UNITED STATES
A WING AND A PRAYER
Carlin Lawrence carlin@agairupdate.com
The Self-Destructive Sin of Unforgiveness
Unforgiveness and bitterness are often hidden sins. No one may notice your bitterness and unforgiveness at first, but the poison is doing its hidden work inside your heart.
B 38 | agairupdate.com
We’re all guilty of offending other people, and we’ve all been offended by other people; that’s the facts of living in a sinful world. But as Christians we’re told to be forgiving people. It’s impossible to live a victorious Christian life with unforgiveness in our life. It isn’t the offense that destroys relationships, it’s the inability to forgive that destroys relationships. Unforgiveness is poison to the soul. Unforgiveness is a sin that locks the unforgiving person in their own self-made prison. It’s as bad as being enslaved to mind-altering drugs or alcoholism. Unforgiveness is a sin that will destroy its own container. Unforgiveness is a sin that will destroy you like an incurable cancer. Unforgiveness is a sin that causes bitterness in our life. The Bible warns about bitterness: “Looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled” (Hebrews 12:15). The word “bitterness” comes from the Greek word “pikria.” It’s used in Acts 8:23 of a condition of extreme wickedness, “gall of bitterness” or “bitter gall.” Romans 3:14 says it’s a mouth full of cursing and bitterness. Ephesians 4:31 says its “bitter” hatred; and in Hebrews 12:15 it’s a root of “bitterness,” producing “bitter” fruit. In Deuteronomy 32:33 and Job 20:16, it represents the deadly “poison” or “venom” of poisonous snakes. Jesus said, “Whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses” (Mark 11:25-26). This isn’t about our eternal salvation, that’s secure when we put our faith in Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior. This is about
our being blessed or disciplined by God (Hebrews 12:7-11). God will not hear our prayers when we have unforgiveness in our life (Isaiah 59:1-2). People often say: “I don’t get mad; I get even.” People mistakenly believe that their bitterness and refusal to forgive will make the other person suffer. But it’s the unforgiving person that suffers! The Bible says, “Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, ‘Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,’ says the Lord” (Romans 12:1719). “Unforgiveness” doesn’t yield the right of vengeance to the Lord; the bitter person wants to become their own god and becomes his/her own worst enemy—destroying their self. Unforgiveness and bitterness are often hidden sins. No one may notice your bitterness and unforgiveness at first, but the poison is doing its hidden work inside your heart. Unforgiveness is usually a result of ungodly pride and self-righteousness. Unforgiveness is often the sin that’s committed against those we’re the closest to and dearest to us. There’s the sayings “Familiarity breeds contempt” & “Why do we always hurt the ones we love.” Unforgiveness is often a family sin. Husbands won’t forgive their wives; wives won’t forgive their husbands; children won’t forgive their parents and parents won’t forgive their children. Peter tells us, “Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered” (1 Peter 3:7). If this is true for husbands and wives, then it’s true for everyone, married or
