Vol. 2, Issue 5
The Black Sheep The College Newspaper That's Actually About College
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9/26/13 - 10/2/13
John Calipari’s
Resignation Letter BY: Quinn Schwartz
Dear BBN, It’s been four amazing years since you put your faith in me and invited me into Rupp Arena, the mecca of college basketball, to be your coach and turn around a program that was headed in the wrong direction. We surpassed the 2,000 win mark, hung a championship banner, and packed our arena with over four times as many fans as opposing teams had enrolled in their entire student body. Just this week, Rupp was stuffed to the brim with a sea of blue for a scrimmage in the middle of September that meant absolutely nothing. I’ve said it before and I will say it again: you people are crazy. But I’m crazy too. Crazy for the bright lights and the big city. This is why I have decided to forgo the rest of my contract with the University of Kentucky and pursue my lifelong dream of becoming a member of the Chippendales dance troupe. When I was a boy I thought I wanted to be a famous basketball coach one day, but I can remember the exact moment I realized my true destiny was on stage expressing myself in the only way I know how… dance. I was twelve years old and I was returning home from a friend’s house after watching a legendary performance by Wilt Chamberlain in the NBA finals. It was a late summer night and the only sound on the street was the soft patter of my high top Converse sneakers on the pavement. Halfway home I stopped in front of a closed thrift store to check my reflection in the front
window and apply a bit of pomade to my thick black tress. I had the best hair on the block. As I turned to continue home I was surprised to see a chunky white bus with the name “Chippendales” scrawled in black cursive lettering on the side. I watched the bus as it slowed to a stop on the side of the road next to me. I took a step back as a tall musclebound figure stepped onto the sidewalk. I don’t know if it was his long flowing mane, perfect tuft of chest hair under his neatly tied bowtie, or if it was simply the way the moonlight glowed radiantly off of his black leather chaps. Whatever it was, I was hooked and I knew I had to be one of them. “Know where we can get a decent bite to eat at this hour?” he asked me. His presence intimidated me and I was at a loss for words. I looked down at my sneakers and pointed down the road. “Three miles,” I said. I had so many questions, but this one phrase was all I could muster. I turned and walked back in the direction of my house, cursing myself for not saying something, anything that would let them know how much their unexpected manifestation had inspired me. “Hey kid!” one of them called out. I turned around just in time to see another member of the troupe lean out
one of the bus windows and remove his bowtie. He tossed it to me and I caught it in a clenched fist above my head. I could still feel the sweat on the black silk from their performance earlier that night. “Never give up on your dreams,” he said to me as the engine roared to life and the bus puttered back down the empty street from whence it came. I never forgot those words, BBN. From that day on all I wanted to do in this life was be a member of the Chippendales dance troupe, but I knew my father would never understand. It wasn’t until I came to Kentucky
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and felt the love and support that everyone here has for me that I knew it was time to finally fulfill my life’s ambition. My blood family might never understand, but I know that my Wildcat family will always be there for me no matter what I decide to do. This is why I will make Kentucky proud with every swing of my hips and every pelvic thrust from this day until the day I die. Thank you, Lexington, and remember, never give up on your dreams. No matter what. With love and respect, John Calipari
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We Interview: Flux Pavilion Our chat with the English DJ-slashproducer.