop a try.

On the first night of the course, I was still a little on guard. But the next day, when I experienced the SKY breathing technique, I felt a state of rest, peace, joy, and clarity I’d never known. I was raised to approach the difficulties in life with an attitude of “buck up and keep going,” which was helpful in one regard, but it had also served to stifle my emotions. As I learned to breathe, I safely let go of the grief I had held onto for years over my friend’s death, my divorce, and also doubts about myself.

I thought I’d been dealing with that grief, but all along, it had been carving out a hole in my heart. The SKY breathing technique helped me to finally fill that hole. Coming out of that workshop, I felt strong, clear, and resilient. I realized that I didn’t want to be a hamster on the wheel anymore; I wanted to realize more happiness, more peace, more dynamism—just more in life.

The SKY breathing technique shifted my perception about a lot of things and helped me to realize the truth about what was important to me. It quickly improved my quality of life.

How this technique paid dividends in my job A few months after I learned this technique, I had a challenging product launch with a difficult boss.

Without warning, things started going in a direction I didn’t anticipate. It wasn’t the smooth experience I had been hoping for, and previously, that would’ve led

to disharmony in the office, some panic, and undoubtedly some late nights.

Thanks to the SKY technique, I was able to step back again and again, from the heat of the moment, and make good decisions with a clear intellect. My mind was much more often in the present moment due to regular breathwork, which improved my thinking and intuition and gave me the ability to express myself with strength, conviction, clarity of mind, and connection with others.

That bump in the road during our product launch—with all the people, personalities, and moving parts swirling around me—showed me that it was possible to move through life like water flowing around a rock. It worked out well for everyone, including me.

That’s when I truly realized two things. First, that something had changed in me. My approach to that issue was 180 degrees different from how I would’ve handled it in the past. Second, the

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benefits of the SKY breathing technique were living up to what my teachers had described. I knew I had to start sharing this technique with others.

How to begin a regular breathwork practice The Sudarshan Kriya breathing technique must be learned in the presence of a teacher over three days (just like my experience), but that doesn’t mean you can’t start a daily breathing practice right now.

In this video, you’ll see how stopping for just a few minutes, closing your eyes, and breathing in a particular pattern can settle your consciousness and your body.

I start my day with a regular routine of breathwork and meditation, but you can do this technique now.

As I always say to my students, “Be your own scientist.”

Observe your breath and get to know its rhythms. Are you holding your breath? Is your breath heavy? Is it light? Is it

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shaky? Sit for three minutes (or longer if you want) and just observe. When you open your eyes, you’ll find that your outer experience has changed for the better.

PATTI MONTELLA has been a pioneer, risk-taker, and leader her entire life. She built a thriving career on the cutting-edge of travel technology before leaving it all behind to dedicate her life to uplifting society. The skills she sharpened in the business world have served her well as an international speaker and inner transformation coach who’s taught tens of thousands of people worldwide—from CEOs and government leaders to royalty and college students—over the past twenty-five years. Through her work in key leadership roles with the Art of Living Foundation and the International Association for Human Values, Patti has become an internationally recognized happiness expert and a powerful agent of change.

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12 Ways to Boost Mind, Body, Spirit in 2020

By Robyn M Fritz

Why do New Year’s Resolutions fail? They take too long. In our hyper times, we’re constantly in flux, and slowing down for anything is to admit defeat—or die.

But what if you could both keep up with your busy life

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and slow down, so it all makes sense?

You can, and the holidays are a good time to start.

That means skipping one big New Year’s resolution in favor of a monthly mind, body, spirit task that will fine-tune your holistic life by year’s end.

The following are suggestions to boost your creativity. Progress doesn’t depend on the order, so listen to your intuition and soul as you go. And get a notebook to keep track of what you learn.

January: Be Present. Stop and breathe; notice the moments. Remember, you’re a complete being—body, mind, spirit. Notice how it feels to be balanced and learn to stay that way.

February: Understand energy. Yes, everything is energy, including you. Find a simple energy healing technique that you can do morning, night, and

whenever you need help to maintain your holistic focus. Here’s one simple exercise: cross your hands on your heart, imagine you’re breathing energy into your hands, hold your hands to your mouth and breathe on them as if your breath was energy, and put your hands back on your heart.

March: Learn how your intuition works. Everyone is innately an intuitive and healer. Now determine whether you’re clairseeing, clair-hearing, clairfeeling, clair-knowing, or a combination of these four main abilities. Then work them: keep a notebook of intuitive experiments; learn to distinguish between beliefs, emotions, facts, and intuition; and apply this practical skill daily. You will be astounded at how wellrounded you become.

April: Intention. Decide what you intend: how will you incorporate your intuition and healing skills at home and at work, or react

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to change, or choose to live in the world? Notice how intention changes your view of your loved ones and your efforts to be your best self.

May: Self-love. The biggest problem we all have is a lack of self-love. Learning to love yourself isn’t ego but acceptance of your pluses and minuses, of everything that makes you who you are (yes, warts and all). Be prepared for huge changes.

June: Ritual. Daily, weekly, and monthly rituals remind us that we are souls in human bodies who need concrete, visible reminders that we are greater than our busy lives. Ritual offers a time-out and a connection to family, friends, and the divine, adding peace and harmony to our lives.

July: Clear space. Learn to keep your spaces clear at home and at work. This isn’t decluttering; it’s removing stuck energy through simple energy-healing techniques.

It can involve keeping sea

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salt in bowls around the house, Himalayan salt lamps, lavender, essential oils, incense—whatever it takes to be aware of stuck energy around you and to keep it moving. Because stuck energy leads to overwhelm, depression, lack of selfworth, and everything that holds you back.

August: Mindset. Now that you’re honoring your whole self focus outward. Choose a mindset that helps you live in the world as it really exists—as a union of equals, where everything is alive, has a soul, consciousness, responsibilities, free choice, and opinions. The world will get bigger—and easier to live in because you’ll be in the flow.

September: Connect with All Life. Your inclusive mindset makes it easier to connect with our living planet and all its beings as you learn why you matter to the world and how your unique contribution can benefit all life. You’ll also

have amazing experiences relating to the world as a collaboration of equals. You will be less lonely, more awed, and growing your soul at warp speed, which is the whole point.

now is to keep at it. Practice daily. Build on what you learn. Remember, you’re a year into your new life.

