Winter 2008 On the Minds of Moms

rad dad profile

ORIGIN CHIROPRACTIC

PHYSICIANS

Treating conditions of the spine and nervous system including those involving pregnancy, post pregnancy, fertility, children, and headaches.

280-2599

of the International Chiropractic Pediatric Association

on the minds of moms

www.onthemindsofmoms.com

PUBLISHER DS Communication, LLC

EDITOR Managing Editor Dani Parkos Fluge

COPY EDITOR Karina Hodny

MARKETING AND SALES Director

Sheri Kleinsasser Stockmoe

PHOTOGRAPHY Ria Czichotzki – Rialee Photography Scott Thuen – Thuen Design

DESIGN AND LAYOUT Scott Thuen – Thuen Design

AD DESIGN Lindsay Arneson

PRINTING Richtman’s Printing

EDITORAL CONTACT e-mail: info@onthemindsofmoms.com

ONTHEMINDSOFMOMS.COM MANAGING CO-EDITORS Dani Parkos Fluge and Sheri Kleinsasser Stockmoe DESIGN & LAYOUT Quirky Bird Designs, Inc.

INFORMATION mail: PO Box 190, Fargo, ND 58107

ADVERTISING OPPORTUNITIES phone: 701.306.1624

e-mail: advertise@onthemindsofmoms.com

SUBSCRIPTION e-mail: info@onthemindsofmoms.com

or visit: www.onthemindsofmoms.com

CONTRIBUTE CONTENT

If you have an interest in contributing to OTMOM, please contact us at info@onthemindsofmoms.com

COVER PHOTO BY Rialee Photography www.rialeephotography.com

OTMOM MISSION STATEMENT

On The Minds Of Moms is dedicated to providing a community of local support and real-life advice for the modern day mom who is on the go and needs to know. We are inspired to help the woman behind “the mom” balance it all by offering support, validation and reassurance she is a good mom wanting only the best for herself and family.

On The Minds Of Moms is a quarterly magazine written by, for and about local moms in the greater Fargo-Moorhead area. On The Minds Of Moms strives to achieve a balance between useful information and entertaining content. Written to serve as the local reading alternative to family magazines that are produced for a larger regional/national audience.

On The Minds Of Moms contains views from across the parenting spectrum. These views do not necessarily reflect those of the publisher. All activities listed in these pages are at your own risk and require appropriate supervision.

Copyright 2008 All Rights Reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without written permission from the publisher. On The Minds Of Moms is a trademark registered at the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office.

Member

the mom message

In Webster’s Dictionary, the fourth definition of Perspective reads:

4. a) a specific point of view in understanding things or events;

b) the ability to see things in a true relationship.

Starting OTMOM has allowed us to meet FM area men and woman who have shared their perspective on family, kids and various life events. So, by definition we have been blessed to learn how these wonderful people understand and see things to be true. Truly a gift.

Our featured mom this issue represents a new level of inspiration. Julie Kottsick showed us a perspective that isn’t the standard BS you expect to hear. Live everyday like it’s your last…there’s a clique you hear a lot, but does anyone REALLY do that? Can you live with reckless abandonment each day just in case tomorrow doesn’t come? And is that really that important? We don’t think so.

Julie made us recognize it’s the little things in life which mean the most. The small choices we make, seeing the importance of the people in our life and finding joy in each day is what REALLY matters. Simply putting ponytails in our daughters’ hair, snuggling in for a bed time read, calling up that friend you have gone weeks without talking to, and not wasting energy dwelling on the ‘what-ifs’ or ‘should haves’. These among others are the lessons Julie has taught us.

Thank you, Julie for sharing your story and for teaching us the true meaning of perspective.

Dani & Sheri

Get

“Biology is the least of what makes someone a mom ”

Dr. Susan Mathison and Dr. Lesley Soine, along with the Catalyst Medical Center team, care for patients by enhancing their outer beauty.

Cosmetic Services

• Facial Plastic & Reconstructive Surgery

• SmartLipo™

• Lipodissolve Alternatives

• Thermage®

• Alma Accent™ XL Laser

• Fractional Resurfacing

• BOTOX® Cosmetic

• Juvéderm™

• Restylane® & Perlane®

• Radiesse™

• Acne, Rosacea, Scarring, Sun Damage & Wrinkle Treatments

1800 21st Ave South Fargo, ND 58103 701.365.8700

catalystmedicalcenter.com

—Oprah

lisa gulland-nelson

This busy mom works at the NDSU Career Center and is pursuing her master’s degree in Communications. Lisa and husband Andy are proud parents to Emily who will turn one Christmas day. A former Fox News reporter, Lisa enjoys spending time with friends, weekends at the lake and sloppy kisses from Emily… and Andy!

dr. william c. porter writer

A native of Texas, Dr. Porter has treated patients’ ear, nose & throat conditions for 24 years. Dr. Porter and wife Lauren have three kids and recently acquired the title ‘empty nesters’. An active member in his church, he enjoys jogging, reading, tennis and watching the Dallas Cowboys.

Attending college later in life, Deb earned a master’s degree in social work. This mother of three and grandmother of six is employed at MeritCare’s Child Psychiatry Clinic where she provides therapeutic services to children and their families. Deb is certified as a Love & Logic Parenting instructor and enjoys spending time with family and friends, reading, gardening, fly fishing and creative arts.

Founder of Crossroads Consulting, Jodie has a true passion for helping others identify and discover their passion for life and desires in career. No stranger to searching for her own true path, Jodie has worked in radio advertising, as a career placement recruiter and most recently opened her own businesses. Jodie and husband Eli are proud parents to Foster (6) and Keaton (2).

Originator of Rialee Photography, this once child care professional, wife, and mom of four has been able to turn her hobby of artistic style, with her combined passion for children and photography, into a very successful career. Modern and fresh, Ria photographs with 100% natural light on location as well as in her new natural light loft studio in downtown Fargo.

A native of New Rockford, ND she sang her way through high school and then college with the NDSU concert choir. Heidi is a busy wife to husband TJ, mother to daughter Leighton (21 mo) and step-son Kaden (4). When she isn’t working full-time in the human resource field she shares her love for music as a licensed Kindermusik educator and owner.

writer | fargo

jodie harvala writer | fargo

| fargo

ria czichotzki photographer | moorhead

deb abbey writer | fargo

heidi sue koepplin writer | fargo

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show off your mom pride

With a shirt that says it all. Now available online at the OTMOM store.

791

the average amount of money each consumer is expected to spend this holiday season.

1914

the year the first bra was patented by American Mary PhelpsJacobs. The idea was later sold to Warners for $1,500.

750,000

the estimated number of entrepreneurs making all or part of their living on eBay….and many hail from smaller towns.

The most complete and accurate Yellow Pages!

Richtman’s ad

mod mom

coralee demers

age 39

banking vice president

married mom of 6 and 3 year old boys

the woman i most identify with would be…

My sister Andréa. She decided to stay home and raise her four boys while running a day care at the same time. She also took classes online to get her nursing degree! She was with her children at a critical time in their development but also never gave up her goal of becoming a nurse. Andréa and I also share the same family values and outlook on life.

my favorite “mom” place to shop…

Anywhere that has shoes and handbags.

the most self indulgent thing i won’t give up...

After my children go to bed at night I like to take time for myself and watch an hour or so of television. Watching a crime series or reality TV show helps me to wind down and forget about the dozen things I’ve got swirling around in my head.

the biggest fear i have…

Something happening that would affect the health or welfare of my children. My children and family are the center and balance of my life and losing that is a very scary thing to me. My husband and I keep the best interests of our children in the forefront of any decision within our control.

photography by | rialee photography

my day goes smoothly when…

Dalton and Jack wake up by themselves. Although, every day starts out great because the first thing both boys do in the morning is give me a big hug and say “good morning mom.”

the kid snack i am most likely to eat…

Anything sweet, especially Oreo cookies. Unfortunately, I think my children have inherited their mom’s sweet tooth.

my biggest pet peeve…

Adults who don’t take responsibility for their actions or follow through on a commitment. Children are taught at a young age that every action has a consequence and you should do what you say you’ll do. I was a young adult before learning these lessons and it’s difficult for me to see this continually happen through stories in the media.

one parenting trick i have learned from my husband...

“Let boys be boys.” Growing up, I was the oldest of four girls and a real “girly” girl who didn’t like to get her hands dirty. I’ve learned to stand back and let my boys wrestle in the living room, get dirty in the backyard and play baseball and hockey in the basement.

the accessory i can’t live without…

My CHI flat iron. My hair has gotten shorter and the style a little simpler with each child.

my definition of a mod mom is…

Any woman who has the desire and courage to raise a child. Being a mom is the most rewarding role a woman can ever fill. Nothing I read or heard could have prepared me for the unconditional love that comes from being a mom. I pray every day for the guidance to keep my children on the right path. Both Mark and I do our best to lead our children by example.

one mom tip i would like to share with other moms would be…

Trust your instincts and do what feels right. Parenting books are great resources but if rocking your child to sleep every night is something that is comforting to you both, do it. My husband and I rocked both of our boys to sleep every night and it was kind of sad when they got to the age where they wanted to lay in their crib and fall asleep on their own.

