UAD June 2012

UNCLE ANDY’S DIGEST

.com

GET YOUR DIGEST ON!

FREE JUNE 2012

Take the first step to owning your own home FIRST TIME HOMEBUYER SPECIALIST ★ Low Fixed Rates ★ FHA, VA, Rural Development & MSHA Loan Programs ★ Experienced & Local Mortgage Professionals We also offer ★ Close Fast & On Schedule refinancing ★ Over the Phone Approvals

Residential Mortgage Service, Inc. 777.1551

181 Center St.; Auburn, Maine 04210 www.rmsmortgage.com •dbodwell@rmsmortgage.com

This is not a commitment to lend. Availability dependent upon approved credit and documentation level, acceptable appraisal, and market conditions.

Residential Mortgage Services, Inc. is a Maine Corporation Headquartered at 24 Christopher Toppi Drive, South Portland, ME 04106. ME License No. SLM2537

Armandsab@aol.com

Shown: One-of-a-kind Watermelon Tourmaline

Debbie Bodwell, Vice President NMLS# 280336

Maine Gemstone Headquarters Always buying Gold, Silver & Coins!

138 Main Street, South Paris 744-0290 • 1 800 686-7633 • www.creaserjewelers.com

New Patients Always Welcome!

Complete, comprehensive dentistry for ages 3 to 103

Preventative dentistry cleanings and fillings Cosmetic dentistry whitening, bridges, crowns, implants & more We accept most insurances Financing available

TAYLOR BROOK DENTAL ASSOCIATES

27 MILLETT DRIVE, AUBURN • 784-1577 TAYLORBROOKDENTAL.COM

Eclipse Timing

There are 2,598,960 possible poker hands with 52 cards.

Submitted by Jimbo

An astronomer is on an expedition to Darkest Africa to observe a total eclipse of the sun, which will only be observable there, when he's captured by cannibals. The eclipse is due the next day around noon. To gain his freedom he plans to pose as a god and threaten to extinguish the sun if he's not released, but the timing has to be just right.

So, in the few words of the cannibals' primitive tongue that he knows, he asks his guard what time they plan to kill him.

The guard's answer is, "Tradition has it that captives are to be killed when the sun reaches the highest point in the sky on the day after their capture so that they may be cooked and ready to be served for the evening meal."

IN IN IN

STOCK STOCK STOCK

IN STOCK

Lots of BOUND Lots of VINYL

Lots of CARPETS

Lots of TILE

Stop in and see our all new tile showroom!

Exclusive Dealer of

Flooring SALE Large Selection of In-Stock Carpets plus • Hardwood • Laminates • Ceramic Tile • Carpet Rems • Vinyl Rems Bound Rugs & Runners

"Great," the astronomer replies.

NEW! Exclusive Dealer of

The guard continues, though, "But because everyone's so excited about it, in your case we're going to wait until after the eclipse."

Be tender to the young, compassionate to the aged, tolerant with the weak. For in your life you will be all of these.

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

2

JUNE 2012

783-7039

RUGS

shrmarnold@megalink.net

Hours: Monday 8-7pm Tues - Fri. 8-5pm Sat. 9-2pm

550 Lisbon Street, Lewiston, ME • 782-0831

www.shermarnolds.com 70 million decks of cards are sold in America each year.

It takes a lobster approximately seven years to grow to be one pound.

MODERN WOODMEN OF AMERICA JUNE 2012 Saturday, June 2nd Crepe/Buffet Breakfast 7am – 10am (Chapter 12907) Franco Center, Cedar St. Lewiston $3 Member $4 Guest Saturday, June 2nd Bean Supper 4:30pm – 6pm (Chapter 8609) Franco Center, Cedar St, Lewiston $4 Member $5 Guest Wednesday, June 6th Green Ladle Culinary Arts Noon - Sharp (Chapter 12749) 156 East Ave. Lewiston HS $7.50 Member $8 Guest Thursday, June 6th Danny’s on the Mall 4pm –6pm (Chapter 7938) Main St, Brunswick $1 Person Tuesday, June 12th Luiggi’s 4pm – 7pm (Chapter 14437) 63 Sabattus Street, Lewiston $4.50 Member $5 Guest Tuesday June 19th Taber’s 4pm – 7pm (Chapter 14346) Lakeshore Drive, Auburn $4.50 Member $5 Guest Aquaboggan TBA Combo Fun/Splash $25.50 member / $27 guest Funtown $19 member / $20 guest Splashtown $18.50 member / $20 guest StoryLand $24 member / $25 guest WaterCountry $24 member / $26 guest York Animal Kingdom $10 member / $11 guest

Cheese, wine, and a friend must be old to be good.

TICKETS ARE LIMITED – NO RETURNS & NO REFUNDS ALLOWED Please Note: Prices, Dates and Menu are subject to change. If additional info is needed, please call our office, please do not call restaurants. All activities can only be attended at the times listed. *************************** Tickets need to be purchased at the Modern Woodmen District Office, 184 Webster Street, Lewiston for all activities and can only be picked up the week prior to the activity, Monday – Thursday 9am - 4pm & Friday 9am Noon (excluding Holidays). FMI call 782-1833.

Uncle Andy’s Digest MAILING ADDRESS: PO Box 3363 Auburn, ME 04212 E-MAIL: editor@UncleAndys.com PHONE: 207 783-7039 FAX: 207 777-3898

www.UncleAndys.com JUNE 2012 Staff JIMBO

If it weren’t for electricity we’d all be watching television by candlelight. – George Globol

Quality Customized Denture Work FREE CONSULTATIONS Poorly fitting or broken dentures repaired on-site, usually same-day service!

Affordable Dentures • Flexible Payment Plans • Credit/Debit Cards Most Dental Insurances Accepted

Smile Again Dentures

Mac Wars

TRAVIS Happy Daddy’s Day

801 Webster Street, Lewiston

UNCLE ANDY

514-0660

Coming Out Bet The Dice To Win or Lose

www.smileagaindentures.com smileagaindentures@gmail.com

Joe & Mike Adkins

MAGGIE Hitting the Deck

The towels were so thick there I could hardly close my suitcase. – Yogi Berra

MARTY The Deliverer

ONE PAYS! TWO PLAY!

Pay just one green fee and a friend plays free. Or, pay for two green fees and two play free.

ANGIE Mob Boss

Uncle Andy’s Digest is published by the first Friday of every month by Maine Mountain Ocean Group, Inc. with offices at 9 Grove Street, Auburn, ME. It is distributed free throughout Central Maine and mailed to subscribers all over the world. Subscriptions are $30/year. Send a $30 check made out to Uncle Andy’s Digest to: P.O. Box 3363, Auburn, ME 04212

2 for 1

Monday Night Scrambles

Must present this coupon to receive

ONE FREE GREEN FEE

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

4

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Junior Golf Schools

for each paid green fee. Cart fee mandatory for each player. May not be combined with other offers. Good for 18 holes, Monday thru Thursday all day, Friday thru Sunday after 1 p.m. excluding holidays, tournaments and twilight play.

Age 11-17 Starting in July!

✃Expires 6.30.12

Call Gray Rec. Dept. at 657-2323 for info/sign-up

Uncle Andy’s Digest is not responsible for typographical errors that may occur in advertisements.

5:00PM Shotgun Start - Every Monday Singles or full teams are accepted

Route 100 in Gray • Just minutes from Turnpike Exit 63 For tee times contact Ben Morey at 657-2586

GOLF CLUB AT COLE FARMS www.springmeadowsgolf.com

I’ve got a problem for your solution.

I told my dad I stopped raising hell and he called me a quitter!

Out ’n About at the First Annual Bike Night at the American Legion Post 31

Maine’s ONLY premier indoor “TOP GUN” shooting range Everyone welcome

I’ll give you this ticket if you tell me who makes the decisions about your payroll...

• Firearm rentals • Lessons • Open Daily

• Call for prices & membership • Concealed weapons classes

481 Maine St. Poland Spring 998-2806 • 576-9535 576-1553

My sarcasm only gets me in trouble when my brain-to-mouth filter is malfunctioning.

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

JUNE 2012

UNCLEANDYS.COM

5

Out ’n About at the First Annual Bike Night at the American Legion Post 31 All cool Shawn’s spell their names with a “C” in it.

I'm writing a book about the recession. It starts with Chapter 11.

SUN, FUN & FRIENDSHIP CAMP CONNOR SUMMER DAY CAMP Kids entering grades 1-8 in the Fall

Open House/Meet the Staff Saturday, June 9th, 10am-1pm FREE Lunch, FREE Transportation FREE pre- & post-camp care at the Y Tour the camp, meet the staff!

Registration is NOW OPEN! June 18th - August 17th Register for the summer or any number of individual weeks

Camp Connor is located on Lower Range Pond in Poland.

THE SUMMER TO DISCOVER Schawn Ward Taylor

Y KIDS CAMP Ages 5-8, Based at the Y Camp hours: 6am - 6pm • Swimming Daily, Outdoor Play, Weekly Field Trips • FREE LUNCH June 18th - August 17th Register for the summer or any number of individual weeks

FUN, WITH A SPLASH OF CONFIDENCE YOUTH SWIM LESSONS Check out our Post 31 on Washington Ave in Auburn.

Ages 6 months & up Camp hours: 6am - 6pm • Swimming Daily, Outdoor Play, Weekly Field Trips

COLLEGE STUDENT SPECIAL JUNE-AUGUST All-inclusive membership plus FREE Christmas break membership

• FREE LUNCH

$96.75

Next to County Building, Auburn www.alymca.org • 795-4095 Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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This sentence contains exactly threee erors.

The larger the lake of knowledge the longer the shore of wonder.

Out ’n About at the John F. Murphy Homes 35th Anniversary Party A little interlude is good for the soul.

Phil House Pianist

If you let go of the past, it no longer has a hold on you.

Little known Cathedral Caverns near Grant, Alabama has the world's largest cave opening, the largest stalagmite (Goliath), and the largest stalagmite forest in the World.

Claire Poirier The face of a penny can hold about thirty drops of water.

DB

DANIEL BUCK

Appraisals of Personal Property Including: • Antiques • Silver items • Old Books • Furniture

• Paintings • Porcelain & Pottery • Any and all historical items

Normand & Alda Levesque

“We can also assist our clients with the sale of their items.

Call or stop by and let me help you discover the true value of your treasures.”

212 Center St., Auburn (Inside Republic Jewelery)

danielbuckappraisals.com • 207-407-1444 And on the eighth day God said, "Okay, Murphy, you're in charge!"

Betty Perkins Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

JUNE 2012

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The legend of MONOPOLY It was 1934, the height of the Great Depression, when Charles B. Darrow of Germantown, Pennsylvania, showed what he called the MONOPOLY game to the executives at Parker Brothers. Can you believe it, they rejected the game due to "52 design errors"! But Mr. Darrow wasn't daunted. Like many other Americans, he was unemployed at the time, and the game's exciting promise of fame and fortune inspired him to produce the game on his own.

With help from a friend who was a printer, Mr. Darrow sold 5,000 handmade sets of the MONOPOLY game to a Philadelphia department store. People loved the game! But as demand for the game grew, he couldn't keep up with all the orders and came back to talk to Parker Brothers again. The rest, as they say, is history! In its first year, 1935, the MONOPOLY game was the best-selling game in America. And over its 65-year history, an estimated 500 million people have played the game of MONOPOLY! Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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When somebody tells you nothing is impossible, ask him to dribble a football. – Author Unknown

COMPREHENSIVE FAMILY DENTAL CARE IN A RELAXING, COMFORTABLE ATMOSPHERE

Kevin M. Connelly, D.M.D.

Dr. Connelly has served Greater Lewiston/Auburn for the past 11 years.

He is proud to now offer comprehensive and caring dental treatment at his new office.

Now Accepting New Patients Financing options available Stop in and visit the new practice:

Kevin M. Connelly, D.M.D.

1065 Lisbon Street, Lewiston (lower level)

376-4977 www.kevinconnellydmd.com Mon. - Fri. 8:00am - 4:30pm

Today is the last day of some of your life.

Love your enemies. It makes them so damned mad. – P.D. East

One Stop Shop for Catering... Dad’s does it all!

Hot & Cold Buffet-Style Catering

Weddings

Indoor or Outdoor

Summer BBQ Corporate Functions

Reunions

Professional service at an affordable price

Call Diana or Larry for more info and pricing!

We can accommodate any size party small, large or enormous!

Ask us about Tents, Tables, Chairs, Dance Floor, etc. for your event re’s The e...

E lik C A O PL

N

Dad’s Place Catering Division • 345-9009

www.dadsplace.info

Warning: Humor may be hazardous to your illness. – Ellie Katz

FRESH HOT PIZZA! Subs • Sandwiches Wraps • Burgers Italians • Daily Specials Breakfast items Cold beer Agency Liquor Store and so much more!

$ .50

2

OFF any large Specialty Pizza

There’s NO PLACE like...

Dad’s Place 23 Pleasant Street, Mechanic Falls • 345-5551 • www.dadsplace.info

Must present coupon Cannot be combined with any other offers UAD

Every survival kit should include a sense of humor. – Author Unknown

Expires 6.30.12

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

JUNE 2012

UNCLEANDYS.COM

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3 Day Tennis Match The longest tennis match took place at Wimbledon 2010 when John Isner of the United States beat Nicolas Mahut of France 6-4, 3-6, 6-7 (7), 7-6 (3), 70-68 in a match that lasted 11 hours and 5 minutes, played over 3 days, June 22, 23 and 24.

A termite walks into a bar and asks, "Is the bar tender here?"

Get Dad a unique gift this Father’s Day. Or get him a gift card and let him pick his choice!

All your salt water tank needs right here!

Marine Fish • Coral • Supplies 272 South Main St. Auburn • www.deepseacreations.com • 1-888-782-4372 • 782-4372

My Computer is bigger than your Computer 1 Bit = Binary Digit 8 Bits = 1 Byte 1000 Bytes = 1 Kilobyte 1000 Kilobytes = 1 Megabyte 1000 Megabytes = 1 Gigabyte 1000 Gigabytes = 1 Terabyte 1000 Terabytes = 1 Petabyte 1000 Petabytes = 1 Exabyte 1000 Exabytes = 1 Zettabyte 1000 Zettabytes = 1 Yottabyte 1000 Yottabytes = 1 Brontobyte 1000 Brontobytes = 1 Geopbyte

Show Dad a little love this Father’s Day! Sunday, June 17th

That’s Quick!

The time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement?

One bananosecond Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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Rt. 4 in Turner • Just past Twitchell’s Airport • 225-3432 • www.G3Firearms.com

Without geography, you're nowhere. – Author Unknown

New Auburn Business District ANY MAKE... ANY MODEL... ANY PROBLEM...

Call us today!

NO PROBLEM!

Out ’n About at the First Annual Bike Night at the American Legion Post 31

Ridin’ is Livin’!

• Appointments required, please call first • Fully warranteed & certified • $55/hr labor rate

Brad’s Precision Auto Brad Johnson

144 Riverside Dr., Auburn • 333-0364

Roller Skating = Family Fun Reserve your Birthday Party NOW!

Thursday Night

Ages 20+ 7:30-10pm

Friday Night

All Skating 7:30 - 10:30

Sat. & Sun.

1:30 - 4:00pm

Saturday Night

Family Night 7:30 - 10pm

Sunday Night

All SK8 • 7:30 - 10pm

No, you can’t have a bite.

Find us on Facebook

12 Riverside Drive, Auburn • 777-3940 www.rollodrome.com

WOW!

Skate Schedule

Mike Downing

Dan Larrivee & Rachel Potvin, Owner/Operators

Don’t spend $18 at the beauty salon, get your...

Mens & Boys CUTS for

All day – Every day! Walk-ins welcome.

$

12

Flat Tops - Fades - Mohawks - Mens & Boys Regular Cuts

Marcel’s Barber Shop

54 Mill Street, New Auburn

783-3444 OPEN: Tues-Fri 7:30am - 5:30pm; Sat 7:30am - 2pm

The chicken came first - God would look silly sitting on an egg. – Author Unknown

Everything is ok in the end, and if its not ok, then its not the end.

Submitted by Courtney Marston Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

JUNE 2012

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Out ’n About at the Walk for Wishes event

New Auburn Business District

Rolly’s Diner Just good cookin’ and plenty of it!

Breakfast & Lunch Specials Daily

Rolly’s is awesome!

It’s delicious and they’re quick.

