20 years national sos line for victims of domestic violence

20 YEARS NATIONAL SOS LINE FOR VICTIMS OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

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CONTENTS

page 1.

On the Anniversary 3 2.

Establishment, Development and

Recognition 7 3.

Vision and Mission 12 4.

Definition of domestic violence 13 5.

Working principle 15 6.

Intervention Center “Women’s Transit House” 16 7.

Approach And Advantages 17 8.

Analysis of the work 18 9.

Testimony 23 10.

Projects & Campaigns 32 11.

Joint activities 34 Collaborators & Supporters 36 12.

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From the album of SOS line (02) 15 700 38 Publisher: Organization of women of the city of Skopje (OWS) National SOS line for victims of domestic violence (02) 15 700 Authors: Tomka Dilevska Snezhana Smilevska Divna Zmejkovska Boris Najdovski Graphic design: Vladimir Hadzi Pulevski Printing: Arcuss Design Edition: 500 copies 2

ON THE ANNIVERSARY In the last two decades, the nongovernmental sector was persistently fighting with the problem of domestic violence and succeeded to become a kind of mediator among the victims of domestic violence, the gender based violence and the institutions of the system.

The issue of domestic violence against women in the Republic of Macedonia was initially raised by the women’s non-governmental organizations.

Along with raising the issues of gender equality, women’s NGO’s also attained important role in shaping the legal framework and performance of institutions in the domain of prevention and suppression of violence against women. Furthermore, the non-governmental sector has imposed the need for greater sensibility of the state institutions for systematic prevention and elimination of domestic violence and assistance to victims.

One of the first non-governmental organizations at the early 90-ties that focused on the issue of domestic violence and opened the first SOS help line in Macedonia was the Organization of Women of the city of Skopje.

As such, OWS becomes a visionary and a leading Organization of the women’s movements and women’s activism in all spheres of life in the society, and first that perceived the necessity of opening the first SOS line for women and children victims of violence.

Hence, in August the 2nd 1994, as a joint project of OWS and the Dutch Interchurch Aid (DIA), the first SOS help line for women and children was established in Macedonia and successfully functions all these years as National SOS line for victims of domestic violence with the recognisable number (02) 15 700.

The main reason for establishing the SOS help line was the indisputable fact that the issue of violence against women and children for long was not perceived as a common problem of the society but treated as a private, intimate and family issue.

The relevant institutions were not committed responsible or concerned to interfere with the issue of domestic violence, while at same time numerous dramatic scenes were happening behind the closed doors of their homes, hidden from the eyes of public.

The perseverance and the dedicated work of the SOS line operators resulted in

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high public awareness for women to get free from fear and shame and gain confidence to speak openly about the problem of domestic violence hence encouraging them not to hesitate to call on the SOS help lines. By presenting many reports on the current situation regarding the percentage of violence in the first years of our work, made the problem of domestic violence even more visible, so the institutions of the system started to pay serious approach towards this problem.

In the last decade, the state through adopting new laws from the field of criminal law and family protection, took the side of the activists in the fight to combat domestic violence.

In the course of the 20 year’s work of the SOS line more than hundreds of volunteers have given legal and psychological help to women and children that were in a critical and violent situation.

Currently, the SOS line (02) 15 700 functions with twelve operators, always ready to listen and advise women of Macedonia in finding a proper solution in their homes, achievements of their deserved rights, a living space and economic stability.

The SOS line operates with a team of skilled operators-volunteers, whose main objective is to recognise and make visible every kind of violence against women and children and find the way to oppose it. Their enthusiasm, love and dedication as well as the sincere wish to give help when mostly needed, makes the group even more compact. They have gone through many trainings and education for work with the domestic violence issues. With the gained experience and self-control, free from traditions and prejudices, they overtake the entire responsibility while talking to the victim.

The SOS volunteers are successful women, from different professions and age.

They are academics, social workers, psychologists, professors, jurists, lawyers, journalists and external co-operators (ESE – association for emancipation, solidarity and equality) that give free legal aid.

The long standing experience and the recognition of this problem is not a satisfying element for many women, so they still stay silent and do not speak loud about the problem of violence. In spite that they are exposed and undergo through difficult situations, they still continue to accept the violent behaviour of the violator, leading even to their vigorous health. The violators are not only alcoholic abusers and mental patients, but also normal academic citizens and successful businessmen. On the SOS line, many recognized and educated women have called, seeking help in solving their problem.

