Minnesota Fall Issue 12 - 11/29/12

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The Black Sheep FR

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Lik Tw e y itt ou er r o ac ver co -b un lo t. ate

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• a college newspaper that’s actually about college •

theblacksheeponline.com @blacksheep_umn

Volume 3, Issue 12 11/29/12 - 12/5/12

Five Ways You've Accidentally Become a Social Media Hypocrite Katrina Nicholson wrote this

Everyone can relate to that awkward moment upon realizing they are committing an act they had just made fun of someone else for doing two weeks prior. With the rapid increase in social networking sites, we've all fallen victim to ridiculed behaviors. You said you'd never be a part of it, but look at you now, you conformist piece of shit. Current event Facebook statuses: Usually Facebook is the first place we hear about a national catastrophe or significant event. But most of that information will come from biased Facebook statuses, links or useless banter. We all pretend to hate this, some people will even proclaim it with the standard sarcastic comment like: “Wow, did Obama win the election?” You'll say you're annoyed, but a week later when some politician sends out pictures of his flabby again you won't be able to resist posting your own clever quip. It'll get you so many likes! That’s what really matters! Seeking validation with Facebook likes: On a similar note, if we post something that receives no attention, we inevitably feel like shit. Some people are even strategic about it, for example “I waited until the election was over to post my status about going abroad, because otherwise no one would notice it.” Yeah, you're maybe sitting there laughing at the ridiculousness of it, but don't lie. You've timed your jokes, your snippets of life. You've also been personally offended that only two people liked your new profile picture: your mom and your aunt – and rightfully so. Because that means you're a social networking failure. And a social networking failure makes you a failure at life. Using your iPhone to take selfies: Selfies are for MySpace right? Posting one makes you a prick, right? Hmm, well that doesn't explain the sudden frequency of “sarcastic” selfie pictures popping up everywhere. That frontal camera is there for a reason... So people might as well use it to the full extent, right? It's not your fault that sometimes you look really good and there's no one there to take a picture of you, right?

Guide to Late Eating in Dinkytown

Tweeting in general: Tweeting is the equivalent of posting frequent Facebook statuses. When we tell people we have a Twitter they generally say the same thing, “You have a Twitter? Wow if I had a Twitter no one would follow me.” When people say that they're really saying, “Why do you have a Twitter? No one cares what you have to say.” Well eventually we all start to think people care what we have to say, and we start tweeting incessantly. It's a fact of life. #poop Uploading pictures of your food: Whether it's on Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook, we all make fun of the people who upload pictures of their food. But after a while of being exposed to other people doing it, it starts to seem

what’s inside

completely acceptable. You'll sit down at a nice restaurant, your food will arrive, it will be beautifully prepared, and you'll catch yourself whipping out your phone. You'll take that picture of that sexy piece of French toast. You'll hate yourself for it but you'll upload it. And for some reason it just seems okay now. (Go ahead and upload that tall glass of chocolate milk #nofiler.) Phew, what a load to get off our chests. What with the invasive lifestyles we partake in, it feels difficult to just have a moment of honesty, something true, something real. How profound. God, someone better like this on Facebook, share it on Twitter, and post a selfie of them reading it on Instagram... OR ELSE I'LL KILL MYSELF!

Top Ten Things Not to Do in a College Bathroom

The Black Sheep Christmas Wishlist

Dinkytown rules, but your shrinking wallet doesn’t.

Having sex in a public bathroom stall is inappropriate behavior. Oh, you already knew that?

You, like, really like us (well, at least pretend to).

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