Issue 14 by Recovery Wire

January February 2015

FRIENDLY

How to be GRATEFUL

F IR E What happens when counsellors

WhenYou’reNot Learning to develop an ‘attitude of gratitude ‘

are the ones getting triggered?

DRUNK DRIVING D AMES Female drunk drivers are a huge threat to public safety

‘Pharmageddon’

DoctorAssistedSuicide? How can we start to undo the pharmaceudical epidemic?

TOP 10 RECOVERY MOVIES

HONEST YOUTH, IN A DISHONEST WORLD

Image by Kai Engel Image by Franziska Geiser Image by Bex Ross

LETTER FROM THE EDITOR Motion, or the need to be in motion is one of the features that binds our community together. But is it a curse, or one of nature’s surprising little gifts?

TOP 10 RECOVERY MOVIES This is our list of the best recovery films. Some of them are about substance addiction, some are about sex, love, food or gambling addiction, but they’re all inspiring and enlightening in one way or another.

HOW TO BE GRATEFUL WHEN YOU’RE NOT Darlene Lancer, author of “Conquering Shame and Codependency” gives valuable insights on how to see optimism and appreciate your circumstances, regardles of the challenges you’re facing.Let’s learn how to be grateful, despite our environment.

‘PHARMAGGEDON’ Doctors perscriptions are being doled out in epic preportions and overdoses are on the rise. There is a war afoot, and the casualties are piling up. Which side are you on?

FRIENDLY FIRE Utilizing outside resources is a common thread in recovery, but what happens when the resource is the one getting triggered?

DRUNK DRIVING DAMES Drunk driving might be an old issue, and perhaps it even appears to be leveling out, according to the latest statistics. But there is one group of drunk drivers being overlooked, despite the obvious demographic spike. Are women getting overlooked as the latest risk group?

RAISING HONEST YOUTH IN A DISHONEST WORLD Has honesty been bled from the fabric of our society so subtly that we don’t even recognize a lie from a truth? How are we to raise our youth to hold values we might unknowingly be lacking?

afor people magazine living in recovery

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LETTER FROM THE EDITOR Issue 14, January/February 2015 Editor In Chief Dee Christensen dee@recoverywiremagazine.com Contributing Writers Darlene Lancer JD, MFT Kimberly-Robyn Covey Dr. Vera Tarman M.D. Caroline Taplin, MSW Terrence Daryl Shulman, JD,LMSW,ACSW,CAADC,CPC Cover Illustration by Hartwig HKD Published 6 Times Yearly: January/February, March/April, May/June, July/August, September/October, November/December Mailing Address 360A Bloor Street West P.O. Box 68506 Walmer Toronto, ON M5S 3C9 1.416.922.9227 Reprints For permission to print any portion of this magazine requests should be sent to: info@recoverywiremagazine.com

There is an old idea in recovery that one never stands still; we are either moving forward or backward. I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t say I agree entirely, I do think sometimes we coast intermittently along the tarmac between takeoffs. But the concept that there is a constant motion within us, which aspires to be in flight, makes perfect sense to me. In the beginning I saw it merely as my addiction. I related it to a monster that wanted me to let my guard down; drop my feet to the floor so it could snatch me under the bed like my childhood boogieman. It was a looming force, and without careful attention or distraction, it would surely achieve its aim. As I evolved in my recovery though, I began seeing it as more of a life force, which is dulcet and composed for some, but stirring and eager for others. I imagined addicts were the latter category, having to adjust to a life force that craved momentum and was not fettered by the steepest of descent. Ours is a life force that holds lineage with the wildest parts of nature: thunderstorms, fire, untamed vines of lush ivy and most poignantly - the dragonfly. The dragonfly is a most fascinating insect. It has inhabited this planet for nearly 300 million years, and yet it is still tied to penitent folklore, and bad publicity. The dragonfly is one of the fastest flying insects in the world, gifted with the ability to change direction in mid-air, hover, fly in reverse, fly upside down, and move up to 45

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There is no point at which you can say, “Well, I’m successful now. I might as well take a nap.” - Carrie Fisher

miles per hour. And yet, the dragonfly holds absolutely no aptitude for simply walking. If it moves, it moves quickly. And when tempted, it is nature’s perfect predator. Despite its unsuspecting appearance, the dragonfly has skill far beyond its means. When it has a mission – look out! Science is baffled by the tenacity and ability of this insect. It is a brilliant pursuer. It does not track and chase its mark, like most other species. It calculates the angle and timing of its targets approach, allowing its prey to stumble into its clutches haplessly. When it utilizes its talents, it holds the ability of something much more advanced. If it’s looking for some, oh it’ll get some! A lion or a shark will catch up to half their prey, but the tiny dragonfly will capture nearly all. Part of their skillset lay in their eyes, which allow them to focus unyieldingly at only one thing at a time, while all other distractions fade unnoticed. They have a selective attention span; a ferocious appetite and they have a death-grip making it difficult for them to let go of that which they aspire to attain. Indeed, the dragonfly has held many a viscous title among the mainstream: “Devil’s needle”, “Water witch”, “Devil’s horse”, “Snake killer”. Norwegian children believed they would poke holes in their eardrums, and the Swedish believed they would sew their eyelids shut. And while it is true, part of a dragonfly’s nature is feral

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and dangerous, it is also known to be one of the most inspiring little creatures alive. It is tenacious: precise. Its iridescent wings make it intoxicating and its momentum makes it worthy of followers. It is powerful and poised, and however lethal it can be, it is equally as creative and pure. In its short lifespan, it never gives up. No matter the climate, on land or at sea, the dragonfly will push itself, uninhibited, until its last breath. Motion is a gift. Our need or instinct to be in motion is not a curse. Motion exists in nature, with or without us. Some are not drawn to mimic the wind, while others cannot wait to be set free in it. There will always be a balance. And with this knowledge, what will you do with your drive to soar? Indeed, you might be misunderstood; whilst others remain stationary it is baffling that we make a home in motion. We are driven to learn (to hover), to sing (to fly backward), to paint (to fly upside down), to climb, to see, to lead, to build, to chase. We are powerful and intoxicating. We are unsuspecting, and indeed, life is short. You can do more than it makes sense that you should be capable of, but don’t worry about sensibility. Leave that to the grasshoppers.

