Get it Magazine Feb 2016 by Get it Magazine

February 2016

E E FR

m a g a z i n e

Amazing affair

Why every woman should have a love affair

Double vision

Multiple baby boom hits the Gold Coast

Physical challenge

Passion

How to live on $10 worth of a food a week

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Contents

Valentines Day Dinner

Sunday 14 February 3 French Inspired Courses by Chef Nathan Harvey. One choice from each course

$89 pp See the menu on our Facebook page

Seating is limited so please call

Phone 5530 1328

9&9a/340 Hope Island Road Hope Island Open 7 days a week from 6am

Features 10 14 16 18 30 33 36 38 49

Eat for $10 a week Supercharge your teamâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s success How to have an affair The world needs more love letters Find success by the stars Picture perfect: Sicily is a must visit Seeing double (or triple) Love yourself skinny Feeling sexy after kids

Regulars 8 Get Out and About 9 Get Thinking 11 Competitions 15 Women of the Month 20 We Love

22 29 42 45 48 50

Fashion and Beauty Hair and Makeup Recipes Get Scene Horoscopes Last Word

THAT LOVING FEELING PAGE 24 Frock on UNSPOKEN black gown // $410 // ADRENALIN BOUTIQUE 5591 6355 // and ring // $69 // bracelet // $198 // and earrings // $198 // MARIANA 5564 1400

February 2016

Valentin e’s Day Lunch

from the editor ELIZABETH CAMPBELL

I was at the supermarket the other day and on my way out when a man stopped and gestured for me to go before him…I waited awkwardly for a few seconds too long before he motioned again to go before him. I smiled and thanked him … how nice. I was quietly pleased; chivalry was not dead.

SPOIL YOUR LOVED ONE

It’s a question posed by numerous women I know – and it gets a good innings in articles plastered all over the net too. Is it dead?

WITH A BEAUTIFUL LUNCH FOR TWO AT LINKS HOPE ISLAND

I don’t think so. I just think chivalry has changed a lot. Men of all ages do chivalrous (aka courteous) things for me and other women I know all the time.

Sunday 14th February, 2016

From my conversations with them and women (and some hot dates thrown in for good measure), we all like a bit of chivalry.

Bring back romance to your life with a seductive, three course lunch set around our European style

Generally, women like it when a man pays for dinner, opens the door, tells them they look amazing, makes sure they are comfortable, sends flowers, hands over his jacket if she’s cold … or is it just me? Men actually like to be shouted dinner too, plus they don’t mind if we ask them out and make the plans (sometimes). Just leave the thrill of the chase to them.

fountain. Bask in the light of our atrium style ceilings and alfresco style dining. Couples will enjoy a decadent share lunch starting with a flute of champagne on arrival, anitpasto platter, main course and asiette plate of desserts.

As we get ready for Valentine’s Day and the month of love, I say let’s let chivalry into our lives and allow men do stuff for us. They like it. It’s part of their DNA (well, that’s what research suggests). And ladies, why don’t we just accept their gestures as acts of kindness. We know we are capable, confident and independent, and don’t need a man, but come on, it’s nice, don’t you think?

Date: Sunday 14th February, 2016 Time: 12:00pm Inclusions: Three course lunch for two, sparkling wine on arrival Price: $99 (based on two people dining)

PS ladies – it’s a leap year this year and the ageold tradition is for a woman to propose to her man. Just saying.

What gets you going? liz@getit-magazine.com.au www.getitmagazine.com.au

For more information phone 07 5530 9000 or email: events@linkshopeisland.com.au

Follow me on:

P: 07 5530 9000 F: 07 5530 9019 E: golfmail@linkshopeisland.com.au W: www.linkshopeisland.com.au

Twit get_it_m ter: aga Faceboo zine get.it.mak: g

February 2016

Contributors

Your Friendly Family Lawyer!

PUBLISHER Leanne Hart leanne@getit-magazine.com.au

helping you make the right choices!

Editor Elizabeth Campbell liz@getit-magazine.com.au

Art Director Aimi Hart aimi@getit-magazine.com.au

Publishing + digital assistant Sophie Wood sophie@getit-magazine.com.au

Fashion + styling Elizabeth McMahon elizabeth@getit-magazine.com.au

Partners Dan Molloy Photography

Editorial Enquiries info@getit-magazine.com.au

Sales Enquiries sales@getit-magazine.com.au 0414 946 361

PRINTING BPA Print Group, Ashmore

Cornerstone Law Offices can help you with a wide range of legal needs including:

Get it Magazine PO Box 7602, GCMC QLD 9726 P: 1300 858 932 e: info@getit-magazine.com.au w: getitmagazine.com.au

• Family law • Wills and estates • Conveyancing • Migration

February 2016

EE FR

Principal: Pravinita (Prav) Singh-Pillay Prav is the principal lawyer of Cornerstone Law Offices and has offices in Brisbane, Logan and the Gold Coast. Prav has extensive experience in family law, criminal defence, civil litigation, debt recovery, wills & estates, conveyancing and employment law, and has a keen interest in advocacy.

m a g a z i n e

Amazing affair

Why every woman should have a love affair

Double vision

Multiple baby boom hits the Gold Coast

Prav has represented clients in numerous mentions, hearings and trials in various courts: Family, Federal Circuit, Federal, State Magistrates and Children’s courts. Her practice extends to representing clients in all aspects of family law, wills, powers of attorney, estate administration, conveyancing, and migration law.

Physical challenge

Passion

How to live on $10 worth of a food a week

Call us today for a confidential chat about your legal matters.

Publishers Indemnity: Those who make advertising placements and/or supply copy material or editorial submissions to Get it Magazine, undertake to ensure that all such material does not infringe any copyright, trademark, defamation, libel, slander or title, breach of confidence, does not contain anything obscene or indecent, or does not infringe the Trade Practices Act or other laws, regulations or statutes. Further to the above mentioned these persons agree to indemnify the publisher and/or its agents against any investigations, claims or judgements. In this magazine we have listed a range of products, prices and stores in across Australia and online. Although prices are correct at the time of printing, they are indicative only as prices and stock may vary from store to store. All prices were provided to Get it Magazine by relevant retailers and suppliers. We advise you to contact the relevant retailers for further information about price and availability. Get it Magazine does not accept any responsibility for price variations, availability or quality of products.

Phone: 07 5538 9119 or visit us at cornerstonelawoffices.com.au 101 Ashmore Road, Bundall Qld 4217 February 2016

WE’VE GOT ROOM FOR ALL SORTS OF CHARACTERS. The Gardens on Lindfield in Helensvale has a place for everyone. Ask us about our $7,000 bonus offer today!* One of the great things about living at The Gardens on Lindfield retirement resort is the characters you meet. We call them “lifestyle inspirees”. Our residents inspire each other with their hobby groups, socialising, health activities, tours and events. They are living proof that life in a retirement village is good for you! Right now, we’re providing a $7,000 bonus as inspiration to buy a modern, spacious condo or villa at The Gardens on Lindfield. Imagine living in a prestigious gated community in central Helensvale, with the peace of mind of fewer maintenance worries and like-minded neighbours. Purchase and settle before 30 June 2016 and You WIll receIVe $7,000 to sPend as You WIsh.* For more information call 1800 550 550 or visit retirementbylendlease.com.au

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February 2016

WHAT’S ON with Sophie Wood

get out

and about in February Send your event to sophie@getit-magazine.com.au

RACV LADIES MASTERS

SAND SAFARI

February 25-26 RACV Royal Pines the RACV Ladies Masters is one of Australia’s best-known professional golf tournaments featuring 144 players from more than 27 countries, including amateur invitations and Australia’s  defending champion Su Oh. ladiesmasters.com

February 5-28 Surfers Paradise Beach Running over three weeks, Sand Safari will feature Kung Fu Panda, Madagascar, Shrek and more carved into large sand sculptures. Enjoy a great day out in Surfers Paradise with the whole family. surfersparadise.com

GOLD COAST MS SWIMATHON

7 SOPRANOS VALENTINES TOUR

February 27 Runaway Bay Sports Super Centre It doesn’t matter if you can do 100 fast laps or doggy paddle one, everyone can join in, have fun and support people living with multiple sclerosis. msswimathon.com.au

February 17 The Arts Centre Gold Coast Prepare to be taken on a journey through classic songs and moving operatic melodies. Seven soprano voices serenade fans with popular opera arias from La Traviata, Carmen, La Boheme and more. theartscentregc.com.au

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February 21 Gold Coast Convention and Exhibition Centre TheThe ultimate in Green Rooﬁ ng ng Head along to the Experience The ultimate in Green Rooﬁ World Travel Expo for expert advice, free travel presentations, amazing insider knowledge so you can research, compare and book your next dream holiday. travelexpo.net.au

February 27-28 Warner Bros. Movie World www.vergolagoldcoast.com.au The Stage One International Film www.vergolagoldcoast.com.au Festival is a prestigious black-tie gala event that combines the film and music industry with a showcase of remarkable talent from Australia and abroad. stageonefilmfestival.com

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GET THINKING

Are you a romantic?

