Wednesday, March 4th, 2020
themedium.submissions@gmail.com
"YEAH....I'M THINKING I'M BACK!"-The Bill and Ted guy
Fuck Tom Holland little bitch ass
My Favorite Comic Book Characters and Why
By Barry Gompers 1) Superman: He is super strong and everyone loves him and I find that relatable. 2) Fantomex: He's an assassin who pretends to be French and I also find that relatable. 3) Dog-Welder: He welds dead dogs to the faces of criminals (This is not a joke, this is a real DC Comics character). 4) Nick Fury (the white one): Look, I'm not racist. I just think the white Nick Fury was a better developed character than the Sam Jackson one. 5) Nick Fury (the black one): I gotta admit this one's also pretty cool. Are you proficient in irony? racism? Pitch Meetings: Livi Student Center Boardroom 7:40-8:45 Production: Livi Student Center Rm 117D Craigslist for perverts
I lost a spoon on a bus. It’s just a regular spoon. No biggie. I just need that spoon. I just REALLY NEED THAT SPOON. It’s silver and a little bent and it’s got some burn marks as if it’s had direct exposure to a flame. It’s my only spoon and how am I gonna eat soup and stuff now, you know? I GOTTA FIND THAT SPOON, MAN. If you find it, you can reach me at crackluver4@gmail.com.
If you're anything like me, then you're a fucking idiot who doesn't know how to read. I'm so bad at reading I can't even discern what I'm currently writing. I forget where I was going with this...oh well. If you'd like to continue this conversation, please contact me at Bimboslice@gmail.com
Hi-ku
I hate writing these I think Haikus are stupid Life is suffering
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the Medium
No I don't know when the next Nintendo Direct is
The Top 8 Things I Learned From Working at GameStop By: Henry Cooldown 8) That copy of Breath of the Wild you just bought? I guarantee you someone shoved that up their ass (No, it was not me). 7) White people who don't speak English are the worst customers. You will learn to become incredibley racist to them. 6) People will ask you if a store called GAMEstop sells DVDs in the year 2020. 5) Getting paid minimum wage to confidently lie to someone about a game you never played is actually pretty fun. 4) You will be called at least once a week by someone asking if you have a copy of NBA Live. This will be the same person every week, and he will never actually pick up a copy. 3) There is no greater joy in life than telling a middle-aged white woman that their copy of Just Dance 2014 is worth less than 1 dollar. 2) No matter how hard you keep vaccuming the carpet, it will never be clean. 1) Every month you'll ask yourself why you haven't been fired yet.