Nothing could have prepared me for the unconditional love that comes from being a mom.

rad dad

photography by | rialee photography

ryan fritz

age 36

web & online

marketing consultant

divorced/single dad to 7 year old daughter

my definition of a rad dad is…

A dad who is able to blend fun and discipline and makes sure his kids come first. I try to keep my daughter in mind with every decision I make in life. A Rad Dad will pass along all of his values to his children and have a good time doing it. And he reads lots of books.

what i have learned most from being a dad would be…

To become more selfless and to love. It’s not just about me anymore. My daughter has taught me the true meaning of pride. I’ve never been so proud of anything as I am of my little girl. Most of all my daughter has taught me how to be a man.

i am most proud of…

The accomplishments and moral compass my daughter has developed with or without my guidance. The person she has become and the principles she has developed in a short seven years honestly amazes me each and every day.

outside of being a dad i am most passionate about…

Developing my own business. I’ve recently started working independently as a web consultant, focusing on design, e-commerce and online marketing campaigns. Working for myself can be intimidating at times, but it’s a goal I set for myself years ago. I’m also very passionate about art, especially children’s artwork. It’s the kids that have all this wonderful, raw creativity. The art my daughter brings home from school inspired me so much that I decided to begin a project titled www.fargokids.com. A web site that promotes creativity in our youth and offers high quality children’s art reproductions and kids art archiving. I envision one day funding special creative art seminars and classes that would benefit the creativity in our local kids.

being a single dad my biggest fear in raising a daughter has to be…

The time I spend away from my daughter. I always fear she will forget her dad. I know it’s not true, but it scares me nonetheless. She has a great mom so I can rest assured. I also fear I will never fully understand how to dress a young girl.

my daughter has my…

Eyes, quick feet, and most importantly, an amplified sense of my creativity. She also has my sense of humor and she’s an adventurous eater like myself.

my best dad quality is…

Is just that, being a dad. Being a father is a blessing a title I hope I never take for granted. I’m also a decent cook for a dad. My goal is to pass along all the good I’ve learned in my lifetime and educate my daughter on the paths in life that may be a waste of time.

any advice i would have for other dads would be…

There is nothing more rewarding than trying to be a good dad. Make every second count, never take for granted the time you have with your children. Be there for them always, go to all their events and make pancakes on a regular basis.

other things you should know about me…

I like to challenge myself physically with activities like running and biking and some weight lifting. I love being in the outdoors hiking or camping. I also enjoy painting portraits, drawing and sketching and working on freelance illustration and web projects. I enjoy volunteering and I appreciate good design in any shape or form.

november events

6-9

Romeo & Juliet

701-237-0210

www.oakgrovelutheran.com

Oak Grove Lutheran School’s amateur production of Shakespeare’s Romeo & Juliet at the Scheels Center for the Performing Arts. Tickets: students $5, adults $10. 7:30pm start time (6-8th), 2:00pm (9th).

7 & 8

Used Book Sale

218-233-6117

www.moorheadcentermall.com

AAUW used book sale at the Moorhead Center Mall. Open 9am-9pm on the 7th and 9am-5:30pm on the 8th.

8 Fargo Library Preschool

Storytime

701-476-4040

www.fargolibrary.org

Storytime at the Dr. James Carlson Library starting at 10:30am.

8

YMCA Saturday Fun Night

Downtown Branch

701-293-9622

www.ymcacassclay.org

Kiddos ages K-8th grade enjoy a night of climbing, gym games, XerGames and more. 4:30pm-9:30pm with an evening meal and snack provided.

8

Art From Around the World

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Kids ages 4-8 will spend the morning pretending they’re in a country far away! Kids will learn about the art and culture of Mexico and take home a fun project. RDJ Rec Center from 10am11:30am. Fee: $10.40.

10

Heartsaver CPR Course

701-364-1704

www.fmambulance.com

The Heartsaver CPR course covers basic adult, child and infant CPR. Located at Merigen Medical, 3148 Fiechtner Dr. South in Fargo starting at 7pm. $30 fee. Register online.

12

Junior Artists

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Experience a variety of theme related projects as you and your child explore the world of art at the Robert D. Johnson Rec Center. Help your child learn to use paint, paintbrushes, glue, chalk, and

many other creative materials. Ages 3-5, adult supervision required. Dress for a mess! 1pm-2:30pm, $10.60 fee.

14

Junior League Jubilee

701-235-6615

www.fmjrleague.org

Enjoy an evening of appetizers, wine tasting, silent auction, live music and more. Support the women of Junior League of FM and their efforts in building better communities for woman and kids. 6pm-10pm at the Ramada Plaza Suites. Tickets are $30.

15

Babe Ruth Baseball

Registration Deadline

701-232-9225

www.fargobaberuth.org

Cal Ripken (ages 8-12) & Babe Ruth (ages 13-15 & 16-18) Baseball provides youth with supervised, competitive baseball games. Games are played throughout the tri-city beginning in mid-May.

15

Awesome Art Afternoon

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Come and spend an afternoon creating fun and exciting art projects at the Robert D. Johnson Rec Center. Children will be able to create a variety of art projects to take home. Adult supervision required. 1pm-3pm. FREE event.

15

YMCA Saturday Fun Night

Schlossman Branch

701-293-9622

www.ymcacassclay.org

Kiddos ages K-8th grade enjoy a night of climbing, gym games, XerGames and more. 4:30pm-9:30pm with an evening meal and snack provided.

15 & 16

Church Bazaar

218-233-6117

www.moorheadcentermall.com

Moorhead Center Mall’s Church Bazaar is open 10am-5:30pm on the 15th and Noon-5pm on the 16th.

16

Zoo Ventures Turkey Talk

701-277-9240

www.redriverzoo.org

There is more to turkey than Thanksgiving! Spend the afternoon at the Red River Zoo learning turkey facts, search for hidden turkeys, practice turkey calls, crafts and movies. Get your gobble on and head to the zoo from 1:30pm-3pm. $5 per person for members or $7.50 for non-member.

17

YMCA Fall Program Session

3 Begins

701-293-9622

www.ymcacassclay.org

Don’t miss your session 3 programs starting today. Call or go online for more information.

17

Heartsaver CPR Course

701-364-1704

www.fmambulance.com

The Heartsaver CPR course covers basic adult, child and infant CPR. Located at Merigen Medical, 3148 Fiechtner Dr. South in Fargo starting at 7pm. $30 fee. Register online.

17

Art From Around the World

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Your child will spend the morning pretending they’re in a country far away at the Robert D. Johnson Rec Center! Kids will learn about the art and culture of Mexico and take home a fun project. Ages 4-8, 10am-11:30am & $10.40 fee.

18

Baby Signs® Parent Workshop

701-234-5570

www.meritcare.com

The Parent Workshop is specially designed for expectant parents and parents of children from birth to 24 months of age. The workshop will teach you all you need to know to begin using Baby Signs® at home. 6:30pm-8pm with 15 seats available and a fee of $50. Register today.

18

Toast on the Town

www.fmtoastoftoawn.com

Call the gals and head out to toast the town. A wine and food extravaganza! Fargo Civic Center 5pm-8:30pm. $20 in advance, $25 at the door, Limited VIP Reserved Tasting.

20

Car Seat Safety Check

701-234-5570

Is your car seat installed correctly? Don’t chance it! Make an appointment to check it out at FM Ambulance. 1:30pm-5:30pm.

Rheault Farm

2902 25 Ave S, Fargo

22

Wonderland - Children’s Theatre

218-477-2271

www.mnstate.edu

Get lost in “Wonderland”. MSUM Theatre presents its fall children’s production. Two showings at 1pm and 4pm. Follows the story of three American school children who find themselves lost and in trouble. Call for tickets.

22 & 23

Pride of Dakota Holiday Showcase

www.prideofdakota.com

Find unique, North Dakota made gift ideas for the holidays. Fargo Civic Auditorium Saturday 10am-5pm and Sunday 11am-5pm. $2 Admission Kids 12 under FREE.

22 & 23

Antique & Collectible Show

218-233-6117

www.moorheadcentermall.com

Moorhead Center Mall’s Fall Antique & Collectible Show. Open 10am-5:30pm on the 22th & Noon-5pm on the 23th.

23

Festival of Trees

www.fraserltd.org

Fraser LTD 8th Annual Festival of Tree Celebration at Innovis Health. 3000 32nd Ave South Fargo begines. Trees on display through December 2nd.

24

Pediatric First Aid Course

701-364-1704

www.fmambulance.com

This course covers basic first aid of children. Located at Merigen Medical, 3148 Fiechtner Dr. South in Fargo starting at 7pm. $35 fee. Register online.

24

Car Seat Safety Check

701-234-5570

Is your car seat installed correctly?

Don’t chance it! Make an appointment to check it out at Luther Family Buick Pontiac GMC. 1:30pm-5:30pm.

25

Holiday Lights Parade

701-241-1570

www.fmdowntown.com

Kick off the holiday season with the Downtown Holiday Lights Parade 6:30pm.

27

Thanksgiving

Be thankful everyday, but I’m thankful turkey, potatoes, stuffing and pie isn’t everyday!

27-30

The Blenders Holiday Spectacular

701-235-4152

www.fargotheatre.org

The Blenders are back with their oneof-a-kind holiday spectacular! The five show engagement runs the 27th -30th with daily performances at 7:30pm and a 2pm matinee on the 30th. Call Fargo Theatre for availability.

28 & 29

Craft Show

218-233-6117

www.moorheadcentermall.com

Moorhead Center Mall’s Fall Craft Show. Open 10am-9pm on the 28th & 10am-9pm on the 29th.

29 & 30

Santa Village Opens

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com/ facility_rheault

Santa & Mrs. Claus make their way to Rheault Farm for the holiday season. Open 1pm-7pm & FREE admission with donation of canned goods, toys or cash donation.

29

Santa Photos at West Acres

701-282-2222

www.westacres.com

He’s back! Santa will be in town until Christmas Eve at West Acres for photos. Don’t miss this chance to get him your list!

december events

1 Star of Bethlehem

218-477-2904

Was it a comet, a supernova, or a miracle? The MSUM Planetarium presents its traditional holiday season show, at 2pm and 7pm Sundays and 7pm Mondays, Thursday and Saturday from Dec. 1-21. Admission $3, Kids 12 and under $1.50.

3

Bowls for Babies

701-235-5530

www.marchofdimes.

com/northdakota

March of Dimes Annual Fundraiser for the babies. Come select a uniquely artistic bowl, sample soup from several locally owned restaurants and keep the bowl as a souvenir. Ramada Plaza Suites from 10:30am to 1:30pm.

6

Breakfast with Santa

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Spend the morning with Santa and Mrs. Claus at Rheault Farms from 8am - 10am. Tickets include breakfast, craft and entertainment. Call for ticket purchase.

6

To All A Good Night

701-232-3301

www.innovishealth.com

Innovis Health brings a night of activity for the entire family. Come enjoy a winter wonderland of fun. Location 3000 32nd Ave South Fargo.

6 Holiday Fun

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Enjoy a morning of holiday fun. Build and decorate your own gingerbread house. RDJ Rec Center for ages 4-7 (+ adult) from 10am-12pm. Fee: $10.40

6

YMCA Saturday Fun Night

Schlossman Branch

701-293-9622

www.ymcacassclay.org

Kiddos ages K-8th grade enjoy a night of climbing, gym games, XerGames and more. 4:30pm-9:30pm with an evening meal and snack provided.