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How do you want your marriage proposal to go? A Your partner would just ask you, no fancy stuff B Your partner would propose down on one knee with a diamond engagement ring during a meal at a special restaurant C You would like to do the proposing A bunch of red roses means: A Your partner did something bad B Your partner loves you C You splurged on yourself Which character do you best identify with? A Cruella de Vil B Sleeping Beauty C Wonder Woman Do you believe in love at first sight? A No, love is just Valentine’s Day propaganda B Oh, yes! C Possibly, once you are secure in yourself you could open yourself to such a connection Which movie would you most likely watch after a break up? A War of the Roses B Ghost C Tomb Raider Your ideal wedding would be: A A ceremony at the registry office followed by a dinner with close friends B A lavish church affair with a big white dress, bridesmaids galore, horse-drawn carriage … C A park ceremony and simple reception, something that really suits your personality Which first date would you prefer? A Hot dogs and drinks at a sports game B A limousine ride to a special restaurant with champagne and roses on arrival C A meal at your favourite eatery and that new movie you have been wanting to see Love is: A A myth B Instant C What you give yourself before you give to someone else Where would you go on a weekend getaway with your partner? A Somewhere with excitement and adventure B A hidden bungalow on an island with no distractions other than your partner C Somewhere relaxing with plenty of entertainment that you would both enjoy

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Mostly A: The Sceptic The question of whether or not romance still exists is a topic you have pondered more than once. You strongly believe that chivalry is dead and it dragged romance along to the burial. Mostly B: The Hopeless Romantic Yes, you are a romantic and proud of it! Bring on the love at first sight, perfect dates and happy endings; you expect the dream to be fulfilled with all the trimmings. Mostly C: The Survivor Romance to you is more about self-fulfilment. Why rely on someone else to give you what you can give yourself? You would not say no to a little external romance.

13 Grice Avenue, Paradise Point www.mirraboutique.com.au Phone 5564 2676 9

February 2016

LOCAL PROFILE with Shae Johnson

Eat for $10 a week Gold Coaster Shae Johnson has put herself through many physical and mental challenges, but this one takes the cake

an you survive for a whole seven days off $10 worth of food? I can. I’ve put myself through a variety of challenges in the last 12 months to improve my mental and physical strength, from stepping into a ring and fighting an opponent in Wanna Be A Kickboxer to baring all my insecurities and getting up at 3.30am to train with Loc Clarke for Funk Fitness’s #LookWickedNaked challenge. But the Gladiator $10 a Week Challenge was by far the most humbling and it took all previous forms of discipline I had to a completely new level. It was proposed by Derek Boyer – World’s Strongest Man 2012 Masters Champion, Australia’s Strongest Man 15 years undefeated and seven-time Australian powerlifting champion – perhaps best known for his role as Thunder on Channel 7’s Gladiator reality TV series. His $10 Gladiator Diet is essentially a three-pronged challenge – live solely on what you can buy for $10 (no handouts allowed and only use salt, pepper and oil from your pantry); undertake a 60-minute gym circuit and a 5km walk (preferably wearing a 10kg backpack) daily; and donate the money you save back to charity. I set out on my journey of enlightenment armed with Derek’s eBook, a $10 note and a whole lot of determination to be a modern-

February 2016

day gladiator. I had to make the most of opportunistic buys including four bags of 900g oats at Coles for $4.80; and filling a grocery bag with blemished and imperfect fruit and vegetables from Woolworth’s daily produce clearance trolley for $3. The key is to stock up on staple foods, especially potatoes and bananas – two carbohydrates I had previously stayed clear of…And I never thought I’d ever have to resort to hip and shouldering to get to a bunch of Dutch carrots! Once home I meal prepped, putting all 19 bananas in the freezer to combine each morning with water, ice and oats in a blender for a breakfast smoothie. Apples and carrots went straight in the fridge – morning and afternoon tea. Two mangoes were cut up and frozen – dessert. Next I made the Gladiator Gruel Soup – 4 litres of water, 4 cups of oats, vegetables including potatoes, carrots, fennel and onions, and a whole lot of salt and

pepper. It was bland but far from offensive. I walked 5km every day and completed low-intensity full-body circuit training on four mornings at World Gym Burleigh with Derek, and then on my own for the remaining days at Funk Fitness because the challenge is designed for anyone to do at their own fitness centre. I didn’t give in once, I never felt hungry and I had a whole heap of food leftover. Before and after body analysis scans at HPC Miami also revealed I lost 900g of body fat. The only real downfall was passing up a restaurant dinner on the sixth night in favour of the gruel soup. But the proudest moment was when I donated the $70 I had saved to OzHarvest, which helped them deliver 140 meals to people in need. From this challenge I learnt so much about the value of food, wastage, resourcefulness and the role it plays to fuel my body. I gained a whole lot of respect for OzHarvest and what they do for people in need, not just across the Gold Coast, but nationally. And I learnt a new appreciation for my freezer, salt and pepper, protein and the privilege of choice. Derek has already filmed a documentary on the $10 Gladiator Challenge and is planning to take it global where he will live off $US10 in LA, 10 Euros in Rome and 10 pounds in London. But for now he wants Gold Coasters to jump on board.

Giveaways

WIN A ROMANTIC WEEKEND FOR YOU AND YOUR LOVED ONE Valued at $890 For your chance to win head to facebook.com/Get.it.mag Grand Motors Toyota and Watermark Hotel Brisbane are bringing you another incredible giveaway to celebrate the month of love. Valued at $800, you have the chance to win a romantic weekend away in the all-new Toyota Corolla Ascent Sport Hatch. Bolder, sportier and more fun than ever before, this car is the perfect accessory for a weekend getaway. Here’s what you’ll get to enjoy: • The all-new Toyota Corolla Ascent Sport Hatch as your weekend drive car • Two nights’ accommodation at Watermark Hotel Brisbane

• Breakfast and parking for your two-night stay • Chocolates and champagne on arrival For your chance to WIN: 1. Head to facebook.com/Get.it.mag 2. Like Grand Motors Toyota Facebook Page 3. Like and share the pinned post Prize is valid to be taken until June 30, 2016. See getit-magazine.com.au/competitions for terms and conditions.

February 2016

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For more information contact info@getit-magazine.com.au February 2016

ADVERTISING PROMOTION

5 ways to discuss a pre-nup with your fiancé t is important to sort out your financial affairs and protect your assets well and truly before your wedding day. A pre-nuptial agreement, now known as a Financial Agreement, is an agreement between two people that sets out how, in the event of the breakdown of the marriage, property or financial resources are dealt with. It can also set out maintenance terms during the marriage and after separation. This may be a difficult topic to discuss with your fiancé, so here are some tips from Cornerstone Law Offices to make it easier. 1. Make it a conversation Make sure you approach the discussion as a conversation rather than as a list of demands: “Let’s talk about getting a prenup” or “How do you feel about getting a pre-nup to protect both of us?” is far more constructive than “We need to get a pre-nup”. 2. Be upfront about your reasons and concerns

If financial independence is important to you or you are worried about being financially disadvantaged if the marriage does not last, then a pre-nup discussion is the time to raise such issues. 3. Cover all your bases together Talking about a pre-nup is a great opportunity to discuss your financial expectations and make sure you have a shared approach. Once your pre-nup is signed, take the time to review it every couple of years and when significant events occur in the marriage such as the birth of a child, or the purchase or sale of a significant asset.

4. Take your time You don’t have to agree on the terms of your pre-nup in one sitting. Give yourself time to take breathers if you need to and consider seeking independent legal advice. 5. Leave room for change over time You and your partner may go into business together or one of you might stop work for a time to look after your children. Remember to create an agreement that is sensitive to different outcomes. For more information Phone: 5538 9119 or Email: prav@cornerstonelawoffices.com.au

Look what’s coming for Autumn/Winter to the best little shoe boutique in town!

February 2016

Business with Trevor Russell t’s the second month of the year already and before you even look up you’re busy, working hard at it again, selling, dealing with the daily challenges of clients and managing your team. But how are you going to supercharge your success and that of your team this year? Do you have a plan? The answer lies in using what you already have, just more effectively. It’s called a “mastermind group”. Napoleon Hill – author of the famous personal development book Think and Grow Rich, talks about tapping into the powers of your mastermind group. It is the power of bringing groups together in forums and exhibitions and round tables, which is a space where you share ideas, solve problems, learn new information, connect and network. Here are the key points of what to do and not to do when using the mastermind group effect to its full power and potential. When your mastermind group is off l The person who has taken on the role of director or business manager, in most cases by default, is put in charge to run these gatherings and quite often they don’t like running groups and speaking publicly. l The person assigned to this role has no understanding of the unique behavioural style and operating habits of other people. l It’s not this person’s natural style and so their facilitating approach is boring and uninspiring, and very often focused on the negatives. l The group meeting structure or agenda is loose to non-existent, boring and uneventful. l The meetings are poorly structured and take up too much time and the topics are deliberated on for far too long. l The person running the group is busy and under large amounts of stress so they are not focused and just want to get it done and get out. Turning on your mastermind group l A mastermind group meets at a consistent time every week or month. The team makes agreement to l consistently attend the mastermind gathering. l Intention of the mastermind gathering is set by the team and all agreed on. l Team members agree to take care of their mind and body to have a clear focus. l The vision is delivered and clearly committed to by the team. l The intention of the mastermind gathering is to get results. February 2016

Mastermind: Supercharge your team’s success Here we are at the beginning of a new year and for many, they hope and pray for a fresh start to clean the slate, and make money and succeed. So how do you do it?

l A space of open, safe and trusted sharing is allowed within the group. l The space is positive, proactive, solutions focused, motivating and fun. l The facilitator works with a clearly defined mastermind structure. l Structure focuses on challenges to clear, miracles, major projects, results and actions. l Mastermind group management is timely, efficient and productive. l Team members’ unique styles are understood, recognised and acknowledged. l Projects are broken into tasks and records kept on what has been achieved and what is still to action. l Specific training and education is conducted as part of the group. l Commitments are made for what needs to be done by the next mastermind gathering. Why are you doing all this work? That’s the million-dollar question. I wish for you to be your best and support your team so they can be their best and grow and develop within your business. 14

Why are you doing all this work? That’s the million-dollar question. I wish for you to be your best and support your team so they can be their best and grow and develop within your business. Trevor Russell is a business strategist, coach, sales and speaker trainer, author and keynote speaker. He has worked with more than 200 businesses across varied industries and is experienced in peak human performance, marketing, finance and sales. To find out more visit trevorrussell.com.au

WOMEN OF THE MONTH

Ladies, all the ladies

Welcome to Get it magazine’s Women of the Month – where we shine a light on and celebrate our Gold Coast women Karen Inglis-Turner Director, Gold Coast Food and Wine Tours What does your role entail? Running food and wine tours throughout the Gold Coast and beyond. What has been your biggest achievement?  Launching my new business Gold Coast Food and Wine Tours. After much soul searching I worked out that my passion in life is food, wine and people. I had a health scare that was a real wakeup call, so I decided to follow my passion by creating a business to showcase the best bars, restaurants and cafes to fellow food and wine lovers. Why do you love what you do? I love discovering new places to dine and meeting the chefs and restaurant owners who are passionate about their food and beverages. I also love learning their tips and tricks and seeing the food-production process. I’m always out with friends exploring new foodie places around the Gold Coast and I appreciate good quality, locally sourced ingredients. What do you do in your down time? I love a bit of pampering in a luxurious day spa, followed by a bite to eat of course! with a glass of bubbles and a crossword is my thing. Favourite inspirational quote? “Live in the now.”