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The turbulent social problems, the negative economic on-going events and the stress from poverty that our society is facing in the last twenty years, lead to a higher increase of the percentage of domestic violence, particularly children. They are often exposed to family violence and are the biggest trauma for children. No matter whether they are abused or neglected, in both cases they are victimised!

Therefore we shouldn’t be surprised and neglect the fact about the high percentage of alcoholism, drug addict and other types of violent behaviour of children even in the primary schools. Very often many children following the violent behaviour and model of their parents, in their later life they become potential violators, accepting it as a normal manner of communication in their mutual relations. In this way the chain of violence continues.

The family should never be a hot spot for violence!

The conducted researches on the issue of violence against women and children gives a dark picture in respect to human rights from a gender perspective. Accordingly, every second woman suffers psychological violence, whereas every third physical.

This leads to the indisputable fact, that this and all other SOS help lines will have a lot to do!

Hence, the functioning of the SOS line (02) 15 700 and other SOS lines will continue playing crucial role in the society for the prevention of domestic violence, respect of human rights as women’s rights and gender equality.

Congratulation on the 20th anniversary of the National SOS line for victims of domestic violence (02) 15 700!

With respect, Snezana Smilevska

__________________ Coordinator of the SOS line (02) 15 700

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ESTABLISHMENT, DEVELOPMENT AND RECOGNITION ESTABLISHMENT The beginning of the last decade of the XX century was with a turbulent character for the Macedonian state and citizens. It was the time of establishing political parties, new leaders and insubstantial stability. People lived with mixed feelings of hope, discomfort and vulnerability. Although there were many priorities in the society, women couldn’t find themselves inside, neither as individuals nor as family and social factor.

This was the reason why a group of women in 1991 came to an idea and took the first steps for establishing the first NGO in Macedonia. They also first to perceived the necessity of opening an SOS help line and shelter for women and children victims of violence.

At the annual assembly held in March 1994, an initiative was born and accepted for opening the first SOS help line in Macedonia. Therefore, on the 2nd of August 1994, the SOS line for women and children victims of violence started to function, in the beginning with the number 114-044. In a very short time, for easier recognition of the number, it was decided to use a shorter calling number (02) 9700.

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The beginnings were difficult! The volunteers were available every day for the women to call on the line, but during the first three months from the establishment of the SOS no calls arrived! Fortunately, in mid-October there it was, the first call “arrived” from a victim of domestic violence, asking help. Hence, until the end of this year, there was a serious breakthrough of the SOS line towards the publicity so 94 calls were registered by the end of 1994.

These results, the confidence and trust of the victims expressed towards the volunteers of the SOS line was added value and additional motivation to persist in the struggle for the prevention of domestic violence.

Therefore the management of OWS and the SOS volunteers brought various decisions such as: securing adequate training for the operators, capacity building and extension of the cooperation on local and regional level as well as gaining higher credibility of women and children victims of domestic violence.

DEVELOPMENT The problem of violence against women and children has been fully perceived by the SOS line operators and OWS volunteers at the very beginning of its function.

Due to this situation, it was decided to overtake numerous activities for a higher public awareness on the issue of domestic violence on one side and changes and advancement of the legal acts on the other. Hence, the SOS help line 9700 and the Organization of Women of the city of Skopje deserved the right to be widely recognized as one of initiators for the social changes in our society in the domain of prevention and suppression of violence against women and the advancement of the women’s rights.

These regulations led to the high recognition of the mission of the SOS line from all citizens of Macedonia, involving higher number of activists for the achievement of the envisaged objectives and goals as well as development of close cooperation with the institutions, the local and central authorities. At that time many workshops, tribunes, trainings and campaigns were conducted with the citizens of Macedonia. Along with this and through the active participation in various committees, commissions and coordinative bodies on local and central level, led to changes in the society and higher achievement of women’s rights.

Time was passing by slowly without even noticing it. Critical and nervous situation were present for sure, but slowly, the positive achievements that were evident day by day and the successful operation of the SOS line, increased the enthusiasm of the operators and motivated them even more to continue their work.

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The established cooperation with the institutions and similar NGO’s in the country and abroad, at the beginning of the new millennium, recognized new danger for the freedom of the women’s rights – the problem of trafficking of people. OWS and the SOS line 15 700, as part of the domestic and foreign networks participated in the struggle against trafficking of people.Additionally, the regular campaigns and the conducted activities dating from this period resulted in higher public awareness for this negative phenomenon in the society that led in overtaking necessary secure and safety measures.

In the year of 2004, in partnership with the Ministry of Labour and Social Policy (MLSP), the SOS line for women and children victims of violence (02) 9700 was transformed into first National SOS line for victims of domestic violence with the new number (02) 15 700.

