Retaining Walls/
Pg 31,
Security & surveilance
Pg 73
Advertising
Pg 59,
TV / Satellite
Pg.38,71
Bar / Shop Supplies
Pg 8,,55
Water Softeners
Pg 5,
Printing / Graphic Design
Pg 66,69
Web Design & Hosting
Pg 65,
Fashion wholesaler
Pg 41
Workwear
Pg 61
Scuba Diving
Pg 63
Bouncy castles
Pg 61,
Watersports
Pg 57
Estate Agents
Pg,51
Holiday Apartments
Pg 51
Accountants / Finance / Legal Pg 47,61
Private Sales / Rentals
Pg 51
Insurance
Pg,3,10,23,37
Business centres
Pg 36
Dentists
Pg 24,25
Hair & Nails
Pg 24,
Hypnotherapists
Pg 40
Greeting Cards / Gift Shops
Pg 63
Home cook
Pg 18
Florist
Pg 6,
Air conditioning & Heating
Pg 30,39
Damp Treatment
Pg 43
Air Travel
Pg 12
Builders
Pg 38,59
Car &Van Hire
Pg 55
Furniture
Pg 14
Car Sales
Pg 76
Gardeners
Pg 31,68
Car transfer service
Pg 35,62
Garden Centres
Pg 31,
Mechanics
Pg 62,70
Glazing / Glass Curtains
Pg 9,13,
Removals
Pg 11,43,69
Kitchens
Pg 7
Bars, Restaurants & Clubs
Pg 15,16-21
Hi folks, IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENTS WE HAVE A NEW PHONE NUMBER 633 244 599 Hi , Welcome to the September Issue Thanks to all those who I met outside Iceland in the car last month, Also Thanks to the many distribution points for taking extra copies to get the copies out Namely Yorkshire Linen and Kwik save. If you didnt get a copy or have friends who missed out tell us the nearest place where we can leave extra copies we have some left. So it is over , the mad rush the difficulty in parking as the multitudes leave the coast to go back home we can look forward to a less stressful time? well maybe just the parking. I hope those of you who rely on the summer trade did OK , most have said it has been quieter than before but we all soldier on. We have a new article this month from Paul Eaton a financial advisor, his information is very good and hopefully he will continue writing for us on your finacial needs. The Inland Radio stations continue to bring us news and current affairs soo enjoy their
columns, The theatre season is ready to begin Fuengirola, also we are hoping to expand the coverage for local charities Cudeca and the Animal rescue centres. So send in your news and views Last months find Georgie winner was Del Smith via Email for 10 points, Mr Bell Beth from Alhaurin was Second. 8 points. Avril from celebrations in Fuengirola 6 points.
Kevin
Reasons to Advertise:
If you need tyres you did. If not you probably didn't give them a second glance. Not everyone is your 1. Customers Forget We the customer forget without constant customer every day. But each and every day there reminders. Each day a customer doesn't hear is a portion of the population that is looking for your about your company is one more day they start product. And you need to be there when they hearing about your competitor. are ready to start looking for that product
Recession Advertising:
2. Name Recognition When a customer thinks of a product whom do you want them to think of? It's pretty hard for them to Companies willing to raise their voices and immediately think of you if they don't see your continue advertising their wares in a depressed economy “will not only consolidate their existing name anywhere. position but will likely achieve a degree of dominance when the marketplace makes its 3. People often take their time when buying iI often use a laptop when I travel and the time is inevitable recovery”. coming for a new one. So I'll be shopping for that. Am I going out to buy it tomorrow? Probably not. I'll start watching the ads studying the available brands and assembling the features I need. I may not make the purchase for several months but when I do I will probably have a dealer in mind and they will get a shot at my business.
While consumers may stop buying during a recession, it doesn’t mean they stop listening. But if you keep your cool and maintain your advertising presence, when your competitors withdraw their voices from the marketplace your voice will be heard all the louder.
4. Customers move To advertise in The Sentinella Malaga, call Studies show that 25% of your customers will 633 244 599 move each year. or email info@thesentinellamalaga.com 5. A portion of the market is always shopping. You can keep your name out there for as little Did you notice the tyre ads in the paper today? as 10€ per month !!! Think about it...
Shot Man Finds Bullet In Head Five Years On A Polish man had a bullet lodged in the back of his head for five years because he was too drunk to realise he had been shot at a New Year party. The 35-year-old, who lives in Germany, was at a street party when he was hit by a .22-calibre bullet in the western town of Herne. The man told police he remembered taking a blow to the head "in 2004 or 2005" but did not get medical help and forgot about the incident because he had been "very drunk". The bullet did not penetrate his skull and police said he only went to see a doctor when he felt a lump in the back of his head. After an X-ray showed an object under his skin, doctors operated and found the projectile. Police believe the bullet may have been fired in celebration by a fellow party-goer. "It may have been a shot fired up in the air which entered his head on the way down," a police spokesman said. Biker 'Dies' 28 Times And Still Lives A man whose heart stopped 28 times after a road
accident has thanked doctors who saved his life Motorcyclist Steven Nixon suffered a massive heart attack when he was in collision with a car in Husbands Bosworth, Leicestershire, last year. Paramedics at the scene revived his heart five times before he was airlifted to University Hospital in Coventry, where a team of cardiologists saved him a further 23 times. The 44-year-old former warehouse manager also sustained a fractured skull, broken bones in his back, nerve damage and a broken right arm in the collision.But medics in Coventry were unable to treat his injuries without first stabilising his heart, so he immediately underwent a procedure which involved taking a series of photographs of his heart to pinpoint the problem. Cardiologists then fitted a pacemaker to stabilise the father-of-three's heartbeat and repair a torn artery, which had been causing his heart to fail. Dr Dawn Adamson, a consultant cardiologist who treated Mr Nixon, said: "Steven is unusual because his heart developed a life-threatening rhythm disturbance not compatible with life which meant the trauma team could not treat his other injuries.
