Volume 4
The Black Sheep
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Issue 4
PURDUE SHACKERS:
ALL ABOARD THE HOT MESS EXPRESS Maddie Beyrouty wrote this
BOOM! It suddenly hits you that the bed you’re lying in isn’t yours, you’re confused about where you are, and you have to remember what this person’s name is lying next to you before they wake up. Are you up in Tower Acres? Are you over by Chauncey? Or did you end up on the other side of campus in McCutcheon? More importantly, you should find your pants. Next time you’re thinking about shacking, here are some tips about how NOT to shack. Don’t Wait to Leave: Wake up and leave. If you haven’t figured out what happened the night before, you don’t want to hear it at all. Whether you’re at one of the fraternities, the green door apartments, Chauncey, or Owen Hall, wake up find your clothes and your dignity and get out. Leaving later than noon is a dangerous thing. You’re risking the chance of running into friends that are still wondering where you went last night, or even worse, the crowd of churchgoers leaving the Christian Campus House on Sunday. The earlier you get your butt up and leave, the less risk you have of making that awkward encounter. Don’t Be a Repeat Offender: Don’t be that person who starts shacking over and over again. When their roommates stop you in the Memorial Union telling you how you look familiar, that’s a sign it’s time to stop drunkenly wandering back to the same place every time you decide to go out. The point of shacking is to keep your visit on the down-low. When you start to get pointed out and you can’t hide your identity any longer, don’t ever go back. Don’t Make Another Pitstop: After the night you’ve had, it’s in yours and everyone else’s best interest that the first thing you do is to go back home and take a shower. Don’t subject yourself to the dirty looks you’re going to get when you decide to stop and get a bite to eat at Triple XXX, or HotBox. Go straight home, get your life together again and go on with your day. Go to the Wabash Landing to watch
a movie, go over to Hicks and do something productive, LIKE STUDY. Or go back to Harry’s Chocolate Shop for round two. Nobody needs to smell the lingering McCormick’s you’re still sweating off. Don’t Get Creepy: Don’t look for a proposal. If you expect to base a relationship off of a drunken night of shacking, your issues run deeper than you think. If you make the mistake of hanging around the morning after and want to engage in awkward small talk, keep it cool and keep it casual. If you’re all the way by AJ’s Burgers and you
need to get back to Wiley, it’s not out of the question to ask for a ride home, it’s the least they can do. There’s nothing worse than waking up to a crazy person (whose name you may or may not remember) wanting to talk about what you’re going to name your future children. Purdue knows how to point out the shackers and students love to talk about it. If you don’t like to be the topic of conversation after a wild night around the town, whether you’re going to Harry’s Chocolate Shop, or frat hopping, you should probably transfer, we love to gossip and we take no prisoners.
PAGE 4
PAGE 5
PAGES 12-13
MOVIES ABOUT COLLEGE: RIGHT AND WRONG
TOP 10: CLASSES TO TAKE YOUR SENIOR YEAR
WE INVESTIGATE: HOW NAKED IS TINDER, ACTUALLY?
WE CRITIQUE EVERYTHING EVERYTHING FROM ACCEPTED TO MONSTERS UNIVERSITY
DON’T REGISTER BEFORE READING THIS GUIDE TO MAKING YOUR LIFE SCHEDULE AWESOME.
WE CREATED A FAKE ACCOUNT AND TRIED GETTING SOME NUDES...THE RESULTS WERE TERRIFYING.
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FEBRUARY 26TH, 2015 - MARCH 11TH, 2015
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PAGE THREE THE BLACK SHEEP’S LEGENDARY
WORD OF THE WEEK
80s CARTOON CHARACTER PORN STAR NAME?
ONLYFACE The opposite of a butterface, this is a person whose only redeeming quality is their face.
FEMME APPEAL
Have you seen Joseph? His facial structure is flawless! But his body looks like a pale, quivering mass of mashed potatoes. He’s such an onlyface.
