Daring Woman - January 2021

DARING WOMAN JANUARY 2021

3 Simple Habits to Boost Your Mood This Winter

Yoga for Runners

Taking Stock of 2020

In This Issue 7 | Taking Stock of 2020

27 | Living the Dream

13 | How To Get What You Want By Letting

29 | 3 Simple Habits to Boost Your Mood This

Go Of What Others Think

Winter

17 | A Life in Sales

32 | I Became a Best-Selling Author After

21 | Yoga For Runners

Making a New Year’s Resolution

HOW TO KEEP OUR GRADES UP IN SCHOOL WHILE HAVING FUN Daring Woman pg 3

Letter From the Editor 2020 was quite the year wasn’t it? From horrific wildfires in Australia to the COVID-19 pandemic, it seemed like the world was taking hit after hit. I still don't understand the toilet paper shortage.

Sure, we joked about it on social media. “Who had murder hornets on their 2020 bingo card?” That was a way of relieving the stress and fear. But if we look beneath the exterior, we’ll find some good things actually have come from this.

Mother Earth was given a much-needed break from pollution and allowed to heal. For the first time in years, heavily polluted areas were blessed with clear skies and clean air.

A sense of unity. Singing and conversing from

I think 2020 was a year of awakening. Of

balconies, our European friends showed us that

change. We have found some major weaknesses

even during a lockdown community is important.

in our world where we need to come together

We just have to be unique.

and repair, but we’ve also found some major strengths.

We have a newfound sense of appreciation for our front-line workers and our essential workers.

We’re not out of the woods though. No, my

Businesses adapted much quicker than the general

friend, this is

population but in the end we came together and

just the beginning of something new and

made it work.

exciting for our world and I for one cannot wait to see what’s in store for us.

Companies discovered that allowing employees to work from home cuts down on overhead and raises productivity. I suspect we’ll see a big telecommute movement in 2021 as companies continue allowing employees to work from home, even if it’s part-time.

What's Your Word of the Year for 2021?

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Contributors Julee Hunt Julee Hunt is a Worthiness Warrior who inspires audiences to transform hopelessness, exhaustion, and depression into purpose, playfulness, and meaning. She has a vision to create a world where worthiness is the way for everyone. After a job loss and life pausing illness, she devoted herself to reclaiming her worthiness becoming the leader of her life. She has appeared on the Oprah Show, the Hay House “A Trainer’s Guide to Infinite Possibilities Certification Course,” Infinite Possibilities conferences, and on multiple podcasts. Julee authored the #1 Best Selling book “You Are WORTHY! Even When You Believe Otherwise: A Guide for the Overwhelmed Perfectionist.

Jennifer O'Callaghan Jennifer is a Toronto-based journalist and entrepreneur. She loves to write about creativity and help others with their personal goals. She can be found working up a sweat in dancehall and hip hop cardio classes.

Get in touch at jenniferocallaghan.com and Instagram.

Kate Blake Kate Blake is an Author, Speaker and Certified Coach NLP, Hypnosis and Timeline Practitioner.She was adopted as a baby and suffered a Sexual assault at the age of 16. She has been a single mum with low self esteem but to help her family and her future she worked her way up in the construction industry. Now in her 50s Kate wants to help others with her experience and learning of life.

Daring Woman pg 5

Sandra Stachowicz Sandra Stachowicz is a narcissistic abuse survivor, an immigrant from a post-communist country and a college dropout raised by a single mother of five, turned a five-times bestselling author and a book coach for high-flying influencers. She is also a member of a Think Tank for Women in Business & Technology, a global transformational speaker and a high in-demand ghostwriter for her extremely busy millionaire clients.

To learn more about Sandra visit her website at www.AwakenInnerGoddess.com

Gemma Nice Gemma helps professional women who are trapped in the unhappy, unhealthy, and unsatisfying work life cycle; which is causing them to feel old before their time, unloved by those closest to them, and as though their life has no meaning.

Elyse Hughes Elyse Hughes is a Writer, #HolisticJunkie & Cat Mama who shares stories about her beautifully messy & ever-winding SelfLove journey.

Her TEDx, Learn to Love Your Ugly Bits, proposes that by choosing the path of self-appreciation, we consciously create an extraordinary life. Her upcoming book, Trying To Make It, charts her years of entrepreneurial escapades that led her back to a long held dream of becoming an author. Share the journey with @elysehugheswriter on Instagram and binge read her collection of eclectic, cosmically humorous Micro Blogs on elysehughes.com.

Dr. Rana Al-Falaki Dr. Rana Al-Falaki is a multi-award winning leader in her field, a coreenergy coach, international speaker, host of Be Free, Be Fun Fearless video and podcast series, and best-selling author. She is also a mother of three, tea-lover, adventurer and believes everything in our lives has be balanced with choice and fun. She can be contacted via her website.

Daring Woman pg 6

Taking Stock of 2020 Don’t Ignore the Gifts

by Julee Hunt

2020 was emotionally draining, stressful, and

In fact, I learned so much about myself last year

downright exhausting—for me, for you, and for

that I dedicated the month of December to reading

everyone else on the planet. None of us

through all my journals and reviewing

could have predicted the events that occurred in

everything I learned. I wanted to document all of it

what I will dub as a wild year.

so I would not forget the work that I had done, the lessons I’d learned, and the growth I experienced.

When I was young and imagined the year 2020, I

I discovered the gifts were coming fast and

thought we would be driving flying cars, not

furious!

learning how to wash our hands. There were many disappointments, losses, and ups and downs.

I looked at each month and read my journals, paying attention to how I was feeling about the

There were also many gifts. You may not have

events that were unfolding around me. I saw the

seen it that way at the time or even been willing to

epiphanies and realizations that gave me the

accept them, but it is not too late. I encourage you

opportunity to change my behavior.

to recap your own 2020 and document it as one for the history books. After all this has been a

As I did my review, I was reminded of so much.

historical year and there are stories and nuggets

As the world felt out of control, I saw that I tried

that will be handed down to your children and

to find control in other areas of my life –

your children’s children and beyond.

specifically trying to control my husband.