Roseanna Kokshoorn Managing Director Ultimate Events and President of Women in Tourism What does your role entail? As a business owner you do anything and everything. Maintaining happy clients and staff are my priories. What has been your biggest achievement? Achieving the success and tremendous growth and industry recognition of Ultimate Events; my business journey is far from finished. Having nurtured Ultimate Events from a desk at my parents’ home into company that now finds its home in a large warehouse and office on the Gold Coast, and managing a team that runs events Australia-wide is something I will always be proud of. What do you do in your down time? This year is my year to find down time, reconnect with the things I love doing and spending time with family and friends. Favourite inspirational quote? “No one succeeds without effort ... Those who succeed owe their success to perseverance.” - Ramana Maharshi

February 2016

COVER FEATURE

with Justin Fankhauser

Your guide to having a There’s a mind-blowing love affair every woman simply must have and that’s the one with herself. Here’s how… s she walked into the crowded room there are many shadows and reflections. The shadow of a silhouette shimmered in the light, as she walked closer her mind wandered, her palms sweaty, fast heart, fear of getting caught, is this where the affair would start? She took a step forward then stopped with hesitation. With confidence she stepped forward and her eyes sparkled to discover that her new lover was her own reflection in the mirror. She realised the best love affair was with herself. This is Debbie Majella Nolan’s story.

February 2016

The Gold Coast woman has suffered immense grief in the past three years, with the murder of her sister, death of her step father and emotional abuse at the hands of her husband. “In 2013 I was having a difficult time in my marriage as my husband was angry with the world and I was being emotionally abused,” she said. “Men are complicated and we were in love, but then he became very complacent and had an addiction to porn. I felt he had no respect for me so I moved into the spare room. It wasn’t good. “Then in June last year, my step father

died two days after an horrific car accident. It was the worst day of my life to see him in ICU. It broke my step-sister, Nadia’s, heart. I had lost my father 25 years before and felt her pain. “Nadia and I planned the funeral, and as we slept in the same bed at night and cried, we both realised we wanted a better life. Nadia was with her partner for four years and was also the victim of emotional abuse from this man. For two years we spoke about her leaving him, but she had lost all confidence in herself. “But three weeks after our father’s death, she finally left him. She was looking

I know 80 per cent of the women I work with are unhappy in their relationships and have no self-love for themselves, so I simply started sharing what I knew and what had worked for me

What’s self-love anyway?

an affair forward to a holiday, but was terribly upset and went to visit her ex. In July 2015, Nadia and her ex-partner were both found dead at his residence. She had been shot multiple times.” It was after Debbie’s marriage almost ended that she started having a love affair with herself. “My love tank was empty and I was the only person who could fill it. So I started a daily journal and changed my eating to healthier choices as I had also gained weight. Having done an NLP practitioner program, I knew what I had to do … Change my thinking and stop putting

As cliche as it sounds, you can’t love another person until you love yourself. That’s the word from psychotherapist and Bare Hands Practical Life Strategies co-owner Roxanie Lebsanft. “Fill your own cup first and fill the cups of others with the overflow. Trying to fill cups for people from a near-empty cup yourself leads to chronic health conditions, relationship breakdowns and conflict. It doesn’t work,” she says. “Strange as it seems, have you ever noticed that the more you start taking care of yourself, the more people start complimenting you, showing appreciation and wanting to be helpful? This isn’t a coincidence. Others will respond in like kind so if you have the love affair going on inside, you’ll attract more of it on the outside.” Roxanie shares her thoughts on self-love and how we can all fill our love tanks. What is self-love? The Greeks described it as one of the six types of love, Philautia. There are two types, one which is self-obsessed, fame and fortune driven and leads to narcissism; one they described as very unhealthy. The other, is one they believed enhanced your capacity to love. The idea was if you like yourself and feel secure in yourself, you will have plenty of love to give others (as is reflected in the Buddhist-inspired concept of ‘self-compassion’). Or, as Aristotle put it,“All friendly feelings for others are an extension of a man’s feelings for himself”. Ultimately, I think self-love is treating yourself with compassion, listening to your own needs, and taking responsibility for them and owning the right to express and meet those needs appropriately for contentment, health and balance. The more able one is to achieve this, the more they’ll receive compassion and

myself down so I could build my selfworth,” she says. “I developed a self-nurturing approach to my life with daily walks, meditation, bubble baths and a lot of “me” time, and cooking food that fed my body and mind. EFT (emotional freedom techniques) was, and still is, a daily part of my day. “Loving myself is to nurture and honour me.” Debbie – the founder of Best Love Affair - started sharing what she knew when women kept asking her how she did it. “I know 80 per cent of the women

care from others too, having greater capacity to give it themselves. Do many women know about it and what are the benefits? Few women know about it early in life. It’s conditioned out of us culturally. It’s usually not until women hit their late 30s and 40s that they start to realise the necessity of caring for themselves and not relying on others to do it for them. Women are hard-wired to nurture and be sensitive to the needs of others. The benefits of putting ourselves at the top of our list is that we stay balanced in mind and body, and are able to put our best foot forward in our relationships, our work and the things that truly have value to us. The moment we let that slip, we lose our capacity and ability to shine for others too. What is a love tank? When we cherish something, nurture and appreciate it, it will thrive and bloom. It starts with ourselves. When we start blooming our scent attracts and nurtures many around us. Fill your love tank by cherishing you - you’re worth it (regardless of who you are, what you’ve done or where you’ve come from). What are some self-love activities we can all do? It’s often the simplest activities that reap the most reward. Something as simple as asking yourself,“How are you today (self)?” or “How are things going for you in this moment?”,allowing the time to reflect inwards, and hear the answer and be present to what’s there, then taking note can make all the difference. Simply stopping and listening to your own feelings, thoughts and observing your behaviour can provide the biggest clues to what needs to change or stay the same. Stop. Ask. Listen. Roxanie Lebsanft (G.Dip.Couns,B.HSc,A. Dip.Hom,Dip.Bow,A.Mus.A,Cert.IV.TAE)

I work with are unhappy in their relationships and have no self-love for themselves, so I simply started sharing what I knew and what had worked for me.” This year Debbie is excited for what lies ahead in her personal and business life, a far cry from where has come from. Her marriage is slowly getting back on track and the couple are planning a trip to Europe. She is also going to Bali with a girlfriend and wants to plan an adventure to Melbourne, buy her dream car (a BMW) and “eat, pray, love” every day. Life is looking good and all because of an affair…with herself.

February 2016

REAL LIFE

The world needs more love letters

Love letters are one of the most thoughtful gestures you could ever do for a loved one – or a stranger. See how one woman is helping to spread the love er mission is simple. Make love famous. American Hannah Brencher, the creator of More Love Letters moved to New York City after graduating from college positive all her dreams would come true, but instead she suffered the horrendous lows of depression. So she started journaling and getting all her thoughts down on paper - in letters to herself. The next thing that happened would make love famous. “I found myself ripping the letters out and leaving them all over New York City for people to find. I left them everywhere: Coffee shops. Libraries. Coat pockets in department stores. I liked to imagine who might find those letters,” she says on her blog. “The idea took on a life of its own after I blogged about it. My inbox was filled with the most heartbreaking stories I’ve ever encountered after I published a simple question on my blog: Do you need someone to write you a love letter today? Just ask,” she says. The author of the book The World Needs More Love Letters, says people don’t need to feel alone and now she has a band of merry love letter writers helping spread the word. It’s the month of love and celebrating it in any way that means the most to you and your loved ones. Letter writing is one of the oldest forms of communication and expressing love. So we thought it only apt to get on the letter-writing bandwagon and give you some hot tips on how to write one for your special someone. RSVP’s dating and relationship expert, John Aiken recommends trying this: Be you: Your partner loves you for who you are. When starting out your love letter, just be yourself and explain your feelings in your own words.You don’t need to be the next Shakespeare in the making. Many beautiful love letters haven’t got past the thoughts in someone’s head due to stage fright. Just put pen to paper and get writing. Be raw: Don’t be afraid to open up your inner most feelings – that’s what writing a love letter is all about. Share your feelings, embrace them and own them. It’s OK to feel vulnerable. Your loved one will appreciate your honesty and openness. Take your time: In this day and age of social media, texting and email, we tend to run on auto-pilot. Communication is fast, often reactive and immediate. When penning your love letter, get in the zone. Slow down, breathe and let your feelings flow. Get in touch with February 2016

yourself and with your feelings. This will help you to express yourself in an authentic, meaningful way. Plot it out: If you run out of steam after the first paragraph, then take inspiration from plotting a novel – look back to the past and how you met, comment about the present and anticipate the joys of the future. Presentation: Express your style. A love letter can be anything you want it to be – scribbled on the back of an envelope, crafted on parchment with beautiful coloured pens and pencils, or just a few sentences on scrap paper.

