Appendix A: Informed Consent Form

group setting that I was operating as a researcher, a facilitator, and as a man who could

identify with many elements of the other men’s story. There were many times during the

interviewing process when I felt extremely honored to be welcomed into these narratives.

I still hear Sid saying that he not only feels like a fish out of water but sometimes he

wonders if he is fish at all. And the idea that his friends might be afraid of their own shadow

but he was sometimes afraid that if he looked you would see that he didn't have a shadow.

The profound struggle with his identity that Sid expressed and the anger the other men held

for him still moves me to tears because of the power and love in that moment. I remember

listening to Sid read his narrative and listening to the men responding thinking, "I'm watching

the process of repair unfold in this moment." That is what our group was like. The emotional

expression in the reading and the supportive, powerful, nonjudgmental response of the other

men facilitated a shared experience of truth about our-selves as men. I saw that these men

have the capacity to be

competitive, aggressive, and even violent; but they also have the capacity to be emotional,

supportive, and nonjudgmental. We embodied Cory's description himself, “I have become a

man who is a warrior and a hunter who wants love hanging in his meat house.” I'm still

moved by the participant’s courage and resiliency. I think Dean would say that we collectively

grew our emotional balls that day.

As a therapist I believe that these men have taught me invaluable lessons about the

process of recovery for men who been injured in their relationship with their fathers. First, it

seems to me that the time has to be right for men to enter into therapy. Each man described

some key circumstances that facilitated their entry into the therapeutic process. Further, as a

therapist, I've always been convinced that the therapeutic relationship and the person of the

therapist are the keys to building a successful alliance. My involvement in this study has

reinforced that. I think these men would agree with me, though when I say that demonstrating

competency, humility, and teamwork are also particularly important for therapists who want

to work with men. I think those therapists who are equally confident in themselves and

confident in the men they are working with, plus have the competencies to construct the kind

of relationships that can facilitate the recovery process, will have the most success working

with men. I also see in these narratives a process of recovery. Some men seemed very aware

that they were not as far along in the process as some of the other men. Others seemed aware

that they were further along in the process. Only one man felt that he had completed the

process of recovery, but even he said that he needed to do further work on his relationship

with his own sons and to grow in his ability to nurture and develop them along their own path.

Throughout my experience as a therapist, I have continued to develop a specialization

in the treatment of trauma and have presented workshops, symposiums, papers at

conferences, and

enrolled in advanced treatment training opportunities. This study has helped me realize the

limitations and the need for specialized training and experience for therapists who want to

work with men who have experienced masculine gender role trauma. Most discussions about

developmental trauma address the shattered identity and fractured sense of self that results

but few identified the shattered sense of the masculine self. The way participants described

their transformed sense of themselves as men is a valuable contribution to understanding

more about men’s recovery process.