Spring 2009 On the Minds of Moms

When

We are grateful for our 120 year history with this wonderful community. We value the relationships we have with our clients and fellow businesses.

A “top-of-mind” item for moms and dads is the availability of quality childcare options. Our children come first, and when that priority is secured, we all benefit.

We are especially pleased to be part of the coalition of local businesses whose support is making a new infant center in Fargo a reality.

“It is exciting to create this, and it offers another dimension of vitality to our great community.”

-Rich Slagle, CEO and President

The most complete and accurate Yellow Pages!

on the minds of moms

www.onthemindsofmoms.com

PUBLISHER DS Communication, LLC

EDITOR Managing Editor

Dani Parkos Fluge

COPY EDITOR Karina Hodny

MARKETING AND SALES Director

Sheri Kleinsasser Stockmoe

PHOTOGRAPHY Ria Czichotzki – Rialee Photography Scott Thuen – Thuen Design

DESIGN AND LAYOUT Scott Thuen – Thuen Design

AD DESIGN Lindsay Arneson

Janelle Kistner

Tara Kessler Scott Thuen

PRINTING Richtman’s Printing

EDITORAL CONTACT e-mail: info@onthemindsofmoms.com

ONTHEMINDSOFMOMS.COM MANAGING CO-EDITORS

Dani Parkos Fluge and Sheri Kleinsasser Stockmoe

INFORMATION mail: PO Box 190, Fargo, ND 58107

ADVERTISING OPPORTUNITIES phone: 701.306.1624

e-mail: advertise@onthemindsofmoms.com

SUBSCRIPTION e-mail: info@onthemindsofmoms.com or visit: www.onthemindsofmoms.com

CONTRIBUTE CONTENT If you have an interest in contributing to OTMOM, please contact us at info@onthemindsofmoms.com

COVER PHOTO BY Rialee Photography www.rialeephotography.com

OTMOM MISSION STATEMENT

On The Minds Of Moms is dedicated to providing a community of local support and real-life advice for the modern day mom who is on the go and needs to know. We are inspired to help the woman behind “the mom” balance it all by offering support, validation and reassurance she is a good mom wanting only the best for herself and family.

On The Minds Of Moms is a quarterly magazine written by, for and about local moms in the greater Fargo-Moorhead area. On The Minds Of Moms strives to achieve a balance between useful information and entertaining content. Written to serve as the local reading alternative to family magazines that are produced for a larger regional/national audience.

On The Minds Of Moms contains views from across the parenting spectrum. These views do not necessarily reflect those of the publisher. All activities listed in these pages are at your own risk and require appropriate supervision.

the mom message

How many times have we as women said “oh that would never happen to me”. But what would you do, how would you react when faced with unsettling circumstances you never thought you would find yourself in? This Spring Issue introduces you to a mom who found herself in such a situation. Power and strength aren’t words you use to physically describe feature mom, Angela Smith. Anything but ordinary, this 5 foot 100 pound woman discovered just how strong she really was years ago when she left a man whose only intention was to make her feel powerless. This Mrs. North Dakota International found strength in writing and through her platform began speaking out about her past in the hope of letting other woman know abuse and violence can happen to anyone. Angela, thank you for your silent confidence, brave soul and sharing your story with us.

This Issue also includes a new section called what’s on your mind. We have had an overwhelming response from area moms interested in writing for OTMOM and sharing their perspective on being a mom. It only made sense to create an area where we could share this stuff with everyone. Funny, serious, it’s simply what’s on your mind and you can submit it for consideration at info@onthemindsofmoms.com. Finally, after a near sell out of the MOM shirt we are introducing a new style along with a hip new line for the kiddos. Be sure to check it out at the OTMOM Store online, www.onthemindsofmoms.com.

Founders

A Mom In Motion…

Keeping her word and focus, Kathleen Wrigley, our first featured mom announced to us back in July ‘08 she was training for a marathon in January. Just ten months following the birth of baby Harper, and in Kathleen fashion she out did herself by running the Goofy’s Race and a Half Challenge at the Walt Disney 2009 Marathon. That’s right she completed a half marathon and then turned around and ran a full marathon the next day. We think she might be a little “Goofy”, but we’re proud of her. Congrats Lady!

Dani and Sheri

& Inspired Moms

A UND graduate, Karina is a mostly stay-at-home mom to Camryn, Lauren and Max. To escape from the realities of life with 3 kids, a husband and a dog, she works part time for Rialee Photography. Karina enjoys reading, writing, running, visiting with friends and longs for a date night with her husband, Darren.

A Fargo native and founder of Catalyst Medical Center, Dr. Mathison cares for patients, specializing in Otolaryngology and head/neck surgery, with a focus on facial plastic surgery and skincare. While her busy private practice is a prime focus, she enjoys spending time with her beautiful baby boy, Grant, husband Steve, six siblings, parents and long-time friends. Dr. Mathison is an avid gardener and occasional golfer.

lisa montgomery writer | fargo

This creative writing major and mother of 3 boys works part-time for a greeting card company, and full time at home. She spends her winters in hockey arenas and Suburban’s, and summers are split between the baseball park, and the lake cabin. When she’s not at sporting events or emptying the dishwasher, Lisa enjoys spending quality time with her husband, Mike, reading, and squeezing in some girlfriend time as well.

A native of Minnesota, Dr. Van Dam is a chiropractor and certified acupuncturist who has been treating conditions of the nerves, muscles and joints for 11 years. He enjoys helping to improve the health and quality of life of his patients, particularly children. Dr. Van Dam and wife Shyrlee have three young children. He is involved in church activities, FM Rotary and enjoys riding motorcycle, playing golf, and basketball.

Founder of Crossroads

Consulting, Jodie has a true passion for helping others identify and discover their passion for life and desires in career. No stranger to searching for her own true path, Jodie has worked in radio advertising, as a career placement recruiter and most recently opened her own businesses. Jodie and husband Eli are proud parents to Foster (6) and Keaton (2).

Originator of

Photography, this once child care professional, wife, and mom of four has been able to turn her hobby of artistic style, with her combined passion for children and photography, into a very successful career. Modern and fresh, Ria photographs with 100% natural light on location as well as in her new natural light loft studio in downtown Fargo.

tisor

An educator for 27 years with the last 18 years as an Elementary School Counselor for Fargo Public Schools, Nancy has spent her entire working career focused on children. Nancy loves spending time with her 27 year old daughter, Jessica, who also lives in Fargo. She enjoys being an adjunct instructor for MSUM, flower gardening, and reading on her screened in porch in the summer.

karina hodny writer | moorhead

jodie harvala writer | fargo

dr. susan mathison writer | fargo

ria czichotzki photographer | moorhead

Rialee

dr. scott van dam writer | fargo

nancy

writer | fargo

mod mom

liz mathison

age 41 fargo

stay-at home-mom

married mom of 2 year old son and 9 and 5 year old daughters

my favorite “girls get-together” that keeps me sane…

A friend of mine hosted a girls weekend at her lake home a couple of summers ago to celebrate the birthdays of myself and another friend. We spent two fun days/nights together (about 15 girls). We talked, laughed, danced, went boating, and had a great time. We did it again this past summer. These times together just made us all closer and allowed everyone to get away from their everyday life and let loose.

the biggest challenge of being a stay-at-home mom…

I am so blessed to be able to stay home with my kids, but I feel I don’t have the patience I used to have when I was younger. When I was working I didn’t get as much time with my daughter so I had all kinds of patience, but now, being with them all day I find I lose my patience faster.

time with my husband is usually spent…

Together with the kids. It seems the weeks just flow from one to the next with the busyness of our lives and we neglect to spend time with just us. We try to have “date nights” and time out with friends and we usually go on one vacation together every year.

photography by | rialee photography

our favorite family activity…

We love spending our weekends at the lake in the summer boating, swimming, fishing and being with our extended families. We also love playing Wii together.

my biggest splurge or guilty pleasure…

The skin care products I use. With all of the sun damage and being over 40, the investment in good skin care is worth it to me.

something that gets me through the day...

I love getting up earlier than everyone else to have my coffee, read the paper and think about the day ahead. If there are hectic mornings when I am not able to do those things I feel a little less ready to face the day.

i can’t live without my…

Family and friends. I am so blessed to have a great husband and three awesome kids and I am close to both my family and my husband’s family. They are a constant source of love and support for me. I am also very lucky to have really great friends. Some of whom I have been friends with since childhood and throughout school, and some I have met through other people. I believe that good friends are essential to a healthy life. They are a safe place to be yourself, to be accepted and loved and I know I could not live without them.

one mom tip I would like to share with other moms…

I am usually the one asking other moms for tips and advice! I have a stash of supplies in the middle console of my car that have come in really handy. I usually have a diaper, some wipes, a pair of children’s socks, crackers, gum, some suckers, a couple of crayons and some coins. No one can see my stash, but I know it’s there!

the movie I could watch over and over again… Is When Harry Met Sally. To this day, some of my family and friends will call me Sally when we’re at a restaurant because of the way I order my food (everything on the side). I love romantic comedies.

one thing I long to do again someday…

Is to travel to another country. In my late twenties I traveled to Thialand with my sister. The experience of going to a country so far away, learning about a different culture and meeting the people really opened up my mind and my heart. It made me want to travel a lot more…someday!

rad dad

andy nelson

age 35

fargo marketing manager married dad of 14 month old daughter

when i look at my daughter i see…

All the good things that make life so precious. Her life is all about expressing herself and learning new things every minute of every day. The wonder and joy in her world is something I hope is always there for her, the purest of joy.

to me being a first time dad means…

Experiencing so many firsts. It’s almost like being a kid again myself. Finally the little things make you smile again, just as you know they did when you were her age. You stop and watch the world through her eyes and try to understand what in the world she is thinking right now!

photography by | rialee photography

the parenting trick i have mastered…

My daughter, Emily, just loves music with any significant beat, so whispering one of her favorite songs in her ear will bring her out of any mood or calm her from the recent traumatic experience. Her little legs kick, she starts to dance in your arms and then like magic the smile and giggling begins!

i admire my wife’s ability to…

Focus on family time and not allow all the other distraction of life to take over. Lisa has always been able to balance the distractions better than myself. She reminds me to “stop with all the projects” and spend quality time together as a family. A standard quote from Lisa would be: “There will always be another project, but there will never be another today.”

one quality i hope my daughter gets from her mom…

Her looks, of course, and patience. Lisa has the ability to not get stressed by life and the things it can throw your way on a daily basis. She takes it as it comes and works through it very systematically to sort out the big from the little stuff.

i can’t wait to teach my daughter…

How to swim. She loves bath time and splashing in the water and I hope she will always have this same enthusiasm for water, as we spend our summers at the lake.

being a dad has made me a better person in the way i…

Have become a better listener along with being more content to just sit back and take in all the precious moments.

the one TV show i can’t miss…

Is Brothers and Sisters. The dynamic of family has always been something of interest to me. I come from a family of eight and there was always activity in our home growing up. I could have never imagined growing up without siblings, they have all helped to shape who I am today.

he biggest adjustment i never anticipated since becoming a dad…

Being asleep by 10:00 pm on most nights. Emily starts her days early regardless of what time we go to bed, so a few short nights teach you to sleep when she sleeps. Although a few years of short nights is a small price to pay for a life filled with smiles and giggles from your precious little girl!

february events

1

Teen Open Studio

701-232-3821

www.plainsart.org

During the first Sundays of February, March and April kids ages 13 to 18 interested in the arts are encouraged to come hang out with provocative local artists from 2:00pm - 4:30pm and work on their creative skills while learning about everything from painting to tattoo art. Cost: $52 nonmembers / $47 members. Call or register online.