"I wanted to take him to the cardiac catheter lab to see if there was something we could do with the heart to help him."It was only when he was in the catheter lab that we found the main artery in the heart was torn and his heart was receiving virtually no blood supply. "He is incredibly lucky to be alive and I am proud to be part of such an excellent team that meant we are all here today." Mr Nixon, from Allestree, Derbyshire, returned to the hospital recentlyy to thank the team who saved him, presenting doctors with flowers and chocolates. Speaking on the first anniversary of the crash, he said: "If it wasn't for the treatment that I received at University Hospital my family would not have a father or a husband. "I cannot thank them enough or fault the superb care that I received. They are a truly remarkable team of skilled, dedicated and compassionate people." Since the accident Mr Nixon has undergone three operations, including a heart bypass
Introduction My Name is Paul Eaton and I have been an IFA for the past 20 years and have recently joined The QROPS BUREAU. My role is to help Financial Advisers find the best Jurisdiction for their client and help with the compliance aspect of their work. Ensuring that you, the client receives the best advice at all times Over the coming months I will be explaining the different types of QROPS available and hopefully clarify some of the myths that surround Offshore Pension Planning and hopefully answer any questions that you have. In the past Spain moved from one miss selling scandal to another largely due to the unregulated and unqualified advisers, so I am going to start by helping you check to see who’s qualified/ regulated and who’s not. Do’s and don’ts of dealing with anybody offering Financial advice Always check that the Advisor is Qualified – You wouldn’t trust a plumber to take your teeth out, why risk your hard earned cash to someone who has
little or no understanding of the financial markets and products on offer. In Spain there are a number of companies selling QROPS with little knowledge of the products and no qualifications. It is essential that you use qualified advisor as bad advice could lead to a tax charge of up to 55% of any pension funds released If your adviser is only offering one type of QROPS, this should ring alarm bells as QROPS are not a one size fits all product. Check that the advisor is regulated and has Professional Indemnity Insurance; both of these can help protect you in the event poor or bad advice. All UK regulated individuals appear on the FSA Register and can be accessed via their website www.fsa.gov.uk . If the Advisors company is Regulated in Gibraltar you can access the companies regulated status via www.fsc.gi . Should you have any questions regarding Financial Advice, want to make contact with a fully regulated and qualified Financial Adviser in your area or if you are a financial adviser and would like to discuss the ways that the QROPS Bureau can benefit your clients. Please contact me on pauleaton@qropsbureau.com or call me on 95131533
The recent Foreign & Commonwealth Office report highlights the importance of obtaining appropriate travel insurance irrespective of your age. The report raises concerns about the frequency they are asked to assist people who are landed with extremely high treatment and repatriation bills, as a result of travellers either not bothering to take out travel insurance, have failed to declare a pre-existing medical condition when arranging travel insurance, or have wrongly assumed that if they are travelling within Europe, their EHIC would fully cover them for all medical and other associated costs Over the last 5 years, the cost of medical treatment has increased by over 270%.The most common illnesses requiring treatment are stomach upsets, ear infections, allergies and heart problems. Travellers are also involved in a high number of road traffic accidents as well as other injuries in unfamiliar countries.
With so many of the reported incidents being preventable, the FCO is appealing to people travelling or going to live abroad to make some simple preparations before you go. The FCO recommends contacting you GP as early as possible to find out if any vaccinations or medication are advised. Be very careful about what you eat and drink and be alert to the hygiene of the establishments where your food is being prepared. With road accidents continuing to be a significant cause of accidents and deaths, Brits are also reminded to wear protective clothing and helmets, even if the locals don’t, and to familiarise themselves with the local rules of the road. Check with your airline that you can carry any medication in your hand luggage and pack enough supplies for your whole trip and possible delays. Keep your medication in is original packaging and take any prescription documents with you. Check with the embassy that the medication will be legal in the country you are visiting. Some over the counter medicines are illegal in other countries, For example it’s illegal to take certain inhalers and allergy medications into Japan.
The FCO advice is to “Get comprehensive travel insurance�
Visit www.globelink.co.uk get a quote instantly and arrange cover securely online. Your travel insurance Policy and Emergency Assistance Card will be delivered to you immediately by email.
Roy Trevor Removals has, since its inception in Cheshire in 1918 always strived to give their clients value for money. Always using, only the highest quality professional packing materials and a quality work ethic, with staff that are trained to these exacting standards. Even in these uncertain economic times and when others are trying to reduce costs to keep margin levels the same, Roy Trevor has made it company policy that they will not succumb to the growing trend for cutting corners where quality is concerned with inferior materials It is this work ethic and attention to detail, combined with affordable and competitive removal costs that have kept Roy Trevor to the forefront within the industry for almost a century. The Spanish depot which has been here on the Costa del Sol since 1992, also maintains the same high standards. Client care is always the main priority, from first contact until final delivery, whether you are moving locally, storing your goods in Cheshire or Fuengirola, returning back to U.K or relocating across the globe. The Fuengirola depot is fully containerised, alarmed and has C.C.T.V. Storage is available in the dry, clean modern environment offering an excellent alternative to self storage. The office is open from Mon to Fri 9am to 7pm and callers are always welcome to view the premises, ask questions or just to view the testimonials which are always on display from previous and ongoing clients. A free, no obligation quotation is offered to all clients by their professional estimator to determine the exact cost of your removal inclusive of materials and I.V.A. A regular service between the U.K, France, Spain and Portugal is offered. Also they are experts at relocation to non EU countries and all relevant paperwork and customs clearance. As Roy Trevor is centrally located in Cheshire, this allows them to give competitive quotes, with regular distribution throughout the whole of Britain. Equally the central location of the depot in Fuengirola gives easy access to all areas of the Costa del Sol and a variety of vehicles ensures that all areas are accessible. Roy Trevor Removals accept all major credit cards Tel‌ 951 311 118 U.K.. 0843 207 4302 www.movingmatters.eu
Qatar is this months A- Z feature Population : 833,285 Total Area: 11,586 sq km Languages: Arabic, Currency: Qatari Riyal (QAR) Capital city: Doha National sport: Football, Handball Qatar is an oil-rich peninsula jutting out into the Gulf between Bahrain and the United Arab Emirates. The majority of the country consists of sand dunes and salt flats. The city of Doha combines a rich mixture of traditional Arabic and modern architecture. The Grand Mosque with its many domes and the Abu Bakir al-Siddiq Mosque are particularly interesting. The north contains most of the historic sites, including Umm Salal Mohammed, a relatively large village dominated by the ruins of a 19th-century fort. Al Khor is the second-largest city, situated around a natural shallow harbour. On the west coast there are fine beaches at Umm Bab ('The Palm Tree Beach') Dukhan and Salwah near the Saudi border. The
south is a region of sand dunes and beaches, offering opportunities to go pearl hunting, or to practise any of a number of watersports. Public entertainment can be rather limited. Live entertainment is infrequent, but some international artists do perform in Qatar. History little is known of Qatar's history until the 18th century. The Al-Thani family, forebears of the present rulers, arrived in Qatar then from what is now Sa'udi Arabia. Ruled by the Al Thani family since the mid-1800s, Qatar transformed itself from a poor British protectorate noted mainly for pearling into an independent state with significant oil and natural gas revenues. During the late 1980s and early 1990s, the Qatari economy was crippled by a continuous siphoning off of petroleum revenues by the amir, who had ruled the country since 1972. His son, the current Amir HAMAD bin Khalifa Al Thani, overthrew him in a bloodless coup in 1995. In 2001, Qatar resolved its longstanding border disputes with both Bahrain and Saudi Arabia. Oil and natural gas revenues enable Qatar to have one of the highest per capita incomes in the world.The country is one of the wealthiest in the world (due to oil reserves mainly) and boasts a great infrastructure, low crime rate, good weather in the spring and winter, and a great hospitable culture.