Dee Christensen Editor in Chief Background image by Bazar del Bizzarro

TOP 10

RecovERY MOVIES Image by Jo達o Lavinha

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CLEAN AND SOBER

Clean and Sober is a great film for anyone who struggles to understand the mind of an alcoholic. This film gives an honest account of what it’s like stumbling along the fence between vice and victory. Keaton’s performance is rock solid, and Morgan Freeman does a stellar job of playing a stoic long-timer, waiting for the newbie to finally surrender. If you’re feeling like you’re the only one struggling, and you’re starting to forget why you cleaned up in the first place, this is a great film to help you ‘Remember When.’

GREENFINGERS

Clive Owen plays a convicted criminal who develops a green thumb behind bars. This touching story, although not directly about addiction, is certainly about recovery. This is an incredibly inspiring redemption story. It’s about finding yourself amidst stronger opposing forces, despite all odds. If you’re stuck in that dreaded phase of your recovery where it feels like you’ll never be seen for anything other than the worst version of yourself… it’s time to watch Greenfingers. It’s sure to inspire, and cause a few well deserved belly laughs.

2. JOURNAL

BASKETBALL DIARIES

This isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t an easy film to watch, it may not be the right movie for a newbie, at least not until you get your footing. This is a raw and gripping account of the dark and tangled lives we lead in the trenches. Ever wonder what it was like for your family? This film gives one of the most profound close-ups of the utter heartbreak our loved ones must endure in order to spare themselves. The ending is a hopeful one, but some of the scenes will stick with you for life, which might be a good thing.

THE HONOUR OF ALL

This Canadian indie film is a profound story about the impact of alcoholism on the Alkali Lake Indian Band. It is the moving true story of an entire community suffering from addiction, and their transformation to becoming an entire community in recovery. Narrated by the Bands chief, Andy Chelsea traces the roots of addiction back to the fur trade days, and then through the struggles of sobering an entire collective of sufferers. The film is a triumphant tale that has become a cult classic in Canada.

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STRENGTHENING YOUR RECOVERY WITH

We know that the hardest part of recovery begins right after your treatment ends. That is why we have created a network of community-based supports and services, to help you build a recovery that is strong enough to last a lifetime. At Hope Place Centres, many of us have ‘been there’ and our own lived-experience makes us great when it comes to knowing what it takes to succeed in early recovery. It makes no difference whether your journey began in one of our treatment programs or someplace else; what really matters is the BIG difference that ‘HOPE’ can make in your recovery today. Reach out and connect with ‘HOPE’ right now by email at info@hopeplacecentres.org or give us a call toll-free at 1.877.761.6357

hopeplacecentres.org ‘Healing Trauma CONNECTIONS (Shame & Resiliency) ‘A Woman’s Way through the 12 Steps’ ‘A Man’s Way through the 12 Steps’ Living Sober

Parenting Basics Sober Moms Women’s Peer-Support Group Men’s Peer-Support Group

Couples and Family Counselling ‘Family & Friends Peer-Support Group’ NADA Auricular (Ear) Acupuncture Yoga

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Lbs.

This Sundance Film Festival selection is a sobering story about the struggles of food addiction. A lovable 300-pound Italian man decides he wants to overcome his addiction to food after suffering a heart attack. He decides to move to the country, away from family and temptation. He convinces a friend to come along, who suffers a different kind of addiction. This film gives viewers an inside look at the dynamics of living with an addiction to food, and the challenges and differences this vice inflicts compared to more common afflictions.

OWNING MAHOWNY

This is the true story of Dan Mahowny, a Canadian Banker with a serious casino gambling addiction. This film gives light to the insidious and relentless hunger of active addiction. Mahowny embezzles more than ten million dollars to feed his gambling addiction, and despite how out of control he is, to the people outside his compulsion he is an honest coworker and a loving partner. If you ever wanted an inside look or a reminder of the lengths a gambling compulsion can take you, this is the film for you.

2. JOURNAL

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THANKS FOR SHARING

A film about stage-two for a recovering sex addict. This film follows four realistic characters who have entered into recovery from sex addiction and now face the special challenges only an addict of this sort can relate to. There is a unique harshness to the judgment sex addicts live with, and this film does a great job of displaying cross-addictions and family dynamics as well. This is a great flick on it’s own, but if you’re in recovery it might even give you a healthy pause.

THE FIGHTER

If you’re about to do a step-four, this great film to curl up to. Not only is acting and directing a privilege but this also provides a haunting close-up of quintessential toxic family.

is a the film the

Enmeshed relationships, codependency, addiction and a terrifically controlling mother; this film might be the catalyst you need to finally let go of the past, in all it’s juicy domestic insanity.

2. JOURNAL

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LOVE ADDICT

We hear the words, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Love Addictâ&#x20AC;? and most of us shrug. How bad could that be? How much trouble could it cause? This film documents the true tales of a group of people suffering from love addiction; their pain, their habits, their suffering. If you are in recovery, and you catch glimpses of a less than healthy version of yourself where love is concerned, it might be enlightening to catch an inside glimpse at how bad things could get if you do not keep yourself in check.

10.

THE ANONYMOUS PEOPLE

This is a stellar documentary about living in recovery and the importance of no longer remaining silent about it. This film highlights the challenges and tragedies facing the addiction community, and points out a hopeful reality: our numbers could turn the tides overnight, if we showed up for the fight. If you knew your face, your voice could make a difference, would you remain one of the anonymous people?

2. JOURNAL

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Dianne Piaskoski BComm, BSc, MMath, MA

but’terfly effect` The “butterfly effect”is a term in chaos theory that depicts how one small change (the flap of a butterflies wings) in one place can result in a large and unpredictable change (a hurricane, say) in another place. The same can be true when we make small changes in our lives.

