BLUSH Magazine- Spring/Summer 2020

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FREE | SUMMER 2020

Madeline Stuart freedom to be me NEW YORK

NEW YOU!

Benefits of affirmations

ASK! Nikkita Patel Liberate Your

LOVE LIFE

BUTT

exercises

Carolina Moura’s

beauty Scars


Ultimune Shiseido’s #1 Serum Fight the effects of stress, city life and signs of ageing for smoother, more radiant and resilient skin.

1EVERY SOLD 9

SECONDS***

151 BEAUTY

AWARDS

25 YEARS OF RESEARCH

Discover Ultimune at Shiseido counters at Harrods, selected John Lewis, Debenhams, House of Fraser’s and online at Look Fantastic, Cult Beauty, ASOS and Shiseido.co.uk.


***Source : B-NASS: sell-in data for ULTIMUNE serum and eye serum. Worldwide Sell in, Shipped bottles through January - December 2018 (Calculated by 24 hours a day)



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BLUSH

CONTENTS Summer

GET THE LOOK:

77

Ultimate Travel 52

64

Beauty 8 11

Look Good Feel Better NEWS ASK! Nikkita Patel

13 Bum’s the Word 14 “I’mperfect …” BEAUTY PROJECT 23 Busy Mum Life? Easy Hairstyle!

53 New York New You

Style

53

57 Perfect Travel Companion 60 Spring Loaded FASHION 64 Prints. Patterns. Polka-dots. 66 The Badu Do 68 Fly Free... FASHION

Leisure & Lifestyle

Health & Fitness

28 Sally’s Story

74 Liberate your Love Life

34 Try it! You may like it! 36 ‘It Works’ ESIMBI social enterprise

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7 Things to Try in Dubai

26 Get the Look: Into the Wild

30 Free to be Me: Madeline Stuart

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77 Butt... do I have to!? 79 Good Gut

42 Furniture Village FEATURE

80 Trigger Warning: Mental Health Topic TRUE STORY

48 Freedom to Fly TRUE STORY

86 New Self Belief

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BLUSH | W E L C O M E Dear liberated lovely readers... Welcome to the first 2020 issue of BLUSH – Reminding us that we can be free no matter our life situation, that we can start anew at any point of our individual journeys, and we can liberate our lives by just making the choices that are right for us!

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I’d like to extend a special ‘thankyou’ to the contributors that have been involved in this issue: Enjoy the stories, articles and inspirational images – Including information on Look Good Feel Better charity; ASK! with BBC’s Glow Up semifinalist Nikkita Patel; an interview with Down Syndrome supermodel Madeline Stuart; and a beauty story with cover model Carolina Moura.

Jordan

Managing Editor

COVER CREDITS Photographer & Styling: Dawn Marie Jones: @stoyanovjones Hair & Makeup: by Monnie Kaur: @monnie.k.makeupartist Using cruelty free products: Skincare by Embrylisse and Make-up by Illamasqua Model: Carolina @zone_models | @caromoura_

Disclaimer: BLUSH Magazine is published bi-annually (twice per annum) by Seven Star Media Ltd. No part of BLUSH Magazine may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted to any form without permission. Views expressed in the magazine are not necessarily those of Seven Star Media Ltd, and are included to provide advice only. No content is a substitute for professional medical advice. During printing, images may be subject to a 15% variation. © Copyright of content belongs to individual contributors with the magazine copyright belonging to Seven Star Media Ltd. All rights reserved. Please either keep this magazine for future reference, pass it on for somebody else to read, or recycle it.

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Executive Editor Lee Gatland Art Director Richard Hejsak Managing Editor & Brand Consultant Jordan Martin Jordan@sevenstarmedia.co.uk Proofreader Ara E Lee Ara@sevenstarmedia.co.uk SALES TEAM sales@sevenstarmedia.co.uk 01959 574 556 Printed By Micropress Printers Ltd Published By SEVEN STAR MEDIA LTD, 184 Main Road, Biggin Hill, Westerham, Kent sevenstarmedia.co.uk Tel. 01959 543659

CREDITS

With love, support and possibilities

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BLUSH | B E A U T Y

IT’S ALL IN THE NAME ‘LOOK GOOD FEEL BETTER’ UK CHARITY continues to offer cancer support in 2020.

N

ational cancer support charity, Look Good Feel Better, has been supporting people undergoing treatment for cancer since launching in the UK in 1994. During that time, the charity has supported more than 185,000 people, helping them combat the impact on appearance that can be experienced during cancer treatment. Confidence and self-esteem can also be rocked during these testing times and that is where the charity plays another vital role.

eyebrows and eyelashes. Regular workshops are held in 140 hospitals and cancer centres across the UK, not only providing a safe environment for shared experiences, but also giving the attendants the chance to connect with other people in a similar situation. The workshops have been known to have a transformational impact on levels of confidence and self-esteem. A recent survey makes for encouraging reading when 2,661 people took part in Look Good Feel Better’s 2019 UK Patient Survey.

Results showed that: Look Good Feel Better provides a unique service across the UK, offering workshops and advice for women, men and young adults undergoing treatment for any type of cancer. Each group session is led by trained volunteers and provides a chance to meet others in a similar situation, as well as teaching the attendants useful skills and techniques to help manage the side-effects of cancer treatment, such as skin changes or loss of

When asked to rate their satisfaction level as it relates to what they learned in the workshop, 97.6% claimed to be satisfied. 97.8% said that the programme had been valuable in improving their self-image.

93.8% felt confident about their appearance after attending the workshop. 96.8% felt supported by their group. 95.4% agreed that their appearance made them feel more confident. 99.2% would recommend the Look Good Feel Better workshop to others.

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As one beneficiary commented: “Look Good Feel Better is not just about make-up, it’s not about vanity – it’s about control and giving you the strength to fight this horrible disease.” Another added: “The workshop has made such a difference, to me and my family. I was living in self-imposed isolation and now I have regained my life.” Sarahjane Robertson, the Chief Executive at Look Good Feel Better, was pleased with the findings:

“People undergoing cancer treatment who attend our workshops receive practical advice on dealing with the physical changes that cancer treatment can have. The support they encounter during the session will also have an important impact on their sense of well-being. The survey findings show that our workshops do make a significant difference to how people feel about themselves, helping them regain a feeling of confidence and self-esteem.” “Our workshops, which provide a safe environment for shared experiences, can have both a lasting and transformational effect at an incredibly tough time in someone’s life.” One of the ladies who recently attended a workshop, summed it up perfectly:

“I just wanted to pass on my thanks for the session I attended earlier this month. I am currently halfway through chemotherapy

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for breast cancer and attending your course has really made a difference to the way I look and feel. The course was so well run and the volunteers were wonderful with us all, but it was also a really helpful opportunity for me to talk to other women going through similar things to myself. I have kept in touch with the girl sitting next to me because neither of us had yet met anyone locally in their 30s with young children going through cancer, so we found we had a lot in common and exchanged numbers to meet up soon. Since attending the course, I have been putting aside an extra ten minutes after my shower each morning to put on some of the lovely makeup products I received on the course and although I only have time to use some of it because I have two children aged three and one who keep me very busy in the mornings, I feel so much better about myself. Everybody has been saying how well I look, to

which I am telling them all about Look Good Feel Better. People are saying they would have no idea I was having chemotherapy, so it is amazing what a decent wig and some makeup can do for your appearance and confidence! I am also taking proper care of my skin by doing a proper skincare routine every night, which I never made time for before. So, I just wanted to say a big ‘thank-you!’” Buy a gift from our shop - From a T-Shirt to a set of make-up brushes, a compact mirror to a stunning fabric bracelet designed to retain your favourite fragrance; anything you buy will help those that need it most. For more information about the charity, the services it provides or how you can help, please visit: lgfb.co.uk or call 01372 747500. While the current uncertainty regarding Coronavirus means that face to face workshops are on hold, we now offer virtual workshops, please see www.lookgoodfeelbetter.co.uk/ support-advice/virtual-workshops/

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I CREATE D C-L ASH FOR PEOPLE JUST LIKE ME. I FOUND THAT SUC H A LIT TLE C HANGE, GE T TING MY L ASHES BAC K, MA DE ME FEEL LIKE I HA D MYSELF BAC K.

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THERE ARE THREE ST YLE S TO C HO O SE FR OM:

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BLUSH | B E A U T Y

What is the main difference between applying make-up for Instagram compared with everyday looks?

Q2:

This depends from person to person – there are many make-up artists out there and we all have different styles. My make-up style is ‘wearable’, which basically means it does work for social media, but the idea is that people can wear the looks in their daily lives; at work, for events, parties and so on. And I love working with neutral colours and experimenting with different bases. I like my Instagram videos and content to be attainable looks, that are achievable for the average person. The aim is to reach out and to inspire. I find being more relatable and showing your natural self and skin helps your audience connect with you as an individual. They get to see you for a real person and not just a ‘perfectly polished’ being online.

ASK! BBC series Glow-up saw the beautiful (inside and out) Nikkita Patel reach the semi-finals of the competition – the young make-up artist demonstrated her creative skills, her sweet nature, her attention to detail and her ability to work under immense pressure when she was called up again... (and again) to beat fellow contestants in the bottom two for elimination. We asked Nikki three beauty questions about confidence, Instagram and business ... here are her pearls of wisdom:

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Q1:

How can makeup liberate a person?

Make-up has the power to change everything. I have learnt to know not to let it be the only way that I feel confident or good about myself, but it can truly liberate someone and help them gain confidence. I personally have always been insecure about the dark circles under my eyes – and I think this could be the root of why I am so obsessive about base make-up and perfecting my base to make sure these dark areas are completely concealed – but I honestly feel like a different person once I have my ‘face’ on - I exude confidence. It is about bringing the best out of someone, not about wearing a mask. Make-up is also therapeutic – applying my make-up is the only time of the day when I stop thinking – Which I enjoy because I am able to just go with the motions of the brushes and then get on with my day feeling good.

What advice would you offer to somebody wanted to start a new beauty business?