3

Park Christian School

Kindergarten Round-up

218-236-0500

www.parkchristianschool.org

It’s that time already. From 2:00pm - 3:00pm or 6:00pm - 7:00pm get your little one registered to start school. Call Teresa Nickel to reserve your spot.

7

Frosty Flicks

701-461-8902

www.marcustheatres.com

Family films at the West Acres 14 Theatre starting at 10:00am. Cost: $2.50 per seat and you get popcorn!

8

America the Beautiful Documentary

701-234-4111

www.fargotheatre.org

Does America have an unhealthy obsession with beauty? Journey into the psyche of celebrities, citizens, athletes and industry professionals to determine the roots of this superficial obsession. Don’t miss a viewing of the movie and a community Q&A forum at 6:00pm at the Fargo Theater. FREE!

8 Destination Anchor Island

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Enjoy a Saturday afternoon at the Caribbean with music, water games, treats and prizes. Fargo South indoor pool from 1:00pm - 5:00pm. Cost: $2.00.

8 Family Winter-ific Day

701-241-1353

www.fargoparks.com

Events for the entire family including free Clydesdale sleigh rides, crosscountry ski rentals and downhill sledding from 1:00pm - 4:00pm at Edgewood Chalet.

9 Healthy Heart Events

701-281-0126

www.ymcacassclay.org

Stop in for an XerGame and learn about ways to keep your heart healthy during national heart month. Snack and activites for families to participate together. Schlossman Branch from 4:30pm - 7:00pm. FREE.

10

Fargo Swings

701-306-9681

www.fargoswings.com

Date Night? How about kicking up your heels with your honey? Every Tuesday night at the Avalon from 8:30pm - 9:30pm learn East Coast Swing, Lindy Hop, Shim Sham and from 9:30pm -10:30pm cut loose with free dance. Cost: Adults $7.00 Students $5.00.

11

One Hump or Two at the Red River Zoo

701-277-9240

www.redriverzoo.org

Did you know there are two types of camels? Come visit the camels at the Red River Zoo to find out more. Discover why they have humps and why they are so well adapted to North Dakota weather! Starts at 9:30am for kids ages 4-6 years. Cost: $10 for members or $15 for non-members.

12

Love & Logic Parenting Course

701-293-9622

www.ymcacassclay.org

A common sense approach to teaching parenting skills that cultivate confidence and good decision making in children. Learn more on Thursday evenings from 6:00pm - 7:30pm at the Downtown YMCA. Childcare available during class if pre-registered. Cost: $25 members $35 non-members.

12

Healthy Heart Events

701-293-9622

www.ymcacassclay.org

Stop in for an XerGame and learn about ways to keep your heart healthy during national heart month. Snack and activites for families to participate together. Downtown Branch from 4:30pm - 7:00pm. FREE.

14

Frosty Flicks

701-461-8902

www.marcustheatres.com

Family films at the West Acres 14 Theatre starting at 10:00am. Cost: $2.50 per seat and you get popcorn!

14

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Chocolate, flowers & your sweetie. Good times!

14

Ronald McDonald Sweetheart Ball

701-232-3980

www.rmhcfargo.org

Annual event that raises funds for the benefit of the Ronald McDonald house and provides a fabulous evening of dinner, dancing, live & silent auctions and lots of fun! For event information call Joyce at RMD house.

16 President’s Day! NO SCHOOL!

17

Oak Grove Admissions Open House

701-373-7114

www.oakgrovelutheran.com

Oak Grove Lutheran School’s Open Houses are information sessions about Oak Grove. Families learn details about academics, campus ministry, unique programs, student life and extracurricular activities. Participants have an opportunity to meet administrators, teachers and staff, as well as hear current parents and students share their Oak Grove experience. Find out more about Pre-K through Grade 5 from 7:00pm - 8:00pm at 2720 32nd Avenue South in Fargo.

19

Car Seat Safety Check

701-234-5570

www.fmambulance.com

Are your car seats installed correctly?

Don’t take the chance! Make an appointment between 1:30pm - 5:30pm at FM Ambulance.

19

One Hump or Two at the Red River Zoo

701-277-9240

www.redriverzoo.org

Did you know there are two types of camels? Come visit the camels at the Red Rive Zoo to find out more. Discover why they have humps and why they are so well adapted to North Dakota weather! Starts at 2:00pm for kids ages 4-6 years. Cost: $10 for members or $15 for non-members.

19

Love & Logic Parenting Course

701-293-9622

www.ymcacassclay.org

A common sense approach to teach-

ing parenting skills that cultivate confidence and good decision making in children. Learn more on Thursday evenings from 6:00pm - 7:30pm at the Downtown YMCA. Childcare available during class if pre-registered. Cost: $25 members $35 non-members.

19-21

Cares for Kids Radiothon

A three-day radiothon, sponsored by Radio Fargo-Moorhead, is broadcast live on FM radio stations Y94 (93.7 FM) and Bob 95 (95.1 FM), and Mojo (104.7 FM). Patients and families share their personal stories about how Children’s Hospital has made a difference in their lives. Saturday’s radiothon will be broadcast live from West Acres Shopping Center in Fargo. Stop by and make a donation.

20

Home School Open House

701-281-0126

www.ymcacassclay.org

Come participate in a wide variety of activites geared towards youth ages 6-18 years. Wear comfrotable clothes and tennis shoes to the Schlossman Branch from 1:30pm - 3:00pm. FREE.

21

Awesome Art Afternoon

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Children ages 4-8 will be able to create a variety of art projects to take home. From 1:00pm - 3:00pm at the Robert D. Johnson Rec Center.

21

Frosty Flicks

701-461-8902

www.marcustheatres.com

Family films at the West Acres 14 Theatre starting at 10:00am. Cost: $2.50 per seat and you get popcorn!

21

Teen Pool Party

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Don’t miss the biggest party of the year! With today’s hottest hits, cool games and free food how can you go wrong? From 6:30pm - 9:00pm at the Fargo South indoor pool.

21-22

Clay for Two

701-232-3821

www.plainsart.org

Make a mess with clay as you create art with a loved one or a child.Two adults or one adult plus one child ages 5 - 12 are welcome to explore their creativity from 1:00pm - 4:00pm at the Plains Art

Museum. Cost: $38 for members or $42 for nonmembers (plus $28 supply fee). Call or register online.

22-28

Eating Disorders Awareness

Week

701-234-4111

www.meritcare.com

Each year millions of Americans develop serious eating disorders, and one in ten die from complications related to their condition. Contact Jeana at the Eating Disorders Institute to learn more about activities planned in the FM-area to raise awareness of this important issue.

23-26

Fargo Public Schools Kindergarden Registration

701-446-1043

www.fargo.k12.nd.us

From 7:30am - 4:00pm at the school you child is to attend, bring your child’s certified birth certifiate, current immunization record and to verify the correct neighborhood school, a current utility

bill with your name and address on it. If you do not know which school your child will attend please call.

23

Car Seat Safety Check

701-234-5570

Are your car seats installed correctly?

Don’t take the chance! Make an appointment between 1:30pm - 5:30pm at Luther Family Buick Pontiac GMC.

24

National Pancake Day at IHOP

701-282-6538

www.meritcare.com

International House of Pancakes across the country, will be offering free short stacks of pancakes in exchange for a donation to the Children’s Miracle Network. All money raised at our local IHOP will go to MeritCare Children’s Hospital.

26

Park Christian School New Student Visitation Day

218-236-0500

www.parkchristianschool.org

See what Park Christian School has to offer. Please call Teresa Nickel to reserve your spot.

26

Love & Logic Parenting Course

701-293-9622

www.ymcacassclay.org

A common sense approach to teaching parenting skills that cultivate confidence and good decision making in children. Learn more on Thursday evenings from 6:00pm - 7:30pm at the Downtown YMCA. Childcare available during class if pre-registered. Cost: $25 members $35 non-members.

27

Oak Grove Elementry School

Buddy Day

701-373-7114

www.oakgrovelutheran.com

Oak Grove Buddy Days are held during the school year and provide an excel-

lent opportunity for students to learn more about Oak Grove. Seeing the campus for yourself – attending classes, experiencing chapel, meeting students and teachers will give you a good idea of what the school has to offer. Call in advance to register.

28

Youth Ice Fishing Derby

701-241-1353

www.fargoparks.com

Learn about ice fishing and compete in a derby to win prizes. From 12:00pm - 2:30pm at South Woodhaven Pond.

28

Frosty Flicks

701-461-8902

www.marcustheatres.com

Family films at the West Acres 14 Theatre starting at 10:00am. Cost: $2.50 per seat and you get popcorn!

march events

2 American Gold Gymnastics Spring Session Registration Begins

701-280-0400

www.americangoldgymnastics.com

Registration starts for the American Gold Gymnastics Spring Session. Programs for kids 18 months to 18 years.

3 Fargo Swings

701-306-9681

www.fargoswings.com

Date Night? How about kicking up your heels with your honey? Every Tuesday night at the Avalon from 8:30pm - 9:30pm learn East Coast Swing, Lindy Hop, Shim Sham and from 9:30pm - 10:30pm cut loose with free dance. Cost: Adults $7.00 Students $5.00.

5 Love & Logic Parenting Course

701-293-9622

www.ymcacassclay.org

A common sense approach to teaching parenting skills that cultivate confidence and good decision making in children. Learn more on Thursday evenings from 6:00pm - 7:30pm at the Downtown YMCA. Childcare available during class if pre-registered. Cost: $25 members $35 non-members.

5-8

Oak Grove Presents Les Misérables

701-373-7114

www.oakgrovelutheran.com

Oak Grove Lutheran School’s amateur production of Les Misérables in the Scheels Center for the Performing Arts, 124 North Terrace in Fargo, at 7:30pm Tickets cost $5 for students and $10 for adults.

6

Home School Open House

701-293-9622

www.ymcacassclay.org

Come participate in a wide variety of activates geared towards youth ages 6-18 years. Wear comfortable clothes and bring along a swimming suit to the Downtown location from 1:30pm - 3:00pm. FREE.

6

12

14 & 21

Visit with “Clifford” the Big Red Dog

701-241-1496

www.fargolibrary.org

Enjoy story time and visit with “Clifford the Big Red Dog” from 2:00pm - 2:30pm in the community room at the Dr. James Carlson Library. Featuring books and stories about Clifford and his pals, participants can even meet “Clifford” at the end of the program! Geared for kids age 6 and under. For more information, call the children’s librarian.

7

Frosty Flicks

701-461-8902

www.marcustheatres.com

Family films at the West Acres 14 Theatre starting at 10:00am. Cost: $2.50 per seat and you get popcorn!

8

Daylight Savings Begins

Don’t forget to spring ahead! Turn those clocks ahead.

