The Black Sheep • a college newspaper that’s actually about college •
Volume 2, Issue 4 3/22/12 - 4/12/12
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Belle Isle, Hangovers and Train Hopper Saints Getting “out” of the city and into some trouble ben palmer wrote this Burn your Snuggies, folks. It’s that time of year again. You can hear it in the harsh chirp of rogue, fixie bike bells. You can see it in the awkward return of the v-neck (If you need to ask, it’s too deep). The sun is finally flourishing after countless weeks of moderately pissy weather, heralding the inebriated abomination that we mortals have respectfully named spring break. As always, it will come and go, leaving behind a trail of lost cell phones and blurred memories. But midriffs aren’t the only things that are revealing themselves. Spring is primed to explode, bringing with it an erotic palate of greens, purples and pinks. Hell, even the red, white n’ blue of Richmond’s city mascot, Pabst Blue Ribbon, will soon be adorning the front porch of every brownstone from the Fan to Forest Hill. And if the Mayan Long Count calendar is anything to be trusted, we’re about to begin the last spring of our lives. So why spend it locked up on campus, highlighting your days with Netflix marathons of The X-Files and late night visits to Coldstone? Put down that mellifluous monstrosity of cake batter ice cream. Which brings me to one of the more mystical locations in our great city: Belle Isle. This hidden gem lies right smack in the middle of the James River, accessible by a narrow footbridge or, for the more adventurous among us, an ill-advised and undoubtedly doomed quarter-mile breaststroke through some of the dirtiest shit-soup this side of the Mississippi. Sure, it was the location of a Civil War prison that witnessed the deaths of as many as 1,000 prisoners, and it’s even been the center of an assassination conspiracy involving the Battle of Walkerton. But have no fear, intrepid explorer, for Belle Isle is now the domain of train hoppers and geese. The Isle “closes” at dusk, but with the ghosts of Civil War soldiers rumored to stalk the grounds after dark, the police won’t be the only ones asking you to leave. Regardless, Belle Isle is more than old buildings and hungry waterfowl. The greatest experiences come from the people. In my escapades (that I actually remember) I’ve met a ‘60s era hippie holdover tossing rocks and debating marijuana law with a crowd of totally smacked hipsters. I have jammed out to acoustic Joy Division songs with train hoppers from Idaho. The only common theme to days on Belle Isle is there is no theme. You have to experience it in all its slipshod majesty, and now is the perfect time to do so, before the summer hits and the tiny isle is occupied
If you’re looking for a cheap date night free of saccharine chick flicks, make a trip down to the Canal Walk. Beginning on the corner of 14th and Dock Streets, within walking distance of the Hat Factory, the Canal Walk is a leisurely saunter through four centuries of Richmond history. It’s open 24/7/365, perfect for a sunset stroll with your significant other. Not only will you score major brownie points for a unique evening, but your wallet won’t have an aneurysm; and if you play all your cards right, these final wintry March sunsets can
they look so cool and in unison doing it. see page 5
Other stuff
Inside
by half the student body. Go ahead, round up a few of your friends and head over. Just head south on 5th Street, past the American Civil War Center, and you can’t miss it. It might look like a giant floating turd, but it’s got moxie in spades.
The Coming Out
lead to some serious temperatures in the bedroom. With midterms soon bearing down like Thor’s hammer on all chances of relaxation, now is the perfect time to crack one open and enjoy life. Get outside, walk to Carytown, join the LARP League (you’ll thank me later). In the words of the immortal Bukowski, “Your life is your life. Don’t let it be clubbed into dank submission.” There’s a whole city around you, brimming with amazing stories and countless escapades, waiting like a wallflower in the corner of the bar for you to make the first move. Buy her a drink; she’ll always show you a good time.
Where to go when the munchies are drunk dialing.
you never leave a fallen man behind, unless it’s for a taco.
see page 7
see page 12
Late Night Dining at VCU
The Partying Chronicles: There’s No I in Team