Beth and Axel Favreau How do you like my piercing?

I just had it done.

• Unusual Omelettes • Crepes • Breakfast All Day • Extensive Menu 87 Mill St. New Auburn 753-0171 (for take-out)

ut Check o new Rolly’s menu!

Shannon Perron

Mon – Sat 5 am – 2 pm Sunday 7 am – noon

Ability is what will get you to the top if the boss has no daughter. – Author Unknown

NO ORDER TOO SMALL And no minimum purchases! Call us for a FREE quote!!

Textile & Paper Wipes

Pacqui

• Sorbents & Safety Supplies • Janitorial Supplies & Can Liners • Breakroom & Food Service • Chemicals & Cleaners • Packaging • Skin Care • And More!

Towels, Tissues & Dispensers

NEXT DAY DELIVERY IN L/A! Claude Fontaine Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis

12

& Jimbo

JUNE 2012 783-7039

120 Mill St., Auburn • 784-5779 or 1-800-439-WIPE • GoodmanWiper.com Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.

– Charles Schulz

New Auburn Business District

L/A’s Newest Gun Shop

Tactical Weapons • Rifles & Shotguns Hand Guns • Personal & Concealed Carry Guns Ammo & Targets • Special Orders

Out ’n About at the Walk for Wishes event

Emily & Ella Trider

32 Riverside Drive, Auburn • 782-6569 Mon - Fri 9am - 5pm • Sat 9am - 2pm

LOBSTER & CLAM BAKE Includes: 1 Ear of Corn 1-1/4 lb. Lobster 2 Red Potatoes 1 lb. Clams Side of butter

All cooked!

(Please call one hour before pickup)

$

15 $ 17

soft shell hard shell

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY to all the dads out there!

Always Fresh LaRochelle’s Seafood

“If we were any fresher you’d have to slap us!”

We ship anywhere in the US

Angie & Dustin Larochelle

22 Mill St., New Auburn • 782-3150 • Open daily 9am-6pm

Dear Valued Customers, I understand that some of you may have received word that we have gone through some major changes.

I am writing this letter to let you know that you can and will continue to receive the quality service that you have grown to expect at New Major Automotive, located at 250 Broad Street, Auburn.

We have joined forces with Moon Recoveries & Towing to better serve you. If you can't bring your vehicle to us, we'll come get you.

So, give Don Gilks, my Operations Manager a call and let him schedule you in today.

Sincerely, Rick Coron, Owner

NEW MAJOR AUTOMOTIVE 783-4933 250 Broad Street, New Auburn www.majorauto.net

A/C RECHARGE

SAVE $40 ONLY $

129.95

(Reg. $169.95) Most Vehicles With Coupon Only Expires 6-30-12

$

10 OFF

LABOR RATE/HR With Coupon Only Expires 6-30-12

Laughter is a smile with the volume turned up.

Please use our advertisers!

Let ‘em know you saw ‘em here!!

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

JUNE 2012

UNCLEANDYS.COM

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Out ’n About at the Walk for Wishes event

New Auburn Business District

FRIDAY LADIES NITE

$ .00

1OFF

Tues. Karaoke Nite Wed. Open Mike Nite Sat. Baked Beans Mon.-Thur. 2-6pm Sunday Brunch 10-2pm

Happy Hour

Any purchase of $5.00 or more (food only)

LATE NITE MENU FRI. & SAT. TIL MIDNIGHT Melissa & Ridge Field We love making wishes come true!

Father’s Day

4-5pm

Dinner

Sunday, June 17th Steak, Baked Potato & Veggie $10 order by June 15th

Brenda Fontaine

7 Second Street, Auburn 782-9039

Stretching does the body good...

Classic Car Show Starts June 8th, 6-8pm EVERY FRIDAY NIGHT JUNE, JULY & AUG.

Don’t miss it!

Sports Banquet for all N.A.S.C. Teams

New Auburn Social Club

Watch for posters/flyers

Opening for New Members $20

New Membership

700 Members Strong Stop by and say Hi!

Yvon’s Car Wash n’ Lube

$

Yvon’s Car Care Centers

Receive FREE

Automatic Car Wash

$

& Jimbo

783-7039

3 OFF

5 OFF

Premium Oil Change

(Between ROOPER’s and BURGER KING) Hours: Mon-Fri: 8am - 5pm • Sat. 8am - 2pm

JUNE 2012

10

with Oil Change

698 Main Street • Lewiston • 777-3600

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis

$

Second Year

Basic Oil Change

Tuesday: Seniors’ Day Wednesday: Ladies’ Day Thursday: Veterans’ Day

14

Expires 6/30/12

ed Beans k a B 47 Broad Street dy’s n New Auburn A www.firehousegrill.biz e of m o 376-4959 H

A drop of ink may make a million think.

Limit one coupon per customer.

Expires 6/30/12

The Kentucky Derby is the oldest continually held sports event in the United States (1875); the second oldest is the Westminister Kennel Club Dog Show (1876.)

Retirement

Out ’n About with the “Bat Girl” at Fenway Park in Boston

My partner and I pulled our police cruiser up behind a car stopped on the shoulder of the highway. We got out and asked the driver if we could help. No, he replied, there was no trouble; he had just stopped to look at a map. When we turned back, we noticed that his German shepherd had jumped in the open passenger-side front window of our car.

Cathy Holt, a breast cancer survivor, was honored by the Boston Red Sox as their honorary bat girl at the Red Sox vs. Cleveland Indians on Mother’s Day.

What an awesome experience! By the way, I have room on my Red Sox tattoo to add another year for their next World Series championship.

Let’s make it happen! Whadda ya say, TC?

Thank you for bringing your winning attitude to Boston! The Red Sox needed this!!

Tom “TC” Caron & Cathy Holt, TC, a Maine native, is the voice of NESN

You never know, Brian.

But it looked like Cathy had the better arm...

Dustin, what are the chances of Bobby V. putting me in at second base for an inning?

Oh Dusty, I just love you!!

Brian & Cathy Holt flank Dustin Pedroia in pre-game festivities on Mother’s Day in the Boston Red Sox dugout

The 'Easter Island Heads' actually have bodies, they're buried under the ground.

Submitted by Jimbo

"You may think there's no trouble," I smiled, "but your dog obviously thinks he's done something wrong. He's in our patrol car."

He laughed. "He probably thinks you've come to take him to work," he replied. "He's a retired police dog."

Life in the 1500's Submitted by Jim Collins

Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and they still smelled pretty good by June. However, since they were starting to smell, Brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor.

Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

JUNE 2012

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Artistic Class

Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry. – George Ade

Submitted by Richard Collins

A kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child’s work.

As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.

The girl replied, "I’m drawing God." The teacher paused and said, "But nobody knows what God looks like."

Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."

mention this ad and receive

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to see our specials

Happy Fathers Day!

1117 Center Street • Auburn (in MetLife Plaza)

Woodward Ave in Detroit, Michigan carries the designation M-1, named so because it was the first paved road anywhere.

Attention Wholesalers!

Offer something truly unique to your summer shoppers!

10% OFF your first order, or talk to us about consignment opportunities

207-754-0415

www.fauxnettricks.com • info@fauxnettricks.com Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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Adolescence and snow are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough.

Be as friendly to the janitor as you are to the chairman of the board.

RMS Titanic Submitted by Richard Collins

The official name of the TITANIC was RMS Titanic. RMS stood for ROYAL MAIL SHIP. When the Titanic was sinking, many hundreds of people jumped into the 28 degree water rather than go down with the ship.

It is agreed, by many people who have investigated, that only 10 people survived the water. Among the 10 survivors was Charles Herbert Lightoller, the titanic’s second officer.

He was the highest ranking crew member to survive. He later distinguished himself in 1940 when he and his son in his boat aided in the rescue of 338,000 British Expeditionary Forces stranded on the French port beaches of Dunkirk, with German tanks only 10 miles away. This operation has been called the greatest rescue in history. Hitler ordered his forces to stop. Other than Stalingrad, this has been called Hitler’s biggest blunder. He could have had them all.

In 1967, Bill Carskadon of Chicago was recorded as having the longest dream on record (as measured

by REM sleep), a dream of 2 hours and 23 minutes!

Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without.

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

JUNE 2012

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Corporate Lessons

It is the pain of sacrifice or the pain of regret.

Lesson number one: A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?" The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it. Moral of the story is: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

“A proud member of the Napa Auto Care Team.”

VOTED BEST OF THE BEST 13 YEARS RUNNING (Market Surveys of America)

FRONT END ALIGNMENT

OIL CHANGE

$75.95 Most Vehicles

Rest in Peace Maureen Myrick.

$24.95

Up to 5 qts. Most Vehicles (Not including Diesels or Heavy Trucks)

Hours: Open Monday-Thursday 7-5pm • Friday 7-Noon

The word posh, which denotes luxurious rooms or accommodations, originated when ticket agents in England marked the tickets of travelers going by ship to the Orient.

Since there was no air conditioning in those days, it was always better to have a cabin on the shady side of the ship as it passed through the Mediterranean and Suez area.

Since the sun is in the south, those with money paid extra to get cabin's on the left, or port, traveling to the Asia, and on the right, or starboard, when returning to Europe.

Hence their tickets were marked with the initials for Port Outbound Starboard Homebound, or POSH. Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

JUNE 2012

Auto Center

1122 Center St., Auburn • 753-0433

POSH

18

Mike Morin’s

783-7039

Out ’n About at the Walk for Wishes event Finger lickin’ good.

Hey, where’s our snack?

Alex Favreau finishes a snack after a good healthy walk

Nick & Emily Trider & Ridge Field

PREVENTIVE MAINTENANCE, AUTO BODY REPAIRS ANY MAKE OR MODEL • Tune-ups • Mechanical & Electrical Repairs • Suspension & Brakes • Body Work & Resprays • Free Inspection Sticker

THE SHOP Mike Smith, owner

COMPLETE CLASSIC CAR RESTORATION AVAILABLE

304 Lisbon St., Lisbon • 353-6100 www.theshopclassicrestoration.net theshop@roadrunner.com

Contingencies have tendencies to become dependencies. – W. Thomas McQueeney

When the well's dry, we know the worth of water. – Ben Franklin

NOW 2 LOCATIONS TO BETTER SERVE OUR CUSTOMERS Check out our newest location: 1315 Sabattus Street, Lewiston

Out ’n About at the John F. Murphy Homes 35th Anniversary Party Did you know that JFM employs over 700 people?

Making us top employers in greater L/A.

Welcome to our Extended Family Hersey’s Auto Repair

Scott Sawyer Loren Hersey - Owner Complete Auto Repairs

Tim Bellmore Independent Auto - Owner

Dave Babb - Sales Associate Independent Auto

Inventory 04 Audi A6, 114K, Grey ................................................................$8795 03 Audi A6, 4.2L, Auto, AWD, White .......................CALL FOR PRICE 02 Audi A4, Blue, Auto ...............................................CALL FOR PRICE 03 Audi Allroad, 99k, Silver.........................................................$9995 06 Chevy Silverado 2500, 4x4, Slate Blue.............CALL FOR PRICE 05 Chevy Trailblazer, Maroon, 4x4, 6cyl, 105k.....CALL FOR PRICE 05 GMC Yukon SLT, 97k, Tow Pkg, 4x4, Metallic Blue........$11470 05 Honda CRV, Manual, 105K ....................................................$9995 04 Honda Element, 115K.............................................................$9490 06 Hyundai Sonata, Burgundy ....................................................$7775 06 Jeep Commander, 95k..........................................................$10444 03 Jeep Liberty, Blue .....................................................................$6795 08 Mazda 3, Electric Blue ..........................................................$10495 06 Mazda 3, 124K .........................................................................$8495 03 Mercedes Benz ML500, Black on Black, AWD, Auto ........$9995 03 Nissan Altima SE, V6, Auto, 97k ........................CALL FOR PRICE 03 Nissan Xterra, 100k, Super Clean, 4x4..............................$6995 02 Nissan Xterra, 107K, Silver....................................................$6995 05 Saab 9-5 Aero, 5-Speed, Navigation, 105k ........................$7495 05 Saab 9-5, 2.3T, Auto, Gray, 118k .......................CALL FOR PRICE 04 Saab 9-5, Black, Auto ...........................................CALL FOR PRICE 03 Saab 9-5, Brown, 102K ..........................................................$6000

99 Saab 9-3, 2Dr, Convertible, Auto........................CALL FOR PRICE 07 Toyota Corolla, Silver ..............................................................$8995 06 Volvo S60, 2.5 Turbo, Black...................................................$7995 05 Volvo V50, 120K ......................................................................$7995 04 Volvo XC90, 2.5T, 90k, 3rd Row, Auto .............................$10495 04 Volvo S40, Red, 121K.............................................................$6995 04 Volvo XC70, 135K, Silver .......................................................$7995 08 VW Jetta Wolfsburg Edition, 113k, 6-Speed, Turbo.......$11990 08 VW Rabbit, Roof, Manual.......................................................$9495 06 VW Jetta, 104K, Black.............................................................$9795 05 VW GTI, 109k, Silver, 5-Speed..............................................$9500 05 VW Passat, Silver...................................................CALL FOR PRICE 03 VW Passat, Wagon, Manual, 1.8T, Green............................$6495 03 VW Passat, 136K, Green ........................................................$6795 03 VW Jetta, Silver, Auto ...........................................CALL FOR PRICE 02 VW Beetle, Manual, 88k.........................................................$6495 02 VW Jetta 98K, Green...............................................................$5995 02 VW Passat, 106K, Black .........................................................$6995 01 VW Golf GL, 5-Speed, 102k, Silver ......................................$5000 01 VW Jetta GLS, 5-Speed ...........................................................$4995 00 VW Jetta GLS, Auto, Blue .....................................CALL FOR PRICE 00 VW Passat, 114K, Silver .........................................................$5795

1298 Sabattus St. & 1315 Sabattus St. • www.independentauto.me If you can't dance, don't blame the dance floor.

Lisa Bolen & Ed Belanger

State Senator Margaret Craven & Laurie Crane-Turton Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

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The road to a friends house is never long. – Swedish proverb

KEEP COOL! GET YOUR A/C RECHARGED NOW!

Foreign Car Service

VOLVOSPECIALIST.NET 140 Riverside Drive, Auburn • 782-9300

SAM’S BODY SHOP Custom Trailer Hitches Sold & Installed Trailer Repairs

Lifetime Warranty • Free Estimates Free Pickup and Delivery

886 Main St. Lewiston • 784-0015 • Open Mon. Wed. Fri. 8:00-4:00

DAN BOYD

LOWER HOME HEATING COSTS! Energy Audits • Infrared Imaging • Blown-in Cellulose Insulation Invest your income tax return into your home to lower future heating cost!

HomeEnergyTechs.com

Contact Rudy 576-0847

Auto Core Pick-up 240-8798 Highest prices paid... PERIOD! Batteries • Aluminum Rims Catalytic Converters S! CALL U E Starters & Alternators WE’LL COM UP!!

PICK IT Radiators *Restrictions apply Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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I’ll pay you CASH for your antiques!

Auction Company

Antiques, House Attics, Basement Items, One Item or Entire Estates Complete Cleanouts Available Sports Items, Guns, Military Items

State & Federally Licensed

Dan Boyd

998-4083 or 754-1009

Do something with Dad on Fathers Day. He’ll love it!

The measure of greatness is not found in your accomplishments. Its in how much discouragement it takes to stop you.

Opportunity is a bald man with a beard: You can catch him coming, but you can' t catch him going.

Out ’n About at the Special Olympics® with Support Solutions

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Complete Auto & Truck Repair • Front End Alignments • Engine Diagnostics • Custom Exhaust • Tires, Batteries

• Transmission Flush • State Inspections • Complete Front End Work • Tune-ups

35 Lewiston Rd. • Gray, ME 04039

Ron Moon, Manager

207-657-5000 Their reaction after hearing the good news (of winning at the Special Olympics and the possibility of their photo appearing in Uncle Andy’s Digest).

JVC. KW, AV, In-Dash, DVD, Radio for the magnificently low price of

$

To learn more about Support Solutions, see their ad on page 31.

329

Career Driven

Next to Republic Jewelry Parking in back of building

216 Center Street, Auburn www.soundeffectsmaine.com

Submitted by Jimbo

So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss called and he said "You've been promoted," and I swerved.