Addictions Counselling (416) 522-9421 dianne@butterfly-effect.ca www. butterfly-effect.ca

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By Darlene Lancer JD, MFT Author of “Codependency for Dummies” and “Conquering Shame and Codependency”

How to be

GRATEFUL when you're not 14 Abundance by Hartwig HKD

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Many North Americans struggling with health, financial, or emotional problems find it challenging to feel grateful around Thanksgiving. Some people always have a habit of looking at the negative. One reason for this is that our brains are predisposed to solve problems, and we take what makes us comfortable for granted.

turn out as you desire. This, according to Buddha, is the cause of suffering.

The sages also knew that gratitude actually shifts your perspective from feeling depressed, envious, angry, or self-pity to a happier mood. It can open your heart to joy and generosity because you begin to feel that you’re blessed. Moreover, how you view your circumstances determines your ability to manage and overcome them. Often it’s worry or anxiety about the future that colours how you see a situation. Negative emotions limit your imagination and ability to cope and solve problems. Hence, your state of mind ultimately is more important than All world religions stress the importance of gratitude. In your outer experience. Judaism, prayers of gratefulness are an essential component of worship, which orthodox Jews recite one hundred times a day. Gratitude was referred to by Martin Luther as a “basic Christian attitude.” The Quran states that the grateful will be given more. Moslem believers are encouraged to give thanks five times a day. Sufi, Hindu, and Buddhist traditions also emphasize giving thanks.

Religion

Moreover, religion exhorts that you should be grateful notwithstanding your current problems and circumstances – not to deny them, but in addition and in spite of them. To feel gratitude only when you feel good is considered narrowminded. In the Bible, Paul teaches, “In everything give thanks.” The Hebrew Midrash instructs, “In pleasure or pain, give thanks!” Islamic tradition says that those who give thanks in every circumstance will be the first to enter paradise.

Why Be Grateful? The mystic, Meister Eckhart believed that thanking God was the most important prayer. Prophets and monks know that gratitude brings you closer to God. Even if you’re not religious, gratitude enables you to see your life in a larger context beyond your immediate troubles. It expands your experience of life and counteracts an ego-centered contraction and preoccupation with losses, fears, and wants. Being grateful only when good things happen reinforces your ego’s demand that good things happen, setting up greater disappointment when things don’t

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“Nothing is either good or bad. It’s thinking that makes it so.” ~ Ben Franklin

Cultivating an attitude of acceptance enables you to feel grateful even when you’re in pain. It’s helpful to view all experience as an opportunity to grow and learn. Wrote Helen Keller, “Everything has its wonders, even darkness and silence, and I learn whatever state I may be in, therein to be content.” Rather than seeing yourself as a victim of circumstance, acceptance of reality and developing gratitude for what you do have, verses focusing on what you don’t, empowers you to take appropriate action. With the advent of the positive psychology movement, gratitude was only recently subjected to empirical research. What religion has known for millennia, science has confirmed. Numerous studies suggest that grateful people are more likely to have higher levels of happiness and sense of well-being and lower levels of stress and depression. This naturally translates into better physical health.

Be sure to check out Darlene Lancer’s NEW BOOK! This essential guide explores the powerful emotion of shame, what can happen if it is not addressed, and provides practical advice on how to break deep-rooted patterns.

Now available at Amazon!

Developing an Attitude of GRATITUDE Gratitude comes more easily to some than others. When you’re discouraged or weighed down with negative thoughts, there are several things you can do to develop an attitude of gratitude:

1. There’s wisdom in the phrase, “Count your blessings.” Listing the things for which you’re grateful can generate feelings of appreciation and gratitude. It’s often suggested to write them down on a daily basis. You can start with the fact that you have a brain, can write, and can read. Add small things, for example: seeing a 16

child smile, receiving affection from a pet or greeting from a co-worker, or accomplishing a task, such as doing laundry, or taking a walk. After several days, you’ll begin to look for things to add to your list and find that your mood significantly improves – faster than taking an anti-depressant. 2. Read your list to someone. Sharing you grateful feelings doubles the effect. Arrange to regularly share you grateful lists and give thanks together. Praying together heightens your sense of connectedness and wellbeing. 3. Go deep into silence. Relax, and stay mindful of the present moment, feeling your breath and body. Feel gratitude for the aliveness in your body. 4. Express thanks daily. Doing so out loud has more power. In the morning and evening, and before meals, recite www.recoverywiremagazine.com

prayers of gratitude, or just say “Thank you (God).” 5. Thank others throughout the day for their help, particularly people you don’t ordinarily thank, such as cashiers. This is a recognition that you depend upon many people in order to survive and acknowledges your interdependent existence. The same is implicit in saying grace for the labor that goes into food on your table. 6. Compliment people. Giving compliments shows appreciation and lifts others’ mood and yours. 7. Put notes on your refrigerator, mirrors, and computer to remind you to be thankful. 8. Think about people you appreciate. The act of visualizing them with positive feelings opens your heart to gratitude. 9 Write people unexpected thank you notes. Writing your appreciation prompts loving feelings that engender gratitude. 10. Do small acts of generosity, such as giving someone your place in line, helping someone pay for a purchase, or bringing food to a neighbor. 11. Thank yourself at the end of the day for things you did well. List at least three things. They may be small and include the above acts of gratitude. In time, you’ll notice a change in your mood until your “cup runneth over” – or, at least appear half full rather than half empty.

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By Kimberley-Robyn Covey Image by Grzesiek

â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;' Pharmageddon' Doctor Assisted Suicide?

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In 2004 Eugene K was an exhausted addict. At 42 years of age he had been through a gamut of treatment centres; rehabs, therapy, and prison. His two sons, (then 13 and 16 years old) barely saw him, because he was rarely sober enough to keep visit dates with them. He saw psychiatrists regularly and spent a lot of time in mental health facilities. Eugene was that hopeless type of addict/alcoholic we hear about, the type who really could not stop self-medicating. Although he tried many different measures to stop and all he wanted was to be a good father to his kids, nothing worked. A true case of absolute powerlessness, his illness completely consumed him, and everyone in the medical profession who was involved with him knew it.

call from Eugene’s girlfriend. Heartbroken, she told them the sad news, that their dad had been found dead in his rooming house, and that it looked like he had been dead for at least four or five days. The family is still grateful for that spontaneous Halloween party, which prevented his children from being the ones to find his body.