Q3:

Consistency is key. Be prepared to amend ideas and adapt to certain situations as the beauty business is constantly changing and developing. I would say that people can feel and see the passion someone has for their beauty business – so be passionate. Try to cover as many social media avenues as you can as this will be a free way to advertise your beauty business, and don’t be afraid to take on board constructive criticism. Go for it! Change can only start now! instagram.com/nikkissecretx youtube.com/N1kk1sSecr3t

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Sell Sell Cellulite

Beauty brands must have loved it when the word ‘cellulite’ was invented to name the lumpier parts of the human body... it meant opportunities for anti-cellulite products. This appearance of skin is natural; however, it can also be avoided and there are ways in which you can reduce the appearance of cellulite. Detox with water, green tea, blueberries and other fresh fruit and veg. Animal products tend to create more of a cellulite appearance. Exfoliate once a week with a gentle scrub; this will increase circulation in your bottom and thighs, The Body Shop have a great range. Exercise such as yoga, cycling and walking can increase circulation and tone these problem areas too. Remember, that a dimple in your cheeks, is really rather cute. Brazilian beauty brand Sol de Janeiro’s Bum Bum Cream is enriched with a special blend of cupuaçu butter, acai, coconut oil and guaraná caffeine that is said to help stimulate circulation, keeping skin smooth and feeling tighter. With Instagram going crazy with booty photos, it is clearly a thing of the modern day... but filters and apps aside... how do our bottoms really measure up? And does Stretching the it really matter truth in the bigger Puberty; pregnancy; Virgin coconut oil can be picture if it is a purchased from most chemists, exercises like pea-bottom or a health stores, and supermarkets. weightlifting; bubble butt? Of weight loss – and course not! What matters gain! – are all causes of stretch is that our butts look their best – so we can feel our best in our jeans, swimwear, marks. News flash: Stretch marks lingerie, active wear and even in our baggy are absolutely normal. Breasts, track-pants. thighs, hips and bottoms are main £18 for 75mls travel size available at Selfrdges & Co

BUM’S

the word

The warmer seasons are upon us and the bottom line is simple... we need to get our bums out of hibernation and prepare for short-shorts and swimwear... and to basically give our bots a little – no, a lot of love...

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Pimple-free zone

As our bottoms spend a lot of time cooped up under our clothes, they can be prone to pimples... This can be avoided: Close your pores, increase circulation, and firm skin with a blast of ice-cold water at the end of your daily shower. Pat your skin dry and moisturise with oil or a light lotion. Aim to shower immediately after workouts freeing your skin of those tight sweaty clothes. Avoid junk food too, and stay hydrated. Try Kiehl’s lightweight body lotion that is rich but doesn’t leave an oily or thick residue.

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areas where the tissue stretches beneath the skin’s surface. Truth is, those little beauty marks cannot completely disappear, but you can reduce the appearance somewhat and prevent further stretching of the skin by using products that are very moisturising, including virgin coconut oil, or camellia oil.

Try to fit some ‘butt’ exercise in your busy schedule:
Don’t stand on the escalator, walk your way up to a firmer bum. Do bottom clenches whilst queuing, washing up and watching TV. Do try to walk instead of taking public transport or driving. And to give your booty a real boost, check out the top five exercises on page 77.

£28 for 250mls available at kiehls.co.uk

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i’m perfect be 14

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“i’mperfect...” BEAUTY

M

PROJECT

ake-up allows us to conceal our scars physically and metaphorically – some makeup allows for a complete cover-up, and for models like Carolina Moura it would be easy to edit out her deep scar that was left from an accident when she was an eight-yearold child. “I fell and I came straight [in]to the door.”

But why erase something that adds to her beauty? At school she fell victim to bullying and later faced prejudice in her professional life as a model. “I was working as a model, and in my school they all call[ed] me a liar, because they thought it was impossible to be on TV or be a model with a scar on the middle of my face.” The modelling industry often demands unrealistic ideals and ‘perfection’, which can be damaging – both to the models themselves and to society as a whole. Models often appear to have the perfect lifestyle, but at times, they can in fact be some of the most insecure of people; being constantly judged on appearance alone. As a photographer I have seen this many times. Carolina is a successful Brazilian model, but she has faced challenges within the industry and in her personal life, which have had an impact on her inner confidence.

She fell victim to bullying and later faced prejudice in her professional life as a model. Carolina was told that she could never be a model and has experienced cruel discrimination on set, which left her deeply upset. Her first modelling job in Mexico was exciting, but she quickly became disappointed because she was cut from the commercial due to her scar being too obvious on video. She decided soon after to cover her scar with a fringe. Despite this, she has continued with her passion and is an incredibly beautiful, warm and positive person. Her scar is a part of her uniqueness and her story. Although she was nervous about baring her full face for this beauty shoot (and the intimate video, which can be viewed on: vimeo. com/372912392) we were able to make her feel confident and beautiful enough to work with us on this project. She’s since told me that she would like to grow out her fringe! Project i’mperfect is a demonstration of beauty, without retouched scars and unrealistic ‘perfection’; just the whole person being allowed to feel perfectly comfortable within their own skin, scars included.

auty project sevenstarmedia.co.uk

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o extreme BLUSH | B E A U T Y

GO EXTREME ON THE EYES WITH HIGH SHEEN SHADOWS AND CONTRAST WITH RETRO NUDE LIPS IN A MATTE FINISH.

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Soft tones CHOOSE PEARLISED SHADOW IN SOFT TONES PAIRED WITH A DARKER SHADE OF LIP COLOUR.

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Gold plated stud earrings: Faux Fresh ASOS Edition Tall asymmetrical one sleeve plisse: Faux Fresh ASOS Edition

Right: Sculptural four stone earrings in gold: & Other Stories

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2020 TRENDS EXTEND WET LOOK HAIR TO A WHOLE NEW LEVEL: USE GEL PRODUCTS OR NATURAL OILS TO ACHIEVE THIS. FINISH YOUR LOOK WITH STATEMENT EARRINGS! sevenstarmedia.co.uk

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MATCH YOUR STATEMENT EARRINGS WITH METALLIC OR FOIL EFFECT EYELIDS: LASHES LICKED WITH BLACK MASCARA, AND BROWS BRUSHED UP WITH GEL. KEEP LIPS MATTE AND DARK IN CONTRAST.

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Using cruelty free products: Skincare by Embrylisse and Makeup by Illamasqua | Model Carolina: @zone_models | @caromoura_

Photography & Styling Dawn Marie Jones: @stoyanovjones | Hair & Makeup by Monnie Kaur: @monnie.k.makeupartist

Foil effec

BLUSH | B E A U T Y


GABOR STYLE 43.492.23 HARDEN | TEL: 01642 677222 E-MAIL: CUSTOMERSERVICES@INTERSHOE.CO.UK


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BUSY MUM LIFE?

Easy Hairstyle!

Do you leave hairstyling to the bottom

Well, help is at hand in the form of multi-awarding hairstylist and salon owner Vicki Lord... Mother of two, Vicki describes herself as a “Hairy Godmother...” So, we asked her for some advice on how we can look like we’ve made an effort with our hair without actually, well, making an effort with our hair.

of your list of things to do?

L

ook I’m a busy business mum, and it is not always easy to keep my hair looking like I have just stepped out of a salon... And I am pretty certain I am not alone in this... but I bring good news because Vicki gave me an easy look to share with all

mums out there that can be achieved super quickly each morning before the school run or ready for a trip out grocery shopping... And Vicki reassured me that “—even you’ll be able to do it my darling!” So, I am certain anyone can in that case!

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Soft bridle brush, hair band, grips,

Products: Dry shampoo; I recommend Batiste Hairspray; I recommend Elnett L’oreal

Step 1: Section a triangle of hair from your temple area and take it back about two to three inches towards the crown area. Isolate this hair away from the back section of hair. Secure the rest of the hair into a ponytail at the back of head towards your crown area.

Step 2: Gently back-brush the triangle section at the front to create the quiff, and use dry shampoo at the root area to help create height and texture whilst still back-brushing. Smooth the top layer of quiff tail using the back-brush. Step 3: Dress the quiff back towards the base of

with a A retro twist make prett y bow onWaldock up artist Kelli

the ponytail creating as much height as you’d like and then secure with grips.

Step 4: Now with the ponytail done, take a small section of the ponytail from underneath and wrap around to disguise grips and band. First - Secure with grips underneath the base of ponytail. Then - Spray with hairspray to secure in place.

Here is a How-to of Vicki’s Pony with a Quiff for Busy Mums: This is the easiest most effective do for busy mums, and it is a practical hairstyle that can be done so quickly and has instant impact! I have done this style on brides, on regular clients and on celebrities including Eastender’s Shona McGarty and model Jodie Kidd.

Equipment needed:

This is the easiest most effective do for busy mums ading Jodie Kidd he t with out to an even ny tail this exact po

For an extra special day-look, try curling the ponytail. Or if your hair is not quite long enough try adding a clip-in pony tail... Balmain have a great range! vickilordhair.com

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S t o C a r eÂŽ

Taking the sting out of medical adhesive removal

A fresh approach to gentle & effective medical adhesive removal & protection

StoCare produces a range of high quality, easy-to-use products to protect & care for the delicate skin around a stoma.

Effective Gentle Easy to Use Cost Effective UK manufactured

StoCareÂŽ is a Trade Mark of Rhodes Pharma Ltd. Unit A, Newlands House, 60 Chain House Lane, Whitestake, Preston , PR4 4LG, UK T: + 44 1772 647 440 F: + 44 1772 647 449 www.stocare.co.uk


Aura Clothing is a new brand that focuses on creating custom garments for those living with an ostomy. The garments are created and developed through the passions and personal experiences of its founder who has had an ileostomy since the age of 13. Her passions for unique design and helping others brought the vision, and these products to life. Our products bring together the finest materials, purposeful design and glamour to meet the needs of ostomates who want products that are both unique and beautiful. We believe in quality, care, and creating products that you can enjoy. Colourful, creative, and inspired by contemporary design and materials.

We are motivated by the women and men who struggle to wear everyday clothing due to their ostomy, tubes, scars, hernias, stretch marks or even those who are uncomfortable with their abdominal region. Our aim is to create and produce high quality garments with functional detail that not only see you through the coming seasons but items that will be worn for years to come.