777-3339

Welcome to the team, Ron Major

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10 OFF

any service of $50 or more

with coupon / expires 6.30.12

183 Lisbon St., Lisbon Looking for me? Call today for an appointment!

353-9862

www.qualitycareautorepair.com If you need time alone, try cleaning the house.

Then he called a second time and said "You've been promoted again," and I swerved again.

He called a third time and said, "You're managing director," and I crashed into a tree. A policeman came up and said, "What happened to you?"

I said "I careered off the road."

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

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Corporate Lessons

It is okay to visit your past just don't bring any luggage with you.

Lesson number two: A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients."

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree.

The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Moral of the story: BS might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.

The derivation of the word trivia comes from the Latin "tri-" + "via", which means three streets. This is because in ancient times, at an intersection of three streets in Rome (or some other Italian place), they would have a type of kiosk where ancillary information was listed. You might be interested in it, you might not, hence they were bits of "trivia."

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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Obsessive nose picking is called Rhinotillexomania.

All combined Major League Baseball teams use about 850,000 balls per season.

HIT THE TRAILS IN YOUR NEW ARCTIC CAT ATV!

Welcome to the Benoit's Bakery & Farm Stand Family

SHARE OUR PASSION

AMES SPORT SHOP, Inc 84 Littlefield Road, Auburn • 782-4917 (off Hotel Road & across from Merrow Road)

Lisa Pare' Farm Stand Manager

Your One Stop Shop for Motorcycle Insurance 9 South Main St, Mechanic Falls (207) 345-8711 or 1-800-339-0414 www.CummingsAgency.com

Jeff & Nora Cummings Diane Morissette Leanne Cram

Call or stop in today for a FREE quote!

Stretch Your Gas Mileage with a Fresh Tune-up • Complete Auto Repair Facility • Paint & Collision Repair • Complete Paint Starting at $500 • 24-hour Towing Service • State Inspections

782-5500

845 Washington St. North, Auburn • 782-5500 A badminton shuttle easily travels 112 mph.

Lisa Pare' has recently joined the family at Benoit's Bakery, Wine Cellar & Farm Stand as their Farm Stand Manager. "Lisa is very experienced at what she does and we're lucky to have her on board to manage our farm stand, which is now open for the season," Nick Benoit, Owner of Benoit's recently told Uncle Andy's Digest.

Benoit's Farm Stand is located at 72 Lisbon Rd in Lisbon and features Fresh Native Maine Produce, Jellies & Jams, Cheeses, Smiling Hills Farms Milk, Local Organic Black Angus Beef, Homemade Sauces and much more. Stop by today and say hi to Lisa and check out the farm stand or call 353-7552.

See their ad on page 32.

U2 was originally known as Feedback.

To date, U2 have sold more than 70 million records, grossing $1.5 billion.

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

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Out ’n About at the John F. Murphy Homes 35th Anniversary Party

Volleyball was invented by William George Morgan of Holyoke, Massachusetts in 1895.

SAVE BIG !

E N U J N I

Greg Simpson

Dave Wilbur Did you know that JFM operates over 60 programs locally?

Diane Clukey Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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Liquid air looks like water with a bluish tint.

Approximately one billion snails are served in restaurants annually.

SAVE BIG IN JUN E!

Out ’n About at the John F. Murphy Homes 35th Anniversary Party

Michael Lajoie Lewiston District 71 House Representative

Joan Collins

Roland & Bunny Brutin Did you know that there are coffee-flavored PEZ? Duddley DoRight's Horses name was "Horse."

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

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Ballet Audition There was once a beautiful fairy who yearned to be a ballet dancer. When she heard that the Royal Ballet was holding auditions in a nearby town, she harnessed 100 white pigeons to her chariot and flew to the theater.

The director took one look at the fairy's spectacular entrance and told her to go away.

"But why?" she wailed.

"Because we've got enough pigeon-towed dancers in the company already.

Army Medal of Honor The first time a person was actually awarded the Medal of Honor, was on March 25, 1863. On that date, Pvt. Jacob Parrott was the first of a group of 6 men awarded the Medal of Honor for their actions in April 1862.

Trivia fans: Theodore Roosevelt is the only President to have received the Medal of Honor.

The 5 P’s: Proper Planning Prevents Poor Performance.

BUILDING A NEW HOME THIS SPRING? New home packages like this

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Energy Efficient New Homes • Remodeling • Additions • Energy Efficient Upgrades

R.L. BUILDERS Inc. Quality Residential Construction since 1994

Contact Rudy at 576-0847 RLBuildersinc.com

Bolster Monumental Works Monuments & Markers Cemetery Lettering & Cleaning Since 1877

1278 Main Street, Oxford • 743-2673

David J. Pratt Over 30 years experience

AYURVEDIC WELLNESS CARE A•YUR•VE•DIC Rarely treating the symptoms, Ayurveda cures by removing the cause of disease. It is the oldest surviving complete medical system in the world. Derived from its ancient Sanskrit roots - 'ayus' (life) and 'ved' (knowledge) Ayurveda literally means "Knowledge of Life". It offers a unique blend of science and philosophy that brings harmony of body, mind and spirit.

Ayurveda can help you with: "The greatest discovery of all time is that a person can change his future by merely changing his attitude."

Pain Management • Bonesetting • Stress • Anxiety • Increase Energy Enhance Quality of Life • Improve Memory • Create a Sense of Well-Being & More.

– Oprah Winfrey

For info or an appointment with Chris contact Jen at 207-653-8996

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis

At latitude 60 degrees south you can sail all the way around the world.

& Jimbo

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Christopher Harris, 54 High Street, South Paris

On a dewy morning, if you look at your shadow in the grass, the dew drops shine light back to your eye, creating a halo called a heilgenschein (German for halo).

WE’LL COME PICK UP ALL AUTO CORES

AND GIVE YOU MONEY! We Buy: Batteries................................up to $12.50 each* Aluminum Rims ....................up to $17.50 each* Catalytic Converters.................up to $220 each* Starters & Alternators........... up to $5.50 each* Radiators ..........................................by the pound Copper .................PAYING HIGHEST MARKET PRICES! Brass....................PAYING HIGHEST MARKET PRICES! *Restrictions apply

HIGHEST PRICES PAID... PERIOD! Our lower overhead means more cash for you!!

E R O C O T U A P U K C I P Ron Childs Owner

240-8798 A Chinese checkerboard has 121 holes.

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

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Out ’n About at the Touch a Truck event

Poker Facts: Dead mans hand is Aces and Eights.

CAMERON TIRE & SERVICE, INC. FAMILY OWNED & OPERATED FOR 27 YEARS OUR TIRES

✃

Buy 2 NEW Tires A $24 Value!

and receive a

FREE Oil Change*

Expires 6.30.12

Beth Favreau, flanked by Ansley & Ace Watson

• Wheel alignment & balancing • Complete brake work • Engine tune-up • Lube-oil-filter • State Inspections • Exhaust systems

*5 quarts max, non-synthetic - must have coupon to qualify.

60 Minot Ave • Auburn, ME 04210

A PROUD MEMBER OF THE NAPA AUTO CARE TEAM

782-6666 or 783-2026 Everyone stay back-to... this one is for Uncle Andy’s.

#9 Ted Williams

All these kiddos were glad to be playing games inside the back of a moving truck (no, it wasn’t moving at the time) on Touch-a-truck day.

Johanne & Cash Watson

Boston Red Sox slugger Ted Williams missed almost five full baseball seasons (1943, 1944, 1945, 1952 and 1953) fighting as a fighter pilot in World War II and the Korean War and still managed to hit 521 home runs.

828 Minot Ave. Auburn, ME • 795-6666 / Fax: 795-8983

We do: State Inspections • Minor Repairs

$

5

Labor Rate $48/hr

Offering Services Oil Change New • Complete Engine Flush

OFF

5 Quarts, Full Service with Mobil Oil & Filter (Made in USA)

Most cars. Cannot be combined with any other coupon or discount. Expires 6.30.12

OWNER BILL ROY

• Deluxe Oil Change Package Oil system and fuel system cleaned • Fuel Filters

Karen Gruver watches the bean bag toss

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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Mon.-Fri. 8am-6pm • Sat. 8am-3pm

The total amount of money in a standard MONOPOLY® game is $15,140.

The longest MONOPOLY game in history lasted 70 straight days.

Out ’n About at the Special Olympics® with Support Solutions

Smile if you love the Special Olympics!

Please consider donating to the Special Olympics® Contact Anne Poirier at 795-0672 x2119

The Ring Submitted by Richard Collins

www.donovansauto.com Stop by, call or click today!

946-7515 • 1-800-811-8856

In 1942, General MacArthur, had no choice but to order his troops to retreat to Corrigador Island in Manila Bay, because the Japanese were about to enter Manila.

MacArthur was in command of 60,000 Philippine soldiers and 15,000 American soldiers. Roosevelt knew that they would eventually surrender, There was nothing he could do about it. But he would not allow MacArthur to be taken prisoner. The last thing he wanted was for MacArthur, in chains to be paraded down the streets of Tokyo. Roosevelt in-

The three most-landed-on properties are Illinois Avenue. "GO" and the B&O Railroad.

structed his top naval personnel to get MacArthur off that island. MacArthur, his wife and son, were rescued at night by PT boat commanded

by Lt. Commander Jon Bulkeley who later distinguished himself during the war and won the Congressional Medal of Honor. He was the Admiral in command of the Guantanamo Naval Base during the Cuban missile crisis.

The prisoners were forced to march 90 miles up the Bataan peninsula to a pow camp. They were given no water, no food, and it was very hot. Any man who fell or could not go on was executed by bayonet. A Japanese (continued on next page)

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(continued from previous page)

guard happened to notice a ring on the finger of an American prisoner. He wanted the ring. The prisoner was willing to comply, but he couldn’t get it off his swollen finger. So the guard took out a knife and was going to cut the man’s finger off to get the ring. A Japanese officer, who had been witnessing this drama, walked over, he looked at the ring and said in perfect English, "That is a University of Southern California ring, isn’t it?"

"Yes." said the American. The officer said, "I, too, went to school there." Then he noticed the man’s name on his tattered shirt, and said, "You scored the winning touchdown against Stanford in 1938. I cheered along with everyone else when you won the game for us. You may keep your ring."

Parker Brothers once sent an armored car with one million dollars of the MONOPOLY® game money to a marathon game in Pittsburgh that had run out of funds.

Nervous about seeing the dentist?

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totally relaxed dentistry Now you can stop worrying & start smiling again!

THE CENTER FOR ADVANCED DENTISTRY All your dental needs at one location • Option of conscious oral sedation or IV sedation • Focused individual care • 0% Financing available

Lawyer Laughs Actual questions asked by lawyers taken from official records nationwide:

220 Main Street, Auburn

How long have you been a French Canadian?

Lawyer Laughs Actual questions asked by lawyers taken from official records nationwide:

Do you have children or anything of that kind?

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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Dr. Robert D. Limoges D.M.D. & Dr. Jonathan A. Bernstein D.D.S.

784-7355

or 866-716-6128 www.AuburnDental.com Like us on Facebook! We often post coupons and special offers on our page.

Over 200 million MONOPOLY games have been sold worldwide. More than five billion little green houses have been "built" since 1935.

In Monopoly, the character locked behind the bars is called Jake the Jailbird.

Officer Edgar Mallory sent him to jail.

Eagle Eye Submitted by Jimbo

BRING IN YOUR PHOTOS FOR FRAMING &

GET 25% OFF (Must mention this ad for discount)

23 Cross Street, Auburn • 786-4333 • www.DandRFraming.com

SPRING into a New Career!

WE HAVE OPENINGS IN CENTRAL MAINE

Benefits Include: • Time-off program • PAID TRAINING • Medical, dental & vision

• Employee Assistance Program • And more!

Contact Kim Dionne kdionne@supportsolutions.org The mission of Support Solutions is to inspire and support a culture of possibilities.

We are an Equal Opportunity Employer

124 Canal St., Lewiston • 207-795-0672 ext. 2108

The teenager lost a contact lens while playing basketball in his driveway. After a fruitless search, he told his mother the lens was no where to be found.

Undaunted, she went outside and in a few minutes returned with the lens in her hand.

"How did you manage to find it, Mom?" the teenager asked.

"We weren't looking for the same thing," she replied. "You were looking for a small piece of plastic. I was looking for $150."

Hippy Talk Having been raised on CD's, I asked my hippie uncle how records were in the old days.

He said, "Groovy."

Book your summer lessons now!

• Guitar • Voice • Violin

• Piano • Bass • Banjo • Mandolin • Music Theory • Brass & Woodwinds

We also sell and service all types of instruments

Main St. Music Lessons Authorized Service Center

& Instrument Repair

376-3376

134 Main Street, Auburn www.mainstreetmusiclessons.com

A fifth suit was added to a deck of playing cards in 1937 but never caught on because people did not want to buy new decks.

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Out ’n About at the John F. Murphy Homes 35th Anniversary Party

LeRiche & John Collins

Marta Howard & Caleb Howard Did you know that JFM maintains a well-trained workforce?

Las Vegas Casinos are not legally obligated to pay off their gambling debts.

Bakery WineCellar &

Egg, Ham & Chicken Salad 2 Soups Every Day Meat & Salmon Pies

Cheese Fudge Pastries Breads Wine tastings & more Over 500 labels of wine & Champagne

72 Lisbon Road • Lisbon, Maine • 353-7552

www.benoitsbakery.com

FARM STAND NOW OPEN Fresh Native Produce VIcki Ward & Bob Ouellette

FRESH FRUIT Cheeses - Milks & More

John F Murphy Cake Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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Everything you need in your pantry & fridge!

FRESH VEGETABLES

Famous poker players Groucho Marx got his name from carrying all his money for poker in a "grouch bag".

No one in Greece has memorized all 158 verses of the national anthem of Greece.

Out ’n About at the John F. Murphy Homes 35th Anniversary Party Mr. Mayor, did you know that JFM has a 35 year history of services and supports to children and adults with mental retardation and autism?

Lewiston Mayor Bob MacDonald & Chiara Ferrante of Senator Susan Collins' Office

Two-thirds of the world's eggplant is grown in New Jersey.

Congressman Michaud, did you know that we contribute over 20 million dollars in wages and benefits to the local economy?

Peter Kowolski & Congressman Mike Michaud 170 Main Street • Auburn

782-5920 The last letter of the Japanese alphabet is also the first letter.

"The farther behind I leave the past, the closer I am to forging my own character."

– Isabelle Eberhardt Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

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Ring Around the Rosey

It is considered rude to drive on the right side of the road in England.

The nursery rhyme Ring Around the Rosey is about the plague. Infected people would get red circular sores ("Ring around the rosey..."), these sores would smell badly so common folks would put flowers on their bodies inconspicuously so that it would cover the smell ("...a pocket full of posies..."). People who died from the plague would be burned to reduce the spread of the disease ("...ashes, ashes, we all fall down!")

SHE Before the year 1000, the word “she” did not exist in the English language. The singular female reference was the word “heo”, which also was the plural of all genders. The word “she” appeared only in the 12th century, about 400 years after English began to take form.

“She” probably derived from the Old English feminine “seo”, the Viking word for feminine reference.

Did You Know?

All the dirt from the foundation to build the World Trade Center in NYC was dumped into the Hudson River to form the community now known as Battery City Park.

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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PARTS • SALES • SERVICE WE FEATURE: • Service For All Makes • Parts For All Makes • Sales of New International Trucks • Sales Of Used Trucks Of All Makes

Morrison & Sylvester 1175 Minot Ave. Auburn, ME 04210 783-8548 • www.morrisontruck.net The maximum weight for a golf ball is 1.62 oz.

Charlie Brown's father was a barber.

Out ’n About at Sea 40 Japanese Cuisine

We loved Sea 40, what a great time! I would recommend it to anyone!!

We have sports cards, NASCAR & tin signs for Dad!

WE NOW HAVE OUR FEDERAL FIREARM LICENSE Frankie’s Pawn @

PAWN • BUY • SELL • TRADE Music Equipment • Tools • Electronics • Gifts & Collectibles

128 Lewiston Street, Mechanic Falls • 346-3588 Tues. - Sat. 10-6 • Closed Sun. & Mon.

Vickie Gould

Outdoor Patio • Sandwiches, Wraps, Salads & Smoothies • Party Platters & Boxed Lunches • Breakfast Served All Day HOURS: Mon-Sat 7am-9pm Sun 10am-8pm

Locally Owned & Operated 600 Turner Street, Auburn • 784-3434 • www.heidisauburn.com The only planet without a ring is earth.