In 2010, OWS, the SOS line (02)15 700 and twenty similar NGO’s from Macedonia, supported the initiative of establishing the first National network to end domestic violence against women and domestic violence. All these years since its establishment until now, work is constantly conducted through realization of many educational trainings, workshops and round tables for the prevention of the issue of domestic violence.

Due to the passionate work of the SOS operators, many taboos and forbidden topics collapsed, starting from the traditional stereotypes for the subordinate role of women in the family, property heritage, up to discrimination of women on the labour market and the participation of women in the decision making bodies. Today

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OWS and the SOS line 15 700 are the watchdog of the women’s human rights and freedoms but also a messenger for gender equality as a fundamental principle for economic strengthening and development of the society.

RECOGNITION The SOS line (02)15 700 is a recognized and respectable symbol in the fight of violence against women, equally accepted by the institutions, similar NGO’s, collaborators and wider. This in fact is due to the 20 years of persistent, transparent and dedicated work and the provision of secure and appropriate help for the victims of violence, but also as a feed back from the numerous conducted activities and events of public character.

The transparent and in time information and the close approach to the citizens have mostly contributed for a better recognition of the SOS line’s work. It is worth mentioning that during the passed twenty years many activities and manifestations have been conducted and realized: 220 educational trainings, 140 tribunes, 98 workshops, 20 trainings, 53 participations in TV programmes, 48 articles in the daily newspapers, many press conferences, and numerous events on open, campaigns and humanitarian activities.

The SOS line operators, persistently provide data, reports and relevant information to the institutions, (Ministry of Labor and Social Policy, Center for Social Care, Ministry of Interior) and to the similar NGO’s in the country and abroad.

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VISION and MISSION The vision of the National SOS line for victims of domestic violence (02) 15 700 is effective managing with the problem of domestic violence, respect of women’s rights as human rights and gender equality in the society.

Its mission is to provide security and support for the victims, provision of individual and institutional solutions on the issue of violence against women, widespread of women’s networks to end violence against women as well as advancement of gender equality and greater sensibility of the young people.

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DEFINITION OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE Violence in the family or domestic violence represents disorder of the physical, psychological or emotional health of one of the spouses or the occasional partners that are in relationship. Sometimes, the term “private violence” is used for domestic violence. This term defines violence that occurs in legal or illegal relationships among ex-spouses.

Violence among partners can occur in different forms: Emotional and verbal abuse, withholding money, stopping a partner from getting financial means, prevention of performing everyday activities, isolation or keeping a partner from contacting the family and friends, intimidation for murder, forced sexual abuse, sexual assault, threat, physical harm, physical attacks and attacks against property. In extreme cases domestic violence may end with death of the partner.

It is not rare that the term of “domestic violence” is identified with the term “violence among spouses”. As many other women’s activists that work to end domestic violence and violence against women, would like to signalize the inadequate meaning of this term!

Causes of domestic violence – The most frequent cause of domestic violence is the age, low salaries, life in violent family with frequent quarrels, consumption of alcohol or drugs, unemployment, sexual frustration and lack of satisfaction at work. The social and cultural factors also create social climate where violence against women is envisaged as everyday half acknowledged occurrence.

Consequences of domestic violence - The victims of domestic violence suffer direct or in direct consequences. The victim may have consequences on bodily heath, the range of which varies from relatively light contusions, cuts and bruises, up to fractures, sexually tran­sferable diseases, interim or permanent disability or death. The indirect consequences are manifested as declined self-confidence, anxiety, depression, up to phobia, post-traumatic stress disorder and suicidal thoughts.

Domestic violence also affects children who are directly or indirectly exposed to aggressive behaviour. It is very probable these children to adopt the pattern of violence, including performance or abiding a family violence as accepted value.

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Assistance and prevention - The most efficient way of helping victims of domestic violence is the accommodation in our intervention center called “Women’s Transit House” that functions in the frame of OWS. It is a safe and secure place where different programs for help are conducted. The victims accommodated in the WTH receive psychological and legal aid, counseling service for their children, medical protection and assistance in achieving contacts with the relevant institutions (Center for Social Care, Ministry of Interior, Ministry of Labor and Social Policy).

CIRCLE OF VIOLENCE

The violence is not permanent and is not happening accidentally! The understanding of this circle is very important in order to learn how to stop or prevent violent incidents. Although this circle is typical for the cases of domestic violence, it may not be always present in all of the various types of domestic violence.

