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Copy March 2016

Long Island Edition • Vol. 41 #5

Extend the Garden Season with Spring Planted Bulbs

John J. Foley Skilled Nursing Facility:

A Sale Worth Waiting For

See story on page 6

by Tara Martinez

n December of 2015, the Suffolk County Legislature voted to approve the sale of the former John J. Foley Skilled Nursing Facility in Yaphank to Brookhaven Memorial Hospital Medical Center. That the approving vote was unanimous should come as no surprise. If completed, this transaction could mean $15 million dollars in revenue for the county. Not to mention that it’s expected to save Suffolk County taxpayers more than a half-million dollars per year in operating costs. But what’s more important than revenue and saving taxpayer dollars is the reopening of a facility that will provide care to countless individuals in need. The approval comes after a Bronxbased facility withdrew their $20 million bid. Legislator Kate Browning, who has been instrumental in arranging the sale, thinks this change of direction is for the better. “Anything Brookhaven does will far outweigh anything other buyers would have done,” she said in a phone interview. “We are in the process of doing our due dilligence,” said Richard Margulis, President and CEO of Brookhaven Memorial Hospital Medical Center. “Once completed, the findings will be assessed and a decision will be made.”

Grandparenting: Tag Teaming

Toddlers

Story page 7

Financial & Preplanning Pages 9-13

Alzheimer’s Legal and Financial Planning Seminar Story page 9

Buying Groceries

Online Story page 14

The 50+ LifeStyles Guide to

St. Patrick’s Day Parades Story page 15

Kinship Doesn’t Count for

Continued on page 4

March Events .......................... Page 3 Crosswords ............................Page 18 Veterans News ......................... Page 8 Sudoku................................... Page 18 Classiﬁed Ads .......................... Page 16 Theater & Recreation............. Page 19

Coming in the April Issue

Health & Fitness Home Improvement

Comps

Story pages 16

50+ LifeStyles March 2016 â&#x20AC;˘ 50PlusLifestyles.com

EVENTS

March Through March 20

March 18

Winterfest - Live on the Vine. A month-long vinters celebartion returns for its ninth year with more than 70 events over 40 different venues on the East End. More info at 631-331-0808; www.liwinterfest.com.

Ye Olde Fatted Lamb Tavern. Come learn and party like it’s 1677! At the Oyster Bay Historical Society, 20 Summit Street, Oyster Bay; 7 p.m. Info: 516-922-5032; www.oysterbayhistorical.org.

Through March 26 Godspell. Theatre Three, 412 Main Street, Port Jefferson. For info/Times/Tix: 631928-9100; search.seatyourself.biz/webstore/webstore.html?domain=t3&&event=.

March 6 Chamber Works for Piano and Instruments. At the Long Island Museum of American Art, History & Carriages, 1200 Route 25A, Stony Brook; 5 p.m. Admission $25. Info: 631-751-0066; www.longisland museum.org.

March 6 Irish Experience 18th Annual Festival. At Hofstra University Hempstead Turnpike, Hempstead; 11 a.m. to 5 p.m. Admission: $6 adults; $5 for senior citizens (65 and older). Children under 12 are free. Info: 516-463-6582; www.hofstra.edu.

March 6-13 Smithtown Restaurant Week. Various locations throughout Smithtown. Participating restaurants are offering a 3-course price fixed dinner at $27.95 per person. Info: 631 979-8069; www.smithtownchamber.com.

March 12-13 (and 19-20) Brookhaven Town Home and Garden Show. At the Brookhaven Holtsville Ecology Site, 249 Buckley Rd., Holtsville. Saturdays 11a.m. to 7 p.m., Sundays 11 a.m. to 5 p.m. Admission is $6, kids 16 and younger are free. Info: 631-758-9664;ext 10

March 12-13 The Long Island Pen Show. Collectors and dealers of vintage and modern writing instruments and accessories of all kinds. Demonstrations, repairs and appraisals. Hofstra University, Hempstead Tpk., Hempstead; 631-235-4690; www.lipenshow.com.

March 12 to 26 I Ought to be in Pictures. A Neil Simon comedy. At the BroadHollow at Elmont, 700 Hempstead Turnpike, Info: 516-775-4420; www.broadhollow.org.

March 12 through April 10 The Music Man. At the CM Performing Arts, 931 Montauk Highway, Oakdale. Info/Times/Tix: 631-218-2810; tix5.centerstageticketing.com/sites/creative ministries//.

March 20 Purim Carnival. A special family event with fun for all. At the Suffolk Y JCC, 74 Hauppauge Road, Commack. Info: Scott Zlochower, Program Director at 631-462-9800 x 126 or e-mail: szlochower@syjcc.org.

March 24 Long Island Women During the Revolution. With Natalie Naylor. Southampton Historical Museum, Rogers Mansion, 17 Meeting House Lane, Southampton; 11 a.m. Free. Info: 631-283-2494; www.southamptonhistoricalmuseum.org.

March 26 Volunteer Fair. Want to volunteer? Meet with over a dozen organizations looking for volunteer assistance; 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. At the Holbrook Library, 150 Holbrook Road, Holbrook; 631 588-5024; www.sachemlibrary.org.

March 27 Port Jefferson Easter Parade. Through Port Jefferson Village; noon to 1:30 p.m. Info: 631-473-1414; www.portjeffchamber.com.

March 30 Women’s History Month Speaker: Holocaust Survivor Esther Bauer. At SJC Long Island, McGann Conference Center, O’Connor Hall; 1 to 2 p.m. Info: 631-6874595 or mhassanin@sjcny.edu.

COMING

SPRING 2016! The Long Island

Reserve Your Space NOW!

