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Volume 3, Issue 4 | 10/13/11 - 10/27/11 | theblacksheeponline.com
The
Black Sheep
“A College Newspaper That’s Actually About College”
how to not be "that" roommate Hannah Weyer wrote this From time to time do you ever find yourself questioning your roommate situation? Let’s be honest, throughout your four years (or more…who’s counting?) of college you’ll have run-ins with your roommates at some point or another. Sometimes even friendships are ended over these debacles. Lucky for you I’m here to cover the six main problems, and how to get around these conflicts. Before you can even begin to follow the tips I will give, you need to know these will not help if your roommate is any of the following: a psycho, a failure, a baby mama or daddy, or a deadbeat. In those cases further action needs to be taken. Cleaning: Ah, the number one issue amongst most college roommates. There’s bound to be at least one dirty animal in the house that thinks their shit don’t stank. Well listen here Miss Thang, it does. And if you want to avoid your roommates being embarrassed by you I suggest you learn some basic cleaning techniques. Like, if you eat out of a dish that is not disposable, clean it. Don’t let your dirty dishes pile up and be left for your roommate(s) to worry about. Also, don’t leave trash around the living room; it’s as easy as picking it up and walking it to a trash can. Last time I checked that’s not a work out. If anything keep your mess contained in your room. If you must have a little disorder in your life, that’s your space. Property Issues: Nothing irritates a roommate more than when their shit gets moved and they can’t find it. In a house of 2, 4 or 6 it’s bound to get confusing when you’re dealing with food, toiletries, booze, etc. Honestly, the best way to get around a fight in is to come to a common understanding with your roommate(s) regarding what can and cannot be used. It may come across as bitchy, but at least it saves you from having to debate whether you bought that Red Bull or your roommate did. Also, don’t be careless with property that’s not yours. For example, if your roommates’ couch is in the living room it’s not okay to get drunk, pass out, and piss on it. Again NOT OKAY. Or if it’s not your coffee
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table in the living room do not let your fat friends come over, dance on it, and break it. If you’re aware of what’s yours and what is not, and respect others property, everything will be fine. Bills: Bills are a student’s worst nightmare, hands down. Rent, utilities, cable and internet are just a few of the many bills we are expected to pay in college. If you’re lucky, (which most of us are not, let’s be real) your parents take care of this. The rest of us work our asses off either throughout the summer or all year long to make enough money to slide by. It can be discouraging watching momma’s boys and daddy’s girls getting everything handed to them on a silver platter, but don’t let that keep you from doing your thing and making them dolla dolla bills. Early to bed/Early to rise: When it comes to bed times and when everyone is getting up, most college households won’t be in sync with one another, seeing as everyone has different schedules. The easiest way to avoid a fight in this area is to BE RESPECTFUL AND AWARE OF YOUR SURROUNDINGS. I repeat BE RESPECTFUL AND AWARE OF YOUR SURROUNDINGS. If you have roommates who go to bed early on certain night or have to study, don’t decide to throw a party and be obnoxiously loud. Also, be aware that the walls in all college housings are paper thin so don’t have your TV or radio etc. on full blast. If you are the roommate who wakes up before the rest, don’t think it’s okay to bang the cabinets as you make your breakfast or stomp around like an animal while getting ready, it’s not okay. Students are the grumpiest in the morning seeing as though now that they’re up they have to go sit in class all damn day; probably hung-over because let’s face it, we’re not all overachievers. Drunken disputes: Alcohol tends to bring out a side of us every so often that we aren’t too proud of. Sometimes there may be things said that we will probably regret and usually to the people we’re around the most, our roommates. To avoid having this
04: The Truth About Being A Super-Senior
Superman is kinda cool. Super Mario Brothers is as well. Super seniors? Not quite as much.
drunken brawl with your roommates, a fight that’ll be worse than it would be sober, you should probably say what you need to say before a night of heavy drinking. Because when the alcohol starts pouring and you start binge drinking there’s no telling what may come out of that big whore mouth of yours. Be prepared for the apocalypse in your apartment if there are unspoken problems, they’ll arise when intoxicated. relationship issues: This category can be explained in many different ways. If you’re a couple and you fight constantly, don’t put your roommates through the hell of having to hear it all the time. Take the fight elsewhere. Nobody wants to live with Sam and Ronnie, it’s the easiest way to push your roommates away and look at you like you’re a psychopath.If you are the person who always has their significant other over, don’t overdo it. Your roommates may not voice this, but sometimes they want to walk around naked and not worry about a guy/girl being in the house. Or maybe they (and I know this may be a surprise to some of you) just want to spend time with you alone, roommates love to bond and in most cases are good friends, take a break from your attached-at-the-hip lifestyle to spend time with the people you live with. Boyfriends and girlfriends who are over a lot also think it’s okay to make themselves at home, yes they should feel comfortable, but not so comfortable they’re walking around in their boxers or eating whatever they want. Know your limits.PDA! This is a big one. Do not think it’s okay to have sex in the common places in the house; you have a room, so use it. Nobody wants to be watching TV in the common area while you’re starring in your own porno across the room. If you have any of these problems with your roommates take my advice into consideration, and respect your roommates. These lessons we learned in elementary school really do apply in all situations. Now go home and follow my guidelines before you end up the next roommate voted out da house.
05: The Den: Friend or Foe
The Den giveth (Den Pop) and The Den taketh away (your fake).
07: A Nerd’s Friday Night
Let’s just say their mornings are better than your mornings.