What worked best? What held you back? What will you do next year? Why?

October: Mantra. You’ve covered the big things by now, so what do they mean to your new holistic life? Keep yourself going by creating mantras that remind you of your new choices. Quick phrases that keep you focused will also keep you grounded and balanced.

Relax into your year of growing into your best self.

It’s not a chore, not a haveto, nothing but your choice to play, experiment, and find a rhythm that adds meaning and balance to your busy life. Remember that you matter to the world, so let 2020 be the year that you believe that—and prosper.

November: Choice. Ready to create life-long habits?

Look over your notebook of experiments, mantras, rituals, ideas, feelings, interests, thoughts … your entire year of becoming your best self and decide how to make different elements part of your day, week, month, and year.

Robyn M Fritz MA MBA CHt hosts the OM Times radio show, “The Practical Intuitive: Mind Body Spirit for the Real World.” An intuitive and spiritual consultant and certified past life regression specialist, she is an award-winning author whose next book is “The Afterlife Is a Party: What People and Animals Teach Us About Love, Reincarnation, and the Other Side.” Find her at RobynFritz.com.

December: Practice. Guess what? You’ve established a new lifestyle. Your challenge

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The Journey from 3D to 5D 2020 is the year of balancing the Divine Feminine with the Divine Masculine so now Sophie is offering two Spiritual Life Coach Training Certifications. One that certifies women to become powerful Spiritual Life Coaches and another certification for men to become Spiritual Entrepreneurs & Life Coaches. Both courses offer a 16-week journey, which begins with a Spiritual Retreat in a tropical villa in West Palm Beach, and then moves into an online classroom.

The next Spiritual Entrepreneur & Life Coach Certification training for Men, starts January 18th, 2020 for a one-day retreat in West Palm Beach, FL. Spiritual Life Coach Certification for Women starts March 6-8, 2020 in West Palm Beach with the 3-day retreat.

www.AwakenwithSophie.com

Are We Being Reactive or Proactive?

by Crystal Presence

Life is filled with a plethora of experiences that can stimulate our reactivity. Moments in response to what someone says are often our most regretted moments. We strive to stay calm and listen to what the other has to say, yet sometimes find ourselves reacting in ways are sorry we did. We can choose to make a defensive comment, hold it back or be proactive with wise choices.

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The world of chemistry tells us that the more stable the reactant, the less reactive it will be. The more stable the reactant, the slower it will react. Interestingly enough this is often a metaphor for many of our own reactions. What if we take full responsibility for calming and taming the ways we react? What if we embrace our reactivity and cultivate a path to emotional sobriety?

8 tips on how to tame our reactivity and maintain our proactivity Cultivate the ability to maintain a state of release.

Notice when our breathing is slow and constricted. Bring awareness into any places we are holding back and not fully present in our bodies. Breathe, sing, vibrate, dance, meditate and explore what other ways we can move, circulate and stabilize our energy. Explore that natural place where we are centered, connected and seeing more clearly.

Change beliefs about maintaining our ability to be present. For example, the belief that we cannot help

being reactive, we are victims of our own condition. Our new belief can be that we have the power treat our reactivity like any other habit that we want to change. (1) Observe what triggers us. (2) Make a list of detail about the behaviors, thoughts and feelings we have when we react. (3) Follow up by making a detailed list of healthy ways we can respond.

Breathe and take time out.

Be willing to step out for a moment when we find ourselves becoming reactive.

Breathe, relax and let go as we count to ten so we can use better judgement of how to handle the situation.

Breathe. Allow better ways of communicating, admit and apologize if needed be and move on.

Curiosity rather than quick conclusions. Assume positive intent about the other person.

Ask questions to make a reality check on our assumptions.

Remember that we can misconstrue another person’s intentions. Ask the other person about their reasoning and listen to what they have to say. Explore the conversation Omtimes.com

open-heartedly, sharing our needs and validating the needs of the others, remembering that they are just as vulnerable as we are.

Ask ourselves what are we defending? Needing to right or wrong? Wanting to keep the upper hand? Needing to feel empowered? Our willingness to agree to disagree.

Be aware of how reactivity affects our health. Mario Martinez, pioneering neuropsychologist, shares the scientific research about many ways that reactivity can take a big toll on our health.

Avoid unnecessary problems and complications. We always can choose to avoid getting involved in situations that we know will trigger us in the first place. Ask ourselves if we attract difficult people as a way to maintain our habit of suffering, resistance and feeling inadequate? Are we attracting the reflection of focusing on the problem, rather that resolution? How are we using others to stay a victim of our own reactivity?

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Along with all our best intentions, we can look for the humor in the human comedy of it all, trying to hold onto control while Source is offering us a plethora of opportunities to let go!

Crystal is a certified expansion guide with the Total Integration Institute.

An author, multidimensional coach and facilitator for the live event called Freedom at the Core. She is the instructor and coach for her online course, Freedom From the Inside Out. She draws from her own experience and the experience of the thousands of people she has worked with over the past 35 years. Crystal is known for the fun and empowering way she supports people in bringing forth the experiences they want in their lives. Currently she is writing a series of children’s books that embrace the principles of living freedom. www.crystalpresenceonline. com www.facebook.com/ crystalpresenceonline

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TOMÁS GARZA

I N T E R V I E W W I T H-

DECIDE TO TRANSFORM Tomás Garza is the author of Decide: How To Replace Your Fictions with Truth, Go Big in Life, And Transform Audaciously.

He began a personal meditation practice in the mid-1980s, and has seen firsthand many ways that human beings stifle themselves.

Among these is an almost universal adherence to certain “limiting stories” about ourselves, untruths that we listen to and believe. Naturally, this keeps us stuck.

Tomás was inspired to write Decide because while people know about and practice so many things that help on a spiritual or personal transformation journey,

almost everyone neglects the power of making a decision and the importance of forgiveness.

In past career lives, Tomás has served as a family mediator in private practice, tour guide and travel host, and Adjunct Professor of Conflict Resolution at Portland State University. He and his wife Cindy spend their time in western Oregon and in in Mexico, in the State of Yucatán.