Sightseeing Overall, Qatar is a great place to visit, though it is generally not open to those on a limited budget. The main city is Doha, a small but highly contemporary city with great restaurants, hotels, and other amenities.There are several islands near Qatar that are interesting to take trips to for the day or camp overnight on. There are great small cities and towns all over the country that need to be explored. Desert camping and 4x4 is also very common and enjoyable.
Qatar National Museum, housed in Fariq al-Salata Palace. Although under renovation for several years, the site remains a fine example of traditional architecture. Doha Fort; built in the 19th century by the occupying Turks, it has been used as a prison and a stamp museum among other things.
Doha photography museum with retractable roof and a national library built on two giant pillars, aimed at crowning Qatar as Capital of Arab Culture Camel racing at Al-Shahaniya , near Doha, known as the 'sport of sheikhs', camel racing continues to be an important part of Qatar's heritage. Khor al-Adaid sunset tour Take an overnight tour andfind your own superlatives for sunset and sunrise over Qatar's inland sea; access to this area of salt-flats and sand dunes is by 4-wheel drive, and tour prices include barbeque and camping. Fishing towns of Al-Khor and Al-Zubara These were once important for the pearling industry, while Umm Salal Mohammed and Umm Salal Ali hint at a more ancient past. Bir Zekreet; the surrounding escarpment doesn't boast much in the way of altitude but it does offer an interesting lesson in wind-blown desert formations.
The Hong Kong Chinese restaurant is situated just off the the main A7 road on the right hand side if heading towards Marbella from Benalmadena in Jardin Botanico, La Cala De Mijas. Having had a long day distributing the magazine, Dan and I decided that a Chinese meal was what was needed. We hastily finished the deliveries to the establishments adjacent to the restaurant and sat down on one of the few available tables, a good sign that a restaurant is good is if its busy and it was. The owner Sophia was with us in a flash, despite being busy our ice cold beers were with us in moments. The menu had all the usual delicacies available. Its so hard to choose what to have as we munched on prawn crackers with a spicy dip, I opted for the chicken with black bean sauce, whilst Dan chose pork and mushrooms, we added Prawn toasts and special fried rice.
Because its all cooked fresh you have to be a bit patient. Sophia, despite being busy managed to pass some banter with us, as she did at every table, we watced her expertly serve the crispy duck with pancakes on the table next to us using the two forks method. Whist waiting we scanned the menu and noticed the takeaway service, (make a note of that). The lunchtime menu of the day for only 6.90â‚Ź also caught my attention, you get a starter, main course and dessert or hot drink .The warming trays arrived and then the food, we always share half and half when having chinese so we can try more things both choices were excellent and a generous portion too. Atter our meal we relaxed and took in the atmosphere which was one of contentment from all around, so we highly recommend, The Hong Kong restaurant in La Cala, we will back soon.
by Jan Morley
GOATS CHEESE Goat cheese, sometimes called chevre is a cheese product made from the milk of goats. It comes in a wide variety of forms, although the most common is a soft, easily spread cheese. It can also be made in hard aged varieties as well as semi firm cheeses like feta. It is most common in the Middle East, Africa, and some Mediterranean countries, where the hardy goat survives in areas where cows cannot. Goat cheese is distinctive due to the tangy flavor of goat milk. Sometimes this flavour is very strong and some consumers find it disagreeable. The strong flavour is caused by hormones, which will be reduced if milk producing nanny goats are kept away from male billies. In addition, like all animal products, goat milk is heavily influenced by what the goats are eating. Because goats have hardy digestive systems, they tend to eat many bitter plants that more delicate animals such as cows and horses will not. Goat milk is often used by those who are young, ill, or have a low tolerance to cows milk. It is much more similar to human milk than that of the cow, being much thinner, lower in fat, and higher in vitamin and potassium. . Because goat cheese is often made in areas where refrigeration is limited, aged goat cheeses are often heavily treated with salt to prevent decay. As a result, salt has become associated with the aroma of goat cheese, especially in the case of the heavily brined feta. Goat cheese has been made for thousands of years, and was probably one of the earliest made dairy products. In the most simple form, goat cheese is made by warming goat milk, mixing it with rennet to curdle, and then draining and pressing the curds. Soft goat cheeses are made in kitchens all over the world, with cooks hanging bundles of cheesecloth filled with curds up in the warm kitchen for several days to drain and cure. If the cheese is to be aged, it is often brined so that it will form a rind, and then stored in a cool cheese cave for several months to cure. Because goat milk is leaner than that of cows, goat cheese tends to be leaner as well. For this reason, many dieters craving cheese will use goat cheese as a substitute, crumbling it on salads or melting it on cooked dishes. Goat cheese softens when exposed to heat, although it does not melt in the same way that many cow cheeses do. Firmer goat cheeses with rinds are sometimes baked in the oven to form a gooey warm cheese which is ideal
for spreading on bread with roasted garlic. This is a simple recipe to marry goats cheese with chicken fillet and tarragon, it’s so simple to make, ideal for a quick family supper. FILLET OF CHICKEN, GOAT’S CHEESE AND TARRAGON, SERVES 4 4 skinless chicken fillets 1 x 150g soft goat’s cheese, e.g President 4 vine ripened tomatoes, sliced 2 tbsp olive oil Bunch fresh tarragon Pre- heat oven to 180 deg C, Make a slit down the middle of each chicken fillet, open into a pocket, gently using your finger Oil an oven proof dish, rub with oil, place the fillets in the dish, insert a slice of cheese in each chicken pocket, plus a little chopped tarragon, season with salt and black pepper Drizzle with a little more oil, bake in oven for 20 minutes, remove and top with sliced tomatoes, return to oven for 5 to 10 more minutes until cooked Serve with a little more chopped tarragon, dressed salad leaves and some rustic bread, great for mopping up the juices. Enjoy
Pregnant Miranda Kerr's Weekend Shopping with Orlando( Aug 28th)
Lilo is back Just look at Lindsay Lohan will you – she’s healthy, she’s clean and she’s got a big old smile on her face! Well actually it’s more like a trout pout come to think of it, but you get what we mean. The Mean Girls actress looked visibly perky when she was spotted arriving back at her LA home following her recent stint in a rehab facility. Speaking of which, now that she’s back on her feet it seems as though Lindsay is busy engineering her comeback. According to reports the actress has been turning down fees for club appearances and instead she’s turned to the people behind Britney’s comeback for advice. Apparently Lindsay has asked a team of experts, headed by hardcore Nashville businesswoman Lou Taylor, the help revamp her career. LiLo wants Lou to look after her finances and she hopes Britney's manager Larry Rudolph will breathe life into her dead music career. A source close to the troubled star said: "It is unbelievable. Lindsay is like a whole new woman. Just months ago she was trawling the clubs until the early hours and keeping the wrong company. Now all she can think about is work, work, work." Well we supposed that makes a welcome break from her thinking: prescription drugs, prescription drugs, prescription drugs…. John James Shows Off His “Natural” Six Pack As He Recreates Becks’ Armani Ad… Blimey, it proves ther is life after Big Brother, John James’ The Aussie reality star showed off his drawn on toned abs as he recreated Becks’ famous Armani ad for a recent edition of Star magazine .In his interview with the publication Becks, soz we meant John James (it’s such a good match we can hardly tell the diff) also opens up about his feelings for Josie and talks about their “special bond”. Anyone actually reckon they’ll stay together once she’s left the house?