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MOVIES ABOUT COLLEGE: RIGHT VS. WRONG TBS STAFF wrote this
There’s an idea of college that movies typically reinforce: the partying, drinking, baddecisions, but oh-so-fun time of your life. It isn’t until you get to college that you realize what those movies actually got right.
to show the intense studying one does right before a test, as they dust off their book for the first time.
Accepted (2006): Correct: SHIT happens. Whether you were rejected from every other college but your safety school; failed the first, second, or third round of tests; lied about your grades to your parents; can’t remember last night after partying too hard, or do remember; SHIT happens. Incorrect: College is more like West Harmon than South Harmon, more structure with parties on the side. It’s not a wonderland of fake classes that you can argue have some educational merit, well, unless you’re in CLA.
The Social Network (2010): Correct: If you need those prelab questions that are due by midnight or maybe some help with your lab report, there are plenty of students that are willing to collaborate to get it done. You just need to watch out for those Zuckerbergs that may take those strokes of genius, copyright them as their own, and turn them into a billion-dollar idea. Incorrect: Don’t expect to spend only a year at college, have a stroke of genius, and drop out on a billion-dollar idea. We don’t have that genius to fall back on, and some of don’t even have basic reasoning skills to start with and need all the help we can get.
National Lampoon’s Van Wilder (2002): Correct: No day is off limits from partying, which can be difficult when you need to get up for your 3:35 physics class with a hangover. Incorrect: Then again, there isn’t nearly as much time for partying, as the movie seems to depict. While Van manages to study for all of his classes in just minutes courtesy of an intense movie montage, the movie forgets
Monsters University (2013): Correct: There are two kinds of people at college: the smart kids and the slackers. The smart kids need look out the window every day just to get some vitamin D since they don’t go outside, and their biggest social interaction is their online study group. The slacker seems to think the weekends come around twice a week, and they party so hard that they wake up at five in the afternoon
after their classes, roll over in bed, and say they’ll try again tomorrow. Incorrect: Failing tests and disregarding rules isn’t just going to pay off in the end. There is literally no way you’re going to get away with the same things Sulley and Mike did like cheating, breaking and entering, going on the run, and only getting expelled. Maybe the first time you were lucky, maybe the second time you should buy a lottery
ticket, but the third time you should wake up. College-themed movies aren’t that far off in their portrayals of college life. Sure, they tend to lean toward more idealistic visions and seem to forget about studying or homework, but hey, that’s something college students do as well, right?
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THE TOP TEN
Classes to Take Your Senior Year Registration is upon us. If you’re looking to just cruise through your senior year with no trouble at all (and no classes on Fridays), listen up. Below are the top 10 classes you should take in order to have the easiest senior year known to man.
MOVIE STUDENTS GET TURNED ON BY OLD TECH-SAVVY PROFESSOR STAFF wrote this
Students of all genders and sexual orientations go crazy in love for a professor who seamlessly integrates technology with his class lectures, reports suggest. All students in Dr. Alfred Waberg’s ANTH310 class seem to fall in lust for this old man on the brink of retirement. Apparently, the attraction is solely due to the fact that Dr. Waberg can properly use a computer. With so much power, The Black Sheep decided to investigate what really happens in ANTH310. When the clock struck 12:20 p.m., Dr. Waberg strode to the front of the room, gracefully plugged in his VGA cord into his MacBook Air, and began his power point presentation. A student turned to the girl next to her and whispered, “The red pepper on Rate My Professors doesn’t do him justice. Waberg is at least a white ghost pepper.” His presentation was filled with custom-made graphics, complementary typefaces, and more that could make any public speaker without basic computer skills green with envy. Another student near this reporter whispered to his friends, “My last class got canceled for the rest of the semester because my professor didn’t know how to turn on the lights!” “But this guy sure knows how to turn on my lights,” another replied. When a slide presented an embedded YouTube video—such that copy/pasting a link wasn’t required—an audible gasp rippled across the room. A student in Lambda Chi whimpered, “Oh my god,” while tears of joy streamed down his face. The Black Sheep noticed that many girls flipped their hair and leaned their chests forward a bit as Dr. Waberg passed their desks. Many of the male students began licking their lower lips and bashfully looked down and to the right.