March 12 Jerusalem Symphony Orchestra. At the Tillies Center for the Performing Arts, LIUPost Campus, 720 Northern Blvd., Brookville; 8 p.m. Info: 516-299-3100;www.tilliescenter.org. A comprehensive “How To” guide for Seniors and Caregivers

A Publication of

The comprehensive guide for Seniors and Caregivers

GREAT OPPORTUNITIES FOR:

Health & Hospitals • Home Care Services Elder Law Insurance • Financial Planning • Care Management Dental & Eye Care • Hearing & Audiology • Pre-Planning Medical Supplies & Equipment • Hospice Laboratory Services • AssistedLiiving • Nursing Homes Wound Care/Rehabilitation • Specialized Medical Care

To be included contact:

Evelyn Aloisio (631) 286-0058 Ext.221 50+ LifeStyles March 2016 • 50PlusLifestyles.com

COVER STORY Browning’s line of thought stems from Brookhaven’s keen awareness of local needs. Not only is Brookhaven Memorial Hospital a respected local facility, but it’s a nonprofit organization that’s been committed to the community for more than 50 years. So, it’s more than safe to say that Brookhaven is equipped to make this sale a worthwhile one. For Suffolk County residents, both elderly and those that require round-the-clock care, a Brookhaven run facility would mean easier access to high quality healthcare programs. “Our purpose in looking to acquire the John J. Foley site is to further our mission as a healthcare provider, expanding and bringing

new services to the residents of Suffolk County,” said Mr. Margulis. ”Examples of such services may include the expansion of our hemodialysis program, a drug treatment program and, possibly, a residential Assisted Living Program (ALP). Overall, it seems that those behind this potential sale have the community’s best interests in mind, especially when it comes to making quality healthcare more readily available. But there’s still a long way to go before Suffolk County residents see results. Brookhaven’s due diligence can take several months to complete. If the sale does in fact go through sometime in 2016, it would mark the end of an eight-

year battle to pass the John J. Foley Skilled Nursing Facility on to a suitable buyer. Between 2008 and 2013, the county made several efforts to close budget deficits with a profitable sale, but for one reason or another, each effort has fallen through. The county has been anxious to see a sale move forward. Unsurprisingly, they’re not the only ones. Many Suffolk County residents, especially those who see the potential for job growth, are awaiting the day when the facility finally reopens. “This is an exciting time for our community and we look forward to bringing our vision to reality,” said Mr. Margulis. The John J. Foley Skilled Nursing Facility was a county owned and operated 264-bed facility that first opened its doors in 1995. The facility closed in 2013.

www.50plusNY.com PRESIDENT/PUBLISHER Frank C. Trotta ext. 100 EXECUTIVE EDITOR Tim Edwards ext. 111 VICE PRESIDENT SALES & PRODUCTION Marie S. Trotta ext. 113 EDITOR Gary P. Joyce ext. 250 ART DIRECTOR Gregory Jones ext. 232 DIRECTOR OF COMMUNITY RELATIONS Gene Pritz EDITORIAL OFFICE: 146 South Country Road, Suite 4 Bellport, NY 11713 Tel (631) 286-0058 · Fax (631) 286-6866 Advertising Rate Card By Request COPY DEADLINE 15th of previous month ©50+ Lifestyles™

Letter to the Editor Being a boomer, I would like to let your staff know that I enjoy reading your publication for many reasons. I like the human interest articles as much as the Veterans column among other features. Winner of 5 National Awards

Thanks again, Rosemary McKinley Author and Poet 101 Glimpses of the North Fork and Islands The Wampum Exchange

LifeStyles Sudoku Solution from page 18

LifeStyles Puzzle Solution from page 18

FREE COPIES OF 50+ LIFESTYLES AVAILABLE AT MOST Stop & Shop, King Kullen, Best Yet and Libraries throughout Nassau and Suffolk Counties. 50+ LifeStyles March 2016 • 50PlusLifestyles.com

Extend the Garden Season with Spring Planted Bulbs By Melinda Myers - Columnist, Author and host of The Great Courses “How to Grow Anything: Food Gardening For Everyone” eeping your garden looking its best throughout the growing season and into fall is possible with the help of low maintenance spring planted bulbs. Plant them in spring among other annuals or perennials and watch as these bulbs brighten the garden, adding new life to your late season gardens. These easy care plants reward you with loads of beauty. Just plant, water and enjoy. Quality online retailers like Longfield Gardens (longfield-gardens.com) offer the greatest variety of color, shapes and sizes as well as planting and care instructions. Grow dahlias in sunny areas with at least six hours of sunlight for the best floral display. Simply plant the tuberous roots four to six inches deep with the stem facing up after the danger of frost has passed. Use dahlias in a cutting garden or as an attractive screen along fences and property lines. Use the shorter more compact border dahlias, like ‘Gallery Pablo’ in containers on your patio, balcony or deck where you and the hummingbirds will enjoy their blooms. Wait until the danger of frost has passed to plant cannas in a full sun to partially shaded locations. Plant the canna rhizomes horizontally two to three inches deep with the growing point facing up. Use as a vertical accent in a large container or select dwarf varieties for smaller pots. Calla lilies are another spring planted bulb that thrives in full sun or part shade. Include these one- to two-foot-tall plants in the front or middle of the flower garden or as a vertical accent or filler in a pot. The black flowers of ‘Night Cap’ teamed with the white blooms of ‘Crystal Clear’ create an elegant display. Like the other bulbs, wait for the danger of frost to pass before plant-

50+ LifeStyles March 2016 • 50PlusLifestyles.com

ing outdoors. Plant the knobby rhizomes two- to four-inches deep with the growing point facing up. Add some color and wow factor to shaded areas with caladiums and elephant ears. Wait for the danger of frost to pass and the soil to warm, 65 to 70 degrees, before planting them in the garden. Include elephant ears in the garden or containers. Their large heart shaped leaves give a tropical feel to the patio, deck or pool area. Consider planting one, two or more to create an impressive welcome for guests or a bold statement in the landscape. They pair nicely with caladiums, coleus and other shade loving plants. Make this the best season yet with the help of spring flowering bulbs. You’ll enjoy the variety and late season color these easy care plants provide.

