Crazy
THE MOMENT I KNEW
I knew I had trust issues
‘SARAH’ IS NOT HER REAL NAME. WORDS: EMMA ROSSITER, HANNAH CROCKER. PHOTOS: GETTY, MEDAVIA
U
nlocking my phone, I saw a string of ‘Happy birthday’ messages appear on screen. Some from family, others from friends who’d tagged me in cringeworthy photos. It was April 2016, my 30th birthday. Among the messages was one from Gary, 31. A friend of a friend, he’d added me on Facebook a few days before. ‘I was in the year above you at school,’ he reminded me now. I didn’t remember him, but he looked handsome, had a kind face, so I was happy to chat. He asked me what I was up to, if I was doing anything nice to celebrate. Gradually, texting turned into calling and then into video chatting. We could talk about everything and had no awkward silences. I’d get excited whenever his name flashed up on my screen. Then, just a few weeks after that initial message, we met up for the first time
24
inlove
Was I losing it or was my fella lying? Claire Lowe, 33, Chesterfield
and very quickly became thought of losing him. an item. I apologised, begged him For a while, things were for forgiveness. good between us. I’d had bad relationships Only, Gary was always on in the past, knew I had his phone. trust issues. ‘Who are you texting I didn’t want my past now?’ I moaned to damage my as we ate dinner. future with ‘It’s just Gary, so I tried Sarah,’ he to tell myself I explained. was imagining Sarah was these things. someone he’d Only, a few known for years. months later, I shouldn’t things were be jealousÉ no better. Only, I felt like Gary was I’d make snippy remarks constantly texting Sarah. about Gary’s constant I felt suspicious, insecure. texting, ask him questions Eventually, after all the time, relentlessly. a few months of dating, Then, one day, he had Gary snapped. a suggestion. ‘If you don’t start trusting ‘Why don’t you see a me, you’re going to lose counsellor?’ he said. me,’ he warned, annoyed, ‘I’m not when I questioned him yet again. My heart thumped hard in my chest. By now, I loved Gary more than anything. Couldn’t Suddenly, I got a bear the stream of messages
I’d make snippy remarks about his texting
crazy!’ I frowned. But Gary said he was just looking out for me, had my best interests at heart. So, I agreed to make an appointment to see my doctor. As soon as I told Gary, he was thrilled. ‘This is going to be so good for you,’ he smiled. Then he reminded me that he was away the following week with his family and friends. Sarah would be there… ‘I’ll be staying at my dad’s,’ Gary reassured. Before he left, we hugged goodbye. ‘I love you, and I only want to be with you,’ he smiled. Any worries I had faded away. But we barely spoke that week. In fact I only called him once, not wanting to bother him, and even then only when I’d seen something on telly we’d