Need some more help? If you’re having trouble finding the right words, why not take a cue from the experts? Here are 10 of the most romantic love quotes you’ll ever encounter. Get ready for a swoon fest. l “You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” - Dr Seuss l “So it’s not gonna be easy. It’s going to be really hard; we’re gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, every day. You and me ... every day.” Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook l “It was love at first sight, at last sight, at ever and ever sight.” ― Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita l “You make me want to be a better man.” —Melvin Udall, As Good As It Gets l “It is really rare to find someone you really, really love and that you want to spend your life with and all that stuff that goes along with being married. I am one of those lucky people. And I think she feels that way too. So the romantic stuff is easy because you want them to be happy.” - Harry Connick Jr l “Love is like the wind, you can’t see it but you can feel it.” ― Nicholas Sparks, A Walk To Remember l “If I had a flower for every time I thought of you ... I could walk through my garden forever.” - Alfred Tennyson l “So, I love you because the entire universe conspired to help me find you.” - Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist l “Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get— only with what you are expecting to give—which is everything.” - Katharine Hepburn, Me: Stories Of My Life l “True love is rare, and it’s the only thing that gives life real meaning.” - Nicholas Sparks, Message in a Bottle 18

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FEBRUARY IS A GREAT TIME FOR NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS! February, the holidays are a distant memory, you are well and truly back to the daily grind. Keeping your New Years Resolutions on track can be overwhelming. Maybe you set some goals January 1, lived and breathed them for three and a half weeks…then the kids went back to school, your commitments started back up again, life got crazy and you couldn’t justify spending time on yourself when your family were so busy. It’s not too late to reinstate your resolutions for 2016. Try these 5 tips from PRIDE Physiotherapy and Nutrition: 1. Make a plan: it’s not too late to plan HOW you intend to reach your New Year’s Resolutions. New Years Resolutions, put simply, are goals, at PRIDE we encourage our clients to set goals, we love goals, big juicy, exciting, scary goals…BUT importantly we insist that our clients have a plan to meet those goals. Remember failing to plan is planning to fail. Align your values with your goals. Write down what behaviours you need to exhibit daily to get the outcome you desire and then…DO THEM. 2. Visualise it: ask yourself “How will I feel when I achieve this goal?” And, perhaps just as motivating, “How will I feel if I don’t achieve it?” Use these visualisations to help when your momentum falters. 3. It doesn’t have to be all or nothing: don’t get trapped by thinking that if you have one bad day or make one poor choice the race is over. Be realistic, expect bumps in the road and plan for the worst. No-one is perfect, go easy on yourself. You can only fail if you quit. Be focused but flexible. A step in the right direction is better than standing still.

4. Ask for help: get your partner/family/friends on board. Challenges are more fun if you have someone to share the experience with…motivate each other and celebrate each other’s successes. If you can’t find someone to share your goal in your current circle of influence, reach outside this circle; cooking classes, yoga studios or Facebook groups are a few examples of great sources of people who may share your goals. 5. Remember what strategies have worked for you in the past: think of something you’ve had success with previously. Maybe it was cooking, school, a job, helping someone understand something. What were some of the qualities and attributes you exhibited to obtain that success? Whether it was patience, planning, tenacity, creativity or adaptability, you already possess a personality trait that can help you now.

Bonus Tip - Remember there is no perfect

time to start: Don’t wait until January 1 2017 to have another go at sticking to your New Years Resolutions, start now! You can do it!!

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February 2016

Look better, feel better and perform at your best so you never need to “see a physio“

SHOPPING

things we love I HEART YOU Heart earrings with Swarovski crystals, $115, Heart pendant with Swarovski crystals, $95, Mariana Paradise Point P 5564 1400

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FASHION

with Elizabeth McMahon

Sort your Valentine’s Day date outfit

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AFFINITAS unlined wire bra, $60, and skirted thong // $40 // affinitas.com MARIAM SEDDIQUE embossed skirt // $149 // and sweat shirt // $399 // thefirstthread.com.au

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Being a hopeless romantic, Valentine’s Day is one of my favourite days of the year … flowers, cards, gifts, perfumes and, oh, what to wear! Before we jump into what to wear, let’s find out where Valentine’s Day originated from. When I was younger I just thought it was a day where everyone wore red dresses and didn’t know the meaning behind it.The day of romance we call Valentine’s Day and is named after a Christian martyr and goes back to the 5th century, but had its origins in the Roman holiday Lupercalia. Meanwhile, I have rounded up a few dresses and accessories for that special date to give you inspiration so you look gorgeous.Traditionally, and being romantic colours, reds and pinks are commonly worn. However, I think you can wear anything as long as you feel romantic and look stylish. Whether you are heading out to a movie, lunch, picnic, candlelit dinner with your man or just a night with your girlfriends, keep it classic, romantic and playful. There are also some romantic, sweet and flirty accessories you can wear with your frocks. Love-heart-shaped jewellery and a nude pair of heels are a must.These will go with every outfit. Don’t forget a pair of sunglasses and a hat if you decide to go for a picnic lunch. If you don’t have time to shop, then a LBD with red lipstick or a white cocktail dress with natural makeup and soft pink lipstick are romantic too. Or just skip the day activities and dinner, and go straight to wearing sexy lingerie. If you need assistance to find that “it” outfit, contact me at elizabeth@ elizabethmcmahon.com.au or visit me at my studio 3/63 Thomas Drive, Chevron Island.

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BEAUTY STYLE

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Dandi cosmetic bag, Krinkle, $21.95, krinkle.com.au

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Bath Brew, Cranmore Home, $15.95, cranmorehome.com.au

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February 2016

FASHION STYLE

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COLOUR PARTY JOHN CAVILL pink gown // $695 // John Cavill Marina Mirage 5532 4405 // and Margarita earrings // $239 // Mariana 5564 1400

February 2016

Love is in the air CASEY TANSWELL strapless velvet dress // $350 // ADRENALIN BOUTIQUE 5591 6355 // and ring // $79 // and earrings // $149 // MARIANA 5564 1400

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BELL OF THE BALL Stokes Thompson Design strapless gown // $850 // STOKES THOMPSON DESIGN 0416 229 000 // and earrings // $189 // and bracelet // MARIANA 5564 1400 27

February 2016

Valentine’s Day

gift guide MIRRA BOUTIQUE Sun Safe style by Morgan & Taylor $69 Mirra Boutique Paradise Point P 5564 2676

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MIRRA BOUTIQUE Adorne s/s heart necklace $29.95 Mirra Boutique Paradise Point P 5564 2676

MY JEWELLERY SHOP Palas charm in copper & S/S $33 myjewelleryshop.com.au

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February 2016

FR EE

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MIRRA BOUTIQUE Stylish sun protection by Morgan & Taylor $35 Mirra Boutique Paradise Point P 5564 2676

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HAIR AND MAKE UP with Amanda Higl reating the perfect red lip takes a little know-how and with these few easy steps you can do red lips like a pro. There is a red for everyone, but there is also a key to finding the perfect hue for you and your skin tone: Warm or olive complexion: Go for fireengine reds with orange undertones. Fair or cool complexion: Look for a cherry red with blue undertones. Dark-skinned ladies: You are the chosen ones as any tone for you is amazing. Now that you are on your way with the right shade, here’s what you need to do: Step 1: Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. Every building needs a good foundation. To ensure perfection, prevent bleeding and create the perfect surface apply some lip balm (my personal fave is pawpaw ointment), leave it for five minutes and then remove with a tissue. For severely dry lips, do a light exfoliation to remove any flaky skin then apply the ointment for five minutes as mentioned. Step 2: Apply a long-lasting red lip liner over your entire lip for extra hold. Step 3: Apply your red lipstick. Step 4: To prevent bleeding

Red lips

you will love Nothing says Valentine’s Day like red, so here is the perfect guide to getting a luscious lip-smacking red pout

use a clean eyeliner brush and apply translucent powder around your lip line. Simply dip the brush into the powder and trace the outside of the lip line. Step 5: If you prefer a more luscious-

looking lip apply a clear or dark pink lip gloss to make those lips pop. Keep in mind the gloss can transfer so to keep them kissable forfeit the gloss and pucker up. Happy Valentine’s Day. amandahiglhairandmakeup.com.au

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February 2016

SUCCESS

5 ways to find peace of mind by the stars

Peace of mind is at the heart of happiness, so how do you find contentment? It’s in the stars, says astrologer Patsy Bennett.

ARIES You’re an upbeat, dynamic character, but can have a short fuse. Blow off steam with physical activities: Choose gym workouts, walks or kick-boxing. Consider assertiveness classes if aggression is an issue. Balance highimpact workouts with calming activities such as reading, gardening or cooking. Achieve work-life balance; schedule relaxation. TAURUS You’re a practical, earthy character, but can get restless when you feel stuck in a rut or you obsess over ideas. Ground yourself in nature with bushwalks or simply by sitting under a tree. Allow yourself to let go of recurring thoughts; consider meditation. Be aware of karma; keep a clear conscience and be conscious of your actions and their impact. Indulge your senses with scents and oils. GEMINI You’re skilled at multi-tasking and you can exhaust yourself. Look after your nerves with a herbal tonic from a naturopath or doctor. Avoid skipping meals and eat a balanced diet. Calm an agitated mind with relaxing visualisation techniques. Adopt breathing techniques that can lead to a calm outlook. Avoid over-working. CANCER You’re a caring soul, but you tend to look after everyone else and forget to self-nurture. Put yourself at the top of your nurturing schedule. It’s not selfish, it’s practical. Prepare comforting and grounding meals: Eat with family or friends when possible. Enjoy swims or walks on the beach, by a river or a lake. Meditate. February 2016