A word from the founder My name is Angelina and I am the founder and creative director of Aura Clothing. I was diagnosed with Crohn’s Disease at the age of 12 after months of being unwell and by the age of 13 I had my ileostomy. For me, my ostomy is simply a challenge to overcome. It is difficult to live with the stigma that is put on people like myself, nevertheless I will continue to overcome the stereotypes and turn something negative into positive.

Email us at Info@aura.clothing or visit our website www.aura.clothing


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Into the

Photographer:Â kerryannduffy.com | Hair Stylist: vickilordhair.com | Make-up Artist: helenleemakeup.co.uk | Model:Â @meggielodge

WILD

Release your inner Tribal Goddess with this beauty and hair look.

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How-to Hair by Vicki Lord: This works best with medium to long hair, so you may need to clip-in extensions if your hair is short. I recommend Foxy Locks.

1 2 3 4 5 6

Curl hair first to create movement. Use dry shampoo at the roots. I recommend Perk Up (amika - a vegan brand which I love and use in my salon). Back brush top part of hair to create volume but keep the sides quite flat.

Dress the top section backwards into a quiff style and pin to secure in place.

Next tightly dress the sides back and round to sit under the quiff at the back of the head; secure in place with grips. Use amika Blockade serum to smooth sides. Take a small section of hair from the back, apply volume powder (Vandal from amika) to the piece of hair and then braid into a fish tail braid. The powder will give the hair more grip, allowing you to braid easier. Pull out sections of the braid slightly after it is tied and secured, to create a more textured modern look.

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Finish style with amika Fluxes Touchable hairspray to set in place.

Accessory Options: For this shoot we used some twisted rope doubled over and tied under the fishtail for one look, and added a thin braid at one side – this is easy to do, simply take a small section of hair from beneath the sleek side and create a simple plait. We also used some sparkly pieces from Glitzy Secret, and a statement headdress that I made – which looks great with the hair loose at the back, or even if you wish to create two chunk messy braids with the wavy loose hair. So many options for you to let loose and go wild with! Make-up Tips from Helen: This look is all about a light-to-medium flawless coverage, glossy lips and intense eyes. Keep the eyebrows strong to frame the features and apply feathery lashes that are still full but natural. The intense pigment of shadow needs to suit skin tone, and be applied beneath the eye too. Ensure the black liner goes inside the inner eye on this look and only use a little bit of darker colour to cut into the crease of the eye. Finish the look with a jewelled bindi at the centre of the eyebrows.

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Sally’s Story BLUSH | L E I S U R E & L I F E S T Y L E

“It was July 2017 and we were in the midst of my youngest son’s year six celebrations before we headed off for a couple of weeks on a family holiday. So, it was nearly a month before I finally went to my GP about that lump I had found whilst in the shower,” says Sally Martin, a mother of four boys. Here is her story ...

I was quickly referred to a breast clinic and was diagnosed with aggressive grade three breast cancer, which had also travelled to my lymph nodes. It was like a nightmare: I was taken to the dreaded side room and offered tea as I tried to take in the consultant’s fateful words.” This is the terrible conversation that no one wants to have, but that many of us may have to face. Cancer does not discriminate: it can affect any one of us, at any point of our lives, whatever our background and wherever we are from. According to Cancer Research UK, someone in the UK is diagnosed with cancer every two minutes. For Sally, the effects of the cancer treatment, which immediately followed, were harsh. She gained weight, lost her hair, eyebrows and eyelashes, while her skin became sore and her nails brittle. She was constantly exhausted, and felt that she had been stripped of her femininity. Sally could barely recognise herself. “I was handed leaflets with scary titles, such as ‘how to deal with hair loss’, ‘what is chemotherapy?’, and ‘how to tell your children you have cancer’ – which all seemed to make the reality even more frightening,” continues Sally. “Amongst all of these, one leaflet stood out because it didn’t look as intimidating – it was called “Look Good Feel Better” produced by a charity of the same name.”

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With some trepidation, Sally booked herself onto one of the charity’s workshops, unsure as to what to expect. When she arrived, the room was filled with other people looking shy and vulnerable, all at different stages of cancer treatment. Some in wigs, some with no hair, but all with the one awful thing in common. Cancer. Sally remembers, “I needn’t have worried. Laid out in front of each of us were bags bursting with an array of amazing cosmetics, creams and lotions. It was all so welcome, especially at a time when I felt that everything had been taken away from me. “We picked up our mirrors, confronted our reflections, and then over the next couple of hours, learned new techniques from our caring and knowledgeable volunteers. How to look after our skin after the cancer treatment had taken its toll, how to apply make-up to bring out the best in each of us, which creams work best on skin affected by chemotherapy and other really practical advice.” The once anxious group visibly relaxed and soon the room was filled with laughter, conversation and camaraderie. Stories were exchanged, friendships were forged and amongst all this, people were given the space to just be, and to start to feel good about themselves again. As Sally confirms, “Look Good Feel Better gave me the tools to cope with the

people were given the space to just be

many changes brought about by cancer treatment. It’s more than just cosmetics, it really made me feel better and everyone around me responded in a more positive way. To see the sparkle return to the eyes of those beautiful women who had forgotten themselves amongst the trauma, was a moment I will never forget and in that moment at least, cancer was forgotten.” For Sally, the outcome has been positive and she is now in remission. Feeling fabulous again, she now urges anyone going through the same experience to get in touch with the charity. For more information about the charity, the services it provides or how you can help, please visit: lgfb.co.uk or call 01372 747500. While the current uncertainty regarding Coronavirus means that face to face workshops are on hold, we now offer virtual workshops, please see www. lookgoodfeelbetter.co.uk/ support-advice/virtual-workshops/

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SOFT ON SKIN, GENTLE ON DELICATE FABRICS Gently cleans and cares for your wool & delicates Renews softness and volume Prevents shrinkage, stretching and shape loss to delicate fibres

www.fairylaundryaids.com Star Brands Ltd, Dunlop Road, Redditch, B97 5XP. Certain trademarks used under license from The Procter & Gamble company or its affiliates.


Free Free to be me BLUSH | L E I S U R E & L I F E S T Y L E

Madeline Stuart is a worldwide phenomenon. She is a powerful advocate for inclusivity and diversity in modelling... and she is a supermodel!

M

adeline’s story captured the world’s attention from the minute it went viral, with nearly seven million people following the inspiring weight loss journey that kick-started her modelling career. As the first down syndrome supermodel, the young woman now uses her social media platforms to inspire others by sharing her journey. Madeline has been featured in leading publications; Vogue, Cosmopolitan, Woman’s Day, Women’s Weekly, New York Times, Elle, and Marie Claire to name a few. And now the lovely Madeline features in BLUSH Magazine ... this issue is all about freedom, liberation, and new starts, so we asked Madeline and her mother/manager Rosanne; What would you say gives you a sense of freedom?

Madeline has modelled in New York Fashion Week, Paris Fashion Week, London Fashion Week, Art Hearts Fashion Week, Style Fashion Week, Melange Fashion Week, Caspian Fashion, Runway Dubai, Mercedes Benz Fashion Week China, Birmingham Fashion Week, Sunshine Coast Fashion Festival, and dozens of others globally. What is your favourite place to visit in the world and why? New York of course!! It is my favourite place in the world and very close to my heart. My career was kick-started in New York; I love New York Fashion Week and I have so many amazing memories there. I look forward to returning every fashion season.

I always try to remember that the difficult times are only temporary

Walking on the runway – there is no feeling like it! It’s freeing, comforting, something I’m excited about and I just feel at home walking on the catwalk now.

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Madeline Stuart

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At the point of this interview, Madeline has just returned from another New York Fashion Week – her life seems hectic and involves a lot of travel; How would you describe your life? Incredible! I am so lucky to live the life I do, I have worked very very hard to get where I am, so it is amazing that it comes along with so many perks! I get to travel the world, walk catwalks across the globe and most importantly, inspire thousands of people, and change the world for the better. That is the most wonderful and amazing thing about my life. It couldn’t have always been that easy for Madeline and her mother though; How do you overcome challenges?

successful women inspire me

I have learnt to never give up and to stay strong even when things are difficult. There have been a lot of times throughout my career when things have become very hard, but I always try to remember that the difficult times are only temporary and if I keep at it, then I can overcome any problem life throws at me. I have a very determined attitude and I am very passionate about my work, so it is easier to stay motivated with that mind-set.

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adeline Stuar BLUSH | L E I S U R E & L I F E S T Y L E

Mind-set is indeed key to continual success, and how about the physical side? Tell us about your fitness routine and how this helps you with overall independence? I train with a personal trainer six days a week – sometimes twice a day – morning and afternoon. I love the gym; it is part of my lifestyle now, and I can’t imagine going without it! It is certainly a very important part of my day and a time I always enjoy. When I am travelling, my days can be extremely busy and my day-to-day activities are changing all the time, so it is very nice when I am home to have a consistent routine of going to the gym every morning. Plus, it is such a great way to start every day! What inspires you?

Lots of things inspire me. My mum; she is incredibly hardworking, kind, loving and has always been my best-friend, number one supporter, and advocate. I look up to her every day. Those who are kind and loving know matter what – these people inspire me. Other advocates and successful women inspire me, like Karlie Kloss, Lady Gaga, Winne Harlow and Ashley Graham.

Madeline supports dozens of Non-Profits some of which she has made special appearances at, or for which she has performed a professional dance routine, or modelled in their fundraising Fashion Shows. Such charities include: Multi Cap Foundation, Endeavour Foundation Australia, Silver Linings Project, Vets Intl, The DisABILITY Museum, Melbourne City Mission, The Carol Galvin Foundation, Kulture City, Embrace Kulture, FUB Sweden, ‘I can, I will’ Australia, Inside Outside Dance Ensemble, Buddy Walk NYC, Horizon Stars – The ARC of the Emerald Coast, Special Olympics of New York, and Cultural Device Project and Radical Beauty Project, among many others. How do you set out to continue inspiring others? I will continue to do what I am doing now, I think the more people see of me in mainstream media, magazines and runway shows, the more they will understand how important equal representation, diversity and inclusion are. I will continue to advocate around the world until it is no longer considered to be inspiring that I walk the professional fashion circuit, but instead, considered normal. madelinestuartmodel.com

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Try it! BLUSH | L E I S U R E & L I F E S T Y L E

You may like it! Trying something new can lead to a new hobby

H

abits are wonderful to establish routine and structure and to ensure we make the absolute most of managing ourselves and our time – so that we can be and do the best for the people around us – but a change of scenery and activity can feel like a holiday! And holidays from the same old routine can do wonders to lift the spirit and keep us emotionally, physically and mentally healthy.

