Vol. 5, Issue 9
The Black Sheep The College Newspaper That's Actually About College
No free fli ...li ght ke s to DEATH Fra nce ! , ok ?
10/24/13 - 10/30/13
Places at VCU (we Think) Are Haunted BY: Sabrina Fuller Everyone’s heard rumors on campus about certain local hot spots being haunted. From GRC to MCV, there’s a rich history of spooky spirits at VCU, so The Black Sheep has compiled a few under-the-radar locations for you to check out. Some places on the list may surprise you, some not, since you may be the ones who killed and buried people there. JuSt KidDiNg!~!
Cabell Basement
The “HelpIT” IT desk is run by legitimate zombies with glazed expressions, hands constantly scrolling through the computer and a propensity to sit in the cold, dark basement all day. Their brains stopped making neural connections a long time ago. Make sure they don’t bite you if you approach them with a question, lest you get zombified. Hey - if you do, at least you’ll have a solid job. If you make it past the IT desk you may encounter another scary sight: the ghosts of rejected VCU professors. They haunt the Cabell basement constantly. They teach 3-hour-long classes once a week in forgotten basement classrooms, making students read and write essays on research that never made it into scholarly journals. Nightmare, much?
Shafer Dining Bathroom
Rumor has it that if you say “Fried Chicken Mondays” in the restroom mirror three times, a worker’s ghost will cackle in your ear. We dare you to go try it the next time you’re in Shafer. Also make sure you listen out for the moans and groans of the spirit who went back for seconds. It will give you chills, if you aren’t getting them from the food already. Some serious disasters have gone down in this wretched place, so don’t stay long unless you have to.
Barnes and Noble
Not too many people know about the B&N Banshee. Her soul wails away in the textbook section. Moaning Myrtle has nothing on this girl. If you happen to be around, you might hear her scream “$600 for textbooks?! Whyyyyy!!!” Before you judge her, you should know she died as a freshman. No one told her about Amazon or book torrents. Take pity on this tortured soul. As you browse aisles of books you might start to
hear her whisper things like “you’re going to fail Bio” or “you’re down to ten swipes, you’re going to starve to death,” but do your best to ignore her negative energy.
Cary Street Parking Deck
Remember that movie Christine? Yeah. Only someone in a creepy relationship with their car would pay VCU’s parking fees. There are all kinds of lore about jealous sedans running over new girlfriends in this very parking lot. Think back for a moment… remember that time you could have sworn you parked your car on the second level but it somehow ended up on the first level? Kind of eerie isn’t it?
There are car alarms that spontaneously go off at odd hours of the night, the elevator stops abruptly and in a creepy manner, and sometimes you think you see someone behind you, but when you turn around no one’s there. All of this evidence can be traced back to the Cary Street parking deck being haunted. So just in case you weren’t paranoid enough about stab happy thugs, you now have to watch out for evil spirits blowing curses up your ass. Hey, we don’t make this stuff up, we’re just telling you to watch your back.
page 5
page 6
pages 10-11
Destroy townie Freshman At Your Halloween Party
The Compass’ Halloween Spooky Spectacles
The Black Sheep Interviews: Steve-O
Can’t have teenybopping if cops come a-knocking.
Pranks will be pulled. Screw the innocent.
We chat with the infamous funny man about nut shots and Youtube.
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