Grandparents & Grandkids Tag Teaming

Toddlers By Gary P. Joyce

h, we’re going to have to get into shape for this one,” said my wife, RN Linda (ret.), ominously.“This one” was a joint operation conceived by my daughter, approved by higher command (Linda) to be conducted by Linda and I. The mission: watch our daughter’s children while she and her husband moved. The objectives of the operation: keep three-plus-year old Madeline and 17-month-old Keira safe — and us alive — for 24 hours after which, theoretically, we’d hand the subjects back to the parents. D-Day dawned cold in Lower Manhattan. The plan called for us to take the LIRR to Penn, hop a cab to their apartment, play with the grandkids for an hour or two, bundle them into our daughter’s car and haul out east to their house, where — due to familiarity with their surroundings, surfeit of toys, their own beds, etc. — the grandkids would supposedly go to sleep on arrival. We got all the dirt in our initial briefing. This one cries over this, that one cries over that, this one stays awake all night and cries and that one gets up when the other one sleeps and cries, Keira only likes this, Madeline only likes that, etc., etc. The grandkids started wanking pretty much 30 minutes into our visit, and it seemed to foretell a loooong sleepless night ahead for us. I surreptitiously caught Linda’s eye and arched my eyebrow. What kind of long-term Apocalypse Now horror had we signed up for? Fortunately, Linda had done some scouting prior to the mission’s launch date. She went food shopping for both kid and adult; food to stuff in the mostly empty fridge. We moved all the diapers, etc., from our house to theirs, generally cleaned up, changed linens, made sure the heater was working, fixed up Elsa’s Ice Castle, made sure the flashlights had batteries, etc. We were ready. Last minute instructions? My son-inlaw told me how to fire up the wood stove. I listened intently — pretty much how I listened to first lieutenants back in the day — and, as I did back then, immediately forgot everything. “We got both the lambies (the kids go-to-sleep stuffed critters)?” I yelled to my son-in-law as we loaded the kids into their car seats (no longer an easy feat!), motioning the parents to get the hell away from the kid’s line of sight, so we could at least get to the Midtown Tunnel with no screaming. Whew, made it down the FDR and into the tunnel. The thump-thump of expansion strips lulled the two rugrats to sleep and we spoke in the lowest of voices on the way home, only to wake the two cherubs as I made a wrong turn trying to get to the LIRR parking lot in Ronkonkoma to retrieve our car. Both Linda and I kept the four letter words to a hushed minimum. Into the driveway, the kids groggy, grandpa groggy, grandma not so groggy and we hustle and bustle the kids directly into their beds (we made sure they were in PJs before they got in the car). Apparently the ‘trauma’ inflicted by leaving their parents had the desired affect. They conked out with barely a whimper as soon as they hit the pillows. And,

despite being still on-duty, we thoroughly enjoyed a glass of wine and a glass of my son-in-law’s aged scotch. Ah. And here’s what we learned if you’re taking on a duet of grandchildren. The kids will behave how you set the tone for them to behave from the first time you encounter them … when the doting parents aren’t around. Nobody wanked, cried, bratted out or otherwise for us. It’s like when your kids behaved better for other people than they did for you. Preparation is the key. Our kids say they have everything ready to go, but they never do. Check the food/liquid supply (theirs and yours!). Pack your stuff, book, flashlight, meds, etc. Don’t make any plans — the timetable as in any military operation ever concieved goes out the window as soon as the mission starts. Decide beforehand who’s doing what, but make sure the job is split at least 60-40 in favor of grandpa. Yes, grandma’s gonna’ do more work, so let her call the shots.

As Primary Season Gets Underway Does Your Future Depend on Social Security & Medicare?

he 2016 election for the White House and Congress will be expensive, combative and extremely important for the future of generations of older Americans. Literally millions of American families are impacted by decisions made in Washington on Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid, yet these issues remain on the back-burner for many political candidates. To help arm voters with the facts, the National Committee has launched SeniorVote2016.org as a one-stop, easy to use source of information on the 2016 campaign. SeniorVote2016’s Candidate Watch provides easy-to-use interactive graphics showing the candidates’ campaign positions and plans for Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid with links to additional interviews and statements about these vital programs. The Reading Room offers details of current legislative proposals which would impact American’s retirement and health security including questions voters can ask candidates about where they stand on issues such as: turning Medicare into a voucher program, cutting Medicare to fund other programs, raising the Social Security retirement age, cutting benefits through adoption of the Chained CPI and creation of a cost of living adjustment for seniors (CPI-E). Visitors to SeniorVote2016 can also take action directly from the website by pledging to vote and engaging on social media with other Social Security and Medicare activists. In addition to the roll out of SeniorVote2016, the National Committee has launched a daily e-mail news digest, providing readers with the latest media coverage on the campaigns and the issues. “Your Morning Read” will have a summary of the important need-to-know stories voters will value as they determine which candidates are most committed to preserving and strengthening America’s most successful programs. 50+ LifeStyles March 2016 • 50PlusLifestyles.com

Veterans

News

COUNCILMAN MACAGNONE ANNOUNCES 2016 TOWN SOLDIER COLLECTION DRIVE

he Town of Oyster Bay is participating in a 2016 Soldier Collection Drive in an effort to gather needed supplies to be sent to the men and women serving around the globe and is asking residents to help support the drive, according to Town Councilman Anthony D. Macagnone, who noted that this is the ninth year the town is participating in this collection drive. Anyone interested in donating to the collection drive may drop off items at Town Hall North in Oyster Bay; Department of Public Works (CSEA entrance) in Syosset; Town Hall South in Massapequa; and at the Town of Oyster Bay Ice Skating Center at Bethpage Community Park. The collection drive will end on Friday, March 18, 2016. Items needed include: antibiotic and Cortisone ointments, white socks, Visine, athletic T-shirts (black or brown only), Pepto Bismol tablets, beef

50+ LifeStyles March 2016 • 50PlusLifestyles.com

jerky, Tylenol/Advil, lollipops/hard candy/mints, Band-Aids, peanut butter, deodorant, cereal, powder, microwave pastas & soups, razors, protein shakes and bars, mouthwash, tuna fish (pre-mixed packets) no cans, Chapstick, nuts, body wash, feminine products, baby wipes, travel size items, sunblock/insect repellent, dog biscuits, empty shoe boxes, quart and gallon size Zip-lock bags. Letters and notes to the soldiers are also welcome. For more info contact Councilman Macagnone’s office at 516-624-6618.

WWII VET GETS HIS PURPLE HEART

he Purple Heart is limited to members of the Armed Forces of the United States who, while serving our country, were wounded, killed, or have since died due to wounds received during battle. It is awarded in the name of the President of the United States. In August of 2015, Congressman Zeldin presented Mr. Stone with the Bronze Star Medal. On April 28-29, 1945, while overseas aboard the U.S.S. Butler gunship in Okinawa, Mr. Stone was wounded. Mr. Stone’s Bronze Star Medal citation states, “Although wounded during action with the enemy he helped to remove a more seriously wounded man to safety and returned to his gun…” On Sunday, January 31, 2016, Mr. Stone received the Purple Heart award on behalf of a grateful nation. Pictured (from left to right), are Navy Commander Dom Pastorin, Commanding Officer of NOSC Long Island, Mr. Stone and Congressman Zeldin.