At one point, when Dr. Waberg showed a video in full screen but also managed to hide the cursor, small moans could be heard sporadically around the room. Some students even excused themselves to the bathroom. With a click of a button, the lights gradually turned back on, the window shades rose, Dr. Waberg turned off the projector, and class was dismissed. As students filed out of the room, The Black Sheep tried to get more input from Dr. Waberg’s students. Sophomore Lexie Crisp recounted her experience: “I purposely failed this class last semester just so I could have Dr. Waberg again. Last year, I flashed Waberg after class when I saw that he, unlike other professors, uses Google Chrome.” It’s not only the girls who fawn over this old man. Brady Young came to us saying, “Dr. Waberg is easily the most beautiful human specimen on this planet. I’ve never seen a professor of his age be able to use technology like that. I’m going to delete my Tinder account because he is my match.” The Black Sheep was also able to obtain a letter a fellow professor sent to the Dean of Anthropology: “The students in this class are salivating over this professor and that is a disgrace. Purdue is a beacon of learning – NOT of ogling old men. Sure, I still don’t know how Wi-Fi works or how to download music, but just because Alfred Waberg does, doesn’t mean that Purdue students should be going crazy for this man. That just makes it so much harder for me to get with him.” When The Black Sheep asked Dr. Waberg for a comment, he shrugged his shoulders, took the last sip of his Darjeeling tea, and rode away on his vintage cruiser bicycle.
10.) PHPR 489: Complementary and Alternative Medicine, 1 credit: Don’t let the 400-level or the pharmacy label scare you off—the roughest part of the course is the weekly reflection, each worth 10 points— no exams. This class is perfect to convince your parents that you’re actually doing something resourceful with your time. You don’t even have to be a pharmacy major to enroll, and it only meets once a week! 9.) MUS 250: Music Appreciation, 3 credits: The clincher for this course is that you can take it as a distance learning class. You don’t even have to leave your dorm room or apartment (or the bar) to ace this class. There are quizzes and exams, but all information is drawn straight from the readings which you can copy and paste into a Word document as your “notes” and voila, perfect score on every quiz. 8.) COM 212: Approaches to the Study of Interpersonal Communication, 3 credits: As long as you aren’t socially awkward and have some common sense when it comes to talking to people, this online class will be a breeze. 7.) PES 115: Bowling, 1 credit: There are a variety of different choices under this course code, but bowling is by far the most popular. *BONUS* you can have Pappy’s delivered right to your lane. Those are the perks of having class in the Union. 6.) ANTH 205: Human Cultural Diversity, 3 credits: While attendance is required, the material isn’t hard. Full study guides are provided for the exams, and chances are you’ll be sitting next to someone who actually majors in anthropology, so finding someone to mooch off of study with should be no problem. 5.) CLCS 237: Gender and Sexuality in Greek and Roman Antiquity, 3 credits: Did you really go to college if you didn’t take a class on sexuality? 4.) EAPS 111: Physical Geology, 3 credits: Once again, this class is sure to fly with your parents since it’s an about actual scientific material, not just flower arranging or wine tasting (both of which are offered at Purdue, but either cost extra money or are actually kind of difficult). 3.) HIST 152: United States since 1877, 3 credits: There are a lot of quizzes in this class, but you can opt to take it online. Plus, it’s all about material that you’ve been learning since elementary school. The North won the Civil War, the Nazis lose, and Obama was the first black president. Aced. 2.) OLS 252: Human Relations in Organizations, 3 credits: We’ve all heard the deal about OLS classes. They’re mostly filled with people looking for an easy A, or student athletes (wait, isn’t that the same thing?). 1.) Literally GS Anything: General studies classes don’t fulfill any requirement for graduation besides just being time-fillers. The great things about these classes is that most of the time, all you have to do is show up. Katy Martin wrote this
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ON THE STREETS WHAT’S SOMETHING YOU’RE ONLY A LITTLE EMBARRASSED TO ADMIT YOU DON’T KNOW HOW TO DO? ANAVI N.