Dave Gideon Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

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TIME TO CASH IN! Special pricing for quantities and contractors!

Maine’s Most Trusted Recycler Automobile & Truck Batteries Die Cast Alloy Rims #1 Steel Prepared/better grading/better payout Catalytic Converters Cell Phone Scrap Computer Towers Stainless Electronic Scrap Mother Boards • Core’s Brass • Alternators • Starters • Motors • Pumps Computer Board Scraps Copper • Aluminum • Insulated Wire Electric Motors, Radiators, Transmissions

Always paying the best prices!

Clean scrap = great prices!

Everyone is treated with respect

(prices subject to market changes) We love our customers!

We pay the highest prices in town. Stop by and see us!

15 Pierce Street, Auburn Across from Maine Oxy. Two driveways down from Doggz Inn.

Mon - Fri 8am - 5pm Gary McCraw (L) Lennie Shanahan (R)

615-7057 or 795-8887

Bev & Peter

The oldest exposed surface on earth is New Zealand's south island.

PQ OOLWBUILDERS OF MAINE ,O S .

Out ’n About at Sea 40 Japanese Cuisine

UALITY ORKMANSHIP UTSTANDING ERVICE $

3995 Hannah Estes & Brian Peppe

3 Person

Hot Tub

Picnic Tables

NEW PRODUCT LINE!

Angie & Scott Berry Happy Birthday, Shannon & Lisa!*

from $200 to $350 for 6', 8' and hexagon sizes. Can build to suit.

25% OFF All EZ Color Products

Schedule Your Install or Pool Opening Now! NEW LOCATION

1525 Minot Ave. Auburn

Shannon Wilson & Hannah Estes *See next page for the other birthday girl

www.poolbuildersofmaine.com

Hope is the ability to hear the music of the future.

Faith is having the courage to dance to it today.

Giraffes have no vocal cords.

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis

(across from Coleman’s Collision) Mon-Sat 9-5 • Sunday 10-3

795-7222

&T Jimbo

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UNCLEANDYS.COM 37

Out ’n About at Sea 40 Japanese Cuisine

A baby eel is called an elver, a baby oyster is called a spat.

Gary Cook & Jenny Berry Hey Bro, get your own Scorpion Bowl.

Scott Berry & Jenny Berry

The Birthday Girls

Lisa Arsenault, Shannon Wilson & Jenny Berry Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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When angered, the ears of Tazmanian devils turn a pinkish-red.

Mice, whales, elephants, giraffes and man all have seven neck vertebra.

Poirier’s Market NEW REDEMPTION CENTER

10% EXTRA on all bottles and cans with this coupon

Where did the term "Piss Poor" come from?

Submitted by Jim Collins

Back in the day they used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee in a pot. And then once it was full it was taken and sold to the tannery.

If you had to do this to survive you were "Piss Poor". But worse than that were the really poor folk who couldn't even afford to buy a pot. They "didn't have a pot to piss in".

40 Walnut St. Lewiston

Expires 6/30/12

On a one-dollar bill, there is an owl in the upper left-hand corner of the "1" encased in the "shield" and a spider hidden in the front upper right-hand corner.

Celebration of Courage Co-ed Hockey Tournament June 9th & 10th, 2012 Ingersoll Ice Arena, Pettengill Park in Auburn

Interesting History.

African Marriage Young Son: Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?

Dad: That happens in every country, son.

Ummm...

All proceeds from this tournament are donated to a local family that is fighting cancer

(left to right): Todd Gendron, Kylee Gendron Joey Gendron, Jessie Gendron In the past we have donated all proceeds to Kylee and her family, but this year Kylee has decided that the money needs to go to another local family fighting the battle against cancer.

We are going to be donating all proceeds from the tournament to a local family that is fighting.

Please help us give back by sponsoring or donating today! Thank you!

FMI: Taylor-Paige Harrison, 207-577-7176

https://www.facebook.com/celebratecourage The average garden variety caterpillar has 248 muscles in its head.

During an examination, the student was not able to answer the question so he copied the answer from another good student, The answer to the problem was 'log(1+x)'.

He didn't want to make it obvious that he was cheating, so he changed the answer to 'timber(1+x)'.

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

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EV

ER KAR Y W AO ED KE NE SD AY

Local Restaurants & Entertainment

R EE VE F CO NCE NO TRA EN NO

Out ’n About at the Poland Economic Development Committee’s Business After Hours

Restaurant & Lounge

FUSION IDOL WINNERS Rep. Lois Snow-Mellow & Rep Michael McClellan

1st (L) Shannon, 2nd (M) Trish, 3rd (R) Amanda Anna Waldman & Jennifer Reynolds

NO COVER CHARGE, EVER! ENTERTAINMENT SCHEDULE WEDNESDAY

THURSDAY

Ladies Night Karaoke

Thirsty Thursday

with DJ Jeff St. Amand

$4 Pinnacle Cocktails DJ

FRIDAY

SATURDAY

Live DJ Kool V Entertainment Top 40 Hits Classic Rock

@ Ramada Inn 490 Pleasant St. Lewiston

Cindy Robbins

576-6384

Poland Spring Resort Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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Hang On Sloopy is the official rock song of Ohio.

Local Restaurants & Entertainment

UNBEATABLE BREAKFAST SPECIALS Daily Breakfast Specials served until 11am (All breakfast specials include coffee)

$

5 Washington Street, Auburn • 783-4304 Mon-Fri 5 am to 8 pm • Sat & Sun 6 am to 8 pm Phone Orders Are Welcome

1 OFF 1 coupon per order

✁

Expires 6.30.12

Maine’s premier Hip-Hop Cover Band covering old school classics and new school hits!

Actual questions asked by lawyers taken from official records nationwide:

Q: Have you lived in this town all your life?

A: Not yet.

Any Purchase of $500 or more

Fresh Steak Cut & Ground Daily!

NO COVER • Join us 9pm-1am

00

Lawyer Laughs

The Lord's Prayer is 66 words, the Gettysburg Address is 286 words, there are 1,322 words in the Declaration of Independence, but government regulations on the sale of cabbage total 26,911 words.

Try The PEPI DOG pepperoni, cheese & pizza sauce on a hot dog $

3.79

add mushrooms & peppers for 50¢

We now serve ice cream!

940 Lisbon Street, Lewiston

755-1340 Sorry, we do not accept cards at this time

My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fiber, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes. – Douglas Adams

I GOT MUGGED AT 150 MILL!

Lawyer Laughs Actual questions asked by lawyers taken from official records nationwide:

Q: Do you know how far pregnant you are now?

A: I'll be three months on November 8.

Home of the newest Mug Club in L/A

150 Mill Street, Lewiston • 782-2088 • www.davinciseatery.com Very small clouds that look like they have been broken off of bigger clouds are called scuds.

Q: Apparently, then, the date of conception was August 8?

A: Yes Q: What were you doing at the time?

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Out ’n About at the Poland Economic Development Committee’s Business After Hours

Local Restaurants & Entertainment

MONDAY – JAPANESE DAY

15% OFF ALL JAPANESE ENTREES

TUESDAY – THAI DAY

15% OFF ALL THAI ENTREES Nick Adams Poland Code Enforcement Officer

WEDNESDAY – KOREAN DAY 15% OFF ALL KOREAN ENTREES

TLocally HURSDAY DAY Owned– &SUSHI Operated Joe Cimino

15% OFF ALL SUSHI ITEMS

Poland Spring Trading Post

Thai • Korean • Japanese

jasminecafemaine.com 730 Center Street, Auburn Auburn Plaza

John Cleveland Community Dynamics Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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Alex Perreault & Supannee Saengwong

NEXT TO FLAGSHIP CINEMA

376-4855

Dueling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are registered blood donors.

Local Restaurants & Entertainment

Let’s get up to date at the Chick! “hot off the panini grill”

➨ 3 new draft beers ➨ our famous lobster sub ➨ Not new? Our Great Food ➨ & Great Service!

Join us on

Father’s Day

7 new delicious panini sandwiches Goose Island Honkers Stella • Shock Top

fresh hot loaded crusty lobster sub w/ rings (available every day)

Disetoen Chick-oAf L-ew

Out ’n About at the Poland Economic Development Committee’s Business After Hours

Sunday, June 17th (Reservations taken for parties of 5 or more)

Our Traditional Baked Ham Dinner $9.95 Rosemary Roasted Pork Loin w/Gravy $8.95 Everything on our Menu Available for Take-out

Earl Torrey

You’re gonna like it! NEW CARPETS

1472 Lisbon Street, Lewiston 376-3870

Danielle Fergerson Northeast Bank

The hyoid bone, in your throat, is the only bone in the body not attached to another bone.

Treat Dad to lunch or dinner on Father’s Day, Sunday, June 17th.

Large parties, please call ahead.

Outdoor Patio

165 High Street, Auburn • 782-7796 • Open Tuesday - Sunday • www.villageinnmaine.com Sunbeams that shine down through the clouds are called crepuscular rays.

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OUT ’N ABOUT WITH MIAMI MIKE

Uncle Andy’s Digesters, welcome back! If you’re reading this month’s Out and About with Miami Mike you must be a glutton for punishment and I sincerely thank you!! The flowers are blooming, the birds are chirping and the lawn needs mowing. Summer is officially here. Time to dust off the box fans and citronella candles; we all know firsthand what an appetite those Maine black flies possess. Like a not so skinny princess at the buffet table, they can’t get enough.

I know you are all out at the BBQ most nights grillin’ dogs and smoking t-bones, but when you have run out of propane and all the propane places are closed, you need to try the new Japanese Hibachi in Lewiston. I know what you may be thinking that it sounds too extravagant or that you don’t like Japanese food.

Well it’s not and you do you just don’t know it yet! SEA 40 is a local restaurant who advertises in this here Digest which we all know and love and that’s about as local Maine as it gets. So check them out and watch them cook for you right before your eyes. Trust me it will be a serious upgrade from watching the Mrs. cooking mac and cheese from a box.

After you finish dinner at SEA 40 head over to the newest lounge in LA (Lewiston Auburn not Los Angles ya chowda heads) Fusion Lounge.

Fusion Lounge is the newest most sophisticated night-life establishment in the area. Check out their website at www.fusionlewiston.com if you don’t believe me or even if you do just to get a better idea of their ambiance. And if you missed dinner at SEA 40 it’s not the end of the world, you can eat at Fusion. I will undoubtedly be visiting both of these locations on my next visit and you all will have to join me! As always feel free to email me at uncleandysdigestmiamimike@aol.com and follow me on twitter at UADMiamiMike. Until next month Digesters, remember to mow in straight lines!

Local Restaurants & Entertainment

Check the website at www.kidsbowlfree.com

FBORWELINEG

Visit Uncle Andy’s Digest on Facebook for a chance to

WIN A FREE NIGHT OF GLOW BOWLING with pizza and soda for up to 6 people!

24 Mollison Way • Lewiston

786-2695 www.sparetimerec.com

to see our daily specials & prices

$ 00

2. OFF With this coupon Limit 1 per customer. Expires 7.1.12

The youngest letters in the English language are "j," "v" and "w."

Local Restaurants & Entertainment

Since 1953

www.LuiggisPizzeria.com

The Luiggi's Gang invites you...

EVERY DAY: Regular 1-Topping Pizza with Fountain Drink Only $4.99 Almost all swans and sturgeons in England are property of the Queen and disturbing them is a serious offense.

DECK IS OPEN!

Every Monday throughout June!

Try us for Lunch!

2 Pints

www.macsgrill.com

Steak Chicken Seafood

✠Expires 6.30.12

783-6885

Linda & Griffin from Urban Edge Hair Studio

beer special $ 50

1052 Minot Avenue, Auburn

Ask us about $10 off your highlights!

Just take a look at mine!!

Beautiful I say...

See our ad on page 16 for more info.

$

2 OFF

Any Lunch Special with this coupon Cannot be combined with any other special. One coupon per person.

Many species of bird copulate in the air. In general, a couple will fly to a very high altitude, and then drop. During their descent, the birds mate.

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Weight Room A colleague was planning a trip to my business office and asked if I could find him a hotel with exercise facilities. I called several hotels, with no luck. Finally, I thought I had found one. I asked the receptionist if the hotel had a weight room.

"No," she replied, "but we have a lobby. You can wait there."

"You look sad, Fred, what's the trouble?"

"Domestic trouble."

"But you're always bragging that your wife is a pearl!"

"She really is. It's the mother-of-pearl that's giving me trouble!"

Tough Kids

Local Restaurants & Entertainment

DAILY SPECIALS FOR BREAKFAST & LUNCH Wall of Fame Inductee

I just love a challenge!

Mon-Fri 7am to 2pm • Sat & Sun 6am to 2pm

Egg-ceptional is now offering a new wine and beer selection.

And – A New Dinner Menu!

Simon Kissick of Mechanic Falls

Finish a full-size omelette and have your picture put on our wall of fame!

Open from 7am-2pm every morning, and also 3-8pm on Fridays & Saturdays.

Check us out!

Home of the Double Yolker

Breakfast served all day Superb service • Handicap accessible Comfortable family atmosphere

Egg-ceptional Restaurant & Bakery 5 Pigeon Hill Road Route 26 and 11 , Mechanic Falls • 998-5577

A-1 Steak Sauce contains both orange peel and raisins.

VOTED #1 Casual Restaurant & Best Burgers in L/A area

Three little boys were bragging about how tough they were.

"I'm so tough", said the first boy, "that I can wear out a pair of shoes in a week".

"Well", said the second little boy, "I'm so tough, I can wear out a pair of jeans in a day".

Open Father’s Day!

a i v i r t ntn

Specials & Full Menu Available

"That's nothing", said the third boy. "When my parents take me to see my grandma and grandpa, I can wear them out in just one hour."

120 CENTER STREET PLAZA • AUBURN • 786-0715 • www.gippers.com

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis

The Chinese ideogram for 'trouble' symbolizes 'two women living under one roof'.

& Jimbo

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MLB Baseball Package Watch your favorite team in HD HOURS: Sun–Thurs 11:00am – 11:00pm • Fri & Sat 11:00am – Midnight

Local Restaurants & Entertainment 4th Annual

MUSIC TO OUR EARS

OUTDOOR MUSIC SERIES Saturday June 16th Saturday June 2nd

Bands to be named later To benefit a local cause

Uncle Jack, Beyond the Fall & More To benefit a local cause

See our Facebook page for details on all events!

Saturday June 30th 4 PLUS BANDS

Outdoor Beer Garden 5pm-11pm

TUESDAY

$1.50 Drafts $1.00 Tacos Free Pool

Join us on the 4th of July Between TD Bank & The Hilton THURSDAY

WEDNESDAY

Karaoke 1/2 Price Appetizers

Thirsty Thursdays Buy 1 Drink, get 2nd 1/2 price* *Of equal or lesser value

LIVE BANDS Thurs-Sat

Irish Twins Pub Hours: Tues. – Thurs. 3pm-close • Fri. 11am-close • Sat. 4pm-close

743 Main St., Lewiston • 376-3088 (across from Marden’s)

Milkshakes!

FREE Dessert Tray with $20 order!!

Italians Only $3 Every Saturday & Sunday

Here comes summer... Grab a copy of our brand new menu!

Let’s ROCK!

Georgio’s Locally owned & operated

740 Minot Avenue, Auburn • 783-2981 Open daily 5am-9pm • www.mygeorgios.com

When you see most stars, you're essentially looking hundreds or thousands of years into the past.

Michael J. Peppe on Sax Michael was selected to participate in the 2012 District II Elementary Festival at the Riverton Elementary School in Portland. The Elementary Festival is an annual concert in celebration of the most talented student musicians through District II. Michael is a sixth grader at Elm Street School in Mechanic Falls.

Lawyer Laughs Actual questions asked by lawyers taken from official records nationwide:

Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?

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The Silver Sugar Bowl Not long ago, some people in Connecticut were having a yard sale in an attempt to down size. As in most yard sales there were a lot of household items, a few collectibles mixed in and a few silver items as well. In particular they had an unusual sterling silver sugar bowl that they were asking $125 for. Almost every person and antique dealer that came to their sale looked at the sugar bowl and made offers with some being as low as $50.

But the owners liked this sugar bowl and were not willing to let it go for less than the $125 asking price.

After having two yard sales that summer and selling a great number of items but not the sugar bowl, they called Daniel Buck to help them sell some of their items including the sugar bowl.