OMTIMES | DECEMBER B EDITION

OMTIMES: It is very nice to get to talk to you, Tomás, can you tell us a little about Your Show. Why “Decide to Transform”?

Tomás Garza: Massive Transformation cannot be sustained without a decision.

Without deciding to act and then acting, people dabble. They never fully commit.

They never go all-in for themselves.

They may change, but they do not transform.

Decide to Transform takes you on a deeper dive into your mind, your spirituality, and your experience. Learn practical techniques for accessible transformation, and learn to tune in—to yourself, to others, and to your purpose in life.

Each show includes a short guided meditation to help you ask the deeper questions in life and to receive deeper answers. Decide to Transform, right now, today.

OMTIMES: How did you start your life as a Spiritual and Meditation Teacher?

Tomás Garza: I stepped up as a Teacher when I realized I had many years of experience to share. I reached a point where it was no longer possible to keep it all wrapped up to myself. I felt compelled to share, and I began to do so. By the way, I am very glad I did!

OMTIMES: Were you motivated by someone who you would call an inspiration for your actual work?

Tomás Garza: Many people, actually. I credit my high school Geometry teacher for introducing me to meditation practice (he used to have us meditate in class, and I found it deeply resonant.) Along the way, I have had many other teachers, both human and nonhuman. Notable among these are my wife Cindy, Lama Michael Conklin from Kagyü Changchub Chüling in Portland, Oregon, and my very old, dear friend Lisa Berry, who has been instrumental in helping me take the next step in owning my role as a Teacher and fully stepping into it. Lisa is the host of Light on Living on OMTimes Radio.

OMTIMES: What other services do you offer our audience aside from your specialized expertise?

Tomás Garza: For those interested in working with me further, I happily offer personalized teachings in the form of a custom voice recording and/or follow-up consultations.

People who wish to take things further may book their very own VIP Day with me, where we will spend several hours taking a deeper, more customized dive into Massive Transformation and what that looks like for an individual or a small group.

In addition, I am the author of Decide: How To Replace Your Fictions with Truth, Go Big in Life, And Transform Audaciously (2019). The book is available in paperback and as an ebook.

OMTIMES | DECEMBER B EDITION

TOMÁS GARZA Interview

OMTIMES: What is your “message,” and why is it important?

Tomás Garza: Each one of us is Divine.

At our core, deep-down, we all know it.

We know that there is more to our experience than just the physical body, a job, the bills, etc. We can feel this.

When we choose to commit to a practice that helps us remove some of life’s clutter, we begin to see this more clearly.

OMTIMES: Why is it important to the Conscious, Spiritual, Holistic community to keep themselves connected with their inherited gifts?

Tomás Garza: First of all, let me comment that as a Teacher and member of this community that none of us possesses gifts, attributes, or “powers” that other people cannot develop. In this sense, we are not “special” at all.

Here in the world, however, we must show up for people and teach. We must show up to extend Love. To me, this is an obligation, a sacred commitment. People need us and our gifts and talents; we cannot leave them floundering. For this reason, we have to keep plugged into these gifts and continue to develop them. We owe it to people to show up consistently and persistently as the best version of ourselves.

OMTIMES | DECEMBER B EDITION

This message is critical. Every one of us can access this power and strength, whether it seems far-fetched or not.

Every single one of us is on this path, whatever form it may take. It is critically important that we all start right now, today, by making a decision in favor of our own transformation in favor of Love instead of fear.

"Nothing happens without Personal Transformation."

W. Edwards Deming

CONTACT TOMÁS

Website: https://tomasgarza.com

Email: tomas@tomasgarza.com

Facebook: Tomás Garza

Twitter: @tomas_garza

Instagram: tomasgarzaauthor

YouTube: Tomás Garza

Tomás Garza weekly show On OMTIMES Radio airs Every Tuesdays at 1:00 PM Eastern/10:00 AM PST Call In on 202-570.7057

Relationships The interconnectedness among all human beings and, consequently, the relationships among us are the focus of this section. The dynamics of the web of connections we make is one of the most prominent aspects of human existence: how we interlace with each other’s existence in a meaningful way.

Your Abusive Boss Will Never Change So Stop Trying To ChangeThem

By Marcia Sirota, MD.

Sometimes, a person inadvertently gets hired by an abusive boss. If this is you, you might not realize it at first, especially if they’re the type of abuser who’s initially very charming, charismatic, attractive, and super-attentive.

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Initially, you might think that you’ve won the workplace lottery, so when the inevitable red flags start waving in your face, you’re more likely to ignore them.

You tell yourself that your manager’s unkind, unreasonable, hypercontrolling and critical behaviors are just momentary lapses until they become more and more common and begin to outweigh any moments of kindness or reasonable behavior.

Little by little, your boss transforms from an apparently ideal employer into a total nightmare. You start to feel overwhelmed by all the negativity coming at you.

And this is where many people make a crucial mistake. They do this by relying more on hope than facing what’s right in front of their eyes.

This is how it goes: when your boss ultimately reveals their true, ugly colors, you tell yourself that the original version of this person is the

real one; not this undermining, crazy-making, hyper-critical micro-manager you’re currently dealing with. And you convince yourself that you can get your boss to become the ideal manager again, just by making them happy and giving them what they want So, instead of saying, “I’m out here,” you try to convince your now-abusive boss that you’re not as bad as they’re saying you are. You try to retrieve the reasonable, supportive earlier version of your boss by “proving” to them that you’re worthy of their respect.

But here’s the thing. If they’re this hyper-critical and unreasonable, it’s your boss who isn’t worthy of your respect.

Any supervisor who constantly complains about you frustrates you, undermines you, and/ or intimidates you is not deserving of your time, energy, or loyalty. Any boss who can’t value your efforts and treat you with basic consideration and respect is not the type of manager you want to work for.

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And here’s the other thing.

Anyone who is this critical of you isn’t actually criticizing you because you have faults.

Everyone has faults, including the person who’s criticizing you, especially the person who’s criticizing you. Your boss is putting you down in the mistaken belief that this will make them feel better about themselves.

But putting other people down will do nothing to boost their own self-worth.

The things that will boost someone’s self-worth are 1: self-love; and 2: kindness to others.

When you have self-love, and when you’re kind to others, you feel good about yourself.