Needless to say, that did not go well. Realizing

First, though, you must take the time to process all

that helped me get crystal clear on what was

of it.

important and what was not. As I looked at all my regularly scheduled social activities that

Journaling is my salvation in all situations. It’s

had disappeared with the pandemic, I realized that

how I process—I typically complete a minimum

many of them did not fill my soul. I have vowed to

of three journals a year. 2020 was a

eliminate many of them for good once we are able

five-journal year. There was a lot to process. I

to venture out again.

completed my next book about the parenting crisis we are experiencing in our world, and it brought

I saw how I made time for things that filled my

up many childhood trauma memories to be healed

soul that I had denied in the past because I did not

once and for all. Add to that the trauma of the

have time for them. Things like creating with

pandemic, rampant racism and inequality, too

sparkly markers, reading books, and spending time

many hurricanes and forest fires created by

in the bubble of my immediate family playing

climate change, and here in the US, a government

games and having deep conversations.

that was not giving us the facts to be able to come together and solve problems. Suddenly,

My husband and I live in an RV. As an author and

our world felt unsafe, upside down, and chaotic.

a coach, I have worked from home for two decades. My husband usually goes into an office

Lucky for me, the pandemic gave me lots of time

to work. When my husband was sent to work from

to think, contemplate, journal, and heal old

home until the pandemic was over, it made sense

traumas, which made it easier to heal the

for him to work at MY desk. This meant when I

new traumas. Yes, I learned a lot about trauma in

had meetings with clients or my editor, I was

2020 and am grateful I was given that gift. A gift

relegated to the bedroom, had to close two sets of

that was painful but so worth the journey.

doors between the front and rear of our RV in

Daring Woman pg 8

order to not interfere in each other’s meetings.

shorten our lifespans, so learning to release both is

When I wasn’t in meetings, I worked at the

beneficial and crucial. I also learned that people

kitchen table with noise cancelling headphones, so

who survive traumas live longer than people who

I was not distracted by his meetings.

never experience adversity or trauma in their life.

With that tidbit of information, I’m sure I will

My husband was sent to work from home in

become a centenarian!

March and he is still here! I learned that I’m OK with sharing my desk some of the time, but NOT

While I had my own traumas going on, my clients

all the time. I found myself being resentful that he

had theirs too. Working from home full-time and

was working at the lush workspace I designed for

homeschooling their children was a biggie.

writing books and talking to clients.

How do you fit both into a day? Not to mention that most of us are not equipped to be teachers.

Having both of us work from home in such a small space required some very creative solutions. When both of us had Zoom calls at the same time, it could get pretty chaotic. So, my husband started working outside in the mornings giving me more time at my desk. He eventually rented a small office space two days a week which gave me two full days at my desk. These compromises really helped.

A major gift of 2020 in our family was the arrival

Add to that the newness of going from being busy,

of our granddaughter. And we happily realized

busy to having nothing but work and school on the

that our motorcoach is a pandemic-free zone.

schedule and being confined to the house or

Since everyone was working from home, we

apartment. So many new things to learn this year

figured it did not matter where we were parked so

for every family. Online meetings had baby

we moved our RV to Georgia for three months to

visitors sitting in the laps of their parents.

help our son and daughter-in-law with the baby.

Teenagers were even more surly than normal

We would never had had that much time with our

because they did not get to spend time with their

granddaughter and the kids had we been living in

friends. People were confused about the

a stationary home. Since they were both working

information they were receiving about

from home too, having an extra set of hands a

the pandemic and no longer felt safe going out

couple days a week was quite helpful! I will

into the world.

forever be grateful I got to cuddle our granddaughter through her first few months of

This very awkward, confusing year invited us all

life!

to become conscious about how we wanted to live our lives going forward. There is no going back to

With all the extra time on my hands, I took some

the way it was because life permanently changed

courses on trauma. I learned how trauma impacts

around the world.

our bodies and how we create coping mechanisms

I’m choosing to see that it is changing to

to get by but not necessarily to thrive. I was able

something even better than before.

to see the year through this lens. Those coping mechanisms can also impact our health and

Daring Woman pg 9

Before you move forward in 2021, I recommend

Epiphanies, A-HA Moments, and Things I

you take stock of the gifts, losses, and epiphanies

Learned:

of the incredible year behind us. You have

permission to start your 2021 in February if you so desire!

I did not realize how much I was worrying about my husband’s safety as he drove an hour to and from work each day.

I saw how I learned to walk a tightrope of

Here’s a peek at mine.

Gifts: The word I chose for the year back in January was TRUST. I thought it meant trust in the outside world and those around me. Turns out it meant to trust myself.

Early in the pandemic I was watching events unfold around the world. I especially loved watching the Italians—they made me feel that we would get through this and we would do it with grace. Remember how they pulled their kitchen tables out on their balconies and had dinner with their neighbors? They found a way to stay connected and social distanced.

And how the opera singer and the personal trainer stood in the middle of the apartment courtyard and entertained and inspired all the residents.

And then there was Mother Earth, who finally had a chance to heal because no one was driving to work and clogging the air with car exhaust.

perfection as a child hoping it meant I would be abused less—and I carried that into my adult life.

I know now that when I give my power away to the outside world, I go down a rabbit hole of self-doubt, unworthiness, and self-hatred, and it is not pretty.

I can honor, protect, and treasure my power as my liquid gold and superpower.

I can choose to stand in faith rather than fear about the events unfolding in our world.

I have the power to disconnect from things that impact my energy negatively—like the news and social media.

I realized I was using anger to find some control in my life but, it felt very out of control internally. And I saw that it was zapping my energy when I tried to control things that were out of my control.

I learned to respond from my heart instead of reacting from my ego.

My unreasonable need to keep everyone safe in my family stemmed from no one keeping me safe as a child.

Losses: My Dad died in July. We were unable to visit him during his last two weeks of life or have a funeral for him.

My original vision for 2020 changed.

Having time alone during the day.

Being free to go out and do the things I want to do.

Feeling safe in public.