Not long after picking up their items Daniel Buck sold the sugar bowl for these clients and returned with a check for nearly $6,000. It was a very rare piece by the early 20th C. American silversmith George Shiebler.

Do you have a sugar bowl, a painting or an antique item that might have more value than you think.

Call Daniel Buck to set up an appointment and we would be happy to assist you.

About 1% of the static seen on old analog TVs is residual radiation from the Big Bang.

BOATS!!!

Full Service & Repairs

• Engine work/replacement • Drive/lower unit repair • Installing all accessories

FULLY STOCKED SHOWROOM • Safety gear • Fish finders • Watersport toys • Batteries • Marine radio • Authorized Venture • Tons of trailer parts & trailer dealer accessories And much more!

30% OFF ALL IN-STOCK WATER TOYS & ACCESSORIES Water Skis, Tow Ropes, Wakeboards, Tubes & More

STOP BY TODAY!

65 North River Rd., Auburn Open 7 days a week: M-S 8-7; S 9-4

784-3888 www.auburnmarineandsmallengine.com

SMALL ENGINE & OUTDOOR POWER EQUIPMENT TANAKA Outdoor Power Equipment • Weedwackers • Leaf blowers • Chainsaws & more

7 YEAR WARRANTY ON NEW TANAKAS

We service all major brands John Deere® Master Technician

Daniel Buck Appraisals 207-407-1444 See his ad on page 7.

Did you hear about the goober who stayed up all night wondering where the sun went?

It finally dawned on him.

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If you cut up a hologram, the entire image is retained in each piece.

Pre-Employment Local, State, National and Federal Criminal History

includes: • SSN Verification/Address Verification • InstaNational Criminal History • Federal Criminal History • Maine SBI Criminal History • Sex Offender/Violent Offender search all states • Interpol / FBI most wanted • Terrorist watch list

$45.00

Tenant Screening

$49.99

State and National Criminal History

includes: • SSN verification/Address verification • InstaNational criminal History • Maine SBI criminal history • Sex Offender/Violent Offender search all states • Interpol / FBI most wanted • Terrorist watch list • Trans Union Credit Report w/ credit score • National Eviction Check (Civil courts, all states)

A La Carte Pricing National Criminal History including Sex Offender all states ................................$18.99 SSN Address Verification.................................................2.75 Employment Credit report ...............................................9.00 Tenant Credit Report w/ score ........................................9.00 State of Maine SBI check...............................................24.00 State of ME drivers license history .................................9.00

Personal and professional reference checks ..............$10.00 Education verification....................................................15.00 Prior Employment verification......................................10.00 Professional License verifications.................................10.00 Single state Eviction check...............................7.00 per state National Eviction Check ................................................11.00

Other verification and Private Investigator services are available.

All searches are conducted and filtered by a licensed private investigator to meet FCRA regulations to reduce your liability.

Pre-adverse and adverse action letters and consumer copies provided at no extra charge to help you stay compliant with current FCRA regulations.

Volume pricing is available. Volume customers can be set up to run reports right from their own office for their convenience.

MID MAINE DRUG SCREENING & INVESTIGATIONS Full Service Drug Testing Company & Private Investigator

577-6000 • www.MMDRUGSCREENING.com The Soviet Sukhoi-34 is the first strike fighter with a toilet in it.

– Douglas Adams

Trivia Do you know the names of the three wise monkeys?

Answer: Mizaru (See no evil), Mikazaru (Kikazaru – Hear no evil), and Mazaru (Iwazaru – Speak no evil).

BACKGROUND CHECKS

Protect me from knowing what I don't need to know. Protect me from even knowing that there are things to know that I don't know.

Protect me from knowing that I decided not to know about the things that I decided not to know about. Amen.

The fourth wise monkey is called Shizaru (Do no evil).

Jet lag was once called boat lag, back before jets existed.

A Good Ribbing A family came home from Church where the sermon was on Adam and Eve. The Mother noticed her son sitting on the bed feeling his ribs. She asked what he was doing.

He said, "I counted these things 3 times now, Mom! I think I'm having a wife."

The roads on the island of Guam are made with coral. Guam has no sand. The sand on the beaches is actually ground coral.

When concrete is mixed, the coral sand is used instead of importing regular sand from thousands of miles away.

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Roberta Flack wrote "Killing Me Softly" about singer Don McLean.

Out ’n About at Mr. D’s Retirement Party After 37 years of teaching at McMahon Elementary School, Ray Deschenes (better known as Mr. D) is retiring. He is a devoted husband, father, brother and teacher.

He has enjoyed his teaching career and will miss discussing sports with the staff and his class. He is an avid Red Sox and Patriots fan. At his retirement party the staff of McMahon presented Mr. D with two tickets to a Patriots game in September; gift cards to the Pro Shop in Foxboro and gift certificates to Gippers where he and his family like to eat. It was jokingly said that if you want to see Mr. D after he retires, just go to Hannaford’s it seems like he’s always there shopping. Good luck Mr. D and enjoy your retirement!

It’s Summer...

Let’s get to work!

Welcome to my world, honey!*

Ray & Mary Deschenes *Mary retired from teaching from Montello School last year after a 40 year teaching career.

When the power of love overcomes the love of power, then the world will know peace. – Jimi Hendrix Mr. D, shown here surrounded by other retirees from McMahon Elementary School in Lewiston

Quilters & Kni tters!

Check out our: • 2000+ bolts of contemporary quilt fabrics • Custom cut jelly rolls, layer cakes & charm packs • Lots of batiks, brights, polka dots & stripes • Huge selection of sock yarn & Maine yarns • Basketry supplies Hours: Mon-Fri 10 to 5; Sat 10 to 4; Tues ‘til 8

909 Minot Ave., Auburn • 784-4486 Quilt-Essentials.com

Diane Morin & Valery Golding present Mr. D with a gift box resembling a football with Patriots tickets inside!

All three major 1996 Presidential candidates, Clinton, Dole and Perot, are left-handed.

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WARNING!

The word "modem" is a contraction of the words "modulate, demodulate."

By Natasha Piirainen

The lights in the house are off and everyone’s asleep except for me, my bladder has awoken me. Knowing the setup of the house like the back of my hand, I make my way downstairs to the bathroom without flicking on a single light-switch. I quickly finish my business, wash my hands, and proceed to make my way back to the stairs.

Then I hear it, a mechanical, robot-voice calling out, “Warning! Warning!” My fight or flight instincts kick in despite my sleepy stupor and I book it up the stairs and hide under my covers for the remainder of the night scared out of my wits and, thanks to my nervous bladder, with another urge to use the restroom.

The next morning my father says to me, “Hey Tash, were you a little jumpy last night?”

“Did you hear it, too?” I respond, “a creepy cyborg voice shouted ‘warning, warning’ at me when I got out of the bathroom!”

He starts to laugh, “That was no cyborg, that was me! I saw you and said ‘morning, Tash’ and ZOOM, you flew up those steps like a monster was chasing you. Or, I guess, an android!”

Suddenly the terror drained and I felt relieved. There was no scary mechanical robot, only my dad. He gets up off the couch and heads into the kitchen, so I take the chance to steal his spot.

But before I sit I look down at the sofa and see a loose screw and washer where my dad had been. Maybe I’m not so safe from robots after all?

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The Greek version of the Old Testament is called the Septuagint.

A twillionaire is a twitterer with a million or more followers.

Out ’n About with the “Bat Girl” at Fenway Park in Boston Cathy Holt, a breast cancer survivor, was honored by the Boston Red Sox as their honorary bat girl at the Red Sox vs. Cleveland Indians on Mother’s Day.

Megan Moody & Cathy Holt Megan nominated her mom, Cathy for the honorary bat girl designation by writing a letter in contest put on by the MLB.

Big Papi, can you hit a home run for my Nana today?

Nathan Moody gets his T-shirt signed in the Red Sox dugout by Big Papi, David Ortiz.

He is the grandson of Cathy Holt

Fishing is the biggest participant sport in the world.

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Thomas Edison filed 1,093 patents, including those for the light bulb, electric railways and the movie camera.

When he died in 1931, he held 34 patents for the telephone, 141 for batteries, 150 for the telegraph and 389 patents for electric light and power.

The Holland and Lincoln Tunnels under the Hudson River connecting New Jersey and New York are an engineering feat. The air circulators in the tunnels circulate fresh air completely every ninety seconds.

It takes a photon, on average, 200,000 years to travel from the core of the Sun to the surface, then just a little over 8 minutes from the Sun's surface to your eyeball, sliding in at 700,000,000 MPH. The first vending machine was invented by Hero of Alexandria in the first century. When a coin was dropped into a slot, its weight would pull a cork out of a spigot and the machine would dispense a trickle of water.

Mark Twain was born on November 30, 1835 when Haley's Comet came into view, and passed away on April 10, 1910, a day after Haley's Comet came into view again.

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About 50% of Americans live within 50 miles of their birthplace. This is called propinquity.

We Buy, Sell & Trade Full Line Gunsmith Service Check out our website for weekly specials!

JTReidgunshop.com

J.T. REID’S GUNS 86 Court St., Auburn • 777-3579 Jamie Pelletier, Manager jtreidsgunshop.com

Hours: 9-5 Mon-Fri • 9-1 Sat

John Reid, Owner

Out ’n About at Mr. D’s Retirement Party As he smiles for the camera Ray contemplates his immediate future activity...

NESN, NFL Network, ESPN! Sports 24/7...

Can’t wait!!

Congratulations

Mr. D on your retirement!

DRIVING RANGE

RESTAURANT

MINI-GOLF

Father’s Day is Sunday, June 17th

Burgers • Dogs L-A’s Be st Onion Rings Frie s • Ice Cre am

TABERS

Open 7 days a week!

Lake Shore Drive, (first left after the lake) Off Rt. 4 in Auburn

www.tabersgolf.com

Midday refers to the moment the sun crosses the local meridian.

Due to earth’s gravity it is impossible for mountains to be higher than 49,000 feet.

Out ’n About at the Poland Economic Development Committee’s Business After Hours

Marc & Sue LaJoie

Mona Bergeron

Dodi Knights Google indexed it’s 1 trillionth unique URL on July 25, 2008.

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Out ’n About at the Poland High School Baseball Teams Annual Golf Tournament

One in ten people in the world live on an island.

All photos by part-time Uncle Andy’s photographer, Julie Mocciola

Sorry honey, did you say something?

PLANNING A BACKYARD WEDDING? Ask about our signature models!

CALL FOR PRICING

G.A. DOWNING 782.4508 or 800.924.4500

Service Rental Sales

111 Woodman Hill Road, Minot www.gadowning.com

Dan Williams, Jimbo & Sue Marston I bet we can burn rubber with this bad boy...

We want to be the easiest part of your week!

Your local option for outsourcing your payroll...

Payroll Management has been serving the payroll needs for small and mid size companies since 1989.

PAYROLL MANAGEMENT, INC.

100 Manley Road, Auburn

Adam Mocciola & Dan Bertrand Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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783-6880 or 800-734-6880 • www.payrollmgt.com

Flickr hosts some 5 billion photographs, Facebook hosts more than 15 billion.

If you count the seconds without stopping, it would take you eleven-and-a-half days to reach one million, and 32 years to reach one billion.

Sunday School Lesson Submitted by Jimbo

TESTIMONIAL Smile Again Dentures Quality Customized Denture Work • Poorly fitting or broken dentures repaired on-site.

801 Webster Street, Lewiston • 514-0660 • www.smileagaindentures.com

Smile Again Dentures has used several forms of advertising over the years. Using Uncle Andy’s Digest has proven to give us the best bang for our buck. It did so early and often and still does to this day. We like the fact that people pick up the Digest and hang on to it. A lot of people that might see or hear a commercial on TV or the radio and it’s forgotten almost immediately. Uncle Andy’s hangs around all month and we know our ad is seen over and over throughout the month. People from all walks of life come in regularly and mention seeing our ad in the Digest. We hear all the time how our clients like seeing the father and son team. Working with the Uncle Andy’s staff is easy and we really enjoy the extra stuff they do to promote our business! We believe any business spending money on advertising should be spending it with Uncle Andy’s Digest.

Joe & Mike Adkins, owners

Advertiser since July 2007 See their ad on page 4 The US nickname Uncle Sam was derived from Uncle Sam Wilson, a meat inspector in Troy, New York.

A Sunday School teacher began her lesson with a question.

"Boys and girls, what do we know about God?" A hand shot up in the air. "He is an artist!" said the kindergarten boy.

"Really! How do you know?" the teacher asked.

"You know, “Our Father, who does art in Heaven. . .”

On March 27, 1964, North America’s strongest recorded earthquake, with a moment magnitude of 9.2, rocked central Alaska.

Each year Alaska has approximately 5,000 earthquakes, including 1,000 that measure above 3.5 on the Richter scale. Of the ten strongest earthquakes ever recorded in the world, three have occurred in Alaska.

Grover Cleveland, the 22nd and 24th President of the United States, was born in Caldwell, New Jersey, on March 18, 1837. He was the only president to serve two nonconsecutive terms and therefore is the only individual to be counted twice in the numbering of the presidents.

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The Meaning of Life How do people determine what their meaning of life is?

I have heard some people say that it is as simple as a vanilla swirl ice cream cone on a hot July day, or as meaningful as watching your child beat cancer and graduate from high school. The most wonderful thing about the meaning of life is that it is different for everyone, and that it changes at any given time depending on what is happening that day or in that exact moment. How wonderful to have the opportunity for so many “meanings” of your life!

Sometimes people do not feel that they have any meaning in their life, or that even though they seemingly have it all (good job, spouse or partner, children, nice home), they are not quite satisfied with who they are or what their life is. Counseling provides a chance for self-reflection, introspection, and personal growth that otherwise may not be known. Many people think that counseling is for those with major mental illness, and while that is true, counseling is also very helpful for all people, including people who just want to feel happier and improve their quality of life. At Health Affiliates Maine, we believe in “Sharing a Journey to Wellness.”

Your journey begins by opening our door. Log on to www.wellnessformaine.com and open our door to your new beginning. Who knows, you might just find your meaning of life!

Andrea Krebs, LCSW Executive Director Health Affiliates Maine 1-877-888-4304 Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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Why go to college? There’s Google.

FREE USE OF OUR SELF SERVE COMMERCIAL TRUCK WASH STATION for all new customers during the month of April We service all brands of heavy equipment, Light & Heavy Duty Trucks!

Suspension & Springs • Oil Changes Roadside Assistance • Tune Ups & More

20 Highland Spring Road, Lewiston • 333-3707 www.MaineHeavy.com May I be excused? My brain is full.

PET & OWNER OF THE MONTH My experience at Doggone Fun Doggy Daycare in Lewiston has been so positive. The staff there goes above and beyond my expectations. One day when it was raining and Moe had been running around all day in the mud, when I picked him up he was clean as could be and smelling terrific. I feel very comfortable leaving him there, and love that when he comes home he's ready to relax and wind down for the day, just like I am. I highly recommend to anyone that they bring their dog to Doggone Fun Doggy Daycare in Lewiston.

Katie Dumont & her dog Moe, a Golden Retriever-Brittany Spaniel Mix

Daycare & 24/7 Boarding Facility

528 Lincoln Street, Lewiston

786-2794 DogGoneFunDoggyDayCare.com

Merit-Ptah (2700 BC) of Ancient Egypt is the world’s first known female physician.

It takes 8,460 bolts to assemble an automobile, and one nut to scatter it all over the road.

St. Croix Forced Air Pellet Furnace

$

2495

for the month of June

Over 30

ood Products Fine W & Stove Sales

224-7239 2742 Auburn Rd. Turner, ME 04282

Out ’n About at the Poland High School Baseball Teams Annual Golf Tournament All photos by part-time Uncle Andy’s photographer, Julie Mocciola

Hey Jerry, show me that robot move you do...

(1 mile north of intersection of Rt. 4 and 219)

years experience

Adirondack Chairs

Hot Tubs

Clean Burning Technology

www.finewoodproducts.net robm@finewoodproducts.net If I’m not back in five minutes… wait longer! Ace Ventura: Pet Detective

It’s actually...

Walk like an Egyptian.

For All Your Salon & Spa Needs

Jerry Bridgham & his golf mate

336 Center St., Auburn • 777-1611

Tues. 10am-7pm • Wed.-Fri. 10am-6pm • Sat. 9am-2pm

Once the toothpaste is out of the tube, it’s hard to get it back in.