Tending to the household needs, Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr were sideby-side while out in Malibu, California The recently married and expecting couple dropped by HOWS Market near Zuma Beach as they picked up a few items before hitting the exit. Trying to avoid being photographed together, the pair quickly separated - as Miranda drove away in the family car while Orlando rode off on his Ducati motorcycle. Having confirmed the joyous baby news in the September issue of Spanish Vogue magazine Kerr proudly dished that she's currently four months along. Bringing an end to a long day of promoting Katy Perry offered up a late night performance at Splash Bar in New York City on Friday (August 27). Showing off her voluptuous figure in a cute bandage dress with colorful stripes, the 25year-old entertained the packed nightspot with tunes from her justreleased album Teenage Dream. Aside from focusing on her new musical offerings, Katy has also been busily planning her wedding with fiance Russell Brand - altogether making for an overwhelming workload, Miss Perry recently told People magazine, "Most people have breakdowns just over weddings, and I'm planning mine and my tour. I really have to learn to breathe and delegate." Also dishing on her wedding attire plans - which won't be over the top - she tells, "I'm definitely not going to get married in latex. When I wear latex onstage, I sweat. I could wring out those dresses and I don't want to do that at my wedding." .. why not it should turn Russel on. See you next month
Lyndsety Davenport you can email me on Thesentinellamalaga.com
Historical & Botanical Gardens New Atrium opening in September. We made a welcome return to the beautiful botanical gardens just on the outskirts of malaga and were privileged to get a sneak preview of the exotic plants inside the new atrium’s controlled environment. We have all seen the nature programmes on TV showing the carniverous plants, now you can get up close and personal to them. These insectivores are beautiful and are hand fed. Yes I did say it, hand fed by the attendant, with wasps and flies. In side you will find exotic pitcher plants, fly traps and some beautiful orchids. So bring your camera. International Tourist Day occurs on September 26th, to celebrate this The gardens and museum are open Free of charge and you get a free coffee with the voucher on the main advert so its a very cheap day out. Take one one of the guided tours (even for wheelchairs) or just amble around in the peaceful settings in the shade of some of the many different trees, take in the multitude of flora and fauna, sit by one of the pools or waterfalls, you will forget where you are for a moment. Visit the coffee shop for a meal or drink then view the many souvenirs in the gift shop. The gardens are open all year except Christmas day and New years day and Tuesday afternoons are free of charge
Honouring those who improve the species.... by accidently removing themselves from it! or almost!
Parrot Hunter 1999 At-Risk Survivor Confirmed True by Darwin (10 April 1999, Florida) Damion, 18, wanted a unique gift for his girlfriend, who worked as a babysitter for a neighbor's children. The neighbour thought that a Quaker parrot would be a perfect present. The beautiful green birds with gray bellies grow a foot long, counting their tails, and are worth over $100. That was expensive, but the neighbour figured they could get a baby parrot for free... if they caught it. Nothing stirs man's blood like the thrill of the hunt, Armed with a long metal pole, Damion set out with the neighbour and his 15-year-old son to reconnoiter the nesting spot of the elusive Quaker parrot. The intrepid trio may have overlooked the fact that they were trespassing on private property, and that the property was owned by Florida Power. But it is unlikely that they failed to notice that the nests in question were inside a 6-foot fence topped with three rows of barbed wire, surrounding an electric substation. This 230,000-volt transformer was peppered with signs saying, "Danger High Voltage," and "No Trespassing." The hunters overcame those obstacles and entered the parrot sanctuary where about 60 colorful birds fluttered around their large, multi-story stick nests. Fortunately one of the nests was situated on a transformer low enough to interest a hunter with a seven-foot metal pole. Damion poked at the nest hoping to dislodge a hatchling, and 15,000 volts of electricity found their way down the pole, through his body, and into the ground. Damion suffered second- and third-degree burns over 50 percent of his body. The neighbor suffered minor burns between his ankles and knees. His son was not injured. "That's just a little hobby they have," said the neighbour's wife. "They like to go looking for those little baby Quaker parrots. I'm not saying (they were) right, but this was an accident." And all this came from an innocent question about a birthday present at a Saturday hamburger cookout!
blow to the head, they will never suffer a concussion or brain damage.
More Things You Learn by Watching Movies
It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts — your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
It is not necessary to say "Hello" or "Goodbye" when beginning or ending phone conversations.
No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion, volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.
Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.
Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off. It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
When a person is knocked unconscious by a
When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other. Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds — unless it's the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside. Television news bulletins usually contain a story that affects you personally at that precise moment
Jaime Sanmartín, President of INTRAS, received the award from the Minister of the Interior, Alfredo Pérez-Rubalcaba.
EL PAÍS, RNE AND ANTENA 3 TV, WINNERS OF THE SEVENTH EDITION OF LÍNEA DIRECTA’S ROAD SAFETY JOURNALISM AWARDS Línea Directa Aseguradora, market leader in the direct sale of car, motorbike and home insurance has announced the winners of the VII Road Safety Journalism Awards, in a ceremony presided over by the Minister of the Interior, Alfredo Pérez-Rubalcaba, and attended by a number of celebrities from the world of politics, finance and communication. The Minister of the Interior highlighted that “The work carried out by media professionals and organisations like those which have received an award from Línea Directa is essential, and therefore receives the Department of the Interior’s full support and gratitude. Figures in recent years show a clear improvement in the number of road accidents in Spain, but we cannot forget that there is still a great deal to do and that it is vital to keep fighting to reduce the number of deaths from traffic accidents as far as possible.” María Dolores Dancausa. CEO of Línea Directa and Alfredo Pérez-Rubalcaba, the Spanish Minister of the Interior Elsa Granda from El País, the programme team from “En días como hoy” (“On days like today”) on RNE (Spanish National Radio) and Javier Gallego from Antena 3 Television News, were the winners in this seventh edition in the categories of Written Press, Radio and Television, respectively, each receiving a prize of 9000 euros. The jury focused on the innovative nature of the topics, the variety of sources, how the information was presented and the documentation used by the winners. .Honorary and Solidarity Awards Línea Directa Aseguradora is a socially responsible company strongly committed to reducing the number of traffic accidents in Spain. Since it was founded, it has developed new channels of research and analysis which have encouraged drivers to adopt safe driving habits in our country. As a result, once again it wishes to recognise the work of those entities, social foundations or individuals who have shown a strong commitment to road safety. Therefore, Línea Directa’s Road Safety Solidarity Award went to the Instituto de Tráfico y Seguridad Vial (Traffic and Road Safety Institute) (INTRAS), in recognition of the groundbreaking projects developed by this organization in our country to raise social awareness and carry out scientific research into road safety.