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WORKING PRINCIPLES

The operators of the SOS line (02) 15 700 carefully listen and trust the victims of domestic violence, understand their life stories giving them a chance to speak openly about the violence they suffer, being always on their side.

The SOS operators support, encourage, inspire and animate the victims to bring back their self-confidence and autonomy in order to make their own reasonable decisions and settlement of the issue of domestic violence. All cases and the work is carefully noted in data base and strongly kept in secrecy.

The program for the work with the victims that call on the line is adjusted for the entire population based on the following principles: Anonymity, Discretion, Confidence, Respect, No prejudices and Nondiscrimination of any kind Anonymity

Discretion guaranteed

Protection of integrity

there is no need for the victim to give her identity. Anonymity is guaranteed!

discretion is the bases for building confidence. At the moment when the victim calls, there are various emotional reactions that influence her self-confidence and trust, minimizing the possibilities to get away from the problem which makes the building of mutual confidence even more complicated.

increases the awareness of the calling persons for their socialization in the society and the struggle for legalization of their rights for life without violence. The operators of the SOS line (02) 15 700 stimulate the victims to get out from the isolation, to understand that they are not alone, and most of all that it is not their fault that they suffer (undergo) violence. Support is one of the main goals!

The presence of the permanent increase of the percentage of violence evidenced

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by the SOS line operators show the crucial role of having such SOS lines and the advantage for their existence compared with the other forms of women’s groups.

Furthermore, there are patriarchal elements, tradition, culture as well as the stereotypes that indicate the fact that women should accept the issue of violence and shouldn’t speak loud about it since they will not be appreciated, and even neglected from the close relatives and the society.

INTERVENTION CENTER “WOMEN’S TRANSIT HOUSE” The intervention center “Women’s transit house” functions since 1995 in the frame of OWS and the SOS line (02) 15 700. In this center the victims of domestic violence and their children are accommodated for period of 24-48 hours. The capacity of the intervention center is 6 persons. Recently, with a financial support from the German Embassy in Skopje and Rotary Club Skopje Centar, the whole center was completely renovated in order to ensure suitable accommodation conditions for the victim.

The stay in the intervention center is guaranteeing safety to the victims. Discussions are made regularly towards raising victim’s self-confidence in order to overcome the feelings of fear, guilt and shame, helplessness and danger. When needed, services such as psychosocial help, medical care and institutional escort are provided.

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APPROACH AND ADVANTAGES The main approach of the work of the SOS line (02) 15 700 is the participation and contribution in the efforts to eliminate the issue of domestic violence in the society.

Currently, in numerous countries in the world, networks of solidarity are established that are linked through the work of many SOS lines and other similar initiatives against male’s violence towards women.

Their experience shows the following figures: • The highest percentage of violence happens in the families 85%; • 72% of women suffer violence many years; • 52% of women suffer violence every day.

The feminist answer to this kind of social destruction is making violence against women visible, naming it with its proper name which in fact is the main objective of all SOS lines in the world that are dedicated to this troublesome issue all over the world.

Calls by regions for the period 1994 - 2014

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ANALYSIS OF THE WORK Review of callings by years Year

No. of callings

1994 1995 1996 1997 1998 1999 2000 2001 2002 2003 2004

Total for period 1994 - 2004

Total for period 1994-2014

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94 132 129 148 175 217 249 291 323 388 424

3.045

Period

2005 – 2014 (Availability 24/7)

1994 – 2004

(Availability 17 h. to 22 h.)

Period

Year

2005 2006 2007 2007 2007 2008 2009 2010 2011 2012 2013 2014 (до 31.07)

Total for period 2005 - 2014

12.619

No. of callings

610 725 879 879 879 958 1023 1160 1145 1183 1215 676 9.574

Classification by type of violence Type of violence Physical Psychological Economical Sexual Incest Verbal Expelled from home Neighbor tensions Life in danger Total

No. of callings 4.973 4.641 1.601 56 1 1.103 78 42 224 12.703

Classification by reasons for violence Reason

No. of callings

Alcohol Jealousy Drugs Economic dependence Abuse of power Poor health Disrupted family relations Gambling Not specified Total

2.831 765 314 1.869 277 182 5.783 145 473 12.639

Physical

Psychological

Alcohol

Jealousy

Economical

Sexual

Drugs

Economical dependence

Verbal

Expelled from home

Abuse of power

Poor health

Neighbor tensions

Life in danger

Disrupted family relations

Gambining

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Classification by perpetrator’s relation with the victim The perpetrator is:

No. of callings

Husband Spouse Illegitimate partner Parents Children Ex husband Relative (broad family) Other