11

Here Kitty-Kitty at the Red River Zoo

701-277-9240

www.redriverzoo.org

Come meet our Pallas’ cat. They are small, but they are pretty cool cats! Find out how they are related to tigers and how they are related to the cars we call pets. Starts at 9:30am for kids ages 4-6 years. Cost: $10 for members or $15 for non-members.

12

Love & Logic Parenting Course

701-293-9622

www.ymcacassclay.org

A common sense approach to teaching parenting skills that cultivate confidence and good decision making in children. Learn more on Thursday evenings from 6:00pm - 7:30pm at the Downtown YMCA. Childcare available during class if pre-registered. Cost: $25 members $35 non-members.

Park Christian School New Student Visitation Day

218-236-0500

www.parkchristianschool.org

See what Park Christian School has to offer. Please call Teresa Nickel to reserve your spot.

13

Oak Grove Elementary School

Buddy Day

701-373-7114

www.oakgrovelutheran.com

Buddy Days are held during the school year and provide an excellent opportunity for students to learn more about Oak Grove. Seeing the campus for yourself – attending classes, experiencing chapel, meeting students and teachers will give you a good idea of what the school has to offer. Call in advance to register.

14

Celtic Festival

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Celebrate the culture of the seven Celtic Nations featuring intriguing history, arts and traditions of Brittany, Cornwall, Isle of Man, Galicia, Ireland, Scotland and Wales. From 10:00am - 4:00pm at the Hjemkomst Center.

14

Kids Book Club: “Frindle”

701-241-1496

www.fargolibrary.org

Join the kids book club and enjoy great stories with new friends. Kids Book Club meets the second Saturday of every month from 1:00pm - 2:00pm from September through June. For kids in grades 4 through 6. Space is limited. Call for more details.

14

Frosty Flicks

701-461-8902

www.marcustheatres.com

Family films at the West Acres 14 Theatre starting at 10:00am. Cost: $2.50 per seat and you get popcorn!

Watercolor for Two

701-232-3821

www.plainsart.org

Learn how to paint with watercolors. Available for two adults or an adult with a child ages 5 and up. From 1:00pm - 3:00pm at the Plains Art Museum. Cost $25 for members or $28 for nonmembers (plus $10 supply fee). Call or register online.

15

Eagles

701-241-9100

www.fargodome.com

Get your groove on with the legendary Eagles. Show starts at 8:00pm at the Fargodome. Cost: $69 and up.

17-18

Moorhead Library Preschool

Storytime

218-233-7594

www.larl.org

Story time on Tuesday at 6:30pm and Wednesday at 10:30am. Reading topic: Counting - I Can Count.

19

Here Kitty-Kitty: Red River Zoo

701-277-9240

www.redriverzoo.org

Come meet our Pallas’ cat. They are small, but they are pretty cool cats! Find out how they are related to tigers and how they are related to the cars we call pets. Starts at 2:00pm for kids ages 4-6 years. Cost: $10 for members or $15 for non-members.

19

Car Seat Safety Check

701-234-5570

www.fmambulance.com

Are your car seats installed correctly? Don’t take the chance! Make an appointment between 1:30pm - 5:30pm at FM Ambulance.

All

event listings displayed within OTMOM are carefully selected to provide diverse options for families. It is always a good idea to call ahead to confirm the information provided. Although it is not possible to list every event happening in the FM area it is encouraged organizations submit events for consideration to info@onthemindsofmoms.com

21

Awesome Art Afternoon

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Come and spend an afternoon creating fun and exciting art projects. Children will be able to create a variety of art projects to take home. From 1:00pm - 3:00pm at the Robert D. Johnson Rec Center.

23

Car Seat Safety Check

701-234-5570

Are your car seats installed correctly?

Don’t take the chance! Make an appointment between 1:30pm - 5:30pm at Luther Family Buick Pontiac GMC.

24

Oak Grove High and Middle School Open House

701-373-7114

www.oakgrovelutheran.com

Open Houses are information sessions about Oak Grove. Families learn details about academics, campus ministry, unique programs, student life and extracurricular activities. Participants have an opportunity to meet administrators, teachers and staff, as well as hear current parents and students share their experience. Find out more about Grades 6-12 from 7:00pm - 8:00pm at Oak Grove North Campus

26

Teen Movie Night “Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2”

701-476-5978

www.fargolibrary.org

Teen movie night is every 4th Thursday of the month from 4:30pm - 6:30pm in the Community Room the Dr. James Carlson Library. Call the teen librarian for more details.

27-28

North Dakota International Pageant

701-232-3196

www.ndpageants.com

Come see OTMOM feature mom, Angela Smith as she passes on her crown and title at the Fargo South High School Theater. For more information contact Kathy to be a part of this fantastic event.

27-28

PRCA Rodeo

701-241-9100

www.fargodome.com

Giddy-Up! The Rodeo is back in town! Fargodome doors open at 6:30pm. Ticket prices range from $6.00 - $25.00.

28

Parents’ Fair

701-234-6169

www.merticare.com

Discover what thousands of others already have. Mark your calendars and join MeritCare for one of the regions most valued events geared towards raising healthy kids. Fargo Civic Center doors are open from 8:00am - 4:30pm. Free and open to the public.

28

Teddy Bear Tea Party

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Bring your teddy bear for games, etiquette and dress-up at Rheault Farm. Ages 3-5 from 1:00pm - 2:00pm and ages 6-8 from 3:00pm - 4:00pm. Registration required.

april events

Child Abuse Prevention Month

www.stopchildabusend.com

www.pcamn.org

Help strengthen families and prevent child abuse and neglect.

1 April Fools’ Day!

Don’t fool around join OTMOM at www.OnTheMindsOfMoms.com today.

3 Oak Grove Elementry School

Buddy Day

701-373-7114

www.oakgrovelutheran.com

Buddy Days are held during the school year and provide an excellent opportunity for students to learn more about Oak Grove. Seeing the campus for yourself – attending classes, experiencing chapel, meeting students and teachers will give you a good idea of what the school has to offer. Call in advance to register.

4

Walk for Wishes

www.ndwish.org

The Make-A-Wish Foundation’s Walk For Wishes is one of the nation’s largest walkathons. This is your chance to join in and help make wishes come true. Walkers of all ages and fitness levels are encouraged to participate in a 5k (about 3 miles) walk. The event is free to participate in, however, each walker must collect a minimum of $25 in order to recieve a Walk for Wishes t-shirt!

4

Cosmic Bowling

701-241-1353

www.fargoparks.com

Bring the whole family for bowling at its wildest times with music, lights, prizes and more at West Acres Bowl from 12:30pm - 2:30pm. Cost: $8.00 per person.

7

Fargo Swings

701-306-9681

www.fargoswings.com

Date Night? How about kicking up your heels with your honey? Every

Tuesday night at the Avalon from 8:30pm - 9:30pm learn East Coast Swing, Lindy Hop, Shim Sham and from 9:30pm - 10:30pm cut loose with free dance. Cost: Adults $7.00 Students $5.00.

8-9

Flyin’ High at the Red River Zoo

701-277-9240

www.redriverzoo.org

From chickens to eagles, and “Stan”, the crane, get ready to explore life in flight as we talk about the different birds found at the zoo and what you can do to help them survive their yearly migration. Starts at 9:30am on the 8th and 2:00pm on the 9th for kids ages 4-6 years. Cost: $10 for members or $15 for non-members.

9-19

IIHF World U18 Hockey Championship

701-364-3672

www.upcenterfargo.org

The United States will host its first ever IIHF World U18 Championship in Fargo and Moorhead. This 10-team cham-

pionship will features the world’s best players under the age of 18. If you are a hockey freak you won’t want to miss out on this historic event. Online event packages available.

11

Kids Book Club“ Pictures of Hollis Woods”

701-241-1496

www.fargolibrary.org

Join the kids book club and enjoy great stories with new friends. Kids Book Club meets the second Saturday of every month from 1:00pm - 2:00pm from September through June. For kids in grades 4 through 6. Space is limited. Call for more details.

12

Harlem Globetrotters

701-241-9100

www.fargodome.com

It is fun and games with these guys in town! Start time 4:00pm. Ticket prices range from $17.00 - $65.00.

Richtman’s ad place holder

12

Happy Easter

Chocolate bunnies, jelly beans and egg hunts!

14

Youth Book Club

218-233-7594

www.larl.org

Elementary-age kids can discuss fun books, work on a project and eat snacks! Book choice: “The Willoughbys” by Lois Lowry. 1:00pm.

16

Car Seat Safety Check

701-234-5570

www.fmambulance.com

Are your car seats installed correctly? Don’t take the chance! Make an appointment between 1:30pm - 5:30pm at FM Ambulance.

16

Park Christian School New Student Visitation Day

218-236-0500

www.parkchristianschool.org

See what Park Christian School has to offer. Please call Teresa Nickel to reserve your spot.

18

B.L.A.S.T. Babysitters Day

Camp

701-234-5570

www.fmambulance.com

The initial course for teens and preteens on the responsibilities of caring for children. They will learn CPR and first aid for children, as well as diaper changing techniques, also learn about when to call 911 and what will happen if they do need emergency assistance. The course is designed for young babysitters ages 11 – 15. Limited space. Register online.

18

Awesome Art Afternoon

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Come and spend an afternoon creating fun and exciting art projects at Robert D. Johnson Rec Center. Children will be able to create a variety of art projects to take home from 1:00pm - 3:00pm.

23

Teen Movie Night “Hellboy”

701-476-5978

www.fargolibrary.org

Teen movie night is every 4th Thursday of the month from 4:30pm - 6:30pm in the Community Room the Dr. James Carlson Library. Call the teen librarian for more details.

25

Bumblebee Brunch

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Join in a fun bug themed brunch with crafts and activities at Rheault Farm from 9:30am - 11:00am. Cost: $3.00 for kids and $5.00 for adults.

25

Garden Party

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Get in the gardening mood and make buggy snacks, insect crafts and go on a bug hunt at Rheault Farm from 1:30pm - 4:30pm.

27

Car Seat Safety Check

701-234-5570

www.fmambulance.com

Are your car seats installed correctly? Don’t take the chance! Make an appointment between 1:30pm - 5:30pm at Luther Family Buick Pontiac GMC.

29

Footloose

701-241-9100

www.fargodome.com

Everybody cut loose! Grab the girls and get out for a night of theatre. Start time 7:30pm. Ticket price range from $26.50 - $46.50.

29

Kids Are Our Business Breakfast

701-293-7273

www.raccfm.com

Join the Rape and Abuse Crisis Center for breakfast at the Holiday Inn from 7:30am - 8:30am and help out a great cause. Seating is limited so call today. Cost: $60.00 individual tickets.

may events

2 Kite Day

701-241-1353

www.fargoparks.com

Show off your kite flying skills and compete for prizes. From 12:30pm - 3:00pm at Ed Clapp Park.

7 Oak Grove High and Middle School Open House

701-373-7114

www.oakgrovelutheran.com

Open Houses are information sessions about Oak Grove. Families learn details about academics, campus ministry, unique programs, student life and extracurricular activities. Participants have an opportunity to meet administrators, teachers and staff, as well as hear current parents and students share their experience. Find out more about Grades 6 -12 from 7:00pm - 8:00pm at the north campus.