Increased confidence Once you try something new, the chances are it will build your confidence to explore different hobbies and learn more about the world around you – much as you did when you were a child. This helps you to break out of a rut, taking care to think about your needs and to make the most of your day and free time. It also helps you feel more capable to make decisions that feel right for you. New things get you out of roles or ‘pigeon holes’ you may have set for yourself and help you to nurture a more confident and adventurous side to your character.

Learn a new skill Trying something new can lead to a new hobby which can develop into a new skill – be it photography and software for fixing up photos for a family christening; or baking from new recipes; or paddle-

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boarding on your camping holiday.

Honing focus and attention

Sometimes we rule out activities before we’ve even tried them, or always do things in the same way, but when we learn a new skill or hobby, we have to pay full attention to instructions and that steers us away from scattered multitasking approaches and helps us focus our mind in one direction, which has many benefits for other areas of life. With regular effort to become good at our new skill we train our prefrontal cortex (the part of the brain that deals with rational thinking and problem solving) to function more effectively and this has a wider effect on our ability to learn more, and to problem solve more effectively.

Develop an appreciation For the skill, and time, it takes to be able to do something. This helps you appreciate the skills other people supply – both at home and in the workplace. You’ll never say ‘can you quickly draw up this excel spreadsheet…’ again!

Get over fear and anxiety Sometimes we get so used to our own ideas of ourselves and our capabilities that we no longer test those assumptions. We rule out activities before we’ve even tried them, or always do things in the same way. We might find that we’re fretful up a ladder so we never give indoor climbing a try, putting our feelings down to a fear of

heights without considering how we may feel if we’re in a harness with a team of expert trainers to guide our way. Maybe it’s a fear of failing or getting it wrong that stops us. Trying a new activity is a great way to test ourselves and our ability, and to realise that we are more capable than we remember!

Use what you know to build on and get started Join in with the kids’ activities and regain a sense of mobility in your body but also make time to connect with them on their own level (rather than have them join in with the things you like to do). Or meet a friend and try out a new class – maybe something related to an activity that you are familiar with to build on existing strengths, for example if you enjoy swimming then why not try diving? Or if you’re no stranger to indoor climbing why not try abseiling or join an outdoor climbing session to get a taste of the real thing. If you fancy yourself as a hobby artist, why not swap out the paintbrush for a potter’s wheel and try your hand at ceramics. Loved roller-skating as a teenager, then how about checking out the local ice-rink with the kids. Test your boundaries and have fun with it. Read more about how trying something new positively affects our brain development throughout life: The Brain, by David Eagleman Author: A E Lee

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Photographer: @kyaldorsett

Trying something new can lead to a new hobby

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It Works Fashion Designer and Philanthropist Tina Lobondi talks about her social enterprise Esimbi...

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Tell us about the Esimbi social enterprise? The point is to create employment and career opportunities for young people in the UK and Congo. I have personally experienced doing internships and workshops that didn’t end up leading to anything concrete. I just wanted to find the missing element, and I can understand what is needed now. This is how the project came to life. It took about a year to put the process in place. Esimbi means “it works” in Lingala, one of the languages spoken in the DRC. And we – that is myself and the team – have worked really hard to make sure IT works… and we hope that Esimbi will continue to do exactly that.

Why did you choose to set-up Esimbi? I chose to set up Esimbi because it was very hard for me to witness the lack of art and activities in these children’s lives back in Congo, simply because their schools cannot afford the materials they need to turn their creative thoughts into creative things. Being able to express my fears and dreams through drawing, writing or even singing has played a big part in who I am as a person. And, I believe that giving back socially to a community should be on everyone’s bucket list and the work that we are doing with Esimbi is my contribution.

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What is your favourite part of the Esimbi events you organise? My favourite part of any Esimbi event is that people understand the message. It shows me that there is support out there and hopefully this is a sign of longevity for Esimbi as a social enterprise. Of course, the fashion shows go beautifully as well; I love bringing art and design together in a positive fundraising way.

Where is your social enterprise going in the future? Going forward, we want to bring the project to Congo and have some impact there. We hope that once the mini-series will be completed and aired on TV, that

more businesses will want to get involved. In Congo, the challenge is bigger though – there will be a lot of work with the street kids and the schools. Psychologists as well as mentors will be needed to assist the young kids. And this is why this is in a long-term plan, so that we can be prepared for these bigger challenges. We do have a five-year plan, which defines our goals and projects… We are aiming to assist about twenty children each year with their basic needs such as clothing, a home, clean water, education… the basic needs we often take for granted, but are key for future independence, and so this is our main focus. We are looking to collaborate with companies to find volunteers to do workshops within the arts industry.

What impact do you hope to make through your designs and your social enterprise?

I would like to inspire people to follow their dreams but also for them to realise the hard work involved in that process

I would like to inspire people to follow their dreams but also to realise the hard work that is involved in that process. I want young people to see that if you surround yourself with positivity and other likeminded supportive people that life can be good and worthwhile and comfortable. I aim to ‘Inspire | Empower | Achieve’ – which is Esimbi’s motto. The Tina Lobondi label will organise fundraising for Esimbi so that its alliance charities can carry on with their outstanding jobs.

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So maybe my work with Esimbi will inspire me more – I have already designed a very simple but effective Esimbi T-shirt, which helps to support funds for the social enterprise and has been bought and worn by Thandie Newton.

When did you realise you wanted to pursue fashion design, and has African print in particular always been the dream? African print was never on my mind actually. I always see the material as the cherry on the top but not the main dish… I used to draw a lot as a child so I wanted to have a job related to that, and the designs just came to me, and it has all been very organic.

What is the key to success for somebody in the fashion industry?

Photographers: Alessia Francesca Muoio | Eva J

The key to success is persistence... You need to keep going no matter what life throws at you, and learn to trust your gut feelings.

What advice would you offer to anyone wanting to go into a fashion or arts career? I would advise them to practise and observe how a few people work. Learn from other people’s mistakes and take time to make your own, and learn from them too. It is also important to stay with people who have a similar mindset so you can motivate each other during hard times.

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Do you think it is difficult for a woman to be successful in business? I think it is difficult for anyone to be successful in business. From my own experience, women tend to think more than men, so maybe this is the reason why we take longer to blossom. I think that being good at multitasking is our strongest skill.

Do you think being listed in Forbes Afrique can inspire others to be successful? I was listed in Forbes Afrique as one of the entrepreneurs to watch out for and this was truly an honour. I have received many messages from young adults who read the article, saying that it had motivated them to work harder. This is the impact and feedback we want to have with all our projects. @tinalobondi @philanthropistinheels @esimbirdc

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SPRING

trends...

(Japanese Feminine, A Hint of Mint and Pistachio & Caramel)

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Furniture Village Globe Console Table, £299 | Landon Mirror, £149

A

s the sun rises into spring equinox and we look forward to blossoming florals and lighter evenings, Furniture Village are

here to walk us through some of spring/ summer’s most covetable trends to help you make the most of this lively season. Whether you’re planning to introduce a few fresh touches here and there or a complete interiors overhaul, Furniture Village has a whole host of creative ideas to help inspire your latest project. Drawing inspiration from Eastern design, to retro styling and popular palettes of warm caramel, soft pistachio and earthy mint, Furniture Village will guide you through the latest trends.

T

his year expect a springtime twist on Japanese-inspired interiors, with subtle feminine touches. Spaces remain calm and uncluttered with no more furniture than is strictly necessary

(a nod to Marie Kondo’s lifechanging ‘Konmari’ method!); in true Japanese form, the designs speak for themselves. A largely neutral palette can be found throughout but flashes of teal, amber and light pinks add character and liveliness, echoing those first signs of spring that appear after a long winter. Eye-catching design details, such as gold capped legs and a stunning ceramic top – as seen on the new Como Dining Table, serve to elevate the scheme, adding a hint of

Furniture Village Habufa Detroit Bar Table, £1,095 | Habufa Bar Stool, £299 each | Globe Console Table, £299 | Landon Mirror, £149

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understated luxury that chimes effortlessly with the ethos of this trend. It wouldn’t be spring in Japan without cherry blossom and a single sprig is used here to add height and drama to the look.

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Furniture Village Oceano 3 Seater Leather Sofa, £1,195 | Nordic Lamp Table, £249

Furniture Village Como Dining Table, £599 | Como Pair of Two Dining Chairs, £299

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ight, airy and beautifully neutral, mint is set to be the colour of 2020. Intertwining with the fast-growing trend of wholeness and wellbeing, this hue evokes a sense of tranquillity that society strives to achieve both inside and outside of the home.

A potent mix of calming blue and revitalising green, this invigorating and optimistic hue can be channelled in any room of the home. For the season ahead, Furniture Village has played to its strengths as a neutral shade and created a scheme that is pared-back and cool. Design-led upholstered furniture in elegant shades of grey sit strikingly against a fresh mint backdrop that complements the space without dominating. The new ercol Bellaria chaise sofa is perfect for this trend. Exclusive to Furniture Village and featuring a Mid-Century inspired wooden frame, it suits the look and feel of this space down to a T. Soft furnishings and smaller accessories in a range of blue-green hues enhance the motif and touches of brown help to ground the look, moving it on from the classic pastel trend of previous seasons.

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or those looking to step away from traditional spring-like hues, introduce a warmer palette of soft

Furniture Village ercol Bellaria Chaise Sofa, £2,205 | Madrid Table Lamp, £179 | Chic Fabric Scatter Cushion, £35 | Cube Velour Teal Cushion, £29

pistachio greens and

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rich shades of caramel,

to create a beautifully liveable look that evokes happy memories of late summer days. To recreate this trend, we’ve chosen beautifully crafted, yet understated furniture that’s perfectly suited to everyday living. Soft Italian leathers in elegant neutral shades are complemented by natural wood finishes and industrial-inspired black frames. Set against a light pistachio backdrop, flashes of caramel are introduced through smaller accessories such as cushions and vases and further enhanced by wooden tones and natural elements such as pampas grass. Small touches of gold found across mirrors and lamps, add a subtle touch of luxury that offsets the earthier elements of the look.