“I don’t know how to change a tire! What if I need to do it, I’m gonna have to ask some random person. So awkward!”
BETHANY W.
“I can’t do a cartwheel. I can’t whistle either.”
LAUREN D.
“I can’t properly take a shot. I hold it in my mouth too long and it burns!”
06
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MEXICAN GRILL & BAR
Bar Open Late Every Night! Catering Now Available! DAILY FOOD & DRINK SPECIALS: CHECK THE BAR GRID!
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THE BAR GRID SPECIAL NIGHT
TUESDAY: $2 Double Wells $2 Any Draft $2 Hot Shot of the Day $5 3 Olives Long Islands*
Everyday: $0.69 Bud Light $0.99 Shocktop $1.20 Johnny Appleseed $1.99 Peoples Drafts
FRIDAY! $3 Any Well Drink $3 Shots, $4 Bombs $12 Well Pitcher 5 for $15 International Beers
Thursday
$1.50 Double Well Mixers $1 Sharkbite Shots $1 Wounded Turtle Shots $2.50 Domestic Drafts $2.00 Fireball Shots
$10.99 Steak Night! $0.69 Bud Light $0.99 Shocktop $1.20 Johnny Appleseed $1.99 Peoples Drafts
5 for $15 Corona, Heineken and Dos Equis $12 Margarita and Mojito Pitchers, $2 Tequila Shots $4.25 Long Islands
Friday
$5 Double 3 Olives Mixers $5 Double Wells $5 Premium Flavored Long Islands $13 Boneless Wings & Bud/Coors Light Towers 2-9pm
$0.69 Bud Light $0.99 Shocktop $1.20 Johnny Appleseed $1.99 Peoples Drafts
$3 Any Well Drink $3 Shots, $4 Bombs $12 Well Pitcher 5 for $15 International Beers
Saturday
$5 Double Bacardi $5 Double Wells $5 Premium Flavored Long Islands
$0.69 Bud Light $0.99 Shocktop $1.20 Johnny Appleseed $1.99 Peoples Drafts
$4.25 Long Islands $3 Shots, $4 Bombs 5 for $12 Domestics $12 Well Pitchers
Sunday
$2 Double Wells $3 U-Call-It Shots $5 Double U-Call-It Mixers $5 3 Olives Long Islands
$0.69 Bud Light $0.99 Shocktop $1.20 Johnny Appleseed $1.99 Peoples Drafts
Open - 6pm, Hooka Freefill (With purchase of an appetizer) $0.50 Wings (Minimum of 6) $2 Domestic Beers $3 Import Beers $4.25 Margaritas and Mojitos
Monday
50¢ Rolling Rock Cans $1 Double Wells $1.25 18oz Bud Light Bottles* $3 U Call It Shots $5 3 Olives Long Islands*
$0.69 Bud Light $0.99 Shocktop $1.20 Johnny Appleseed $1.99 Peoples Drafts
$.50 Wings (Minimum of 6) $3.25 Any Well Drink 5 for $5 Bud Light, Miller Lite, and Coors Light
Tuesday
$2 Double Wells $2 Any Draft $2 Hot Shot of the Day $5 3 Olives Long Islands*
$0.69 Bud Light $0.99 Shocktop $1.20 Johnny Appleseed $1.99 Peoples Drafts
5 for $12 Domestic Beers $10 Sangria Pitcher $4 Redbull Vodkas 6pm – Close, Hooka Freefill (With purchase of an appetizer, one per appetizer)
Wednesday
Wing Night (Mild, Ass-Burner, Spicy Garlic & Hawaiian BBQ) 25¢ Wings 9pm ‘til gone $1.25 Miller High Life bottles $1.50 double wells $2 Hot Shot of the Day $5 3 Olives Long Islands*
$0.69 Bud Light $0.99 Shocktop $1.20 Johnny Appleseed $1.99 Peoples Drafts