Putting other people down will only turn you into a bitter, miserable person.

So why do some managers continually put down their staff? It’s because their brains are like the brain of an addict.

They’re convinced that the wrong thing – in their case, dominating or abusing their workers – will heal their inner

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wounds and boost their selfesteem. It doesn’t work, but just like any addict, they’re convinced that it’s not working because they’re not doing it enough.

They redouble their efforts and ratchet up the criticisms and the control, certain that more of the wrong thing will somehow turn into the right thing. Of course, it won’t, any more than more heroin; more vodka, more binge eating, or more gambling will finally make someone feel better about themselves and their life.

On your end, you’re trying to convince this hyper-critical supervisor who doesn’t actually deserve you that you’re not as bad as they keep saying you are. You’re trying to “prove” to them that you’re not as stupid or incompetent as they keep saying.

But if someone keeps saying that you’re stupid and incompetent, it proves that they’re the ones with the problem.

A reasonable boss who’s

dealing with an incompetent employee would offer them remediation or would let them go. By constantly attacking you, your boss is showing you how hurtful they really are. Their actions are telling you that they’ll never, ever be satisfied with anything you do. Their actions are showing you that remaining in this workplace is a set-up for ongoing misery.

The truth is that someone who needs to put you down to build themselves up will never accept any “proof” that you’re not as bad as they say. They need to see you as stupid and useless so that they can feel superior, by contrast. They’ll never accept your defenses against their verbal attacks because they believe that putting you down is the only way that they can feel better about themselves.

It’s futile to try and prove to a hyper-critical boss that you’re not as bad as they say.

They’re showing you, with their behavior, that they’re the one with the problem. They’re hurtful, really hurtful, and

they’ll never change.

Your abusive boss will never revert back to the seemingly supportive person you first met. That’s because this nice version was the fake version – the bait they set to trap prospective employees.

Once you were caught, they showed you their true self, and face it, it’s ugly. Stop telling yourself that they’re not so bad. They are.

The only choice in this scenario is to find other work. Instead of trying to convince an abusive boss that you’re not that bad, it makes a lot more sense to find a workplace where you can be supported in your efforts and valued for your contributions.

Sign up here for my free, monthly newsletter. October is all about developing healthy relationships and avoiding toxic ones.

And click on this link to check out my latest online course, How to Handle Difficult People, Once and For All!

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6 Secrets to Emotional Intimacy The secret to a deep, purposedriven life is not to perceive but to feel. We can see, touch, smell, taste, and hear the world around us, but not until we feel it do we truly sense the Omtimes.com

living spark. When we watch a movie, it’s not the scenes we glimpse but the emotions they evoke that make us laugh or cry. We must feel all that we do—even become intimate with it—to grasp its full meaning. This holds especially true in relationships; we might be physically attracted to someone, but only when we engage our emotions do we really connect with that person.

I met my husband a mere days after I landed in America. Whether it was fate, coincidence, or pure luck, I married him in three weeks, and we remained together until he passed away many years later. I believe what kept us together was sharing this extraordinary ability to feel each other at all times: he could detect exactly what was bothering me. Likewise, I knew just what to bring him before he could even ask. We maintained our relationship not by seeing each other day to day or going about the routines of life, but by being emotionally intimate.

The magic of intimacy is

that it can be of the soul. Far surpassing physical intimacy, emotional intimacy is the glue of any loving bond. To be emotionally intimate means to be empathetically in tune with your partner, feeling his fears, desires, wishes, and needs as if they were your own.

Implement these six keys to deepen the intimacy of your relationship: See it together. Visualization exercises can empower your relationship. You’ve probably already tried this with your partner without even realizing it: imagining what your future together will look like. Take it one step further. Hold your loved one’s hand and close your eyes as you take turns, saying your wishes out loud. Speak in the present tense, as if your dreams were coming true right now. You can say things like, “I see us walking into our new home. It’s a big, brick house with a garden in front,” or whatever it is you both want to achieve. Make this a nightly or weekly habit. Visualizations are profoundly intimate rituals that inspire you to strive towards mutual goals.

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Reinforce your love. When you speak loving words to your partner, speak them with conviction. This means saying a full and excited “I love you” instead of a hurried “love ya.” Reinforcing your love entails actions as well, like making tiny sacrifices that mean the world to your significant other: being on time, remembering to call, etc. Emphasize his importance in your life. Hold your lover close, and experience every element of his being: smell his hair, feel his back, listen to his heartbeat. Close your eyes and tell him what he means to you. Compliment and uplift him. Don’t think too much; speak from the seat of your soul. Giving and receiving love without restraint is the highest intimate act.

Pay attention to body language. The emotions we experience manifest in physical gestures. Pay attention if your partner heaves a big sigh when he crosses his legs, where he places his hands, and so

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on. Most movements are subconscious, but each one is purposeful. When you note small, inadvertent movements you can discern his level of comfort as well as what situations cause him unease.

In time, you can come to know what your partner is thinking just by watching the way he holds himself.

Make eye contact. You might want to avoid looking at your significant other in the eye when you’re upset with him. Even in such moments, keep in mind that nothing is as effective at conveying (or betraying) your sentiments as eye contact.

Words may reach the brain, but a glance can reach down to the soul. Eye contact can be intensely intimate. Get into the habit of looking your partner in the eye when addressing him to lock in the potency of your words and intentions.

Engage in quality conversation. The quality surpasses quantity when

it comes to conversation.

Maintain mindful dialogues in which you explore important topics. Ask questions to help your partner release his thoughts, but don’t make the conversation seem like an interview. Ask about one relevant matter, then let him talk as much (or as little) as he wants. Listen to his tone, choice of words, and hesitation in saying certain things. Your partner may be trying to tell you how something makes him feel, but may have trouble conveying it.

Consider the overall quality of your conversations: Are you speaking enough and if so, what is the basis of your talks? Are you reaching helpful conclusions together or harmful conclusions against each other?

The right kind of speech encourages and heals. When all else fails, simply ask, “How do you feel?”

Allow emotions to flow.

Some people are afraid to open up and feel because they believe it’ll somehow make them weak or more susceptible to being hurt. Heavy emotions like anger, bitterness, and resentment should be released in healthy ways so as not to disrupt the dynamic of your relationship. Pleasant emotions, on the other hand, must be experienced in their totality to heighten intimacy.