Furniture Village ercol Taranto Large Sideboard, £2,169

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iece together your spring/ summer interior plans by visiting Furniture Village’s website, where you’ll find ‘The Home of Inspiration’. Here, you’ll discover a

wealth of articles dedicated to home updates, such as how to introduce seasonal colours, what to consider when purchasing a new bed or sofa, as well as keeping you up to date with the latest interior trends: furniturevillage.co.uk

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Freedom to fly!...

My name is Hayley Jordan, I have an autoimmune disorder (HLA-B27) and two different autoimmune diseases – Primary Sclerosing Cholangitis, (a liver disease), and Ankylosing Spondylitis, (arthritis of the spine and hips) – These affect my day-today wellbeing and ability to travel... Despite this, I’ve moved from my home country of New Zealand to live and work in Manchester in the UK, and solo travel around Europe as much as I possibly can... Here are some of my travelling experiences... My arthritis is managed by injecting medication that requires refrigeration at all times: This has caused issues at airports and at some accommodations.

visit and let them know that I need to use the staff fridge for the medication (sometimes a bit of a struggle to explain with nonEnglish speaking countries). I can’t share a ‘community’ fridge as my medication costs six-hundred pounds per injection and I can’t risk someone taking it out or playing around with it.

Going through security is anxietyinducing, especially American airports.

I have to use a special insulated travel bag that cost me more money than I’d like to admit – I had to buy a special one that would keep medication at a temperature between two-eight degrees Celsius for twenty-four hours. I have to prepare the ice-coolers two days in advance, and then I have to have evidence from my doctors that it’s my medication and I need to carry it on board. When I moved to the UK I had a ‘stockpile’ of medication from New Zealand – Twelve injections in one cold bag, and because the travel time is around thirty hours I still needed to buy temperature monitors to keep everything in check and even ask for bags of ice from the flight attendants to keep my medication at the right temperature. Going through security is anxiety-inducing, especially American airports. I never have a ‘normal’ security experience, I’m always pulled to the side and interrogated, usually for five minutes while they go through my travel bag and do extra x-rays or swabs. Strangely enough, it was in Iceland, where I was held back for fifteen minutes while the security person called over her supervisor and they both searched and swabbed everything, asking me question after question like I was up to something suspicious. In accommodations such as hostels I have to email ahead of my

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Of course, these aren’t the worst things in the world, maybe time-consuming and frustrating at best... But it all reminds me that I’m not ‘normal’ and I have to live a different life than ablebodied people. I can still do most of the same things, I just have to meticulously plan ahead — nothing can be left to chance!

I easily get extremely fatigued. It’s sometimes difficult to travel with able-bodied people who don’t understand my full sleep schedules or my need for regular rests. Often, I prefer to travel alone – this is a mixture of lonely and liberating at times. I’ve had to readjust my idea of a fun holiday – I would never sign myself up for an Ibiza style party destination with friends! Nor would I do a twentyto-thirties Euro-trip tour, because I would pretty quickly become the ‘wet blanket’ of the group when I’d have to leave early to sleep or rest. I feel like I’m missing out sometimes, seeing people live it up at Glastonbury for five straight days or do a full moon party in Thailand; things I would never feel comfortable doing now for fear of becoming the burden.

My weekend in Budapest.

Kim-Maree

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It does feel liberating to do short trips (two-three days) to cities in Europe, like Budapest, where I can come and go from my Airbnb as I please, check out a cool ruin bar for an hour and then head off when I want to, and go to sleep rather than do an all-nighter. I get to do a holiday according to what’s best for me and what I enjoy doing. But similarly, I am a firm believer that happiness shared is happiness doubled, so I try and invite a friend that I trust on some holidays. It’s important to feel like someone ‘has my back’ when I need to rest, or we both understand that it’s okay for them to go out and party but I’m going to head back to the hotel. I need to have that level of support and trust with people I choose to travel with, so we can both truly relax and enjoy the holiday, otherwise, I feel like I’m trying to overcompensate and ‘keep up’, when I know I can’t.

Due to my liver disease, alcohol is out of the question. Being able to enjoy the nightlife and bar scene of any destination is not something I can do or particularly enjoy now that I can’t be involved. I haven’t had a hangover in about six years now, so I love to get up and find a beautiful place for brunch or start walking the city while the heat is less intense and there are fewer tourists around! Walking around a new city with a coffee at nine on a Sunday morning is something I’ve really enjoyed doing. Many of my activities are much the same as anyone else’s – walking tours, sight-seeing, restaurants, galleries, shopping and so. I just avoid late-night bars (I’m in bed by midnight most of the time!) and high-energy activities – going on a six-hour hike through mountains would probably kill me now, but a three-hour walk around a nature reserve is much more achievable. I recently used some Lime Scooters in Budapest and it was amazing! I could travel double the distance in a day and see everything on my to-do list while using half the energy. Little things like that make travelling more accessible to me... and more exciting!

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Most of the time I don’t bother with travel insurance anymore. I am immediately rejected for any pre-existing conditions cover, and companies are then wary about covering me for anything else healthrelated. I try to travel despite this and hope that my EHIC card will cover anything that suddenly comes up. Find forums and support groups that chat about your illness or disability and see what others recommend regarding insurance. Different illnesses often have different quirks, and different insurance companies are more ‘educated’ than others. Some companies have a list of ‘absolute no-nos’ and they decline you immediately, others will have a set of questions about your illness and determine cover based upon your answers, for example, have you been hospitalised in the last twelve months? or have you had a transplant, and what medication are you taking? Those in your support groups will have tried and tested so many companies that you are sure to find one pretty quickly that they recommend. Also, I generally try to avoid high-risk activities... No bungee jumps off bridges, or mopeds through tiny European streets without helmets for me! While I’m covered in case of an emergency such as a car accident, anything related to my spine or liver is just a no-go zone of preexisting arguments. If I hurt my spine due to an accident, would they be happy to cover all resulting treatments? What if my arthritis made the healing process take longer and they could argue out of paying for any of it? I don’t want to find out! Travelling means I take any level of risk with me, but I try, and I minimise what I am able to control.

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I would never sign myself up for an Ibiza style party destination with friends.

The world doesn’t want me travelling. Living with disabilities and illnesses essentially rules you out as a ‘useful’ person to the economy. I work full time in a good job, I haven’t been hospitalised since I’ve been diagnosed (five years now), but getting visas that cover healthcare or travel insurance that isn’t irresponsibly expensive means that I have limited options to live my life. I have dreams and aspirations like any twenty-something-year-old, but at twenty-two I had to say ‘goodbye’ to a lot of opportunities – that just closed-up in an instant. It’s been difficult, but I’m making it work... I’m extremely lucky and grateful that I’m currently achieving one of my dreams – moving to England and starting a new life here. It wasn’t easy and continues to be difficult at times, but I have wanted to do this since I was young. Being away from my support networks in New Zealand has been the biggest challenge – having a chronic illness means you need help sometimes from the people who love and care for you, and I had to build that support network all over again once I moved here. My other dreams are to continue travelling around Europe and to see as much of the world as I can while I’m still mostly healthy and as mobile as possible. I don’t want to miss out on learning about new places, meeting new people, and experiencing beautiful things that make me feel alive. I want to do well in my career, keep creative and achieve work that I’m proud of. I also want to settle down and have a family sometime soon – that comes with its own set of challenges, but I’m hopeful that I’ll get to experience that too. Twitter: @hayleyfrmNZ

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Photographer: Qrypton Productions

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1

Switch your desert vehicle for a camel and

Take an ultimate

go for a more relaxed

travel action selfie

adventure with your

of you flying in

friends, perhaps try a

the desert – simply

guided tour at twilight

jump and get a friend to

when the temperature

snap you in action.

drops a bit.

2

When in the ‘desert city’ it would be rude not

wheel drive and a driver,

4

and sit back and enjoy

delighted by the lit-up buildings

the ride – but hold on

amongst the dark sky. The 2,717

to raise that adrenaline with quad-biking across the dunes. If you prefer, you can hire a four-

tight!

There are nightclubs in Dubai – but even if you venture out for an after-

meal evening stroll – you will be

Dubai 7 Things to Try

feet tall Burj Khalifa – the tallest tower in the world – looks stunning at night.

5

Board an Abra (a boat) and

be ferried across with culture and in style to the Dubai creek.

7

Be inspired by the opulent furniture and accessories that line the hotels, establishments and

outlets in Dubai. As well as by the iconic architecture of the buildings – both modern and some more traditional. The Atlantis Hotel, The Palm’s pink building

6

is reported to be the world’s most Enjoy the views from your

Instagramed hotel, and includes The Lost

accommodation; either

Chambers Aquarium.

observe the hustle and bustle

of the street from a height, or stretch out in a roof top pool and soak up the vast sky and skyline.

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Find out more about a visit to this city in the United Arab Emirates visitdubai.com sevenstarmedia.co.uk


BLUSH | U LT I M AT E T R AV E L

New York

New you!

One of the most iconic cities in the world will make you look at life from a whole new perspective‌ through the lens of the movies

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here is a list as long as the Statue of Liberty is tall of how many movies have been filmed or set in New York City. A visit there will have you experiencing what Kevin McCallister felt like when he saw the magnificence of the Plaza Hotel, and the sheer size of Central Park – with the horses, pigeons, squirrels, and that iconic bridge where he caught the bad guys in Home Alone 2. And if you visit at Christmas or New Year you’ll get to see the enormity of the Rockefeller Centre Christmas Tree. Visit the National History Museum near Central Park where The Night of the Museum 2 was filmed and get a photo next to some of the movie star artifacts. The true NYC star (starring in Ghostbusters 2 amongst many) has to be the Statue of Liberty with her strong message of freedom signified through her broken shackles, her Independence Day book, the crown that represents seven rays of sunbursts spreading reason and enlightenment throughout the world and her torch of truth and justice. If you are planning to climb to the top of the crown, book ahead of time to avoid disappointment, and be mindful as it is a confined space and requires a decent level of fitness to cope with all those stairs.