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Out ’n About at the Poland Economic Development Committee’s Business After Hours

What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?

Deb Ouellette & Lynda Carrey

Nicki & Bill Pratt

Jenny & Doug The world's oldest existing eatery opened in Kai-Feng, China in 1153.

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Smile: if you can’t lift the corners, let the middle sag.

Sorry, I can’t hangout. My uncle’s cousin’s sister in law’s best friend’s insurance agent’s roommate’s pet goldfish died. Maybe next time.

Panache is...

Cutting Edge.

Cindy

Lynn Emily & Christine, Co-owners

studio for hair, nails & massage

Michelle

Elizabeth

20 Coburn Street, Auburn

Now featuring Morrocanoil® (Off Center St., across from D’Angelos)

Kathy

Micaela

At Moroccanoil®, their passion is empowering beautiful transformations. They started with the original Moroccanoil Treatment which revolutionized the haircare industry. Moroccanoil® Antioxidant infused, nutrient rich, innovative formulas are unmatched and provide dramatic results.

Open Monday-Saturday

782-9009

www.panacheauburn.com

If you ask me anything I don’t know, I’m not going to answer. – Yogi Berra

Extreme Bedroom Makeover Park Avenue Elementary School will be able to send its entire sixth-grade class on a year-end overnight educational field trip to the YMCA Camp of Maine.

The trip was made possible by raffling off an Extreme Bedroom Makeover.

Raffle tickets were sold throughout March, and the winning ticket was drawn during an all-school assembly on March 28. The lucky winner was a firstgrader, Alivia Bergeron, who soon afterward was able to meet with the design team to describe her dream bedroom. The room makeover would take a weekend to complete, so the winner and her family spent the night at the Residence Inn in Auburn, courtesy of Ocean Properties.

Meanwhile, on Friday, April 27, the bedroom was emptied and the walls painted by Morin the Painter and volunteers using paint donated by SherwinWilliams. Two ceiling lights were donated by Lighting Concepts and installed

by Electrical Systems of Maine. On Saturday, April 28, bunk beds donated by Bedderrest were delivered and assembled, and Agren’s Appliance donated a second twin mattress. Volunteers assembled a desk donated by OfficeMax, and a desk chair was provided by Morin the Painter. Carpeting, donated by Floor Systems and bound by Dan Dube, carpetbinder, was rolled out on Sunday—the final day. Volunteers put up wall-mounted shelves donated by Lowes; and David Fields, cabinetmaker, created a custom storage unit for all those toys. Generous donations from Wal Mart, Bed Bath & Beyond, Target and Reny’s allowed for the purchase of bedding and several “finishing touches.”

On Sunday afternoon, the brand new room—a result of creative fundraising and the generosity of many volunteers and businesses—was unveiled to an astonished Alivia who said, “This is amazing. It’s so beautiful!”

AFTER

BEFORE

Alivia Bergeron, 7, was the Extreme Bedroom Makeover winner

I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day.

Tomorrow isn’t looking good, either.

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Out ’n About at the Poland Economic Development Committee’s Business After Hours Building a good bonfire is an art. I need to teach a few teenagers how it’s done...

Pessimist : A person who says that O is the last letter of ZERO, instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.

Xtreme Fit! I T NTERVAL

RAINING

Come exceed your fitness goals in 2012 Call today or log on to our website and check out our schedule, videos & more

XTREME ATHLETICS Peter Bolduc

Xtreme Fit • Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Karate • Zumba®

www.xtremeathleticsmaine.com Phone: 786-9100 If it’s sent by ship then it’s a cargo, if it’s sent by road then it’s a shipment.

Out ’n About at the Citizen of the Year Presentation John Koris

Grampa with his grandkids: Ashley, Taylor, Nick, Brenden & Ryan

Way to go Gramps!

Jean Harlow was the first actress to appear on the cover of Life magazine, May 1937.

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The shortest verse in the NIV Bible is John 11:35: “Jesus wept.”

Of course men can multi-task, they read on the toilet.

Relay for Life Androscoggin County

Out ’n About at the Poland Economic Development Committee’s Business After Hours

June 16-17, 2012 at the Edward Little High School Athletic Field in Auburn Pre-event Luminaria Fundraiser Sat., June 9 Luminarias on sale at local stores FMI 240-5488

Partial Schedule of Events: Saturday, June 16 3pm: Registration 4pm: Kick Off 4:15: Survivor/Caregiver Lap 9:30 Luminaria Ceremony Sunday, June 17 6:30 am Fighting Back Ceremony followed by last lap Other events scheduled all evening, throughout the night, until morning.

Dan Brooks

www.relayforlife.org/androscogginme • 207-431-3799 We can't always build the future for our youth, but we can build our youth for the future.

– Franklin D. Roosevelt

30th Annual Pottle Hill Road Race

Nick Knowlton

New England’s Toughest 10K on hilly, scenic, rural course

Saturday, June 23rd 10K Race • 5K Race • One-mile Run or Walk Race starts from the town square in Mechanic Falls Stick around for the many events going on throughout the day for “Community Day” in Mechanic Falls!

visit www.pathwaysmaine.com for printable registration form and more info

For more info about running, volunteering or to register:

www.pathwaysmaine.com or call 753-1457 x2202 Enthusiasm can be like a fire that needs an occasional poke with a stick.

Anne Perron World’s first travel agencies: Cox & Kings, founded in 1758, and Thomas Cook, founded in 1860.

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Out ’n About at the Poland High School Baseball Teams Annual Golf Tournament

Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you. – Uncle Andy

“Feels Like Home!”

All photos by part-time Uncle Andy’s photographer, Julie Mocciola

Two people in this picture won money... Guess who didn’t?

Pleasant Street Bingo Hall 475 Pleasant St., Lewiston • 777-1394

ONLY $10

Sandy, Coach P. & Bob the Screenprinter

Ahhhhh............

IAL C E P S

Games Pay 50 + 100 Sunday @ 6:00 pm Monday @ 6:30 pm $2 added to W.T.A.!

Tuesday @ 6:30 pm

AL I C E SP

Wednesday @ 6:30 pm $2 added to W.T.A.!

Thursday @ 6:30 pm

IAL C E P S

Friday @ 6:30 pm Half of $ goes to W.T.A.!

ALSO PLAYING HERE: LHS Music Saturdays @ 6:00 Colleen Quint Tournament committee chairperson

The hair perm was invented in 1906 by Karl Ludwig Nessler of Germany.

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Our 2012 Donations have already exceeded $5,000!

The longest book chapter in the Bible is Psalm 119, the shortest is Psalm 117.

Mokey Since Dec. 13 2010

Freud

Rio

Since Jan. 20 2012

Since Jan. 3 2012

65 Washington St., Dog Grooming Auburn, ME 04210 Daycare & Boutique (207) 333-3640 The only fully-staffed, cage-free, one-stop shop doggy daycare facility that offers 6,000 sq. ft. of climate-controlled indoor play area, and 20,000 sq. ft. of outdoor play area for small, medium and large dogs!

Est. 2008

FUN, SAFE & SUPERVISED PLAY ENVIRONMENT

thedoggzinn@gmail.com • www.facebook.com/thedoggzinn

http://thedoggzinn.googlepages.com Boutique includes full line of dog supplies & products Planet Dog • Blue Buffalo • Lupine • Red Dingo • Mason Antlers

Rhazz Since Mar. 2 2011

Dexter

Since Feb. 3 2011

Chloe H.

Since Feb. 16 2009

Out ’n About at the Poland High School Baseball Teams Annual Golf Tournament

Hydrogen gas is the least dense substance in the world.

All photos by part-time Uncle Andy’s photographer, Julie Mocciola

Hey Coach, don’t ya think it’s kinda ironic that our cart number is the same thing I always hear you yell every time we golf?

Mr. Truman (seated right) with his newest bandmates in the band Dead Season Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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A compass does not point to the geographical North or South Pole, but to the magnetic poles.

The smallest transistor is 50-nanometres wide – roughly 1/2000 the width of a human hair.

Harvey Metals

Out ’n About at Irish Twins Pub Rites of Spring Party

Superior Grading & Pricing Maine’s Largest Catalytic Converter Buyer

Family Owned & Operated

TOP PRICES PAID! We buy: Brass Copper Aluminum Wheels Radiators Batteries

Catalytic Converters

Stick your tongue out if you own Irish Twins Pub.

Cell Phones Tin And More!

Hours: Tuesday - Friday 9-4; Saturday 9-3

41 Capital Avenue, Lisbon Falls (off Rt. 196, near Rite Aid)

353-JUNK (5865) • HarveyMetals.com The very first motor car land speed record was set by Ferdinand Verbiest.

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Out ’n About at Irish Twins Pub Rites of Spring Party

Baseball’s home plate is 17 inches wide.

Nathaniel Currier, the American printmaker of Currier and Ives was born in Roxbury, Massachusetts. At the age of 15 he was apprenticed to William and John Pendleton of Boston, who had set up the first lithographic establishment in America. His apprenticeship served him well as he went on to be the largest publisher of lithographs.

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Bill Klem served the most seasons as major league umpire – 37 years, starting in 1905. He also officiated 18 World Series.

Out ’n About at the Poland High School Baseball Teams Annual Golf Tournament

Air becomes liquid at about -310º Fahrenheit.

Earn

10% MORE with any amount of bottles with this coupon!

Dad’s are pretty cool guys so we’re giving away 10% more money for your returnables this month!

All photos by part-time Uncle Andy’s photographer, Julie Mocciola

Expires 6.30.12

Mechanic Falls Redemption 20 Maple Street • Mechanic Falls 345-3765 • Open 7 days 9am-5pm

Jed Quint & Pat Summers

Richard Conway, owner

Ferenc Szisz from Romania, driving a Renault, won the first Formula One Grand Prix held at Le Mans, France in 1906.

would like to wish congratulations

to all area graduates!

Get your graduate a gift card for any of our professional services.

Ann Dumais

Kelly Giambra

Sue Poulin

Kim Galgovitch

Lisa Olmstead

Pauline Guimond

14 Highland Spring Plaza, Suite A Highland Spring Road, Lewiston

786-4311

Lysa Ronan

Valerie Kelshaw

Jacinta Labbe

We are a full service salon

Get Your Hair Done Before Work!

We’re open at 6:00am 4 days a week!!

Hours: Tues. Wed. & Thu. 6am - 8pm Fri. 6am - 3pm • Sat. 8am - 1pm

The record for the most NASCAR wins is held by Richard Petty: 200 wins (and 7 championships).

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The thin line of cloud that forms behind an aircraft at high altitudes is called a contrail.

indham •

Located

orth W . 115 in N

0

892-822

on Rt

Sound travels through water 3 times faster than through air.

Prescription Sunglasses!!

FREREOTTECITNIOTN

Starting at

& UV P

$

59

Before the enactment of the 1978 law that made it mandatory for dog owners in New York City to clean up after their pets, approximately 40 million pounds of dog excrement were deposited on the streets every year.

Sugar plays more roles in jams and jellies than just sweetening the fruit. Sugar helps to preserve the fruit in jams and jellies from its ability to "tie up" water in the mixture and inhibit the growth of microorganisms and bacteria.

It was reported that director James Cameron desperately wanted O. J. Simpson to play the title role of the killer humanoid alien in the first Terminator film in the 1980s. Cameron held out to the very end, but ended up being "stuck" with then little-known Arnold Schwarzenegger.

The 22nd Amendment

Complete Frame & Lens Accepting most major insurances

Not to be combined with any other offer. See associate for details. Offer exp. 6/30/2012

120 Center Street Plaza, Auburn Vision at a Value Search VIPEyes Auburn

Mon - Fri 9:30 AM - 6:00 PM Sat 10 AM - 3:00 PM

783-4226

The word “biology” was coined in 1805 by Jean-Baptiste Lamarck.

The 22nd Amendment to the U.S. Constitution was ratified in 1951.

This amendment limits U.S. presidents to two terms in office. FYI, Franklin D. Roosevelt was the only President to have served more than two terms.

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Out ’n About at Irish Twins Pub Rites of Spring Party

A soccer ball is made up of 32 leather panels, held together by 642 stitches.

Willow Run Dental Association

“Beginning Traditions”

Nice coozie huh, Geno?

n Dent Ru

• Family cosmetic dentistry • Emergency same-day care • Most insurance plans accepted

soc.

As al

I think I’ve got some food stuck on my cheek...

Now accepting new patients

Willo w

Geraldine Schneider, DMD Scott Beckerman, DMD Jeffrey Sloan, DDS

From Biddeford to Bangor... we can show you any listing you desire!

Give us a call to sell your home and to view any property in Maine.

Brian & Tracie Vye 207.713.1618

Legacy Realty 681 Sabattus St, Lewiston 207.376.4830 Email: Brian-Tracie@Legacy-Realty.net

Call us today for a no obligation consultation to see if we can help you do business better!

RCC Business Services, Inc. Financial & Advisory Services for Small Businesses 143 First Flight Drive, Auburn • 795-0663 www.RCCmaine.com

& Jimbo

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One Willow Run Unit 1-B Auburn, ME

Tired of renting?

Outgrowing your home?

Ready for a change?

Let us do what we do BEST So you can do what you do BEST

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis

783-0261

 QuickBooks Consulting  QuickBooks Hosting  Bookkeeping  MaineCare Billing  Accounts Receivable Management  Financial Reporting

Proadvisors, for confidence Certified Staff, for training Hosting, for virtual support

A scientific satellite needs only 250 watts of power, the equivalent used by two hour light bulbs, to operate.

Behavior Modification Reinforcers

Water expands by about 9% as it freezes.

RV DUMP STATION 747 Minot Ave. Auburn (behind Fastenal)

OPEN 24/7 SELF SERVE

The HMO account manager noticed that nearly every bill from a certain pediatrician’s office included the line item “Behavior modification reinforcers.”

Alarmed that the pediatrician was engaging in some unapproved, experimental psychological treatment, she called the physician’s office to inquire, “What on earth are behavior modification reinforcers?”

“Lollipops,” was the reply.

Zaire is the world leader in cobalt mining.

Now Accepting New Patients Kevin M. Connelly, D.M.D. COMPREHENSIVE FAMILY DENTAL CARE IN A RELAXING, COMFORTABLE ATMOSPHERE

1065 Lisbon Street, Lewiston 376-4977 www.kevinconnellydmd.com

NOW LEASING - Healy Terrace 81 Ash Street, Lewiston Spacious, contemporary 1 and 2 bedroom units in newly renovated historic building. Elderly 55 plus, non-smoking, Section 8 assisted, elevator, laundry, free parking on site. Fully applianced, heat, hot water, wireless internet included. Accessible units available.

Apply at Lewiston Housing Authority 1 College Street, Lewiston

207-783-1423 8:00am - 5:00pm, Monday - Friday

A baseball ball has exactly 108 stitches, a cricket ball has between 65 and 70 stitches.

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Out ’n About at the Poland Economic Development Committee’s Business After Hours

About 42,000 tennis balls are used in the plus-minus 650 matches in the Wimbledon Championship.

SAVE GAS - RIDE A GOLF CART • Campers • Senior Citizens • Campground and RV Owners • Free Delivery - 40 mile radius • Conversion Lift Kits • 4 passenger cars

HUGE SALE

497 Washington St. Auburn • 783-3232 Out ’n About at Irish Twins Pub Rites of Spring Party

PunkRope with SIMPLICITY (Local

Pat Poland Post Office

ZUMBA Gold Session ideal for Alternative band from Topsham) - Total beginners, older active adults & those Body Conditioning Workreturning from injury out set to LOCAL music!

Thursdays Tuesdays 6:30pm & 6:30pm at Thursdays 5:30pm at SPRQ Sabattus SPRQ Sabattus Stephanie Dustin, Instructor Darci LaPierre-Brown, Instructor

5 WEEK SESSIONS June 7th - July 5th Session-Only punch cards available for just $35

Louise Robinson School Nurse Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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View class calendar & upcoming session details online at

SPRQstudio.com

754-9411

Primary Location: 20 Main Street, Sabattus (2nd floor) F I T N E S S Classes offered in Sabattus, Lisbon Falls, Poland, Minot & Topsham. Fun for the whole family!

More than 100 million people hold hunting licenses.

The Space Shuttle always rolls over after launch to alleviate structural loading, allowing the shuttle to carry more mass into orbit.