Once you’ve made your list, take your time to mourn and grieve your 2020 losses. Journal about it. If you lost a friend or family member, write down the memories you made together, thank them for being a part of your life, and say goodbye. I encourage you to take the time to think through the year and process all the events of 2020 and how they impacted you, your family, and your life. After you have finished, create a personal manifesto for your new and improved life going forward. How do you want life to be different? What will you change? What will you keep?

Daring Woman pg 10

When I did this exercise, I saw that I had become unconscious about the way I was living and want to be more conscious about how I approach my days. I’m choosing activities that bring me joy and leaving behind the ones that suck the joy out of my soul. What about you?

This exercise will take some time. Take as much as you need! If it takes the entire month of January, so be it! Light a candle, meditate for a few minutes and begin. You experienced a lot last year and you deserve to process it, receive the gifts it offered, and create a life filled with joy, fun, laughter, and activities that fill your soul.

You are worthy of that life!

Daring Woman pg 11

RELEASING TRAUMA a survivor's podcast

Tracey Osborne www.ReleasingTraumaPodcast.com

How To Get What You Want

By Letting Go Of What Others Think

by Jennifer O'Callaghan When I was in elementary school, sometimes, my mom would stealthily replace the teen soap opera novels on my nightstand with more wholesome reading. They were lighthearted books with an under current of the importance of not worrying how others perceived you, or your unique brand. They usually involved a child protagonist, wise beyond her years, boldly standing up to school bullies.

These stories made independence of others’ opinions seem quite effortless. Relieved by this, I continued to be my neon pant wearing, hair scrunchie loving self. That is, until high school arrived, and, my hormones raged to an alarming height. Suddenly, I couldn’t think of much else besides the way jocks looked at me in the hallway, or why I wasn’t invited to my arch frenemy’s party on Saturday night. What were they thinking of me? I just wanted to fit in. The books I’d believed in those years ago suddenly appeared to be exactly what they were. Fiction.

Daring Woman pg 13

As humans, especially when entering the adult world,

You can’t read too much into the positive or negative

it’s hard to let go of our primal roots. In ancestral times,

feedback. Learn the difference between constructive

group inclusion was necessary for basic survival. You

advice and nonsensical comments that hold no value.

needed to be part of the tribe so you had shelter or weren’t taken out by a woolly mammoth. But in current

Bold Choices Create A Divided Response

days, we don’t have the same threats of immediate danger. Modern days have seen the birth of the car, the

Boldness is polarizing. You’re going to cause a

internet, and the Kardashians. We’re a world away

positive response in some and a negative one in

from prehistoric times, yet the struggle over others’

others. There will always be haters, no matter what

judgement is real as ever.

you do. A controversial icon like Madonna has clearly been aware of this since day one, and that’s

When we begin to discover the things we care about

what’s helped her succeed and navigate her way

and want to pursue, those dreams might not align with

through the extreme reactions to her work, whether

everyone’s idea of success or safety. It can be good to

venomous detractors or devoted fans. You can’t do

seek advice at times, but, externally seeking validation

anything great and not be criticized by someone,

can be a death sentence to dreams. In order to know

somewhere. Acceptance of that will liberate you.

what’s worthwhile to us, we have to detach from the static noise of the world. That can be easier said than

Align With Like-Minded Professionals

done, but if you feel like you’ve been programmed to pursue what looks good on paper, it may be time to get

Be conscious of who you surround yourself with.

re-aligned with what holds true meaning for you.

Create a crew of people who get your goals. Find

Remember, your anxious emotions aren’t necessarily a

creative or entrepreneur groups online, or in your

bad thing. At times, they can be helpful, and indicate

area. It’s also helpful to have at least one ally you

useful information. The key though, is not allowing

can talk shop with, where you mutually support one

them to knock you off track or let fear of others’

another’s projects. Even if it’s just a weekly coffee

opinions stop you from making your unique mark on

chat, prioritizing those conversations will help you

the world.

feel secure in your journey and less inclined to search for support from those who might not get

What You Love Should Matter The Most

your objective. I have a standing Zoom call booked with an artist friend every Saturday. We discuss our

Look at what motivates you. Start questioning what’s

ideas and try to offer one another troubleshooting

behind your goals. Once you’re clear about that, don’t

advice on problem areas. I truly value this time, and

let others decide what you’re capable of. Only you can

it gives me a boost to feel aligned with someone

clearly see your vision. When you put passion into

who’s facing similar challenges.

what you do, your critics tend to fall to the wayside. It’s hard for other people to judge you if you’re happy, and

Don’t Expect The Worst

earning a living at what you love. When you put yourself out there and pursue your dream, it’s good to

If someone asks you to explain what you do, don’t

be somewhat skeptical of what’s said about you.

automatically assume they’re being

Daring Woman pg 14

judgemental. Perhaps they’re just asking you to elaborate on what you do. If they still don’t seem to understand after you’ve explained, don’t chase their approval. Trying to change how others feel about you is a waste of time and energy that you can’t afford to burn when you’re chasing an ambitious end goal.

If I could sit down with my high school self, I’d urge her not to let go of those stories where following your heart wins out, no matter what others say. It’s human nature to ponder how others perceive you. The trick is to not let it paralyze you.

Let go of what sounds good, and allow only the things with true meaning to be your guide.

Daring Woman pg 15

www.BecomingHerBook.com

A LIFE IN SALES

BY KATE BLAKE

I have worked in sales for many years. Over thirty if

It was the 1990s and I was one of many working in

I’m honest, where does the time go? However, I

advertising, selling various things, mainly

think my journey in sales went far beyond those 30

advertising space in magazines, newspapers and

years.

various directories. I would feel anxious as I got on the bus in the morning, anxious all day and anxious

As a little girl, I used to set up shop around my

all evening until Friday when I felt ok, but Sunday

house. My mother was a nursery teacher and she was

I would be starting to get anxious again.

wonderful at playing along with my imaginary shop keeper jobs. On school holidays she would bring

The problem was I had forgotten how to sell. let’s

home the school grocery play shop equipment

go back to the cake stall at church. Those cakes

and lots of tiny play tins of food and plastic

were beautiful, and the customers buying them

vegetables and fruit for me to display in my shop.

were giving to the church charity. There were clear

She would get our neighbour, Ethel, and they would

benefits to why the visitors to the stall would want

dutifully line up to buy their groceries for a few

to buy them and I loved them too. Who doesn’t

pennies.

love cake?