FINANCIAL & PREPL ANNING

Alzheimer’s Legal and Financial Planning Seminar

t’s important for everyone to plan for the future, but legal plans are especially important for a person with Alzheimer’s disease. The sooner planning starts, the more the person with dementia may be able to participate. Early planning allows the person with dementia to be involved and express his or her wishes for future care and decisions. This eliminates guesswork for families, and allows for persons with dementia to designate decision makers on their behalf. Early planning also allows time to work through the complex legal and financial issues that are involved in long-term care. Legal planning should include: Making plans for health care and long-term care; Making plans for finances and property; Naming another person to make decisions.

Legal Capacity Legal capacity is the ability to understand and appreciate the consequences of one's actions and to make rational decisions. In most cases, if a person with dementia is able to understand the meaning and importance of a given legal document, he or she likely has the legal capacity to execute it. The requirements of legal capacity can vary from one document to another. A lawyer can help determine what level of legal capacity is required for a person to sign a particular document. Before a person with dementia signs a legal document: • Talk with the person. Find out if the person with dementia understands the legal document and the consequences of signing it. Make sure the person knows what is being explained and what he or she is being asked to do. • Ask for medical advice. If concerns exist about the person's ability to understand, ask for medical advice. A doctor may be able to assist in determining the level of a person's mental ability. • Take inventory of existing legal documents. Verif y whether living wills, trusts and powers of attorney were signed before the person was diagnosed. The person may no longer remember having completed them. Even if legal documents were completed in the past, it is im-

portant to review them with another person for necessary corrections and/or updates. Meeting with a Lawyer You can complete certain legal documents without a lawyer, but getting legal advice and services from an attorney who specializes in elder law can be especially helpful. If you have a lawyer, he or she may be able to refer you to an attorney that specializes in elder law. Otherwise, there are several resources available to help you locate elder law services in your community. Free Legal and Financial Planning Conference. Hosted by Alzheimer’s Association, L.I. Chapter. Sat., March 12, Plainview Holiday Inn. For more information call 800-272-3900.

50+ LifeStyles March 2016 • 50PlusLifestyles.com

FINANCIAL & PREPL ANNING

Protect Your Assets From Unexpected Events By Donald J. McCormick, CFP® ife is full of surprises both good and bad. If you’re unprepared financially to handle them, these events could leave you feeling anxious about your financial situation. Protecting the assets you’ve already accumulated and your ability to continue building for your future is essential to preparing for the unexpected. Consider the following examples of how unplanned

50+ LifeStyles March 2016 • 50PlusLifestyles.com

events could impact your finances: • The sudden, untimely death of a caregiver for young children could create immediate financial hardship. It could also mean that key goals, such as college or retirement, could seem out of reach. • An unexpected illness or injury could keep you or your spouse from working. If the disability continues for an extended period of time, it could lead to a major financial strain for your household. Once again, funding for important long-term goals may need to be reevaluated. • A medical condition suddenly arises that requires significant treatment. Without adequate healthcare coverage, you may need to liquidate savings intended for other purposes. As you think about the potential surprises in your life, evaluate your current situation and consider whether your protection strategy is adequate in the following categories:

Life insurance This is one of the most fundamental forms of insurance – protection for family members if you or your spouse should die. The consequences of death can be devastating to a family in many ways, not the least of

FINANCIAL & PREPL ANNING which is financially. Keep in mind that there is a financial impact even if either of you are not earning income outside the home. If you are a stay-at-home spouse or volunteer, the role you play at home will need to be filled should you pass away unexpectedly. It’s recommended to have sufficient life insurance in place to replace the lost income and to cover a lifetime of needs for your family.

Disability income insurance Many people overlook the financial risk of a disabling injury or illness, assuming their health insurance will cover additional expenses. If you incur an injury or illness that prevents you from earning your regular income, disability income insurance helps replace that income. This coverage is often offered by your employer, and most plans offer several levels of coverage as a percentage of your income. Make certain your coverage is sufficient to truly protect all of your income needs in the event of a protracted illness or injury.

used to address a significant health event, pay for medication or treatment, and can help secure quality specialized care.

Property/casualty coverage While you’re likely to have auto and home insurance, it’s important to make sure you have enough coverage. Common underinsured areas: Look specifically at the following limits in your car insurance policy: personal injury protection, collision / comprehensive, uninsured / underinsured motorists and roadside assistance, among others. For your home, consider if you’re covered for home media and computer equipment, adventure equipment (golf clubs, bikes, fishing equipment, etc.), and high-value items like fine jewelry, art, collections, musical instruments or china. Take a look at specialty insurance for bigticket items like boats, ATVs, RVs, collector cars and motorcycles as well as special circumstances like pet, earthquake or flood insurance.

Health insurance Extended care/ Long-term care insurance Costs for in-home care, assisted living or a nursing home can be substantial, even if you have a healthy amount saved for retirement. Extended care or long-term care insurance can be

The law now requires that you have coverage for medical expenses. You may participate in an employer-sponsored health plan, or you may obtain individual coverage. If you’ve reached age 65, Medicare can be an option. Also consider if vision or dental insurance makes sense for your

family. To get started, add up your total healthcare costs last year, then estimate the amount you’ll need next year. Talk to potential insurance providers (or your employer if they offer these plans) about how insurance could be applied to services like new contacts, required surgeries and procedures, or your teen’s braces.

Emergency fund For unplanned expenses not covered by insurance, consider having cash available in an emergency fund. Whether this is to replace a furnace or to help meet a short-term income need, a good rule of thumb is to have at least six-tonine months of income in an easily accessible savings account. Consider sharing your current situation and potential gaps with a financial advisor who can help you look at your coverage in the context of your goals and other financial obligations. Donald J. McCormick, CFP and a Private Wealth Advisor with Ameriprise Financial Services in Bohemia, NY, specializes in fee-based financial planning and asset management strategies and has been in practice for 28 years. To contact him, call 631-582-9770 ext:306, e-mail him at Donald.j.mccormick@ ampf.com or go to his website Donaldjmccormick.com Ameriprise Financial, Inc. and its affiliates do not offer tax or legal advice. Consumers should consult with their tax advisor or attorney regarding their specific situation.

