Words Bear Weight: How to utilize one's own privilege for the better

Qnowledge of one’s own privilege

Privileges are advantages and rights that people have due to their status in society. Most people’s privileges are multifaceted and are intertwined in a multitude of ways. Privilege on one front does not rule out other marginalisation and the intersection of these factors moulds our view of the world and how the world views us. Privilege affects the way we as individuals experience society around us, where we are welcome and how we are treated. Most marginalized people are aware of the privileges they possess and, as a result, they’re more likely to show solidarity with other marginalized groups. With more privilege, it becomes easier to forget, or ignore, the marginalization of other groups.

CheQ your privilege

It’s important to be aware of one’s privilege status. Awareness leads to us being able to help and support marginalized and oppressed people. Help consists first and foremost of listening, and believing people’s experiences of the oppression they face in society. Marginalized groups often follow other groups’ organisations working towards equality, and actively support and respect their operations.

“None of us are free until all of us are free” encompasses how it’s important that we support each other in our fight towards freedom. Marginalized groups support each other by being aware of their differing privileges. Queer people shouldn’t stand alone at the forefront of the fight when dealing with prejudice, hate speech and violence. It is vital for non-queer people to carry the torch as well. By checking our own privilege we, in turn, can observe the marginalization of people around us, recognize it and acknowledge the oppression many face every day. Only then can we actively change the situation for the better.

A large part of the problem is Iceland’s image as some equality paradis, and queer paradise. This is not our reality and it doesn’t take a lot of research to realize how far there is yet to go. Most queer people have heard non-queer people and other, privileged people say how hard it is to “say the right things all the time”, or that “nothing is allowed anymore”. The reason for these comments is the fact that marginalized people are setting boundaries, and privileged people need to face the consequences of their words. Hate speech has never been okay - it’s just been easier to get away with it, until now.

Is it too much to ask to speak respectfully of and to marginalized people? The main purpose of choosing our words more carefully is to create space for inclusivity within our language. Many privileged people don’t bother learning other pronouns (other than “he” and “she”) for individuals, which is deeply disrespectful and humiliating for non-binary people who use gender-neutral pronouns. Who would be okay with their name being ignored repeatedly, and if we all would choose each and every name we use for the people around us? Why is this deemed okay when it comes to queer people? Misgendering people means ignoring their identity and diminishing their existence. Queer people (and undoubtedly, many of you readers as well) often hear derogatory discourse about queer people on daily basis, and such comments usually come from non-queer people. This use of words becomes especially prevalent with children and young adults, who hear it at home from their parents and other people around them. This doesn’t only apply to queerness, but also other marginalized groups like disabled people and people of color. The use of derogatory terms is damaging and hurtful, and can lead to individuals choosing not to come out or to hide their queerness.

We have a long way to go regarding the legal rights of queer people in Iceland, and queer people are still a marginalized group. Recently, there’s been an increase in prejudiced comments and opinions which reflect ignorance and prove that people still close their eyes to their own privilege and others’ marginalization. Recent examples include the comments made by Iceland’s Deputy State Prosecutor regarding queer asylum seekers, and the Minister of Defense’s bill on immigrant laws which is in direct breach with many international agreements and fundamental human rights.

There should, can, and needs to be space for queer people in society. They need to be visible and prominent. By being visible we can serve as role models for those who don’t have the courage to come out yet, and it can be of great help to have someone you can confide in and seek support from. We need to be loud about our queerness, even though non-queer people protest it, until it’s not uncomfortable anymore. We are HERE. We are QUEER.

For you, non-queer reader: talk about queer people, queer art, queer culture, queer knowledge. Talk to the queer people around you and get to know more queer people. Learn to ask people which pronouns they prefer and practice them to make sure you know how to use them when you interact with non-binary people. Practice gender-neutral speech in general, so you can be more inclusive in conversation. Share queer voices and give them space. Use queer sources when working on a project, and include marginalized people in your school assignments. Be actively supportive by strengthening the presence of queer people, by providing opportunities in all aspects of society, and speak up when you encounter bigotry.

Board of Q–Queer Student Association Iceland