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Photographer: Rex Martin

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No stairs needed though at the Empire State building – what a relief! Because you can travel right to the top via elevators, including to the recently extended floor with panoramic windows. The nighttime visit is a treat not to be missed – and there are less queues too! Sleepless in the City, and King Kong are amongst the few hundred films that have featured this building. If you stay in or near Times Square there is plenty to see and most things are walking distance including Broadway for top entertainment. Even some restaurants have singing during mealtimes – everything is an opportunity for a show! The Twin Towers Memorial is a taxi ride away and there are plenty of those yellow vehicles around. The fire trucks, and NYPD cars are also reminiscent of the film and TV industry, as are the street food trucks and the pot holes with steam that rises from the ground into the street – no doubt The Ninja Turtles are hanging out eating New York style thick crust very cheesy pizza. If you want to dress like a star head to Macy’s or any of the 5th Avenue stores and you’ll be sure to find some new clothes for the new you in New York too!

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Apsley of Londo

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PERFECT

TRAVEL

COMPANION

Apsley of London England is a British brand that preserves a traditional heritage aesthetic for the global voyager. The patented Apsley Original, by founder Lucy J Layton, is highly versatile and converts from a day bag, into an evening accessory and a convenient clutch.

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he Apsley is a luxury handbag, identified by its signature interchangeable sections built to suit every style for the modern, busy woman. The signature flip design is the inspiration from founder and designer Lucy J Layton, who for many years, travelled globally working across the fashion and media industries. Like any frequent and well-heeled traveller, Lucy often struggled when it came to streamlining her packing, torn between which bag to take to match an extensive wardrobe, which was vital when working on a shoot or on location.

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From losing suitcases to exceeding luggage allowance, these experiences led the young entrepreneur to look for alternative options to ensure she was always prepared for any occasion, whilst keeping on-trend and looking stylish of course! Nothing presented itself, until, on one particular trip, walking around the beautiful markets of Bahrain, she observed the vast array of handmade local designs. The experience inspired her to create her own unique accessory design – The Apsley bag was born. Lucy realised that her need was also a need of many other practical yet stylish women – Not wanting to feel encumbered with multiple bags and options for all outfit changes, emptying contents of one bag into another, risking leaving wallets or keys, or a favourite lipstick at home. The patented Apsley bag changes its skin like a chameleon, able to adapt its colours just as often as you change your clothes. Its compact style and easy-to-wear design enables the owner to go from airport, to city centre, to night out – all with just one bag. Easily and effortlessly.

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BLUSH | S T Y L E The bag’s interchangeable design allows for simple transitions from day to night; from casual to smart; from black to beige; all in one elegant and versatile bag – making it an ideal choice for businesswomen, and busy mums – not to mention having trendsetter and jetsetter appeal. “It’s been fascinating to meet our broad customer base,” says founder Lucy, “-and watch them walk away with a sparkle in their eye – excited to try something new and innovative; stylish, but also more useful than their average handbag purchase”. Featured twice last year in British Vogue and cited by the Good Web Guide as ‘A Paradigm Shift in handbags for women’, Lucy is delighted with the response. “It’s also wonderful getting feedback on colours that customers would like us to bring out in the future. The fun thing about owning your own Apsley bag, is that one can purchase a single clutch purse in a variety of colours and add it to their original chosen colour scheme. As more colours hit the

It’s one handbag with over ten different ways to wear it, in four colours.

stores, wearers are able to get involved in the creative process of handpicking their own personal colour combinations. Every Apsley customer is the painter of their own story.” Lucy is growing the brand ‘Apsley of London England’ in an eco-direction; now sourcing plant-based materials for her next collection, “It is really where the world is going right now and of course should be going, especially with ever pressing global warming concerns. If I can make sure my brand is British heritage in style, but also with forward thinking materials and a forward-thinking design - I’m hoping more companies in the fashion industry will follow on too’.

You can order an Original Apsley handbag online at apsleybags.com Exclusive discount code for Blush readers: BLU2020 (Redeem at online checkout for £20 off your Apsley Handbag.)

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Spring Loaded Bloom into your own special kind of beauty, ready to shine throughout Summer with retro vibes and pastel patterns‌

Dress: Lavish Alice Glasses: Giorgio Armani Earrings: Model’s own Necklace: Vintage

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Dress: Rock & Religion, available at ASOS Hat: Vintage Necklace: Stylist’s own Boots: Model’s own

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bug off Shoot Credits: Photographer: @adamwowkstills | Model: @imjayderyan Creative Director & Wardrobe Stylist: Jordan Martin

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Prints.

Mia Midi Dress £105.00 trafficpeople.co.uk

Patterns.

POLKA-DOTS. There is nothing more liberating when it comes to fashion than doing something that is so wrong it is right … Gone are the faux-pas days when mixing your florals with spots, and checkers with stripes were well and truly a case for the fashion police ... 2020 is the year to free those patterns and mix them up in one beautifully discombobulated ensemble… 64

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Women’s Ink Floral Patch Scarf in Ecru 951767 £22.50 fatface.co.uk

Flamingo Cow Hide Clutch Bag with Tassel, £50 by Hicks & Brown, available at hicksandbrown. com

Add a cultural twist to an outfit with a vibrant scarf. Salcombe Shirt Harbour Stripe Dark, £49.95 by Schöffel Country, available at schoffelcountry.com

Floral Eve shirt Made with Liberty fabric, £69.95 by The Oxford Shirt Company, available at oxfordshirt.co.uk

Pioggia trainer, £149.95 by Keith Scarrott, available at keithscarrott.co.uk

Mono Floral Cami in Soft Coral Style 949579 £22.50 fatface.co.uk

If you are mixing lots of patterns – the bigger the style and the bolder the colour the better the result.

FatFace Esther Floating Floral Skirt in Black Style 950268 Fatface.co.uk sevenstarmedia.co.uk

Choose plain fabrics with exposed vibrant patterns. Dress: Tina Lobondi

Victorine rubber clogs, £37 a aigle.com/uk

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Step 4:

GET THE LOOK:

The Badu Do Our associations with wearing headscarves are somewhat constructed by societal and cultural lore – and so if we are faced with a situation when we have to consider covering our head due to treatment, or because we simply wish to try a new accessory then it can be overwhelming as to where to start and how to wear a head scarf. Erykah Badu is known for wearing a headscarf, bright and high – and she has inspired a wearable, daily style that is easy to achieve – Here are the simple style steps for you to follow: Step 1:

Step 2:

Step 3:

Choose a long scarf, or fold length ways and place over the head and ears with equal sides; hold in place.

Cross over the sides at the back and then swap hands; pull in place so it feels secure but comfortable.

Bring the fabric up to the front of the head and cross over again, pulling in place.

Tuck one side through the other to secure further. Depending on the fabric and your hair thickness you may wish to secure with grips.

Step 5: Twist the remaining length of the sides around each other. Ensure that it is tight but comfortable.

Step 6: Dress the twist to one side and tuck the scarf in or you can twist into a central position for an alternative style.

TIP: You may need to braid hair or brush it back and tie in a low ponytail. If hair is thinning or short take care not to catch or pull as you tie the scarf. Graphic Illustrations: @ChanelCen

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FLY

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FREE... with faith in your ability to have and to hold a personal sense of identity – from this day forward; for better, for worse; for richer, for poorer; in sickness, in health; to love and to cherish. Your beautiful self. Forever.

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NEVER OBEY.

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DECISIONS ARE BUT YOUR OWN TO MAKE. sevenstarmedia.co.uk

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BLUSH | S T Y L E Shoot credits: Hair by Vicki Lord (vickilordbridalhair.co.uk) Concept and words by Jordan Martin (jordanmartin.biz) Gowns by Ian Stuart (@ianstuart_bride) Make-up by Anne-Marie Simak (colouryourlifecoaching.com) Photographer: Dawn Marie Jones (stoyanovandjones.com) At Belair House in West Dulwich London

WISE CHOICES. sevenstarmedia.co.uk

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Liberate

Your Love Life

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arth to all those reading – you don’t have to be swinging from the chandeliers in nothing but nipple tassels to enjoy a healthy lovely sex life, (with or without a partner). The point is, sex is an important part of being human – it is a pleasure and energetically cathartic, and it can make us feel great on several levels... releasing those happy hormones; and making us feel loved and valued – this is the case if you are selfpleasuring or with a partner (or several). There are no limitations on what you could do in the bedroom – or indeed, in the car, the kitchen and so on ... but sex doesn’t have to be raunchy and experimental to be great, because a nice slice of afternoon vanilla delight can be just what the doctor ordered. The main thing whenever referring to sexual activity is for it to be mutually consensual. And this leads to the first of these seven sexy tips that will have you feeling liberated when it comes to your love life...

Tip 1:

If you don’t like it – don’t do it – but don’t mock it if you haven’t tried it either. Know the difference between being curious and feeling safe enough to try something new, compared with feeling pressured either by peers or by your partner. Just because your best friend enjoys something and raves about it over your catch-up coffee doesn’t mean it is right for you and your partner. And just because your partner wants you to do something – even

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if you are in a committed relationship – this doesn’t mean it is something you have to do! For those in committed partnerships, if there are clashes with styles of how and where and what you enjoy in the bedroom, then you are going to have to communicate more; discuss what it is you are both after from each other and this alone can be liberating, and even a form of foreplay.