50+ LifeStyles March 2016 • 50PlusLifestyles.com

FINANCIAL & PREPL ANNING

Ways to Talk About Money with Your Family

et’s be honest. When we think about money, we’re talking about a host of related consequences and deeply felt emotions, says retirement specialist Lee Stoerzinger. “Money cuts to the emotional roots of every human issue,” says Stoerzinger, a Certfied Financial Planner and head of Lee Stoerzinger, Inc., (www.leestoerzinger.com) and author of On The Back Burner. Stoerzinger, who says he began to see money in a new way after adopting two children from Haiti and who has helped streamline adoption efforts for other Haitian children to American families, offers ways adult children may speak to their retired or retiring family members about money. 1) Start by appreciating storytelling. We communicate with one another through storytelling, and if you want to learn more about yourself, then listen to your family stories. Don’t be afraid to get your parents talking — about how they met, their first or worst job, what the economy was like when they were younger, etc. For many, talk about money is tough because families often are not communicative in general. Get to know your folks better. Appreciate the stories and try to make for a comfortable environment, such as dinner. 2) Be true to your feelings. Let your parents know how you really feel (the good and the not so good). Your feelings will outlive your parents. Let them out now, while there is time to resolve them. Clear things up and be honest.

Seven Common Estate Planning Mistakes By Ronald A. Fatoullah, Esq. he following are seven of the most commonly made mistakes when estate planning: 1. Failing to plan. If an individual does not have an estate plan, his assets will be distributed according to the law in the state in which he resides. In New York, a surviving spouse is entitled to $50,000 plus half of the estate, with the children inheriting the balance. A single person’s estate will pass to his children, parents, or siblings. If a person dies with absolutely no living relatives, his estate passes to the state in which he was domiciled. 2. Doing it yourself (“DIY”). Poorly drafted documents often end up costing the estate and heirs additional money. If there is anything about a family situation that is not commonplace, using a DIY estate planning program means taking a large risk that can affect one’s family for generations to come. The problems created by not getting competent legal advice probably will not be borne by the person creating the will, but may well be shouldered by such person's heirs.

50+ LifeStyles March 2016 • 50PlusLifestyles.com

3) Appreciate their plight and express compassion. Let them know you recognize the efforts they have made in this world. Everyone has sins, mistakes, failures, pain and guilt. Though you were not around to observe, your parents endured broken hearts and tough circumstances, too. They did the best they could. Let them know you “get it.” 4) Be thankful out loud with gratitude. These are, after all, the people who toilet trained you. Thank them for giving you life. Think of the good times and appreciate the opportunities they provided. Vacations, education, special outings, bicycles, time together, a room of your own—let them know how grateful you are for these things. 5) Apologize and make amends. We’re all capable of being mean. Whatever it is, take responsibility for your actions. A genuine “I’m sorry” allows two people to talk through a situation. This will be hard, but you won’t regret it. Sometimes it’s better to be kind than right. 6) Let forgiveness in. Forgiveness is humbling in any relationship, and it helps to say, “I love you so much and I am willing to set aside my pride in order to remain in your company.” Forgiveness keeps us together, even when opinions clash. In the case of profound hurts, forgiveness can be a way to heal and move on. The pain may never be resolved, but at least we can gather our dignity. Since 1993, Lee Stoerzinger, CFP (www.leestoerzinger.com), has dedicated his professional life to the study of finance, and to helping people become financially independent.

3. Not planning for disability. A properly drafted estate plan not only specifies what will happen to one’s assets upon death; it also plans for what happens if one becomes incapacitated. It is important to have documents, such as a power of attorney and health care proxy, that appoints a trusted agent to act with respect to both financial and medical matters. 4. Failing to fund a trust. Even if a person has implemented an estate plan, his work is not necessarily done. If one’s estate plan includes a trust, the trust has to be funded in order for it to be effective. A trust is “funded” by retitling assets in the name of the trust, or the trust is nothing more than an empty shell and will be useless. 5. Not checking one’s beneficiary designations. All individuals should periodically review their retirement plan beneficiary designations to make sure that they are not outdated. Retirement accounts are most often distributed according to the forms that are filled out with the account holder. Typically, a retirement asset will not pass to the beneficiary through a will or trust. Every retirement account owner needs to make sure that he has named a beneficiary as well as a successor in case the named beneficiary predeceases him. 6. Consult with a wealth advisor. You want to make sure your assets are invested sensi-

bly. A good wealth advisor will develop a longterm financial strategy for you. We strongly advise that you retain the services of a professional, experienced financial advisor who will review your investments. 7. Not reviewing the plan. Once a person has an estate plan in place, it is important to keep it up to date. Circumstances change over time and one’s estate plan needs to keep up with these developments. Major changes that may affect a person’s plan include getting married or divorced, having children, or experiencing an increase or decrease in assets. Even if an individual does not experience any major changes, he should review his plan periodically to make sure it continues to express his wishes. Utilizing an experienced estate planning/elder law attorney and wealth manager is the best way to ensure that these mistakes are not made. Ronald A. Fatoullah, Esq. is the principal of Ronald Fatoullah & Associates, a law firm that concentrates in elder law, estate planning, Medicaid planning, guardianships, estate administration, trusts, wills, and real estate. The law firm can be reached at 516-466-4422 or 718-261-1700, or toll free at 1-877-ELDER-LAW or 1-877ESTATES. Mr. Fatoullah is also the co-founder of JR Wealth Advisors, LLC. The wealth management firm can be reached at 516-466-3300 or 1-800-353-3775.

FINANCIAL & PREPL ANNING

New York Moves Forward in Protecting Patients Upon Discharge By David R. Okrent, CPA, Esq.

reat News! On January 7, 2016 New York enacted new laws titled the “THE CAREGIVER ADVISE, RECORD AND ENABLE ACT” also known as The Care Act. This act requires a hospital to allow a patient an opportunity to designate, upon entry to a hospital, a caregiver in the patient’s medical record.