The autopsy report confirmed what we (his family), already knew. He had succumbed to a drug overdose of his prescription pills. Sadly, although he killed himself, he really wasn’t trying to die. He was simply a sick, active addict caught in the throes of his illness. He had been medically prescribed his drug of no-choice. He was a classic example of a too common occurrence There had been so many incidents over the years in our new ‘Pharmageddon’ world; a struggling, when Eugene had physically injured himself while out of control addict, well known by doctors, being high on pills and booze, and he had to be rushed to prescribed with an ongoing supply of opiates and left the hospital. There were so many psychotic episodes to his own devices. An inadvertent form of “Doctor resulting from being on prolonged pill-benders, assisted suicide.” Shocked? Well hold on to your hat… which would end with Eugene being locked down in a Eugene is only one among thousands who die mental institution. There was actually a time when Eugene was so high on painkillers that he broke into similar tragic deaths: preventable deaths, which a drugstore to steal valium, only to fall asleep on the occur every year in this country. Canada’s overdose floor, thus resulting in a 30-day ‘“drying out” period death rate from prescription pills has mushroomed at in jail. Eugene had a frightening problem of getting an alarming speed. According to the Canadian Drug so high on his pills and booze that he would be in a Policy Coalition’s (CDPC) latest report, at least half of complete mental fog , unable to remember how many all drug-related deaths in this country are attributed to pills he had already taken, yet still continuing to pop misuse and abuse of prescriptions. them compulsively. The CDPC Report continues to say that this dramatic For some unknown reason, his doctors continued increase in overdoses is a direct result of “an explosion prescribing the same drugs to Eugene. In fact, the in prescriptions for opiates.” This explosion is grimly trend was that Eugene would consume his prescription illustrated in statistics that show a whopping 850% in a record amount of time, and then show up at the increase in Oxycodone prescriptions in Ontario alone, clinic with a crazy excuse, begging for another script between 1991 and 2007. In obvious relation to the (which he pretty well always managed to get), time increase in prescriptions, there was a 242% increase in opioid overdose deaths between 1991 and 2010; after time. from 12.2 deaths per-million people to 41.6 deaths On Friday October 29th, Eugene’s two boys were per-million in 2010. Currently, between 300 and 400 planning on going to visit their father at his new place. people die each year in Ontario from a prescription At the last minute their plans changed, and they opioid overdose. decided to have a Halloween party at home, and invite “Pharmageddon” is upon us. their friends. Three days later they received a horrible

This massive pandemic of opioid over-prescription, the dramatic increase in pill addiction, and the skyrocketing overdose fatality rate has been dubbed “Pharmageddon.” The name comes from the title of a book written by David Healy about the prescription drug epidemic in America. Pharmageddon is defined as “the prospect of a world in which medicines produce more ill-health than health, and when medical progress does more harm than good”.

addiction. Columbia University’s Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA) conducted a survey that clearly revealed that doctors are very poorly trained to recognize and treat addiction.

In this survey, 979 US physicians were interviewed from various age groups and practice settings. Only 19 percent of these doctors acknowledged being trained in medical school to recognize situations where prescribed drugs were not being taken by the person Judging from the high number of addict funerals for whom the drugs were prescribed (diversion). we’ve been hearing about lately, it seems that this state of affairs is no longer a “prospect.” It is here. Approximately 40 percent of the physicians surveyed Pharmageddon has arrived and continues to be fueled had received some training related to being able to by indiscriminate prescribing. What are these doctors recognize prescription drug abuse, but the majority thinking? How could this have happened? of that number received only a few hours of training during their four years of medical school. Here is the Most Doctors Don’t Understand Addiction real shocker: In the old days we were taught that the doctor always knew best. We assumed our doctor knew about our illness, and understood how to help us. In most fields of medicine this is a very realistic belief. It is true that wonderful, gifted, and experienced medical practitioners abound in Canada. We are blessed with a healthcare system staffed with thousands of dedicated and knowledgeable professionals. Whenever I seek medical help for a physical ailment I generally have great confidence that the doctor will have been trained in my issue. I trust that she or he has studied books about it, has seen diagrams, and has performed the procedures related to the problem.

Only 55 percent of the doctors interviewed said they were taught how to properly prescribe controlled substances like narcotic painkillers, barbiturates and opiates and even then most of the 55 percent had less than two hours of training… And if that’s bad, pray tell, what about the other 45 percent that had no training? Dr Jana Burson is a prominent physician specializing in opiate addiction. In the recovery field for over 10 years, she answers questions about addiction and treatment on her website, Janaburson’s blog. In one of her posts she further confirms these shocking facts by sharing her own medical school experience. She remembers that her group, at least, had one small course section on alcoholism and the students were However, addiction doesn’t present like a physical sent to one AA meeting to see how 12 step groups cancer, or a broken leg. There are no diagrams or worked. But she doesn’t recall ever receiving any text illustrating the physiology of the problem. It is instruction on how to identify drug abuse, or any not something doctors can see on an X-ray. Doctors guidelines on prescribing controlled drugs. may see the symptoms; the track marks, the black lung spots, the cirrhosis, the lives in turmoil, but they Further statistics in the CASA study described on can’t see the real problem. It is an invisible illness and Dr. Burson’s blog showed that thirty percent of US all the medical books in the world cannot explain the doctors in residence still received no training on how internal spiritual malady that is an integral factor in to prescribe controlled substances. As the Doctor certain levels of addiction. noted; that means that nearly a third of the doctors surveyed, who were leaving residency and prepared to If most physicians truly understood the phenomena practice upon the human masses, had NO training on of craving experienced by addicts and the resulting how to prescribe these dangerous drugs. Wow. irresistible, relentless drive to satiate that craving Canada, no different. would they still really prescribe a bottle full of oxycodone for a “known” addict to take “as prescribed” Here in Canada we are in the same predicament. without supervision? Our physicians are poorly educated in identifying and treating addiction and in treating chronic pain Research shows that most medical schools don’t with controlled substances. In a report produced place much importance on educating physicians about by McMaster University, The Canadian Center for

