Vol.5, Issue 4
The Black Sheep The College Newspaper That's Actually About College
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10/17/13 - 10/30/13
Where’s Waldo of UD Campus BY: Carolyn Beatty There are certain people at UD that everyone gets exceptionally excited to see on campus. Each elicits a crazed flood of Facebook and Twitter updates to the tune of “like, omg… emotions” when spotted on campus. Finding one of these treasures makes one feel so powerful, it can be dangerous. Be careful when locating them. Their rarity is truly remarkable. They are the Where’s Waldos of UD, and they are beautiful.
President Harker:
The man, the myth, and the legend himself, President Harker makes the top of this list for many reasons. One reason being so few people know what he actually looks like. For those elite few who do know, there is an exceptional thrill of knowing you’re standing near the boss himself. Of course, a lot of this excitement stems from pretending that the real President Harker possesses the same persona as the parody Twitter account of “HarkSauce McBoss.” Either way, holding the door for him in Perkins and hearing him mutter a deep “thank you” may easily be one of your greatest moments at this university.
Techno Bus Driver:
The Techno Bus Driver may not warrant the same “exclusive” thrill as Harker because everyone knows what he looks like. Still, his impromptu appearances at dages and other events warrant the same extreme reactions as our fearless leader Prez Harker. It is so satisfying to see his bizarre technicolor dreamcoat, you can only desire to see his closet and be his best friend. It never gets old.
Miss Diana:
The only person (at least that we know of) named Dining Employee of the Year, Miss Diana is the absolute shit. She is not that hard to find, but her location deters many away: the Rodney Dining Hall. If you’ve avoided Rodney Dining Hall and its accurately described horrendous food, you’re missing out. Sure, you’re avoiding contracting some kind of virus, but you’re preventing yourself from seeing this sparkling beacon of hope every day. No matter what, Miss Diana is
page 4 Man Successfully Fakes Being in a Fake A Cappella Group Singin’ in the pain is rather aka-awkward.
always there to offer a smile, some friendly advice, or much-needed stories regarding her ever-changing weave. All UD students are always miserable, but for the precious few minutes that Miss Diana is in your life, the woes of the world tend to slip away.
Baby Blue:
Surprised that Baby Blue made the list and YoUDee didn’t? You shouldn’t be. YoUDee is known to appear at almost any universitysponsored function, thus eliminating the thrill of the unknown. Baby Blue on the other hand is the mistress of sass and shows up to what-
ever functions she damn well pleases. Basically, this mini-mascot is fabulous and everyone knows it. What other mascot would warrant its own hatching party for the entire student body, during which it ceremoniously broke through her papier-mache egg? Really. This was an actual event that people really attended. Thus, this little birdy wraps up the list of UD’s greatest Where’s Waldoesque figures with a z-snap and a peace sign. We hope the list expands, because everyone listed brings joy to any rainy Newark day.
pages 10-11 The Black Sheep Interviews: Steve-O We chat with the infamous funny man about nut shots and YouTube.
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page 15 Student who put up hammock, smartest on campus UD’s genius was identified as guy who hung around on a hammock all day.