9

13

The Fargo Marathon

www.fargomarathon.com

Up for a challenge? Participate in the priemer running event in the FM area. Run / walk in the, 1K, 5K, half, full marathon or in a relay with a team of friends. Run for yourself or a charity. Visit online for more information and get registered today!

10

Happy Moms Day!

This day’s for you! Live it up!

11

Hot Dog Walk

701-241-1353

www.fargoparks.com

Bring your dog to compete for prizes in categories like: best costume, best trick and dog/owner look alike. From 5:00pm - 8:00pm at Yunker Farm Dog Park.

Community Block Party

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Enjoy a party in the park with music, games and crafts at the Lindenwood Park from 5:30pm - 8:00pm.

15

Redhawks Opener

701-235-6161

www.fmredhawks.com

The Fargo-Moorhead RedHawks will open the 2009 Northern League season against the Gary SouthShore RailCats at 7:00pm at Newman Outdoor Field in Fargo. For ticket information call or view online.

16

B.L.A.S.T. Babysitters Day Camp

701-364-1704

www.fmambulance.com

The initial course for teens and preteens on the responsibilities of caring for children. They will learn CPR and

first aid for children, as well as diaper changing techniques, also learn about when to call 911 and what will happen if they do need emergency assistance. The course is designed for young babysitters ages 11 – 15. Limited space. Register online.

17

Summer Grind

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Beginners, intermediate and advanced bladers and skaters can show off their tricks at this exhibition. 5:00pm registration and 6:00pm start at the Dike West Skate Park.

20

Community Block Party

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Enjoy a party in the park with music, games and crafts at Rheault Farm from 5:30pm - 8:00pm.

21

Car Seat Safety Check

701-234-5570

www.fmambulance.com

Are your car seats installed correctly?

Don’t take the chance! Make an appointment between 1:30pm - 5:30pm at FM Ambulance.

23

B.L.A.S.T. Babysitters Day

Camp

701-234-5570

www.fmambulance.com

The initial course for teens and preteens on the responsibilities of caring for children. They will learn CPR and first aid for children, as well as diaper changing techniques, also learn about when to call 911 and what will happen if they do need emergency assistance. The course is designed for young babysitters ages 11 – 15. Limited space. Register online.

25

Memorial Day!

Remember those we have lost and those who gave their lives for us and our country.

25

Car Seat Safety Check

701-234-5570

Are your car seats installed correctly?

Don’t take the chance! Make an appointment between 1:30pm - 5:30pm at Luther Family Buick Pontiac GMC.

27

Community Block Party

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Enjoy a party in the park with music, games and crafts at Bennett Park from 5:30pm - 8:00pm.

31

Classical Music Festival

701-241-8160

www.fargoparks.com

Listen to performances by the FM Symphony, Jazz Arts Big Band and other local musicians. From 1:00pm - 6:00pm at Trollwood Park.

what’s on your mind?

no just say

to snack lists

story by | lisa montgomery

After scanning through the plethora of papers being emptied from my 4th grader’s backpack, I found the inevitable and dreaded list of names and dates. Please no, it can’t be – it’s another SNACK SCHEDULE!

Am I the only one who dreads snack lists? They’re everywhere – school, sports, you name it – the snack list gets passed out on the first day. Here is a typical locker room scene after a hockey game: “Parents and siblings are squished like sardines, and the unfortunate parent with snacks has to hand them out, and make sure they have extras for all the siblings. The locker room is hot and stinky, and now there are wrappers everywhere.” The dedicated snack parent is frantically trying to make sure no one was left out. “Where’s Tommy? Did he get his snack?” We then proceed home, where I make my son a nice looking turkey sandwich with a glass of milk. However, my little hockey player isn’t hungry. He had 2 bags of Teddy Grahams and a bottle of sugar water (Gatorade). “I’m full,” he says. Well, at least he’s hydrated and has all the electrolytes necessary to make it through the next grueling video game.

Since childhood obesity is becoming an issue in the United States, should we be passing out snacks and sugary beverages after every sporting event? Why not reward them with good old-fashioned verbal praise? “You played great today, Susie. I’m so proud of you.” This means much more to a child than fruit snacks (most children, anyway).

Calorie intake is not the only frustration. It’s the one more thing to keep track of that scares me. Yes, I have failed to remember snacks (“Mom, I was Snack Leader today, and you forgot. It was the worst day ever!”) Yes, I’ve dashed to the grocery store for a last minute dash for doughnut balls at 8 am, then ran down the school hallway in heels to the classroom, only so my child will not get dirty looks from the other kids if he comes up empty handed yet again. I know I’m not alone in this – I’ve seen plenty of parents do the Snack Dash.

Ok, so I’m not the most organized person. It would be nice if I made time to cut up fresh fruit and make 20 individual fruit cups, or whip up Low Sugar Wheat Germ Whole Grain Peanut Free Muffins, but I’m not

that nice, and I have time management issues. When I think back to my grade school days, I do remember my stomach growling louder than a mom with PMS. A teacher might not want to go over vowels with a group of starving students. So how about if kids bring their own snacks to school? We don’t want our children starving, and it’s very difficult to bring a snack for 20+ kids that can please everyone. And, if you forget, your child can mooch off a fellow student this promotes sharing as well.

And back to sporting events. The best thing a parent can do is make sure their child has a light nutritious meal with carbs and protein 2-3 hours prior to a game. And milk or chocolate milk is a much better choice than any sports drink. Unless your little athlete is a marathon runner or enjoys triathlons, sports drinks are not necessary. Forget energy drinks they are loaded with sugar AND caffeine! Kids have enough energy they don’t need caffeine. Moms need caf feine! (Remember, caffeine is a diuretic no one wants to go potty at half-time.)

So...in my perfect world aimed at making Mom’s life easier, providing snacks and drinks after sporting events isn’t necessary. If banned, this could be a very big movement in child sports history. I say we replace those snack lists for the kids with a cocktail list for the moms. Margarita, anyone?

shutter bug

shutter bug

memories forever photography

susie b photography

mompreneur

LilyCare

Dr . Tracie Mallberg, MD

Having always been drawn to the specialty of family medicine, Dr. Tracie Mallberg is one of those nostalgic docs who feel there is great value and comfort in knowing your doctor. The way it lends itself to a real doctor-patient relationship is unique and somewhat hard to find in healthcare these days. With the belief that it is possible even in the size of the F-M area, Dr. Tracie wanted to run her clinic from a patient standpoint and not on a sheer numbers perspective. In June 2008, with six kids and partner, Dan, by her side, Dr. Tracie followed her dream of a private practice and opened the doors to LilyCare. With a family first

photography by | rialee photography

philosophy she began changing the idea of patient care for families in the Fargo -Moorhead community.

how is LilyCare different from other health care providers?

We are different from many of the clinics in the area because we do not try to push patients through in 10 minute time slots. We are interested in maintaining the doctor-patient relationship, not just a patient appointment. I know it seems like a minute difference, but it is more the attitude that is different.

where did the name LilyCare originate from?

That’s actually a funny story. I got a puppet, which I named Fred, for my Medical School graduation. Fred quickly became my mascot, so to speak, while I was in residency. I would use Fred to break the ice with my younger patients and they identified well with my ability to “play”. It quickly evolved into my theme. So, when we were talking about opening the clinic, my 10 year old son, Mason, came up with the idea of “The Lily Pad”. That seemed to transform itself into LilyCare. So when you stop by the clinic you won’t be

surprised that the play area is named “The LilyPad” and you will see frogs of every size and shape.

what advice would you offer to other moms who might be considering new businesses?

Cross your T’s, dot your I’s and surround yourself with people who KNOW that you can succeed. I truly believe that positive attitudes are contagious. If you are passionate about your business and are willing to make some immediate sacrifices, you can succeed. Be flexible and don’t panic.

what motivates you each morning to go to work?

The love of my family, my children and the support of those who always knew I could, even before I did. I went through a few very difficult years when I went through a very painful divorce. I really struggled to see justice and the good that was around me. I got through it because I had friends and family who could see what I couldn’t and were there for every tear and triumph. I owe it to them and I owe it to me to live my dream.

Do you…

wake up feeling tired and drained?

have health issues that are unexplained and just won’t go away?

have places in your home nobody wants to spend time in?

have trouble growing your business?

If you’ve answered yes to any of these questions, experience my newest service, Energy Dowsing. You don’t have to spend another minute in a space that doesn’t feel good. Contact me today! www.JodieHarvala.com Jodie@JodieHarvala.com

who is the person that you most admire?

There are many professors in my life who I have used as models for professionalism, doctors who I thought “I hope I am that good someday,” my parents who were models of unconditional love, brothers as true friends. But the person that I admire most is my significant other, Dan. He has shown me how to survive tremendous adversity and come through it with the grace of one blessed. When we came to know each other he was widowed with two small children yet remained strong, calm and full of love and admiration. Dan has been the window that has helped me see that which doesn’t kill us does truly make us stronger and wiser. Together we have developed a new future and believe no experience in life is wasted, we must simply use it to adjust the perspective by which we see the world.

what qualities would your patients use to describe you?

I think my patients would describe me as “just regular.” I find that a huge compliment. I think people want a physician, who they can talk to, relate to, who doesn’t make them feel silly or like someone less. There is rarely just one right answer in medicine and I find that if we work together to get to a solution, the patient is usually more successful, happy and better off in the end.

as a mom and doctor, how do you balance it all?

People have been asking me that ever since I started med school with an 8 week old baby (Mason) and still nursing. They asked the same question during 2nd year when I had Tatum and went back to school 5 days after my c-section. Again during 4th year when Carson was born and you know they still asked during my 1st year of residency when my daughter Tessa was born. I always gave them the same answer. I don’t know!

Just like every other stay-at-home mom, working mom, college student, etc. I fumble and struggle just like everyone else does. I have spent many days

with baby spit on my shoulder and taking phone calls from the daycare about which one was running a fever, throwing up on the teacher or having an accident on the playground. Now they are older and I deal with custody arrangements, school sports and getting hair “just right.” I made a rule in med school that I always took “kid time.” From 5 until bed time was time that I gave to my kids. There are and always have been exceptions, but it is the rule more often than not. We, Dan and I and all 6 of our kids, sit down to supper together almost every night of the week. We do have a schedule of who cleans up supper (2 kids at a time) because it is rarely me. The biggest rule is to help. If we work together we can be amazing….apart we are just 8 individuals.

what else should we know about LilyCare?

As of December 1st we have expanded to include Dr. Shantell TwoBears and Melissa Erdmann (both formerly of Red River Family Practice) as a part of our LilyCare Family. We all have similar practice styles and the attitude that patient care comes first.

Tracie M. Mallberg MD LilyCare Clinic

550

13th Ave E, West Fargo

701.356.5459 www.lilycareclinic.com

shop talk

photography by | scott thuen

treatingallergies

story by | dr. susan mathison, md

The American Academy of Allergy, Asthma and Immunology estimates that more than 50 million Americans are affected by allergies, and that more than half of us test positive for one or more allergens, such as pollen, dust, molds, animal dander and foods. Allergies are one of the leading causes of lost productivity in the work place, and according to the National Institutes of Health, allergies account for 2 million missed school days per year. On any given day, more than 10,000 children are absent from school because of allergies.