$3.25 Any Well Drink, $2 Domestic Beers & $3 Import Beers $4.25 Daiquiris and Pina Coladas $12 Well Pitchers 6pm – Close, Half off Second Hooka (Limit one per table)
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THE BAR GRID TUESDAY! Euchre at 9pm $1 Off All Crafts & Microbrews, $2.50 Bacardi and Bacardi Oakheart
FRIDAY & SATURDAY: Bruce in the Piano Bar 9pm, Live DJ main room
FRIDAY & SATURDAY: $3.99 32oz Domestic Drafts
SPECIAL NIGHT
Free Hotdogs, Popcorn and Peanuts $2.25 Domestic Bottles, $4.25 Fishbowls, Well Drinks
THREE DOLLAR THREE OLIVES THURSDAY $1 Coors, $2 Wells and $3 Three Olives $3.75 Long Islands
$3.99 Cactus Margaritas
Thursday
$3.75 Captain Morgan, $3.25 Miller/Coors 24oz Drafts, $4.25 Blue Moon 24oz Drafts $3 Bazooka Joe & Cherry Bombs, Free Hotdogs, Popcorn and Peanuts!
$2 Bud/Bud Light Drafts, $15 100oz beer tubes, $12 Bud/Bud Light buckets, $3 Titos, $4 Jacks and $4 Bacardi Bruce in Piano Bar 9pm, Live DJs main room
$3.99 32oz Domestic Drafts
Friday
Brex Club! $4.25 Jack Daniels, $3.25 Bud, Bud Light and Rolling Rock 24oz Drafts, $4.25 Goose Island 312 24oz Drafts, $3 Jager Bombs | Breakfast Club Specials: $2.25 Screwdrivers and Bloody Marys, $3 Fireball Breakfast Shots
$3.50 Smirnoff and Captain Morgan, $4 Jacks, $12 Buckets Miller/ Coors, $15 100oz Beer Tube of Miller/Coors Bruce in the Piano Bar 9pm, Live DJ main room
$3.99 32oz Domestic Drafts
Saturday
$15 Domestic Pitcher & Pie, $6.50 Domestic Pitchers, $2.25 Wells, $3 Fireball
Check out your pics on our galleries @ neoncactus.biz
$15.99 House Margarita Pitchers
Sunday
$1.50 Bud/Bud Light Bottles, $2 Coronas, $3 Jager Bomb Cups, $15 Domestic Pitcher + Pie, $4 220z Well Drinks, $5 Red Bull Mixers
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Margarita Monday! $2.99 12oz Margaritas
Monday
Euchre at 9pm $1 Off All Crafts & Microbrews, $2.50 Bacardi and Bacardi Oakheart
Check out your pics on our galleries @ neoncactus.biz
$1.99 16oz Domestic Drafts
Tuesday
Team Trivia at 9:30pm $2.25 Wells, $1.50 Retro Miller Lite Bottles
RESERVE TABLES, PRIVATE PARTIES and MORE! Go to neoncactus.biz and CONTACT US to send a message to make your night even more special!
$2.25 16oz Import Drafts
Wednesday
BARTENDER OF THE WEEK Relationship Status: Single Major: Marketing Favorite Drink: Margarita Favorite Shot: Scooby Snack Disgusting Drink: Four Horsemen A person who orders a martini in a college bar is…: Bougie. Five words to describe your best night bartending at Neon Cactus: I’m just here so I won’t get fined. What supervillain do you most relate to?: Reptar, because I used to have a mohawk and good looks.
JOHN T. AT NEON CACTUS
Is there a food everyone likes that you hate? Why?: Pudding, bad memories from bar-backing.