Why do states need this law? • Most care recipients (69 percent) did not have a home visit by a healthcare professional after discharge from the hospital. • Almost half (46 percent) of family caregivers perform medical or nursing tasks for their loved ones with multiple chronic physical and cognitive conditions • Three out of four (78 percent) who provide medical or nursing tasks manage medications, including administering intravenous fluids and injections. • Most family caregivers report they received lit-

tle or no training to perform these tasks. Caregivers are often members of the individual’s immediate family, as well as friends, and other community members; most seniors who receive assistance at home rely exclusively on unpaid family caregivers for help. While most caregivers are asked to assist an individual with basic activities of daily living, such as mobility, eating, and dressing, many are expected to perform complex tasks on a daily basis such as administering multiple medications, providing wound care, and operating medical equipment. Despite the vast importance of caregivers in the individual’s day-to-day care, many caregivers find that they are often left out of discussions involving a patient’s care while in the hospital and, upon discharge, receive little to no instruction on the tasks they are expected to perform. The federal Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services (CMS) estimates that $17 billion in Medicare funds is spent each year on unneces-

13 sary hospital readmissions. Additionally, hospitals desire to avoid the imposition of new readmission penalties under the federal Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act (ACA). With nearly one in five Medicare patients returning to the hospital within a month of discharge, the government considers readmissions a prime symptom of an overly expensive and uncoordinated health system. The hospital is now required to notif y and meet with the designated caregiver 24 hours prior to discharge or transfer to another facility to discuss the patient’s plan of care. The hospital is also required to instruct the designated caregiver in certain after-care tasks upon a patient’s discharge to his or her current residence. In order to successfully address the challenges of a surging population of older adults and others who have significant needs for long-term services and supports, the state enacted these laws to enable caregivers to continue to support their loved ones at home and in the community, and avoid costly hospital readmissions.

Mr. Okrent, Esq. has been handling elder law, estate planning & special needs matters for over 29 years. He works on policy matters as the Long Island Delegate of the NYSBA\Elder Law Section. Visit www.davidrokrentlaw.com or call 631-427-4600.

50+ LifeStyles March 2016 • 50PlusLifestyles.com

TECH TALK Where All Your Technology Questions are Answered — by Nick Radesca, SeniorNet

Buying Groceries

Online permarket. I wanted to buy chicken breasts so after selecting “Meats & Seafood” I chose chicken and under Pe due Chicken Breasts I tapped “Add to Cart” — at which point $3.25 for one pound was added to my shopping cart total in the upper right corner green box. If I wanted more than one pound, I would press the + sign. I went along this way, choosing items from other categories, and with each item selected my shopping cart dollar total increased. After it exceeded the minimum order size of $60 and I was finished shopping, I tapped the green shopping cart dollar total in the upper right corner and was presented with the full list of items I had selected that I could edit. I could adjust quantities, delete items, empty the cart or checkout.

under $1. The delivery person will take your coupons in a sealed envelope and once validated a payment credit is issued.

Delivery can be as little as

6.95

nline grocery shopping is a necessity for certain people. It can be essential for those with debilitating ailments, people with no car and today’s super busy moms and dads. If I were to start I’d probably try Stop and Shop’s Peapod, whose trucks are always in my community. FreshDirect is the other national online home delivery grocery company that currently services Long Island.

Placing an Order Orders are placed from either Peapod’s website or app. As suggested in the app’s Help section, the first thing I did was reserve a delivery date and time. To do so I tapped “Delivery/Pickup Times” from the main menu and then “Select Delivery” (as opposed to “Select Pickup”) at a Stop & Shop store. I was then presented delivery dates for the next two weeks and chose the first available time slot which was Monday, January 11 from 4 to 6 p.m. With that done I started shopping. From the Home screen I tapped the shopping cart icon/ “Browse Aisles” button and was presented with item categories found in a typical su50+ LifeStyles March 2016 • 50PlusLifestyles.com

When I tapped “Checkout” I was asked to supply the delivery address, billing address, and phone number. I then entered a credit or debit card for payment. Cash is not accepted. Peapod accepts manufacturer coupons doubling those

Amazing Sorting and Filtering Options While shopping I was presented with an amazing variety of helpful sorting and filtering options. The default sort was “Most Popular” but I could change the sort to list items by Price, Description, Specials, Calories, Fat, Carbohydrates, Cholesterol, Dietary Fiber, Protein, Sodium, Sugar, or Weight Watchers. In addition, I could filter a sort to show only those items having one or more nutritional considerations that included, Dairy-Free, Egg-Free, Gluten-Free, Low Calorie, Low Carbs, PeanutFree, USDA Low Fat, USDA Low Sodium. I could even filter by my past purchases. To make shopping quicker, there’s an option that allows shopping from a Favorites list, which I would have had to previously create. Cost Peapod’s delivery fee for a minimum order of $60 is $9.95 but for orders over $100 it’s $6.95. Store pickup fee is $2.95. FreshDirect’s minimum order is $30 and home delivery fee is $6.99. Tipping is optional for both. Usually each has promotional deals for new customers. At the time of this writing Peapod’s website indicated that new customers placing orders of $100 or more would receive 60 days’ free delivery plus $20 off the first order.

The 50+ LifeStyles Guide to

St. Patrick’s Day Parades

lthough Easter falls early this year (March 27), and the month of March has — among other celebratory days of note — the Ides, the month is most oft connected with the Wearin’ o’ the green; St. Patrick’s Day. St. Patrick is said to have died on his namesake day (March 17) in 461, and St. Patrick’s Day is celebrated throughout the month in our

March 6 Irish American Society of Nassau, Suffolk and Queens Parade steps off at 1 p.m. The parade assembles between Court House and Supreme Court Drives byDCounty Seat drive.

March 6 The Bethpage parade kicks off at 2 p.m. from Central to Stewart to Burkhardt Avenue and right down Broadway.

March 6

tion before turning west onto Main Street ending at Saint Patrick's Church.

March 13 The Center Moriches parade starts at 2 p.m. and runs on Main Street from Lake Avenue east to South Avenue.

March 19 The Rockville Centre parade starts at noon at Long Beach Rd. and Maple Ave., ending on North Village and Quealy Place.

The East Islip parade starts at 2 p.m. and travels west along Main Street to Irish Lane, past St. Mary’s Church at Main Street and Harrison Avenue.

March 19

March 12

March 19

The Cutchogue parade kicks off at 2 p.m. and runs down Route 25 starting at Cox Lane, ending at the Cutchogue Library.