LEO You love to shine and life can become a whirlwind. Recognise when you’re exhausted and bolster energy levels with superfoods. Although you appear selfconfident, you can lack self-esteem, so practice positive self-talk. Be prepared to agree to disagree if conflict arises. Avoid pandering to your fears; be prepared to shine. VIRGO Ensure you balance your analytical ideas with realistic plans to avoid fixating on details. Enjoy communing with nature. Organise your itinerary to create more “me” time. Avoid obsessing over every detail; be prepared to be spontaneous too. Be forgiving: Of yourself, most of all. Avoid overt self-criticism. LIBRA To avoid indecision, try to combine your innovative ideas with practicalities. Make decision-making easier: List “pros” and a “cons”. Indulge in life’s pleasures, but avoid over-indulgence. Practice the wisdom of acceptance. Calm your mind with yoga, music and creativity. Give yourself a break: You don’t always have to be the peacemaker. SCORPIO Passionate and intense, you crave peace of mind when drama prevails. Call “time out” when a situation is becoming dramatic. Relax with massage or reflexology. Keep a clear conscience; this promotes positive action and limits regrets. Learn self-calming techniques such as breathing exercises. 30

SAGITTARIUS You aim high, but can become disappointed unless you set yourself realistic goals. Sports and recreation are integral to your peace of mind. Envisage already having obtained your goals; then it’s a case of doing it. Think: Abundance, not scarcity, and fulfil your prophecy. Keep a notebook handy to jot down bright ideas. CAPRICORN You seek prestige and success, and can push yourself hard, but must avoid being tough on yourself. Ensure your self-talk is positive. Feel “grounded” by literally getting your feet on the ground. Be fulfilled by ensuring your activities align with your values. Believe in yourself and seek likeminded people. Practice activities that promote wellbeing and confidence, such as tai chi. AQUARIUS You’re the zodiac’s maverick and yet you also have a no-nonsense side which, combined, can bring peace of mind. Let your free spirit run free: Schedule regular getaways. Make time for fun and activities that promote lateral thinking, such as comedy nights. Enjoy being individualistic. Practice awareness of the present; this will help avoid worry and distractions. PISCES You’re a dreamer and an idealist, but life can appear harsh unless you’re realistic too. Practice art and crafts, write, make music and dance. Enjoy film nights and book clubs. Ditch bad habits that only delay facing reality. Enjoy the soothing effects of water: Swimming, laying on the beach, spas and showers.

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How to have a strong loving relationship In the business of life and when the magical pheromones of a new relationship wear off, how do we maintain a strong relationship with our partner? By Dr Elen Apthomas, holistic nutritional doctor

e all love the fireworks that ignite the beginning of many relationships but research tells us that sadly these are just chemicals in our brain and they will wear off after about 18 months. So then what? According to psychologists there are five love languages; words of affection (verbal and written expressions of love), physical touch (massage, hugs, etc), quality time (going out to dinner or simply talking about your day), acts of service (tidying the house, cooking a beautiful meal and so on) and gifts (which although material still require lots of thought). Each of us speak all five love languages but have only one of these as our primary love language, which is crucial to be satisfied for us to feel truly loved. In order to express

to our partner how much we love them we need to understand their primary love language and express our love to them in this way. Often in a relationship each partner speaks a different love language. If our partner expresses love in a way that isn’t our primary love language then they may love us, but we don’t truly feel that they do. This can erode even the best of relationships leaving us feeling unappreciated and with an empty love tank. It’s when times are tough that you need this love tank to be full to get you through. In order to work out your own and your partner’s primary love language think about what you and they seem to appreciate the most and get the most excited by or oppositely what you and they complain

about. If they ask to do activities with you then they like quality time, if they complain that you don’t appreciate what they do for you they probably have words of affection as their primary language and need you to verbally tell them how much you appreciate them or write it in a card. If there are complaints about the house always being messy, then acts of service is their most likely language. Each of the five love languages are important but if our primary love language is being satisfied our hearts are full, the world seems like a better place and we make better partners, colleagues, parents and friends. Wishing you a wonderful love-filled Valentine’s Day.

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Meet the travel guru You can ask David Smith anything about travel and he will have an answer for you eet Travel on Capri’s David Smith; travel and holidays are the reason he gets up in the morning. He is an award-winning expert and also Get it magazine’s resident travel guru. Ask him anything and he will be able to tell you – where’s the best place to travel to in 2016? Where should you take your family? What’s the best overseas destination for affordability? How can I book a high-end holiday in Australia? Can you help me holiday at home? The aficionado knows the industry so well he was recently awarded the 2015 helloworld Associate Manager of the Year gong, cementing the agency’s place as one of Queensland’s top travel specialists and showcasing him as a dedicated leader and industry expert. That’s how committed he is to his clients, team and suppliers to make sure they get the best deals and advice when it comes to travel. “What an honour. It is really humbling to be recognised for the work I have done; for the love of the industry and for the results

February 2016

What an honour. It is really humbling to be recognised for the work I have done; for the love of the industry and for the results that our jobs bring to our staff and our clients. that our jobs bring to our staff and our clients,” he says. “I am very proud of my whole team for their ongoing hard work and their focus on continually innovating to be ahead of the pack. The travel industry is a dynamic, challenging and rewarding space to work in and this award is further proof that we do it for our clients and suppliers. I couldn’t be happier,” he says. A proud member of helloworld, the Travel on Capri team has a wealth of knowledge at their fingertips and access to market-leading deals and experiences around Australia and the world. P 5592 3349 or email sales@traveloncapri.com.au

GET GOING

The minute you take the plane from Rome to Palermo and breathe in the air, you are transcended to another time and place. This is where your revolution begins.

Picture perfect:

Sicily is a must visit Desiring an experience to revolutionise the way you look at life and want a journey accompanied with culture and food? Look no further, writes Carmela Dâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Amore

icily is one of the biggest islands in the Mediterranean. It is raw and undiscovered, and tells you a story of history from the moment you step off the plane in its capital city of Palermo. Palermo is more than 2700 years old and is the porthole to history, culture, architecture and gastronomy. The beautiful capital city is located in the northwest of the island right by the gulf of Palermo in the Tyrrhenian Sea. Distinguishing the influence of Arabic, Greek, Norman, Roman, Spanish, Saracens and the Phoenicians, gothic majestic Baroque churches, palaces and nightlife, the city is rich in art, music and food, and tourists are attracted to it for its absolute uniqueness. The locals speak Italian and the native language Palermitano, which is a Sicilian dialect - a romantic language descending from Latin. It is the only surviving language of the italic language family and different to Italian. The minute you take the plane from Rome to Palermo and breathe in the air, you are transcended to another time and place. This is where your revolution begins.

February 2016

GET GOING

The best seasons to visit are in spring and autumn as the weather is perfect for travelling. You can rough it or live like a local, lodging either in a hotel, apartment, unit or hostel, Palermo has a type of accommodation to best suit your stay. Once outside the airport, you will be mesmerised with the aromas of food, brioche and espresso coffee. Train is the best way to go into the city of Palermo and takes about 40 minutes. The trains in Sicily are amazing. They are made for the traveller, the cost is affordable and you are also treated to views of the coast in all its elegance. Imagine being on a train with the locals, drinking in the gorgeous coastline views, passing through rustic towns that tell a story all of their own, while eating fresh brioche or arancini … what perfection. February 2016

Sicily is a place where you are able to stretch your imagination and be challenged to broaden your horizons. You will be enchanted by life and seduced by the culture and gastronomy – so much so, you’ll never want to leave. Entering the city from the airport, you will see be amazed to see it is a real culture shock that this city even exists. It’s elegant, old, rustic, new, civilised, uncivilised and breathtaking all at the same time. You can either plan your experience with your travel agent or just wing it. But a visit to the main attractions is a must. For the cultural connoisseur check out Teatro Massimo, which takes in opera, ballet, concerts and more. The season runs from November to May. Monreale attracts thousands of tourists all over the world all year round due to 34

the perfect Mediterranean weather. The coastline is lined with small beaches and the water is full of rich blue and green hues. Make sure you check out these beaches: Mondello, Aspra and Isola delle Femmine. The Catacombe dei Cappuccini, the piazzas and the breathtaking harbour are also worth a visit. Don’t miss the mustsee Monte Pellegrino, it is nestled in the mountains, and be sure to take a trip up to Santa Rosalia, which is the patron saint of Palermo. Santa Rosalia is credited for saving the city from a deadly plague. She is known to the locals as La Santuzza and lived most of her life in a cave on the mountain praying for the souls of the city. Her remains where uncovered and are now housed in a small chapel built around her cave. The roof of the cave drips water

yo Apa u r do r to t fro w -vi m n s P m in S it li ale or ic st rm e i w ca ho ly, h he o b n’ t s er n y ein t g po e o g o rt are u t on pa s y t ou st ou hre ch . e

to Top vi 3 sit p in lac Si e s ci ly

The Catacombe dei Cappuccini, the piazzas and the breathtaking harbour are also worth a visit. Don’t miss the must-see Monte Pellegrino, it is nestled in the mountains, and be sure to take a trip up to Santa Rosalia, which is the patron saint of Palermo.

along a special steel cobweb designed for drainage and it is considered good luck to be dripped on as the liquid is believed to be miraculous. Even if you are not religious it is well worth the 14km drive from the town up the mountain to experience the views and the fresh air. Food is the heart and soul of Palermo and on every corner there is a street vendor, cafe or restaurant. My friend Mario Puccio, with his family, owns Ristorante Puccio, in Capaci, and is renowned for his authentic cooking. Looking for star quality when it comes to your food? Patrizia Di Benedetto is the owner of Bye Bye Blues in Mondello and is the only female chef in Sicily to have a Michelin Star. Italian music is harmonious and full of melody that talks to your soul. It fills the

streets and needs no translation. This is what being on holidays is all about. If you are unsure about sight-seeing and travelling, a local guide can introduce you to another dimension of this amazing universe so you become totally immersed with the culture and food. You will never be the same again after you visit this part of the world and here’s the magical part - you will take culture, history, food and the love of life back home to enjoy like a true Italian. About Carmela D’Amore Carmela D’Amore is a Sicilian chef and the daughter of Sicilian immigrants. Australian born with 40 years’ experience in small business she currently owns a restaurant in Sorrento on the Mornington Peninsula and is the published author of Carmela’s Cucina Povera. 35

CEFALU One of the most beautiful places to visit in Sicily … imagine having holiday snaps taken here. Cefalu is picture perfect, postcard quality. Think narrow medieval streets, delicious local delicacies, interesting shops and a public beach. Only an hour from Palermo, you’ll definitely be glad you stopped here. Check out: The inviting sandy beach.