What backhanded compliment most accurately describes you?: People sometimes ask if I’m gay, but it’s just my style and I like to smile a lot. What’s the most unlikely thing you have in your purse/pocket/ backpack right now?: A trench knife. Why should people read The Black Sheep?: I always get a laugh out of it, and laughing is good for the soul.
THE DRINKING GAME
RECIPE FOR DISASTER
BELOW ZERO BOOZE
SAUCED-UP STIR FRY
Mother Nature has presented us with frigid weather that nobody wants to go outside in. The only thing that could possibly keep you warm is your super-thick alcohol blanket, so let’s go grab it. What You ‘ll Need: A lot of alcohol, probably a space heater to stay warm while you wait for it to kick in. Number of Players: You and anybody else who is also frozen, which is probably the entire campus. Level of Intoxication: Enough to go numb so you don’t have to face the cold. How to Play: - Take a drink every time the temperature drops. - Take a drink for each layer you put on. - Take a drink if you’re not wearing boots or a hat. - Take a drink if someone tells you “It’s actually not that cold,” BUT IT IS. - Take a drink if you’re even thinking about leaving your apartment (trust us, you’ll need it). - Finish your drink if your hands turn blue when you go outside. The Game Ends When: You can walk outside in less than three layers and your boogers don’t freeze across your face.
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Nothing like a good mix of meat and vegetables to prep that hawt spring break bod. Not to mention, we all know your mom would be proud of you for purchasing your first vegetables of the year. This simple recipe is good for even the amateurs in the kitchen. What You’ll Need: Some chicken, and whatever vegetables you can find, a skillet. Fatty Factor: The GOOD Anna Nicole Smith. Cook Time: Have you even been to a P.F. Chang’s? Let’s Get Baked: - Dice up the chicken and throw it in the skillet. - Once you run no risk of getting salmonella from the meat, throw those vegetables in. If you don’t have real vegetables like your mother would want you to, even potatoes or something similar works. - Stir the contents of the pan to make sure you don’t burn your masterpiece. - Add some sauce (please, anything but ketchup), and you’re done! Serve over rice (which, you know, you should steam first.) -Bonus points if you top it off with a fortune cookie you stole from the janky joint down the street. Now that you’re loaded up on protein and not the typical saturated fat and carbs, give your parents a call and let them know how you’re doing. Cue them in on your new healthy lifestyle choices to make up for that huge pizza you downed last night at 3 a.m.
NOMNOMNOM AT THEBLACKSHEEPONLINE.COM
HOW NAKED IS TINDER, ACTUALLY? The Black Sheep consider ourselves members of the prestigious elite of credible, notable “can be found on the internet” sources of the latest goings on. So we thought it was about time that we jump into the investigation pool with a look at Tinder. What better way to investigate the app that’s been blocked by high schools across the country than by doing a good old-fashioned high school science experiment.
MOLLY ADE WROTE THIS
Procedure: When it came time to do all of the swiping, we stuck to a consistent left/ right/left/right pattern. We split our “subjects” into three groups based on how we would message them. Group 1: We made no mentions of nudes at all. We carried on the conversation long enough to give the lucky fellas a chance to bring up nudes themselves.
Introduction: Tinder fucking sucks. Or at least that’s what it seems from a quick Google on the internet machine. It’s commonly thought that the only people on Group 2: We went with a blatant rejection of nudes that was completely Tinder are horny college kids desperate for anything close to a naked unprovoked. picture; but is that actually true? Group 3: We offered up nudes, again unprovoked. Hypothesis: If we create a fake Tinder account and message guys from around the Observations: country, then we will be asked for nudes (and be sent nudes). We ended up with a lot fewer requests for nudes than we expected. Materials: We also ended up in what seemed • 1 cellular phone like a never-ending sea of conver• 1 fake Facebook account sations with winners of the should• 1 Tinder account be hit TV show Are You the Weird• 1 moderately-to-well-above-average-attractive-looking stock photo est Man in America? We can’t make • 1 writer stupid brave enough to put themselves in the line of fire dick this generalization about everyone, pics though, and some of our groups were better than others. Meet Emma Blackman, a 22-year-old student at the University of Michigan, working as a research student. Emma is pretty, but not in an intimidating way that would make guys afraid to message her. In her free time, Emma likes to dance, be outdoors, and study communications. Though you wouldn’t be able to tell that from her Tinder profile because we thought we added a bio, but forgot. Though Emma is really a stock photo, we’d like to think that if she were real, she’d approve of our experiment.