March 12 The Bay Shore-Brightwaters parade starts at 2 p.m. at Saxon Ave. and Main Street left on Main Street/Montauk Highway.

March 12 The Westhampton Beach parade steps off at noon from Oneck Lane and Mill Road and run down Mill Road to Main Street.

March 12 32nd St. James parade kicks off at 1 p.m. along Lake Avenue from Woodlawn to Railroad Avenues.

March 13 The 26th Ronkonkoma parade kicks off at 2 p.m. along Portion Road to Hawkins Avenue up Church Street.

March 13 The Rocky Point/Miller Place parade starts at 1 p.m. at Rt. 25A and Harrison Ave. and ends at Broadway and Prince Road.

March 13 The Bayport-Bluepoint parade starts at 11 a.m. at Snedecor Avenue in Bayport.

March 13 The 82nd Huntington parade will start just north of the Huntington Train Sta-

various communities, with the famous New York City parade down Fifth Avenue being the largest and longest-running parade in the US. (NYC is also where the first recorded parade was held in 1762 when some Irish soldiers marched to celebrate the day). Trivia aside, here is 50+ LifeStyles’ list — in chronological order — of the area St. Patrick’s Day parades for 2016.

Patchogue Village parade starts at 10 a.m. on Route 112 and East Main Street and ends at West Ave. and W. Main.

The Hampton Bays parade starts at 11 a.m. at the Elementary School on Ponquogue Ave. and runs along Montauk Hwy. to the Hampton Atrium parking lot.

March 19

Jamesport’s 3rd parade will be held between 2 and 4 p.m. on Main Road between Washington Avenue and Manor Lane.

March 19

The Brentwood parade steps off at I p.m. from the intersection of Washington Ave. and Clarke St. and ends at Ross Park on Brentwood Road.

March 19 The Bellport parade kicks off at 11:30 fromStation Road and Head of the Neck, to Main St. to the Bellport Fire House.

March 20 Montauk’s parade will kick off from Edgemere Rd. at 11:30 a.m. to Main Street.

March 20 The Glen Cove parade kicks off at 1 p.m. at Forest Avenue, at the Finley Middle School, on to School Street.

March 20 The Farmingdale parade begins at 1 p.m. and starts at the Northside Elementary School on Powell Place ending at the Village Green on Main Street.

50+ LifeStyles March 2016 • 50PlusLifestyles.com

CLASSIFIED ADS Place your 50+ Lifestyles Personal Ad today! Email Barbara@50plusny.com

CLASSIFIED FORM

ADVERTISE YOUR PRODUCTS OR SERVICES $60 Businesses • $35 Individuals (Non-business related) 15 words - $1 each additional word

PERSONALS Retired F, 60, Seeking 60ish male, retired, movies, dining, travel, concerts, swimming, bowling, casinos. 631-320-4149 Positive, financially secure SWF, 64, trim, pretty seeks handy, helpful, optimistic SWM 54-74, to love. Enjoy the arts/nature, perhaps swim, sail, fish, bicycle, travel, explore. 631-3799477 BayportF@gmail.com FOR RENT Basement Apartment Mastic Area $1100 includes all. One bedroom, Large Walk In Closet, Kitchen, Dining Room, Living Room, Working Responsible Adult. No Smoking, No Pets, 1 Month Rent, 1 Month Secu-

rity. Available March 1st Call 631 3175534.

All ads must be pre-paid. Rates are per month. For more information call (631) 286-0058 Ext. 220. PLEASE PRINT CLEARLY OR TYPE ON A SEPARATE SHEET OF PAPER

PROF. SERVICES E. Patchogue, Health Caregiver with good references is available MF from 11am-1pm only. Will help your loved one shower, dress, cook, launder, etc. $30 visit (11am-1pm), 631-379-9477 (Clip ad & save). HOUSE CLEANER Nassau/Western Suffolk County. 20 Years experience. Call Barbara for estimate. References. 631-532-9310.

Classifieds need to be submitted by the 15th. Email: Barbara@50plusny.com

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DEAL ME IN

Kinship Doesn’t Count for Comps By Mark Pilarski

Casinos make billions by enticing players like you to hand over your hard-earned money. Thus, in the spirit of competition, casinos started offering comps to attract, and keep, loyal slot players. The knowledgeable player uses them to bargain for the best deals, along with lowering the house edge. Dear Mark: Sometimes I mistakenly use my dad’s Player’s card in a slot machine. Would I have any trouble getting a big payoff if they see the card isn't mine? – Wayne S. n just about every Player’s Club card brochure, you will find font size 4 print with these words: NON-TRANSFERABLE! Members may not distribute, lend or in any way allow another person to use their card. These “revocable” perks-for-play are a privilege granted by the casino in exchange for your father’s past and hopefully future action. When your dad tries to redeem points for comps, most casinos are going to want to see some photo identification. However, Wayne, that’s for the freebies. Regarding your question, I talked with a few fellow employees from yesteryear still working on the

50+ LifeStyles March 2016 • 50PlusLifestyles.com

inside; when it comes to the actual payoff of a jackpot, you will still be paid. They won’t though, issue comps to you by honoring his card. Here’s the kicker: They are going to comp you anyway for a feeding frenzy so that after you chow down, you will hook right back up to another machine allowing them a shot at getting some of their money back. Since comps are awarded based on the number of coins you cycle through a machine, you might as well get credit for all those quarters you insert. Just don’t commit the mistake far too many players make, to gamble to excess just to receive them. So being a slot player with the ability to “comp yourself,” you justifiably deserve your fair share of the billion-plus dollars casinos give away in comps each year. Just not on your dad’s card. That is not to say that in the real world (casino), countless spouses benefit from using

each other’s card and seldom get caught. While we’re at it, I also would recommend that you possess Player’s Cards from at least three different casinos. Casinos all too often change their comp guidelines and host personnel. If you have several casinos that you enjoy, you will never have to worry that any changes to their comp policy will ruin your gambling experience. By spreading your action, you will find that the various casinos offer distinctive bargains at different times of the day, week, month or year. One final thought since I am probably going to get this question multiple times after this column runs. The machine’s software within does know that you are using a Player’s card. But, using one does NOT, repeat, does NOT, have any effect on your outcome or the house edge. That’s a separate chip.