In addition, Línea Directa’s Honorary Road Safety Award went to the Federación Española de Bebidas Espirituosas (Spanish Federation of Alcoholic Beverages) (FEBE) for promoting the concepts of the designated driver and responsible behaviour when behind the wheel. Jaime GilRobles, President of FEBE, received the award from Pilar González de Frutos, President of UNESPA, (Spanish Association of Insurers and Reinsurers).
In her speech, María Dolores Dancausa, CEO of Línea Directa Aseguradora, pointed out that “Línea Directa’s Road Safety Journalism Awards are only one step in the long journey that we still have to make. But if, year after year, by getting people to talk about road safety we only manage to avoid, at some time – somewhere – a single death – just one – all our commitment and hard work to make these awards a benchmark in the fight against deaths on the road, will have been worthwhile. That is why, in Línea Directa, seven years on, we still believe that road safety – speaking about everybody’s safety - , deserves an award.” More participants than ever before Every year Línea Directa Aseguradora gives Road Safety Journalism Awards to those journalists who, in their daily work, help to make people aware of safe driving habits, encouraging all of us to gain a deeper and better knowledge of road safety related topics. In this seventh edition, there were 28% more participants than in the previous one, with a total of 491 projects, which outlines how both our country’s journalists and the public in general are becoming more and more interested in road safety. To find out more about Línea Directa and its comprehensive and very competitive motor insurance policies, call 902 123 104.
as standard with the option of medical screening for clients with more serious conditions. Since then Staysure has become synonymous with low cost, value for money over 50s insurance solutions across the board.
Staysure brings over 50s experts to Spain Staysure has been providing low cost insurance solutions to the UK’s over 50s for over six years from their HQ in Northampton, and this year opened their first European branch, located in Marbella, southern Spain. Despite the current economic climate, Staysure decided to expand into Europe in response to high demand amongst the large European, in particular the expat community in Spain, for good value, UK standard cover, with documents provided in a language they can understand. Although based in Spain Staysure is authorised and regulated by the Financial Services Authority and our multi-lingual team of experts are all UK ex-pats with first-hand knowledge of living in Spain. When the company was launched in 2004, they concentrated on providing low cost travel insurance and were one of the few providers to include cover for pre-existing medical conditions
Today, Staysure offers clients not only a selection of insurance products including private health, home, holiday home, car and of course travel, they also offer a choice of underwriters, each selected for relevance to the over 50s clientele, at the best possible prices. The most recent addition is a selection of pre-paid funeral plans specifically designed for expat clients. As from May 2010, these products are now available to expats throughout Europe. Staysure has succeeded in providing expats with a one-stop-shop for all insurance needs, which can be bought in branch, by telephone or simply pop into the branch. What could be easier – if you want insurance ask the experts! Tel: 952 899 527
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Sky Diving in aid of Cudeca Hospice International photographer based in Marbella, Gary Edwards, will perform a Sky Dive on 18th September 2010 in aid of Cudeca Cancer Care Hospice. Together with Babak Alimoradian, director of the adrenalin sport company, Team Extreme.es, Gary has collected a group of 20 individuals to make the jump, all of whom will be supporting various different charities including Cudeca. Gary has promoted the jump on his online magazine marbellas.com, and welcomes anyone to join the team as there are a couple of spaces still available. The Sky Divers will travel from Marbella the day before spending a night in the city of Sevilla, with the jump the following morning. They will be tandem jumps with professional Sky Divers. The fall is from 15,000 ft. with a free fall of 60 seconds!! Cudeca wishes Gary and all those supporting Cudeca the best of luck! For more details or a space contact Babak Alimoradian at e-mail: balimoradian@gmail.com John Hill Memorial Classic Car Run The Classic Car Club of Andalucia will be holding
an event in memory of John Hill, a much lovedmember of the Club. The event, in aid of Cudeca Cancer Care Hospice, will take place on Saturday 11th September and is open to the public, especially to those who own a classic car. All participants are asked to pay a 10â‚Ź entrance fee and the start venue is to be confirmed. The idea is to get some of your friends or associates to sponsor your car to partake in the run, this in order to raise many funds for Cudeca. Just like sponsoring a conventional run or walk, or a swim etc, almost anyone will give 10 Euros considering that most people have either known someone or been associated with someone lost to cancer. If each car could find 10 sponsors then we will be really making a great contribution to such an important cause. The run will finish at the restaurant El Campanario Golf and Country Club in Benamara, just past San Pedro, who will provide a parking and display area just for the cars. Banners and decorations will be in evidence at the hotel in support of Cudeca. There will also be collecting tins nearby which will be used to collect funds from the general public, and a raffle on the day with numerous prizes kindly donated by local friends and businesses. An excellent lunch is available for 30â‚Ź inclusive of wines etc. For more information or if you would like to donate or collect some prizes for the raffle, please contact Ian Giles on 620 180 682.
Inland News from 106.8 Ace FM TAPAS has found itself a new home at Restaurante Los Arcos on the outskirts of Coin/Alhaurin el Grande. Rehearsals are already under way for their forthcoming Old Time Music Hall in October. The well respected TAPAS choir, which is currently on its summer break, will also be based there and will resume weekly rehearsals on Tuesday September 7th at 8pm. Hopefully this new location will encourage those from the surrounding area, who feel they may enjoy singing as part of a choir, to try this friendly and easy going group (reading music is not a requirement). All are welcome. For further information on the choir and future productions visit the TAPAS website at www.tapassociety.com The 2010 Inland Charity Dog Show will be held at the beautiful La Finca restaurant and stables in Alhaurin el Grande on Saturday 16th October in association with CHAIN and ARCH. With show and obedience classes and events especially for children this is the dog show not to be missed. Stallholders are welcome and all proceeds go to the two charities, helping abandoned and mistreated animals in Andalucia. For more information, visit www.chaininspain.com or email Wendy at chaininspain@hotmail.com Finally, 106.8 Ace FM celebrates its third birthday this month. There will be a variety of competitions on air during September featuring great prizes as a free weeks car hire from Country Car Hire, food and drink from UK Food Supplies, a complimentary car service from Apex Autos and even a free therapy session from local hypnotherapist The Dreamweaver ! We will be celebrating next month with a Grande Fiesta in Alhaurin el Grande so make sure to pick up a copy of next months Sentinella Malaga to find out more or visit our Facebook page : www.facebook.com/acefm Have a great September, Dave @ 106.8 Ace FM Radio for Inland Andalucia
The Lowly Earth worm is this months amazing animal Anatomy The basic body plan of an earthworm is a tube, the digestive system, within a tube, the muscular slimy, moist outer body. The body is annular, formed of segments. Earthworms have a simple open circulatory system. They have two main blood vessels that extend through the length of their body: a ventral blood vessel which leads the blood to the posterior end, and a dorsal blood vessel which leads to the anterior end. Most earthworms are decomposers feeding on un-decayed leaf and other plant matter. Earthworms are hermaphrodites: They still however have to pair up for reproduction. The young emerge as small, but fully formed earthworms, They attain full size in about one year, sometimes sooner. Scientists predict that the average lifespan under field conditions is 4–8 years, still most garden varieties live only one to two years. Several common earthworm species are mostly parthenogenetic, that is, with asexual reproduction resulting in clones Regeneration Earthworms have the ability to regenerate lost segments, but this ability varies between species and depends on the extent of the damage. it is theoretically possible to grow two whole worms from a bisected specimen in certain species Earthworms are sometimes found on the surface of the ground following heavy rain storms, as a storm may flood the soil with excessive water. While the earthworm has need of a moist environment across their skin both for comfort and respiration, if the soil in a storm becomes saturated, an earthworm may have trouble breathing and begins to drown. To save themselves they will escape higher soil layers, or to the ground surface. However, if the surface where they find themselves is unexpectedly paved, rocky, or compacted (hardened), they may become stranded and die from causes such as injury, heat, exposure, dehydration, or predation. Where this occurs, they may be frequently found stranded, damaged or dead in places like sidewalks or driveways shortly after a storm Earthworms travel underground by the means of waves of muscular contractions which alternately shorten and lengthen the body. The shortened part is anchored to the surrounding soil by tiny claw-like bristles (setae) set along its segmented length. The whole burrowing process is aided by the secretion of lubricating mucus. Worms can make gurgling noises underground when disturbed as a result of the worm moving through its lubricated tunnels.