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Substance Abuse and the Michael DeGroote National Pain Center, it is stated: “Addiction is an illness which is particularly problematic when the substances of abuse are prescription medications which became available through well-intended increased prescribing to treat pain. In both cases - pain and addiction - the underlying clinical entity is not well understood, is poorly taught in healthcare professional training programs, and treatment is hampered by poor availability of best practice treatment programs” Despite the fact that prescription drug related deaths now outnumber deaths from heroin and cocaine combined, as well as deaths from HIV, pneumonia, and alcohol poisoning, there is still no great emphasis on preventative training for prescribers. In some cases there even exists an attitude of ambivalence, irresponsibility, and sheer indifference from doctors towards addicts. In Nova Scotia, for example, in one of three recent news stories about sanctioning doctors for overprescribing, there was a startling case where a doctor - in practice for 43 years - wrote a prescription for a nine month supply of Dilaudid for a patient that he knew was undergoing methadone treatment for drug addiction. It came to light only because the local pharmacist was concerned about filling the prescription for 2,360 eight milligram tablets and decided to notify the appropriate officials. It stands to reason that if doctors are poorly educated about addiction, then they would have equally poor practices in their dealing with addicts. On her blog, Dr. Burson tells of how addicted patients were treated dismissively, scorned by doctors in her residency program. She describes the resident physicians as being angry and disgusted with addicted patients. These people were not viewed as individuals struggling with an illness or disorder; rather, they were looked down upon and treated more like criminals than patients. A large percentage of medical professionals still view addicts as bad, immoral people who simply persist in getting high, who are making a choice to use or drink. The whole powerless piece of real addiction is quite often beyond the understanding of a general physician. The frightening reality of a person who desperately desires to quit yet lacks the power to stop, is sadly beyond the scope of many.

How can we start to undo the damage? When properly administered, prescription drugs can be a vital part of an individual’s health plan or an effective solution for the management of acute pain, cancer related pain, and terminal conditions. No one in pain should ever be deprived of relief. We know that physicians have no magic powers that enable them to know whether a patient is an active addict or even prone to addiction. Quite often while in the grips of the disease, addicts will lie and manipulate unsuspecting doctors to get prescriptions. Setting aside these type of incidents, however, Canadian doctors still need to be accountable and responsible regarding how they prescribe. To facilitate best practices in this field, our doctors and medical practitioners need much more comprehensive study around addiction and a deeper understanding of what it really means to be an addict or alcoholic and to understand the accompanying internal condition that characterizes addiction. To reduce the current astronomical number of unnecessary overdoses and prevent future addiction, the rate of prescribing opioids and narcotics MUST be lowered. Physicians must re-evaluate their prescription practices; how freely these drugs are prescribed, how often, how quickly doses are increased. Prescribing pills can no longer be an automatic response to complaints of physical discomfort. Attention must be drawn to other avenues of pain management where appropriate. Open acknowledgement of the problem is always a first step toward a solution. We need to make awareness of the devastating effects of over-prescribing a priority. When a celebrity dies of a drug overdose everyone buzzes about it for awhile, then the issue fades off and everyone forgets about it. But for every celebrity drug overdose there are thousands of others, just like Eugene, whose deaths go unnoticed. May we learn from these tragedies so that future deaths can be prevented and fewer families will experience the horror and pain of losing their loved ones. This article is dedicated to all the casualties of Pharmageddon including the memory of Eugene Kennedy (1961- 2004). He was not a star, not a celebrity. He played guitar in a local band and was just another guy with kids who loved him … and a great smile. RIP, Eugene.

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By Dr. Vera Tarman M.D. Expert in the field of addictions, and author of the book: The Truth About Food Addiction: Food Junkies

FRIENDLY Image by Pascal/Flikr

FIRE When the Counsellor Gets Triggered “Seeing the pipes, giving out clean needles, well… it is a trigger. I mean, why can they have drugs, and I can’t?” She shrugged. I started to get worried. Mandy is telling me how she is tempted to use again, even though she has been clean for nine months, and has a great job at a shelter. I feel impressed with how far she has come in the last year; when I first met her, she was begging on the streets with her dog. Her family is ecstatic about the changes she has made. And Mandy’s self confidence has soared, I don’t think she has ever felt this good about herself. Working at a shelter is gratifying, she keeps telling me, since she is helping her people. How good can it get? Now, the job just seems to be a threat to her sobriety. I think about the many times I have gotten triggered myself. Once a man was telling me how much he drank each night, and I found myself daydreaming about my own late night drinking, down in the basement with my DVDs and music. I remembered another young man, pony tail and jeans, who reminded me of my 1960s. He was talking about drugs I had never even heard of. He cited chemical names and I couldn’t help but get curious: Were these drugs like acid? Or pot? Or what? Then a thought slithered across my mind, “Well,

why not check it out?” I had to get up and grab my stethoscope. “Stay focused!” I reprimanded myself. “What should I be doing right now? Where was my mind going all of a sudden?” Then, a few weeks ago, I visited the local harm reduction clinic. The new Naltrexone kits (that could save someone from an opiate overdose) were out and I wanted to know how they worked, since I planned to distribute them myself. There I sat, with the counsellor, both us leaning into each other, looking intently at the clean kit of needles and pipes. He was showing me how to clean the pipe, and it struck me as we stared at his fingers rubbing the wire mesh, that we were both holding our breath. I could feel the air of excitement vibrating in the tiny room - it felt as if we both were getting ready to get high. “Whoa!” I thought… “what is this about?” I don’t think my experiences are unusual. Six months ago, a very large man sat on my examining table. I had looked at his face, at the large pores and redness of his nose, and tried to imagine him as my counsellor. He didn’t seem like the kind of guy I would want to tell my troubles to. But he worked in a treatment center