Age of Elegance By Ethel Bennett

New York Senior America Pageant When: Sunday, April 3, 2016 Where: John Adams Playhouse, Hofstra University, Hempstead, NY ou will not want to miss this annual spectacular event. Eleven women from the Metropolitan area will be competing for the title of Ms. New York Senior America. Each finalist has met the requirements of Personality, Philosophy of Life, Gown Presentation and Talent.

Celeste Belletti-Bronx

Dolores Hoffman-Island Park Doris Bodine-Cambria Heights

Jean Boyton- Mastic

Judith Berman-Massapequa Park

Gerry Russell-Glen Cove

Teri George-Medford

Marie Quigley-Long Beach

Paula Zdazenski-Commack

Shirley Darkeh-Westbury

Margarita Rojas-S. Richmond Hil

COUPON

All seats are reserved, call Dolores Meglio at 631-249-0258. Tickets will also be available at the theaters box office.

Women Must Be 60 Years or Over I would like to compete in the 2016 Ms. New York Senior America Pageant. Name

I am looking forward to being there in person to meet and greet you. A special thank you to Ed Mangano, Nassau County Executive and Victoria Meyerhoefer, Office of the Aging for their unparalleled support.

Telephone E-mail Address Return to: Marleen Schuss, State Director 80 Banks Avenue - Apt. 2113, Rockville Centre, NY 11570 Or e-mail: marleenschuss@aol.com Phone: 516-678-3242

Until next month, Ethel

it in the 1950s and 60s,” said Dr. Goodman, assistant professor of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences, Johns Hopkins School of Medicine and Director of Adult Attention Deficit Disorder Center of Maryland. “Regardless of age, people are relieved to hear they have a disorder whose treatment can improve daily living and satisfaction. They learn it is what they have (disorder) not who they are as a person.” The estimated number of people with ADHD over age 50 is 1.2 million that will grow to 2.5 million in 2050. In one study of ADHD adults aged 60-77 years, the mean age of ADHD diagnosis was 57 years. A survey of memory clinics demonstrated that only 1 in 5 are regularly screening for ADHD in older adults, thereby missing this treatable disorder. Older people concerned about cognitive problems may not be adequately evaluated for possible ADHD and may be misdiagnosed and mistreated. In another study, 63 percent of older adults diagnosed with ADHD reported being on medication while 23 percent had not been on med-

ADHD Over

in Adults

A First-Time Look

Address

ith the over-50 age population in the U.S. expected to rise from 43.1 million to 88.5 million by 2050, there will be a subset of older adults with cognitive complaints from ADHD who will be misdiagnosed and mistreated. No physician training has focused on ADHD persisting into the geriatric years. Despite decades of research on ADHD children and adults, the Goodman review (Goodman DW et al. Drugs and Aging, Dec 2015) draws attention to the paucity of research and the need to learn how persistent ADHD effects the functioning and quality of life of older adults. Depression and anxiety are often seen at higher rates in older adults with untreated ADHD. “The next clinical frontier in ADHD diagnosis and treatment will be older adults. Unfortunately, older adults with ADHD were rarely diagnosed as children since people didn’t considered

ication. The ADHD adults on medication reported a better ability to manage daily demands than those ADHD adults not on medication. The current research suggests that effective treatment improves daily functioning and quality of life. We want to encourage further research into nuanced evaluations and effective treatments specific for this age population. The presence of medical illnesses and medication add a layer of complexity to be overcome by well-trained physicians and mental health professional. Heightened awareness by the public will drive the increased demand for sophisticated evaluations and individualized treatment approaches. The Goodman literature review publication will start this discussion. Contact: David W. Goodman, M.D., FAPA;Dir., Adult Attention Deficit Disorder Center of Maryland; 410-583-2726 www.ADDadult.com Assistant Professor, Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences;J ohns Hopkins School of Medicine Johns Hopkins at Green Spring Station 10751 Falls Rd., Suite 306 Baltimore Maryland 21093 50+ LifeStyles March 2016 • 50PlusLifestyles.com

CROSSWORDS

Me & My Shadow

This is my greatniece Moriah with her great-grandfather (my father, Elwood Grier of Hempstead). He's the first person Moriah seeks whenever she comes to visit her greatgrandparent's home, and she stays by his side teaching him about varied subjects, such as recognizing letters of the alphabet, as well as, how to use the apps on her I-Pad. Moriah is definitely Elwood's shadow. HAVE A PICTURE OF YOU AND YOUR GRANDCHILD? Send it to: Me and My Shadow, 146 South Country Road, Bellport, NY 11713, or e-mail to: editor@50plusny.com and put Shadow in the “Subject” line.

Across 1 Whitewater craft 5 Basic sleeping apparatus 8 Rat- 12 Part of a continent; abbr. 13 Exist 14 Timbre 15 Created 16 Rise to the occasion? 18 Attack 20 “But don’t take it out on her” remedy 21 Senate wear 23 Emote 24 A biannual phenomena 28 It can be of death 31 A child’s card game 32 He had his own army Down 1 Indian god or avatar 2 Outrigger canoe part 3 Government men 4 If you don’t get tricks, you get 5 A lady of the evening 6 Iron’s first stage 7 Sandal manufacturer 8 What assault groups do 9 Requesting help; with “a call” 10 Against; prefix 11 Over 12 17 Popular food writer’s first name 19 A smidgen 22 11 Down skin disorders 24 Old sol

(Solution on page 4) 34 Propeller found on 1 Across 35 French seaside city 37 Lower extremity coverings 39 A hewing tool 41 Having shoes 42 Take off the market 45 Airborne African killer 49 According to Hillary it takes one to raise a child 51 Galway island group 52 Throw a gala for 53 Arab federation of seven 54 Dog from Kansas 55 Scores in rugby 56 2000 pounds in the US 57 Summers in 35 Across 25 Navy version of CIA 26 Your home turf 27 Legal age in some states 29 Droop 30 SAT takers; abbr. 33 Ids counterparts 36 Banishments 38 Conceive of 40 Often taught in night school; abbr. 42 Crazy, foolish 43 Always 44 Tight 46 An easy pace 47 Satisfy 48 Son of Seth 50 Congressional watchdog

50+ LifeStyles March 2016 • 50PlusLifestyles.com

(Solution on page 4)

50+ LifeStyles March 2016 â&#x20AC;˘ 50PlusLifestyles.com