6

10–12

13

Youth Snowmobile Safety Course

701-328-5357

www.ndparks.com

Safety First! ND law requires youth ages 12-15, who do not have a valid drivers license, to be certified in order to legally operate a snowmobile. Successfully complete this course from 10 am-2pm course and get certified. Preregistration required. Fee $10

6

Kid Quest: Origami Discovery

701-232-3821

www.plainsart.org

For ages 5-12, families explore the Pulp Function exhibition at the Museum and discover how to turn paper into three-dimensional art. 10am-11am & 1pm-2pm, FREE event.

6 & 7 Santa Village

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com/facility_rheault

Santa & Mrs. Claus make their way to Rheault Farm for the holiday season. Open 1pm-7pm & FREE admission with donation of canned goods, toys or cash donation.

8 Heartsaver CPR Course 701-364-1704

www.fmambulance.com

The Heartsaver CPR Course covers basic adult, child, and infant CPR. Located at Merigen Medical, 3148 Fiechtner Dr. South in Fargo starting at 7pm. $30 fee. Register online.

10

Junior Artist 701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Kids ages 3-5 (with adult) experience a variety of theme related projects and explore the world of art. Kids will learn to use paint, paintbrushes, glue, chalk and many other creative materials. Location RDJ Rec Center from 1pm2:30pm. Fee: $10.60

11

Crafts for Teens

701-476-5978

www.fargolibrary.org

In time for the holidays, teens are invited from 4pm-6pm to the Carlson Public Library to make rolled beeswax candles. Sure to be a unique experience and holiday gift.

Santa Village

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com/facility_rheault

Santa & Mrs. Claus make their way to Rheault Farm for the holiday season. Open 4pm-8pm & FREE admission with donation of canned goods, toys or cash donation.

12

Disney Live! - Winnie The Pooh

701-241-9100

www.fargodome.com

Experience a perfect day in the hundred acre wood and help Piglet, Tigger, Eeyore, Rabbit and Owl as they plan a special birthday party for the lovable Winnie The Pooh at the FARGODOME. Tickets range from $13.50-$40.50 Doors open 5:30pm show starts 6:30pm.

12

Christmas Concert

701-237-0210

www.oakgrovelutheran.com

Oak Grover Lutheran presents its annual Christmas Concert in the Scheels Center for the Performing Arts. 7:30pm.

13

Santa Fly In 701-293-8043

Fargo Air Museum host Santa Fly In from noon to 4pm also the 20th. Contact for details.

13

Kids Book Club

701-241-1496

www.fargolibrary.org

For kids in grades 4 through 6 join the book club at the Dr. James Carlson Library the second Saturday of every month from 1pm-2pm. Space is limited. Contact to register.

13

Breakfast with Santa

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Spend the morning with Santa and Mrs. Claus at Rheault Farms from 8am -10am. Tickets include breakfast, craft and entertainment. Call for ticketpurchase.

13

YMCA Saturday Fun Night

Downtown Branch

701-293-9622

www.ymcacassclay.org

Kiddos ages K-8th grade enjoy a night of climbing, gym games, XerGames and more. 4:30pm-9:30pm with an evening meal and snack provided.

Art From Around the World 701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Your child will spend the morning learning more about their own country at the Robert D. Johnson Rec Center! Kids will learn about the art and culture of the United States and take home a fun project. Ages 4-8, 10am-11:30am & $10.40 fee.

13 & 14

Santa Village

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com/facility_rheault

Santa & Mrs. Claus make their way to Rheault Farm for the holiday season. Open 1pm-8pm & FREE admission with donation of canned goods, toys or cash donation.

13 & 14

Holly Jolly Zoo days

701-277-9240

www.redriverzoo.org

HO HO HO! Come visit with Santa Claus and his reindeer, have cookies, cocoa and enjoy other fun activities from 12-4pm at the Red River Zoo.

14

Lorie Line Holiday Extravaganza

701-241-9100

www.fargodome.com

Bring the entire family to the FARGODOME for Christmas costumes and music from around the world. Kids ages 4 and up will be invited to the stage to visit Santa at the North Pole. Tickets for adults range from $43.50-$50.50 and kids (4-15 yrs) $35.50. Door

14

YMCA Winter Adventure Camp Registration Deadline

701-293-9622

www.ymcacassclay.org

Kids ages 5-12 will participate in a 3-day activity camp filled with ice skating, sledding, arts, crafts, swimming, bowling and more. Camp Dates are December 29-31. Maximum participants so contact today!

14

Awesome Art Afternoon

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Come and spend an afternoon creating fun and exciting art projects at the Robert D. Johnson Rec Center. Children will be able to create a variety of art projects to take home. 1pm-3pm, FREE event.

15

Heartsaver CPR Course

701-364-1704

www.fmambulance.com

The Heartsaver CPR Course covers basic adult, child, and infant CPR. Located at Merigen Medical, 3148 Fiechtner Dr. South in Fargo starting at 7pm. $30 fee. Register online.

16

YMCA Winter Program

Session 1 Begins

701-293-9622

www.ymcacassclay.org

Don’t miss your session 1 programs starting today. Call or go online for more information.

17-19

Santa Village

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com/facility_rheault

Santa & Mrs. Claus make their way to Rheault Farm for the holiday season. Open 4pm-8pm & FREE admission with donation of canned goods, toys or cash donation.

20 & 21

Holly Jolly Zoo days

701-277-9240

www.redriverzoo.org

HO HO HO! Come visit with Santa Claus and his reindeer, have cookies, cocoa and enjoy other fun activities from 12-4pm at the Red River Zoo.

20 & 21

Santa Village

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com/facility_rheault

Santa & Mrs. Claus make their way to Rheault Farm for the holiday season. Open 1pm-8pm & FREE admission with donation of canned goods, toys or cash donation.

22

Car Seat Safety Check

701-234-5570

Is your car seat installed correctly? Don’t chance it! Make an appointment to check it out at Luther Family Buick Pontiac GMC. 1:30pm-5:30pm.

22

Pediatric First Aid Course

701-364-1704

www.fmambulance.com

This course covers basic first aid of children. Located at Merigen Medical, 3148 Fiechtner Dr. South in Fargo starting at 7pm. $35 fee. Register online.

22 & 23

Santa Village

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com/facility_rheault

Santa & Mrs. Claus make their way to Rheault Farm for the holiday season. Open 4pm-8pm & FREE admission with donation of canned goods, toys or cash donation.

31

Kids Night Out at Yunker Farm

701-232-6102

www.childrensmuseum-yunker.org

Ring in the New Year at Yunker Farm and kick of the “First Kids Night Out Celebration” from 5pm-9pm. Reservations Required!

All event listings displayed within OTMOM are carefully selected to provide diverse options for families. It is always a good idea to call ahead to confirm the information provided. Although it is not possible to list every event happening in the FM area it is encouraged organizations submit events for consideration to info@onthemindsofmoms.com

january events

1 New Years Day

Happy 2009!

3

6

8

10

Sleigh Rides

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Dashing through the snow in a one horse open sleigh. Available Saturdays from 1pm-4pm at Edgewood Chalet, enjoy a winter wonderland of fun.

3

Indoor Pool Open Swim

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Splish Splash! Hang onto the summer months by enjoying open swim every Saturday and Sunday from 1pm-5pm at Fargo South High Indoor pool. Fee: 18 and under $1.95, Adults $3.15, Family $6.30.

Aspiring Artists

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Each Tuesday from January 6th-27th, kids ages 10-13 dive deeper into the world of art and learn more about various art styles and mediums at the Robert D. Johnson Rec Center. $45.20 fee for these sessions.

7

Junior Arts

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Kids ages 3-5 (with adult) experience a variety of theme related projects and explore the world of art at the Robert D. Johnson Rec Center. Kids will learn to use paint, paintbrushes, glue, chalk and many other creative materials. 1pm2:30pm with a $10.60 fee.

Accelerated Artist

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Each Thursday from January 8-February 12, kids ages 9-12 Learn new techniques and strengthen your knowledge of art in these fun, creative workshops at the Robert D. Johnson Rec Center. $43.45 fee for these sessions.

8

Yunkie Club Session 3 Begins

701-232-6102

www.childrensmuseum-yunker.org

Yunkie Club is a preschool class held once a week for children ages 3-5. Literature, art, science, games, and snack time offers a hands on learning experience. Registration is required. Contact Children’s Museum for information.

Kids Book Club

701-241-1496

www.fargolibrary.org

For kids in grades 4 through 6 join the book club at the Dr. James Carlson Library the second Saturday of every month from 1pm-2pm. Space is limited. Contact to register.

12

Heartsaver CPR Course

701-364-1704

www.fmambulance.com

The Heartsaver CPR Course covers basic adult, child, and infant CPR. Located at Merigen Medical, 3148 Fiechtner Dr. South in Fargo starting at 7pm. $30 fee. Register online.

“If you’ve never been hated by your child, you’ve never been a parent ”

—Bette Davis

12

Artmania

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Each Monday January 12-February 16, kids ages 6-8 create many pieces of artwork using all sorts of different materials at the Robert D. Johnson Rec Center. 6:30pm-8pm with a $43.45 fee.

14

Wolf Rendezvous

701-277-9240

www.redriverzoo.org

Spend time watching wolves and discover why they howl, what they eat, and why they remind us of our pet dogs. Beginning at 9:30am kids ages 4-6 years enjoy the hour and a half pint size explorer program. $15 Fee.

17

AC/DC

701-241-9100

www.fargodome.com

Get the air guitars fired up and grab the girls for a rockin night with AC/DC. Fargodome doors open at 6:30pm.

22

Wolf Rendezvous

701-277-9240

www.redriverzoo.org

Spend time watching wolves and discover why they howl, what they eat, and why they remind us of our pet dogs.

Beginning at 2:00pm kids ages 4-6 years enjoy the hour and a half pint size explorer program. $15 Fee.

19

Heartsaver CPR Course

701-364-1704

www.fmambulance.com

The Heartsaver CPR Course covers basic adult, child, and infant CPR. Located at Merigen Medical, 3148 Fiechtner Dr. South in Fargo starting at 7pm. $30 fee. Register online.

24

Frosty Flicks Kids Winter

701-461-8902

www.marcustheatres.com

Every Saturday 10am all seats $2.50 plus FREE popcorn with paid admission. For Theatre Locations and movie listings visit online.

24

Awesome Art Afternoon

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Come and spend an afternoon creating fun and exciting art projects at the Robert D. Johnson Rec Center. Children will be able to create a variety of art projects to take home. 1pm-3pm, FREE event.