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and was boasting about his stable of clients who all loved him and his staff who always asked him for help. They trusted him, he said, because he knew addiction and addicts - he had been an active alcoholic himself for years. Then after a number of years in recovery, he relapsed - on Listerine. It hadn’t occurred to him to drink this type of potent alcohol until a client told him about her experience with that and hand sanitizer. Drinking this stuff was easy, he told me, because it did not smell like beer or liquor. It was okay to smell of mouthwash because he smoked and could tell his clients that he wanted to take away the bad breath of cigarettes. The job had got to him, he sighed, the stress of working with clients finally pushed him over the edge. So here he was, seeking treatment for his one large bottle-a-day Listerine habit. As I listened to his story, I wondered idly, which flavour he chose, spearment or cinnamon, and which one I would have picked. It is around me every day, the thoughts of using, relapses, war stories, the buffet of choices of how to get high - how could I not

have these thoughts seep into my consciousness on a regular basis? Ask someone who is newly clean and sober what job they want and chances are pretty good that they will tell you that they want to be an addictions counsellor. It makes sense; why not use what you know to help others get clean? People often want to do this work even if they are not clean; some even think it might help them get clean. That isn’t my experience. Last week, I heard yet again about another guy who just finished his college addictions program and volunteer placement. Now, he is dead, quite likely from an overdose. He did not make it to my examining table. This isn’t unusual. In fact, I wonder why relapses don’t happen more often than they do in this field. Do the teachers and fellow counsellers warn people about what it is like to replay your old life over and over and over, with every new addict you see?

By Caroline Taplin MSW UK-based MSW; published writer and blogger committed to women’s rights and reclaiming the words “recovery” and “sober” as synonymous with “resilience” and “strength”. Current social media maven for www.focus12.co.uk and cofounder @UKchallenge4change non-profit charity challenges to help you get your woof back. Image by Gisela Giardino

Drunk Driving Dames Image by James Palinsad

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Scotland has reduced its drink-driving limit, and while some haled this as the way forward, some still shouted for a zero limit. I’m confident a quiet group of people, (myself included) knew, if only subconsciously, that any limit was realistically not their limit all of the time – increasingly women. Now why is that even a surprise? Ever replaced the offer of tea or coffee with a glass of wine? Scoffed at Nigella’s suggestion of using leftover wine in cooking? Even marvelled at those apparently “novelty” glasses that hold a bottle of wine? As if I could possibly drink a bottle! We women need to face it - we have been duped by the rebranding of mother’sruin to mummy’s “juice” (genuinely what a friend calls wine when talking to her son). Ruin though isn’t always that far behind our perfect pinot pleasures.

on our roads.” (Brake.org.uk) Yet how many women looked at those images and didn’t think they looked too bad or joked that orange jumpsuits are a difficult look to carry off.

United Kingdom research funded by the Rees Jeffries Road Foundation and Direct Line Insurance Group (reported in The Guardian, 9th September 2014) found that the number of women convicted for drink driving related offences rose from 9% in 1998 to 17% by 2012, a percentage increase of almost double. The research focused on the drinking habits of women in general, and the findings are striking with as many as 60% of women polled admitting to not knowing the legal limit and many even going so far as to say that they felt they could drink more than the “average” person before As I set down ‘Rules of Inheritance’ by Claire Bidwell- being unable to drive. Explanations routinely offered Smith, I wondered if Jennifer Lawrence’s film version where “family crisis” related or “I needed to move would include all the drinking and driving or duck the my car in the morning” all holding onto the image of issue. I was struck by how commonplace jumping in the women as carers and nurturers. car after a swift (or in most cases, not so swift) few was in the book. The winding road home, the knowing that Just as we’ve packed away the tinsel for another we’re over the limit but feeling safe enough to drive… year, so too does law enforcement pack away the daily or more realistically, uncertainty about getting home sight of breathalyser and speed guns. A new year so feeling less safe by not driving. bringing renewed hope for many, but for an increasing number of women the future is circled with a large red Women and drink driving has largely flown under the court date...their first, my first. So what is leading the radar. The United States, Canada, and United Kingdom sharp increase in otherwise law abiding women coming have seen a steady reduction in drink driving arrests. into the criminal justice system? DringDrivingStats.org reported a 30% reduction in the United States and the majority remain men, as seen in I’m going to put it out there - an assumption or many of the television ads or images of the neglident hypothesis if you will – the Brechtian theatrical drink driver. What the stats are now seen to believe, concept of “suspension of disbelief”…we know what is that while there is an overall reduction, there are we know, until we choose to unknow it. Women drink three pocket groups where the opposite is the case: and drive knowing they are over the limit, choosing men aged 21 to 34, binge drinkers (four or more drinks) not to know or to explain. The campaigns targeting and women in their 30’s and 40’s. In 2011, women women are few, so drink driving isn’t a lady thing. We accounted for nearly 1/4 of DUI arrests with Lindsay are a calories campaign which perversely moves many Lohan and Paris Hilton offering their au naturel mug onto lower calorie spirits. A bottle of wine is harmful shots for alternative poster campaigns. The fact binge drinking yet how many adverts of the “Blossom remains that drink driving is “one of the biggest killers Hill” kind introduce our favourite show, “Wine and

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Chocolate.” Drink at home alone and drink in groups when out and just to help, we’ll make a bottle of wine cheaper than two glasses and a damn sight cheaper then three Cokes. I challenge the 60% don’t knows – I really do. By a silent show of hands, who has never driven whilst over the legal limit? There are definite arguments made for having no alcohol if you’re driving as many say it’s not the amount but what the amount does to you. True. There is indeed a legal limit, but this doesn’t capture impairment or even how quickly your body deals with alcohol. Eating a heavy meal to gird your stomach for the onslaught ahead is in fact a phallacy - fat trumps alcohol to the digestibles meaning you’ll feel great for longer, but alcohol metabolises more slowly. My belief (and shoot me down in flames if this is too out there) is that every woman who has ever finished a bottle of wine in one sitting - with a friend, if you like - has driven over the limit. I say this neither to normalise nor excuse. I certainly would never minimise the potential for harm caused. What I do say is there’s a disconnect in the recovery community where often women will record in detail their anxious lives around alcohol but then, as an adjunct disclaimer, feel the need to firm up the fact they’d never drink drive or drink in front of their children. “I drink when my children are in bed” may be true, but is there the tiniest bit of rush to get them off, and you to get stuck into your real evening... your me time? “I drink x amount most nights after the kids are asleep but never drink drive” even though basic maths shows that their general consumption, plus tonight’s top up, plus when started, minus when finished...doesn’t add up to a whole lot of nothing.