MONREALE Right next door to Palermo you’ll find this iconic place that overlooks the Golden Shell, a valley renowned for its olive, orange and almond orchards. You’ll need at least a few hours here so you can explore it in its entirety and also grab a bite to eat. The food is to die for so make sure you’re around at lunch or dinner time. Check out: Cathedral of Monreale and the beautiful 12th century features.

NEBRODI MOUNTAINS The most lush forest region of Sicily, the Nebrodi Mountains are north of Etna (another place not to miss). Apart from mountains, lakes and spectacular scenery, it is also home to Mount Etna, Europe’s largest and most active volcano. The best part about this area is the detachment from society…exploring this region will offer different experiences you wouldn’t imagine from a Mediterranean holiday. Here’s where you’ll be at one with nature while also experiencing amazing churches, food and local hospitality. Check out: Monte Soro (1847m) and pull into the little villages along the way to try the sumptuous food. February 2016

with Lauren Paris

f you’ve been wondering if your eyes are playing tricks on you and you’ve been seeing double, or even triple, don’t worry because you’re probably noticing what many other Gold Coasters – and visitors – have been noticing lately. There seems to be an ever-increasing number of twins and triplets popping up in our great city. It seems everywhere you look, twins or double prams are making an appearance. The Gold Coast Multiple Birth Association – a group that supports families of multiples, providing resources, information sessions, events and play dates, among other things, has experienced an increase in its membership and is behind the formation of countless new friendships as multiple mums (and dads) meet up at play dates to share advice and tips. Naomi Apanui, a mother of four – including triplets - is the Gold Coast Multiple

It is so important that parents of twins and triplets know that there is support out there and a place they can ask absolutely anything and get answers from other families who may have gone through the same situation. Dr Drew Moffrey, whose practice is locatedat Pindara Hospital, specialises in high-risk pregnancies and says he is definitely seeing an increase in twin pregnancies. “[I’ve] personally never delivered more than a set a day, but a few months ago there were three sets of twins in the special care nursery at the same time, which was very special,” Dr Moffrey says.

Seeing double You’re not the only one! There’s a multiple baby boom on the Gold Coast

(or triple)?

Birth Association (GCMBA) president and also Queensland’s Higher Order Multiples (HOM) contact (for families with triplets or more). She says the club hasas seen a steady rise in membership. “We have seen a large increase in membership over 2015 and we now have more than 80 member families,” she says. She attributes the club’s membership rise to the power of social media. The GCMBA’s private Facebook group, where parents can chat and trade advice and tips, now has more than 318 members. One group of multiple mums and their adorable bubs meet fortnightly on the Gold Coast and are always quite a spectacle when they’re out and about.

Dr Moffrey attributes the spike in multiple births to the increase in IVF pregnancies and women putting off starting a family until they’re into their 30s or 40s. “The increasing age of mothers is causing an increase. As a woman gets older, she is more likely to have twins. This is because as a woman ages, the physiological changes in her hormones changes to predispose more to twins,” Dr Moffrey says. While fraternal twins (two separate eggs that are fertilised) can be hereditary, according to Dr Moffrey, it is a little different with identical twins as they are not genetic – they’re more spontaneous. “Identical twins are the one egg that splits into two. Non-identical twins are the ones that are increasing,” he says.

Twin facts f DCDA twins (often referred to as fraternal as they have separate sacs and separate placentas) can actually be identical. f To determine whether same-sex multiples are identical, a simple mouth swab test can be sent via post. The price range for the test is $120-$200. f Twins can be delivered naturally. f Twins can be breastfed (breast size has no bearing on whether a mother’s supply will be adequate. It’s all about supply and demand, education, awareness and empowerment). February 2016

f Some parents of multiples paint the toe nails of their baby twins/triplets to help identify who’s who. This certainly helps when you’re sleep deprived and trying to work out who was fed/nappy changed last. f Many twins/triplets are born prematurely and so spend time in NICU or SCN (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit/Special Care Nursery). f Not all twins look the same. Fraternal twins (two separate eggs fertilised) may look as similar as any other siblings do. 36

According to Dr Moffrey, babies born prematurely also have a much greater chance of survival these days and there’s also a great reduction in long-term complications of premature babies. “You’re still always very cautious whenever anyone has twins but the outcomes are vastly improved to those of even 10 years ago,” he says. Naomi says modern technology and better hospital facilities has

Paris Twins . Picture: Atomicbutterfly Photography

KIDS

contributed to more successful birth outcomes. “Usually [multiples] are born prior to 36 weeks and have lower birth weights and this can mean longer hospital stays,” she says. “On the Gold Coast, we are lucky enough for the new University Hospital to have a Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, which means local families no longer need to travel to Brisbane to access these services. “Some of our families have their twins and triplets as early as 28 weeks. It is so important that parents of twins and triplets know that there is support out there and a place they can ask absolutely anything and get answers from other families who may have gone through the same situation.”

Paris family by Kat Tait Photography

Naomi and her husband with their daughter Virginia, 6, and triplet boys Harry, Cain and Tyrone, 4.

Triple the family fun Naomi Apauni says people are quite curious about multiples and families with lots of children. “We would get stopped a lot in public when the kids were younger as often people had never met triplets. Nowadays people often stop us to check that they are all ours and ask whether triplets run in the family - which they do - the kids have triplet uncles,” she says. “We find most people are just curious, which I completely understand and for the most part, people are polite and offer encouragement. When they were younger some people asked to take photos as we had a fourseater pram, which was quite an eyesore!”

Four under 3 Gold Coast Mum blogger Lauren Paris discovered she and her husband were expecting twins when their other two children were aged 1 and 2. “It was a huge surprise to find out our planned third baby was in fact twins,” she says. “Fortunately, after a smooth pregnancy – other than gestational diabetes that was diet controlled – my twin girls were born at 37 weeks and one day, after I was induced, at Gold Coast University Hospital. “After a successful natural delivery and natural breech delivery 13 minutes later, everything was fine with the girls (who weighed 6lb6oz and 6lb3oz) and we were home on day three. “Even now when out and about, as well as the friendly type who are curious and full of praise and kind words about my children, I often hear ‘better you than me’ or ‘oh, you poor thing’. “I think, why – because I’m fortunate enough to have four healthy and happy children? I’d say I’m pretty darn lucky! Yes, it’s been absolute chaos but we feel like we’ve won the Lotto. After all, what could possibly be cuter than one squishy newborn? One more, two more, three more…at once?” She’s pictured here with husband Sam, Jacinta, 5, Jordan, 3, and twins Natalia and Victoria, 2. Lauren Paris is a married mum of four children under 5 – including twins - and a multi-award-winning journalist and editor, who also runs parenting and lifestyle blog called GoldCoastMum.com

Experience that makes all the difference Gynaecology Infertility Obstetrics Dr Tim O’Dowd P

55396333 Suite 1, Level 1, Pindara Place, 13 Carrara Street, Benowa E: drtimodowd@bigpond.com W: www.timodowd.com DrTimODowd 37

February 2016

HEALTH

Love yourself

skinny

You want to lose weight, be skinnier and feel sexier but where do you start? Emotional eating specialist Magic Barclay gives us the skinny on loving yourself thin

es, according to weight loss expert and author Magic Barclay, it is possible to love yourself skinny – and now is the perfect time to do it. While there is a lot of information out there on weight loss and how to do it effectively, Magic found it wasn’t strenuous exercise and crazy diets that helped her lose 80kg. “The first crucial step in unveiling your skinny body is to map out who you are. Sit somewhere quiet and peaceful. Reflect on what you want to do with your skinny body, how you will feel, how you will think about yourself and how you want others to think about you and talk about you. When you have this clear direction you can work out what needs to be done to make it happen,” she says. “Now that you know who you are, you need to start recording the process. Journaling is the second step in unveiling your new body and achieving your weight-loss dreams. This doesn’t mean you need to write pages and pages of emotional mush. You should simply record the major things that happen in your day, how you felt about them and what the results of these events were. “Once you have begun journaling, you can identify patterns in your time, your behaviour and your thought processes. The key to journaling is to be honest with yourself. This is not your high-school assignment, this is the start of an adventure - so no cheating.” Magic says journaling can help you track your weight, nutrition, activity and mindset. You can see clearly what happened, when it happened and what else was going on. Most importantly, you can track how you reacted to it all. The ability to love yourself skinny is driven by these four factors: February 2016

Once you have begun journaling, you can identify patterns in your time, behaviour and your thought processes. The key to journaling is to be honest with yourself.

1 2

Intention: What you aim to do, be, say, feel, think, act on and experience. Your intention can often redesign the best-laid plans you might have. If you are not truly present in what is going on around you, your intentions will change and you may not even notice it. Make your intentions clear, not to everyone else, but to yourself. Motivation: The reason you have for acting or behaving in a particular way. Motivation can be extrinsic (influenced by things around you) or intrinsic (internal). To achieve a skinnier body you need to look at intrinsic motivation. What do you want, feel, see, believe and desire? You are the master of your own destiny. Do you want to actively seek out your goals or do you want to limp along hoping that nothing really derails you? Aspiration: An overriding hope or ambition to achieve something. For example, will you love yourself enough to get to your goal weight and stay there? You need to define your true aspiration. Implementation: Your decision, your plan and your agreement with yourself. Implement everything you have learnt from your self-reflection and journaling.