25

Family Day at the Dike

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Events for the entire family. Races, sledding, hotdogs and pop. Dike West. 1pm-4pm.

26

Pediatric First Aid Course

701-364-1704

www.fmambulance.com

This course covers basic first aid of children. Located at Merigen Medical, 3148 Fiechtner Dr. South in Fargo starting at 7pm. $35 fee. Register online.

“I’d like to be the ideal mother, but I’m too busy raising my kids ”

shutter bug

memories forever photography

rialee photography

rialee photography

rialee photography

susie b photography

susie b photography

mompreneurs two peas

Twin boys and a baby accessory were the inspiration behind starting two peas in October 2007. Crystal Maus tried several baby carriers before she came across the Moby wrap, a baby carrying system that was comfortable, stylish and versatile. No one in the FM area carried the Moby and Crystal began sharing her new find with other moms. Crystal soon turned to Geneva Noah, an acquaintance from work, when the need for models for the Moby arose. An inspired first time mom herself, Geneva also had many ideas for unique, yet practical baby accessories. In fact, the spontaneous eruptions from her daughter who suffered from acid reflux prompted the idea and design behind the Boobie Bib a better burp cloth and nursing aid. After months of discussion, Crystal and Geneva joined forces and combined their resources, their love of talking and sharing among other moms and their creative ideas and passion to form two peas, llc.

photography by | rialee photography

what kind of products does two peas offer and what makes them different and unique?

two peas is proud to design, create and offer unique handmade baby accessories. You can find shoes in a variety of hip, unexpected fabric combinations; swaddle pods, for fool-proof swaddling; pacifier clips that can accommodate all types of pacifiers (including the hard to clip soothie); bib clips that allow anything from a dinner napkin to a dish towel to be instantly turned into a bib; crayon wraps (no more fishing for the crayons at the bottom of your bag); custom tutus and crowns; pea pods, reversible onthe-go diaper and wipe cases; woobies, a tactile and visually stimulating quiet toy; and the boobie bib, an ergonomically shaped, ultra absorbent burping cloth and nursing aid. New ideas, products and designs are constantly in the works and custom orders are also available to match almost any taste and size.

being a local web based company only, how do you promote and grow your business?

We primarily promote business by talking to other

moms. Shows and women’s events have been wonderful platforms for us to introduce our designs and meet our fabulous customers in person. Plans are in the works for a one year anniversary celebration, as well as a “V.I.Pea” newsletter for the latest happenings at two peas.

how do you manage your day while working from home and being stay at home moms? Being at home with little ones will quickly prove there is no such thing as a typical day! Routine is important but the ability to be home with them has allowed for a lot of “going with the flow.” Days are filled with dress up, play dates, meal prep and clean up. Nap times are often reserved for sewing or fulfilling two peas orders. Evenings are mostly for family time—and the occasional hour or two of sewing! It’s definitely a balancing act, but our kids always come first. It took a while to get into the rhythm of being at home: learning the Sesame Street programming schedule, finding time to clean, make meals, think of creative play activities and carry on

Do you…

wake up feeling tired and drained?

have health issues that are unexplained and just won’t go away?

have places in your home nobody wants to spend time in?

have trouble growing your business?

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an adult conversation over dinner. Suddenly getting ready for work, going to the office and knowing what you needed to get done seemed so easy!

what has been the biggest misconception of being a mompreneur?

That being a mom and working from home will be easier than being a mom and working outside of the home. There aren’t many clear-cut rules about how you want your household or your business to run— they’re yours to create. Sometimes a guide book on what to do as a parent, how to do it and when to fit it all into your day would be a beautiful thing!

what is the most important thought you would like to share with other moms who might be considering new businesses?

It’s easy to get caught up in the excitement of owning your business, bringing your designs to life and talking to others who feel the same way and want to

lia sophia

SHARE THE LOVE OF JEWELRY®

Love to dream? We do, too.

Love being on the cutting edge!

Love sharing celebrity styles!

Love being your own boss; the CEO!

Love the flexible schedule!

Love how much you can earn!

Love the training & support!

Love how we celebrate success!

buy your creations. But it won’t be perfect. In order to get it all done, you may not get a shower or dinner that night might be delivered in, but if you can keep on top of your mind what is right for your family and the kind of wife and mother you want to be it will all work out.

what else should we know about two peas?

two peas strongly promotes carrying your baby and is proud to offer a variety of comfortable and stylish baby carriers including our own line of baby slings. One thing that sets two peas apart is that we consult with moms who are interested in wearing their babies in one of our wraps or slings. We are constantly researching the best and most innovative products and fabrics for your baby. Eco-friendly two peas has been distributing clothing lines from babysoy—the first company in the world to use soybean protein fiber in the construction of their newborn clothing. two peas also has the capability to customize babysoy layettes with their designer touches, making them truly your own.

“I never thought it would be possible, but I’m doing something I love, working from home, & taking time for what really matters; MY FAMILY.”

two peas, llc

website: www.twopeaspod.com

email: crystal@twopeaspod.com or geneva@twopeaspod.com

phone: 701.799.1418 or 701.793.8618

shop talk

music + movement = milestones

story by | heidi koepplin —kindermusik with heidi sue

Picture

this: you’re in your living room with your little ones, the TV is off (I know it’s hard to imagine, but the TV is off) and you are doing your best American Idol rendition of “wheels on the bus”. You might not be the next Carrie Underwood, but you’re having fun and actually helping your child develop better coordination and language skills. Studies show music has a positive impact on a child’s ability to learn. Making and responding to music can help

a child use scissors or kick a ball, as well as have a positive impact on their sense of self-esteem and self-expression. Music, dance and drama also foster creative thinking skills in pretend play, enhancing children’s ability to think in different ways.

Don Campbell, author of the Mozart Effect, traced neurological development during childhood and found learning occurs through movement and quick emotional associations. For example, by age two, the brain and body connect via marching, dancing and developing a sense of physical rhythm. Other research has found that young people who participate in the arts, such as music, are more likely to: receive academic achievement

• be elected as a school class officer

• participate in math and science fairs

• win an award for school attendance, writing an

• essay or a poem read for pleasure

• perform community service

• participate in youth groups and attend music,

• art and dance classes

The Fargo-Moorhead area offers a variety of opportunities to expose your children to music and movement, whether it is through Kindermusik classes or private music or dance lessons. There are free concerts throughout the summer, as well as upcoming holiday programs to take advantage of. Remember to set the stage at home, too. Incorporate music into the simplest of activities. A silly song about getting your kids dressed in the morning or even singing in the tub is always a delight. Encouraging them to make up their own song or dance will get their creative juices flowing and their imaginations growing. So, let me hear you, the wheels on the bus go ‘round and ‘round, ‘round and ‘round…

I am in my second year of owning, operating and instructing classes for Kindermusik with Heidi Sue. I offer semester classes for you and your newborn to 5 year old child. For more information on spring registration, call 701.238.0451, email kindermusikwithheidisue@yahoo.com or visit http://heidisue.kindermusik.net source: kindermusik international website

less pain… more ice cream!

story by | dr. william c. porter

We’veall heard of tonsils, but what do they do? And when they need to be removed, what is the best option?

Tonsils are the clumps of tissue located on both sides of the back of your throat. Their function is to fight infection by trapping bacteria and viruses

entering through the throat and producing antibodies. The most common reason tonsils are removed is because they are too large and block the throat. This can result in interference with normal breathing, nasal sinus drainage, sleeping, swallowing and speaking. Tonsils can also aggravate snoring and can even cause sleep apnea -- an occasional stoppage of breathing. Recurring tonsillitis, infection of the tonsils, is also a reason for removal. Common

photography by | scott thuen

guidelines for removal due to tonsillitis include: occurring 3-4 times per year for three consecutive years or longer; 5 times per year for two consecutive years with no prior problems; or 6-7 times in a twelve month period, with no prior problems.

Your childhood tonsillectomy may bring back memories of a painful experience. A traditional tonsillectomy involves using heat, at temperatures of 300-400 degrees, to remove the tonsils. This causes significant damage to surrounding healthy tissue resulting in increased pain and recovery time. Now there is a better option for our kids called Coblation.

Coblation combines gentle radiofrequency energy with saline to quickly and safely remove tonsils. Currents are delivered through a hand held wand that is cooled by the saline. The molecular structure of the tonsils is broken down and the tissue is quickly cut through and removed. This procedure touches only the tonsils, resulting in minimal damage to the surrounding tissue.

Coblation takes less than 30 minutes and is done under general anesthesia. Most patients stay in the surgery center only 2-3 hours after surgery and are then able to go home. Down time at home is also significantly reduced in most cases. Most patients report less pain and are able to return to normal activity and diet within just a few days. Traditional tonsillectomies typically required up to 10 to 14 days for recovery time.

At William C. Porter, MD, you will find a medical practice that is surrounded by friendliness from the moment you walk in. since 1984, Dr. Porter has treated thousands of patients with proven treatments for children’s ear nose and throat conditions, sinus problems, sleep disorders, breathing problems, nasal blockage, voice and swallowing difficulties, hearing loss and more. The first to bring coblation to the fm area, Dr. Porter has successfully performed the procedure on nearly 200 patients. For more information call 701.235.0161 or 866.96.ENTMD or visit www.PorterENT.com.

