The Snow Thrower's Lament

The Snow Thrower's Lament by rscholz@comcast.net

T

here's a big snow storm startin' up!

So I thought it would be good to see if my Snow Thrower (aka “Troy”) was still on speaking terms with me.

Rick: Hey “Big, Strong and Handsome” – ready to do the deed? The deed you were made for? The weather lady says, “Snowmageddon is here !”

Yes, the Big One's here and we're supposed to get 8 to 10 inches... Wow! It's show time! Time for some Big Time Vroom Vroom, Vroom...are you up for it big guy?

Snow Thrower: Not really feelin' it, Rick. Feelin' kinda mopey. Kinda like Eeyore in the Pooh stories. You might say I've got the blues, like Elton John don't ya know.

Ennui – would probably be the best word to describe how I feel. Ennui – it's a very good word you English speakers stole from the French and then dumbed down a bit... but it fits how I'm feeling right now, perfectly. Spiritually speaking, I believe I am experiencing what St. John of the Cross called “The Dark Night of the Soul.”

Rick: Ay Caramba! This – Is – Not – Good...! You're not FEELIN' it...!?! Since when do Snow Throwers have feelings?

Snow Thrower: I believe I can trace the “awakening” of my feelings to early last summer. Remember when you found those baby rabbits nesting under my snow throwing auger back in the shed where you park me for the Summer?

Rick: Yes, those baby rabbits were very cute – they must have been born and day or two before I first found them; they hadn't yet opened their eyes.

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Snow Thrower: Well, I guess spending two weeks next to those those cute little baby rabbits “stirred� my emotions into being. That was a special day for me. But having feelings is a bit of a mixed blessing, I must say.

Rick: Wow...! This is a new one for me. I've been taking care of machines all of my life and I love fixing them up and making them go. But I've never had to give one a pep talk to get them enthused about having to do what they were designed to do... to do what needs to be done.

Snow Thrower: Ah... now you are making me feel guilty too. Sad and guilty... I understand there's a lot of sadness and guilt among humans... I'm not liking it; not liking it one bit.

Rick: Well, it's too late for you to go back to being a mighty but dumb machine, I guess.

Snow Thrower: Yes... that horse is truly out of the barn, so to speak, and rewinding my personal evolution certainly does not feel like the right thing to do.

Rick: [Ever Resourceful] OK, let me check on the web and see if there's anything I can find to help us out of this sticky situation. That snow storm is startin' up and I don't think it gives a rat's ass as to how you, or I, or the birds or rabbits or whatever/whomever feels about it.

Snow Thrower: Thanks, I guess.

Rick Note: this snow thrower reminds me of Marvin the Robot in a Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy.

[Tick-Tock - A mere 15 minutes goes by and Rick is back in the garage talking to his forlorn/mischievous/weltschmerz-y/non-compliant snow thrower.]

Rick: Hey Hey, What do you say? Look what I found on the web today!

Snow Thrower: Lay it on me, big buddy. I'm down, but not out. I'm ready to grow-baby-grow!

Rick: I must say, l like your enthusiasm. I do believe there is hope for you yet. I found a Little Golden Book written specifically for Snow Throwers who are having a hard time understanding their feeling's. It's a perfect fit for you. Just like that spark plug I bought you last year when your get-up-and-go, got up and went.

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Snow Thrower: Groovy... but, I don't know how to “read.” Perhaps some day you could fit me with some headlights so I can gain a little perspective on the world and more importantly, learn to read. And, of course, it would make your life easier to see what's ahead of us as we plow forward, undaunted, where angels fear to tread on these dark and stormy nights. Many a mishap has befallen those who plow ahead blindly in life... am I right or am I right?

Rick: Sheesh.. now you're getting philosophical on me... a philosophical snow thrower...

That's what the world needs, for sure! Lordy, Lordy, Lordy. OK, OK, if we can soldier through this emotional impasse I'll go shopping for some headlights for you. First things first, let me give you the bird's eye view of Feelings From A to Z – Snow Thrower edition to see if we can help you out, and, dare I say it, fix you up.