3 4 38

ADVERTISING PROMOTION

Fall in love with exercise Stay on the bandwagon after making your new-year resolutions with these tips from Jeff Osborne at Vision Bundall love this time of year…It’s sunny, hot, beautiful and the positivity swirling around is inspiring. The especially cool thing is there are so many people who have started an exercise program with great intentions to make this the healthiest year yet. Life is busy and unfortunately the first thing that gets dropped is their exercise regime. It shouldn’t be like that, but it is. Then, before you know it months have passed and you are oficially off the horse. So here are a few tips to make exercise something you look forward to and do for the rest of your life. Start at the beginning Too many people think if they aren’t training like a professional athlete it isn’t worth doing. The key to any exercise program is consistency. Even if you only do 30 minutes once or twice a week, if you keep that up for a year the results will surprise you. The best part is, when you start feeling great that 30 minutes twice a week turns into three times, then four and so on. If this week you can only do 10 minutes a few times, that is 1000 per cent better than doing nothing Be effective with your time If you have nine hours a week to exercise you can afford to do a tonne of different stuff that isn’t that effective. So many people say “do exercise you enjoy”, I disagree. Do something you don’t hate, but make sure you do what works. Effective strength training, a good mix of high and low/moderate cardio and eating right will see some amazing changes. Set goals and milestones How long do you plan to be healthy for? I hope the answer is the rest of your life! Set some small goals that will give you something to work towards (walking a certain distance, tummy measurement, cycling and so on) but remember, you have 30, 40, 50, 60-plus more years of this. So pace yourself and be consistent. Find a social place One of the best ways to fall in love with exercise is to make it social. Go somewhere that you can have a chat, make some friends, develop relationships and enjoy the time. You know things are going well when you are meeting up with your exercise buddies for breakfast and a coffee every week on top of the exercise sessions. If you are into pumping iron, don’t go to a pretty gym, go to a hard-core ironpumping gym. If you are a busy professional, go where other busy professionals go. Read up on healthy eating and exercise Find some blogs, Facebook pages (facebook.com/VisionBundall), 39

Instagram accounts or anything that will keep being active and eating well at the forefront of your mind. When you are surrounded by it you are likely to do it more often. If you’re ready to make a positive change to your life and are looking for a simple, fun, fast way to lose weight, give Jeff a call at Vision Bundall on 5538 4788.

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any people donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t realise that as we get older, it is not just our hearing which declines but also our ability to tell which direction sounds come from, or localisation. This includes localising sound from the side, front or the back. Our ears and brain rely on two main processes to localise side sound sounds. They use a comparison between the volume and time differences between the two ears to do this. A sound coming from one side will seem louder in the ear closer to the sound and softer in the ear further from the sound because our head shadows the sound. Our brain then analyses the volume differences between the ears and gives us an idea on which side the sound is coming from. At the same time the brain is also analysing the timing difference between the ears for telling where high pitched sounds come from. The sound will reach the ear closer to the sound earlier than the other ear and the brain recognises the difference. The shape and positioning of the ear also aids us in localising front and back sounds. The natural design of the outside of the ear, as well as its position is designed to spotlight the sounds in front more than the sounds behind. The folds of skin and cartilage of the ear trap high pitched sounds from the front and direct them towards our ear canals. As we get older we gradually lose our ability to hear high pitched sounds. And that will diminish our ability to locate where sound comes from. Our brains lose the ability to use the timing differences between the sounds reaching our ears and it canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t then analyse where that sound comes from. Our front and back localising is also effected as, although the folds in the skin are collecting the high pitched sounds from the front and directing it towards the ear canal, the inner ear itself is not able to hear them

Why canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t I tell where sound is coming from? and consequently there appears to be little difference in sounds from the front and back. Hearing aids may return the high pitched hearing. However, the most common and effective hearing aid for high pitched hearing loss requires the wearer to place the device on top of the ear. This means that we lose the directional effect of the ear capturing sound naturally from the front and localisation is not restored. Most modern quality hearing aids do have features to help with highlighting sounds in front more than sounds behind. This standard feature is called a directional

microphone and it works by having microphones at the front and back and the hearing aid analysing the timing differences between the two microphones to ascertain which direction the sound is coming from. High end premium hearing aids have this feature as well as another feature which simulates side localisation by analysing timing and sound wave differences So as you get older, you may find it difficult to determine where sounds are coming from. But there is help in the form of modern hearing aids. Come and talk to us about a solution for you.

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You’re invited!

To the fashion event of the year. This March you’re invited to join Get It Magazine in collaboration with Making A Difference (global health group) and enjoy a Fashion Cocktails Evening showcasing the latest in design whilst supporting local charities.

Venue: Date: Time: Tickets:

Palazzo Versace Gold Coast Friday March 25, 2016 6pm Early bird is $65pp – limited numbers Normal price is $75per person

The Event: A Cocktail Fashion evening featuring 4 high end fashion shows from Australia’s leading designers, live music, auctions and lots of prizes to be won. Enjoy a complimentary sparkling white wine on arrival and canapés, with all funds raised going to charity. The charities: The Luke Batty Foundation for Domestic Violence and Destiny Rescue for woman and child trafficking. For more information and tickets please visit try.tilt.com/benefitsoffashion instagram: @mad4globalhealth or like and message us on facebook @madforhealth www.madglobalhealth.com MAJOR PRIZE: Jet Go Charter Airways are giving away 2 x Return airfares to anywhere on the JETGO network which also includes 2 nights accommodation.

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February 2016

LIFESTYLE RECIPES

Every Bite Takes You Home invites you to take a journey with 16 asylum seekers who share their favourite recipes and traditions. Compiled by Gaye Weeden and Hayley Smorgon, this book reminds us that food can unite us all

Feels like home

BUR MACAAN DOUGHNUTS Origin: Somalia INGREDIENTS • 420g flour • 2 tsp instant dry yeast • 770g plain yoghurt • 400g sugar • 500ml water • 1 tsp lemon juice • 1 tbsp ground cardamom • Vegetable oil for frying METHOD Place the flour in a large bowl and add the yeast. Add the yoghurt and stir until well combined. Cover the bowl with cling wrap and allow to sit for an hour, then refrigerate overnight or up to three days. Place the sugar in a saucepan set on a medium heat, then add the water. Boil for 15 minutes. Add the lemon juice and cardamom. Add some oil to a frying pan. Dip your fingers in water and, using your fingertips, pick some dough and form into a little ball with your fingers. You may use 2 teaspoons to shape the dough balls. Drop the balls of dough into the oil. Add enough dough balls to cover the surface of the pan. Fry until golden. Remove from the heat and drop the doughnuts into the sugar syrup. Mix quickly or they will absorb too much syrup. Remove with a slotted spoon and serve.

Photos: Peter Tarasiuk

February 2016

PORK AND PRAWN RICE PAPER ROLLS Origin: Vietnam INGREDIENTS • 100g vermicelli noodles • 12 rice paper sheets • 1 cup Vietnamese mint leaves • 1 bunch chives • 100g bean shoots • 2 x 400g pork fillets, caramelised and sliced • 18 small prawns, cooked and peeled • 2 Lebanese cucumbers, cut lengthways into thick strips • Iceberg lettuce thinly sliced • Fish or hoisin sauce to serve METHOD: Bring a saucepan of water to the boil and add the vermicelli noodles. Cook for 5 minutes, then turn off the heat and allow the vermicelli to stand in the water for a further 5 minutes. Strain in a colander and rinse under cold water, then leave to dry. To assemble the rolls, fill a large bowl with warm water and dip one sheet of rice paper in the water until just softened, then lay it flat on a plate. Place some of the cooked vermicelli noodles, mint leaves, chives, bean shoots, pork fillet slices, prawns, cucumber and lettuce lengthways along the middle of the rice paper. Fold the sides of the rice paper towards the centre over the filling, then roll from bottom to top to form a tight roll. Repeat the process with each rice paper, until filling ingredients have been used up.

FRIED FISH WITH THREE FLAVOUR CHILLI SAUCE

Serve with the dipping sauce.

Origin: Cambodia INGREDIENTS • 1kg small snapper or any other fish • 2 tsp salt • 3 tbsp cornflour • 1 litre vegetable oil for deep frying • 2 cloves garlic finely chopped • 2-4 chilli peppers, ground • 2 tbsp fish sauce • 1 tbsp tamarind paste • 2½ tbsp sugar • Basil, coriander and sliced cucumber to garnish METHOD: Preparing the fish: While still raw, create four diagonal slashes across both sides of the fish and season with salt. Coat the fish with cornflour, removing excess pieces. Deep fry the fish until crispy and golden. Drain the oil using kitchen paper or a drainer and place on flat plate. Preparing the sauce: Heat approximately 1 tablespoon of oil and fry the garlic until brown. Add the ground chilli peppers, fish sauce, tamarind paste and sugar, and heat until boiling. Pour the sauce over the fish. Garnish with the basil and coriander leaves. Serve with the sliced cucumber. 43

February 2016

DINING

Yes, chef! A chef for 19 years, Ben James the man behind the fare flair at Links Hope Island Golf Club where he’s an old hand and favourite with visitors What’s your background as a chef? I started work as kitchen hand at Links way back in 1996 and then began an apprenticeship a year later. I have been lucky to work with a lot of very good chefs during my time. This is my fourth time working at Links. It hasn’t happened intentionally, but just seems to be written in the stars somehow. I’ve had stints on Tamborine Mountain, a few clubs and theme parks and as a commercial cookery trainer for some privately owned RTOs. Why did you become a chef? I had no intention of becoming a chef, I wanted to become a teacher. I didn’t do cooking or hospitality classes at school, I didn’t cook at home – the only interest I had in food was eating it. My Dad was fishing one day and got talking with another fisherman at the beach who happened to be the then sous chef at Links. The conversation led to me being “almost forced” into taking a job as a kitchenhand. After a year and a half of peeling vegetables, making pies and washing dishes, I was offered an apprenticeship. Most memorable moment in your profession? I think for me, there hasn’t been a single moment that sticks out above the rest. Every day in a kitchen environment you can experience something new. There are a lot of fond memories and also horrible days that come to mind, but all of them become learning experiences.It might be people you meet, a new February 2016

way of preparing something, a particular dinner you have cooked for someone, a compliment, a complaint, a piece of equipment that breaks down right before you need it, a practical joke played or conquering an event that in the beginning seemed too big a task to even think about, but at the end you are sitting back with the team and sharing a well-earned beverage and getting ready to do it all over again. Why do you love what you do? I like the creative side of the job, being able to present a dish that not only tastes good, but is aesthetically pleasing also. I like seeing fresh produce delivered and then turning it into something that people will enjoy. What’s the best part about your job? Links has always been a unique property to me. Our client base is so diverse and part of the challenge is trying to cater to such a broad spectrum of people. Favourite food? Pretty much anything slow cooked or braised. Favourite drink? Coffee. Favourite place to eat? At home with my family. What would your last meal be? Probably a big steak with a rich red wine jus and béarnaise sauce. P 5530 9051 to book or go to linkshopeisland.com.au

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Magic Millions Sparkling Ladies Lunch An amazing day for colour, magnificent fashion and the who’s who of Australia attended the Magic Millions Sparkling Ladies Lunch at Marriott Resort and Spa.

