Carolyn Ulitsky :: BEING PRESENT TO WHAT’S POSSIBLE
What I learned from writing the article for the “Navigating Fear and Uncertainty” issue is that our heart invites us to action steps that allow the building of self-trust and self-certainty. In embarking on a new relationship, which I wrote about last month, it was the small steps my heart invited me to take that allowed joy to emerge. From the inkling to drop a quick text for coffee to gently saying no to an invitation to dinner because of work (and offering alternative dates) to short quick text messages, simple outings with our friends, and sharing deeper parts of myself that allowed me to accept and acknowledge those parts of myself in ways that I had not allowed myself to experience before. What I realized in this new relationship is I finally wasn’t in
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Joy is staying the leader of your life, honoring your heart’s call to action for yourself.
any rush and had no expectations of where all this was going. I was beautifully guided to commit to what is present in the NOW. Without uncertainty there is no magic and there is no joy. It is in the grace and compassion of being present first for myself and then my partner that we can encourage our individual uniqueness and deepen our self-trust and self-certainty and self-love and be able to extend it to each other. Joy was bubbling up with each invitation to follow my heart’s call to action and in taking the risk to honor those offers. As my joy was emerging, I noticed that others were challenged with their own uncertainty/fear. In fact, it triggered a few people closest to me and to my partner. It offered those friends and families to examine their own unresolved feelings. It was a mental battle to hold my head up. As a recovering people pleaser, my former tendency and thoughts would lead me to dim my joy or excitement so that others would not feel bad. Pangs of guilt and shame did show up. I wrestled those parts of me, giving them a moment to be seen, felt and heard. As I was present with those parts of me that felt shame and guilt, and then they gently resolved and dissipated through my body, mind and heart. In the past, the guilt and shame would take over, and I’d hide my joy. It would result in frustration