I also used to love to play Librarian as we had the

So, what had I forgotten when I returned to sales as

luxury of many books around the house. I would

an adult? Firstly, I had no passion for what I was

insert a piece of paper into each book and with a

selling. It had become all about the sale. I was in

stamp my mum provided, I would stamp each book

fear of not selling, which made me feel anxious. I

as quickly as I could and file them in order of author.

would contacting a everyone and anyone, and not

Ah those carefree days.

having any consideration to whether the product was suitable for them. Eventually, I left sales and

As I got older, I started to love to do charitable things

vowed never to go back.

for our church. Helping hand out and collect Christian Aid envelopes and also, I would insist I

My next career was in customer services and

worked on any store during any church fates. I loved

complaints. Yes, another tough area. But I learnt to

the cake store for obvious reasons.

do something very important in this role. I learnt to listen. It’s a funny thing really and a simple one. At

When I left school, I left with no qualifications. I was

times I would be talking to some very angry

dyslexic although this had not been diagnosed and

customers. Had I have stormed in to try and fix

wouldn’t be for 20 years, so I felt my options were

their problems without listening to them, I don’t

limited. Back in the 1980s, I wouldn’t have really

think I would have calmed the situation down at

thought about being a sales rep because back then I

all. So, I would stop, listen and look for

used to mainly only hear about salesmen, not

a solution to help them. This was a great learning

necessarily saleswomen. I now know they did exist,

curb for me.

but then salesmen still ruled.

At the same time as working in this industry, I had With no qualifications I started working in sales

to take on an evening job. The jobs I was working

offices, very tough ones. I really wasn’t equipped for

in customer services were very low paid.

such offices.

Daring Woman pg 18

I was going through University at the time doing

It was a bit of a sidestep, an office job imputing

distance learning so I could start to look at a

housing specifications, but it was ok. The only

better career, but whilst I was doing this, I had

problem was getting to the office which

children to feed as a single parent. So, I started

was forty miles away. I have a clapped-out car

work in a lap dancing club.

which threatened overheating all the way there and back and after about year I knew I had to make a

Ok a strange decision and I could probably write

change. Besides the fuel costs were too expensive

a whole article on that, but I had trained as a

for me and I was starting to go into arrears in my

dancer up to the age of eighteen, so it’s

bank.

something I knew I could do and make a bit of money doing. But again, this became another listening exercise. I would have to compete with the other women for dances and although I only come in occasionally unlike a lot of the girls who were there most nights, I could very quickly build connections with customers to gain dances. It’s a strange thing to say but working in customer services and complaints and then dancing clubs had taught me a lot about people.

One day, one of the Sales managers sat next to me in the office. He was using one of the desks to hot desk and do some work. I knew he had a team of sales reps working for him nationally looking

after

construction

companies.

With my knowledge of construction, I thought I could work for him. Yes, back in sales, and I was a

It didn’t take me long before I left the club to move onto new things. I had my daughter and I started to move into better jobs. I had qualified in construction management and moved into Surveying on site. Building sites were a

little nervous of that, but I had watched the sales managers over the last year, and realised it was something I could do.

completely new thing for me.

But I grew strong work relationships

From out of nowhere, I

and really enjoyed my experience

asked him if I could have a

there. I was so grateful to be

private chat. We went in to

in a job which gave me

one of the offices and I

pride. Considering the low

explained my situation.

paid jobs, I had experienced in my life.

Actually, that moment changed everything for me.

But it only lasted a few years, as we went into a global financial recession. The company folded and like many others at that time I was unemployed. It was very difficult at that time to get new employment so when the first job offers came around, I jumped at it.

Daring Woman pg 19

Within a few months, I was working on a major account. I had a company car and was back in sales.

But you know what? Everything had changed.

I was looking after a twenty-five-million-pound account, building amazing rapport with my customers, some of who remain great contact today.

My sales career went on from strength to strength

Authentic and a bit of a goofball. I never have

with me building up more and more contacts and

and never will think I know it all. I mean who

friends within the industry.

does? In fact, quite the opposite I generally feel a huge amount of imposter syndrome and

I have now come out of the construction industry

wonder when I will get found out for just being

as I now have my own coaching business and I run

me. I think we all feel this from time to time,

sales courses, but I still get to speak to a lot of

don’t we?

people in the industry.

So, going from anxious in sales to running sales What were the lessons I learned?

training and coaching people to be better salespeople is one hell of a turnaround. But that

Well as I mentioned, I learned to listen to people,

happens in life, and if there is one tip, I can ever

find out what they needed and how I could help

give someone in sales or looking to grow sales

them was the biggest lesson. I made it all about

within their business, the tip would be, just be

the customer and not the sale. I worked with them

you.

and built up strong levels of trust. I would make it my business to understand what they were

Don’t change that. Have a clear intention and

experiencing and what was keeping them up at

listen to your customer. Understand what it is

night. I would not try and sell them something I

you can help them with. Keep learning, do your

knew they wouldn’t want. I took an interest to

mindset work and go from fearful to fearless

learn about their businesses.

in sales.

But I also worked on my Personal Development.

This was really important to me. When I first went back in sales, I thought I had to be like the other people in my team, I had to be “one of the guys!”

But I realised this was not going to work for me. I needed to be me.

Daring Woman pg 20

Yoga For Runners

by Gemma Nice

Whether you are new to yoga or a seasoned yogi, these stretches will help to release tightness and tension in the pelvic area, release tight hamstrings and generally make you feel calmer and content. You can use these exercises as a warmup or warm down.

Perform these poses for five breaths on each side before or after running or just use for a gentle stretch two to three times per week.

High Lunge Targets: hips and chest, stretches the groin and legs, lengthens the spine and strengthens the lower body.

Step one-foot forwards and the other leg backwards.

Bend the front knee and have it stacked over your ankle. Checking you can see your big toe. Have heels in line with each other. Extend the back leg up towards the sky, pushing the knee backwards. Engage all your leg muscles and glutes, coming onto your toes on the back foot. Push down the heel, stabilising on the ball of the foot.