100 South 4th Street, Suite 608

Fargo, ND

mod mom

anne kuzas

age 49

information technology

married mom of 16 year old daughter and 12 year old son

my definition of a mod mom is…

A mod mom should be encouraging, flexible and always keeping the family organized and where they are supposed to be when they are supposed to be there! Also, able to make time for herself in her hectic daily life and spend quality time with family and friends.

the best advice i can give my kids…

My favorite saying is “you get out of something what you put into it” – which to me means to put forth your best effort in everything you do. Do your best and you will go far!

photography by | rialee photography

one thing my husband has given me that i can’t live without…

His love and of course, my wedding ring! He helps me get through the tough times and makes the happy times that much better! I look forward to seeing him at the end of each day – to share our day’s events and just spend time together. He is my best friend and I would be lost without him.

favorite healthy meal i actually enjoy…

Baked halibut, greek rice pilaf, asparagus, a greek salad made by Bill’s mom (my mother-in-law) and a glass of red wine!

three words my kids would use to best describe me are… Caring, loving, outgoing!

my biggest mom moment was…

The birth of each child. Another is noticing how many things I do with my kids that my mom did with me. Hopefully I can be a good teacher to my kids like my mom was for me.

i keep my marriage fresh by…

Taking time to spend with my husband, whether it be together at home, watching the kids activities or out with friends. Life can get so busy, but you must take time to be together. Put forth the effort to do it and forget about the things that aren’t getting done at home like laundry, yard work, etc. One thing we have done over the years is surprise each other with

plans for a night out. We send a card to the spouse at their office that says “babysitter has been arranged, dinner and a movie date night”. It is a great surprise and a nice way to make each other feel special.

one of the best books i have ever read…

The “Last Lecture” by Randy Paunch. After watching the video of his last lecture and following his story, I just had to get this book. He has some great insights into everyday living. Most of all, he reminds us to live each day to the fullest and be happy no matter what.

the last thing i say to my kids at night is…

Goodnight, I love you.

something else you should know about me is…

I absolutely love to travel, whether it is with my husband, my family or a group of friends! I enjoy getting away from it all and seeing the world. I feel that travel is an important part of our children’s education and we typically plan our vacation as a family. Oh yeah – and I love bison football!

photography by | scott thuen

gettin’ through it

story by | deb abbey

setting limits with yes

“NO! Get down from there… NO! You can’t have Cheetos for dinner… NO! You can’t stay out till 2 a.m. NO! Leave the cat’s tail alone!... NO, NO, NO…” Sound familiar? The average two year old hears the word NO every 7-8 waking minutes! No wonder it’s often the first word out of their cute little mouths and they throw it right back at us in equal or greater numbers. As parents, we get tired of saying it and our kids get tired of hearing it. When NO is constantly being heard, kids eventually learn to ignore it or tune it out. Additionally, this over use can result in associating ‘maybe’ or even ‘yes’ as the actual meaning of NO.

Foster Cline, M.D. and Jim Fay, founders of “Parenting with Love and Logic”, advocate that parents should use the word NO as seldom as possible and use it only when they really mean it. Cline and Fay believe battles can be avoided by replacing NO with YES. Confusing? Are you having visions of a world gone crazy with un-bathed kids eating ice cream for breakfast? How can we possibly set healthy limits using the word YES more than NO? Thinking words, choices, and empathy are concepts offered by Cline and Fay as alternatives to saying NO all too often.

thinking words or fighting words

Many parents set limits by issuing commands. This may produce the desired results, but these kids aren’t benefiting from learning to think for themselves. Our kids learn more when the lessons are the result of their own choices. Commands are fighting words and fighting words are a “call to arms” between parent and child. Subtle changes can effectively set limits without turning the situation into a battle. Notice the difference in the following statements:

Fighting Words – ‘No, you can’t go out to play until your homework is done.’

Thinking Words – ‘Yes, you can go out to play as soon as you’ve finished your homework.’

When parents give direction and set limits using thinking words they are prompting their child to think while still making it clear what will be allowed, “Feel free to turn on the TV as soon as you’ve practiced piano,” what they will do, “I’ll be happy to take you to the park as soon as you’ve picked up your toys,” and what they will provide, “You can eat your lasagna or you can wait to eat again at breakfast.” When situations are approached in this manner, kids learn to think for themselves. They are allowed to make a choice and learn from the consequences. Setting limits in this manner encourages more thinking and less arguing. Now, this isn’t the cure to end all complaining, whining and foot stomping, but it can bring more peace to your home.

choices or demands

Gift-giving greatness.

Generic gifts got you down? Well, wake up your inner gifting genius! I have gift ideas that are anything but blah. Gifts girls adore. Gifts guys gotta have. Any budget. Any occasion. Any time. I’m here to make your life easier! Just ask!

Christy Huber

Consultant Name ‡

Independent Beauty Consultant ‡

Cadillac Sales Director

Mary Kay® Personal Web Site Address ‡

Phone Number ‡

www.marykay.com/christyhuber

701.306.7850

Gift-giving greatness.

Generic gifts got you down? Well, wake

Gift-giving greatness.

Paper or plastic? Cash or credit? Eat in or take out? White or wheat? Morning or afternoon? Although as adults we can get overwhelmed with the many choices we make on a daily basis, it does give us a feeling of control. It is much more empowering to be a decision maker rather than being constantly directed by what you CAN’T do. Guess what? Kids feel the same way. Offering choices puts the responsibility of decision making on the child and teaches them to think for themselves while, without even recognizing it, setting limits. Both parent and child have control!

Here’s how it works; you give two choices, both of which you are comfortable with and, this is most important, you present the choices calmly and without any sarcasm whatsoever. For example, “Would you rather practice piano before or after you have your snack? ”

Generic gifts got you down? Well, wake up your inner gifting genius! I have gift ideas that are anything but blah. Gifts girls adore. Gifts guys gotta have. Any budget. Any occasion. Any time. I’m here to make your life easier! Just ask!

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Phone Number ‡

Cline and Fay acknowledge that an occasional NO is inevitable, but we can resist saying NO too often or over every little thing. These early interactions set the tone for your future relationship with that toddler soon turned adolescent, so beware!

Gift-giving greatness.

Generic gifts got you down? Well, wake up your inner gifting genius! I have gift ideas that are

Get healthy on the inside

empathy or anger

When parents angrily issue a consequence, say “I told you so,” or lecture on and on about the mistake their child made, the child tends to be more focused on the parent’s anger than on their poor choice and resulting consequence. Alternatively, when consequences are given with the “sugar” of empathy, anger is lessened and the problem is turned back over to the child. Consider this common scenario:

You and the family are sitting down to dinner. Lasagna, one of little Maxwell’s favorites, is on the menu. You dish up Maxwell’s plate expecting him to glow with appreciation for his mother’s efforts. Instead he states, “Yuck... I hate lasagna... that stuff is gross.” The battle lines have been drawn! But you calmly respond, “No problem” and take Maxwell’s plate away while Dad reassuringly states, “Bummer... you’re probably going to be pretty hungry by morning. I’ll be sure to have a good breakfast for you. You can be excused.”

Cline and Fay state that a parent’s empathetic response to a child’s mistake and its consequences actually results in the lesson of the experience resonating at a much deeper level for the child. The empathy demonstrates unconditional love and builds the relationship between parent and child while the consequences do the teaching.

The founders of “Parenting with Love and Logic” make no claim that their perspective on parenting is any better than all the others or that all of their techniques will miraculously work. All techniques will work some of the time and none will work all of the time. Cline and Fay’s goal is simply to assist parents in teaching kids to be responsible, to think, to problem solve, and to experience the results of their choices. Give children the opportunity to experience failures and learn lessons through consequences. I heard that gasp... yes, it’s good parenting to allow your kids to experience failures. It prepares them for adulthood when failure can hold much more life-altering consequences. So, consider these alternatives to NO and conduct your own experiment. And remember, the purpose of setting limits and disciplining is to teach.

source: “Parenting with Love and Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility” by Foster Cline, MD and Jim Fay. Pinon Press, 2006.

Dr. Susan Mathison and Dr. Lesley Soine, along with the Catalyst Medical Center team, care for patients of all ages, enhancing their inner health.

Medical Services

• Ear, Nose & Throat

• Allergy & Sinus Disorders

• Head & Neck Surgery

• Sleep Disorders & Snoring

• Skin Cancer Treatment

• Hearing testing

• Hearing-aid fitting and services

• Limited balance evaluation

• Tinnitus therapy

• Noise exposure education

• Noise protection

• Custom ear molds for electronic devices

1800 21st Ave South Fargo, ND 58103 701.365.8700

catalystmedicalcenter.com

the in her years

life julie kottsick

“Yes, I used to wonder, is this all there is? Isn’t there more to life? And now I see that this is it, there isn’t any more, we already have far more than we deserve and yet we take it for granted.”

story by | lisa gulland-nelson

Weakness

in her left hand, an undetectable slur in her voice, a slight loss of balance a year before her doctor, she knew. In 2004, 36 year old Julie Kottsick was diagnosed with Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS), also known as Lou Gehrig’s disease. “I fell to my knees and I thought what are we going to do? I asked God to carry it for me. Almost instantly I knew I was not alone. We’re not alone.”

ALS is a progressive neurodegenerative disease that attacks nerve cells in the brain and spinal cord that control voluntary muscles. The muscles you use every day without a second thought; those to walk, talk, or breathe, stop working. Four years of living with the disease has robbed Julie of many physical abilities, but it has given her a new perspective on life. Last winter Julie constructed a book of pictures, quotes and her own writings to share this perspective on life with her kids; 11 year old Evan and 8 year old Carly. She titled it “Life Tends to Smile on Those Who Smile Back” as interpreted by Julie Kottsick.

“The title is actually a quote from Noah benShea and it really resonated with me,” Julie explained. “Before ALS, people had always commented that when they saw me, I was usually smiling, and after ALS that is still the case. I have always felt as though life smiles on me and I hope and pray that I encourage it by smiling back. Some days it (a smile) is all I have to offer in return for people’s concern and generosity.”

“Making the book was a very healing project,” Julie explained. “I have a great deal of satisfaction knowing that someday our kids can pull out the book and get a sense of how I might view a situation and if the “advice” helps them, great, if not, at least they may know where I stand.”

Life Tends to Smile… We knew all the statistics and they were not pretty. I was painfully aware of what ALS would take from me, but I had no idea what it would give to me. Gradually, gifts were revealed, gifts that are given to us all, but often go unnoticed; the revelations of time, community, gratitude, humility, faith and clarity.

The average lifespan of someone with ALS is two to five years. The ALS website refers to medically documented cases where the disease stops progressing or progresses at an incredibly slow rate, but it also claims lives much faster. “We’ve seen people come and go in six months,” said Bud, Julie’s husband of 13 years. “We spend our days trying to forget and then

photography by | rialee photography

when someone passes reality kind of slaps us in the face,” Added Julie. “It’s tough because there’s no treatment and no cure.”

Life Tends to Smile… I no longer wish time away. ALS has revealed the value of a year, a month, a week, a day. I tell my family and friends that I love them. I say it out loud, I write it in notes, I do my best to reveal it in my actions. Today is a gift that is why they call it “the present”.

Before ALS, Julie was an active member of the FargoMoorhead community. She worked for the Holiday Inn as the Director of Sales and was on several Chamber of Commerce committees. Once she was diagnosed, she resigned from her job and said goodbye to her old life to face the next chapter. “I traded in my high heels for sneakers and through that gained a whole new perspective,” she joked.