We’re relocating by August 1st, but until then we’ll still be at our current location.

Out ’n About at Irish Twins Pub Rites of Spring Party

600 Center Street Back l to r: Kellyann, Terry, Michael, Linda & Nuria Front l to r: Cory, Tina Kelly & Kathy

Shaw’s Plaza in Auburn 788-0112

by August 1st • (Next to Dunkin Donuts) Half the world’s population is under 25 years of age. 10% are over 60 years of age.

www.abcpool.com

Your kids will always have “Something to do” on those hot summer days. And because your ABC Pool is virtually maintenance free you’ll enjoy it even more.

We offer a full line of above ground pools with a price that’s right for any budget.

John was the only apostle who witnessed the crucifixion of Jesus.

After God created the world, He made man and woman. Then, to keep the whole thing from collapsing, He invented humor.

– Bill Kelly There are no letters assigned to the numbers 1 and 0 on a phone keypad. These numbers remain unassigned because they are so-called “flag” numbers, kept for special purposes such as emergency or operator services.

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NEXT Level Business Coaching Go Home On Time – Sleep Well At Night

What is business coaching?

Call 207-376-3239 for a confidential 90 minute consultation on any two business issues you are facing – no charge.

Guaranteed to provide you with strategies you can put to use right away.

The 12 disciples were not were not allowed to carry food, money, or extra clothing.

Community Days in McFalls June 22 & 23 Everyone is welcome!

Sheila, Nicole, Angie, Ally

Customer Appreciation means great product discounts all day!

SHEILA’S HAIR SALON

50% OFF All Spray Cuts both Men & Women

June 22-23 only

345-3819

The banquet was about to begin when the master of ceremonies was informed that the clergyman invited to give the blessing was unable to attend. He asked the main speaker if he would oblige, and the man agreed. He began, "There is no clergyman present, let us thank God." The very first projection of an image on a screen was made by a German priest. In 1646, Athanasius Kircher used a candle or oil lamp to project hand-painted images onto a white screen.

Hours: Tues. - Fri. 9am-7pm • Sat. 9-2

5 South Main Street, Mechanic Falls

The Bible was written in three languages: Hebrew, Aramaic, and Koine Greek.

I just love to dance to the music, the shades make me incognito. No one will ever know...

A father was reading Bible stories to his young son. He read: "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city but his wife looked back and was turned to salt." His son asked: "What happened to the flea?"

Humor is the great thing, the saving thing.

The minute it crops up, all our irritation and resentments slip away, and a sunny spirit takes their place. ~Mark Twain

Alan Lothrop with his son, Sam Lothrop with the crowd at an Auburn Community Band summer concert series Submitted by Lise Lothrop

Dogs are mentioned 14 times in the Bible, and lions 55 times, but domestic cats are not mentioned at all.

Utility is when you have one telephone, luxury is when you have two, and paradise is when you have none.

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Out ’n About at the Citizen of the Year Presentation

The very first Olympic race, held in 776 BC, was won by Corubus, a chef.

Thanks to Bart Kelsea I can now say that I can fold a flag!

Bart Kelsea & Hillary Dow

J.R. Hemenway & Denise D’amboise

1 mile south of Oxford Plains Speedway

596 Main Street, Oxford Denny Breau with his number one fan

207-539-8811 www.maine-lyaction.com

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The record for the most major league baseball career innings is held by Cy Young, with 7,356 innings.

The world’s average school year is 200 days per year. In the US, it is 180 days; in Sweden 170 days, in Japan it is 243 days.

The Agency Assisting families since 1997 Assisted Home Care is a registered home health services agency that provides:

Steve, thank you for being so helpful! Picking my lumber for that swing set was a daunting task until you showed up. You’re my favorite Home Depot employee!

• Registered Nurse • Licensed Practical Nurse • Certified Nurses Aides • Certified Medical Technicians • Certified Residential Medication Aides • Personal Care Assistants Our highly qualified and experienced staff are supervised by a Registered Nurse.

The Family We see ourselves as a family - a family that wants to assist you and your family with:

Once the call has been made, we can provide services in as little as 4 hours.

Home C d e t ar sis s e A 550 College St., Lewiston

• Personal Care • Medication Reminders • Meal Preparation • Feeding • Light Housekeeping • Laundry • Errands • Companionship • Respite Care

783-7375

In your time of need.

We cover Gray, New Gloucester, Turner, Augusta, Windham, Brunswick, Topsham, Bath, Mechanic Falls, Norway, Bowdoinham, Pownal and surrounding areas.

Now Hiring CNA’s

NEW CERAMIC PRO 100% ACRYLIC HOUSE PAINT

Steve Rioux gets a big hug from Abigail while shopping at Home Depot

4 Year Celebration

Steve Rioux & Darcy Pabst

ON SALE NOW! Superior Value!

Competitive Price!

Formulated with an advanced acrylic resin emulsion, Ceramic Pro provides the painted surface with long-lasting protection. Available in Lo-Sheen and Soft Gloss finishes.

516 Sabattus St., Lewiston

784-1993 www.lewistonpaint.com M-F 7am-5pm • Sat 7:30am - 1pm

People laugh because I'm different, I laugh because they're all the same.

are celebrating 4 years together on June 13th Be sure to wish them a happy anniversary!

People are made to be loved and things are made to be used.

There is much chaos in this world because things are being loved and people are being used.

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Out ’n About at the Citizen of the Year Presentation

A closed mind is like a closed book; just a block of wood. – Chinese proverb

FROM STONE DUST TO ROC Cindy Austin & Debra Danforth

St. Laurent & Son is pleased to announce the acquisition of the former Glen Dube Gra located less than a half mile from the Maine Turnpike. The gravel pit now has a la Pick up and delivery are availa

I’ve contemplated many times about writing for Uncle Andy’s Digest... they just won’t pay me anything for my fantabulous writing ability.

Locally owned and operated since 1970!

Jim Wellehan & Mark LaFlamme

NOW ACCEPTING EMPLOYMENT APPLICATIONS

How you doin’?

20 Highland Spring Road, Lewiston

784-7944

www.stlaurentandson.com Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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There's a book that tells you where you should go on your vacation.

It's called your checkbook.

Who says nothing is impossible. I've been doing nothing for years. – Uncle Andy

CK, WE HAVE IT IN STOCK!

avel Pit located at 168 Middle Road (Rt. 9) in Sabattus. The gravel pit is conveniently arge scale crushing/processing operation and offers a wide variety of aggregates. able. Call our office for pricing.

Out ’n About at the Citizen of the Year Presentation I love titles.

Title insurance. Title searches. I think I’m enTITLEd to think that way, don’t you?

Bart Kelsea Androscoggin Title Co.

Paul LeCombe LAEGC I hope this ends up in Uncle Andy’s Digest...

Dick Kendall A signature always reveals a man's character - and sometimes even his name.

– Evan Esar

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Out ’n About at L-A Harley Davidson’s Black & Orange Weekend

Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious. – Peter Ustinov

Kids Day

Whether it’s Stick, Modular or Mobile, Rainbow will create a Mortgage package that will work for you!

I really wanted the Harley logo... but dolphins are nice too I guess.

Dizzy Lizzy & Emily

✓ FHA ✓ VA ✓MSHA Main, Rainbow FCU Office 381-391 Main St. Lewiston 207-784-5435 Fax: 207-795-6238

Mechanic Falls Branch 1 Lewiston Street, McFalls 207-346-3001 Fax: 207-346-3012

✓Bi-Weekly Payments

South Paris Branch 172 Pine Street, So. Paris 207-743-5410 Fax: 207-743-9331

Auburn Office 20 Washington St., Auburn 207-783-0351 Fax: 207-786-0523

Humor is a reminder that no matter how high the throne one sits on, one sits on one's bottom. – Taki

Your Concept...

...Our Design

Isabella, Misty & Kadyn I wonder if the boss man would upgrade this to a Harley Trike?

10’x12’ Oak Kitchen with countertop $1,99999 10’x12’ Birch Kitchen with countertop $2,09999 1766 Federal Rd. (Rt. 4) Livermore

897-3400 or 1822 Lisbon Rd., Lewiston

784-3100 McDonalds UP Team Mobile

www.KitchenSolutionsMaine.com

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis

Maybe this world is another planet's hell. – Aldous Huxley

& Jimbo

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WITHOUT A PROFESSIONAL

WEBSITE YOU HAVE NO BUSINESS

COMMERCIAL WEB DESIGN SINCE 1993 www.CoreZero.com 207-212-2432

Out ’n About at the Citizen of the Year Presentation

If you teach your children nothing else, teach them the Golden Rule and "righty-tighty, lefty-loosey." – Robert Brault

Here we are...

Caught in the middle of an out ’n about for UAD.

TCT

Sharon Lagasse & Laurie Steele

Debra Danforth

Murphy was an optimist.

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The large print giveth, but the small print taketh away. –Tom Waits

Going Down?

A dog who attends a flea circus most likely will steal the whole show.

New Homes Sun Rooms Garages Call us for your FREE quote!

“The Difference is in the Details”

Best prices with the highest quality workmanship.

Call 753-9887 or 576-8528

OVER 20 YEARS OF BUILDING EXPERIENCE Fully Insured • Many References Available

If The Phone Doesn't Ring, It's Me. – Song title by Jimmy Buffet

Out ’n About at the Poland HS 2012 Prom

Is it time for a new driveway?

In 1857, Elisha Otis installed the first passenger elevator in the five-story E.V. Haughwout Building in New York City. While elevators had been used prior to this time, they weren't used for passengers until Otis invented a device to prevent the elevator from falling if the cable broke. The original elevator is still in place and is in working condition. Now that's quality work!

WE CAN HELP!

Commercial • Residential • Industrial We also offer:

Asphalt Repair • Asphalt Removal Driveway Sealing • Concrete Parking Lot Paving • And More!

Call us today for your FREE quote!

Superior Paving Company The Gibson Family: Hunter, Daryl, Amanda, Kathy & Emily Don't ask God to guide your footsteps if you're not willing to move your feet.

782-4010 Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

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Out ’n About at the Citizen of the Year Presentation I want everyone in this column to take a look at the ads to the right...

Have you ever noticed how the contents of a box are much more interesting before the box is opened?

June Is:

Proms Recitals Weddings Graduations Father s Day

We’ve got you covered!

Ann’s Flowers 14 Millett Drive, Auburn 782-3457 www.annsflower.com

Oh nice!

Peter Bunker

LOOKING FOR SOMEONE TO CREATE THE PERFECT HOME FOR YOUR FAMILY? Who: • Can transform your dream home into reality? • Has over 30 years experience in building design?

• Specializes in custom home plans from ideas or sketches that you provide?

• Can help you plan the best way to remodel the home you live in for space, cost & energy savings?

Whether it’s designing a new home or an addition to your existing home, we can make the process a whole lot easier for you by having your ideas put on paper and fully refined before construction begins. Give us a call or visit our website for more information.

Yes, I agree, beautiful ads.

Residential Commercial Energy Star

Wisdom will keep you from getting into situations where you need it.

– Bruce M. Sandbrook Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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190 Eddie Kahkonen Road, Norway • 739.0673 • www.HarlowHomeDesign.com

If I never had a bad day, how would I know whether I was having a good day?

Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn't have to hear about the way his mother cooked.

Come to Oxford’s only original indoor flea market!

Open 7 days a week year-round for your shopping!

Collectibles • Coins • Glassware • Sports Cards • Furniture • BEANIE BABIES Advertising Items • Jewelry • Cassettes • DVDs • CD’s • Videos • Antiques & Lots More!

VISIT

“THE BOOK NOOK” Regular Paperbacks $1/each $

3.50 each for most Hardcover Books

Selective Hard Covers $2

20% OFF all Audio Books (books on tape & CD) Over 55,000 Pre-Read Books & Cookbooks

Kurk, hiring you as my business coach was a great decision. We go together like cheese and crackers...

Large Selection of Fenton Glassware!

Dave Johnson & Kurk Lalemand

INVENTORY REDUCTION

SALE! 20% - 75% OFF

Pre-Read Books arriving daily

Out ’n About at the Citizen of the Year Presentation

Eva LaDoucer

Featuring

131Vendors Open 7 Days a Week

9 AM - 5 PM We honor: M/C, DEBIT, ATM, VISA, Am. Express & Discover cards

960 Main Street, Oxford • 539-4149 500 feet North of the New Balance Factory Outlet Store

Largest Indoor Flea Market in the Area!

There is a certain freedom in having nothing left to lose.

s Alway g n i Buy

Joyce Higgins The longest line in the Bible is Esther 8:9 – 89 words, 425 letters.

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Out ’n About at the Citizen of the Year Presentation

The oldest inhabited city is Damascus, Syria.

Bill Higgins

Here he comes...

Elaine Hemenway Ahhhhh....

Say what? I’m the what??

Gary & Elaine Hemenway

UNCLE ANDY’S DIGEST

as he hears for the first time he is citizen of the year Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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The pin that holds a hinge together is called a pintle.

In 1913, the Russian Airline became the first to introduce a toilet on board.

Give your father the gift he deserves!

Out ’n About at the Citizen of the Year Presentation SURPRISE!!!

Send your special man alone or join him for all services side by side.

Gary’s granddaughters,

Taylor & Ashley

✦ Full Body Massage ✦ Hot Stone Massage ✦ Herbal (Detox) Body Wrap ✦ Customized Facial ✦ Gentleman’s Pedicure

Gift cards are always available

www.cassiels.com 71 EAST AVENUE • LEWISTON, MAINE

(207) 783-3321 A fathom is 6 feet.

Grampa & Nick Gary gets a hug from his grandson Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

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In 1894 Thomas Edison and W K L Dickson introduced the first film camera.

PAVING & SEALCOATING

Out ’n About at the Citizen of the Year Presentation

Residential & Commercial Call for FREE Estimates

MELANSON CONSTRUCTION, I NC.

Paul Morlock

84 No Name Pond Road, Lewiston • 784-5899

WEBSTER’S TRADING CO. BUY • SELL • TRADE • PAWN

NEED A LOAN?

We’ll buy, trade, pawn your gun collection!

HUGE SELECTION

OF GUNS Stop in – Let’s talk!! 150 Minot Ave, Auburn • 795-6402

www.websterstradingcompany.com

It’s Driveway Season Get it Done and get it DONE RIGHT Draining • General Excavation DI GI • Septic Systems • Affordable & Dependable T! CHENARD EXCAVATION Call Gerry 576-3914 Air-filled tires were used on bicycles before they were used on automobiles.

Denny Breau

Adam Dow Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

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Out ’n About at the Citizen of the Year Presentation

The first diet soft drink, called the "No-Cal Beverage" was launched in 1952.

A Maine Tradition You Can Count On! DAILY SPECIALS Monday - 2 Crabmeat Rolls . . . . . . . . .$8.95 w/salad & chips

Tues. Wed. & Thurs.

Fried Clams - sm. $11.75 . . . .lg. $15.25 w/potato & choice of salad or cole slaw

Tuesday - Yankee Pot Roast . . . . . . . . .$7.95 A representative of Mike Michaud awards Gary

w/potato, carrots, gravy & rolls

Friday & Saturday

Wednesday - Chicken Pot Pie . . . . . . . .$6.95

After 4:00 PM Prime Rib Au Jus*

Thursday - 2 Lobster Rolls . . . . . . . . . . . .$13.95

w/potato & rolls w/ salad & chips

Small $13.50 • Large $16.25

Friday, Saturday & Sunday

I eat here nearly every day. I love the muffins for my breakfast and daily specials at lunch time. My favorite thing, though, is the people I see here.

Fried Haddock* $11.65 Baked Stuffed Haddock* Small $10.25 • Large $13.95

Fried Seafood Combo* $16.95 A representative of Susan Collins awards Gary

Grilled Salmon $11.25 includes Potato, Choice of Salad or Coleslaw *with Potato, Choice of Salad, Coleslaw or Vegetable & Rolls

Robert Ryan

Hours: Sunday-Thursday 6am – 9pm; Friday & Saturday 6am – 9:30pm

of Mechanic Falls

64 Lewiston Road, Gray • 657-4714 • www.ColeFarms.com JUST ONE MILE NORTH OFF EXIT 63 OF MAINE TURNPIKE

A representative of Olympia Snowe awards Gary

DO YOU LOVE THE DIGEST? Do you have a family member living away who also loves it?

Buy yourself or them a subscription to Uncle Andy’s Digest!