Crescent Lunge Same as high lunge but push hips forwards and draw torso backwards.

Daring Woman pg 21

Butterfly Pose Targets: inner thighs, groins, and knees.

Come into a seated position onto the floor.

Come to the front of the sitting bones.

Bring your feet in towards you clasping your feet with your hands.

Lift through the sit bones, lengthening through your spine. In every exhale, move your knees out feeling your hip flexors opening. Engage your core muscles and lengthen through your chest.

Seated Spinal Twist Come to a seated position with your legs out in front of you and sitting on your sitting bones.

Bend the right leg over your left and place your right foot just the other side of your left knee.

Keeping the left leg straight, push the heel away from you, flexing the toes towards the shin engaging all the leg muscles.

Bring

your

left

elbow

to

rest

on

the

middle or outside of your right knee with your hand pointing upwards, palm facing away from you.

With you,

your

right-hand

pushing

round

on

into

your

place

the

next

mat

exhale.

it

behind

and

twist

Using

a

block to get extra height if needed.

On every inhale lift through the crown of your head and on every exhale twist the

chest

round

further,

making

sure

your torso is forward and up.

Daring Woman pg 22

Cow Face Legs Come to a seated position with your right leg bent and foot placed under your left thigh, knee facing down.

Bring your left foot over the right knee and place to the outside.

Hug your knee drawing it towards your chest, pushing into the sit bones, lengthening through your spine and the crown of your head. Feeling the hip flexors opening.

Standing Folding Fold Stand with feet together and bring the weight to the back of the heels.

Bring hands to your hips and engage knees into thighs, squeeze your glutes.

Start to fold forward, hinging from the pelvis and not rounding in the back. Try to keep your back flat. Send the hips backwards.

Bring your arms to fold forward, either reaching to touch the toes or holding your shins.

With every exhale, fold further down. Stay here for 5 breaths.

Inhale come back up to standing.

Daring Woman pg 23

Half Splits Come into a kneeling position, place one foot forwards, heel down, toes up, straight leg.

Bring hands down to the mat either side of the front foot.

Keep chest lifted, send hips backwards, gaze towards the toes. Engage core.

Inhale lift up then fold forward, aiming to get head towards the knee. Keep back straight.

Pigeon Pose Come onto all fours. Bring right knee towards right wrist, placing the shin on the mat with foot facing towards the left hip aiming to get shin parallel to top of the mat.

Push the left leg back aiming to sink hips towards the front foot. Releasing the thigh to the mat. Keep pelvis straight.

Have hands down by your hips, lifting up through the chest. Squeeze your glutes (bum muscles) and activate all leg muscles. Push front foot towards left hip. Keep in a straight line.

To advance it, push hands forwards releasing the chest towards the mat coming onto forearms or fold forward to bring chest completely to mat.

Daring Woman pg 24

Reclined Pigeon Pose Come onto your back with knees bent.

Bring right ankle on top of left thigh pushing that knee out to the side.

Bring left leg up pushing into the back of the mat, flexing toes.

Thread your right arm through your legs and left arm to the side, interlacing fingers behind your left thigh.

Draw legs towards chest, pushing right knee out towards the right shoulder.

Keep pushing tail bone down towards the floor.

Seated Forward Fold Sit on the mat with your legs out in front.

Flex toes, pushing heels away. Push calves and hamstrings into floor.

Come onto sit bones by pulling bum cheeks away.

Draw arms up on an inhale, engaging core, exhale fold forward, sending hips backwards, keeping form in the spine and not rounding. Use each breath to fold forward more. Gaze towards your toes.

Daring Woman pg 25

Pyramind Pose Stand with feet three foot apart. Toes facing towards the front of the mat. Press down into heels.

Bring arms behind and hold onto forearms or elbows drawing shoulders backwards lifting through the chest.

Sending hips backwards, inhale lift up lengthening through the spine and exhale folding forwards keeping legs straight.

Look towards the front toes and fold chest over the front leg keeping arms drawn backwards.

Engaging all leg muscles.

Lizard Pose Come into low lunge, stacking knee over ankle on the front leg.

Squeezing glutes and activating all leg muscles, bring hands down to the mat inside of the front leg spreading fingers in line with toes.

Push into the front leg pressing down into the foot making sure knee is over ankle.

To go further bring forearm's down to the floor.

Daring Woman pg 26

ELYSE HUGHES

LIVING THE DREAM

I watched the distance stretch between us over

I now had health insurance for the first time in

paved parking lot lightly sprinkled with cars

seven years. My parents still purchased my most

of early-morning employees. He held a crisp pace

expensive pieces of clothing. I had no 401(k) and

and his new gray flannel swayed slightly as he

cashed out my IRA two years ago when my

drew closer to the glass sliders of the grocery store

entrepreneurial pursuits started

that looked more like a factory. The shirt was a

tanking and I needed it to pay rent. That was the

Christmas gift from his parents, just like my

last time I had any cushion I could call “savings.”

Sherpa-lined L.L. Bean hoodie was a gift from mine.

Some days I felt like I was before the beginning.

So far from breaking through just-getting-by that

I gazed out the large windows of the loaner van

I would never rise above it. Software was

we’d been given while the car was in the shop,

outdated, tech in need of upgrade, a collection of

amidst littering of families that had used it before

writings sitting unpublished until the funds

us. Every turn orchestrated a symphony of clinks

showed up. But living my creative dream of

and jingles – a tiny plastic airplane tumbling

writing was the only thing that swelled my heart.

across the dash, loose change flipping sides in

There was nothing else. Learning to

nooks between the cup holders. Animal cracker

unapologetically love myself and genuinely

crumbs powdered the matted floor and passenger

sharing my experiences in writing – was all I

seats. A bag of fennel seeds scrunched awkwardly

wanted to do. Even though my MacBook was

in the cubby beneath the temperature dials.

now considered “vintage,” I was just beginning.