Day by day. That is the approach Julie and Bud have instilled in Evan and Carly. “We never lie about it (ALS), but in the same token, we don’t know what’s coming,” explained Julie. “We just keep telling them this the way it is today. I can’t help you take a jump shot, but I can be there to cheer you on.”

“No one knows what tomorrow brings. I try to say yes a lot more. Not to things, but if the kids want me to watch them play or play a game, stay up half hour later, eat popcorn for lunch.” But Julie added, “It breaks my heart that I can’t do Carly’s hair.”

Life Tends to Smile… Please don’t feel pity for me, for I am richer than some will ever be, but take the time to seize the day, make a difference, practice gratitude and enjoy the gifts we all take for granted.

The Kottsicks have a family mission statement…Practice gratitude, lend a hand, you can make a difference and give us all a reason for hope.

“We’re blessed with so many wonderful friends and my parents live next door.” The Kottsicks said Julie’s parents have provided needed help allowing Julie to get out of the house much more. “The support from family and friends has made this exponentially more doable.” Bud said.

“We have been so blessed and given so much love, support, money and prayers. I want the kids to know the importance of giving back,” Julie explained. “With everything we have received and been given, I want them to know they have the power to do that for someone else.”

Life Tends to Smile…We have no way of knowing the twists and turns our lives will take (this is a good thing!) but through it all, friendship remains our constant companion and many days, it’s the strength that helps us drive on.

A group of Julie’s friends take turns helping her each week. The group, part of the national Share the Care volunteer organization, helps Julie with just about anything. Kristi Ulrich is part of the group and has known Julie for eight years. “There are sixteen of us that rotate weeks to do something with Julie, or for Julie,” she explained. “Sometimes it’s bringing lunch over and visiting with her or other times it could be preparing dinner for Julie and her family. It’s helping out with whatever Julie happens to need that week.”

“I live vicariously through them,” Julie admits. “I love hearing about their boss or crabby co-worker. They keep me strong.” Julie has also had the opportunity to impact her friends. “Beautiful is a word that comes to mind when I think of Julie,” explains Kristi. “Not only the exterior beauty that is Julie, but the inner beauty that radiates each and every time you see her or talk with her. Julie has remained very positive throughout her battle.”

Life Tends to Smile…There are many stories of individuals faced with adversity, yet our businesses and citizens never seem to wane on compassion…I continue to marvel at the generosity of our neighbors and friends, and that of complete strangers.

About six months after Julie’s diagnosis, several friends organized a dinner, raffle and silent auction. Kristi was one of the organizers and never doubted the success they would have. “In my mind I had set a rather high number that I believed we could achieve. Julie has touched so many lives that I thought we wouldn’t have trouble raising the funds. It was a remarkable evening, filled with love and generosity. [It was] a huge success due to the many, many friends that Julie has.”

The money raised allowed the Kottsicks to remodel their home and make life a little bit easier. They added an elevator, widened doorways, restructured Julie’s bathroom and purchased a handicap accessible van. Julie recalled the impact the event had, “This tremendous show of generosity literally changed our lives by helping us avoid taking on additional debt.”

Although most of the time Julie can laugh and take what life throws her, there are days when reality is too much. “We have pity parties once in a while.” Julie said.

Life Tends to Smile…Poor Me. Poor Julie. Poor Mommy. This is what we say at our house one day a month. It’s not a predetermined day, I just wake up one day and make an announcement and that’s it. All day I mope around and Bud and the kids say, “Poor Julie, Poor Mommy” a lot. Then I cry every 30 minutes or so and get lots of extra hugs and go to bed and it’s over until next month. We’re way too busy for any more of that crap.

When her pity party is over, Julie gets to work helping to raise money and awareness for the ALS Association. Julie said it took a while for her to realize advocating and fundraising for ALS was something she should be doing. “I thought that would be selfish, but as I moved along I realized that if the people with ALS don’t advocate for it no one will.”

The family has made advocating a priority. They took part in a walk helping to raise $40,000 for the ALS

Association. Bud and Julie also made a trip to Washington, D.C to speak to the North Dakota delagation and Congress. “It’s not about finding a cure for me. It’s about the other Evans and Carlys out there.”

Life Tends to Smile…I have always believed that everything that happens in our lives is part of a Divine plan. Everything happens for a reason; it is not for us to understand and it is not for us to question.

Julie’s book includes letters to her children. She said, “You never ask about the day you were born until you have kids.” She explained the day each entered the world and the wishes she has for them. “I want Evan to trust himself and his instincts. Carly, I want her to be open to other opinions and know not everyone is going to agree with her.”

Julie said it’s important to know that what happens, happens for a reason. “Trust, trust in yourself, trust that whatever is happening in your life is happening

for a reason, and we have the power to decide how to react to it. We can let it consume us, or we can hop into the driver’s seat and steer.”

Life Tends to Smile…In three whirlwind years, I can no longer lift my arms higher than my waist, hold anything more than 3 pounds, walk further than 50 feet, get out of a chair unassisted and my slow, slurred speech is often hard to understand. I never thought it would happen to me, but unfortunately, I am not alone.

It is estimated that about 30,000 people have ALS. Julie had advice for those facing challenges like ALS. “I would want them to know they should not be too overwhelmed. There’s still hope.” Julie said she still lives a normal life with ALS. It’s just a “new normal.” “You can still enjoy many things. There’s no need worrying about tomorrow.”

Life Tends to Smile… No, I don’t feel cheated, I feel gifted. I have an insight to life on earth that most people will never experience and the time to share it.

“It’s very human to always want more. A diagnosis like this really makes you step back and say what’s really important, and to me I think its people. Love each other, be kind.”

One of Julie’s favorite quotes is by Abraham Lincoln and it hangs in her living room; “and in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count, but the life in your years” and with courage and a contagious smile, Julie lives that quote. In Julie’s words “Seize the Day!”

down the aisle

photography by | scott thuen

The wind is howling, the snow is flying and the kids are hungry. And guess what? They’re bored too! OK, let’s be honest; they are driving you crazy over the holiday break! Sounds like a recipe for some easy comfort food and a cool art project. Moving away from the traditional holiday menu and busy holiday schedules, we have dedicated this Down the Aisle to easy cooking coupled with a craft.

chicken tortilla soup

Servings: 12

Ingredients:

2 pounds cooked chicken breast cubed or two 13 oz. of canned chicken

2 cans Fiesta Nacho Cheese soup

2 cans cream of chicken soup

2 soup cans milk

2 cans enchilada sauce (mild only)

Crushed tortilla chips

Shredded cheddar cheese

Directions: Combine all soups, milk and enchilada sauce. KEEP THE CANS. Bring to a boil over low heat. Watch carefully and stir often as it will burn easily. Add chicken and heat thoroughly. Next (the best part)…serve it up with crushed tortilla chips & shredded cheddar cheese and eat up. Repeat last line as desired!

tin can caddy

Turning trash into treasure is child’s play when you look to the recycling bin for inspiration. Repurpose the soup cans from your Mexican Chicken Tortilla soup and keep all those markers, pens, crayons, pencils and other art supplies in one place with this handy caddy.

Caddy How-To

To make the caddy handle, YOU, not your child, 1. drill 3 overlapping 1-inch holes in the center of a 8-inch x 6-inch piece of ¾-inch plywood. Kids, now it’s your turn. Sand the edges of the 2. plywood and paint with latex paint. Crimp rough edges of soup cans, if necessary. 3. Drill a small hole in the side of each can, ¾-inch 4. from the top; screw 1/2-inch screws from the insides of cans into wood on an angle, aligning tops of cans as shown. source: www.marthastewart.com

resources, support, volunteer

Find Help, Get Answers, Make a Difference

FM Dads 2nd and 4th Monday of each month at 6:30pm. For dads seeking parenting skills - Call for location an details 701.237.0359

Eating Disorders Group Every Monday at 5pm. For family and friends of loved ones with eating disorders. Eating Disorder Institute 701.234.4111

DivorceCare for Kids 13 week session for kids ages 5 to 12 from 6:30pm to 8:30pm at Hope Lutheran South Campus – Call for session dates 701.235.6629

New Red River Moms Of Multiples 2nd Tuesday of each month at 6:30pm in the Community Room at West Acres. For more information visit www.rrvmothersofmultiples.org

New La Leche League of Fargo-Moorhead 3rd Thursday of each month at 6:30pm. For more information contact Jull Christianson – jillkensok@hotmail.com or 701.298.8950

Moms Night Out 3rd Thursday of each month at 7pm. For moms of kids with diabetes. West Acres Food Court. For more information visit www.jdrf.org/Minnesota.com

Child Asperger Support Group Every Tuesday from 12:00pm to 1:00pm at Southeast Human Service Center. For additional information visit www.rrvasperger.org

Fargo-Moorhead Home Schoolers Christian home schooling Moms who want to network ideas and provide support to homeschooling families For more information contact Karen - jkisgrig@msn.com or call 701.967.8990

Breastfeeding Support Group Meets once a month from 6pm to 7pm at Innovis Health. Call 701.364.8100 or visit www. innovishealth.com for more information and other support group opportunities.

MOPS Mothers of Preschoolers in FM Area:

Atonement Lutheran Church Every other Tuesday from 8:45am to 11:00am. For more information call 701.280.1447

Bethel Evangelical Free Church Meets every other Tuesday at 8:45am to 11:00am. For more information contact 701.232.4476

Calvary Baptist Church 2nd and 4th Tuesday of each month starting at 6:30pm at Calvary Baptist Church 701.232.6010

First Assembly of God 2nd and 4th Tuesday of each month from 9:00 to11:00 am. For more information call 701.232.0003

First Lutheran Church 1st and 3rd Tuesday from 9:00 to11:00 am. For more information call 701.235.7389

First United Methodist 1st and 3rd Thursday of each month from 9:15am to11:15am. Moms of children newborn through kindergarten are invited as well. Contact Jessica 701.364.9570.