6.312 98 210 76 571 106

Total

7.635

Classification by toleration of the violence Violence is tolerate: Less than 1 year Between 1 and 2 years Between 2 and 5 years More than 5 years More than 10 years Total

No. of callings 615 1.206 2.713 1.386 887 6.807

157 105

Husband

Spourse

Less than 1 year

Between 1 and 2 years

Illegimitimate partner

Parents

Between 2 and 5 years

More than 5 years

Children

Ex husband

More than 10 years

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Classification by nationality of the caller Nationality

No. of callings

Macedonian Albanian Roma Bosnian Serbian Not specified Total

5.113 774 1.109 202 143 650 6.991

Classification by the notifier of violence Notifier is:

No. of callings

The victim (personal) Parent Children Other Total

3.218 1.003 562 2.109 6.892

Macedonian

Albanian

The victim (personal)

Parent

Roma

Bosnian

Children

Other

Serbiam

Not specified

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ClassiďŹ cation by the number of children witnesses of violence No. of children in family

No. of callings 595 2.114 902

One Two Three or more Total

3.611

ClassiďŹ cation by institution referral Institution Center for social care Police station Health care Ombudsman Total

One Three or more

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Two

No. of callings 2.113 1.691 326 337 4.467

Center for Social Care

Police station

Health care

Ombudsman

TESTIMONY

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­ ven though she wasn’t prepared, E Ana thought that she is ready for marriage at 20.She got married, and the problems have already occurred immediately after the wedding ceremony. Ana realized that her marriage wasn’t a bed of roses.

The inharmonious relationship, the lack of self-confidence in the marriage, her husband’s alcoholism and se­ ries of other problems were the main reason for Ana to think about divorce.

She carefully thought about everything and then responsibly decided what she wanted to do…

She learned to be patient – that everything is in its time and helped by the experience, she built a personal attitude to many questions:

To cope more easily with unfamiliar situations, to look for support within herself, to accept the failures more easily, to turn towards the pre­­ sent and new challenges…..she do­esn’t idealize anything anymore, When she called us the first time she she says”. was scared, furious, desperate….all that confusion of unwanted oppo­sed The beautiful small things that me­ to Ana’s pink expectations enabled an something in life are enough for her to have an insight important for me, only if you know how to enjoy her personal safety meaning that th­em”. this time she must not be shallow Now she has addressed us as good and rash. old friends as if to a good, fertile soil She divorced and returned to her where she plants her sincerity with parents carrying the burden of her pleasure….ore beautiful so that in own mistakes, bad judgment, shame, this important and holly self-underprejudices, inability to cope with the standing she can grow for another situation and fear of being mocked. step forward, the better, more beauIn order to overcome all that and tiful and more valuable…she chose to make her life better she started us to be her friends and to guide her nourishing a small but important on the way of her maturity and safespa­ce for her personal maturity full ty. of energy Where she could listen and lo­ok at herself and the circumstan­ The last time Ana called us because of her insomnia that had ces she was in. been tortur­ed her for a long time…

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she told us that she got back to the surpassed problems in her past…she felt bad, stupid, and she didn’t know what that actually meant to her…I asked her what she had been doing these days? And she started to retell the adventures with her old friends.

It was obvious, that these two things don’t match. I used to ask myself how the nightmare and the insomnia can be connected.

Thorn apart by her life story starting from high school until she got married and divorced, Ana gained a life experience greater than her peers that made a paradoxical turn in her mind that created a feeling of being different and not belonging to anyone. It is also true that immediately after her divorce, her old friends accepted her much more openly and relaxed than she was ready to accept.

The success showed that Ana was already a woman. After a year of divorce, she drinks her coffee with her friends, she goes for a walk, or she spends her time in a coffee bar. She is invited in many parties but she never goes.

was listening to her, and I was looking for a good moment to solve her problem…

Ana’s eyes are wide open and the only thing that she must do is to solve the problem. I asked her if she was able to overcome her insomnia in the last 5-6 days…I got only long and nice pause full of beliefs that Ana will leave the space of bans and prejudice…She said that she could go on a birthday party. She was told that the party was great but she still was discouraged to go.

She regrets….but today is Wednesday and the next party is on Saturday…we were laughing and enjoying while she was talking about her outfits…she is completely ready for going out……and she will surprise and make all her friends happy… and you see even with me on the SOS line, she expressed happiness.

Of course it is not easy to take off the veil of loneliness of prejudices the one who never suffered nor was frightened never got rid of them.