I imagined two kiddos kicking in the back, with

Living my dream was equal parts amazing

graham-dusted fingers and electronic devices to

and utterly unglamorous. I spent most of my time

keep them entertained while Mama zoomed from

in pajamas, writing, in the thick of my succulent

place to place. She made sure to bring their

jungle with a kitty cat for company. I focused my

Banana Boat SPF 50 for a quick weekend at the

greatest energy into doing what I loved most and

beach, leaving it behind along with the maroon

came the easiest. Turned off my phone more and

2018 planner stuffed in the front console. Life

more. Intentionally connected with creatives that

moved from one thing to the next with little

lived unconventional, uniquely crafted dreams. I

allowance for downtime in the whirl of trips to

embraced my introvert nature that loved alone

Costco, school events, business functions and

time, and in that space I found more comfort in

vacations.

being myself. Giving myself permission to be where I was, doing exactly what I was doing.

My life was nothing like that. I never wanted to be married, have children or a mini van. Two social

He wedged open the slider they left cracked for

outings a week was my max. I called the man I

workers that started before the store opened. I

shared my life with my P.I.C. (partner in

munched on sweet potato crackers in the mini

crime), because “boyfriend” sounded too

van and it started to sprinkle. I had typed half

teenybopper and “soulmate” felt too

this story, but still didn’t know what I really

presumptuous.

wanted to say.

Daring Woman pg 28

I guess it’s this . . . What is Daring if not being who we are? Living how we want? No matter what we’ve achieved or where we stand, loving ourselves, regardless.

3 Simple Habits To Boost Your Mood This Winter

by Dr. Rana Al-Falaki

As the dark nights draw in and the memories

If we elevate how we feel, tolerating can become

of summer fades, we need something to look

all but a distant memory, and a place we needn’t

forward to and boost our mood each day.

return to, regardless of the circumstances.

Whilst balancing a hectic life of work, family,

Incorporate these three simple daily habits into

and responsibilities, we often tolerate what’s

your life, and you’ll feel like the sun is shining

going on around us, feeling powerless to change

every day!

it.

Daring Woman pg 29

Affirm With A Question

Mediation needn’t mean you have to sit on the floor cross-legged, however. You just have

Affirmations are statements you make to

to be able to switch off your mind, and one great

yourself to set your mindset on track, the idea

way to do this is to distract the mind with

being that the more you say it, the more you will

activity. Dancing is a wonderful way to

believe it. In essence however, the statements

incorporate mediation by actively moving

you make may be so far from the reality of your

the body, which in turns raises your vibration

life that there is a disconnect, so deep down, no

and opens you up to being present.

matter how much you say it, you don’t and can’t truly believe it.

You will get multiple benefits from this including can instant energy boost from dancing

Think of the most commonly said statement

around, calorie burn by moving about, instant

of “it will all work out in the end…”.

relief of stress, and of course opening up your

This in itself is an affirmation, but how much do

mind to receive intuitive thoughts which can

you truly believe it when everything around you

only drop in when there is space. This process

seems to be going wrong? If you don’t believe it,

provides that space.

then you will not be energetically aligned with the outcome, which in turn means you are less likely to take actions to follow that course. It is actions that get us to our final destination.

Give Gratitude With An Attitude

Giving gratitude boosts our mood enormously, shifting our energy from noticing what we don’t

A more powerful way to affirm is to combine it with questioning. For example, instead of affirming “it will all work out!”, try asking “how can I help this situation?”, or “how can I feel better about this?”. By asking a question, you

have to what we do have, and also what we wish to have as if it was already there. There more we find and declare things we are grateful for, the more it grows, like a snowball gathering size the more and more as you roll it along the floor.

open up your intuitive guidance, and will set your intention on noticing signs and actioning yourself forwards. We always feel better when we think we can do something to help a situation.

Offering gratitude when we are feeling down is an instantaneous mood booster, and a great way to end your day if you find you have difficulty sleeping due to stress and worry.

Some people like to keep a journal where they

Meditate With A Dance

either list or write a few paragraphs each day; others may prefer to keep a gratitude jar and fill

When we are so busy and stressed out, it’s

it up each time they pass it.

hard to switch our brains off to mediate, let alone actually find time to sit down and do it.

Mediation has a multitude of benefits for our mental, emotional and physical health. We know we should be doing it but incorporating

The key however to elevating your mood is to truly engage with the feeling of the gratitude.

This is where the attitude come in. Say it like you mean it!

it into daily life can prove challenging.

Daring Woman pg 30

Make bold statements and imagine how wonderful it feels or would feel if you had all that in your life right now. This may mean taking your time when writing and just breathing into the feeling, or it may mean quite literally shouting it out loud, with your arms up in the air! The more attitude on gratitude, the happier you will remain.

The fundamental element in all these daily habits is to find a way to make them fun and incorporate them into your busy life. Each of them will help to propel you forward and boost your mood, helping you to remain present in the now, but at the same time hopeful for the future.

I BECAME A BESTSELLING AUTHOR AFTER MAKING A NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION

by Sandra Stachowicz They say the definition of insanity is doing the

Ever since I could read and write, I knew I

same thing over and over again and expecting

wanted to become an author. Yet, here I was, a

different results. Yet, as the year reared its ugly

30-year-old burnout woman, working two full-

head and I carefully reviewed my annual goals

time jobs as a night manager for a holiday

with a magnifying glass, one of my New Year

rental company and doubling as an Airbnb

resolutions stared back at me and whacked me

cleaner during the day just to get my

in the head with the uncomfortable truth with

bills paid.

Summer-themed tips and tricks for the whole family

the impetus of a teenage girl on her period, slamming the door shut.

Daring Woman pg 32

“How come did I get here in the first place?”, I

Between one sob and another, I realised I could

quietly reminisced about my “15 minutes of

fail at a soul-sucking job that I didn’t even

fame” as I took a stroll down memory lane.

want in the first place or I could fail at something I actually cared about for

To an outsider, my success story from five

once! In the heat of the moment, I made up my

years before happened practically overnight.

mind to pursue a childish fantasy of mine that gloriously inevitably always made it onto my

I went from being voluntarily enslaved at my 9-

New Year intentions.

to-5 job to being the sought-out marketing expert. I was featured in a New York Times

A few weeks in the run up to Christmas, I got

and Wall Street Journal bestseller.

to work straight away with the enthusiasm of a kid in a candy store and invested in a measly

I went on a six-month-long solo adventure and

£3.33 e-book promising the secret to

spent a few months working in exotic locations

getting your book written and published.

from the comfort of my laptop. It wasn’t long before some of the biggest names in motivation

I read it from cover to cover and immediately

and transformation circles reached out to work

started implementing all the steps outlined in

with me, including Sonia Ricotti, Debra

the book. I turned into a recluse with an

Poneman, Marci Shimoff and many others.