They also work as biological "pistons" forcing air through the tunnels as they move. Thus earthworm activity aerates and mixes the soil, and is constructive to mineralization and nutrient uptake by vegetation. Certain species of earthworm come to the surface and graze on the higher concentrations of organic matter present there, mixing it with the mineral soil. Because a high level of organic matter mixing is associated with soil fertility, an abundance of earthworms is beneficial to the gardener. In fact as long ago as 1881 Charles Darwin wrote: It may be doubted whether there are many other animals which have played so important a part in the history of the world, as have these lowly o r g a n i z e d creatures In many soils, earthworms play a major role in converting large pieces of organic matter (e.g. dead leaves) into rich humus, and thus improving soil fertility. This is achieved by the worm's actions of pulling down below any organic matter deposited on the dried dirt, such as leaf fall or manure, either for food or when it needs to plug its burrow. Once in the burrow, the worm will shred the leaf and partially digest it, then mingle it with the earth by saturating it with intestinal secretions. Worm casts can contain 40% more humus than the top 9" of soil in which the worm is living. Chemical. As well as dead organic matter, the earthworm also ingests any other soil particles that are small enough—including stones up to 1.25mm across—into its gizzard wherein minute fragments of grit grind everything into a fine paste which is then digested in the intestine. When the worm excretes this in the form of casts which are
deposited on the surface or deeper in the soil, minerals and plant nutrients are made available in an accessible form. Investigations show that fresh earthworm casts are 5 times richer in available nitrogen, 7 times richer in available phosphates and 11 times richer in available potash than the surrounding upper 150mm of soil. In conditions where there is plenty of available humus, the weight of casts produced may be greater than 4.5kg per worm per year, in itself an indicator of why it pays the gardener or farmer to keep worm populations high.
Capricorn 22nd December – 20th January Seven of Cups, You've been doing a lot of daydreaming about just how you would most like your emotional or relationship life to be. You, Capricorn, of all the signs, understand very well the necessity to actually take concrete steps to build the relational world you would like. Take action to distance yourself from people who serially cause you distress or unhappiness. Make efforts to be sure to arrange to spend more time with those who seem to lift your spirits. Remember to factor fun into your life. Aquarius 21st January – 18th February Six of Cups, You're doing quite a bit of sentimental journeying through warm memories of family and childhood. A sacrifice made in recent times has separated you somewhat from the people and places you're remembering fondly. You hope that the tyranny of distance won't mean less contact with those you love. Although you are very contented with current circumstances, it seems that making definite arrangements for family gatherings would work well for you. Pisces 19th February. – 20th March Six of Wands, You've worked hard, Pisces, in order to gain understanding from a person close to you. You've planted the seeds for victory in this matter and victory will be yours in September. There will be some form of approach to authority figures in order to formalize this new understanding. This will be a reason to celebrate and that's exactly what you'll soon be doing. . Aries 21ST March – 20th April. Six of Cups, Family issues loom large for Aries in September and unfortunately all is not harmonious. There have been intra-family quarrels recently and you could well find that the only solution that is functional for you is to remove yourself from the sphere of influence of the trouble. This will mean a significant and abrupt change in your life circumstances, leaving you feeling rather isolated. Remember, isolation is better than continuing within a hostile situation that is effectively a no-win situation. . Taurus 21st April – 21st May Queen of Pentacles, Material security and beauty mean a great deal to the emotional wellbeing of the great Bull, and that's what September holds for you where your relationship life is concerned. You will have to take firm steps, however, to ward off interference from someone who would try to upset that enjoyable harmony. You also have hopes concerning far foreign places, or someone who is abroad, and those hopes will soon come to be realised. Gemini 22nd May – June 21st Nine of Cups September Gemini! That's when a wish of your heart comes true. Great creativity blossoms in the home life. New opportunities are offered and, through your own creativity, you will enjoy significant positive life changes where relationship is concerned. What you've assessed yourself as needing by way of relationship will come into being.
Cancer 22nd June – 22nd July Death, You've been somewhat disenchanted with a particular relationship of late Cancer. Well, there is an abrupt change about to come where that relationship is concerned. That relationship is over come September, and although there will be many reasons for you to be relieved about this, there is always a certain sorrow in retrospect where hopes or wishes come to naught. Greater wisdom results in the wake of these events, as well as the freeing up of finances from the demands of the person in question. Leo 23rd July – 23rd August Five of Pentacles, Leo, you've been going through a tough spell where a relationship is concerned. Take heart, you're coming through to the other end of the difficulties and very much with the help of a faithful friend or partner. Yes, the issues, which have erupted with the relationship that is giving you trouble, will bring about the end of that relationship. But the difficulties ensuing will soon be overcome -- and much more easily than you'd imagined. You'll find yourself feeling harmonious contentment sooner than you think.