For our children, allergies may be the one of the culprits for excema, otitis media, congestion, snoring, resurrect sinus infections and cough. Family history, discussion about exposures to smoke, pets, dust and daycare, as well as careful physical examination help to figure out the factors involved.

For patients with significant symptoms, improving the home environment to minimize dust, mold and pet exposure is helpful. Over-the-counter and prescription medications can ease the itching, sneezing and congestion. Despite these measures, more that 75% of patients still feel miserable. Allergy immunotherapy, more commonly known as “allergy shots,” is another

is no longer just a shot in the arm

common treatment for allergy sufferers. Regular injections of a tiny dose of the allergen protein slowly build up the body’s immunity to that allergen, relieving symptoms that range from a frustrating sneezing bout to a life-threatening reaction. While allergy shots are highly effective, the prospect of 3-5 years worth of regular injections can be a significant obstacle.

What is not well known is that there is an at-home treatment available, sublingual immunotherapy (allergy drops). Catalyst Medical Center, directed by Dr. Susan Mathison and Dr. Lesley Soine, has partnered with Allergy Choices, Inc. of LaCrosse, WI, to provide this at-home treatment to patients in our region. The World Health Organization expert panel supports sublingual drops, and in many European countries drops are the first-line of treatment.

Allergy drops are placed under the tongue versus a syringe being injected into the arm. These patientfriendly drops are safe and are particularly effective for people who are unable to tolerate, don’t respond to, or are not appropriate for injection immunotherapy including infants and children and those with other health concerns. For most patients, symptoms are reduced significantly, and the need for other medications by 88%. Children can be the greatest benefactors of sublingual therapy because their immune systems are receptive to therapy. Recent studies have shown that children treated with immunotherapy for their allergies are less likely to develop asthma as well as any new sensitivities.

Benefits to allergy drops include lower costs, fewer clinic visits, convenience, less medication and less time lost from work and school.

1800 21st Ave S, Fargo 701.365-8700

catalystmedicalcenter.com

Catalyst Medical Center is the premier clinic in the region to provide sublingual immunotherapy. The clinic is headquartered in Fargo, ND, with outreach locations in Jamestown and Grand Forks, ND, and Detroit Lakes and Ada, MN. The center provides ear, nose and throat care, facial plastic surgery and other medical and cosmetic services.

keep it straight! why should children have chiropractic care?

story by | dr. scott van dam, d.c.

Many parents are seeing the benefit of chiropractic care for their children. In fact, many spinal problems seen in adults began as early as birth. It is important to understand that the doctor of chiropractic does not treat conditions or diseases.

The bones of the spine, the vertebrae, house and protect the spinal cord. The spinal cord is an extension of the brain and carries information from the brain to the body parts and back to the brain again. Subluxations interfere with the nerves’ ability to transmit this vital information.

The expertise of the chiropractor is in checking your child’s spine for misalignments that impair nervous system function, which effect overall body function.

The nerve system controls and coordinates the function of all the systems in the body; circulatory, respiratory, digestive, hormonal, eliminative and immune system. Any aspect of health may be impaired by nerve interference. The chiropractic adjustment restores nerve system function allowing the body the ability to express a greater state of health and wellbeing. These benefits can be seen from birth and as your child grows.

Even so called “natural” birthing methods can stress an infant’s spine and developing nerve system. The resulting irritation to the nerve system caused by spinal and cranial misalignments can be the cause of many newborn health complaints. Colic, breathing problems, nursing difficulties, sleep disturbances, allergic reactions and chronic infections can often be traced to nerve system stress.

As your baby grows, learns to hold his/her head, sit, crawl and walk, spinal alignment is affected. These are important times to have a child checked by a Doctor of Chiropractic. As your child begins to participate in regular childhood activities like skating or riding bike, small yet significant spinal misalignments (subluxations) may occur. If neglected, the injuries during this period of rapid growth may lead to more serious problems later in life. Trauma from an injury is one of the most common reasons parents seek care for their child. These misalignments may or may not result in immediate pain or symptoms and even subtle trauma throughout childhood will affect the future development of the spine leading to impaired nervous system function. And let’s not forget about the resolution of symptoms or conditions such as ear infections, asthma and headaches to name a few.

Proper spinal hygiene is an important key to better health. Before treating your child, a thorough case history is taken and a chiropractic exam is performed to determine if spinal subluxations exist. Chiropractic adjusting procedures are modified to fit your child’s size, weight and unique spinal condition. They are both gentle and specific to the child’s developing spinal structures. Most parents report their children enjoy their chiropractic adjustments and look forward to subsequent visits in addition to experiencing a greater level of health.

Dr. Van Dam is a member of the International Chiropractic Pediatrics Association and a doctor at Origin Chiropractic Physicians in Fargo. If you would like further information you can go to www.icpa4kids.org/htm or email Dr. Van Dam at ocpdrs@ideaone.net. Portions of the article courtesy of Dr. Jeanne Ohm.

mod mom

photography by | rialee photography

jerilynn brantner adams

age 40

fargo attorney

married mom of 11 and 9 year old sons

ways I connect with my boys…

Is try to be involved in every part of my boys’ lives. But, I think it is especially important to be involved in and encourage their individual interests. Christian loves football and reading. Jackson loves astronomy and art. I feel I really connect with my children by spending one-on-one time with each of them doing the things they love.

the one person who I am most inspired by…

Are my parents who have been happily married for 51 years, raised 5 children and always stayed strong in their faith in God.

i am most proud of…

The intelligent, imaginative, conscientious and polite young men my boys are becoming.

i balance my family life and profession by…

Trying hard to stay organized. However, when one conflicts with the other, family always comes first.

me time is spent…

With my friends. Family is my number one priority, but living in a house with all boys, I sometimes just need some time with the girls.

the person I can always count on…

Is my entire family. I am very blessed to have a close and loving family who not only are there for me, but who also give me honest, thoughtful advice.

i admire my husband’s ability to…

Be a really great father! In that regard, I most admire Jon’s ability to balance fatherhood. On the one hand, Jon provides consistent and effective discipline and guidance for the boys. On the other hand, he is a loving, affectionate father who truly is not afraid to show emotion.

something I want my boys to always remember…

That I will always love them. I tell them at least once every single day.

i teach my boys the value of a dollar by… Making sure the boys do their fair share of work around our home. They don’t do chores for an allowance, but because one of our mottos is “everyone works” and they need to contribute to the family. If they really want to save for something, they need to do something above and beyond what is expected. We want them to know that earning money is hard work.

my greatest mom moment…

Is actually the two happiest days of my life; when my children were born. Since their births, there have been so many moments when I have been extremely proud to be their mother. It would be too difficult to pick just one moment.

If you have a snoring problem, you need to call Dr. Porter. He’s a board-certified specialist who has successfully treated hundreds of people for snoring problems since 1984. Dr. Porter will also check for signs of sleep apnea, which, if left untreated, can lead to serious health problems.

STOP-SNORING CONSULT (A$50value!)

• Nonsurgical treatments tried first • Surgery, even minimally invasive surgery, is always the last resort

Why keep taking over-the-counter medicine for temporary relief from sinus problems? With Dr. Porter’s expertise in endoscopic surgical techniques, you can find fast and lasting relief from postnasal drip, sinus headaches, sinus infections, nosebleeds, tearing problems and nasal blockage.

(A$50value!)

• Outpatient procedure in state-of-the-art surgery center or local hospital

story by | nancy tisor

bullies:

adult help needed or not?

It is Emily’s first day at school. She asks some classmates if she can sit at their table. They tell her it is being saved, but one of the students knows this is not true.

Bridget and Josephine are at the library when Josephine receives a text message from Ann. She is making fun of Josephine’s clothes.

Ellen is sitting in class when she notices that Tony is poking Bob’s leg every time the teacher turns his/her back.

Joe and Lilly are running for class president. Joe tells Tom that he is going to start a rumor that Lilly cheated on a test.

It is time for recess and Paul feels sick to his stomach. He knows that Dalton and his friends are waiting for him outside. He wonders how they are going to hurt him today.

Bullying comes in all shapes and sizes, all socioeconomic groups, both genders and all ages. How do adults help the situation and empower the child being picked on and let the child doing the bullying know it’s not okay? Let’s first take a look at defining and understanding what bullying is and what it isn’t and what you the adult can do to help the children in your life.

bullying: what it is and what it isn’t

Bullying is defined as a stronger, more powerful person hurting or frightening a smaller or weaker person deliberately and repeatedly. There are 3 key words for us as adults to take out of that definition. Those words are power, deliberate and repeatedly. Let’s look at the difference between bullying and typical, normal arguing or disagreeing between children.

rough play or horse play: usually happens between friends, repeated, balance of power, no intent to harm, children feel friendly and positive toward each other.

real fighting: usually happens between children who are not friends, typically does not happen more than once, power is relatively equal, intent to harm, the children feel negative, aggressive, tense, and hostile toward each other.

bullying: usually does not happen between friends (except for girls), generally repeated, unequal power, intent to harm, the victim and the bully will feel differently about the experience.

Another way to help us understand is to look at some myths that pertain to bullying. Here are just a few of those false statements:

Bullies are usually the most unpopular students in school. —Bullies can be anyone.

Bullies typically have low self-esteem. —Most bullies feel very good about themselves.

Bullying is a “harmless rite of passage” that should be ignored. —Bullying should never be ignored.

Bullying is only about being physically hurt. – Bullying can also be verbal, social and emotional.

Bullies are only boys. —Both boys and girls are involved in bullying. Their bullying looks very different, though.

Bullying only occurs on playgrounds and in neighborhoods. —Bullying has entered the world of the internet. Cyber bullying is not something to be ignored and happens through e-mail, text messaging and other internet possibilities.

bullying: girls are different than boys

Girls do bully differently than boys. They usually don’t act as the stereotypical, tough playground or neighborhood bully that picks on one or two weaker students. Girl bullies work in groups with a leader. The bullying will tend to be more emotional, psychological and relational. Some examples of girl bullying are:

• Spreading of rumors and gossip

• Leaving hurtful messages by way of notes, voicemails, instant messaging, etc.

• Socially shutting others out

• Non-verbal signs of disapproval – rolling of eyes, glaring, sighs, whispers

• Name calling bullying: how do adults help the bully

If you think a young person in your life could be a bully, watch for these signs: enjoy putting others down, don’t care about others feelings, disrespect authority and people who are different from them, disregard rules, need to have power over others and enjoy violence. Once you notice more than one of these signs over a period of time, here’s what you can do to help:

• Stay calm. Focus on how to help them learn positive behavior.

• Talk about it. Ask them why they bully others. Help them come up with nonviolent ways to deal with their strong feelings.

• Make it clear you think bullying is wrong and set clear, nonviolent consequences for any future bullying behavior.

bullying: how do adults help the bullied

That is a big question and one that many adults struggle with. We tend to use strategies that either we grew up with or we believe will work. Some of those methods are: ignore the bullying and it will stop, fight back and put the bully in their place, etc. Unfortunately, those methods have not been working and often can actually make things worse. Before the

young person in your life even goes to school there are strategies that you can teach them. Here are a few listed below:

1. Start early in teaching your child how to advocate for themselves.

2. Teach them different problem solving methods.

3. Encourage peer relationships and teach them social skills. That will help reduce their vulnerability to bullying behaviors.