Grace Evangelical Lutheran Church 2nd Sunday of each month from 2:00 to 4:00 pm. For more information call 701.232.1516

Hope Lutheran Church South Campus 3rd Saturday of each month from 9am to 11am. Contact Amy 293.3279 (Begins September 20th)

Olivet Lutheran Church 1st and 3rd Thursday of each month at 9:00 to 11:15 am. For more information call. 701.235.6603

Riding On Angels’ Wings Therapeutic horseback riding for children with disabilities. Volunteers are always welcome. Contact Bette Shipley - Felton, MN 701.793.5153 or www.ridingonangelswings.org

Make-A-Wish Foundation of ND Nations largest wish granting organization. Ways to help: volunteer, donate, sponsor or refer a child. Contact ND Chapter in Fargo 701.280.9474 or visit www.ndwish.org

Ronald McDonald House of RRV A home-away-fromhome for families when a child is ill. Support or Volunteer. Call 701.232.3980 or visit www.rmhcfargo.org

YWCA of Cass Clay Provide services and programs for women of all ages. Support, volunteer, donate. Call 701.232.3449 or visit www.ywcacassclay.org

United Way Work to make our community a better place to live, work and raise our families. To give, advocate, volunteer. Call 701.237.5050 or visit www.uwcc.net

Rape & Abuse Crisis Center Crisis intervention, advocacy, and counseling services to all persons who have been victims of domestic violence or sexual abuse. Volunteer or donate. Call 701.293.7273 or visit www. raccfm.com

Special Olympics Provides year-round sports training for all kids and adults with intellectual disabilities. Volunteer Contact Laura 701.730.0926 or visit www.specialolympics.org

Camp Fire USA Builds caring, confident youth and future leaders. Contact Myrna Johnson 218. 236.1090 or visit www.campfire.org

New Moms and More 1st Tuesday of each month from 6:30pm to 8:30pm and 3rd Tuesday from 11am to 1pm for play dates. Fargo Baptist Church 701.232.5500

New Red River Celiacs 1st Saturday of each month at Sydney’s Health Market. For more information contact Stacey Juhnke at redriverceliacs@gluten.net

New Sleep Disorder Support Group Meets monthly at Grace Methodist Church –Moorhead For more information contact Donna at 218.494.3443

New Doulas of the Red River Valley 1st Tuesday of each month from 7pm to 9pm at Ristretto’s. For more information call Jen at 218.287.51783

Now There’s a Better Choice of Treatment

Coblation Assisted Tonsillectomy is a quick outpatient procedure. is simple surgery is the gentle alternative o ering rapid recovery and minimal pain, with most patients resuming a normal diet and activities within just a few days.

Whether your child su ers from tonsillitis or even recurrent ear infections and earaches, Dr. Porter is sensitive to the needs of children and the concerns of parents.

Board-certified ear, nose & throat specialist

Performing pediatric ENT surgery since 1984 Dr. Porter, himself a father, is great at relating to kids

If you are part of a group, have a resource, or offer a class and would like to share with FM area moms and their families help us grow our list by dropping us a note at info@onthemindsofmoms.com.

I’m not going to vacuum until Sears makes one you can ride on

—Rosanne Barr

this and that mom are you? what kind of

The Exaggerator This is the mom who will never admit to anything that may be slightly askew in the household. She paints a beautiful rosy picture, when we all know it’s never that perfect. “My sweet baby Sara is doing great! She’s such an easy baby. She has been sleeping through the night, every night, since she was two months old. She cries only when she’s hungry or needs to be changed, and she loves to go out for long periods of time! ” Be aware that this does differ from a proud mom who brags about her babies. Bragging is really a wonderful perk of motherhood.

The Comparer Posing as an interested mom, this is the type who constantly asks you questions about your baby, not because she is really that interested,

but to compare her child to yours. “ So, when was it that Susie started sitting up on her own? When did she roll over? What kind of formula is she on? Is she sleeping through the night? ” This mom rarely gives up any information on her kids, and places all the attention on you and your family. News flash: She’s digging, not interested.

The Scatterbrain This mom lost her mind when she had a baby. She is late to everything, her house is a disaster, and she always looks like a total mess. She can’t seem to manage anything. Whenever you talk to her, she sounds like she’s on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Get a grip, sister you CAN do this thing called motherhood.

The Inquisitor Somewhat similar to The Comparer, however, this mom asks you 1000 parenting questions because she is too lazy to buy a book or do some research online. She asks you everything, so that she can cherry-pick from your knowledge of discounts, deals, and parenting tips and then go about her day—while offering you no new information in return. For instance, have you ever been in a seemingly endless questioning session from a particular mom when she actually asks you where she should buy diapers from. Um, the store! It’s not rocket science!

The Chimer-Inner This is that mom at the grocery store, the mall, or anywhere out in public, who decides to just give random, unsolicited advice about your child. She “chimes in” so to speak, when she was never asked her opinion, much less even looked at or acknowledged by you. She usually starts the conversation with the seemingly harmless question, “Is this your first?” She actually thinks that because she had a baby first, you somehow really long to hear her foolproof way to get your child to stop fussing at the cash register. You know you just want to say “Zip it, lady. You don’t like advice from strangers, and neither do I.”

The Depressor This one is the WORST to be around. Everything is negative. The baby is fussy all the time, her husband won’t help around the house, they have no money, and she hates how she looks. She uses you as her therapist. By the time she finishes her venting marathon and actually asks “So, how are you?,” you are so worn out you just say “Great,” end the conversation, and head for the nearest bottle of wine to lift your spirits after that downer of a chat. Even though The Depressor can be a downer she might be the only one of these gals you don’t mind keeping around because she makes you feel a whole lot better about your own life!

source: www.Kaboose.com

story by | sheri kleinsasser stockmoe

grow ready, set

Food…a necessary staple of life, but this necessity can also bring many concerns and challenges. As our kids grow our focus evolves, but the goal remains the same; to raise healthy, strong young adults. Here are some facts, tips and general info on food for our kids as they grow.

Thatsweet wee one! This miracle of life comes home with a simple schedule: eat, sleep, poop & repeat. The poop happens when the other steps are followed and hopefully the sleep happens more than less. The eating part of the equation allows for some decision making on your part, but still you really aren’t the one in control!

enough?

Initially you have one thing to worry about… breast or bottle? With our wee ones, our first concern is whether they are eating enough. With formula, the math is rather simple:

what you put in the bottle - what is left in the bottle

= amount eaten by wee one

Prior to solid foods, your wee one will eat about 2.5 ounces per pound of body weight in a twenty-four hour period. So, 10 pound Billy should eat around 25 ounces of formula in a day. Obviously, breast feeding doesn’t allow you to actually see or measure what your wee one is getting, but there are signs he’s getting proper nourishment:

After eating, your wee one is relaxed

and satisfied.

Your breasts feel softer after nursing because

they have been emptied. After regaining his initial birth weight, your

wee one continues to gain weight (many wee ones lose between 5 and 9 percent of their birth weight, but gain it back in the first 2 weeks). Once your wee one is getting milk, not

colostrums, he should have around 6 wet diapers a day.

Everybody poops! Your wee one should have at • least 3 per day the first month. After the first month, he may go less frequently. Breast fed wee ones may even skip a day now and then.

If ever you have any concerns that your wee one isn’t getting all they need, talk to your trusted doctor.

gimme a spoon

Introducing solid foods can be challenging, messy and scary for us as parents. Timing is the first hurdle. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends starting solid foods at six months. Prior to this your wee one should get all their calories and nutrients from breast milk or formula, but like everything there are exceptions to the rule. As early as 4 months your wee one may show signs of transitioning readiness. Those signs include having head control, sitting well, losing extrusion reflex (tongue pushing food out), display chewing motions, significant weight gain, growing appetite, and an interest in what’s going from your plate to your mouth. Solid food introduction should start with rice cereal, then fruits & vegetables and lastly table food. As we introduce more “people” food, choking is a common fear. Keep things pea sized, don’t leave your wee one alone when he’s eating and get trained on infant/child CPR! Knowing what to do when a situation arises is the best insurance policy.

wee ones (0–18 months)

newborns usually double their weight by 6 months.

All that energy in our sweet tot. She has to be hungry, but meal time turns your tot into a stone faced, no eating, stare down artist. Our tots are establishing their independence, which can translate into meal time battles.

tots

live to eat… eat to live

Fortunately, our tots (without medical complications) will eat according to their instincts. When to eat and how much to maintain their caloric needs is why you will see your tot eat everything in sight one month and what seems like nothing the next month. The growth rate of our tots is about one-third to one-half of what it was as a wee one so don’t be alarmed when she is eating less than usual. She simply might not need as much food to sustain development. On average your tot will need about 1,000 calories per day via 3 meals and a couple of snacks. So, respect your tots hunger or lack thereof. A good rule of thumb, average your toddler’s intake over the week as opposed to worrying about the day.

hold the nuts

Milk, eggs, soy, wheat, tree nuts, shellfish, and peanuts are among the most common foods causing allergies. Luckily, most kids will outgrow their food allergy. In fact, about 80% of those allergic to milk, 80% to wheat or soy and about two-thirds of those allergic to eggs will outgrow the allergy. Other food allergies, such as those to peanuts or tree nuts, will see only about 20% and 10% outgrow the allergy respectively. Fish and shellfish allergies are rarely outgrown and usually develop later in life.

Knowing the signs of an allergic reaction is important. A mild reaction will include:

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•

•

•

Itchiness or red bumps (hives)

Mild skin redness and swelling

Stuffy, runny nose, sneezing

Itchy, watery eyes

A more severe reaction will include:

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•

•

•

•

Swelling of the face or mouth

Difficulty swallowing or speaking

Wheezing or difficulty breathing

Abdominal pain, nausea, vomiting or diarrhea

Dizziness or fainting

When a reaction occurs:

• mild or you have concerns.

Contact your doctor if the reaction is more than

With a mild reaction, give an oral

• antihistamine, such as Children’s Benadryl. If the reaction is severe and you have an

• injectable epinephrine, use it.

Seek emergency medical care if the symptoms

• are those of a severe reaction, your child was exposed to a food or substance that has triggered a severe reaction in the past or if you administered an injectable epinephrine.

(18 months –3 years)

the FDA estimates 6% of kids younger than 3 years old have some kind of food allergy.

Preschoolers are learning to follow direction whether it is at preschool, church or kindergarten. Unfortunately this obedience doesn’t always find its way home or during meal time. Our active preschoolers need nutrients to keep going throughout the day, but sometimes they don’t always see it that way.

picky, picky, picky

One minute your preschooler loves eggs, the next can’t stand them. With no rhyme or reason your preschooler’s eating behavior can unpredictably change from week to week, day to day or even meal

to meal. We call them picky, but typically these preschoolers are trying to exert their desire to be in control. It also needs to be remembered that kids taste food differently than we do. Your preschooler is more sensitive to strong flavors and usually will prefer bland foods. Pickiness may even be an instinctive protective mechanism as the gastrointestinal tract of your preschooler is not mature. Mother

Nature may just be protecting your preschooler from a tummy ache. Here are a few tips to minimize your meal time battles:

Stay calm. 1. Don’t create a battle of wills. Threats and punishments may only reinforce the struggle.