Excitement, passion, pleasure, and joy—these feelings should be captured in their greatest spectrum. Share positive sentiments that bring you closer together. Dismiss your fears of becoming vulnerable and allow your feelings to flow.

Emotional intimacy is not only essential to a healthy bond, but it also builds long-term harmony and stability between two partners. Practice my six secrets to emotional intimacy and reach the passionate peak of your relationship.

To emotional intimacy, Dr. Carmen Harra

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Metaphysics

5 Ways to Feel Connected to Those Who Have Passed On

By Brooke Chaplan

When a loved one passes on, it can feel as though life will never be the same.

You naturally go through a period of grief and loss where you might not be

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able to imagine living without them. While this time is painful, it helps to know that your loved one is still watching over you, and you can use these five strategies to feel connected even though they have passed on to the other side.

Continue Your Favorite Rituals You might be tempted to stop going to your weekly lunch date with your loved one or quit watching your favorite show that you used to enjoy together. However, these are special memories that existed between the two of you and continuing to do these activities reminds you of your bond.

You may be worried about feeling sad doing these things again, but it tends to have the opposite effect.

While you may feel a twinge of grief, you will also feel comforted by knowing that your memories continue on.

Talk to Them Out Loud Talking to your loved one

allows you to continue to share your life with them.

At first, this may seem silly, but it is a natural thing that many people do when they are grieving. This is especially helpful if you lived with your loved one or talked to them on the phone every day. While they may not be able to answer you back, you can certainly watch for signals that they are listening to. Feeling a sense of comfort or suddenly noticing a reminder of them, such as a scent, lets you know that you are heard.

Communicate Through a Medium You can also make talking to your loved one even further by seeking the assistance of a medium that can pick up information from people who have passed on. Seeking a professional’s services through a allows you to hear back from your loved one at any time. A medium can help give you the reassurance that your loved one is fine on the

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other side, and they can also help answer questions about what happened at the end of their life. If your loved one and you had unfinished business before they passed on, then you can also find closure through the help of a medium.

Consider Their Advice When Making Decisions When your loved one was near, you likely leaned on them for advice. You can still do so by thinking about what they would say when you are faced with a problem. Thinking through your loved one’s response can give you clarity on even the toughest matters to solve.

Try Out One of Their Hobbies Shared interests are the building blocks of relationships. Try picking up a hobby that your loved one enjoyed so that you can step into their shoes for a moment. Whether

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they were into sewing or woodworking, you’ll feel closer to them when you see what they loved about how they spent their free time.

Maintaining personal connections is what relationships are all about.

While your loved one may have passed on, you do not have to let go of your bond. Continuing to talk to them and demonstrate your love allows you to keep them close to your heart.

Although the process of dealing with loss is not easy, keeping your relationship alive helps with healing.

Brooke Chaplan is a freelance writer and blogger.

She lives and works out of her home in Los Lunas, New Mexico. She loves the outdoors and spends most of her time hiking, biking, and gardening. For more information, contact Brooke via Facebook at facebook. com/brooke.chaplan or Twitter @BrookeChaplan

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Personal Growth & Development

We grow as individuals as we face challenges and overcome life’s obstacles. This section is dedicated to helping you chart your course.

Wise Emotions Versus Blind Emotions

Our healthy and mature emotions can guide us in situations that are not clear for our logical minds.

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Emotions accompany us at every turn, as they are the natural responses to the situations that we are confronted with. They alert us to what is going on right now, what matters, whether or not pay special attention to what we hear, see, and experience.

Being conscious of our emotions can help us maintain our happiness and prepare us to better deal with all the problems and challenges that we face in our life.

Subjectivity of emotions The same event, fact, phenomenon, word, or image can evoke different emotions and reactions in various people. It is because each of us has had a different experience in life, and we have been differently shaped by our environment and background.

Learning more about our emotions can help us use them as a tool – the same way we use our five senses and our logical thinking to understand and define our experience.

It is worth it to recognize what they are trying to tell us and use that knowledge to our benefit. Our emotional intelligence could become one of our greatest strengths.

Emotional awareness Research shows that people with a high level of emotional intelligence are also the most effective, with their ability to harness emotions and apply them to their thinking and problem-solving.

More and more employers recognize that emotional intelligence is just as important to professional success as technical ability and are increasingly paying attention to the candidate’s level of emotional intelligence during the recruitment process.

In the area of our private life, it is also much easier to trust someone who understands his/her emotions as well as ours and will not take us on an unnecessary emotional roller coaster.

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Emotional awareness begins when we decide to become a good listener.

emotions, and we can’t think straight.

Each of us knows a man or a woman who is a good listener.

No matter what situation we are in, they always seem to know what to say and how to respond – so that we are not upset, neglected or offended. Such people are not only respectful but also caring about others. They always know how to inspire and give us a dose of hope and optimism.

It is due to our natural biological wiring, rooted in our ancestors’ instinctual behavior in dangerous situations – such as, for instance, when they met a lion or a bear on their path and had to do something to survive. Either run, or climb a tall tree – and very quickly, or freeze and pretend to be already dead.

They use their own emotions famously, not allowing them to take control. They well take criticism and use it constructively. They usually make the right decisions and know when to trust their intuition.

Wise Emotions versus Blind Emotions No matter how confident, experienced, or know we are – we might, especially in stressful situations, suddenly feel overwhelmed, sometimes perhaps even paralyzed with fear. We might say then that we are blinded by our Omtimes.com

We have inherited from our ancestors the so-called “fight, flight, freeze or fawn response.” It was important for our evolution as human species because it was crucial for our survival.

However, there is no need to give in to prolonged stress and let ourselves feel that way when we are simply dealing with difficult life situations.

Most Emotions can be monitored and modulated All of our emotions are good and necessary, as they are an important source of information about our experience. Fear tells us about

the threat and motivates us to respond. Sadness triggers reflection and allows us to stop and look after ourselves. Joy gives us the willingness to take on new challenges.

Whether any experience seems bitter or sweet – depends on us: bitter and sweet are just two sides of the same coin called life journey. As we know, we define our experiences, and we decide whether we like them or not.