According to Bill, who runs drink driving courses in the United Kingdom - women pretend to be in denial. We know it’s wrong but do it anyway, then expect different treatment when we’re caught. We have been targeted relentlessly by Chardonnay and Spirits all vying to make drinking copious amounts appear to be a feminist statement not the harsh reality of increased susceptibility of liver damage and conviction. We know this but now pour Bailey’s into tumblers. Our bodies are designed differently than just booblets and gardens – we don’t metabolise alcohol all that well with how you ‘feel’ being more a state of mind than a true conversation with your boiler-room liver. We know this but still drink wine only fit for jewellery cleaning because it’s cheap. We dismiss numbness in our toes as results of Louboutins, not Liebfraumilch. We tell our children Coca Cola’s too expensive and bad for them while quietly air punching two for £10 wine offers. We drive not just because we can and because we are expected to – but also because we want to. We suspend our disbelief., cognitive dissonance, if you will. Our need to get Johnny to school or home safely from a night out coupled with a “who me?” attitude allows us to put drink drivers in a pond over there, leaving us to remain safe in the knowledge that we are not one of them. We are – and until we fess up, and face up more of us will continue to fall foul and, heaven forbid, continue to risk hurting ourselves and others. Again this is not to excuse - no drive by shouting please- but it’s out there and more and more women are entering a world they are so far never had a need to know about. If this raises an eyebrow then that’s enough for me.

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FOOD JUNKIES

The Truth About Food Addiction

Available at Chapters & Indigo Now!

By Vera Tarman with Philip Werdell Overeating, binge eating, obesity, anorexia, and bulimia: Food Junkies tackles the complex, poorly understood issue of food addiction from the perspectives of a medical researcher and dozens of survivors. What exactly is food addiction? Is it possible to draw a hard line between indulging cravings for â&#x20AC;&#x153;comfort foodâ&#x20AC;? and engaging in substance abuse? For people struggling with food addictions, recognizing their condition - to say nothing of gaining support and advice - remains a frustrating battle. Built around the experiences of people suffering and recovering from food addictions, Food Junkies offers practical information grounded in medical science, while putting a face to the problems of food addiction. It is meant to be a knowledgeable and friendly guide on the road to food serenity.

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By Terrence Daryl Shulman, JD,LMSW,ACSW,CAADC,CPC Founder and Director of The Shulman Center for Compulsive Theft, Spending & Hoarding Author of, “Cluttered Lives, Empty Souls: Compulsive Stealing, Spending & Hoarding” Image by Ed Yourdon

Honest Youth In a Dishonest World “Laws are like cobwebs, which may catch small flies, but let wasps and hornets break through.” Jonathan Swift

All of us take risks at some point in our life. Some risks are calculated, some impulsive. Some risks relate to basic life choices: getting into a relationship, going to college, applying for a job, buying a home. We take other risks for the feeling of thrill, excitement, or danger: driving fast, sky-diving, having an affair. Rule-breaking can be part of normal development— individuating and rebelling, testing the bounds of authority. But it can get out of control. We also learn about taking risks and breaking rules from those around us. We appear to live in a world of risks and rulebreaking. The recent financial meltdown was due to high-risks and loose—if any— rules. When the “innocent” pay for the “sins” of the guilty, is it any wonder there’s cynicism—not to mention, a whole lot of people walking away from their mortgages whether they had to or chose to.

Be honest, have you ever done any of the following?: 1. Shoplifted? 2. Stolen something, anything from work? 3. Lied to get out of a jam? 4. Cheated on a test? 5. Embellished your resume? 6. Been unfaithful in a relationship? 7. Fudged some figures on your taxes? 8. Broke or severely bent some rule to your advantage? 9. Found money or valuables and made no sincere effort to find its rightful owner? 10. Plagiarized someone else’s words as your own? If you answered “yes” to any one of these questions, don’t worry, you’re probably not alone. If you answered “yes” to most of these questions, you may do well to do a little soul-searching--especially if you are trying to raise honest kids.

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I’m not a parent myself but I have an 11-year old nephew whom I see regularly. My wife and I live in metro-Detroit and have been married over 10 years. Over the years, I’ve heard from from many adults that there seems to be a frightful decrease in ethics, civility, and respect for rules and the law in our culture--especially among the younger “me/entitlement” generation. One could argue, however, that the adults (for example, Congress and many CEOs and public figures) aren’t exactly presenting the best role models of integrity for today’s youth. Recently, we saw Arnold Schwarzenegger, Lance Armstrong, and Charlie Sheen stoop to new lows—not winning, but losing public respect and support. However, there does seem to be a worrisome trend. Cheating typically begins in middle school. Back in 1940, only 20 percent of college students admitted to cheating during their academic careers. Today, that number has increased to a range of 75%-98%. We’ve even heard of scandals involving teachers cheating on tests for their own benefit by marking up students’ scores.

• Over 10% (30 million) Americans shoplift and about 1/4 are under age 18.—2011, The Shulman Center estimate • 75% of employees steal from work and most do so repeatedly.—2010, U.S. Chamber of Commerce • Time theft (loafing) costs U.S. companies $500 Billion/ year in lost productivity. 2005, Denver Post • The average credit card debt per adult American is about $10,000.—2010, Time and Money magazines • 59% of American high school students say they cheated on a test in the past year; 21% say they stole from a relative; 80% say they lied to a parent; 92% say they’re satisfied with their ethics and character.—2011, Josephine Institute of Ethics • 9 out of 10 middle schoolers admit to copying someone else’s homework; two-thirds say they have cheated on exams; 75%-98% of college students surveyed each year admit to cheating at some time in their academic careers. --2011, NoCheating.org • 15% of Americans said they would be likely to cheat on their taxes.—2010, DBB Worldwide • 30% of employers have fired employees for misuse of e-mails or Internet on the job.—2007, American Management Association on Policy Institute The healthy being craves an occasional wildness, a jolt from normality, a sharpening of the edge of appetite… a brief excursion from his way of life.—Robert MacIver As an attorney and therapist, I’ve specialized in working with addicted clients, including many who are chronic risk takers and rule breakers, for over 20 years. In fact, for a 10-year period of my own life--from age 15-25-I intermittently shoplifted and stole money or product from various jobs. I was arrested and prosecuted for shoplifting twice--at age 21 and 24--before I got into therapy and began to explore and resolve many of the underlying issues that were fueling my bad “acting out” behavior. In part, I found out I had become “addicted to stealing”--to the rush and danger of it, to the relief I got from venting my pent-up anger and feelings of stress over having to become the “man of the house” at age 11 after my parents’ divorce. I felt like I was making life fair by getting something for nothing--it was a counterbalance to my suffering and sacrifice, my chronic overgiving. But I always felt conflicted--like I was living a double life. In essence, my stealing was a “cry for help.” But nobody seemed to be listening or attuned to me.

