REVIEWS TORTURECAN BE FUN

encouraged a fairly tall woman to jump up nnd down on his chest repeatedly while he was lying on the shards.

At this point l began to rethink my apparent smartness. Kinda hurtl lo fake someone jumping up anti down on your chest lying on glass shards.

Out came Felicity Bouvier. clad in a Gstring and fishnets, she announced her intention to sit in the electric chair being rigged up stage right. At this point l was witness to some, unfortunately. standard macho insecurity when some of 1hemales in the audience felt it necessaryto point out, in their own special way, that Felicity did not have society's ideal body. So it was their duty to let others know how she was inadequate. Ignoring these assorted retards. l focussed back on the show. Felicity sat, bare skinned, on the electrically charged metal chair and lit light bulbs spraying sparks from her fingers. Cool. Molotov then assisted this performance by passing t1uorescent light bulbs around her electrified body making them glow. I wonder if someone could develop super powers if they charged themselves every day. Probably not.

Feats which followed included Zamora licking red-hot pokers, bending superheated metal bars with his feet, chewing n light bulb and then swallowing it, having four 200 pound audience members standing on his chest at the same time whilt: he was laying bareback on a bed of nails. swallowing a long string and then by using a scnlpcl and prongs 10 cut into his esophagus to pull the string out of his stomach, and lastly his grand finale.

To conclude his lessons in mind over pain and the various joys of self-torture. Zamora concluded with the weirdest act of all. Holding three skewers in his hands, he took one and pushed it completely through his right forearm. With his impaled right arm he pressed the next skewer through the centre of his left bicep muscle. The audience was lo ing it. Some people could not even watch. These rods did not pass through his arm very easily. He hutl to push, pull and wiggle the skewers so he could jam them through. He had one skewer left and 1 asked myself, "what will he stick that through?" Hii; reply came in the form of plunging the la~l rod down underneath his tongue and out the bottom of his chin. I could not help but gawk at this point. When pulling out these foreign objects from his muscles he had some trouble with the forearm skewer because it was tightening around the object... I never thought I woukl write a sentence like that.

As you can imagine. I had completely recanted my initial disbelief. All T could think intelligent things like, "oh my goodness, or holy crap. dude!" These feelings c.in be quite rare in our highly jaded and cynical culture. I, along with the audience, shared a tangible dumbfounded-ncss.

After the show I had a chance to talk to Zamora, the Torture King. I asked him. "what is your next big showstopper?" He explained that he has been studying the work of a Swiss performer who was around in the I 940's. This man was able to push a fencing sword through his back and out the front of his chest. He thinks he could do it. and I believe him.

the Iii torch, he sucked the name buc)<and then breathed it on to the nther torch.

Al this point I was skcptical. Hmmm .l wonder why? Fire is hot•• seems painful-he's not scrt:aming in unguish•• must he fake-- wow, I' n, smart!. Later on though. I would swullnw my skepticism whole, like Zamora swallowed those llaming torches.

Next was Molotov Bouvier. sword and blade allcionado. He brought out his rnck-oswords accompanied by the audience's subsequent delight. Picked up u medieval sword and before plunging it down his throat. he exclaimed, "I'm Molmov, anti I like to swallow." To top himself, he got someone from the crowd to come up on stage to pull the sword out of his throat as he bent over. Later he plunged two swords at a time down his neck.

It was Zamora the Torture King's turn agnin and he did not disappoint. He took a load of empty booze bottles from the bar and smashed them with a sledgehammer. Then he laid the resulting pile shards on the stuge. Barefoot, he lirst was "merely" standing on them, then he began 10 jump up and Jown on the splintered glass. Shedding his block shirt, he laid bareback on the glass. This, of course was not enough already. so he