This Little Golden Book explains various strategies for “little ones” to handle big emotions. Since you are a Troy-bilt Snow Thrower I think of you as “Troy.” Is it alright if I call you Troy?

Troy: Certainly!

Rick: Ok Troy... The Little Golden Book wants to know if you are feeling Mad or Sad? Troy: As I mentioned earlier, I believe what I am feeling is called “Ennui” - I feel bored with the world, existentially speaking. You might say... I feel a severe lack of “Joi de Vivre” (The Joy of Life) You know, kinda of like Satchmo when he crooned, “What did I do to be so black and so blue?” Except, of course, I'm red.

Rick: I have a feeling that this Little Golden Book about “Feelings” is a little too young for you. It wants to help you cope with the emotions of “mad” and “sad” which are pretty basic emotions. Emotionally speaking, how old do you think you are, Troy?

Troy: Probably 14 or 15 in human years. I feel things deeply but haven't developed any armor to protect myself from the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.

Rick: OK... I think I can provide a little guidance for you on your journey to emotional maturity. And then perhaps we can throw a some snow... whadda ya think? Are you with me?

Troy: Lead on good buddy... you've always been kind to me. Mechanics can be mean and treat machines like me as hapless, inanimate objects. You are not that way. You almost caress the wrenches as you twist my nuts. I'd say you're a “feel good” mechanic.

You've changed my oil and cleaned my carb and, generally speaking, care about my well-being. You've helped me live my life so far as a strong and effective Snow Thrower.

I trust you.

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Rick: Well, thanks for the kind words. Here's the deal when it comes to emotions, Troy. As children most of us learn to cope with our emotions and the anti-social things our emotions prompt us to do. Feeling “ennui” is not an emotion young children typically feel. Let's try a different approach. Let's assume your feelings are exactly correct. My guess is that your are feeling “ennui” because you spend more than half your life in a dark little tool shed with nothing to do. Do you think that might be what's going on with you?

Troy: Yes... it's a long hot Summer in that little shed, that's for sure.

Rick: OK... I'll open up the shed and let the sun shine in. No more day-after-day darkness for you. I'll add several windows so you can see the world. The new windows will let you see the sky and watch the weather and the sparrows and the robins and the garden rabbits and maybe even a deer with a fawn, now and then.

I must say, for a Snow Thrower you seem very advanced, spiritually speaking. It seems like you need something important to do while you are waiting for the snows of Winter.

Perhaps you could take on the task of creating the “The Gospel of Troy,” during those long Summer days.

Troy: Yes, I can imagine that in my future. You know what? I'm feeling better already!

Those dark clouds of emotional despair that have been bringing me down are starting to lift.

Rick: Wonderful! I greet you at the beginning of a great spiritual journey. As a side note, as you gain ascendance, spiritually speaking that is, some of your compatriots are bound to assume roles that almost seem predestined for them.

For example, you know that crusty green snow shovel hanging at the back of the shed? I definitely see him taking on the role of Judas Iscariot. Forewarned is forearmed, eh?

Troy: Oh Rick, let's burn that bridge when we get to it. I'd prefer to live in the here and now. And speaking of the here and now, whadda ya say we go out there and throw some snow... good buddy...I'm ready to go-man-go!

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I'm hearing Mick Jagger croon and strut in the Rolling Stones song, “Start Me Up” ...If you start me up If you start me up I'll never stop You can start me up You can start me up I'll never stop C'mon Rick, let's do the deed! All that snow just lyin' there so passive and smug, it's about to get thrown Sideways to Sunday... It's Prime Time! Push my primer button and I'll go Vroom, Vroom, Vroom, down the driveway...Yahoo!

Rick: Wow... you are something else Troy. My wife thinks I'm kinda wasting my time busting my knuckles working on the machines out here in my garage. Little does she know my “garage time” includes forays into a rich imaginative world of fantasy and philosophy and religion. I suspect she'd think I'm a little off-my-rocker if I told her about my conversations with a Snow Thrower.

Ah, well... such is Life.

Troy, good buddy... Let's Throw Some Snow!

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