She still lives in fear and shame that she is a disgrace for her friends and family even though she is only 20.I

20 YEARS NATIONAL SOS LINE FOR VICTIMS OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

OLE

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I have a friend who has been living in beating, fear and then reconciliation or passionate love in so many years. She used to sleep over in my house for several times, but she ne­ ver called the police to report the problems that she had with her husband, of course the neighbors in this area didn’t consider the fact that she might be killed …she always believed deeply in herself that tomorrow is another day, I annoyed him, I shouldn’t have done that… she blamed herself…my begging and my wishes to help her were totally worthless…I couldn’t talk to him because if he had found out that I was told something, she would have paid with her life I am sure…bustard, manipulator he was a great actor in front of everyone so no one believed her that she lived in a great suffer…the most difficult thing was that after every beating she got some

That winter was one of the coldest winters in the last years! It was snowing hard and seemed as it will never stop. With warm clothing scarf and hat on my head I was on my way for my duty on the SOS line. I started drinking my morning tea when the phone started ringing. The woman on the other side of the line was screaming and crying, desperately as­ king help. She was talking in a dialect that I could hardly understand but I had the feeling that something terrible was happening. I first asked her to calm down and to slowly explain what was really happening. I told her that I

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nice and expensive presents, he was always caring and gentle so no one could believe the opposite…I don’t want to excuse myself but I really couldn’t help destroying that chaos, she wouldn’t listen to me…until she lost the baby she was expecting, she was 6 months pregnant…she was taken to the hospital fighting for her life….everything stopped at that moment…why have you been waiting for so long? I can’t get the answer even today, we seldom see each other (she lives far from here) but we talk on the telephone. I sometimes want to ask her something but I don’t want to take her back to the past…everything is ok now, she star­ted a new life, she lives in other town, she is happy, her ex-husband is in jail and he will spend the rest of his life there….

DIVNA

have to interrupt her in order to call the police from her town. I started shaking and I spontaneously started to dial the police station number of her city.

I was lucky enough to hear the voice of the policeman in charge, so I explained who I am and why I am calling. I felt that he had the same feeling of fear, but he promised that he will take the necessary steps. It was already getting dark outside, and as time was passing by I felt the strong beating of my heart. There was nothing I can do except to wait.

The woman that called was actually the grandmother who reported that her granddaughter (9 years old) disappeared. She was her daughter’s child.

The mother of the child was working abroad whereas her husband and her daughter stayed in the in town. The grand mother lived in the village, in a long away from the town. . The son in law was an alcoholic abuser, doing nothing, except that he took care of the two dogs, closed in the one of the rooms of their flat. Food for the dogs could only be brought from the child, because she had no fear from dogs.

Hence these two dogs were in fact wolves that her father kept for intimidation when receiving some fists or when no money was given to him to buy alcohol.

The girl was attending school and could not live with her grandmother in the village Her father didn’t work and was depending on the money that his wife was sending every month.

That day, as every day the little girl entered the room bringing food for the “dogs”, but the starving wolves were coming closer to her unsatisfied with the small quantity of food that was brought. The girl, frightened, closed the door and ran away. Her father as usual, was not at home, so she started running not knowing where to go!

The school teacher, seeing that the girl is missing, started calling her home to see why the girl didn’t come to school. Since there was no answer, she called the girl’s grandmother, but found out that the little girl was not

there either. The grandmother started calling their relative and friends, but she was told that the door of the girl’s house was open ad there was nobody in the house. So the grandmother immediately called our SOS number.

I called the police station once again, but there was no answer. However I took a deep breath since knew that all policemen were looking for the gi­ rl. The grandmother called later, informing that all citizens of the village are looking for the girl. The last thing I heard was that the some of the citizens, in the afternoon saw the little girl climbing the mountain. I got even frightened, my fear escalating, since I was afraid that some wild animal may attack her or she could freeze (due to the very cold weather). But la­ te in the evening, around 10:30 pm, the officer of the police station called and informed me that the girl was found by the forester, under a tree, asleep and ice cold. She was urgently taken to the city hospital and after the received treatment she was taken to her grandmother. At the same time, the policeman who was on duty that day, found the drunk father and arrested him. The two wolves were al­ so taken from his house. After a week we contacted the police station so we learned that the girl was feeling well, but very quiet. Towards her fa­ther two claims have been reported: keeping wild animals home and exposing the girl’s life in danger, and the second, lack of childcare for his daughter.

LENA

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It was the first day of my duty on the SOS line. While I was going to the office I was thinking about all my obligations and a problem that I have solved is my driving force for starting the day.

dence back and to teach them that no violence should be tolerated. So­ me­times those conversations are a kind of support, sometimes they are interventions to the other institutions including the police.