Tip 2: Moving nicely on to foreplay – some people love it, some get bored, some don’t get it at all – or understand it. Foreplay can be as basic as a wink, or a flirtatious look or comment, a gentle touch or a full-on grope; leading on to more intimate interactions. Again, you need to be able to communicate with your partner – this does not mean stopping half way through an interaction and asking a practical or scientific question, (often a massive turn off). We’ve all been there! Human communication is made up of over 80% body language and other signals – so if you can sense your partner needs a little assistance unwinding, then help them out a bit – you are in this together so to speak... and if it is you that needs some extra prep time then encourage it or discuss this with your partner at a convenient point – so when the time arrives it isn’t a surprise when you grab their head and direct it to a desired spot. Tip 3: Know when to stop talking. A little bit of flirtatious banter is great. As is a tad bit of pillow talk. Or Raunchy chat! But there is a fine balance right!? Communicate, yes. But hold back on those off-putting conversations for when you are doing the dishes and not when you are doing each other. Try not to even think distracting thoughts, you know the ones like – What should I make for dinner? Or did I lock the car? Or what is that strange mark on their shoulder? If you have any level of conversation

with your own thoughts or with each other, then it is bound to be about general life; the stresses, the special moments, the family tension, finances... and the list goes on. All passion killers! You want to liberate your mind and free thoughts so you can enjoy each other... whether you are new partners and you are fretting over the other’s judgment, or long-term partners that need to discuss the loft conversion – just shush already! Park it all for now, and free yourself. Yep, let go completely and enjoy what comes. You may have to physically bite your tongue to stop thinking or talking... better still go in for the kiss and gently bite your partner’s lips. There, easy! Sharing a shower can also help you both stop the chatter, or massaging each other to a point of relaxation (another great foreplay option).

Tip 4: No tipples... You probably are screaming at the page at this point. Look, one glass of something is nice to unwind. But drunk sex isn’t that liberating – it is a pseudo liberator – yes, the inhibitions are down – but it’s sexier to choose the passion and togetherness without the clumsiness, fuzzy head or bloated feeling. Tip 5: First timers – those who are getting down to it with a new partner for the first time – may want to consider keeping it simple. See what happens naturally – enjoy each other. Learn about each other’s bodies. Even go slow... but maybe it is best to save the kinky ideas for the second, third, or future date; this way neither of you will be pressured to perform, and you won’t be setting expectations. Sorry to sound like your mother - but be prepared too! Ensure you have contraception covered, unless of course you are planning a family immediately, then go with the flow and the more relaxed you are, the more likely you will conceive straightaway. sevenstarmedia.co.uk

Author: J P Martin

Look, let’s just jump to it ... we’re talking about S E X ...


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Tip 6: Liberation comes with knowing your own mind and body – and so take the time to feel your body, the curves, the skin and so on – what you like the feel of and the sensations that arise naturally – so when you are with your partner and you recognise these same sensations you can go with it and enjoy the journey. Self-pleasure is like any other self-learning. There are many people that consider it cheating, that consider it dirty even or consider it ‘abnormal’ – and so just as with Tip 1 – do not feel pressured to try masturbation if it makes you feel uncomfortable – but self-love and self-freedom are important connections before finding these things within a relationship with another person. So, if you want to wear new beautiful or sexy lingerie – do it because it makes you feel great – it is when we feel our most confident and free that our partner gets to enjoy it. It is not selfish to think of ‘me’ first – it is sensible. Tip 7:

Photo credit: Pexels Image

Be playful, and remove expectation of what you think sex ‘should’ be like... just enjoy being next to your partner. Life is about a balance of give and take and consider this when sharing sex with someone. When we feel free within ourselves we get this balance spot-on and love and sex and conversation and all that is involved in a healthy physical, emotional, and mentally stimulating love life become so easy and natural that you stop thinking about it and you just allow it to unfold, and this is the definition of a liberating love life.

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let go completely and enjoy what comes

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Butt... do I have to!? If you think that hours of running on the treadmill is going to get you the butt you’ve always wanted, then think again, because Personal Trainer Marc Dressen says “Research shows that targeted fat loss is just a myth”, so here are five of the best butt exercises that will actually tone, sculpt and lift...

1. SQUAT: This form of body-sculpting is one of the most effective exercises when it comes to building muscularity in the lower body, and strength. If you want a great butt and fantastic legs, then you need to squat deep, and use a wider stance. Why? Because the deeper you squat, the more work your legs and butt need to do. You can take these to jump squats too: make sure you keep your form as you jump and land.

2. DEADLIFT: Once you’ve mastered the squat, it will be time to move on to the deadlift. This exercise trains every aspect of your body at once. It is particularly beneficial when it comes to building your glutes and hamstrings, because it involves a lot of interaction with these areas.

3. ROMANIAN DEADLIFT (RDL): The beauty of this exercise is it also shapes your thighs and strengthens your lower back at the same time. Ask your personal trainer at the gym to show you the most effective way to do these weightlifting deadlift exercises.

4. HIP THRUST: This is the secret weapon for building up the muscles in your butt – and you’ll find it in almost every athlete’s routine. There are plenty of variations for the types of hip thrust that you can do, but for getting a great butt, you should focus on singleleg, band, and barbell options.

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The bottom line is that the process for building an incredible butt is no secret. All you need to accomplish great things is persistent work with easy, straightforward exercises. 5. THE LUNGE: Last but not least, this incredibly basic and popular movement is excellent for carving out great glutes. Though some people still don’t recognise the lunge as the perfect movement for butt exercise – research has shown that the glutes are essential for pulling you back to the standing position. If you can’t do regular lunges due to problems with your knees, you can always opt for a reverse lunge instead. The bottom line is that the process for building an incredible butt is no secret. All you need to accomplish great things is persistent work with easy, straight-forward exercises. Combining the knowledge and exercises we’ve outlined above should get you on the road to an incredible butt in no time. For safe and effective workouts head to: marcdressen.com

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Medical condition experts We compare insurers Specialist cruise cover

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Good GUT

Did you know that an octopus has three hearts? It needs them to pump enough blood around the body and to the gills. And did you know that humans have three brains? This is because we are made up of more than just our minds – which is the thinking machine. Another brain is our heart – the feeling centre. And the third brain is our gut! Chrisoula Sirigou tells us why we need to listen to our third brain for overall goodness...r

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f our gut is not healthy, it affects the way we think; it affects our clarity and therefore, it has an impact on the way we feel and act. It might sound a bit random, but the fact is, our digestive system and our brain share some of the same neurotransmitters responsible for sending messages between nerve cells, such as serotonin; key in supporting a positive mood. Hippocrates said “All disease begins in the gut”, and many chronic metabolic diseases do. What we eat to nourish our bodies has an impact on our gut. We may perhaps neglect it, because it’s not something we can see. But our gut is not separate from the rest of our body – it’s an integral part of our

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physical biology and a leaky gut with an ineffective gut lining and without enough good bacteria is unable to absorb nutrients effectively, which can affect us physically, mentally and emotionally. It could manifest in your mood, if you become irritated easily, if you have a lack of tolerance and find situations or people

It’s the heavier, unhealthy food that makes us feel sluggish and unmotivated

get on your nerves very easily. We can all relate to that feeling of butterflies in the stomach when we are feeling anxious about something. Think of it another way: We are what we consume – whatever we expose ourselves to during the course of a day, whatever we allow our senses to take in from the world around us, be it junk food, conflict with family or colleagues, or the effects of prepackaged convenience foods. Using simple ingredients that have not been processed and starting with the healthy foods that you enjoy is the easiest way to introduce more nourishment into your system; fresh fruit and vegetables; home-baked anything, so you know what has gone into making it; eating when you are hungry and learning to listen to what your body is telling you it craves, and why it is craving it. Loving your gut requires daily cleansing; one of my ‘rituals’ is to have a glass of warm water and fresh lemon first thing in the morning. This ensures a better balance of acid and alkaline in my system. Healthy food supports us energetically within the body. It’s the heavier, unhealthy food that makes us feel sluggish and unmotivated. I believe it’s about taking a step-by-step approach; readjusting, and learning and readjusting again. And also, believing that there is a way you can do it: a way to heal and to be WHOLE again, regardless of minor setbacks. Because this is what ‘holistic’ actually means. For more holistic tips, healing remedies and therapies visit: chrisoulasirigou.com. Or tune into Chrisoula’s ‘Health and Healing’ show on RedShift Radio Thursdays 1pm-2pm (Repeat show on Saturdays 1pm-2pm).

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TRIGGER WARNING:

MENTAL HEALTH TOPIC This is not my story, this is the story of my two children: The eldest is Bi-Polar with psychotic outbursts. The youngest has anxiety and depression that can manifest into self-harm. My own story is that I don’t have a Mental Health issue! And I don’t know what to do to be a part of my children’s stories, or whether I even should be...

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hat do you do when your beautiful vibrant child becomes so heightened and agitated that you can’t understand what they are saying? You can’t decipher the words that are coming out of their mouth like a machine gun! When your child then suddenly drops so low that they hate so deeply and they are unable to lift their own head up due to the weight of loathing for everything and everyone around them? What do you do when your child is manic then psychosis sets in? What would you do with the violent, trashing of the room, screaming and lashing out at her family; when the police and the paramedics come and your child has no idea the reasons why –

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even as she stands amongst the turned over furniture and smashed crockery? What do you do when they look at you with so much confusion? They look at you with hatred in their eyes, so much hate! What do you do? What do you do when you are presented with a Family Violence Order to ‘protect’ you from your own child? What do you do when your youngest child; your baby, just can’t seem to find happiness? When you find out that they don’t like their life! What do you do when you realise that your youngest child starts to cut themselves in order to release the pain they feel? What do you do when you ask them why they feel so sad and they can’t tell you, they have no idea the reasons why? What do you do when your child is covered in scars from self-harming? What do you do when your child moves away to start their own life without any support; when that child refuses to leave their apartment for days on end? What do you do when they just stop talking to humans; when you can’t reach them by phone and there is no one else around other than the police to check on them? What do you do when they tell you that you are overreacting and they won’t take your calls for a while; when they tell you to calm down that they are fine… this time. As their mum, what do I do? There seems to be no real reasons for their Mental Health issues; not ones that are tangible, some actual things I can point to

and say “ah ha so they’re the reasons why!” But that’s what I need! Reasons behind Mental Health rearing its ugly head into their beautiful lives. I need things to blame for the feelings my children cannot control, the feelings I cannot fix. And that there, perhaps, is the actual issue; I have made their Mental Health about me, about my story. But their stories are not mine! My eldest daughter ‘Thalia’ is the life of the party; so much fun and energetic – she is Bi-Polar and has bouts of violent psychosis. My youngest daughter ‘Herahni’ is a little more reserved but the friend everyone wants – she suffers with depression, and she self-harms. Both girls are popular, witty, very intelligent and beautiful, and they have a pathological need to destroy themselves on varying levels. They had a pretty good upbringing; no violence, no alcohol to speak of, we are an open family – so no taboo topics. We discussed with honesty all worldly subjects, from human rights to recreational drugs. Growing up, the children didn’t want for much, they lived a comfortable lifestyle. They both got part-time jobs, saved money, went out with friends and did the usual teenage things, but for Thalia everything was done in overdrive; full throttle. As for Herahni, she was a little quieter, reflective and selective. When they both moved away to attend university, there was no outward pressure – no student loans; they were provided with housing; they had financial and family support. Thalia had the opportunity to study abroad including travelling through Europe.