We’re in the neighborhood. Call today.

Kindermusik with Heidi Sue

Heidi Koepplin ∙ Licensed Kindermusik Educator

Phone: 701-238-0451

E-mail: kindermusikwithheidisue@yahoo.com

Home Page: http://heidisue.kindermusik.net

Watch the clock.

2. Limit juices and snacks for at least one hour before meals. Hunger can translate into motivation to eat.

Be sneaky. 3. Add veggies to the spaghetti sauce or hot dish, top cereal with fruit - do whatever works!

Routine, Routine, Routine.

4. Like everything else, our preschoolers like it when things are the same. Serve snacks and meals at about the same time each day.

Be a GOOD example.

5. They’re always watching! If you eat a variety of healthy food, your preschooler is more likely to follow suit.

Know when to get help.

6. If your preschooler is growing and energetic, she is probably fine. Talk to your doctor if your picky eater is compromising her growth and development.

preschooler (3–5 years)

the average child will need to be offered a new food 8-10 times before they will give it a try.

recent survey of ND schools found the average elementary school lunch price was $1.52.

Big kids are beginning to get busy with activities and homework. The days go fast, but we still need to encourage and teach healthy eating habits.

kids (6–9 years)

sit down already!

We’re all busy. Kids and parents alike! Our hectic lifestyles make it increasingly harder to sit down and eat together, but there are real benefits to doing so. Sitting together promotes conversation and communication. Some research has found that kids will make better choices when dining with their family. The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse found that kids who dined with their family five times a week had their risk of smoking, drinking or using drugs cut in half. Makes sense, better communication, talking to your kids and knowing what they are up to is a no brainer in helping them make better choices. So, turn off the TV and cell phones, say your blessing and dig in together!

keep them moving

Our big kids are in school, have homework and are increasingly interested in TV and the computer, which has all the makings of a couch potato. Being physically active builds strength, coordination, confidence and sets the stage for a healthy lifestyle. The National Association for Sports and Physical Education recommends our big kids get one hour or more of moderate and vigorous physical activity on most every day. Now that doesn’t mean your big kid needs to jump on the treadmill. Fifteen minute bouts of activity, sports or anything physical will do the trick. Remember that physical activities can teach your big kid about setting goals, meeting challenges, sportsmanship and teamwork. Our big kids are

sharpening basic physical skills such as jumping, kicking and throwing so keep things in perspective regarding her age and developmental level, natural abilities and interests. There is enough time for your big kid to turn into the next Michael Jordon or Mia Hamm so, relax and let them have fun.

14% of US kids are overweight.

Tweeners are embarking on a time of change. Not just physical changes, but mental and emotional changes as well. They are also beginning to make choices that can shape their health and lifestyle.

tweeners (10–12 years)

a national issue

Obesity is a huge problem in our country that crosses all ages, including our tweeners. Genetics can be a factor, but often too many calories in and too few worked off is the culprit. In the age of fast food, processed everything, working parents, 100 channel TV selection, internet and video games, there is one factor that should also be closely looked at. It’s called the ‘what you see is what you get’ phenomenon. In other words what your tweener sees from you is likely what they will become. So, what are you teaching your kids? What kind of an example are you? Here are some simple obesity fighting steps you can use to help your tweener: Walk the walk.

1. Live the lifestyle you want your kids to live. Get it done as a family.

Don’t be a nag.

2. Nagging your kids about their weight won’t help. It may have the reverse effect causing them to withdraw and become increasingly self-conscious. Be supportive and help them change their habits.

Set limits.

3. Layout guidelines and set times for TV watching, video game and computer usage and snack selection.

Be consistent.

4. Change is hard and sticking to your guns with a crabby tweener can be equally difficult. It’s important to stand behind the rules you set or nothing will change.

Don’t use food as a reward or punishment.

5. Talk about mixed signals! Food is fuel and that is how it should be treated. Get moving together.

6. Make physical activity a family affair. Go for walks, bike rides, build a snow fort – just make it fun!

Practice good eating habits.

7. Get your tweener involved in the kitchen and grocery shopping. Have healthy snacks available and make meal time a family time with no TV. Be patient.

8. It is going to take small steps to make changes and it isn’t going to happen overnight. Remember that you are trying to create habits to last a lifetime.

build those bones

Our tweener daughters are at a critical point in their bone development. Too often they are not getting or doing what is needed to promote strong, healthy bones, which can increase their risk of osteoporosis later in life. The keys for our tweeners include getting at least 1,300 milligrams of calcium, which is equal to about 4 cups of milk, and participating in weight-bearing physical activity every day. Weightbearing activities include any activity where your tweener is moving her body against gravity such as, walking, jogging, playing soccer or basketball.

Dramatic physical changes and constant social pressures can make our teens feel self-conscious and concerned with how they look. These concerns can transition into an obsession that can become an eating disorder.

teens (13–18 years)

not just a girl thing

While eating disorders are more common in girls, they can affect boys as well. Critical ages for development of eating disorders are 14 and 18. Eating disorders involve self-critical, negative thoughts and feelings related to body image and food. As many as 2 out of 100 kids in America will struggle with an eating disorder. An eating disorder is different from just feeling fat when you aren’t. It is a devastating illness in which your teen becomes so preoccupied with their weight and body image, they jeopardize their health. It is important to know the warning signs:

• preoccupation with eating, food, and

becoming very thin, frail, or emaciated

• weight control weighs herself or himself repeatedly

• rigid food rituals – having to cut food many

• times before eating, moving food around the plate

• or avoiding dietary fats

calorie counting, eating only low-fat foods and/

• or “vegan”

•

•

•

sudden interest in becoming a “vegetarian”

exercising excessively, hiding exercise, and/or

showing guilt when exercise is missed

withdrawing from social activities, especially

meals and celebrations involving food depressed, lethargic (lacking in energy)

multiple medical complaints – troubles with

• bowels, heartburn, frequent stomach aches, missing periods, feeling cold all the time, night sweats, difficulty sleeping

bathroom visits immediately after meals

• regularly buying diet pills, laxatives, diuretics,

• or enemas

• dressing in layers

interest in fad diets and wanting to participate

•

REMEMBER: An eating disorder sufferer DOES NOT need to appear underweight or even ‘normal’ weight. Many appear NOT to be underweight... it does not mean they suffer less or are in any less danger.

fm help

If you suspect an eating disorder, it is important to intervene and there is help right here in Fargo-Moorhead. The Eating Disorders Institute offers treatment on an outpatient basis, or if needed they also offer both partial hospital and full inpatient treatment. You can visit them online for helpful information, www.meritcare.com/specialties/mental/eating/, or call 701.234.4111 or 800.437.4010 (ext. 4111) to learn more about their programs or to schedule an evaluation or consultation.

sources: www.feeding.com, www.mayoclinic.com, www.theparentreport.com, www.kidshealth.org, www.babycenter.com, www.family.go.com, www.dpi.state.nd.us, www.meritcare.com

75% of anorexics do not have a history of being overweight.

sally says

She is our quintessential, “do-it-all” mom and friend who reminds us to remember the woman behind the mom.

ahh, friendship!

story by | jodie harvala

It is so fun to watch young kids with a new friend. The excitement in their voice as they proclaim, ‘Hey that’s my friend, Molly!” is priceless. And the ease in which they make a new friend is enviable. If only we all had the confidence to just walk up to another person and ask, “wanna be my friend?” The excitement of friendship doesn’t end with childhood. It evolves through the years.

Adolescence marks the transitions of friendship moving to the top of the priority list. All of a sudden our family is embarrassing and annoying and our friends are by far the most important part of our life. Appearance, behavior and actions are all driven by what our friends will think and what will impress them. Recently, I joined Facebook along with many of my high school classmates. We have all become ‘friends’ and I can’t help but wonder, if we were back in high school, would we all connect like this?

Through the years our friends fall into different categories:

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those we have literally known forever

those we met after leaving home and before kids

those we met because of our kids

those that entered our life out of nowhere

the thing that makes the world go ‘round.

Who is Sally?

Our different friends are familiar with the life events that make you, you. Some know all the crazy stuff you did, the boys you kissed, the nights you skinny dipped or the shy girl you were in high school before you found your voice! Some know how sad you were after your first broken heart or how excited you were when you met your husband. Some were the second person you told you were pregnant (gotta tell daddy first) or the first person you needed to talk to when you lost a parent. And only a few know anything about that high school crush you pray joins Facebook so you can see what he looks like now!

It’s inevitable that friendships evolve and change throughout our life. As we grow up, we still want to be cool and we worry what others will think. I don’t know if we ever out grow that, but now we care more about real friendship and we understand we have the power to choose our friends. Your real friends don’t care what car you drive, which house you live in or what you do for a living. They simply just care about

your happiness and that of your family. They are just there any and every time you need help, a smile, a shoulder to cry on, an ear just to listen or a swift kick in the rear to tell you the truth you really don’t want to hear.

Busy. Everyone is busy and there never seems to be enough time in the day, but do yourself a favor… schedule your friends in. Make it a priority! Friendship is something to be cherished, celebrated and cultivated! If you find yourself missing your friends, do something about it! Plan a night out together and for that friend you think about often, but haven’t kept in touch with, pick up the phone.

True friendship is something to hold on to. A friend is someone that holds you in a space of love and sees the best of you even when you can’t see it yourself. They have a part of your heart. So now is the time—the time to invest a little more in your friendships and laugh and love each other. After all, “every girl needs a good friend and a glass of wine.”

Brenda Jacobson, Jennifer Arends, JoAnne Borg, Natalie Johnson and Tammy Askew

photography by | rialee photography

The aspects of life that are most important to us are hidden because of their simplicity and familiarity

—Ludwig Wittgenstein

Busy day Quick answers

Between work, carpooling and dinner, you probably run into questions. Find quick answers on meritcare.com. Choose a pediatrician, search through our health library, look up wait times at the Children’s Walk-In Clinic or find a fitness class that meets your busy schedule. your answers are on meritcare.com.