Einstein-inspired look, and wrote like a mad scientist in a lab. Within days, I had

An opportunity of a lifetime presented itself

20k words worth of content.

when John Assaraf, best known from the film, The Secret, offered to promote me.

Except that I still had no idea how to put all the missing puzzle pieces together and get

As I ruminated over the past through pink-

published.

coloured glasses, the sad reality finally sunk in.

Fast forward a few weeks, and I pulled my hair I yanked out tissues from the deep crevices of

out of desperation. As time went by, my hair

my pocket.

got thinner but I still was nowhere near the publishing stage. With too many questions left

After all these years of trial and error and

unanswered, I frantically stared at my New

entrepreneurial endeavours, I was a NOBODY.

Year resolution proudly displayed right above

A glorified 5-star housekeeper cleaning up after

my desk, desperately searching for clues. As I

the people I once used to work with.

soon discovered one-size-fits-all solutions provided in the e-book, while well-intended,

The prospect of living another year of my life

failed to provide me with in-depth answers that

without having kept any of my New Year

would help move the needle and bring

resolutions finally dawned on me. In my mind I

me closer to completion.

was a pathetic LOSER.

Daring Woman pg 33

I desperately wanted to get my book out into

and beyond painful.

the world but didn’t have the ability to envision what steps I needed to take to make

I thought I was supposed to write my book on

my New Year resolution stick and get

my own. But being “stuck on stupid”

my book published. I was pulled in a thousand

essentially kept me running in circles, with a

directions by the demands of everyday life:

book deadline that kept eluding me. Resigned, I

needy partner, a failing marketing business that

concluded that if I was meant to write my book

needed my undivided attention, and not one,

on my own, I would have published it already.

but two stressful jobs.

Then one New Year’s Eve, I finally wised up.

Rather than getting my book published, I spun my wheels, getting nowhere. I felt constantly

When everyone was out and about celebrating

distracted by unfinished projects, the demands

and getting intoxicated as if there was no

of running a business, bills that needed to be

tomorrow, I was on the precipice of making

paid, and a partner and family who felt

one of the most important decisions in my

increasingly left out and neglected.

life. As difficult as it was to acknowledge, I realised that unless I used a different approach,

All I really wanted was to get my book out

my half-finished manuscript would soon end up

there and make an impact on the world, to

in a books’ graveyard, in a pile of other almost-

succeed at something I actually loved! I

but-not-quite-finished projects in my desk

desperately tried to get my book completed,

drawer.

but ended up wearing too many different hats. I had to learn how keywords worked, grow my

Ouch!

online presence, and be my own PR agent. All while making sure no one died in the process.

Suddenly, as if struck by lightning, I had an ‘aha’ moment. “I’ve worked with up to five

At one point I was so overwhelmed I almost

coaches at any one time to help me grow my

gave up on writing altogether. Finally

coaching business. Why don’t I hire a book

exhausted, I collapsed on the floor and

coach to help me write and publish a book?”

exclaimed: “ENOUGH!”

Right in that moment, I made up my mind that this was the year I was going to get published.

Being the one-woman show that I am, I subscribed to the erroneous and deeply flawed

Period.

belief that reaching out for help was a sign of weakness. To admit that I was somewhat

Without further ado, I put my money where my

lacking and didn’t have the brains to

mouth was and entrusted all my savings to

figure out how to stick to my New Year

someone I barely knew, hiring a high-level

resolution was inconceivable in my mind

book coach, one-to-one.

Daring Woman pg 34

At last, I could put my energy where it belonged and pour all my heart, soul, and wine into what I loved the most, writing!

Or so I thought…

Deep down, I knew I was meant to write a book but caught myself thinking terrible thoughts about myself, my story, and my level of skill. As the villain of this story, from a remote village on the other side of the world and with less-than-impeccable English, I just didn’t see myself as a gifted writer.

“You’ll make a fool out of yourself. Who’d want to hear your story about your failed business or getting a lowly job most people would turn their nose to? There’s nothing remarkable about you or your story.”

“You’re not exactly an authority in your niche.

Look at you. You’re a measly C-L-E-A-N-E-R. A wannabe author. An authority on water closets. How pathetic!”

I wrestled with my demons, but as if to confirm my inner dialogue, as I re-read the passage in my book where I effectively made a confession about my dirty little secret, an undercover stunt as a cleaner, and my eyes zoomed in on my editor’s comments.

“What’s so inspiring about having two full-time jobs?”

There I had it. PROOF, highlighted in red.

Tears welled up in my eyes and my heart just sunk.

Daring Woman pg 35

“You see? Even your own editor

I secretly wished it was as simple as handing in

doesn’t believe you are enough of an expert.

my notice but losing my job essentially meant a

The one person who out of all the

death sentence for my book. As often is with all

people in the world should have a little faith in

matters of substance, once you make up your

the message of your book.”

mind, the Universe conspires behind the scenes to answer your prayers.

It became obvious, I was losing the argument.

Score: 0-2 for the expert on water closets.

To my utter surprise, I realised I had accrued unspent holidays at my job. I had not been

Except that my editor’s remarks were

on holiday for over a year and yearned for a

completely innocent. They were taken out of

three-week-long summer break in a tropical

context. I only saw what I wanted to see.

destination with my long-term boyfriend.

The closer I got to the launch date of my book, the more monsters that crawled out from under my bed: doubt, shame, guilt, and fear. Out of desperation I turned to my book coach for guidance.

“I can’t do this! I’m not enough of an expert!”

I ended up borrowing my book coach’s belief in me when I didn’t have any left in myself.