Virgo 24th August – 22nd September The World, The world speaks of attainment according to your individual destiny and desires Virgo. You will find the freedom to move ahead where emotional or relational issues are concerned, as circumstances that might have held you bound in the past are released. You will become much more aware where a relationship is concerned, acquiring the necessary skills where harmonious boundary setting is needed. This card can also portend the meeting of a soul-mate, or special friend, or future spouse. Positive growth and change is in the air for you. Libra 23rd September – 22rd October The Hanged Man You are going to have to sacrifice something in the month of September, Libra, in order to attain greater balance and harmony in your romantic or relationship life. This will involve coming to a sorrowful conclusion, which makes it clear that there is no way out of accepting that sacrifice. When you weigh up your options you'll realise that what you have been pursuing cannot come to the hoped-for conclusion. Seek professional advice if money is involved. The final outcome will prove to be of surprising relief to you. New freedom. Scorpio 23rd October - 22nd November Knight of Wands, Quarrels in a relationship will be best handled by firm but gentle insistence that open communication must be undertaken in a calm and mutually respectful manner. If you have trouble maintaining such communication and angers flair, seek professional assistance. You will come through to tranquil and harmonious relating again, but it's going to take work. Sagittarius 23rd November - 22nd December The Devil, Trouble crosses your path Sag. where a relationship is concerned. Issues around money and material assets will not be the least of your problems. A relationship entered into, or maintained, because of a fear of being alone can cause you to compromise your integrity for the sake of the companionship or other needs. You have the strength to let go of that which has become mired in negatives, even if it means some material losses. Rather than hoping for a new relationship of equivalent type, hope for finding a way to be comfortable without such a relationship if fear is part of the choice.
New music Hmm lots of good music out and on the way - a new Phil Collins Motown covers album recorded with some of the original Detroit Musicians - The Funk Brothers. Symphonicity is the new album from Sting with Orchestral versions of some of the best of his tracks. August proved to be the festival month of the year both on the coast and here inland. The first being the Abba Concert at Marbella Bullring featuring the brilliant Bjorn Again and Ruth Lorenzo. The audience were blown away with Ruth who has developed tremendously from her X factor day´s singing classic rock songs such as Paradise City and Purple Rain and a truly moving acapella version of a Spanish song. From the moment Bjorn Again took to the Stage we were treated to a very professional performance of all the Abba Classics The second big concert was the Rockin Marbella X Factor show with Alexandra Burke, Jamie Archer, Diversity and the Scarletz. Diversity opened the main part of the evening with a sample of the show that they will take on tour later this year proving once again that they were worthy winners of Britain’s Got Talent. Next Alexandra Burke who was brought on early as she had a flight to catch back to the UK. She performed all her hits with choreographed dance routines which high-lighted her dedication and hard work. The Scarletz came on next and had a few problems with the sound on stage and microphones considering this, and the fact they were the only act with live musicians, they gave a good strong performance. The final act of the evening was Jamie Archer who gave a superb show singing lots of well known new and classic Rock tracks. I was lucky enough to get an interview with Jamie who told me he´s working with his new band writing and looking forward to recording a new album Then inland we go for the Heart and Soul, Ska and Reggae Festival. We have to say congratulations to the organisers Tamsin, Steve, Karen and our own Pete Carter well done chaps. Excellent bands including SkaDictator and Looney Toons, tremendous DJ´s with thanks to Steve K, Dilinger and Fiesta Girl. Thanks to all the stall holders and a special thanks to Flavours of Jamaica serving the best Curried Goat I´ve had in years. We must say a huge thank you to everyone who helped raise approximately 1400euros (still counting) for Have a Heart Charity who help people within the Inland area. We must say a huge thank you to everyone who helped raise approximately 1400euros (still counting) for Have a Heart Charity who help people within the Inland area.
The long awaited return of Robbie Williams to Take That is heralded by an excellent new single called Shame from Robbie and Gary Barlow A couple of new Acts to watch out for has to be Victoria Beebee and the BB band brand new music with an easy Jazz flavour and singer songwriter Justin Grant What do we have to look forward to ........ Locally we have the Coin Multicultural day involving countries from around the world all of whom now have now live here - a great day of music, market stalls and food is promised Also happening at the end of September is the World Rally Events Road Runner Rally 2010 feature the most incredible collection of cars with Ferrari to Fiat 500 and Bentley to Mini. The event is designed to be a Charity Fun Race from Marbella to Barcelona and back to the Ascari race circuit near Rhonda a true petrol heads event Keep listening to Heart fm 95.7 for more details The Heart and Soul of the Campo - Lee
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1. Which battle was fought in 1815? 2. Which musical instrument does Sherlock Holmes play? 3. What animal is the emblem of the Democratic Party in the United States? 4. What is the state capital of Arizona? 5. What was the first name of the composer Grieg? 6. In which year did the National Lottery begin in Britain? 7. In the Russian space station MiR what does mir mean? 8. What is a sampan? 9. In which country is Farsi the official language? 10. Who was the last emperor of Germany? 11. Which book of the Bible has only one chapter? 12. What is the gemstone for November? 13. What sort of creature is a goby? 14. What is hypnophobia the fear of? 15. Who was the second Pope? 16. In what year was the Bay of Pigs Invasion? 17. What is Charles Babbage said to have invented? 18. What element has the symbol Na? 19. Who wrote Mansfield Park? 20. How many pockets has a billiards table?
Answers on page 74
Stereo grams Turn the page sideways clockwise and look at the image you should see an 8 legged friend? Can’t see it, heres some tips that might help The Pullback Get very close to the stereogram, and very, very slowly pull it away from you. At first you won't even be able to focus on the image... However, keep moving the image in and out, relaxing, and it will appear. Look at the Reflection You'll need to LOOK at something about twice the distance of the image. It turns out we have something that is almost always available that is the exact distance... your reflection. By looking at your reflection, this will help, if not put the book one side of a glass door enough to let you see your reflection.then... After looking at your eye, simply stop focusing on your eye, and try to see the image. Repeat, switching your focus from your eye to the image, and your reflection... and suddenly you will get it.
Answers on page 74
Across 1. Ambassador (8) 5. Make mention (6) 9. Force (8) 10. Not after (6) 12. A bird like the whippoorwill (9) 13. Movable fence barriers (5) 14.Look at Flirtatiously (4) 16. Illustrations (7) 19. Shield from harm (7) 21. Between the head and shoulders (4) 24. Sea (5) 25. Pay back (9) 27. Interior (6) 28. Small talk (8) 29. A short trip to do a task (6) 30. Genial (8)
Down 1. Rely (6) 2. Promise solemnly (6) 3. Beginning (5) 4. Land (7) 6. Not lethargic (9) 7. Taking in an orphan (8) 8. Something of sentimental value (8) 11. Gull-like bird (4) 15. Rookie (9) 17. Antonym (8) 18. Bullfighter (8) 20. Territory (4) 21. _______ - nor (7) 22. Lady-slipper (6) 23. Guard (6) 26. Wash oneself (5)
Answers on page 74
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z Discover how to break a code: Every number in the codeword grid is 'code' for a letter of the alphabet. Thus the number '12' may correspond to the letter 'L', for instance. We have given you 3 letters, 3 = K, 6 = B & 25 = V Answers on page 74
Using the letter grid below, how many words can you find. - Each word must contain the letter in the middle (E in this example, so ACT is not allowed) - words must contain 3 or more letters (so AT is not allowed) - each letter can only be used as many times as it appears in the grid - no proper nouns , -There is as always a 9 letter conundrum. ( EVERYONES FAVOURITE) If you score more than 15 words well done
Corporate shake up If you've ever worked for a boss who reacts before getting the facts and thinking things through, you will love this! Arcelor-Mittal Steel, feeling it was time for a shake-up, hired a new CEO.The new boss was determined to rid the company of all slackers.On a tour of the facilities, the CEO noticed a guy leaning against a wall.The room was full of workers and he wanted to let them know that he meantbusiness. He asked the guy, "How much money do you make a week?"A little surprised, the young man looked at him and said, "I make $400 aweek. Why?"The CEO said, "Wait right here." He walked back to his office, came back in two minutes, and handed the guy $1,600 in cash and said, "Here's four weeks'pay. Now GET OUT and don't come back."Feeling pretty good about himself, the CEO looked around the room and asked,"Does anyone want to tell me what that goof-ball did here?"From across the room a voice said, "Pizza delivery guy from Domino's."