When the phone rings, and when you pick up the headset, you will hear a desperate voice of a parent who is being tortured, humiliated or beaten by his child who became a drug addict or a woman who is crying because of her husband’s punches in front of her children or an incest which was made somewhere.

On the other hand you will hear Thank you from someone who is grateful for everything that you have done.

In that case you forget who you are and you only think how to help those people by showing them the light in the end of the tunnel. You should know how to bring their self-confi-

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Now I realize that the duty is not a worthless thing.

Then you go back home to your family, house and other activities and you are again you.

VIOLETA

I am going to tell you a true life story about a family that lightens up bravely the differences between the guilt and the innocence, loyalty and the jealousy that are the main factors for destroying a family.

She random met a friend of her from school days and she greeted him warmly so she enjoyed the conversation with him berceuse they haven’t seen each other for a very long time.

One night a husband and a wife left their children home in order to go on a wedding ceremony.

After her husband noticed this, he became so furious and ordered her to leave the wedding immediately.

There had been a real drama in the car. He started to insult her, beating and threatening her, without allowing explaining what really happened.

She couldn’t fall asleep thinking about any solution that will help her in the preventing the violent behavior of her husband.

She was begging him to stop with her eyes were full of tears. Furiously, he throws her out of the car. She didn’t know what to do at 2 a.m, where to go and where to seek for a help.

We can always find solution because where is power there is also justice!

After finishing high school B.A started to work on the phone sex and tarot line. When she was given an opportunity to work the same job abroad for a higher salary, she accepted without hesitation. But instead she was taken into an apartment without any documents where for four months she was forced to satisfy sexually an organized group of criminals.

When she called on the SOS line 15 700 I was excited from the conversation with her and after long persuasion, she finally decided to report the police. I was proud of her self-confidence and I strongly believe that she will forget this unpleasant experience. The group of criminals has been caught.

SHE MADE IT!

She was helpless and desperate. Th­ en some client showed up who felt sorry for her so she succeeded to es­ cape and returned back to Macedonia.

For long she couldn’t accept the fact that she was a victim of human trafficking and didn’t want to talk about it or to report he police of what she went through.

VERA

Today, B.A is married woman with 2 children. She lives in a harmonious marriage and runs her own company and takes care of her family. We became friends and from time to time we talk on a phone.

MARJONKA

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Maria got married at the age of 18 to a man in his late thirties. Shortly after the wedding ceremony he started beating her… That lasted nine years...... This is her story: I had to go and sleep in different places just to escape the beating when he was coming home. I was running away with my two daughters to escape all these tortures, sometimes I could succeed to prevent him beating me, but I still don’t really know how I survived. He raped me every time when I didn’t want to go to bed with him. When he was coming home drunk he was beating putting me to drug down. He was insulting me by saying “You stupid woman, look at yourself”. This even made me feel more stupid and disgraced, so I was even thinking, “Am I really stupid”? At the end I accepted this as a very personal thing since after all it happens to you, and at the end you really loose the feeling of yourself. I

I know that the world is colourful.

Besides sense, there is also madness. Besides altruism, there is also inhumanity, selfishness. Besides the good will and generosity, intolerance and evil occur regularly…

Cruel injustice and discrimination of different kind oppose the righteousness and equality. We live in much polarised reality, divided at least into two opposite and conflict forces.

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was destroyed both, physically and psychologically. On the other hand I was alone, with no friends, but still he was so jealous, so when walking with him on the streets he didn’t allow me to look at anyone at all. After some time I took the courage to report him to the police asking for help. He was taken to the police but when he came home, again he was furious and broke the door. I thought that things will get better, but on the contrary, things got even worse. I was desperate and didn’t know what to do with myself. I felt like being in prison with no way to escape! I was wondering what the best thing to do is, although after every beating, he regretted his behaviour saying “Please excuse me, this will never happen again”, but these were just empty words and declarations of a violent man…

However, violence went on...

TOMKA

I do not want to be a passive witness of the happenings from aside!

Therefore, my choice is to be in service of constructive and progressive forces that support the evolution of the humankind and the whole planet. The wish for such a service led me to become a volunteer at the SOS line (02) 15 700.

ZORE

After a while you realize the delicate difference among holding hands and chaining your soul; To also recognize that love doesn’t mean relying on somebody’s shoulder and have friends or have security; And you start to learn the kisses are not negotiations and that receiving presents are not promises, Then you start accepting your defeats while walking tall and eyes that look ahead towards the beauty of women,

And then from this moment you learn to draw your own path in your life since tomorrow is still uncertain for designing your plans whereas the future can never be predicted., And you soon realize that the sun will burn you if you expect too much!