Having him in my corner meant I had a Sherpa guiding me through the treacherous terrain of becoming a published bestselling author. Reassured by my coach, I made peace with my own “not enoughness,” safe in the knowing that my book was coming out exactly as it should.

Still, the deadly shadow of my book’s launch date loomed over me. As I got closer to the publishing stage, I realised I needed to dedicate

Still, something else quietly robbed me of the joy of getting my book published, preventing me from pouring all my heart and soul into my book. I couldn’t quite reconcile my love for

myself fully to my book, with no distractions whatsoever. Chasing down my dream of becoming a published bestselling author was either now or never.

writing with being voluntarily enslaved in a soul-sucking job.

Daring Woman pg 36

I knew I had to make one of the most difficult decisions ever, even if this choice meant letting my partner down. To my colleagues’

Failing was simply NOT an option!

and bosses’ dismay, rather than spend hundreds of pounds on holidays in some exotic location, I spent the following three weeks at my home in rainy Scotland, tucked away under duvets, perfecting the script of my book.

the process and ensuring that my book would never see daylight.

The sacrifices paid off. Half a month later, the script was ready! But I still wasn’t. Yet I

Not now, not ever.

had to return to work, just as enthusiastic about it as a child being asked to apologize for eating the last cookie.

Admittedly, after my promotion suddenly fell through, I was at my wits end, frustrated beyond words, resentful, and upset. Still, some

A few weeks before my book was published, my fancy job promotion from night-manager to content-manager unexpectedly fell through and I found myself jobless. A few weeks prior,

people seem to have a knack for knocking others when they are down. My mum has builtin receptors to pick up on those rare moments with stunning accuracy.

my bosses forced me to resign from my job as a cleaner. The burden of unpaid bills loomed over me. My dream of ever becoming a published author was suddenly at stake.

During one of her visits my mother probed pitilessly, “What makes you think you can stick to your New Year resolution this time round?

You don’t exactly have a stellar track record

I unexpectedly had 40 hours of time each week

given where you ended up at.”

freed up but I was effectively liberated from the main source of income too. With losing my job, came another dilemma.

I opened my eyes wide and stared at the female head of the clan as if she had twelve noses. I desperately tried to hold back the tears. I

I could potentially waste precious hours applying for temporary jobs just to tie me over or completely commit to writing and

excused myself and locked myself up in a bathroom as ugly tears streamed down my cheeks, too chubby for my 30 years of age.

potentially risk not having enough money left over to pay my editor.

It finally dawned on me that everything I spent the last few months working on could effectively put the launch of my book on hold until “someday,” sealing my book’s fate in

Failing was simply NOT an option!

If anything, my mother’s off-handed remark made me realize that up until that moment I hadn’t really gone ALL-IN with my book or my coaching business. I hadn’t really gone all in with ANY of my New Year resolutions.

Daring Woman pg 37

The reason my silly New Year resolution

To my utter surprise, sticking to my New Year

wasn’t working for me was because I wasn’t

resolution worked like a charm as I bagged a

working for it.

bestselling-author status a week later. For the first time ever, the serial procrastination diva in

Rather than make my mother’s unflattering

me turned my New Resolution into a massive

comments mean anything about me, I renewed

win. I gleefully grinned from ear to ear as I

my vow to make resolution stick and threw

crossed “write a bestselling book” off my

myself back into writing with renewed

bucket list of things that kept eluding me all

energy.

those years.

For me, publishing a book wasn’t a matter of,

Et voilà! A recipe to make a New Year

“How do I make money?” it was a matter of,

resolution and keep it.

“How do I get back up to the standard of living I am used to making?”

In hindsight, taking the time out to review my yearly goals and changing the plan of action by

This sudden realisation led to an unlikely

opening myself up to receive help rather than

epiphany.

trying to it all on my own, as well as having an accountability partner in the form of a book

“Just because I failed to stick to any of my New

coach was the best plan ever.

Year Resolutions does not make me a failure.

Why don’t I leverage that idea and build up on

Looking back, if I hadn’t kept my New Year

my failures?!” With sudden clarity, I realised

resolution and didn’t get my book published, I

not all was lost and I could lean on my previous

honestly think I would still be stuck slaving

successes, just as much as I could draw

away in a 9-5 ticking off items on other

strength from my failures.

people’s bucket list. I most certainly would not be here sitting on my favourite fallen tree over

After months of hard work and with my fingers

a creek, with a grin on my face, my feet

trembling, I finally hit publish, and got my

dangling, dipping my big toe in a cold-water

transformational book out into the world, a

stream, and clutching the latest copy of my

mere 8 months after making my New

book.

Year resolution, on August that same year.

Daring Woman pg 38

As I think back to the time before I kept my

To my surprise, keeping my New Year

New Year resolution, I wasn’t committed

resolution provided me with the never-ending

enough to stick to any of them. I only thought I

sense of adventure, freedom, and meaning.

was. I just dipped my big toe in to test the waters, hoping that the magic of the New Year

Sometimes I feel as if I opened a Pandora’s

intentions would carry me through. I wasn’t

Box full of surprises and unleashed a whole

truly disciplined, consistent or accountable

plethora of unexpected opportunities. Who

enough to myself or others to change my daily

would have ever believed that sticking

habits.

to my New Year intentions would see my book placed by the bedsides in the Waldorf Astoria,

I told myself terrible untruths that my dream of

the very same hotel that I once worked for as a

one day becoming a published author could

cleaner?

wait until “someday.” What I didn’t realise is that “someday” could have easily turned into

The guilty pleasures of life!

“never,” and with that, my hope of ever leaving the corporate world.

They say, there’s no magic to New Year resolutions and there truly isn’t.

Unbeknownst to me, sticking to my New Year resolution set me on the path towards exponential growth. The confidence that came from having a sense of a “mission accomplished” only strengthened my resolve to set even more daring and audacious goals for 2021.

Fast forward two years and four bestselling titles later, I realised that keeping a New Year resolution doesn’t have to be a struggle.

Sticking to a New Year resolution can be easy, but only if you let it.

Daring Woman pg 39

The magic is in MAKING IT HAPPEN.