A More Surprising World
Griffin Pototschnik Age 10
War of the Tots On a totally normal day, Ugly Potato Stinklefink was farming some potatoes. He always did this on the third week of every month. He would water them every week and give them plenty of sunlight. Then, he would sit in his house and wash his tentacles. This was what he was doing on the day his life changed forever. The doorbell rang. This was very unusual since he lived in the middle of nowhere, and he was very ugly. He went to open the door and found a package. He opened it and inside was some growth spray for . . . POTATOES! Ugly Potato Stinklefink instantly ran straight for his twenty mile garden and sprayed his 17,876,122 potatoes with the spray. He waited the whole day to see if anything would happen. Eventually, he fell asleep outside. He woke up to a huge roar. There was a giant monster made up of a lot of potatoes standing right over him. He quickly ran back into his house and got some weed killer. He sprayed it on the monster, and it started shrieking in pain. Stinklefink ran away toward a village forty miles west of there. Along the way, he found a lot of TNT (don’t ask me why), so he exploded holes in case the monster came back. Eventually, he could see the village and was so happy. As he came closer though, he could see that there was no activity going around outside. There was no one outside. He was confused about this because everytime he walked here to buy his potato seeds, everyone would be out in the streets. He walked into one of the houses, and it was completely empty except for a note. It read: “To anyone who has come to find us (or buy potato seeds), we have left for an island called Massacre Island. They have a lot of Jolly Ranchers there, and Sour Patch Kids who go to the schools. We just thought it was a much better place to live than this place.” Ugly P was so sad. He came to this village every day to buy 5,998 potato seeds, but now they were all gone. He could hear the potato monster coming closer and closer. He could hear its giant footsteps stomping on the trees coming closer and closer. Then, he heard an explosion. It must have been one of the TNT sticks . . . but why would it have gone off so late? Ugly P looked over his shoulder. All of a sudden, his face and neck felt heavy almost like he was balancing a five hundred pound weight on his nose. It was hard to breathe, and every
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