Then instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers, plant your own garden and beautify your soul, And then the right time comes to realize that you can stand up proud with a feeling that you have your own value!

NENA

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PROJECTS & CAMPAIGNS “Successful women, successful stories”, project, supported by Alpha Bank “The right of choice in family planning”, project, supported by NGO HERA “Gaining practices for personal health care – sexual and reproductive health”, project, supported by Municipality of Karposh “Improvement of caring capacities of the intervention center Women’s transit house”, project, supported by the Embassy of Germany and Rotary Club Skopje Centar “Joined against the violence against women and domestic violence – 101 rose with love”, campaign, supported by Ramstore Mall, Publicis and National network to end violence against women and domestic violence “Strategic initiatives for life without violence”, project, supported by UNFPA “Strengthening of the national capacities in partnership with the local self-management”, project, supported by UNFPA “To make violence visible”, project, supported by UNFPA, Municipality of Karposh and Publicis “Didn’t you know? People are trade!”, project, supported by IOM and the Government of Finland “Resist! Don’t accept the violence”, project, supported by IOM and the Royal Kingdom of Norway “Share, support, solve”, project “Silence is not priceless! Report domestic violence!”, project, supported by the Ministry of Labor and Social Policy and ESE “Not just 16 but 365 days against violence!”, campaign in the occasion of the global campaign “16 days of activism against violence of women” “Global initiative for prevention of domestic violence”, campaign

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JOINT ACTIVITIES 1. Activities of allied NGO’s • “Initiative for implementation of the Istanbul convention against violence against women”, National network to end violence against women and domestic violence • “Free legal aid for victims of domestic violence”, ESE • “Protection of children from domestic violence”, First children’s embassy in the world Megjashi • “Women against poverty”, Macedonian Platform Against Poverty • “Improvement of the cooperation between the SOS lines as civil services”, Open Gate – La Strada • “Training of operators for work on new SOS line for victims of violence in Strumica”, HERA 2. Support of UN global campaign “16 days of activism against violence of women”

• “One billion rising”

• “V-Day”

• “Orange Day” 3. Activities of central establishment • “I have courage and power to say NO to violence. You can too!”, project of UNFPA and Ministry of Labor and Social Policy • “A real man never hits a woman”, campaign of Ministry of Labor and Social Policy in the occasion of the global campaign “16 days of activism against violence of women” • “One attack is attack over all”, campaign of UNFPA and Ministry of Labor and Social Policy in the occasion of the global campaign “16 days of activism against violence of women” • “Together to come out from the dark of violence”, campaign of the Ministry of Labor and Social Policy, UN and the Kingdom of Netherlands 4. Activities of local self-management • “Prevention and protection from domestic violence”, tribune in Municipality of Kisela Voda • “Education and network establishment of youth in struggle against violence in society and family”, tribunes in primary schools in Municipality of Gjorche Petrov

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• “Early recognition of the domestic violence”, tribunes in the small gardens, primary and secondary schools in Municipality of Karposh • “Recognition and prevention of human traffi cking”, tribunes in Municipalities of Saraj, Chucher Sandevo and Volkovo • “To return the tradition of Skopje’ KORZO”, campaign for promotion of cultural values supported by the City of Skopje

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COLLABORATORS Authorities • • • •

Government of RM MLSP CSC MOI

Other collaborators

Local self-management • • • • • • •

City of Skopje Municipality of К. Voda Municipality of Gj. Petrov Municipality of Karposh Municipality of Ch. Sandevo Municipality of Aerodrom Municipality of Saraj

• • • • •

NNEVAWDV (21 NGO) KARAT KVINNA-TILL-KVINNA MPAP La Strada

SUPPORTERS Supporters

Media supporters

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

• • • • • • • • • • •

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T-Mobile Alpha Bank АD Skopje Sparkasse Bank АD Skopje German Embassy in Skopje Rotary Club Skopje Centar Zonta Club of Skopje Netherlands Embassy in Skopje UN Women UNFPA International Office for Migration (IOM) Konrad Adenauer Stifftung (KAS) Winner Insurance Skopje ЕСЕ/ESE Publicis Tinex

Macedonian Radio Television ТV Sitel ТV МТМ TV Alpha ТV Telma ТV Каnаl 5 Наshа ТV Vecher Dnevnik Nova Makedonija Utrinski vesnik

From the album of SOS line (02) 15 700

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