What do you do when your child is manic then psychosis sets in?

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They both graduated from their respective universities; they had done what they had set out to do – get educated and live independently as grown-ups. All in all, the children were lucky and they had no ‘real’ so-called life issues to deal with. It seems that more stories of Mental Health problems are like this one; like mine. Parents are coming out and asking what happened? What did we do or not do? Why are our kids so sad? So-manic? So-disconnected from the world? Why?

As their mum, what do I do?

Loud Vs Silent Thalia is loud, her mental health illness is loud. Herahni is silent; no noise, no drama, no reaction. Both are scary. Both can cause absolute destruction in a heartbeat. After a recent psychotic episode in which Thalia caused a lot of damage to her physical space and to her family; we all went into overdrive – seeking guidance – any help to ensure that she was okay. What we didn’t do however, was tend to Herahni; the firsthand witness to a very violent outburst. Herahni was the one on the phone to the police. Herahni was the one running through the city streets in the early morning desperately trying to find her sister while we cleaned up the physical mess. I left her, because in all honesty, she wasn’t making a noise. It’s the loud that creates attention both good and bad. People radiate to Thalia. But the loud and fast-paced and erratic are draining; non-stop, no rest, no filter. It is at times, clearly very obvious to people who are not close to her that it’s not ‘normal’ to be living at that breakneck pace. But when called out on the speed and velocity at which she lives often incurs a wrath that can see

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you removed from her life, no matter who you are. Herahni and her mental illnesses are silent, innocuous, sitting behind vacant eyes. Herahni can be gregarious and outgoing, but in the blink of any eye will retreat, slip back into the shadows and become an observer. Herahni will easily slip away unnoticed for weeks at a time, moving through the world almost silently. Friends move in and out unsure as to the reasons why they don’t hear from her. Unreturned calls, ignored social media tags, failed catch-ups, the classic calling cards of depression. Herahni is amazingly warm, giving and fun, but it’s an effort that she can’t maintain and she sees no valid reason why she just isn’t allowed to stay inside her own fragile brilliant mind.

Medication and Meditation Thalia refuses to be medicated to live in what she sees as a permanently altered state.

Her approach is focused on taking back control, being active and using life itself to self-medicate. The ability to be aware is the issue, if Thalia is not aware that she is getting louder; her speech more rapid; her mood becoming erratic, then how is she supposed to manage it all? Thalia sees nothing wrong with her moods, or behaviour so therefore considers there is nothing to manage. And she does actually manage everything very well – most of the time. However, I am pretty sure half of her management plan is simply there to appease the rest of us, and really that defeats the purpose of living a safe and authentic life. Thalia is all about the natural life; organic, no chemicals, no meat – at times self-righteous. Her plan is to meditate as self-regulation. Thalia believes that this clean living will in turn clean and clear her moods. She has taken up martial arts to help her regulate her impulses, and she has a journal to note down triggers and situations that set her off. However, there is a big ‘BUT’ in her self-managed plan – she isn’t a peaceloving hippy when she drinks and socialises. Alcohol is abundant as are recreational drugs. And so, the balancing act between social and psycho begins. The issue is that the one or two mismanaged moments have devastating effects. Friends and family, as well as her career, can take a hit and it’s a long slog to regain her life afterwards, even if she isn’t aware of this.

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Herahni regularly delves into her own worries; her fear of everyday nuances that overwhelm and consume her. Suddenly every new thought is a dark space; a battle to be rationalised, but she is not seeking answers. Instead she channels those thoughts of doom and sadness into words, and these words become stories or poems. Herahni is not looking to change her thoughts, instead to observe and reflect. It’s not always healthy and she is the first to admit that. Herhani is medicated and is happy to let professionals like a psychologist be involved in her life. She even has a regular phone session with a therapist to go over her week. Herahni still struggles though, despite all this help. Every day is a new battle to be present in her own life. I am positive that given the chance she would lock herself away from all human contact, write, and watch Netflix every day. The crazy cat lady without the cats. We all laugh about it, but the laughter and joking are our ways of keeping it out there, yet we are all aware of the slippery slope she is on. It’s certainly not all doom and gloom. Herahni, my ‘dark angel’ is a very social person; and can show extremes – with some weeks permanently out or perpetually hungover from a social calendar the Kardashians would struggle to keep up with.

Neuro-typical

not always safe and I cannot protect you. I don’t want to fix you, I just want you to be healthy. When it all rises up, do one small thing to remind yourself that this is not permanent; start to count from one to ten really slowly looking around at where you are, taking note of the sensations in your body; take a shower, wash that sh*t off; drink some water; turn down the lights; lie down and feel your breath; your chest moving; your heart beating; you are here; count again – this time just your breath; your wondrous, amazing breath; you made it and you can keep making it, because you are doing just fine. You are loved and you will never be alone, because I’m always with you; not judging, not wanting you to change, just here with you. As a mum, I worry constantly; a sad lonely ache in the pit of my stomach. I want to take my daughters and hold them close to my chest so, so tight. I wake at night with an absolute dread and have to talk myself out

of calling them to check if they are actually safe. I want them to be safe, to have the help and support from professionals, to be in control of what is happening to them inside their own bodies. But it’s not my problem; I’m just a witness to their problems. I will never turn away from my children, I will be available – always! Over protective? Perhaps! Overreacting and fussing? Probably. Because I am a mum, and they are my children. @movingom If you are affected by any of the content in this story please seek professional care or visit your GP.

What do you do when your youngest child starts to cut themselves in order to release the pain they feel?

Photo credit: Pexels Image

Who decides what the norm is? I am yet to come across anyone who is ‘normal’, and at times I feel as if Mental Health is the must-have new hashtag. Everyone has a story or knows someone who has some pretty intense issues. Does this make us socially numb to the Mental Health concerns that so many people – especially young people – have? The constant barrage of ‘it’s okay, you’re not alone’; of ‘this influencer went through this’ or ‘this blogger knew someone who fill in the gaps -’... Does all this oversharing desensitise us to the reasons behind it all? The reasons why my own daughters do not seem to see the need to address or attend to their needs? Is social media a creative outlet to remove stigma or a cover-up for non-action and complacencies?

A message from Mum Mum wants you to be safe, nothing more than that. Just safe. I have struggled to use the word ‘safe’ as it is my biggest fear for you both; that you are

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WELL WISHES

The following people, businesses and companies would like to extend their very best wishes to everyone at Look Good Feel Better charity, and to support the continued success of BLUS H Magazine...

A

A & S Engineering Acorn Services Anglia Handling Services Ltd

B

Balgores Motor Group Bomag (Great Britian) Ltd

C

Cambrai Covers Cecilia Colman Gallery Charles Bates Kent Ltd Clarke & Simpson Creative Interior Design Ltd Cremtor Pet Cremation

D

DGO Restoration Dragonfly Sign & Design Dry Drayton Estates Drystream

F

H

Hailsham Plant Howard Construction (Anglia) Ltd

I

Ivan Renshaw & Co

K

Kim Systems Ltd Kone Cranes UK Limited

M

Marc Jacobs Fragrance Massive Dynamixx Ltd Mrs Caroll

N

North Lincs Engineering Ltd

R

Rautomead Limited

S

Sewing Corner Software Connection Supacleen Ltd Syscom Building Management Ltd

T

TCS Biosciences Ltd Tim Weeding Building Design Services Tradelinens Ltd

U

UK Gas Technologies

The BLUSH team would like to extend a special ‘thank-you’ to all contributors to this issue.

P

Pryor Begent Fry & Co

Finders International Ltd Flint Hire & Supply

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My first ever affirmations, consist of words I still use today, I don’t know where they came from as I wasn’t older than fourteen. But these words still carry the same impact as they did when I was a girl… “I am the master of my own destiny, I am strong, I am independent.” Choose three affirmations that help you today, and that would have supported the younger you of years ago and nurture your ‘old’ self into the new person you are becoming.

It was at this young age I had discovered the power of positive affirmations – by complete accident!

New Self

Belief Free your negative thoughts with the power of affirmations

Author: J P Martin

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hen I was a child I never actually knew what an affirmation was, but one day I decided that I had to say something to myself as a kind of pep talk… I’m not certain what it was about that particular day… but I often got nervous going to school after the weekend or holidays – there were various reasons for this feeling of anxiety; would I still have people to talk to? Did I remember how to do my subjects? Would I stick out for the wrong reasons? Things many young people, and indeed adults face nowadays returning to a study or workplace, or when starting at new institutions or organisations. It was at this young age I had discovered the power of positive affirmations – by complete accident! I felt some internal need to be kind to myself because this wasn’t really happening externally from those around me… I had to somehow instill self-belief and confidence, because I missed that lesson along the way.

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How do Affirmations work: If we are told something about ourselves enough times then we begin to believe it and eventually we begin to be it… This is why verbal bullying or nasty comments are so detrimental. Affirmations focus on positive aspects about one’s self. When we say positive affirmations, we may not initially believe them to be true, but if we focus and repeat, then we will take them on as fact, because subconsciously our minds connect to our bodies and to our belief systems and other stuff we probably don’t even know about; and as a result, definite positive shifts are made, which reflect the positive affirmations, all as if by magic. Affirmations are most effective when written in first person, as when you read them or recite them, you are literally telling yourself new beliefs about yourself. When I use affirmations in my teachings, I purposely avoid any negative words, because I want to breed the positive amongst every one that reads or hears them.

Examples of simple, but effective daily affirmations are: I know I can. I am a confident, strong individual. I love my self, and I love others.

It is important to really feel the impact of the positive words in your heart’s centre – not just in your mind. So being aware of the sensation the words create within you at the same time as reciting the words will lead to obvious shifts within your belief system.

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