As soon as a child begins school there are also strategies that can be effective. Let’s take a look at those strategies that work and can make the situation better instead of worse.

1. Key in to the words “picked on” when your child is reporting a situation to you. Those words imply that it is ongoing and not a one time occurrence.

2. Define the words “tattling” and “reporting.” Children need to know that tattling is what they do when they are trying to get another child in trouble. Reporting is what they do when a child is trying to keep themselves or another student safe.

3. Listen to the child in your life as they report situations and keep your emotions in check. Children will mimic the emotion that the adult they are telling is experiencing. Try and get the factual information needed: who, what, when, where and how.

4. If the situation is happening at school, contact school officials (principal, school counselor, classroom teacher) and work with them to help solve the problem.

5. Teach the child in your life safety strategies.

a. How to seek help from an adult.

b. Encourage them to stay with a group of friends and not put themselves in situations where they are alone.

c. Encourage your child to stand up for themselves by using their words and not their fists. Teach them the difference between assertive-

ness and aggressiveness. Model for them how to use their body language to show they are not afraid.

6. Help the child in your life develop their talents and strengths. When children feel good about themselves they are more apt to assert themselves in situations when they need to.

Bullying affects everyone in a family. There can be serious consequences. Children who are bullied can feel depressed, anxious, lonely, physically sick, etc. A child’s home is where they should feel safe and loved. It should be a place where they know they can take shelter both physically and emotionally. Bullying will be combated when you and the child in your life keep communication lines open. You can be the difference that a child needs.

source: Olweus: Bullying Prevention Program, Stop Bullying Now, The National Alliance for Parent Centers, Denver Public Schools, Prevent Child Abuse America

angela smith out loud living

There are mental scars, physical scars, large scars and deep scars that leave more of an impact than others. Scars remind us of what we’ve been through and what we’ve learned from this journey we call life. Some scars leave us feeling defeated, while others give us a new direction. Angela Smith bears a scar on her right arm. A physical reminder of all she has overcome.

story by | karina hodny photography by | rialee photography

Itis reported that 1 in 4 women will be a victim of domestic violence or sexual assault. The Rape and Abuse Crisis Center here in Fargo provided services for 1,699 victims of domestic violence in 2007. Domestic violence is an issue that desperately needs a voice. “You go through three stages when you’re in a domestic violence situation,” explains Angela Smith, Fargo mother of four and reigning Mrs. North Dakota International. “You go from victim to survivor and then to hero. It’s not Superman kind of hero, but it is the hero of your own story. You make a choice to rise above it.” This is how Angela found her voice and chose to become the hero of her story.

VICTIM Angela was working as a waitress while going to college when she met Todd*. “He was the embodiment of all things charming,” recalled Angela. “I was completely star struck.” He was good looking, said all the right things and swept Angela off her feet. In a few short months they were married, but things quickly changed.

“It was night and day difference after we got married. Within five days of getting married [he] was a completely different man.” Todd’s controlling nature was the first sign of trouble ahead. Angela was working in addition to going to college and each payday, as she arrived home, she was met at the door and instructed to hand over her paycheck and to keep fifteen dollars for herself. He also put gas in her car so she had enough to get to work and back home. “A lot of it started as little stuff and escalated from

there.” Todd’s controlling nature transitioned into an unmanageable temper and verbal and physical abuse followed. The man Angela thought she married was not the man she was living with. She was living in fear of what would come next and what the consequences would be.

One day as Angela ran home between class and work, Todd demanded she make dinner before leaving. She quickly put a frozen pizza in the oven, but time got away from her. The pizza was burned, which sent Todd into a rage. His solution to teach Angela to never let this happen again was to leave a painful reminder. He took the hot cookie sheet from the oven and burned her upper arm. The resulting scar would impact her life far greater than the physical pain of that night.

SURVIVOR What is it like to be hostage to an angry man in your home? “When he was there it was ugly,” recalled Angela. “When he wasn’t there it was tense because I never knew when he was coming home.” Angela knew she needed to get out of the abusive situation she found herself in. She needed to do it for herself and for an even bigger reason. Angela was pregnant.

A warm day in October started like most others, but would end much differently. “I had no idea I was leaving when I woke up in the morning,” recalled Angela. “I had been working late and all the tip money was gone from the drawer. Todd had been ill tempered and yelling more than normal, even doing it in front of his sister once. I remember thinking throughout the day that we were headed for a serious blow up and being nervous that there was no way to predict when it would happen.”

“I knew I couldn’t risk my pregnancy,” Angela continued. “I found strength in knowing that I had a responsibility to my child to make his life as safe as possible and staying with Todd meant risking that safety daily.”

Angela decided to talk to her parents, who to this point only had a vague idea that something was not right. She stopped by the salon where she knew her mom was getting her hair done and by chance her dad was there as well. Angela gave them a brief overview

I found strength in knowing that I had a responsibility to my child

of what was happening. “They were 100% supportive and that support gave me the courage to take that first step out the door,” Angela remembered. “I knew I wasn’t alone - I had a plan.” Her mind was set, but before returning one last time to her home, she made one more decision for herself.

“I looked at the other stylist on duty and asked if she had time to cut my hair. She said ‘sure what do you want to do?’ ‘Cut it all off’ I told her. We put it in a pony tail and cut it off. It was one of the most liberating things I’d ever done. Todd loved my hair long. He commented on it almost daily and by cutting it off I was not only telling him, I was showing him that he wasn’t in control of me, my hair or my life anymore.”

Angela knew Todd was angry about her hair cut when they met in the doorway. “I knew I’d hit a nerve, but rather than apologizing as he expected I actually pushed past him as I replied ‘It doesn’t matter, I won’t be here in the morning.’ He was actually speechless and I had to remind him he was going to be late for work.” Four months pregnant, Angela left Todd.

Angela and her son started their new life and through a church event, she met her husband. Jared was everything he seemed and more. “Angela is a loving and caring person,” Jared explains. “She is very positive about life and everything that is thrown at her.”

HERO Writing has provided Angela an opportunity to heal. She credits a creative writing instructor at NDSU for encouraging her to deal with her history, a history she wasn’t sure she really needed to deal with – until she started writing poetry. “She told me ’you need to be doing more with this and you need to be using your poetry to deal with whatever your demons are.’ Writing gave me a voice when I was still too scared to voice anything aloud. It took the pieces of my experience, brought them together and held them in place keeping them from destroying me until I found a way to heal the hurt and suck the poison out of my heart. Then when I was ready to spit it out it gave me a way of saying ‘I’m not crazy,’ this was real and it won’t control my life anymore. Now those writings have given me a way to reach others and show them that hope brings healing and healing brings happiness.”

Being Mrs. North Dakota International has allowed Angela the opportunity to help many people. “I’m not a beauty queen. I’m a title holder and I’m working to make a difference. “

“Angela has a gift of expressing her survival and strength through her poetry and public speaking,” Greg Diehl, Executive Director, Rape & Abuse Crisis Center explains. “She brings an authentic voice to domestic violence and her message is strong. We appreciate the fact that she is highlighting domestic violence through her platform.” YWCA Cass Clay Executive Director, Erin Prochnow adds, “Her personal challenges, both as a woman and a mother, have provided an interesting perspective, as we work with women who have faced similar challenges. Angela lends a great blend of empowerment, education, and compassion to the issue of domestic violence.”

Angela has touched countless people while speaking at events like the Take Back the Night, being a part of the Clothesline Project, working with the Fargo Moorhead YWCA shelter or simply handing out her autograph card. This past summer at an appearance during the Red River Valley Fair Angela was approached by a young girl no older than ten. She wanted to know what domestic violence was. Angela, while taken aback by the question from someone so young, explained that domestic violence is when someone you love hurts you whether you live with

them or not. The little girl proceeded to tell Angela, “My daddy hits my mommy and makes her cry.”

“It killed me,” Angela recalled. The typical autograph card of someone in Angela’s position includes sponsorship information, but hers includes domestic violence website resources. “There’s a safety mechanism there,” she explained. “It’s just a pretty picture that someone brought home and most abusers are not going to pay attention to it.” Angela gave the little girl the card and the little girl assured her she would pass it on to her mom. “I felt, especially this past year that I was in a position to be where I needed to be when I was needed to be there.”

On March 28th a new Mrs. North Dakota International will be crowned. “It has been a journey getting to a place where I could work past my fear and make myself uncomfortable in order to help others. I hope I have helped people see that it is about giving back to others and using the crown not as a pedestal, but as a microphone.”

It’s unfortunate to have had the experiences that Angela has had, but she feels that much good has come from it. “It gives the abuser so much more power

when we don’t talk about it.” With local shelters filled beyond capacity, domestic violence is still prevalent. The stories of those who persevere and become the hero of their story, as Angela has, bring hope to those 1 in 4 feeling defeated, powerless and victimized by some type of domestic violence. To those, Angela lends this advice, “First, I would tell them they are stronger than they think they are. I would remind them that people care and are willing to help, but they have to take the first step. They have to reach out to someone and let them know they aren’t alone. Regardless of how bad things are right now they can get better, but they have to take a leap and step into the unknown. No one can fight their battle for them, but they will find themselves surrounded by allies if they are willing to allow others in. Finally, I would tell them not to lose hope.”

Angela can be assured she has made a difference and is the hero of her story. “For me the most gratifying part of my work is seeing hope in someone’s eyes when it wasn’t there before. It is reaching out to someone who is struggling, taking their hand, sharing my story and seeing the faintest spark of faith in themselves. I know that spark will start a fire and help another woman take control and move forward and she in turn will reach out to someone else someday and eventually we will stop the violence in our homes.”

North Dakota International Pageant

March 27th & 28th

Fargo South High School Theater

For more information: 701.232.3196 or www.ndpageants.com

scars

by: angela smith

I love that I have nearly forgotten

What you look like

Sound like

Smell like

I love that I have stopped waking up

In a cold sweat

Afraid of the man lying next to me

Panicked he will hurt me

Tasting the fear he inspires

Dreading the morning and what might happen

I love looking at my scar

Knowing you can never leave another one

I love how my son

Bolts across the room or yard as he plays

How his laugh fills a room bringing life to it

I love his need to explore everything around him

The tree tops, dirt beneath rocks, the pond in our back yard

I love the fearless way he questions and argues about everything

He is…

A child still

I love that you can’t

Control us with your threats

Hurt us with your fists

Scar us with your hateful words

Scare us into silence

I love life

I love opening my door and knowing you aren’t there

I love that you aren’t apart of

The anxiety on the first day of school

Rape and Abuse Crisis Center

317 8th St North

Fargo, ND 58102

24 HOUR CRISIS PHONE LINE

701.293.7273 or 1.800.344.7273

YWCA Emergency Shelter

3000 S. University Dr. Fargo, ND 58103

701.232.3449

The festivities of Christmas

The heartache of losing a friend, pet, grandparent

I love knowing you can’t destroy

The chaos that accompanies meals, vacations, games, life

I love that you are gone

oreo® truffle kisses®

Ingredients:

1 8 oz. package Oreo ® cookies

1 8 oz. package cream cheese

1 package chocolate flavored almond bark

1 package vanilla flavored almond bark

Directions:

1. Crush all cookies in a food processor or place them in a Ziploc ® bag. Using a rolling pin, crush into a fine consistency. Dump into medium size mixing bowl.