We can compare our emotions to the clouds in the sky. They can flow, coalesce, or quietly pass by. We can identify with the clouds, being dependent on their status. Or – we can identify with the sky, which remains calm, no matter what kind of clouds (emotions) are passing through it. It means that we can sometimes be in an emotional hole, but still not suffer from it.

Our emotions can become our choice. They can be wise, mature, and helpful. Our healthy and mature emotions can guide us in situations that are not clear for our logical minds.

Our wise emotions remind us

that evolution is not just about surviving.

Evolution is primarily about thriving.

And thriving in life is about enthusiasm for life. When we begin to appreciate the wisdom of our emotions, we rediscover our enthusiasm for life.

Johanna Kern is a transformational teacher, filmmaker, and multiple award-winning authors of “365 (+1) Affirmations to Create A Great Life”, “Secrets of Love for Everyone,” “Master and the Green-Eyed Hope,” etc. She practices and shares the Master Teachings of HOPE, helping people to find their own power and progress in all areas of life. Her story received international attention, winning praise by readers in North America and Europe, and endorsement by three world-renowned experts: Stanley Krippner, Ph.D., Jerry Solfvin, Ph.D., and Brian Van der Horst. https://johannakern.com, https://www.facebook.com/ JohannaKernAuthor

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What Is Dangerous About Being Bored?

Boredom happens to the best of us, but this seemingly innocuous state of being can be dangerous to our growth.

Instead of bemoaning this feeling, we can begin to use it as a signal to get moving.

There is a two-step process

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that is simple to use and is a surefire way out of boredom.

It involves cultivating gratitude and igniting our curiosity.

Once applied, these two things will have us back on track, growing in the direction of our dreams.

Wake up, get dressed, go to work, come home, eat, sleep, repeat.

Sure, this is a little generalized, but it’s pretty much everyone’s standard routine. Routines are a necessary part of life, a structure that allows us to explore, expand, and build.

They’re also boring.

Goals get set, and then they’re met, we celebrate, we revel in the joy of success, and then inevitably end up asking, “what’s next?” What fulfilled us last year no longer fulfills us today. This is human nature, we are built to seek and transform, and while boredom happens from time-to-time, it can be treated for what it is: a signal that we are doing neither of those things.

Boredom is a big, red flag.

Its presence inhibits us from seeing opportunities, it blinds us to our blessings, and it tricks us into thinking that because we’re comfortable, we’ve arrived. We’re never truly finished, though, which is why when boredom settles in, it’s time to change up that routine. Here are two steps to get you started.

Step One: Reignite Gratitude Put simply, boredom is a symptom of lacking appreciation for our inherent potential, our gifts, and our ability to effect change in our lives and in the world. This isn’t about self-judgment or criticism. It’s about having awareness and using that awareness to create a game plan. Start an appreciation practice by spending your morning thinking of at least five things that you appreciate. Your family, your health, your morning coffee, the peaceful walk to work.

This simple practice is known as “priming” and can have

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a profound positive effect on our thoughts and help us to elevate our attitude throughout the whole day.

Step Two: Get Curious Asking questions is a surefire way out of boredom because getting curious ignites a sense of creativity and wonder in our consciousness. The world is brimming with things to explore, and even the most mundane of tasks can become transcendent when we get curious about them. So start asking a lot of questions. If we are moved by the presence of a hummingbird, we can read about them. If we notice that we’re surrounded by dragonflies, we can research their spiritual significance.

What daydream does it evoke?

How can it help us shake up our stagnant energy?

My husband, Michael Berg, has said, “Dullness and boredom come from unmet or abandoned potential.” This two-step process connects us back to that potential. When

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we use it to focus on our longterm goals and the things we want to change, magic happens. As we distill our purpose, we can start with what we appreciate and then get curious about what we want to create and how we want to give. When we set an intention to share with others in meaningful ways, not only have we thwarted boredom, but we have also found exactly what we need to live an exciting and expansive life.

Think of boredom as an invitation to discovery— finding, or even returning to, what we are most passionate about. Look around with open eyes and an open heart. Let boredom lead the way to an expansive life worth living.

Monica Berg is a teacher and writer who specializes in assisting people in living their most fulfilled lives through the wisdom of Kabbalah. She is the author of Fear Is Not an Option and serves as Chief Communications Officer for Kabbalah Centre International.

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10 Insights about Ego, You have no idea about To Promote Our Human and Spiritual Wellness

Our ego is exerting a profound influence on our human and spiritual wellness—for better or worse. However, its impact is hidden from us by our limited understanding of what it is and its purpose,

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which is ultimately a positive one—our survival. This article seeks to remove the ignorance and darkness about it that empowers unhealthy ego energy to undermine our human and spiritual wellness. And replace it with insights that shine light and truth on this very important part of who we are and our humanity.

If you’ve had a psychology class or read a book that touched on ego in the likelihood you got a very limited, very superficial, and very incomplete description that weakens your ability to understand the extremely important influence that ego is having on your life, humanly and spiritually. By the way that’s not the fault of those courses or teachers because they were only intended to give us a basic understanding of ego, not everything. Unfortunately, if we get the impression that we pretty much know everything there is to know about ego, we are missing a great deal about it and

what it’s doing to our life. So, knowing something about ego is as good as knowing nothing about ego, because what we know can be misleading. It can lead us to minimize the effect ego is having on our lives and cause us to miss the destructive impact that ego can be having on it. Weakening our ability to understand ourselves, each other, and God. Even though we are normal, intelligent, and spiritual beings, our ego energy can be leading us towards a lesser version of ourselves and a lesser version of life. Consequently, the more we know about ego and our ego energy, the more we can remove ourselves from the ignorance and darkness that empowers ego and upon which it thrives, to the truth and light upon which we can thrive.

1. Everyone has an Ego There are over 7 billion people on the planet, and every one of us has an ego.

Just as we all have a face,

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a brain, and a heart, we also have an ego. We often don’t realize this due to our ignorance of what it truly is.

2. Ego is an Energy.

Ego is energy, and its main purpose is to protect us, keep us safe, and promote our survival—our daily and human survival. It is serving as the roots for how we will try to survive in this life and hopefully serve us in living a fulfilling and meaningful life.

