Nakamura, Ryosuke

Two Different Modes of My Brain

I guess my brain is a little bit weird to you. My brain has two modes: Positive mode, and Negative mode. Each mode, my brain is full of various things.

First, in Positive mode. The biggest part of my brain is Friends. I love to do something helpful for someone. Everyone makes me love myself, and my heart wealthy.

My biggest hobby is tennis. I belong to the tennis club of my university and usually think about what I want to do in next practicing. And I often think about the other hobbies, especially music. I used to play the piano for about 5 years, so I’m very interested in music. Listening to English music is also good for studying English. Every time it’s joy to think about what I love to do.

There are three parts that I always think about: Staying Alive, my Future, and Things Around Me. “Everything is gonna be fine if you’re alive.” is my motto. So it’s very important for me to stay alive and healthy. These three occupies the same parts of Negative mode of my brain.

Then, how about Negative mode? Things I have to do occupy most parts of my brain, Studying, Part-Time job, Family or Housework. When so many things I have to do comes in short time, sometimes I want to run away from everything, go out from this cruel world. But Staying Alive is the most important thing for me. Staying alive with loving and being loved is our destiny. Then my friends help me a lot. So I’m living for my friends, family, but for me.

The title of this Zine is “Two Different Modes of My Brain”, but these two modes are connected. My mom always tells me not to think too much. But this is me. This is what I want to be like. I’m sure it’s one of the toughest moments in my life. I’m afraid of my future so much. Making this Zine organized my thought clearly, so It was a great opportunity for me to face my future and not to run away. I hope some day I will read this zine again, and look back on this moment.

Nakamura, Ryosuke