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CHAPTER AND VERSE LAUNCH PARTY Surfers Paradise Marriott Resort and Spa recently turned the page to a new chapter of their luxurious resort opening the Gold Coastâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s newest bar Chapter and Verse.

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Lucy Cole hams it up with the vintage entertainers from Lindy Charm School.

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Magic Millions Hats & High Tea Party at QT Colours, feathers and glamour were all on the menu at QT Resort at the spectacular 2016 Magic Millions Hats & High Tea party. Mumm champagne flowed as guests paraded their masterpiece designer outfits at this special highlight of the Magic Millions Carnival. Guests flew in from overseas and around Australia to be part of the fashionistas parade which included a fabulous parade by BLISS Couture.

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liano and Josephine Jues enjoy a m Sy ne Lean m moment special Mum February 2016

GET YOUR STARS

with Patrick Arundell

Get your horoscope H Aquarius January 21 – February 19 This month kicks off with a bang and the influence of the stars can help you to embrace the most individualistic side of your nature. But behind this, the more psychological side of life remains highly charged. By embracing any personal anxieties or frailties you can end this month so much stronger. H Pisces February 19 – March 20 Your desire to open up your world to wider views is going to be extraordinarily strong this month but how you actually go about achieving this is the main issue. Tactics will be very important especially around February 19. One relationship is going to play a major part in all of this but it could be more a meeting of minds than anything romantic.

H Gemini May 21 – June 21 You will experience some very intense energies this month, Gemini. If you find yourself stuck or unsure about which way to go, knowledge or becoming better informed can be significant in aiding your progress. This can be particularly so from mid-month. However, don’t try too hard. Stay natural but committed.

H Libra September 22 – October 23 You need to be enjoying whatever you’re doing this month as just going through the motions is not going to be enough. In fact, you can make some major decisions about where you live, how and who with that can have ramifications for your future. Expenditure may need a degree of selfdiscipline especially around February 8.

H Cancer June 21 – July 22 Your relationship sector continues to be very powerfully activated. It may be early in the year but you could be pleasantly surprised by the level of interaction with others. If you’re single, someone can take on a fascinating attraction. However, in an existing relationship, any undercurrent of control or jealousy can surface and will need tackling.

H Scorpio October 23 – November 22 This is a big month for you, Scorpio. The side of you that can be hugely driven can see major breakthroughs as long as you don’t go against your own deepest emotional needs. If managed effectively, all of this can help to power you forwards.

H LEO July 22 – August 23 As this month begins relationships continue to be in focus but this will not be confined to purely personal interactions. You may find yourself working on some very practical elements of your situation too. Some Leos may start a home-based business. Finances can improve this month with care and the last week of February can be significant in this regard.

H Aries March 20 – April 19 You can find yourself incredibly motivated as this month begins and you will have a fantastic level of willpower. Add to this oodles of charm and doors of opportunity will soon spring open for you. However, stay cautious around February 8 and be mindful of your true values. The last 10 days suggest subtlety will be as important as drive.

H Virgo August 23 - September 22 Your creative urges in the early part of February can be absolutely fantastic. You may also become more conscious of who really matters in terms of your closest involvements. Your ability to make new starts is enhanced and in weeks two and three there may be a sense that nothing is beyond you. However, relationship issues will require sensitivity from February 22.

H Taurus April 20 – May 21 Some wonderful relationship opportunities can open up for you this month Taurus, but especially where you take the initiative. Don’t sit back and wait for life to come to you, be it personally or professionally. So if you feel a spark of attraction to someone, romantically or in terms of their ideas, do be proactive. A more sociable vibe develops in the last 10 days of the month.

H Sagittarius Nov 22 – Dec 22 This can be a month of revelations. Some of these you may readily welcome and embrace, while others can come from people surprising you with their observations about some of your attitudes and behaviours. This may not be particularly comfortable but hard work will bring rewards for you. H Capricorn December 22 – January 20 Your personal charisma is boosted this month and you will sparkle brightly. However, the more businesslike side of your nature also needs to stay mindful of the things that you feel comfortable with deep down. • Read “5 ways to find peace of mind” on page 30”

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SPICE with Sophie Wood

Feeling

sexy

after kids Mum of two and founder of mimideluxe.com Elle Black gives us her hottest tips for a sexy love life would love to give you just one solution that will make all of that pre-children sexiness just ooze back into your life, but in reality the answer to this question is found in a more holistic approach. So here are some tactics you can use to inject some more sexy into your life: Think sexy thoughts: Yes, ladies, let those fantasies run wild. See a hot guy mowing the lawn? There’s no harm in a momentary thought about those muscles. The hot guy is your partner? Even better, let the fantasy continue and build it up into sweaty sex. If you don’t want to fantasise about someone else then play the “fake it ‘til you make it” game. Tell yourself you are going to have a satisfying orgasm tonight. Think about it throughout the day, what it feels like, what sound you’ll be making and how you’ll get there. Partner optional. Wear those sexy clothes: Dress-up games still work for adults. Pull out the lingerie, a piece of clothing or shoes that make you feel sexy. Wear something hot at least once a week and pay attention to how it makes you feel. Grab any opportunity: Often women take longer to climax than our partners and when there are kids around, time is limited. So you may just need to use some modern technology to assist you. Say hello to couple’s vibrators; these will help you reach orgasm faster.

How do you

Please yourself more often: How often do you orgasm alone? If not much, then you are missing out on some great health benefits and the number one way to make yourself feel sexy. A little selfpleasure goes a long way. I dare you to have an orgasm before you do the grocery shopping. You’ll feel lighter on your feet and smile at everyone, making the whole experience so much more pleasurable. Aim for two or three times a week of self-pleasure. If you can’t do it on your own, use a vibrator to help you out.

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LAST WORD

with Petra Williams

Valentine’s Day: A celebration of love or commercialism? It’s the month of love and executive relationship coach Petra Williams gives her take on Valentine’s Day ach year as Valentine’s Day approaches, I find it difficult to keep my food down with the revolting advertising that props up on how giving someone flowers is going to make you irresistible. As I’m sure you know (unless you’ve been hiding under a rock or live in a communist country), every 14th day of February, across Australia and many places of the world, chocolate, flowers and gifts are exchanged between loved ones (and want-to-be loved ones), all in the name of St Valentine. Whether you believe in celebrating Valentine’s Day or not, it’s difficult to miss the array of flowers, pink hearts and cushy cards appearing everywhere around you. Astonishingly (or maybe not so much), most of our Western society laps up the gush without a second thought. It’s not surprising then that Valentine’s Day is the one day that evokes more emotion in us than any other day of the year. For some it is a special day to be showered with love, affection and gifts. Others find it difficult to feel romantic with the forced romance. For many singles, it’s that dreaded day of overindulging on chocolate, wine and bad ’80s love songs to mask the loneliness and pity. February 2016

Whatever the day means to you, let’s take a little look at where Valentine’s Day stems from and if it actually has anything to do with love. The history of Valentine’s Day is obscure and is shrouded by fanciful legends. The day’s roots can be traced back to the around AD270, to the ancient Roman pagan fertility festival of Lupercalia, commemorated on February 15. At the festival the priests sacrificed a goat for fertility and a dog for purification. They dipped the stripped goat’s hide into the sacrificial blood and then went along slapping both women and crop fields with the goat hide. Apparently Roman women enjoyed this ritual and believed that being touched by the hide made them more fertile in the coming year. Sounds rather kinky to me. Valentine’s Day became associated with love and romance in the 14th century when someone decided to celebrate it on February 14, the beginning of birds’ mating season. Somehow the flogging of women was less favoured in England and so they gave cards instead. In the 1840s, Esther A Howland (you go girl) changed the tradition of giving handmade cards by selling the first mass-produced Valentine’s cards in America. Today, according to the Greeting Card 50

Association, an estimated 1 billion Valentine’s Day cards are sent each year. No one knows who St Valentine really was. The Catholic Church recognised at least three different saints named Valentine or Valentinus. None were associated with love and all were apparently martyred on February 14. So what does the history demonstrate? As interesting as it is, knowing the history is absolutely irrelevant (although it could be useful in a trivia game). Like most holidays, the Valentine’s Day spirit of love has been tainted by commercialism. But that doesn’t mean it needs to taint your beautiful ideal of love. In a society that measures love and acceptance by the amount of money spent, it’s important to maintain the optimistic streak of the spirit of love that Valentine’s Day stands for. Love is the one thing we have an unlimited supply of and it’s free. I believe we ought to remember what’s important to us and pause from our busy lives to simply celebrate our love for one another (whether you spend anything or not) and that’s as great a reason as any to celebrate. And if all else fails, rip up an old T-shirt, dip it in some red wine and slap yourself (gently now) with it. Happy Valentine’s Day.

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