Consider the following statistics:

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While I learned to accept responsibility for my dishonesty, it didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out I was basically a good kid and my dishonest behavior evolved from emotional distress and some pretty poor role modeling from my father who was an alcoholic, had affairs, routinely didn’t pay child support, never apologized for anything, and bent just about every rule he could.

Parents, pay attention! Your kids are watching you... and they’re learning about honesty and dishonesty from you (as well as others). We need to ask ourselves the following questions: 1. How honest am I and how often do I follow or play by the rules? 2. Has my child witnessed my dishonesty and, if so, what have I said/done about this? 3. Do I hold double-standards for myself or other people or am I consistent? 4. Am I physically/emotionally attuned/available to my children or do I need to improve this? 5. Do I put too much pressure on my kid(s) to get good grades, achieve, never make mistakes? 6. When my kid(s) get in trouble or make a mistake or get a bad grade, how do I react? 7. Do I convey unconditional love for my child(ren) or do I convey love only when they behave?

confronted him but he finally told the truth. I asked her how she and her husband handled it. She said she yelled at her son--mostly out of fear that he’d develop a habit of stealing like she did--and that her husband gave him the whooping of his life. Then, she said, they prayed to God and asked their son to pray to God for forgiveness and marched their son over to the neighbor-friend’s to confess and pay him $5 for the rope. The cover-up is worse than the crime.—Anonymous

I asked my client her why do you think your son stole the rope? “He said he stole it because I never buy him anything and always say no when he asks--which isn’t true.” I asked her why he might feel this way then. She said that he’s probably just missing his Dad who’s been working overtime the last few months and, because she had been saying “no” more recently since she wasn’t just shoplifting things for her kids. She also stated that her son had a substantial amount of money in the bank from inheritance and allowances he had saved Here are some common reasons why kids (and adults) and that he didn’t like to touch it. We explored how he may break rules or take risks: may be developing an obsession around saving and not spending his own money. She also denied that he 1. Not proactively taught value of following rules/being knew anything about her history of shoplifting but was careful/being honest. open to my suggestion that it’s possible he knew even 2. Had too many rules/too many cautions against taking on an intuitive level that she was engaging in dishonest risks (rebelled). or secretive behavior and was acting out as a cry for 3. Witnessed rule breaking/risk taking by others (poor attention and reassurance. Then I asked her how she role-modeling). felt about yelling at her son and about her husband’s 4. Had own boundaries violated/was abused or betrayed. beating him. “Not good,” she stated plainly. 5. Was let down by authority/saw hypocrisy of authority. 6. Peer pressure--broke rules to fit in and/or taught I’m not a child-psychologist or expert on raising kids rules were made to be broken. but I believe when stealing or other dishonest behavior 7. Attention deficit/hyperactivity—easily distracted/ occurs–two strategies don’t tend to work well: “under restless. kill” and “over kill.” I submit that a child’s disruptive 8. Narcissistic tendencies--rules don’t apply to me. behavior is an invitation for a conversation with him 9. Had to raise self; therefore, little respect for authority. or her. Sweeping it under the rug or letting it slide 10. Experience excitement, power, satisfaction from sends the unspoken message that it’s not a big deal. risks/rule-breaking. On the other hand, if some discipline, punishment, or consequences are in order, it is important to teach why It’s not the dumb kids who cheat, it’s the kids with a 4.6 his or her behavior is inappropriate and not to shame the GPA who are under the pressure of keeping their grades child into feeling like he or she is an awful human being, up in order to get into the best colleges.--South Bay, CA afraid to ever face making a mistake or displeasing the teacher/parent parent again. Parents, we must also take a hard look at ourselves to admit if we have directly or indirectly I was counseling a client recently--a woman in her 30s, taught our children about dishonesty through negative mother of two young boys--who had been struggling example. with shoplifting addiction for about ten years. She shared how she felt horrified to discover her 8-year old We may also do well to explore and discuss with our son had stolen some rope from a local store owned by children why honesty is important--beyond what the law a neighbor-friend. He, apparently, lied when they first or the Bible says. Break it down for them. For instance,

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you may share stories from your own life along the theme that honesty promotes: trust, self-esteem, being given responsibilities, good relationships, serenity/peace of mind, others being honest with you, spiritual connectedness, and admiration and respect. Honesty is its own reward.--Anonymous While none of us can watch over our children 24/7 (though many try!) and guard or protect them from the negative influences of the world, we can do what we can do to work on ourselves and our own integrity and, hopefully, model and discuss it with our kids and, perhaps, others around us. It may seem that the world is a largely dishonest place, but we must remember not to give up hope. Also, it is common for the news to report nine stories of doom and gloom for every one story of heroism and positivity. While playing by the rules and being honest is not necessarily a guarantee that life will work out as we want it to, it does increase the odds overall that this will occur and decreases the odds of experiencing trouble, chaos, and humiliation. Besides, as they say: â&#x20AC;&#x153;thoughts lead to actions, actions lead to habits, and habits build character.â&#x20AC;?

Understanding Addiction, Food Addiction, Obesity and Eating Disorcers

THE POWER IS OURS The Addictions Unplugged website serves as a portal and discussion forum for medical professionals, front-line addiction workers and those affected by addiction to reach out to Dr. Tarman and find out the latest information on treatment.