Unfortunately, this effort to survive can happen in some very different and often stupid ways for different people. This requires having a deep and diverse understanding of ego and the energy that it is. Failing to do this will keep us as ignorant of it now, as we were 3,000 years ago and will be 3,000 years into the future.

This will prevent any real transformation of personal and collective human and spiritual consciousness on our planet.

3. Ego Energy is Diverse and comprised of Power, Flexibility, and Vulnerability.

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Power involves the degree to which we are willing to exert influence in our life. Flexibility involves the degree we are willing to seek the truth. We do not know and discard the false truths we do know. The vulnerability involves our ability to accept and work with our weaknesses and an imperfect world. Each of these components is brought to bear as we meet the challenges of life, including relationships, achieving our potential and knowing our life’s purpose, change, adversity, stress, conflict, and living genuine happiness.

4. Ego Energy can become unhealthy and imbalanced by life circumstances—not by you, ego, or God. The experience of living too much or too little ego power, flexibility, and vulnerability are brought about by what life has brought to our door in the form of harmful, destructive, or dysfunctional people we have encountered, traumatic events, impoverished environmental circumstances, or inherited/

acquired illnesses, diseases, or disorders which have brought our daily survival into question.

5. Ego Energy is the main source of the stupidity happening in our life—not our intellect, not a mental illness, and not an absence of spirituality.

We have enough intellectual ability to think intelligently and adaptively about the challenges taking place in our life when unhealthy ego energy isn’t getting in the way. The overwhelming majority of us are not being afflicted by the type of mental illness that would compromise our ability to think rationally, intelligently, and adaptively in response to what is taking place in our life. It is not due to an absence of spirituality because of the Love, Life, and Energy—God Is, is always within us, though unhealthy ego energy can cause us to gain some distance from it.

When we attribute any of the stupidity happening in our life or those of others, to intellectual limitations,

mental illness, or the absence of spirituality, we are getting caught up in misleading explanations and missing the boat. As an example, shooting groups of people becomes a moment of empowerment for those feeling disempowered or an opportunity to express frustration and resentment in a world that is not complying with the shooter’s version of truth.

6. Ego Energy shapes what can become our “abnormalnormal,” which is the distorted ways of looking at ourselves, our life, our thoughts, our feelings, and our behaviors.

Ego energy is like a prism or filter through which we are looking at things and the nature of the power, flexibility, and vulnerability making up the prism defines it and the distortions we can get in how we see ourselves, our life, our thoughts, our feelings, and our behaviors, which reflect ego stupidity. It is abnormal because what we are thinking, feeling, or doing is unhealthy, even though others can often see it. It is normal, because it Omtimes.com

becomes so typical of what we think, feel, or do that we often make it out to be normal. By the way taking a pill will not alter or remove the prism—you do!

7. Ego Energy thrives on consistency, familiarity, predictability, and the known, which keeps us stuck in it even when we realize the things we are thinking, feeling, or doing are wrong.

So, we can be stuck in unhealthy ego energy, which entraps us in spending our life surviving rather than living. Particularly if we don’t know what to do about it.

Or, we can be experiencing healthy ego energy (which also likes consistency, familiarity…), which allows us to spend much of our life living and not just surviving.

8. Ego Energy can impact our spiritual wellness—weakening our ability to be the Love, Life, and Energy—God Is. We are always spiritual because we could not exist in the absence of God’s presence in our being. But we can gain Omtimes.com

distance from our spirituality and not be spiritually well due to unhealthy ego energy, particularly when we embrace ego illusions of separation, inequality, and unworthiness.

Unhealthy ego energy weakens our ability to be the unconditional, connective, unburdened and unlimited love that God Is. It weakens our ability to recognize and honor the presence of God in all life forms, be they human, animal, plant, insect, etc. It weakens our ability to undergo the natural healing and transformation that we were designed to experience when being the Energy—God Is. It also weakens our ability to embrace the Divine Gifts we have been given of our life, our ability to create the life in which we are living, our eternal life, and God’s presence within us, every step of our life. Unhealthy, imbalanced ego energy gets in the way of all of that and undermines our spiritual wellness.

9. Ego Energy is healed by You—not Ego, not God, and not Life.

Ego can’t do it, because it doesn’t have an awareness of what it is and what it’s doing to your life, as it doesn’t have an intellect or a capacity for intentionality.

God does not work to directly intervene in fixing our ego energy even though we can make efforts to draw upon our spiritual resources to manifest more of the Love, Life, and Energy—God Is, including the use of prayer, meditation, and service to others. Life can bring a powerful transformational event or person into our lives that can shift our ego energy in a positive direction.

But generally, they have to be pretty powerful, and you have to wait for them to come if they ever do.

For example, a near-death experience causing someone to gain greater perspective and altering or removing the prism I was talking about earlier. You are the one who can heal your ego energy that was needed with the information I can share with you in my programs and books. Because you are the only one living you!

10. Ego Energy can be healed by you with the use of Ego Medicine This involves guidance contained in each of my books towards knowing: 1) What ego is and what it isn’t, 2) Tuning into your ego energy, and 3) Replacing ego rooted non-reality-based thoughts with those which are reality-based.

Dr. Nickolas Martin is a licensed psychologist who has worked in clinical, university, public school and private practice settings as a therapist, diagnostician, educator, and consultant for 35 years. He authored Ego Therapy: A Method for Healing Your Whole Self and It’s Your Ego—Stupid!: Fix It to Fix Your Life and has co-authored with Rev. Linda M. Martin, EgoSpiritualism: Awakening to Your Human and Divine Self and The Two Voices Within: Balancing the Energies of Ego and Spirit to Enhance Your Life. https://www.egoandspirit.info/ https://www.facebook.com/ egoandspirit/

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Taming and Training the Monkey Mind

As we step more and more onto the New Landscape of the New Reality one of the important practices we can install and integrate into our knowledge base is taming or training our money mind.

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Taming That Monkey Mind, Oh boy, some fun, eh?

relentless. I am sure you know what I mean.

Well, we all have one, whether we call it that or not.

Yep, we do!

It is amazing to me when I look back on my life before taming my monkey mind, what I used to allow it to do to me. Holy Moly! Well, I assure you I am glad to be passed that

So, what is the monkey mind?