2. Stir in softened cream cheese. Use the back of a large spoon to help blend together.

3. Roll the mixture into 1” balls and place on a wax paper covered cookie sheet.

4. Begin to form the truffles into the shape of a larger version of a Hersey Kiss®. Flatten the bottom and form into a cone shape with a pointed top roughly 1 ½” in height.

5. To help hold the shape of the truffles and prevent crumbling when coated in the warm almond bark, place truffles on the cookie sheet into the freezer for one hour before dipping.

6. Melt almond bark (chocolate or vanilla) as directed on package. With a fork lower truffles one at a time into almond bark and gently shake off excess. Carefully slide truffle off the fork and onto a wax paper covered cookie sheet to dry for 30 minutes.

7. Once dry, melt opposite flavored almond bark and drizzle with a fork over truffles. Allow fifteen minutes to harden before sharing. Store truffles covered in refrigerator.

Accessorize:

1. Hand write messages or create labels on the computer. Cut the message tag into 1/4” tall strips. Make it as long as needed for the chosen saying.

2. Use light weight aluminum foil to cut 4” x 4” squares for wrapping.

3. Place dry truffles in center of square and start wrapping the foil around the base and up the truffle. Insert message tag near top point and secure it by pressing the foil together.

4. Use a decorative box to display foiled truffles or simply share individually wrapped truffles with friends, teachers, co-workers or that sweet and special Valentine.

source: fluge recipe file

photography by | scott thuen

down the aisle

This Valentine’s Day give someone a BIG kiss…. an Oreo ® Truffle Kiss, that is.

brought to you by

resources, support, volunteer

Find Help, Get Answers, Make a Difference

FM Dads 2nd and 4th Monday of each month at 6:30pm. For dads seeking parenting skills - Call for location an details 701.237.0359

Eating Disorders Group Every Monday at 5:00pm. For family and friends of loved ones with eating disorders. Eating Disorder Institute 701.234.4111

DivorceCare for Kids 13 week session for kids ages 5 to 12 from 6:30pm to 8:30pm at Hope Lutheran South Campus – Call for session dates 701.235.6629

Red River Moms Of Multiples 2nd Tuesday of each month at 6:30pm in the Community Room at West Acres. For more information visit www.rrvmothersofmultiples.org

New RESOLVE infertility Group Supportive talk with other women who are in the process of their family building journey. For more information contact Jennifer at 701.306.0825 or jennifer.wicklow@gmail.com

La Leche League of Fargo-Moorhead 3rd Thursday of each month at 6:30pm. For more information contact Jull Christianson – jillkensok@hotmail.com or 701.298.8950

Moms Night Out 3rd Thursday of each month at 7:00pm. For moms of kids with diabetes. West Acres Food Court. For more information visit www.jdrf.org/Minnesota.com

Child Asperger Support Group Every Tuesday from 12:00pm to 1:00pm at Southeast Human Service Center. For additional information visit www.rrvasperger.org

Fargo-Moorhead Home Schoolers Christian home schooling Moms who want to network ideas and provide support to homeschooling families. For more information contact Karen - jkisgrig@msn.com or call 701.967.8990

Breastfeeding Support Group Meets once a month from 6:00pm to 7:00pm at Innovis Health. Call 701.364.8100 or visit www.innovishealth.com for more information and other support group opportunities

Sleep Disorder Support Group Meets monthly at Grace Methodist Church – Moorhead. For more information contact Donna at 218.494.3443

MOPS Mothers of Preschoolers in FM Area:

Atonement Lutheran Church Every other Tuesday from 8:45am to 11:00am. For more information call 701.280.1447

Bethel Evangelical Free Church Meets every other Tuesday at 8:45am to 11:00am. For more information contact 701.232.4476

Calvary Baptist Church 2nd and 4th Tuesday of each month starting at 6:30pm at Calvary Baptist Church 701.232.6010

First Assembly of God 2nd and 4th Tuesday of each month from 9:00am to11:00am. For more information call 701.232.0003

First Lutheran Church 1st and 3rd Tuesday from 9:00am to 11:00am. For more information call 701.235.7389

First United Methodist 1st and 3rd Thursday of each month from 9:15am to11:15am. Moms of children newborn through kindergarten are invited as well. Contact Jessica 701.364.9570

Grace Evangelical Lutheran Church 2nd Sunday of each month from 2:00pm to 4:00pm. For more information call 701.232.1516

Hope Lutheran Church South Campus 3rd Saturday of each month from 9:00am to 11:00am. Contact Amy 293.3279 (Begins September 20th)

Olivet Lutheran Church 1st and 3rd Thursday of each month at 9:00am to 11:15am. For more information call. 701.235.6603

New Prairie Heights Community Church 2nd Thursday of each month from 6:00pm to 8:00pm at Temple Baptist Church. Childcare is provided. For more information call Lisa Burchill at 701.298.9181

Riding On Angels’ Wings Therapeutic horseback riding for children with disabilities. Volunteers are always welcome. Contact Bette Shipley - Felton, MN 701.793.5153 or www.ridingonangelswings.org

Make-A-Wish Foundation of ND Nations largest wish granting organization. Ways to help: volunteer, donate, sponsor or refer a child. Contact ND Chapter in Fargo 701.280.9474 or visit www.ndwish.org

Ronald McDonald House of RRV A home-away-fromhome for families when a child is ill. Support or Volunteer. Call 701.232.3980 or visit www.rmhcfargo.org

YWCA of Cass Clay Provide services and programs for women of all ages. Support, volunteer, donate. Call 701.232.3449 or visit www.ywcacassclay.org

United Way Work to make our community a better place to live, work and raise our families. To give, advocate, volunteer. Call 701.237.5050 or visit www.uwcc.net

Rape & Abuse Crisis Center Crisis intervention, advocacy, and counseling services to all persons who have been victims of domestic violence or sexual abuse. Volunteer or donate. Call 701.293.7273 or visit www.raccfm.com

New FirstChoice Clinic Provides pregnancy confirmation and counseling, prenatal and parenting classes, community referrals to help individuals make life affirming choices. Call 701.237.5902 or visit www.firstchoiceclinic.com. Volunteer or donate at www.teamfirstchoiceclinic.com

Special Olympics Provides year-round sports training for all kids and adults with intellectual disabilities. Volunteer Contact Laura 701.730.0926 or visit www.specialolympics.org

Camp Fire USA Builds caring, confident youth and future leaders. Contact Myrna Johnson 218. 236.1090 or visit www.campfire.org

Moms and More 1st Tuesday of each month from 6:30pm to 8:30pm and 3rd Tuesday from 11:00am to 1:00pm for play dates. Fargo Baptist Church 701.232.5500

Red River Celiacs 1st Saturday of each month at Sydney’s Health Market. For more information contact Stacey Juhnke at redriverceliacs@gluten.net

Doulas of the Red River Valley 1st Tuesday of each month from 7:00pm to 9:00pm at Ristretto’s. For more information call Jen at 218.287.51783

If you are part of a group, have a resource, or offer a class and would like to share with FM area moms and their families help us grow our list by dropping us a note at info@onthemindsofmoms.com.

“Have you ever thought about.... ...earning anywhere from a part-time to a professional income from home?” or simply ...helping your family’s health the natural way?”

“...my Mom and Dad both stay home with me”

“…I have the best nutrition and health possible”

“…my home is ‘green’ so I don’t have to worry about dangerous chemicals in the house”

this and that know your child? how well do you

story by | Dani Parkos Fluge

Raising kids is a full time job with a job description that includes nurturing, teaching, talking and listening. With today’s busy and hectic schedules, and technology constantly making us available to everyone, it can be a challenge to feel truly connected with the ones that mean the most to us. Although we do our best to make the most of “together time,” there is nothing like the intimacy that accompanies great conversation. Here’s a chance to learn a little more about your child - with a little challenge. First, you answer the following questions respective to your bundle of

joy. Then, sit down with your child and ask him/her the same questions (just a few at a time if they are younger). How do your answers compare? This is a great way to learn more about your child’s ideas and feelings. Keep an open mind and listen to the answers without correcting or criticizing. Remember to let the time you share together be fun and light and don’t be afraid to let your guard down! To make it even more interesting, allow the tables to turn and have your child ask you the questions!

questions

1. What really makes your child angry?

2. Who is your child’s best friend?

3. If your child met the president, what would he/ she ask?

4. Who is your child’s hero?

5. What is your child’s favorite food?

6. What embarrasses your child most?

7. What does your child worry about most? What are some other fears?

8. What is your child’s favorite subject in school? Most challenging subject?

9. What does your child think is best/worst about his/her birth order?

10. How does he/she feel other people see him/her?

11. If your child could buy anything in the world, what would it be?

12. What tv show would your child choose to live in for a week?

13. What is your child’s favorite summer acitivity? Winter activity?

14. What accomplishment does your child feel most proud of?

15. What has been the biggest disappointment in your child’s life?

16. If your child could choose a new name, what would it be?

17. How is your child different from everyone else?

18. What gift does your child cherish most?

19. Who does your child think is the most important person alive?

20. If there was no tv, how would your child spend his/her time?

21. When would your child say it’s ok to lie?

22. What would your child like to change about you?

23. What is your child’s dream?

24. What does your child want to be when he/she grows up?

25. What would your child say your family does well? for more conversation starters, visit tabletopics.com

grow ready, set

story by | sheri kleinsasser stockmoe

A simple smile can express a million words and emotions. Happiness, confidence, humor and trust can all be revealed with a pearly white smile. Here are some facts, tips and general info to help create that perfect smile for our kids as they grow.

Your

wee one grows so fast. What begins as a coo or a smile soon turns into a drooling mess, eyeing everything from an old shoe to the leg on the kitchen table to gnaw on. Soon that toothless smile is filled with razor sharp chompers.

wee ones (0–18 months)

another milestone

Your wee one’s first tooth will typically appear between 4 and 7 months, but, there are exceptions and you could see that first tooth sooner or later. Regardless of when they come in, teething can be a painful experience for your wee one and you! Red cheeks, swollen and tender

open march 2nd

gums, problems sleeping and a crabby, crabby, crabby wee one are signs of teeth coming in. Here are some things you can do to take the edge off of teething:

• Your wee one finds relief in gnawing on anything and everything, so make sure he has some safe options in the form of toys and teething rings.

• A chilled teething ring (not frozen as it could frostbite lips and gums) or massaging with a cold washcloth can help soothe those tender gums. If your wee one is eating solid foods, cold apple sauce or yogurt can also offer relief.

• A pain reliever such as infant’s acetaminophen (never give your wee one aspirin) or a topical pain reliever that is rubbed on the gums can bring teething relief. Be sure to discuss your options with your doctor, and if you decide to use pain relievers, follow the directions.