Auburn Jason Labonte gives Gary the key to the city Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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Only $30 for the whole year (12 editions).

We’ll mail it directly to their residence each and every month! Perfect any time of the year...

Birthday, Anniversary, Christmas or just because!

Give us a call!

Count Alessandro Volta invented the first battery in the 18th century.

Joseph Niepce developed the world's first photographic image in 1827.

Out ’n About at the Citizen of the Year Presentation

John Lefevre

Tom Emery

Ryan Hemenway speaks about his Grampa

345-2091

Uncle Andy’s Digest, PO Box 3363, Auburn, ME 04212 • (207) 783-7039 During the 1860s, George Leclanche developed the dry-cell battery, the basis for modern batteries.

Chris Hemenway embraces his father Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

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Out ’n About at L-A Harley Davidson’s Black & Orange Weekend Kids Day

Botanically speaking, the banana is a herb and the tomato is a fruit.

• Income Tax Returns • Payroll Taxes

• Sales & Use Tax • Accounting Systems

CCURATE CCOUNTING & Tax Services, P.A. 922 Sabattus Street Lewiston • 777-7005 (Corner of Sabattus & Garcelon Streets - Across from Val’s Rootbeer)

CHECK OUT OUR STORE ON YOUR WAY TO THE COAST Womans & Childrens pre-loved clothing

Vintage Clothing • China • Crystal Pottery • Collectibles & Much More!

Maine Vintage & Consignment Quality Clothing & Home Goods Any event at L-A Harley is sure to put a smile on your face. There’s something going on here every weekend!

353-2216 Just off Rt. 196 @ 18 Main Street in Lisbon Falls Wed-Fri 12pm - 5pm • Sat 10am - 4pm

ANDROSCOGGIN TITLE COMPANY 95 MAIN STREET • AUBURN, MAINE 04210 Title Insurance • Title Searches • Real Estate Closings

Bart Kelsea, President (207) 784-6413

Kevin Mitchell of McDonald's Up Team Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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The band Duran Duran took their name from a mad scientist in the movie Barbarella.

Sarah Jeanne’s

Your Prom g & Weddin ters!

Headquar

Tanning & Day Spa

Family Hair Care

• Updos • Hair Services • Manicures • Pedicures • Hot Tub • Sauna • Massage • Tanning • Body Waxing • Body Wraps • Facials • Eyelashes • Limos • Tuxedos • And More!

77 Sabattus Street, Lewiston • www.sarahjeannes.com

795-6778

TUXEDO RENTALS

at a price you can afford!

L/A’s Greater oice Best Ch s! x u for T e

Fabulous selection of tuxedo styles including vests, ties, shoes, shirts and pants.

• Weddings • Proms • Formal Events Check us out first for your next tux rental!

Chin & Neck

Tummy

Back

Upper Legs

Sides

Arms

Tightens, Tones & Firms - Get the sexy body you deserve!

Look Years Younger with hydrated, smoother skin!

Reduces appearance of cellulite!

CALL US AT 795-6778 TO LEARN MORE Host a Party & Try It

S&J Tuxedos And Limo Service (Affiliated with Sarah Jeanne’s)

76 Sabattus Street, Lewiston

333-3737

FREE with coupon (call for details)

Out ’n About at the Citizen of the Year Presentation

All road signs south of Tucson, Arizona are in the Metric System.

Peter Murphy President of the Auburn Business Association awards Gary

Honey, I love you so much I could kiss you...

The real name of The Jetsons' dog Astro is Tralfaz.

CALL FOR YOUR NEW OR REFINANCED AUTO LOAN Low Rates ✥ Fast Approvals ✥ Extended Terms

Call Us Today!

Great Falls Federal Credit Union 34 Bates Street, Lewiston • 782-7192 760 Minot Avenue, Auburn • 753-0500 www.greatfallsfcu.com Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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*Restrictions & qualification apply

Starfish don't have brains.

The word “Christian” appears only three times in the Bible: Acts 11:26; 26:28; 1 Peter 4:16.

Great Office Space Available for Rent

Out ’n About at the Poland HS 2012 Prom For free tickets to next years prom, who are we?

They’ll never guess that is Nate Morin above us...

900 SQUARE FEET OF PRIME OFFICE SPACE FOR RENT (An additional 400 square foot 3rd floor also available if necessary).

This second floor office space is perfect for any business needing professional office space. It has 3 separate offices with waiting area, private full bath and full kitchen. Hardwood floors throughout.

EVERYTHING INCLUDED IN RENT: Heat, hot water, sewer, electricity, internet, plowing, trash removal & off-street parking. Signage space also available.

Located at 9 Grove Street in Auburn.

Across from Pat’s Pizza on Center Street.

This prime office space is available NOW! Call Jim at 576-4844 FMI or to set up a viewing.

There are 66 books in the Bible, 39 in the Old Testament and 27 in the New Testament.

Paxton Arsenault, Courtney Marston, Paige Brousseau & Amanda Gibson Mt. Vernon Washington grows more tulips than the entire country of Holland.

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

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Out ’n About at L-A Harley Davidson’s Black & Orange Weekend Kids Day

The longest word in the Bible is Maher-shalal-hash-baz: Isaiah 8:1.

Need it gone?

WE DO THAT! Construction Site Waste • Apartment Building Clean outs • Rental Property Clean outs Old Junk • Old furniture • Old appliances • And More!

Darlene Moore & Brooke Mclaughlin

We have the technology and the manpower to take care of your clean out project affordably and efficiently. Call H.I. Rick for a FREE quote for your clean out!

H.I. Rick

I’m Blake and I know it.

Blake & Kathy Dow For All General Home Repairs & Improvements

HOME IMPROVEMENT SERVICES Carpentry • Plumbing • Flooring • Painting Plowing & much more!

Call us today for a FREE quote!

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?

Spongebob Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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out about Call today to find l! our Spring Specia

784-8922

I never knew what an engineer did for a living when I was a kid. I still don’t.

– Scott Adams

It is a misdemeanor to kill or threaten a butterfly in some towns in California.

This Month’s Specials

Large 16” 1-Topping 12 pc. Roadies Fresh Dough Pizza Chicken Tender Snack $12.19 $9.99

FREE* 16 oz. Pepsi or Coke Product with purchase of any large sub!! *sales tax & deposit not included

Maine Seasonal Pest Control Andrew Ferguson Master Applicator

346-1678

June is get rid of ants month!

Uncle Andy says it’s time to pray I mean spray for bugs!

S A N I PLUS FOR YOUR CELLAR

No Need for Chiseling or Building Up a Floor Base

The S A N I PLUS is the answer for most toilet and bathroom situations.

It can be installed up to 15 feet below the sewer level and/or 150 feet away from a soil stack. The S A N I PLUS is simple to install, pumps away waste water from a toilet, hand basin, bathtub and shower, and is connected to a low consumption toilet.

MESeasonalPest@aol.com Lic # CMA44691/7A7B7E

HARRIS BROTHERS PO Box 2002 • Norway, Maine 04268

Call us!

No Separating Required!

1525 Lisbon Street Lewiston ME, 04240 783-6927 • 1-800-834-5706 Fax: 783-2873 Mon-Fri 7:30-5:30 • Sat. 8-4 ADD A NEW BATHROOM

743-3891 HARRIS BROS.

FOUR SEASON SERVICE

Downeast Sharpening Sales & Service of Outdoor Power Equipment Complete Sharpening Service Glen A. Gisel

SERVING: NORWAY • WEST PARIS MINOT • MCFALLS • OXFORD

7 Main St. (Junction of Rt. 302 & 121) Raymond

DOLMAR

shindaiwa

655-4635

www.downeastsharpening.com

DOG BOXES FOR YOUR VEHICLE! Custom made to fit your needs.

EXCEPTIONAL ENERGY! EXCEPTIONAL SERVICE! Thinking of converting? Call us now to arrange for a FREE Estimate and Tank Set! Phone: (207) 225-3000 • Toll-Free: (800) 491-7888

www.murrayoil.com • murray@murrayoil.com

Visit us on Facebook to see many custom-built dog boxes.

Great for Hunters – Guides – & more

www.tailfeathersuplandstore.com 1311 Roosevelt Trail (Rt. 302) • Raymond • 655-1030

The word "hangnail" comes from Middle English: ang- (painful) + nail.

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Ask for Don or Debbie for all your towing needs

940 Washington St. • Auburn • 784-4619

Call us if you are broken down.

We now offer Roadside Assistance, such as tire changes and lockouts.

We carry 60 new Interstate batteries, air compressor, and tools to fix small problems.

Don’s DBA...

MORRIS AUTO PARTS 940 Washington St. North • 784-7374 or 800-730-7374 • Mon. - Fri. 8 - 5 • Sat. 8 - 12 RE-USE

LE

Charlie Rollins III & IV & Gail Palmer

C CY RE

RE DU C E

Dacyn, Mike & Brody

DON’S NO PREFERENCE TOWING CO.

One coupon per customer

Dad, can we get our own Harley’s?

SAVE $$ SAVE $$ SAVE $$ SAVE $$ SAVE $$ SAVE $$ SAVE $$ SAVE $$

Kids Day

Louis IV of France had a stomach the size of two regular stomachs.

Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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OFF

In-stock auto & truck parts

TOGETHER LET’S THINK GREEN AND RECYCLE!

SAVE $$ SAVE $$ SAVE $$ SAVE $$

You'll Laugh Katie & Tom Arsenault

15

%

SAVE $$ SAVE $$ SAVE $$ SAVE $$

Out ’n About at L-A Harley Davidson’s Black & Orange Weekend

You'll Learn

With lots of humor, Imus is joined by Imus asks tough questions of celebrities, politicians Warner, Bernie, Lou and Dagen. and media stars and they still come back for more.

Add comedians Tony Powell and Rob Combine that with our award winning local news Bartlett, starting your day is more fun. and your mornings are complete.

L-A’s

WEZR RADIO

1240

Listen to AM 1240 weekdays 6 to 10 AM

Spiral staircases in medieval castles rung clockwise because all knights used to be right-handed.

➢ UNCLE ANDY’S CLASSIFIED ADS ➢ Automotive Mike Morin’s Auto Center Free shuttle with all repair work 1122 Center Street, Auburn 753-0433

Construction Timber-Built Construction New home construction, Sunrooms, Garages 753-9887 or 576-8528

Armand’s Autobody Free Estimates Satisfaction Guarantee Call Dan Dumont @ 782-7113

St. Laurent & Sons

Emerson Toyota Your next vehicle is here!

990 Center Street, Auburn 784-1348

Call 784-7944 or order online at stlaurentandson.com 20 Highland Spring Road, Lewiston

Sound Effects Car audio & remote starters 216 Center St, Auburn 777-3339 Independent Auto Sales High quality cars & trucks 1298 Sabattus Street, Lewiston IndependentAuto.com

Stone Dust to Rock, we have it in stock!

We Deliver.

Remodeling

Donovan’s Auto Sales 50 vehicles in stock Rt. 202, Greene, 753-0433 Donovansauto.com

Employment

900 Sq. Ft. of Prime Office Space For Rent

Experienced Barber or Stylist Opening at Hair 2000 in Lewiston Call Kim at 783-7373

This second floor office space is perfect for a professional office setting. It has 3 separate offices with waiting area, private full bath and full kitchen.

Hardwood floors throughout.

EVERYTHING IS INCLUDED IN YOUR RENT: Heat, hot water, sewer, electricity, internet, plowing, trash removal & off-street parking for you and your clients.

Kitchen Solutions 10’ x 12’ Oak Kitchen with countertop only $1,999.

Call 897-3400 FMI

Countertops, Etc Lake City Exports L/A’s premiere pre-owned lot 867 Center Street, Auburn 753-0033

For Rent

Custom built cabinets adds value!

Affordable solid surface & cabinet.

Let me help save you $$$.

Over 100 referrals available.

212-3203

Located on Grove Street in Auburn, right off Center Street.

Call Jim at 576-4844 FMI or to set up a viewing. See page 97 to see photos of office space.

Trash Outs Home Improvement Services Need it gone - call us today 784-8922

TOM’S AUTO PARTS Large selection of new and used auto parts. Call for your needs. Shipping available in USA. Call 375-4475.

Auto Core Pick-up Highest prices paid... PERIOD! Batteries, Aluminum rims, Catalytic converters, Starters, Alternators, Radiators & MORE! Call me today, I’ll come pick it up and pay you on the spot!

240-8798

Did You Know?

Running a display ad along with a classified doubles your exposure and makes the average number of impressions necessary to be successful happen at a quicker pace?

Uncle Andy’s Digest

HAIR 2000

Urban Edge Hair Studio Stylist needed for booth rental Established clientele preferred Call Linda @ 784-3522

General Have you liked us on Facebook yet?

“LIKE” Uncle Andy’s Digest on Facebook to hear about upcoming events, promotions, giveaways and even get a chuckle from one of our jokes or one-liners!

Scan the QR Code below or find us on facebook @ facebook.com/ UncleAndysDigest

Classified advertising

It doesn’t get any more affordable!

Call us today for more info @ 783-7039 or email: editor@UncleAndys.com

M&M's stands for the last names of Forrest Mars, Sr and his associate Bruce Murrie.

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Out ’n About at L-A Harley Davidson’s Black & Orange Weekend

Table tennis balls have been known to travel off the paddle at speeds up to 105.6 miles per hour.

Kids Day You and your family are part of our extended L-A Harley family!

Chantel, Averi & Chad Raymond From this...

...to this in 2.5 seconds. Pretty twisted, huh?

Jeremy Remian's Twisted Entertainment Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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A rhinoceros's horn is made of the same substance as hair is made.

Out ’n About at L-A Harley Davidson’s Black & Orange Weekend

The Phillips-head screwdriver was invented in Oregon.

Kids Day

Glenda Mitchell (showroom consultant) and Tim Fox (showroom manager)

Make an appointment with our showroom consultants to get easy access to a “World of Choices,” ideas and advantages.

Partnering with Professionals

Riley, Sam & Isaiah

Redlon & Johnson is a wholesale company and does not sell retail Showroom Hours: Mon., Tues., Wed., Fri. 8AM - 4:30PM

784-5721 3 Middle Street, Lewiston

Open Thurs. until 6PM APPOINTMENTS RECOMMENDED

Juggling is always an UP and down kinda thing... mostly UP today though.

The Bronx, New York got its name from explorer Henry Bronk.

Graduation & Father’s Day Gifts We have what you’re looking for Watch Batteries Replaced Watch Bands Ring Sizings Stone Setting Clasp Replacement Bead Stringing Appraisals Eyeglass Repair

Stop in and see!

Mindy

Brian & Shane Miclon

1600 Main St. Rt 26 in Oxford • 739-2300 Mon-Fri 9-5; Sat. 9-3 • diamondcutjewelers.com

A bear has 42 teeth.

Tanya

of The McDonald's UP Team Uncle Andy’s Digest ...withravis &T Jimbo

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JUNE SPECIAL HEADLIGHT

Michigan was the first state to plow it's roads and the first to adopt a yellow dividing line.

RESTORATION $

25/PAIR

Don’t miss these BLOWOUT deals!!!

Colin Dube, son of Derek Dube, Lake City Exports Owner

867 Center Street Auburn 753-0033

BLOWOUT

PRICES!!

2008 Ford Fusion SE

MUST PRESENT THIS AD AT TIME OF SALE TO RECEIVE PRICE LISTED

2005

Saab 9-5 Arc 2006 Honda Element EX

NOW OPEN 6 DAYS A WEEK!!

• Full Reconditioning • Hand Car Wash & Wax • Interior Cleaning • Dualies & Denalis welcome

$10,990

$9,990

AWD, V6, Auto, 73K, CD Changer

AWD, CD Player, Auto, 104K

2009 Ford Fusion SE

2007 Mercury Mariner Premier

We take pride in your ride!

$10,990

Steve Dubois Owner

V6, AWD, Auto, 84K

2006 Ford Explorer XLT

865 Sabattus Street, Lewiston • 333-3004 liquidsunshinecarwash.com Hours: Mon- Fri 9:00am - 5:00pm Sat 8:30am - 4:00pm Uncle Andy’s Digest ...witThravis & Jimbo

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$10,990 Limited, AWD, Fully Loaded, Tow Pkg., Sunroof

$9,990 AWD, 84K, CD Changer, Auto

2006 Mini Cooper

$9,990 5-Speed, LOW LOW Miles, 69K, CD

WWW.U NCLE A NDYS . COM