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Appendix A: Informed Consent Form
group setting that I was operating as a researcher, a facilitator, and as a man who could
identify with many elements of the other men’s story. There were many times during the
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interviewing process when I felt extremely honored to be welcomed into these narratives.
I still hear Sid saying that he not only feels like a fish out of water but sometimes he
wonders if he is fish at all. And the idea that his friends might be afraid of their own shadow
but he was sometimes afraid that if he looked you would see that he didn't have a shadow.
The profound struggle with his identity that Sid expressed and the anger the other men held
for him still moves me to tears because of the power and love in that moment. I remember
listening to Sid read his narrative and listening to the men responding thinking, "I'm watching
the process of repair unfold in this moment." That is what our group was like. The emotional
expression in the reading and the supportive, powerful, nonjudgmental response of the other
men facilitated a shared experience of truth about our-selves as men. I saw that these men
have the capacity to be
competitive, aggressive, and even violent; but they also have the capacity to be emotional,
supportive, and nonjudgmental. We embodied Cory's description himself, “I have become a
man who is a warrior and a hunter who wants love hanging in his meat house.” I'm still
moved by the participant’s courage and resiliency. I think Dean would say that we collectively
grew our emotional balls that day.
As a therapist I believe that these men have taught me invaluable lessons about the
process of recovery for men who been injured in their relationship with their fathers. First, it
seems to me that the time has to be right for men to enter into therapy. Each man described
some key circumstances that facilitated their entry into the therapeutic process. Further, as a
therapist, I've always been convinced that the therapeutic relationship and the person of the
therapist are the keys to building a successful alliance. My involvement in this study has
reinforced that. I think these men would agree with me, though when I say that demonstrating
competency, humility, and teamwork are also particularly important for therapists who want
to work with men. I think those therapists who are equally confident in themselves and
confident in the men they are working with, plus have the competencies to construct the kind
of relationships that can facilitate the recovery process, will have the most success working
with men. I also see in these narratives a process of recovery. Some men seemed very aware
that they were not as far along in the process as some of the other men. Others seemed aware
that they were further along in the process. Only one man felt that he had completed the
process of recovery, but even he said that he needed to do further work on his relationship
with his own sons and to grow in his ability to nurture and develop them along their own path.
Throughout my experience as a therapist, I have continued to develop a specialization
in the treatment of trauma and have presented workshops, symposiums, papers at
conferences, and
enrolled in advanced treatment training opportunities. This study has helped me realize the
limitations and the need for specialized training and experience for therapists who want to
work with men who have experienced masculine gender role trauma. Most discussions about
developmental trauma address the shattered identity and fractured sense of self that results
but few identified the shattered sense of the masculine self. The way participants described
their transformed sense of themselves as men is a valuable contribution to understanding
more about men’s recovery process.