Group 1: So How About That Group 2: Just Because I Said Weather? Hello Does Not Mean I’m Group 1, we applaud you. Yes, you had Showing You My Tits your fair share of weirdos, and there were a lot, but for the most part, you didn’t horrify us. A typical Group 1 conversation looked like this.
Group 2, you surprised us even more than Group 1, though we still wouldn’t want to bring any of you home to mama. You responded as we’d hope any remotely sane person would when spontaneously verbally assaulted for “expecting” nudes.
Part of us did take it personally that guys didn’t jump on the offer for “no strings attached” nudes because, come on, look at us! But hell, we’d trade that for this guy any day. We’re still not sure if we should admire how persistent he was, or be a little disturbed… We’re leaning towards “whoa, chill out dude, they’re just nudes.”
Summary: Tinder proved itself to be less skeezy than we thought it would be. However, you may have noticed that we’re still sticking to the claim that Tinder seriously sucks. Why? No matter what approach we used, there was always one thing in common: these guys used the weirdest fucking pickup lines.
Look boring? It was. Nothing against them, but none of these guys put themselves out there. We could have continued this conversation for another three weeks without even a single sexual innuendo. We’re honestly not sure they even know that sex isn’t a mythical creature conjured up by that chubby kid in their 2nd grade gym class. Except this guy.
To his credit, he did quickly take nudes off the table. He also messaged a total stranger to ask if she’d be into a threesome. We have so many more questions for this guy, but that wasn’t the experiment.
If Glen Coco gets four candy canes, this guy deserves five.
Whether it’s their ability to hide behind a phone screen or just their pure stupidity, we can easily conclude why none of us use Tinder for dating. Regardless of which group these Prince Charmings belonged to, they all left us with the same questions: “How did you come up with that?” “Has that worked on anyone before?” The only question they didn’t leave us wondering was, “How are you still single?”
Group 3: You Get A Nude! You Get A Nude! Everybody Gets A Nude! We expected every guy to take advantage of a chance for free bewbiez right off the bat. And although that didn’t happen, we were genuinely happy we didn’t have to explain ourselves out of that situation too often.
Conclusion: We are never using Tinder again.
THE SEEK-N-FIND
Can you find all 8 hidden sheep? If so, email us at seek@theblacksheeponline.com and you’ll win a prize!
FAMOUS JENS CROSSWORD ACROSS: 3) This American Idol-winning Jennifer was born in Chicago. 6) This Jennifer was one of the stars on the late-90s sitcom Dharma & Greg. 7) Ben Affleck is married to this Jennifer. 9) This Jenna has over 14 million YouTube subscribers, the most by any woman. 10) Jenny Lewis is the lead singer of this band, two words. 14) Jennifer Lawrence plays this role in The Hunger Games series, two words. 15) Jennifer Coolidge played who’s mom in American Pie? 16) Jennifer Lopez became a household name after playing this famous pop star. 17) Jennifer Carpenter had a prominent role in this popular Showtime series. DOWN: 1) This Jennifer won an Academy Award and a Golden Globe for her supporting role in A Beautiful Mind. 2) This Jennifer is both an actress and successful poker player. 4) This friendly Jennifer is regularly regarded as one of the most beautiful actresses. 5) This Jennifer is famous for her roles in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and Dirty Dancing. 8) This Jenna is most notable for her adult-entertainment performances. 11) This Jennifer definitely knows what you did last summer, two words. 12) Jenna Bush Hager is a special correspondent for this tv show, two words. 13) Jenny McCarthy has a strong stance against what?
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