Marveling Modesty
by Carrie Christopher
As we explore the concept of modesty, we can glean from two different definitions that will be used to shape this column with the love of Jesus. The first way to define modesty, according to the Merriam Webster dictionary, is “propriety in dress, speech, or conduct.” The Christian angle of this is how we can honor God in our outward appearance, conduct and speech so that it is worshipful towards Him. The second definition, according to the Merriam Webster dictionary, is defined as “the quality or state of being unassuming or moderate in the estimation of one’s abilities.” May this column usher us forward into the beaming truth of 1 Timothy 4:12 (NIV), which says, “Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.” Prior to my salvation, there were so many years that my outward appearance was my identity. I was a slave and what was on the outside was my master. Call it what you may, I essentially worshipped myself. Selfglorifying, self-exalting worship streamed through outward perfection. I fought ferociously to perfect what was on the outside. I desired to continually plunge my weight down “low” enough, aiming at what the worldly fashion magazines deemed as “beautiful.” The latest styles and fashions clung to my eyes, luring me to dress to impress. I painted my pain away with bold make up on my face, and covered up all of my insecurities with clothing to hide the screaming desire inside of me to be loved, accepted and secure. I believed a lie of man-pleasing and selfish ambition in order to look and feel the “best.” This worldly identity controlled my emotions. My temporary happiness came from whether or not I felt beautiful in what I was wearing, had a good hair day, or a perfect makeup application. This was all rooted in my lack of knowing Christ and who I am in His love. I was striving for perfection on the outside because, on the inside, my heart and soul were starving for His love and grace to free me from the guilty garrisons and shackles of my heart. When I met Jesus, He began to overturn the temporary identity of inward beauty. His vast, transformative love began to heal my soul in ways that outward beauty never could. But this took time, and lots of it. 68