Fargo’s Premier Infant Only Center

· Enrolling 6 months – 24 months

· Secured entrance & security cameras running 24 hours throughout center

· One-on-one attention, as well as age appropriate group discovery activities

· Individualized developmental plans emphasizing each child’s physical, social, emotional & intellectual development

· Tailored feeding and sleeping schedules

brusha, brusha, brusha…

Yes, they are going to fall out, but it’s important to keep those baby teeth healthy. They help your wee one to learn how to speak properly, as well as maintain proper spacing and alignment so there is enough room when the permanent teeth come in. The American Dental Association recommends cleaning your wee one’s gums after each feeding with a soft, wet cloth before they even have teeth. Once those teeth appear, start brushing them twice a day. This might not be your favorite thing to do because a wee one that doesn’t want you in their mouth has a jaw like a steal trap, but it is important and up to you to keep those teeth shiny.

the first dental visit should occur within 6 months of the first tooth appearing and no later than 12 months of age.

Your sweet tot is full of sass, smiles and now teeth. They can experience new foods, have their cool Diego toothbrush, as well as test their new found weapons on an unsuspecting playmate.

tots (18 months –3

a little vampire in the making You are picking up little Suzy from daycare and you’re told that she bit little Mark. Yes, your sweet Suzy! And you pray Mark can’t tell his parents who left the puncture wounds on his little arm. Every parent hates to be a part of this scenario, but it is very common. Remember, your tot isn’t biting with the intention of hurting someone. Many times biting happens out of the inability to communicate. Young children can’t fully verbalize how they feel or what they want so they bite to express things such as frustration, excitement, boredom or anxiety. While we might not be able to determine exactly why a toddler bites, it’s up to you to help teach her that biting is a big No-No:

• Take care of the bitten. Don’t put the attention on the biter. Comfort the victim, including yourself.

• Stern & to the point. Tell your tot that biting is not OK, “No, biting” or “We don’t bite.”

• Attention please! Take a look at what is happening in your tot’s world. A new sibling on the way, changes at home or moving to a new house are all reasons your tot might need some extra attention.

• Bite back? Everyone has heard, “bite her back, to show her how it feels,” but many experts don’t

agree. Tots are all about themselves and they can’t put themselves in another’s shoes. And remember, it’s hard to tell your tot, “don’t bite,” when the next minute you’re biting them - talk about mixed signals!

years)

by the age of 3, all 20 baby teeth will have made their appearance.

olds have cavities in their baby teeth. Your communicating preschooler can sound just like an adult. Although in many ways they grow up way too fast, preschoolers may need help leaving behind the old comforts of their first few years of life.

preschooler (3–5 years)

to suck or not to suck

A wee one or tot that sucks her thumb or fingers can be a blessing because she can easily comfort herself. This blessing can turn into a concern when your preschooler resists kicking the habit. Most will outgrow the need for thumb/finger sucking, but

others will need help. If the habit continues once permanent teeth come in, growth problems of the mouth and jaw as well as misalignment of teeth can occur. Here are some tips to help your preschooler kick the habit:

• Keep the reinforcement positive. Be sure to draw attention to the times she isn’t sucking her thumb/finger. Remember that this is a comforting behavior for her and it isn’t going to be easy to quit.

• Put a sock or bandage on it. This will help her remember she doesn’t need to suck that thumb/finger.

• Try some bitter tasting medication. This should not be used as punishment, but rather a reminder not to suck the thumb/finger.

• Wait it out. Listen to the recommendations of your doctor and dentist and follow their lead. Again, most kids will outgrow this habit.

a bad rap

We all have heard that candy is bad for teeth, but is it really true? Cavities are caused by acid eating at the tooth’s enamel. This acid is a byproduct of bacteria that feasts on the food left behind in your teeth. So, the truth is, regardless of what your preschooler is eating, if they are not brushing routinely, the food left behind increases the likelihood of cavities occurring. The solution - keep meals and snacks healthy, candy in moderation (like everything else) and brush those teeth twice a

as many as 28% of 2 to 5 year

the American Association of

Orthodontists recommends a visit to an orthodontist by age 7.

Big kids are active. Sports, bike riding and playing with friends are daily occurrences, and can all lead to accidents involving teeth. This stage also marks the newest whimsical character entering your big kid’s life.

big kids (6–9 years)

Hello tooth fairy

Around age 6, your big kid will start losing baby teeth. The 20 baby teeth will usually fall out in the same order they came in. The last ones will fall out around the age of 12 or 13. Luckily, getting permanent teeth is not as painful as getting those baby teeth.

ouch!

Nobody wants their child’s smile to look like he just beat Mike Tyson for the heavy weight belt. It’s impor tant to know what to do when a tooth injury occurs.

• Baby or permanent – Even though a baby tooth is eventually going to fall out, any trauma should be checked by a dentist to ensure there isn’t any underlying damage to the jaw or permanent tooth.

• Chipped – If your big kid is experiencing pain or sensitivity seek dental treatment right away. If not, contact your dentist to determine if an appointment is necessary.

• Out of place – If the tooth is still attached, but out of place slightly, you can gently put it back in place. If the tooth is basically just dangling there, go to the dentist.

• Knocked out – If you have the tooth, great! Make sure it is clean and if possible put it back

in the socket. If you’re afraid your big kid could swallow the tooth or you are just plain scared of putting it back in, place the tooth in a glass of cold milk, a salt water mix or just plain ol’ spit.

an orthodontist attends 4 years of college, 4 years of dental school, and 2 years of postgraduate study.

Gone are the days of cute little baby teeth and character tooth brushes. With permanent teeth comes the possibility of you getting to know your dental expert much better. Anything to keep that perfect smile, right? It seems like only days ago when you would make a fool of yourself just to provoke that toothless grin.

tweeners

malocclusion what?

(10–12 years)

A tweener with malocclusion simply means she has crooked teeth or an off bite; or more specifically, an under or overbite. Not having enough or having too much room in the jaw, as well as thumb sucking,

pacifier use or tooth loss can all cause malocclusion. The good news for such a big word is that smile can be fixed with braces. Rather than getting into the components and how braces work, let’s take a look at three quick thoughts that are bound to come to your mind:

• What age? There isn’t a magic age or window of time for braces. Braces can actually be beneficial when there are still baby teeth present or into adulthood. The issue being dealt with determines when treatment starts. Many orthodontic problems are easier to correct when the jaw is still growing, so somewhere between the ages of 9 and 13 seems to be optimal, but again the problem will dictate when the treatment starts.

• How long? The time frame for using braces depends on the complexity of the problem being treated. Generally, braces can correct the respective problem in about 1 to 3 years.

• How much! Of course we want our tweener to have a movie star smile, but braces aren’t a cheap endeavor. It is perfectly fine to inquire about cost with your orthodontist. Find out what’s included in their fees, if there are financing options or payment plans, and what extra charges may come up.

Check out www.bracesinfo.com/50_questions.PDF for a list of recommended questions you should ask your orthodontist before starting treatment.

84% of 17 year olds have tooth decay.

Teens are old enough and smart enough to understand the need to take care of their teeth. While much of their concern may be cosmetic, proper dental health offers benefits that run much deeper.

teens (13–18 years)

habits for the long haul

Gum disease occurs when the tissues and bones that surround and support the teeth become infected. Surprisingly, 60% of 15 year olds experience gingivitis, which is the first stage of gum disease. This isn’t anything to mess around with. Research has found a direct link between heart disease and the bacteria that causes gum disease. Heart disease is the nation’s leading killer, so taking every precaution available is worth it. So, brush twice a day, floss at least once a day (by the way, brushing without flossing is like washing only 65% of your body) and get to the dentist for regular checkups and cleanings.

no grinding zone

Bruxism is the medical term for teeth grinding, which typically happens during sleep. Grinding can cause the fracture, loosening and even loss of teeth. In severe cases, it can affect the jaws and even cause hearing loss. Stress and anxiety can contribute to teeth grinding, but it is more likely caused by an abnormal bite or missing/crooked teeth. Your dentist can fit your teen with a mouth guard that can be worn during the night to protect his teeth, but there are some other things that can help reduce or prevent teeth grinding:

• Say no to stress – Help your teen de-stress, whether it means getting counseling or starting an exercise program. Help him find what works.

• Kick the caffeine – Limit or avoid the amount of pop, chocolate and coffee being consumed.

• No gum – Chewing gum or biting on hard objects, like pencils or pens, gets the jaw muscles used to clenching. sources: www.cnn.com, www.bracesinfo.com, www.braces.org, www.healthkids.org, www.webmd.com, www.saveyoursmile.com, www.babycenter.com

Who is Sally?

sally says

She is our quintessential, “do-it-all” mom and friend who reminds us to remember the woman behind the mom.

are you bringing

sexy back?

story by | jodie harvala Ok ladies, time to put on your big girl panties! With Valentine’s Day in our midst let’s dive into a conversation about inner sexiness. What makes you feel sexy? No holding back on this one!

What makes me feel sexy now is different than it was 10 years ago! Some of you may agree that as time changes we need to adjust our way of thinking a bit. You add kids, a few extra pounds, a busy lifestyle and that adjustment may not always be easy.

Let’s start with the definition of sexy. Webster defines it as “sexually suggestive or stimulating.” For me sexiness has evolved and my definition has changed. Step into my world, the world of me and my three boys. First there is the big one, my hubby, who on some mornings, as I am busy getting ready, will pull back the shower curtain and say, “Hey, honey, check this out,” as he proceeds to give me

a little shimmy-shimmy-shake. Then there is the six year old who will breeze by naked on his way to the potty, “HEY MOOOMMM, check this out” as he shakes his “booty” at me. Lastly there is the two year old, who is naked because he has not yet learned the art of going potty and keeping his clothes on all at the same time, screams, “I DID IT – I DID IT,” as he goes to the bathroom in the big potty. So ladies, I am a bit desensitized at the whole shimmy-shimmy-shake if you know what I mean.

Let’s think about it. We all have a different idea of what makes us feel sexy. Is it an unexpected dozen roses and a candle light dinner? Maybe it’s a sassy pair of stiletto heels and a lacy little bedtime number. Or, maybe it’s just cuddling up on the couch after the kids are in bed. For me, I LOVE coming home to a clean house that I had no part of picking up. This makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. If the big boy really wants some action, I say, “Do the laundry! Wash, dry, fold and PUT IT ALL AWAY!” This will no doubt drive

me over the top! Yum! How about a hot outfit? Yes, please! Add the appropriate accessories…even better. A night to wear that hot outfit with my hubby is always a plus, but a night out with the girls is just as good. Guaranteed, they will REALLY tell me how hot I look in my hot outfit. But I have to admit the ultimate feeling of sexiness for me is having sexy hair! I need to have kick butt hair to feel really in the groove with myself. Why? I have no idea. I just do. A friend once said, “Well, if you need an attitude adjustment just go get your hair done!” She is right! That’s something I keep in my back pocket for emergencies…a new doo.

So my challenge for you is to find that diva and inner sexiness hiding in us all. Is it physical, emotional, or simply confidence under-cover? You may have to think outside the box a little more these days with all the little people doing laps around you, but you can do it. Take the time. You deserve it and remember; sexiness always starts from within. So…ask yourself, “What makes me feel sexy from the inside out?”

A World of Wonderment

photography by | rialee photography

Parents' The Fair

Here's the story for local parents who are bringing up three very lovely girls or busy with three boys of their own. No matter the size of your family, Parents' Fair will have a bunch of useful booths, speakers and material.

March 28 • 8 a.m.-4 p.m.

Fargo Civic Center

parentsfair.meritcare.com