It wasn’t until I was writing a chapter about it in my book How to Be the REAL You that I Googled “Monkey Mind.”

Well, see me surprised! I found out the concept of the monkey mind goes back to Buddha 2,500 years ago.

Buddha said, “The mind is like a bunch of drunken monkeys!” I think we can agree with that, eh.

Well, it really is the typical mind chatter: things to do, fears to fear, childhood dramas to relive, judgmental comments about ourselves and others, It’s also our inner critic. It is what tells us that we can’t do anything right. That we don’t think or listen. Or that we are stupid, or useless, or unlovable, or whatever and its commitment to self-pity is

As much as the monkey mind is a pain in the pitute, we do not want to get rid of it. Oh no! It is very useful.

I love my monkey mind. In our busy lives, it’s our monkey mind that keeps on top of things. It usually keeps us on time, on schedule. It reminds us what needs to be done, who we need to talk to, what’s next. So, it does have its practical applications.

So, what do we do? We tame or train our monkey mind.

Can we do it? Yes, we can!

So, how do we do that?

We need to keep a leash on it.

Ok, how do we do that?

Well, first, we understand Omtimes.com

that the future is uncertain.

None of us really knows what is coming, but when we are concerned or anxious or fearful about what is going to happen next, we lose the ability to be in the moment.

To really love the journey of life that we are taking we need to stay in the NOW. My favorite refrain to the Monkey Mind when I find it off in the future or the past is: Hey, hey, get back here ‌ Be here now, right where we are, doing what we are doing! It works, and I usually laugh at and with myself.

But it feels good Second, we have to have the desire to put an end to the monkey mind running wild.

I do this a lot when I find my monkey mind judging, criticizing, or making stuff up.

I just yell Stop!

Inside my head, of course.

But, just between us, if I am alone, I may let my inside voice come out and yell SHUT UP! Or, depending on its craziness: SHUT THE BLANK UP!!!

I don’t do that regularly.

People may get concerned about me, you know.

ALSO, I interrupt the monkey mind with a mantra. I distract it.

Here are a few I use: May Peace Prevail on Earth, Love and Trust, Be here now.

With that desire in place, when we find our monkey mind in full swing, we stop and listen to what it is saying.

Understanding the monkey mind supports us in becoming our true selves. The monkey mind is running wild in so many lives, and taming is not hard. It just takes practice.

Sometimes the monkey mind just needs to be heard. Other times we have to be adamant and just say stop! Sometimes more than once.

The practice of taming our monkey mind has lots and lots of benefits.

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We will feel so much better.

More balanced. Less anxious.

Happier. We will become calmer people. We will begin to understand we don’t need to react; we can take the time to respond as we wish.

The monkey mind tends to be reactive, to lash out abruptly and emotionally without thinking. We do not need to do that any longer.

When we become friends with our monkey mind, we become free. Live Free!

Darity Wesley, awardwinning, best-selling author, lawyer, speaker, Death Diva, and Modern Day Oracle has traveled the spiritual, metaphysical and personal development paths for many decades. An extraordinary and powerful resource for those awakening to their evolving consciousness! Her Love from the Lotus World messages goes out monthly to her international community, for free. Sign up on her website www.DarityWesley.com.

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When you look at the view of Earth from space, you are immediately in awe of what you do see: the incredible beauty of Creation. It is not until you look closer that you realize what you do not see.

You do not see lines partitioning countries.

You do not see separation between races.

You do not see division between religions.

You do not see the walls people build to isolate themselves from each other.

There is only One Planet. There is only One Humanity.

This section is dedicated to introducing thoughts and ideas to foster a greater understanding of Humanity’s interdependence.

World Vision

The Need for a Global Patriotism

By Barbara Briggs

There is an urgent need in the world to expand our vision beyond the narrow boundaries of nationalism so that our individual interests encompass the interests of the whole world. It is time for us to recognize that the world is one

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interconnected global family.

The latest scientific experiments in the field of quantum field theory confirm that the universe is one vast interconnected web of pulsating energy, which is constantly being influenced by every thought, word, and action of everyone on this planet.

Our thoughts and feelings are continually sending out ripples into the infinitely dynamic vibratory ocean of existence.

These individual ripples oscillate in the scintillating fabric of life and interact on a subtle level with the life of all beings on the planet. We cannot gauge the influence we are having or the far-reaching effects of our actions. Therefore, it is imperative for us to move in an evolutionary direction that serves the interests of all life everywhere.

In the past, each country could be satisfied with attending to its own needs, setting its own priorities, and solving its own internal problems. But now the interface between each nation and the global community of nations is rapidly diminishing.

A problem in our nation is a problem in the world family.

The repercussions spread

across the globe, influencing the holistic functioning of the earth as a whole. The methods we use to address our national issues affect the whole world.

For example, the issue of global warming.

Every nation has to play its part to safeguard the health of the planet. Similarly, a virus in Africa can easily spread to Europe simply through the open network of intercontinental flights. Moreover, we have only to look at how the threat of terrorism has affected the world to know that our response to it must be a global one.

The only solution is to work together toward a harmonious, peaceful world in which every nation transmits a nourishing influence to every other nation.

We have to grow together and prosper together by helping each other in an atmosphere of mutual trust and benevolence.

We can learn to integrate those elements from other cultures, which elevate and enhance the strength and intelligence of our nation and eliminating those influences which can be potentially harmful. We must Omtimes.com

learn to look beneath the surface differences between cultures, religions, and nationalities to find the common thread of our humanity.

The perception of the interconnectedness of all human beings weaves life into a multi-colored pattern of integrated wholeness. This is the vision so vital in today’s world. Segregation, isolationism, the psychology of “me and mine” is outdated today; it must be replaced by the awareness of “our planet, our world, our shared interests, our global family.” Only then can we safeguard the future and ensure that our children can enjoy an affluent world rich in harmony, happiness, health, and fulfillment.

Barbara Ann Briggs is a poet, freelance journalist and a teacher of Transcendental Meditation.

Her most recent publication is Pilgrimage on the Path of Love, a novel of visionary fiction. Her web site is: https://barbaraannbriggs. com and www.facebook.com/ barbara.briggs.524,

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