How to call the police when you are old George Phillips , an elderly man, from Meridian, Mississippi, was going up to bed, when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the light, but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things. He phoned the police, who asked "Is someone in your house?" He said "No," but some people are breaking into my garden shed and stealing from me." Then the police dispatcher said "All patrols are busy. You should lock your doors and an officer will be along when one is available." George said, "Okay." He hung up the phone and counted to 30. Then he phoned the police again.. "Hello, I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people stealing things from my shed.. Well, you don't have to worry about them now because I just shot and killed them both; the dogs are eating them right now." And he hung up.
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Within five minutes, six Police Cars, a SWAT Team, a Helicopter, two Fire Trucks, a Paramedic, and an Ambulance showed up at the Phillips' residence, and caught the burglars red-handed. One of the Policemen said to George, "I thought you said that you'd shot them!" George said, "I thought you said there was nobody available!"... Don't mess with old people. Medical check up at supermarket One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Bob says to Mike behind him, 'My elbow hurts like the dickens!! I guess I'd better see a doctor.''Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money,' Mike replies.'There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart . Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it.It takes ten seconds and costs $10 - A lot cheaper than a doctor.'So, Bob deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart.He deposits $10, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. 10 seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:'You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and Epsom salts found on aisle 2. Avoid heavy activity. It will improve in 2 weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart.'That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Bob began wondering if the computer could be fooled.
He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure.Bob hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits $10, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.The computer prints the following: 1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9) 2. Your dog has ringworm.. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7) 3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab. 4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.. 5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better! Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart Hi this is Georgie, he is the Sentinellamalaga’s mascot. A Yorkshire Terrier who loves to run around and hide from us his owners. We are always trying to find him, he hides in the magazine every month. If you spot him please email us and tell us where he is. At the end of the year the person who spots him most and fastest will earn a reward. Email thesentinellamalaga@gmail.com
TRAIN A1 Andalus Express Coastal Service RENFE Ticket Info
952 537 227 952 360 202 902 240 202
BUS EMERGENCY NUMBERS Emergency Ambulance Fire Brigade Local Police National Police Guardia Civil Helpline in English Red Cross Ambulance
112 061 080 092 091 062 902 102 112 952 444 499
HOSPITALS Carlos Haya Hospital Civil Hospital Maternity Hospital Costa del Sol Hospital Hospital Clinico Univ
951 030 100 951 030 300 951 030 200 952 102 112 952 649 400
HEALTH CENTRES Alhaurin de la Torre Alhaurin el Grande Alora Benalmadena Cartama Central Health Service Coin Fuengirola (Los Boliches) Fuengirola (West) Health 24hr Response Mijas (La Cala) Mijas (Las Lagunas) Torremolinos
952 410 426 952 595 000 952 498 100 952 440 305 952 424 042 955 018 000 952 453 336 952 460 036 952 468 835 902 505 060 952 492 150 951 062 247 952 386 484
CONSULATES British Irish U.S.A. The Netherlands
952 352 300 952 475 108 952 474 891 952 380 888
MALAGA AIRPORT Information 952 048 771/952 048 484 Arrivals T2 952 048 844 Arrivals T1 952 048 845 Departures 952 048 804 Gibraltar Airport 956 773 026
Alhaurin el Grande Benalmadena Fuengirola Malaga Torremolinos
952 490 709 952 443 563 952 475 066 952 350 061 952 380 965
TAXI Alhaurin de la Torre Alhaurin el Grande Benalmadena Coin Fuengirola Malaga Torremolinos
952 410 444 952 491 010 952 441 545 952 453 587 952 471 000 952 327 950 952 380 600
TOWN HALLS Alora Benalmadena Campillos Coin Fuengirola Malaga Mijas Torremolinos
952 496 100 952 579 800 952 722 168 952 453 018 952 589 300 952 135 000 952 485 900 952 379 400
MARKETS DAYS Tuesday - Antequera, Fuengirola. Wednesday - Alhaurin de la Torre, Arroyo de la Miel, Rincon de la Victoria, Saydo Hotel Mollina, La Cala de Mijas. Thursday - Alhaurin el Grande at the Feria, Pizarra, Torremolinos at Recinto Ferial Ground. Friday - Arroyo de la Miel, Cartama Country Farmers Market, Cartama Feria Ground, Mijas Costa, Rincon de la Victoria. Saturday - Coin, Fuengirola, La Cala de Mijas, Ojen, Caratracca Car Boot. Sunday - Benagalbon, Coin La Trocha, Estacion de Cartama, Fuengirola, Malaga next to the Stadium, Pizarra Car Boot, Torremolinos by Crocodile Park.
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A-Boards, Boats & Jet Skis Tlf: 65 1111 88 5 Fuengirola Port
elitevinylsigns.com VAN HIRE Man with Van & Trailer. â‚Ź 20 p/h No job too small, Local & International. Call Dave 665 034 005 or 695 888 870
VETERINARY SURGEONS BRITISH VETERINARY SURGEON Home visits at no extra cost. First and second opinion work, vaccines, Id chip, blood analysis etc. Consultations in the comfort of your own home. Tel: 652 302 985 Mr Wayne Hockenhull BVMS MRCVS
1) Waterloo
11) Obadiah
2) Violin
12) Topaz
3) Donkey
13) Fish
4) Phoenix
14) Sleep
5) Edvard
15) Linus
6) 1994
16) 1961
7) Peace
17) The computer
8) Boat
18) Sodium
9) Iran
19) Jane Austen
10) Wilhelm
20) 6
Codeword: 1=Y, 2=X, 3=K, 4=L, 5=T, 6=B, 7=U, 8=I,
9=A, 10=Q, 11=Z, 12=E, 13=J, 14=N, 15=O, 16=D, 17=W,
18=S, 19=M, 20=G, 21=C, 22=F, 23=P, 24=H, 25=V, 26=R,